Me aha koe mēnā kei te whakapae koe kei te tinihanga tō tāne engari kāore he taunakitanga

"E whakapae ana ahau kei te tinihanga taku tāne, engari kāore āku taunakitanga." He tino kino tēnei āhua. I tētahi taha, he whakaaro kino kei te tinihanga tāu tāne, ā, kāore e taea e koe te whakakore. I tētahi atu taha, me pupuri tonu koe i te āhua kia kore ai e whara ōna kare ā-roto mēnā kāore he pūtake o ō whakapae, he kino atu rānei, kua whakakorea ō wehi kino rawa atu mā te kī he koretake, he paranoia rānei.

Mena kua kōrero kē koe ki a ia mō tēnei kaupapa, ā, kua whakakahoretia rawatia e ia, kātahi ka tū hei ārai i a koe, ka whakapae i a koe he raruraru whakawhirinaki, ā, kei te takaro koe hei patunga, mēnā rānei kua waiho ō whakapae hei pūtake pakanga mau tonu i roto i te whanaungatanga, kua kino haere pea ō āwangawanga. Tērā pea ka honoa taua kare ā-roto o te tinihangatia ki a koe anō me te ruarua i a koe anō e whakaaro ana, "Kei te tinihanga taku tāne i ahau, kei te mataku rānei ahau?"

Āe, ko te mea tuatahi, ki te mea kei a koe te whakaaro kino kei te tinihanga tō tāne, ā, kāore e taea e koe te whakakore, koia pea kei te tinihanga ia. Engari nā te mea he whakaaro puku noa iho tōu kei te tinihanga ia, kāore he taunakitanga, he uaua te whakatere i tēnei haerenga mai i te whakapae ki te whakaū. Tukua mātou kia āwhina i a koe ki te whiti i roto i ēnei wai pōuri.

Me pēhea te mōhio kei te tinihanga tō tāne — me te kore he taunakitanga tūturu 

"Ki taku whakaaro kei te tinihanga taku tāne engari e whakakahore ana ia." "E whakapae ana ahau kei te tinihanga taku tāne engari kāore āku taunakitanga." " Kei te tinihanga taku tāne ki ahau, kei te mataku rānei ahau ?" Ko ēnei raruraru katoa e puta ake ana i ō kare ā-roto, i ō whakaaro rānei e kī ana ki a koe kāore tō hoa rangatira e pono ana. He maha rawa ngā wā ka warewarehia, ka pehia rānei e tātou tēnei reo iti i roto i ō tātou mahunga, i runga i te whakaaro nui, i te mataku rānei ki ngā mea ka puta mēnā ka tutuki ō tātou wehi kino rawa atu.

Engari kei te tono atu mātou kia kaua e hohoro te whakakore i tēnei reo. E whakaatu ana ngā rangahau he nui atu i te kare ā-roto te pūmanawa hinengaro. He "mōhiohio ngaro i roto i tō tātou tinana, i tō tātou roro rānei hei ārahi i a tātou i te ao". Nō reira, ki te whakapae koe kei te tinihanga koe i roto i tō marena, tera pea nā te mea kei te hopu tō tinana me tō hinengaro ngaro i ngā tohu ngaro kāore i taea e tō hinengaro mohio te mārama. Heoi anō, he onge ngā tohu o te tinihanga i te ihu pērā i ngā paru rīpene ngutu me te hinu kakara o tētahi atu wahine i runga i te hāte o tō tāne.

