E rua tau taku hoa e noho tahi ana me tana tāne. E hiahia ana ia ki te marena, engari te āhua nei kāore te tāne e hiahia ana ki te tono marena. E ai ki a ia, he roa rawa te wā ki te noho tahi me te kore e marena. I kite ahau i te kaha o tana hiahia ki te tango i te whanaungatanga i tana tīmatanga ki te pātai mō te pehea e tono ai i tana hoa tāne, kia pēhea te roa o tana tatari, me te whakamahi rānei i ngā kēmu hinengaro hei tiki i taua mowhiti taumau.
I mea atu ahau ki a ia, "Ahakoa kāore anō ia kia tono atu ki a koe, ehara i te mea kāore ia e aroha ana ki a koe, kāore rānei ia e kite ana i a ia anō e noho tahi ana me koe mō ngā rā e toe ana. Tērā pea kei te harikoa noa ia ki te āhua o ngā mea, kāore ia e kite i tētahi take hei whakarerekē. Me kōrero pono pea kōrua kia kite ai i tōna whakaaro."
Engari, i roto i tana tikanga pakari, ehara i te mea koinei te whakautu i rapua e ia. I hiahia tonu ia ki te mōhio he aha te mea e akiaki ana i te tāne ki te tono marena, me te mea nui, me pēhea te akiaki i a ia ki te tono marena. Nō reira, i kohikohia e au he rārangi o ngā mahi tinihanga 15 ka taea e ia te whakamātau.
15 Ngā Tinihanga Hinengaro hei Whakahau i tō Hoa Tāne kia Tono ki te Hoa, ā, Tata tonu te Whai Hua
Ripanga o Ihirangi
"Mēnā ka mōhio koe ki te huarahi hei tono i a ia kia marena, me mahi pea koe," ka mea atu ahau ki taku hoa. Kua tae pea te wā ki te akiaki i a ia ki te huarahi tika, me te whakaatu ki a ia kāore he mea reka atu i te hiri i te whakaaetanga. Haunga te keke marena, he maha atu anō ngā mea whakamiharo. ngā take mō te marena.
Ahakoa rā, he maha ngā tūponotanga o te tono marena mā te whakapatipati i tō hoa, pērā i te mea ka kitea koe he piripono. Ā, kāore mātou e hiahia ana ki tēnā. Tērā pea ka hiahia tō hoa tāne kore mōhio ki tētahi akiaki iti mai i a koe kia tīmata ai taua mahi. Nō reira, he aha te whakautu ki te pātai me pēhea te tono i tētahi hoa tāne kia tono? Kua tae ki te wā ki te whakamōhio atu ki a ia me haere ia ki a Tiffany's me te whakaharatau ki te tuturi ki raro. Kia mahara, ko te mea nui ko te pupuri i te āhua mārire.
Ko tāu noa he noho i te taiwhanga whakaahua, tuku tohutohu pai engari kaha, ka tatari kia mahia e ia te toenga. Whakapono mai ki ahau, he haerenga ngahau tēnei. Nō reira, me ēnei tinihanga 15 kei roto i tō ringaringa, tera pea ka tata te marena.
Te pānui e pā ana: 13 Ngā Huarahi Hei Whakamōhio i a Ia ki Tō Utu
1. Whakaroahia te kōrero nui mō te marena
He ahua rerekē te whakaaro, e mōhio ana mātou, engari me waiho tēnei hei taahiraa tuatahi i roto i tēnei rārangi mō te akiaki i tō hoa tāne ki te tono marena. Ka nui ake tō pēhanga ki tō hoa tāne, ka nui ake pea tana ātete. Ki te tohe tonu koe i a ia kia marena ki a koe, ka kitea tonutia e ia ngā take e kore ai ia e pena.
Kua kite koe i te wā e ngana ana koe ki te hopu i tētahi ringa onepu kia pūmau, ka marere noa atu i roto i ō maihao? Me mōhio ia ko tēnei te taahiraa e whai ake nei i roto i tō kōrua whanaungatanga, kaua e herea ia ki roto. Ehara i te mea kia akiaki i a ia kia marena koe, ā, ka mutu i roto i te marena kore arohaEngari kaua e pātai tonu ki a koe anō, "Ka mārena ia i ahau?", whakaarohia te mahi i ēnei e whai ake nei:
- Whakawāteahia te wā ki te aromatawai i te taumata o te whanaungatanga, mēnā he rite ngā mea e hiahiatia ana e kōrua, ā, kua rite hoki mō te marena.
