Ka rite pea te hungawai wahine hae ki te raiona uha kua whara mēnā ka whara, ka riri rānei ia ki a koe, ahakoa ehara i te mea nāu. Ka taea e ia te huri hei tangata rapu utu, hei tangata uaua. Tata ki ia rā ka rongo tātou i ngā kōrero mō ngā wāhine e pāngia ana e ngā mamae o te hungawai wahine hae, kāore e mōhio ki te aha me mahi. Ko ā rātou whanonga koretake me ngā paerewa tumanakohanga kore e taea te whakakino i te marena hauora, tae atu ki te whakamutu. Engari he aha te mea e hae ai te hungawai wahine ki tana hunaonga wahine? He aha te mea e akiaki ana i a ia ki te whakaaro ki te wawahi i te marena o tana tama hei whakatau noa i ōna āwangawanga? Ā, ko te mea nui, he aha ngā āhuatanga o te hungawai wahine hae?
He aha te mea e hae ai te hungawai wahine?
Ripanga o Ihirangi
Ko te whaea kua whakapau kaha ki te oranga o tōna whānau, ina koa ko āna tamariki, e hiahia ana kia noho hei pokapū mō ngā mea katoa. Kia maumahara ko ia te kaiwhakahaere o ngā whakataunga oranga o tana tama i a ia e tipu ake ana, māna pea e kai ina hoki mai ia ki te kāinga, e tiki rānei i ōna kākahu mōna. Kātahi ka tomo koe ki te whare, ka ngaro atu ngā mea i a ia, ka whakaaro ia kei te ngaro tana mana whakahaere i tōna whānau.
Ko ia, i rite tonu ki te pou matua, kua panaia inaianei ki te taha, tata whakakapia e tetahi he taitamariki ake te kaha, ā, ko tetahi e aro nui ana tana tama ki a ia. Me whai wā tēnei whakawhiti. Tērā pea he tangata kino tōu hungawai , ā, kei te aro nui atu hoki ki a koe, ā, ka pātai ohorere mai rātou ki a koe mō ō whakaaro. Mēnā he rerekē ō kōrua whakaaro, ā, ka whiriwhiria e te tama me tana tāne tō taha, ka nui ake tōna aroha me tōna riri. Tērā pea nā te aro nui ki a koe, te hunaonga hou kua marenatia, ka rite ia ki te tangata whenua kē i roto i tōna ake kāinga!
Ko ētahi o ngā take o tōna hae me tōna koretake ko:
- Ko te nuinga o te wā e noho tahi ana te tama me tana wahine. He wāhi nui tāna i roto i āna whakatau.
- He pūkenga anō tō te hunaonga wahine i tōna hungawai wahine, tera pea he nui ake tōna pūkenga i a ia, ā, ka whakanuia ia i ētahi wā.
- Ko te hunaonga te mea tino pai ki te katoa
- Me te mea nei kāore ia i te ora i roto i te oranga o tana tama
Ngā Tohu o te Hungawai Wahine Hae
Kāore te hungawai hae e rite ki te tuku i te tauera. Ka whakapau kaha ia ki te whakaatu ki tana hunaonga ko ia te rangatira tūturu o te whare. He rite tonu ki te tohu i tōna rohe, te whakaatu ki a ia kei a ia te mana whakahaere, ā, ka karanga i te pakanga. Tērā pea koinei tana huarahi kia mōhio koe me āta haere koe, ki te kore ka riri ia. Kia tūpato ki ēnei tohu o te hungawai hae:
- Ka whakahē ia i ngā mea katoa e mahia ana e koe, ka tūtohu rānei i tētahi huarahi pai ake. He pono tēnā, e kino ana ia ki a koe
- Ka whakanuia e ia ngā mea katoa, ā, e kore tetahi mea e tukua kia ngaro noa atu
- Ka whakararuraru tonu ia i tō kōrua marena, ka tohu ki tāu tama me pai ake tana whakahaere i a koe.
- Ahakoa ngā mea iti noa iho, ka rapu tonu ia i te aro o tana tama, ā, i ētahi wā ka whakaari ia i te mate.