Ina hoki, he uaua ki te kite i ngā tohu ā-tinana e tinihanga ana tāu tāne, nā te mea ki te kore ia e hiahia kia mau, ki te kore rānei e aro ki te heke mai o tana marena, ka whakapau kaha ia ki te huna i ana mahi. Ko te mea nui ki te kite i te tinihanga ko te aro ki ngā tohu ngaro e tinihanga ana tāu tāne, kua kitea kētia e tō tinana me tō hinengaro:

1. Kia aro ki ngā huringa ngawari o tana whanonga

"E whakapae ana ahau kei te tinihanga taku tāne engari kāore āku taunakitanga. Me aha ahau?" Tīmata ki ngā mea taketake. Nā te mea kua moe kōrua ko ia, ā, kei te noho tahi kōrua, he pai ki te whakaaro kua mōhio pai kōrua ki tāu tāne. Nō reira, ki te kore ia e noho ko ia tonu, ehara i te mea uaua ki a kōrua te kite i ngā tohu o ngā whanonga rerekē/tauhou.

• Kei te huna ia i ana kōrero?
• He ahua koretake ana whakautu?
• Te āhua nei kei te māharahara ia i roto i tōna ake kāinga?
• Ki tō whakaaro kei te nui ake tōna ahotea i tō te tikanga?
• Kāore ia e hono atu ki a koe pērā i te hononga e tika ana mā te hoa piri?
• Ahakoa kei te kāinga ia, e māia ana rānei ia ki te noho tahi me koe?
• Ka pāngia rānei ia e ngā huringa ohorere o tōna kare ā-roto, ā, kāore he mea e whakaoho ana i a ia?

Mena kua whakautua e koe he "ae" ki te nuinga o ēnei pātai, kāore he mea miharo kei te whakaaro kino koe kei te tinihanga tō tāne . Tērā pea ka whakaatu te tāne tinihanga i ēnei tohu nā te mea ka uaua te kare ā-roto me te hinengaro ki te whakataurite i ngā whanaungatanga e rua, ngā hoa e rua, me te ngana tonu ki te huna i ngā ara o te tangata.

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2. Kua rerekē rānei tōna whakaaro ki a koe?

Ko tētahi atu tohu o te tinihanga a tō tāne ko te panoni o tōna waiaro ki a koe. Tērā pea ka riri ake ia, ka poto, ka kino ake hoki tana taunekeneke ki a koe. Mēnā kāore he atu taumahatanga i roto i tōna ao e mōhiotia ana e koe, ā, kāore tēnei whanonga i te āhua o tōna āhua, tera pea ko tētahi o ngā tohu o te kore whakapono.

Tērā pea kua rerekē tana waiaro ki a koe nā tētahi o ēnei take, nā tētahi ranunga rānei o ngā take e rua:

• Te hara tinihanga: te te hara o te tinihanga Kei te kai kino ia i a koe. Ina noho tahi ia me koe, ka nui haere ēnei kare ā-roto, ka riri ia.
• Ngā kare ā-roto e huri ana: Nā te aroaro o tētahi atu wahine i roto i tōna ao i tōia ia ki roto i te mahanga whakataurite. Ka ine ia i ngā mea katoa e mahia ana e koe ki tētahi atu wahine i roto i tōna ao, ā, nā te mea he āhuatanga hou, he āhuatanga whakahihiri hoki tō hononga, ka iti haere tōu aro ki a ia. Kāore e kore, ko ōna kare ā-roto mō tana hoa moepuku pea i pā ki te āhua o ōna kare ā-roto mōu.

3. Whakawhirinaki ki ngā hoa me te whānau pono

Ko tētahi huarahi hei whakahaere i te whakaaro kei te tinihanga ia, kāore he taunakitanga, ko te tirotiro mēnā kua whakapaetia koe e ētahi atu i tō taha. Engari kia tūpato, ā, whakamahia tēnei huarahi anake - ā, me whakamahi anake - mēnā he hoa, he mema whānau rānei ōu e whakawhirinaki pūmau ana koe. Mēnā koinā, kōrero ki te hunga e tata ana ki a koe, whakapuakihia ō āwangawanga me ō kare ā-roto, ka pātai atu ki a rātou mēnā kei te whakapae anō hoki rātou kei te tinihanga tō hoa. Tērā pea ka taea e rātou te tuku mai i ētahi whakaaro hei āwhina i a koe ki te aromatawai mēnā he tika ō kare ā-roto.