- Ka takaro ia i te patunga i mua i tana tama, ko tētahi tauira tawhito ko tōna wehi i a koe, te hunaonga wahine.
He taiao tēnei i roto i te maha o ngā whare Inia, e rapu tonu ana te hungawai wahine i ngā huarahi ki te whakaeke i te hunaonga wahine, ā-waha, ā-hinengaro, ā-hinengaro rānei, hei whakamarie i tōna ake āhua kore haumaru me te hae. Ahakoa e whakaaro ana te hungawai wahine he pakanga tō te tama hei taonga māna, ka taea e ia te whakararuraru nui i te hunaonga wahine me te tama. Mena ko koe te tama e piri ana i waenganui i tō whaea me tō wahine e pānui ana i tēnei, kei a mātou ētahi whakaaro māu i konei. Kia mahara me wawao koe, me whakarerekē i ngā mea ka huri tō hungawai wahine hei taniwha?
12 Ngā Huarahi Hei Whakatau i te Hungawai Wahine Hae
Mō te noho tahi i runga i te rangimārie me te harikoa, ka kawea atu e mātou ki a koe ngā huarahi kua whakamatauria, kua whakamatautauria hoki e 12 hei whakatau i te hungawai wahine hae, hae hoki. I te nuinga o te wā, ka āwhina tēnei ki te whakangawari i ngā hononga kua taupatupatu, kia maumahara ko tētahi wheako pai ka ara ake mō ngā mea maha atu. Kāore e taea e koe te noho i roto i te whakataetae kiore i roto i tō ake kāinga!
1. Hoatu tōna aro
Ka puta te hae i te koretake o te māia. Ko te mataku ohorere kei whakakapia ia e tētahi kua noho hei mema o te whānau he mea e wehingia ana e ngā whaea katoa. I kōrero a Sona i ia wā ka noho rātou ki te tina, ka whakarite ia kia tatari rātou ki te hungawai wahine, ā, he maha āna kōrero mō āna kai tino pai, ā, i ia wā ka ngana ia ki te kawe mai i tētahi mea māna.
Nā, he mea tēnei kāore anō kia mahia e te tama a te hungawai wahine i mua, nō reira i mōhio ai ia ko te hunaonga wahine te take o te manaaki, ā, ka tīmata ia ki te aroha ki a ia. I tono atu anō hoki ia ki tōna hungawai wahine kia whakaakona ia ki ngā tunu kai motuhake, ā, i whakapau kaha ia ki te mihi atu ki a ia i ngā wā katoa e tunu kai ana ia. Me tono atu koe ki a ia kia whakaakona ia ki ngā tunu kai hou, kia hanga hoki he hononga aroha ki tōna hungawai wahine mai i te tīmatanga.
Kaua e rapu utu, e whawhai rānei ki a ia, me ngana tuatahi koe ki te mārama ki te take o tōna riri. He tangata kare ā-roto ngā wāhine. He huarahi anō tā ia tangata ki te whakatau i ngā raruraru, ko ētahi ka amuamu, ka pōuri, ko ētahi ka whakatau ki te whara i ētahi atu hei ako i a rātou. Kaua e riri ki te whanaungatanga tata o tō whaea me tana tama - kua pēnei pea mai i tōna whānautanga. Ngāna ki te tirotiro i ana whanonga, me te rapu i ngā mea e whakaoho ana i a ia, me te karo i aua mea.
2. Kia mārama ki ōna kare ā-roto
Kia mārama koe ki te pūtake o ōna āwangawanga me ngā mahi e whai ake nei, ka taea e koe te mahi i ngā mahi hei whakakore i aua āwangawanga.
3. Kia mau tonu tana whai wāhi ki te whānau
Ko ia te mema nui rawa atu o te whānau. Kua pau tōna oranga katoa ki te pupuri i te whānau kia kotahi. Ko te tāne i moea e koe he hua nō tōna whakatipuranga pai. Me mea kia motuhake ia. He tino uaua ki a ia te tuku i tana tama i whakatipuria e ia mō ngā tau maha. Me whai wāhi ia ki ngā whakataunga nui me ngā whakataunga iti o te whānau. Ka taea hoki e koe te whakaari he kuware koe kia pai ake ai tōna wairua.
4. Whakakahangia te hononga i waenganui i a ia me tana tama
Ko te mea nui rawa atu ki te whaea ko te aroha o tāna tamaiti. Kia mōhio ia ka aroha tonu tana tama ki a ia pērā i mua, ka tīmata ia ki te pai ki a koe. Whakaaturia ki a ia kāore tō kōrua marena e whakararu i te whanaungatanga whaea-tama. Whakatenatenahia tō tāne kia noho tahi me ia, pātai atu ki a ia me pēhea tōna rā, mēnā he mea e hiahiatia ana e ia. Ka kite tō hungawai wahine ko koe te take o ēnei momo mahi. Ka tīmata ia ki te ruarua i ōna ake ruarua ki a koe. Ka tīmata ia ki te maioha ki ō āhuatanga, ā, ka hoatu hoki he whakaaro nui ki a koe. He kōrero whakamere tā tētahi kōtiro mō tana wikitoria i te whaea o tana hoa tāne i konei.
He Pānui e Pā Ana: Ka Whakarongo Anake Taku Tāne ki Tōna Whaea, Ā, Ka Pupuri I Ahau kia Matara
5. Totoro atu te ringa hoa
Āwhina i a ia i ngā wāhi katoa e taea ana e koe, mahi tahi ki te kīhini, tiaki i ana kakahu, hoatu ki a ia ngā whakapaipai mai i ō taonga i ētahi wā. Me pēhea koe e noho hei hoa kōrero mōna? Tirohia ngā tāngata kāore ia e pai ki a ia, kōrerorero mō taua tangata ki tō hungawai wahine. Kōrerotia atu hoki ētahi mea kāore koe e pai ki a ia mōna.
Ngāna kia noho hei tangata e whakawhirinaki ana ia ki a ia, kia mau tonu tōna whakapono ki a ia anō. Kōrerotia ki a ia te āhua o te whakapaipai, whakamōhiotia ia ki tētahi kaiwhakapai makawe hou (kaua e whakaatu kei te kore koe e pai ki tōna āhua). Āwhina i a ia ki te horoi i te rā Diwali. Ka maioha ia ki ngā mahi a ia, ā, ka whakahoki mai i te aroha. Ā, ki te tika tāu mahi i ngā mea katoa, ka tautoko anō hoki tō tāne i a koe.
6. Āwhina i a ia ki te whakawhiti
Ehara i te mea ko koe anake te tangata e rerekē ana tōna ao i muri i te marena . Kei te pāngia hoki tō hungawai wahine e tētahi huringa nui. I a koe e marena hou ana, ka arohia koe e te katoa, ā, ka whakaaro ia kāore ia e arohia.
I tuhituhi mai a Daksha ki a mātou e kōrero ana mō te āhua o te hurihanga o te waiaro o tōna hungawai, te take matua o te raruraru o tōna hungawai wahine. I tīmata ia ki te tono tohutohu ki a Daksha mō āna kākahu, ā, i mihi ia ki tana tunu kai i ngā wā katoa e tunua ana e ia he rihi. I mōhio a Daksha ki tēnei, ā, ka hurihia e ia te tēpu, ka tīmata ia ki te mihi ki te pūkenga whakahaere whare o tōna hungawai wahine, ki te ataahua o tana whakatipu i āna tamariki, me te pai o tana tiaki i tōna hungawai tane i mua i a ia i ngā wā katoa ka whai wāhi ia. Nā tēnei i puta ai he panoni nui ki te tirohanga a te hungawai wahine ki a ia. Kāore i roa ka noho tahi ngā wāhine tokorua hei tokorua ki ngā tāne tokorua. I te nuinga o te wā, kāore ngā tāne e mōhio me pēhea te hiahia āwhina o te wahine o te whare, ā, ko koe pea te tangata hei whakaoho i a rātou ki tēnā. Kāore te nuinga o te tangata e aro ki tēnei āhuatanga, ā, ka huri te whaea tino pai hei hungawai wahine hae.
Me āwhina koe i a ia mai i te tīmatanga, kia kore ai ia e kite i a koe he tūmomo whakawehi, engari, kia kite i a koe hei hoa whakawhirinaki.