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4. Whakauru atu ki tana waea me tana rorohiko

Ehara i te mea pai te huna i te tuara o tāu tāne, me te takahi i tōna tūmataitinga, e mōhio ana mātou. I roto i tētahi whanaungatanga hauora, me whakaute ngā hoa e rua i te wāhi whaiaro me ngā rohe o tētahi ki tētahi. Engari i te mea kei te kapi koe i ngā whakaaro pēnei i te "Ki taku whakaaro kei te tinihanga taku tāne engari e whakakahore ana ia" me te "Ki taku whakaaro kei te tinihanga taku tāne engari kāore āku taunakitanga", kua hipa koe i taua wā. I tēnei wā, ko te hura i te pono te mea nui rawa atu.

Nō reira, kimihia he wā pai hei tirotiro i tana waea, rorohiko, me ētahi atu taputapu hiko hei rapu taunakitanga kei te tinihanga tō tāne i a koe. Kia tūpato,

• Mena kei te tinihanga ia, tera pea he nui rawa tana tiaki i ana taputapu, ā, ka uaua pea ki a koe te tiki atu.
• Kāore rānei, tera pea ka tino tupato ia ki te horoi i ana taputapu i mua i te hokinga mai ki te kāinga.
• E rua pea āna waea, he rerekē ngā wāhitau īmēra, me ērā atu mea hei pupuri i ana mahi hē kia matara rawa atu i tōna oranga ki a koe.
• Tērā pea kei te whakamahi ia ngā waehere karere kuputuhi a te hoa tinihanga ki te kōrero ki tana hoa moepuku, ko te tikanga ka ngaro pea i a koe ngā taunakitanga ahakoa kei mua tonu i ō kanohi

Ahakoa he tino whakamarie mēnā kāore koe e kite i ngā taunakitanga o te tinihanga i roto i te waea a tō tāne, kaua e whakaaro he tohu pono tēnei kāore ia e tinihanga ana, ā, kaua e tukua tō tiaki. He arai noa iho pea tēnei hei ārai i a koe kia kore ai ia e hongi i a koe.

5. Mātaki mēnā he rerekē te reo o tōna tinana

Ki te titiro koe ki ngā wāhi tika, tera pea ka kitea e koe ngā tohu ā-tinana kei te tinihanga tō tāne i a koe. Kāore, ehara i te mea ko ngā tohu rīpene ngutu i runga i tōna hāte, he ngau aroha i runga i tōna uma, he kakara rānei o tētahi atu wahine i runga i tōna tinana. Kei te kōrero mātou mō ngā tohu ā-tinana ka whakaatuhia e ia mēnā ka hara ia mō te tinihanga i tō whakawhirinaki.

Tīmatahia te aro nui ki te reo tinana o tō hoa rangatira. Koinei te huarahi māmā ki te hopu i tētahi hoa tinihanga nā te mea tera pea ka whakaatu ia i ētahi tohu o te manukanuka me te mahi tinihanga. Hei tauira, tera pea ia

• Kaua e titiro kanohi ki a ia, ina koa ka whakautu koe i ngā pātai mō tōna wāhi noho
• Kia pōrearea i ētahi rā
• Kia māharahara, kia āwangawanga hoki mēnā ka tono koe kia tangohia tana waea
• Ka nui rawa ana mahi i roto i ngā kōrero hei huna i tōna manukanuka
• Āta karohia te whakapā tinana ki a koe

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6. Tirohia mēnā he tauira kei roto i ngā huringa o tana kaupapa mahi

Kei te kī koe, kei te whakapae ahau kei te tinihanga taku tāne, engari kāore āku taunakitanga. Nā, kāore ēnei whakapae i puta noa mai i te rangi kore, tika? Tērā pea kua puta he huringa i roto i ngā whanonga me ngā tikanga a tō hoa rangatira i whakaoho i tēnei wehi i roto i a koe. Ko tētahi o ngā tohu tino noa e whakapae ana te tangata kei te tinihanga ia i roto i ā rātou whanaungatanga ko te maha rawa o ngā pō roa i te mahi, te maha rawa rānei o ngā haerenga ki te mahi.

Anei te whakatau matua: Ki te mea kei te mahi pō tō tāne nā te mea kua puranga te mahi, ka pō roa ia i te kāinga. Engari ki te mea he pō noa iho i te wiki, i te marama rānei, he mea rerekē tēnā. Ā, me aro atu koe ki tēnā.

Mena ka mahi pō noa ia i ngā Wenerei, me haere ki te mahi i ngā Rāhoroi rerekē, me haere ohorere rānei ia wiki kotahi i te marama, i ia wiki torutoru rānei, tirohia mēnā he tauira kei roto. Tērā pea kei te whakamahi ia i te tinihanga tawhito rawa atu o te pukapuka takaro a te hunga tinihanga hei whakawātea i ana hara.

7. Kei roto ia i tētahi hononga ki tana waea pūkoro?

Ahakoa e hara ana tātou katoa i te nui rawa o te whakamahi i ā tātou taputapu, he tohu whakatūpato pea tēnei mēnā kua tīmata tāu tāne ki te whakapau i tōna wā waatea katoa ki tana waea pūkoro. Tērā pea,

• E rua ngā wā e pau ana i a ia i te wharepaku ināianei
• Ka roa ake te kaukau
• He pai ake ki te noho ki te taupee, ki te whakamahau rānei me tana waea me te kapu kawhe i a koe e noho ana i te kīhini, e āwhina ana i ngā tamariki ki ngā mahi kāinga, e okioki ana rānei i runga i te tūru me te mātakitaki pouaka whakaata.
• Ahakoa kei roto ia i te rūma kotahi me koe, e noho ana ia me tōna tinana e anga atu ana i a koe, me tōna māhunga e huna ana i roto i tana waea pūkoro.
• I te pō, ka tatari ia kia moe koe, kātahi ka tahuri ka mahi i tana waea tae noa ki ngā hāora o te ata

Mena kua nui ake te hiranga o te waea a tō tāne ki a ia i a koe, tera pea he tohu tēnei o te tinihanga a ia. Ko te tangata i tērā pito kua nui rawa te hiranga ki a ia, ā, he pai ake ki a ia te hono atu ki a ia mā te ipurangi i te hanga hononga ki a koe.

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8. Aroturuki i ana mahi pāpāho pāpori me ana hītori

Ki te pātai tonu koe ki a koe anō, "Kei te tinihanga taku tāne i ahau, kei te mataku rānei ahau?", mā te tirotiro i ana mahi pāpāho pāpori me te heru pai kia kite ai me pēhea tana whakapau i tōna wā ki te ipurangi ka āwhina pea i a koe ki te kimi i te whakautu. Kimihia he huarahi hei uru atu ki ngā pūkete pāpāho pāpori a tō tāne, ā, tirohia mēnā,

• He maha ngā kōrero tauhou e taunekeneke ana ia me ētahi atu — ngā DM, te whakautu ki ngā kōrero, ngā pai, ngā kōrero
• Ngā kōtaha, ngā ingoa rānei e puta pinepine ana i roto i tana hītori rapu
• Ngā pūkete rerekē i whakatūria me te whāinga anake ki te whakahaere i tētahi hononga ā-ira, i tētahi rārangi hononga ā-waho poto rānei

I tēnei ao hangarau, kāore e hiahiatia ana e tō tāne te puta atu i te whakamarie o tō kāinga ki te tinihanga i a koe. Ko te pikinga ake o ngā hononga ā-ipurangi he tohu tera pea he hononga whānui tōna — he hononga poto rānei — i te ao mariko katoa. Tērā pea kei te tuku karere kuputuhi ia mā te whakamahi i ngā waehere karere kuputuhi a te hoa tinihanga, kei te whakawhitiwhiti whakaahua tahanga, kei te whai wāhi atu ki te moepuku ataata werawera i a ia e noho ana i tō aroaro.