7. Hoatu ki a ia ngā mea ohorere
Pātai atu ki tō tāne, ki tō hungawai rānei, mō ngā mea e pai ana ki tō hungawai, me ngā mea e kore e pai ana ki a ia. Hoatu he mea ohorere ki a ia, kia hari ai ia. Ka kite ia i tētahi taha o koe kāore i whakaarohia e ia, ā, ka manaaki ia i a koe me ngā ringa tuwhera. He maha ngā huarahi hei whakaatu i tō aroha ki tō whaea.
8. Kia maumahara ko te whakawhitiwhiti kōrero te mea nui
Ki te kore e taea e koe te mārama ki ngā whanonga a tō hungawai wahine, kōrerohia. Kōrerohia hōhonu ki a ia. Kia atawhai, kia kore ai ia e riri. Pātai atu ki a ia he aha ia i pēnei ai, ā, pātai atu he aha te hē. Tērā pea ka miharo koe ki te ngāwari o ngā mea mā te kōrero poto noa iho. Tērā pea ka mōhio koe kāore kōrua i te mārama tetahi ki tetahi i te wā katoa!
9. A ape i te pakanga
Hei pupuri i te rangimārie i roto i te whare, he pai ake te karo i ngā pakanga me ngā kōrero ka arahi pea ki ngā pakanga. Ko te huarahi pai ki te mahi i tēnei ko te whakatakoto i ngā rohe i te tīmatanga mō te rangimārie me te harikoa o te katoa. Ka kino noa iho ngā āhuatanga mā te whakatupu i te kawa i roto i te whānau. Ka meinga ētahi atu mema o te whānau kia whiriwhiri taha. Ko tō marena te whanaungatanga ka tino pāngia e ēnei mea katoa. Kia tautuhia ngā āhuatanga o te hungawai hae, ā, kia whakatau i taua mea i runga i te tika.
10. Kōrero ki tāu tāne
Tērā pea he āwhina te kōrero ki tō tāne mō ngā whanonga a tō hungawai wahine. Kaua e amuamu ki a ia mōna. Kōrerotia noa ētahi o ngā mea e whakararuraru ana i a koe. Me tono atu ki a ia kia whakapā atu ki tōna whaea, kia kitea te pūtake o te raruraru i roto i te huarahi whakahoahoa. Kaua e kōrero ki te tama kāore koe e amuamu ana. Tērā pea ka taea e ia te kōrero pai atu ki tōna whaea i a koe, ā, ka āwhina i a ia ki te whakamutu i te pakanga.
11. Kaua e aro ki ana whanonga
Kia tae ki tētahi wā, me whakaae pea koe ki te meka kāore tō hungawai wahine e huri. He pai ake te wareware i ana whanonga, me te arotahi i tō kaha ki ngā mea e nui ake ana ki a koe, arā, ko tō marena. Me kī atu ki a ia kua hoha koe ki te taumahatanga tonu me te ngenge o te taumahatanga mō kōrua, mō te tokorua hoki.
Me whakaatu e koe kua ngana koe ki te whai hononga pai, pai hoki ki a ia, engari kāore e taea i ēnei rā. Nō reira, kua whakatau koe kia kaua e uru atu ki tētahi raruraru āna ki a kōrua, ā, he pai ake kia waiho kōrua tetahi ki tetahi, kia pai ai te noho tahi me ētahi atu mema o te kāinga. Tērā pea ka mōhio ia ki te koretake o tēnei katoa.
12. Nuku whare, neke tāone rānei
Ki te mea kua tae te hae o tō hungawai ki te wāhi kāore e taea e koe te mahi i tētahi atu mea hei whakarerekē i te āhuatanga, ā, kua tae koe ki te mutunga o tō manawanui me tō pai, neke kāinga. Kaua e tukua tēnei whanaungatanga kino kia whakapōrearea i ngā mea katoa o tō ao. I ētahi wā, ko te tawhiti anake te huarahi pai hei pupuri i te hauora o ngā whanaungatanga. Haere ki te toro atu ki ō hungawai me tō tāne i ia wiki, i ia marama rānei. Kia mau tonu te whakapā atu.