9. He āhua tawhiti, he āhua noho puku rānei ia i ōna kare ā-roto?

Mena he tangata kē atu kei roto i te oranga o tō tāne, he mea maori noa iho kāore ia e tino aro ki te marena. Ahakoa kāore ia e whakaaro ana ki te wehe atu, ka ārai te whanaungatanga kē atu i tōna kaha ki te whakapau kaha ki te poipoi i tana hononga ki a koe. Nō reira, tera pea ka whakaaro koe kei tawhiti tō tāne i ngā kare ā-roto , kei te noho puku hoki.

• Kāore pea ia e hiahia ana ki te noho tahi me koe
• Ko aua kōrerorero o te pō mō ngā mea katoa, ā, kāore he mea kua waiho hei mea o mua.
• Kāore koe e mōhio he aha kei roto i tōna hinengaro
• Ahakoa kei a koe ia i te taha tinana, e rite ana koe ki te mea kua tirotirohia e ia ōna kare ā-roto me tōna hinengaro

Tērā pea nā ēnei panonitanga o tana whanonga i whakaaro ai koe, "E whakapae ana ahau kei te tinihanga taku tāne, engari kāore āku taunakitanga."

10. Kua kite koe i ētahi panonitanga i roto i tō oranga moepuku?

Ina pāngia te whanaungatanga piripono o te ngākau i roto i te whanaungatanga, ka whai ake te whanaungatanga piripono ā-ira tangata. Kāore pea i a koe he taunakitanga hei whakaatu i te tinihanga o tō hoa, engari, tera pea nā ngā huringa o tō oranga ā-ira tangata, kāore he take, kua ara ake tō whakaaro kei te hē tetahi mea. Kāore ō whakapae mō te tinihanga pea i te koretake mēnā ko tō tāne,

• E whakaatu ana i te hiahia moepuku tino teitei
• Kāore rānei e whakaatu ana i te hiahia nui ki te taatai
• Ahakoa kei tawhiti, kei tūpato hoki te āhua, ahakoa i roto i ō kōrua wā piripono, me te mea nei i roto i tōna hinengaro, kei te whakapuaki ia i tēnei wheako ki tētahi atu
• He rerekē te taunekeneke ki tō tinana. Hei tauira, ka kite pea koe kei a ia ētahi nekehanga hou i runga i te moenga (ka ngana tonu pea ia ki te mahi tahi me koe ahakoa kāore koe e tino pai ki aua nekehanga) he hiahia ohorere rānei ki ētahi nekehanga, tūranga, tere, me ērā atu mea.

11. Ki te tino atawhai rawa tō tāne, tera pea nā te mea kei te tinihanga ia

Kei te whakaaro koe kei te tinihanga ia, kāore he taunakitanga? Whakaarohia, nā te mea he pai rawa atu tō tāne, kāore e taea te whakapono? I mua, ko ia tōna āhua hapa, whakarihariha, ātaahua, arohaina, ā, ko te mea nui, ko te pono ki a koe. He āhua rerekē me ngā whanonga i akiaki i a koe ki runga i te pakitara, engari he nui hoki ngā mea i arohaina e koe mōna.

I tētahi wā, ka rerekē tēnei āhuatanga. Ināianei, ka kite koe i te tino atawhai o tō tāne i ngā wā katoa, engari i tētahi ara, he āhua tinihanga. Tērā pea nā te mea he pērā tonu. Ko tēnei whanonga tino atawhai, e aro ana ki te whakaiti i ngā tautohetohe me te ārai i te kitenga i te tinihanga i roto i tō marena, tera pea he hua nōna i te whakaaro hara mō tana tinihanga. He mahi tinihanga noa iho rānei kia kore ai e mau. Ahakoa he aha tana take, ko te rerekētanga nui o te āhua o te tangata he take nui hei whakapae i a ia kei tinihanga i roto i tō marena.

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12. Whakawhirinaki i to parapara whekau

Nā te mea kua kite koe i ngā huringa o ngā whanonga a tō tāne, ahakoa he āhua huna, he āhua kino hoki, kua whakapuaki pea koe i ō āwangawanga ki a ia. I te korenga o tētahi taunakitanga pakari hei tautoko i tēnā, tera pea kua whakakorekore noa iho tō tāne i ēnei. Kia kore ai koe e whai ake i ēnei whakapae, tera pea kua whai ake ia (tērā pea kei te mahi tonu ia).

• I tahuri ki te whakahaere i ngā kare ā-roto mā roto i aroha-poma, ngā koha utu nui, ngā hararei whakahirahira, me ētahi atu mahi whakahirahira e whakaatu ana i tōna aroha nui ki a koe
• I whakakino i a koe ki ngā kōrero pēnei i te, "He aha koe i whakaaro nui ai i ngā mea katoa", "He whakaaro noa iho tēnei", "Kei te whakakinohia tō tāua whanaungatanga e ō āwangawanga"
• I mahi tiaki, ka meinga koe kia rite ki te tangata kino mō te ruarua i a ia

Ahakoa āna mahi tinihanga katoa, kāore e taea te whakakore i te whakaaro, "Ki taku whakaaro kei te tinihanga taku tāne engari e whakakahore ana ia." Nā te mea, i tētahi taumata, kua mōhio kē koe he pono. Nō reira, whakawhirinaki ki tō ngākau, kaua e whakamutu i taua reo whakatūpato i roto i tō mahunga.

13. Whāia te ara o te whakapae

Kei reira katoa ngā tohu whanonga o te tinihanga. Kua whakatau koe ki te whakarongo ki tō kare ā-roto mō te take, kia kitea ai te pūtake. Ko te pātai, me pēhea? Whaia noa te ara o te whakapae, kia kite ai koe ki hea koe e arahi ai.

Hei tauira, i a koe e tirotiro puku ana i te waea a tō hoa , ka tūtaki koe ki tētahi kōrerorero me tētahi hoapā kua tiakina hei ingoa o tētahi hoa mahi engari he āhua noa rawa te horopaki o te kōrerorero mō tētahi taunekeneke ngaio. Tuhia te nama. Ki te taea, ngana ki te kimi ko wai te tangata nāna te nama. Ki te kore, tirohia anō te waea a tō tāne kia kite ai mēnā kua mukua taua kōrerorero. Kua whakarerekētia rānei te ingoa o te hoapā. He tohu tino kino tēnā.

Waihoki, ki te kite koe i tētahi tauira o te ngaro roa o tō hoa i runga i te whakapae he mahi, he haereere rānei, tirohia ō tauākī putea kia kite ai mēnā ka puta mai ētahi whakapaunga rerekē i aua rā. Ā tōna wā, ka kitea e koe tētahi mea hei whakaū i tō whakapae.

E whakapae ana ahau kei te tinihanga taku tāne engari kāore āku taunakitanga - me aha ahau

Ki te whakapae koe kei te tinihanga tō tāne, mā te aro ki ngā tohu kua whakahuatia ake nei ka āwhina i a koe ki te whakaū, ki te whakakore rānei i aua whakapae. Ki te kore tetahi o ngā tohu e ōrite ana, ā, e whakapono ana koe kāore he take o ō āwangawanga, he pai mōu. Kāore tō marena i roto i ngā wai raruraru i whakaarohia e koe, heoi, he āwhina tonu ki te tūhura i te pūtake o ō raruraru whakawhirinaki me te mahi ki aua mea.