He mea tino nui te pupuri i tō hungawai wahine kia noho pai ki a koe. Me whakaae koe ki te meka ka aro tonu tō tāne ki tōna whaea ahakoa te kino o tana mahi ki a koe. Nō reira, he mea nui kia whai whakaaro nui koe ki te āhuatanga. Kia mahara, he whānau katoa tōu e moe tāne ana, ā, he mea nui te whiwhi i te whakawhirinaki o ia mema o te whānau, pērā i te whiwhi i te whakawhirinaki o tō tāne.
Me pēhea te aro atu ki tētahi i roto i tētahi whanaungatanga?
Ehara tō takoha i te koha aroha . Mā tēnei ka taea e Bonobology te kawe tonu mai i ngā mōhiotanga hou me ngā mōhiotanga hou ki a koe i roto i tā mātou whainga ki te āwhina i te tangata o te ao ki te ako me pēhea te mahi i tetahi mea.
Kua maha ngā tau e mahi tahi ana māua ko taku whaea wahine, he wahine whakahihi, he wahine whakatoi. Ki taku whakaaro, ko tēnei rārangi he mea nui kia harikoa ia, ā, ko taku he mea nui kia harikoa ahau. Kāore rawa ahau e aro ki te whakahari i a ia ina kore ia e whakaaro nui ki a ia anō kia whai oranga me ōna ake hiahia. Ehara āna mahi i te aroha, ā, kāore au e aro ki ngā kōrero a te tangata, e kore rawa te whaea aroha e mahi pēnei i tana tama me tana wahine!!!
He tama tāku, ā, kei te inoi ahau kia manaakitia ia ki tētahi wahine whakamiharo, ko te tikanga ka whānau mai he hunaonga whakamiharo māku. Nui rawa tōku aroha ki taku tama, kāore au i te tino aro ki te whakararuraru i a ia, nā te mea he here kino tōku, ā, e kore rawa ahau e tuku i a ia.
Kāore rawa he āwhina. He tangata rapu utu, he tangata whakarihariha, he tangata hae, he tangata whanoke taku whaea! I muri i te 31 tau o te marena, me i kore ahau e tūtaki ki a ia. I whakaiti ia i ahau, i kōrero kino hoki mō ngā tau 20, ā, ko tana mahi anake ko te tautoko i a ia. I tana tīmatanga i tana mahi kino ki taku tamahine matamua, i whakamutua e ahau tana kōrero. Kāore au i kite i a ia mō ngā tau 11, ā, e kore rawa ahau e kite i a ia. He maha ngā mea i akohia e au i a ia; me pēhea te manaaki i ngā hoa rangatira o aku tamariki.
Kia ora! Aroha mai kāore i whai hua te tuhinga ki a koe. Heoi, e koa ana mātou kua tangohia e koe tētahi taahiraa hei karo i tēnei, ā, kāore koe e hiahia ki te aro atu ki tēnei mea. Ki te pā mai he raruraru ā muri ake nei, tukuna mai he mēra ki a mātou ki [email protected] ā, ka taea e mātou te āwhina i a koe ki te whakatau pai ake i te āhuatanga.
He kōrero wairangi tēnei, arā, te kī atu ki ngā hunaonga wahine kia tangohia ngā mea katoa mai i tōna hungawai wahine, me te whakatapua hoki ō tātou oranga ki te whakahari i a ia, ahakoa he tamaiti, kāore e hiahiatia ana te tiaki nui! Tēnā koa!
Āue, he tino kino tēnei! He tino kino rawa atu taku hungawai wahine, ahakoa kua oti i a ia ngā mahi pai. Ahakoa e whakaae ana ahau he mea nui te whai i te tangata nui ake, me te whakauru i a ia ki roto i tō koiora, mā te mahi i ngā mea kua tohua, ka taea e koe te āwhina i ana whanonga. Me whai wāhi koe ki te tiaki i ō ake kare ā-roto, kaua hoki e tukua kia pērā tana mahi ki a koe. Tēnā koa, kōrerotia te pono me te mārie me te whakaute. Ko tāna e mahi ai ki tēnā, kei a ia te tikanga.