Heoi, ki te kitea e koe ēnei tohu e pā ana ki a koe, ka nui ake pea tō manukanuka "Kei te whakapae ahau kei te tinihanga taku tāne engari kāore he taunakitanga. Me aha ahau?". Ko tō whakaaro tuatahi pea ko te tū atu ki tō tāne, engari ki te kore he taunakitanga pakari, kāore e puta he hua. Ka whakakahore noa tō tāne, ā, koinā tonu. Nō reira, me aha koe? Anei ētahi tohutohu mahi e rima hei whakatau i te kapua pōuri o te kore pono e iri ana i runga i tō marena:

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1. Kohikohia he taunakitanga tūturu mō āna hara

Ko te mahi tuatahi ko te kohikohi i ngā taunakitanga tūturu e whakaatu ana kei te tinihanga tō tāne kia kore ai e taea e ia te whakakahore i te pono, te akiaki rānei i a koe kia whakaaro he porangi koe, ahakoa te whakaaro noa ki tētahi mea pēnei. Ā, me pēhea te kohikohi taunakitanga?

• Rapua tana waea pūkoro, tirohia ngā karere kuputuhi, ngā rangitaki waea, ngā hoapā, me ngā whakaahua i roto i te taiwhanga whakaahua kia kite ai mēnā he mea e kitea ana. Ki te mea he pūkenga tō tāne ki te huna i ana mahi, me mahi tonu pea koe i tēnei, kia kitea rā anō e koe tētahi mea.
• Tirohia tana pire waea kua whakarārangihia kia kite ai mēnā he nama waea e whakapā pinepinetia ana, ā, ki te kitea e koe tētahi mea, tirohia tana waea mēnā ka whakapā atu koe.
• Tirohia tana rorohiko mō ngā kōpaki huna, huna rānei e pupurihia ana, kei roto pea ngā taunakitanga o tana mahi tinihanga — hei tauira, ngā pikitia me ngā ataata
• Tirohia āna kāri nama me āna tauākī peeke mō ngā whakapaunga pēnei i te tina me te kai pō, ngā utu rūma hōtēra, me ngā koha utu nui, ā, tirohia mēnā e ōrite ana ēnei ki ngā rā i ngaro atu ai ia i te kāinga.
• Tirohia tana īmēra mō ngā pukapuka katoa
• Aroturukihia tana hītori GPS kia kite ai mēnā he wāhi e torohia ana e ia i ia wā, kāore koe e mōhio ana, ā, mēnā anō ka tūpono ēnei haerenga me tana ngaro i te kāinga i raro i te mahi, i te haereere rānei.
• Aroturukihia tana hītori tirotiro hei taunakitanga
• Ki te kore he hua o tēnei rapunga mariko katoa, ka taea e koe te whakaaro ki te utu i tētahi kaitirotiro tūmataiti hei whai i ngā nekehanga a tō tāne me te kohikohi taunakitanga mō āna mahi moepuku.

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2. Whakapaua te wā ki te tukatuka i ngā mōhiohio

Ahakoa kua roa koe e whakapae ana i tāu tāne e tinihanga ana, ehara i te mea ngāwari te whakatutuki i ō mataku nui rawa atu. Ka pā mai pea ki a koe te taunakitanga tūturu kua tinihangatia tō hoa rangatira i tō whakawhirinakitanga. Nō reira, tangohia te wā me te wāhi ki te tukatuka i ēnei mōhiohio, kaua e tukua ō kare ā-roto kia whakahaere i ō tauhohenga me te whakapau kaha ki te mura.

E mōhio ana mātou he māmā ake te kōrero i te mahi. Engari mā te tautohetohe mō te kore whakapono ka whakakorikori i tō marena me tō ao e mōhio ana koe. Ko te nui ake o tō mana whakahaere i ō kare ā-roto, ko te nui ake hoki o tō mana whakahaere i te kōrero.

3. Kōrerohia ki tō tāne

Kia whai wā koe ki te whakatau i te raruraru o roto, nohoia tō tāne ki raro, ka whakaatu i ngā taunakitanga kua kohia e koe. Hoatu he wā ki a ia ki te kōrero i tana taha mō te kōrero, ā, whakatakotoria ō whakautu i runga i ana kōrero. Engari whakaarohia ngā āhuatanga rerekē i roto i tō hinengaro, ka whakatau me pēhea e hiahia ana koe ki te whakautu mēnā,

• Ka noho ia hei parepare
• Ka puta mai ia me ngā whakamārama mō te tinihanga i a koe
• Nui rawa tana whakapāha, ka inoi kia murua ia, ka tono kia whai wāhi tuarua ia
• E whakapae ana ia i a koe mō āna mahi hē
• Ka whakakahore tonu ia, ka whakamā ki a koe

Mā tāna whakautu koe e mārama ai me pēhea te whakahaere i te āhuatanga mai i tēnei wā tonu, me te mutunga iho o tō marena.

4. Whakaritea te tiaki whaiaro

Ahakoa te āhua me te roa o te whanoke, ahakoa te whakautu a tō tāne, ehara tēnei i te wā ngāwari māu. Kia taea ai e koe te whakatere i tēnei, me aro nui koe ki te tiaki i a koe anō . Ae, ko te heke mai o tō marena me tō anga whakamua ka pā ki tō hinengaro, engari ahakoa pērā, kia kaha ki te mahi i ngā mahi hei tiaki i tō oranga ngākau.

• Whakaharatauhia ngā mahi whakaaroaro
• Whakamātauria te tuhi hautaka
• Whakawhirinaki ki ngā hoa pono me ngā mema o te whānau mō te tautoko

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5. Rapua he awhina ngaio

Me murua rānei e koe tō hoa tāne tinihanga, me whakamutu rānei te marena? Ki te whiriwhiri koe ki te muru hara, me pēhea te houhanga rongo i muri i te puremu? Ki te whiriwhiri koe ki te wehe atu, kei hea koe ka tīmata ai ki te kohikohi i ngā wahi o tō oranga me tō ngākau maru, ka tīmata anō ai? Ā, me pēhea te pānga kare ā-roto me te pūtea o te whakarere? Me pēhea koe e kitea ai tō ara i roto i te oranga e pakaru ana i mua i ō kanohi?

He mārama, he maha ngā whakatau hei mahi māu. Tērā anō hoki i roto i te āhua kare ā-roto kua pakaru kē. He mea āwhina te rapu āwhina ngaio kia mārama ai koe ki tēnei āhuatanga whakapoauau, kia whakatau ai koe he aha te mea e tino hiahiatia ana e koe, kia rite ai hoki ki ngā taputapu e tika ana hei whakatutuki i taua haerenga. Ka taea e te kaiwhakaora hinengaro mohio te noho hei puna tautoko nui i tēnei wā. Mēnā kei te rapu āwhina koe, kei konei ngā kaiwhakatakoto whakaaro whakangungua, mātau hoki i runga i te rōpū Bonobology hei tautoko i a koe.

He tino kino te whanoke ki te marena. Ki te mea kei te whakapaetia koe kei te tinihanga tō tāne, kāore he painga o te ngana ki te whakamutu i taua reo ki a koe, ki tō marena rānei. Nō reira, whaia te ara o te whakapae, tirohia te huarahi e arahi ai ia i a koe, ā, ahakoa he aha tāu e kite ai, kia mōhio koe kei a koe te kaha ki te wikitoria.

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Ehara tō takoha i te koha aroha . Mā tēnei ka taea e Bonobology te kawe tonu mai i ngā mōhiotanga hou me ngā mōhiotanga hou ki a koe i roto i tā mātou whainga ki te āwhina i te tangata o te ao ki te ako me pēhea te mahi i tetahi mea.

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