- Mahi ki te hanga i tētahi turanga pakari mō te whanaungatanga
- Kōrero pono mō te whanaungatanga
- Rapua he tautoko mai i tētahi kaiwhakaora hinengaro ngaio mēnā kei te raru koe ki te mārama ki te whanaungatanga
Te pānui e pā ana: Te Oranga i Muri i te Marena me te Marenatanga – Te Oranga i Muri i te Marena
2. Me pēhea te akiaki i a ia ki te tono marena me te kore e tono: Kia piri ki tōna whānau
Me pēhea te tono i tāu tāne kia marenatia: Whakamīharohia tōna whānau. Ko tētahi o ngā tohu matua e tohu ana i te huarahi o te marena ko te wā e pai ai ngā hoa tokorua ki ngā whānau o tētahi ki tētahi. Kia arohaina koe e tōna māmā, kāore e taea te whakakore ka noho kōrua i roto i te... whanaungatanga ponoKo wai ka mōhio, tera pea ka hamumu ake ia i ō hiahia ki tōna taringa?
Ina kite tōna whānau kei te ōrite kōrua, ā, kei te harikoa tahi kōrua, ka akiaki pea rātou i a ia kia pātai atu ki a koe i te wā e tata mai nei. Heoi anō, he pai ake mēnā ka whakatūria he whanaungatanga ki ōna tuākana, teina, me te kī atu ki a rātou e hiahia ana koe kia marena wawe koe ki tō hoa tāne. Ki te pai rātou ki a koe, whakaarohia kua oti te mahi.
3. Haere tahi ki ngā marena
Ka kite tātou i te whakaaturanga tino whakanuia, engari he tino ataahua o te aroha i ngā hui marena. Ka kanikani te tangata i ō rātou ngākau katoa, ka tangi i te harikoa mō te tokorua, ā, ka tuku i ngā mihi mutunga kore me te harikoa ki a rātou. Ki te kore tēnā e tino rewa ai te ngākau o tō hoa tāne, kāre mātou e mōhio he aha te mea ka rewa.
Me pēhea te akiaki i a ia ki te tono marena me te kore e tono, e whakaaro ana koe? Whakaaturia ki a ia te ataahua o te tukanga. Nō reira, ahakoa kei te moe tō tuahine, he whanaunga noa iho rānei nō te hoa noho o te hoa pai o tō tuahine, kimihia he huarahi hei haere ki taua marena, ka haria tō hoa tāne. Pātai noa ki a ia mō ōna whakaaro mō ngā mea e pā ana ki te marena pēnei i te whiriwhiri i ngā putiputi, i ngā mowhiti rānei i ngā whakanuinga a ētahi atu. Kōrerohia whakaaro homai marena me ia, ā, tera pea ka kite ia i te whai hua o te marena.
4. Kia whai kawenga ā-pūtea
Ehara tēnei i te mahi tinihanga hinengaro, engari he pūkenga ora, he mea nui tonu. Me kite tō hoa tāne kua pakeke koe mō te marena i mua i tana whakarite ki te pātai. Te whakaipoipo i tētahi wahine motuhake He tino ātaahua. Ki te kite ia i a koe he wahine pakari e whakamahi pai ana i tōna mana motuhake pūtea, ka nui ake tōna whakawhirinaki ki a koe ina tae ki te whakakotahi i ngā pūtea.
Ko tēnei whakawhirinaki te tūāpapa mō te marena pai. Whakaritea ō pūtea kia kore ai e tau te taumahatanga ki a ia anake. Kia mōhio koe, kei te noho ia i reira me te rite ki te tono marena engari kei te tatari noa kia whakaatu koe kua rite koe.
Te pānui e pā ana: Kei te marena taku hoa tāne ki tētahi atu, ā, kei te pōuri ahau
5. Whakaarahia te wairua toa i roto i a ia
Kei te hiahia koe ki te mōhio me pēhea te tono wawe i tō hoa tāne kia marena? Āe, kua tae te wā ki te whakaoho i tōna kare ā-roto toa. Ko te nuinga o ngā tāne, he hiahia ā-roto tō rātou kia hiahiatia rātou. Nō reira, ahakoa ka taea e koe te whakawhiti i taua potae i roto i te iti iho i te meneti, pehia te hiahia ki te mahi i tēnā. Karanga atu ki a ia kia haere mai ki te āwhina. Ina rongo ia e hiahiatia ana, e maiohatia ana hoki, ka nui ake tana whakapau kaha ki te whanaungatanga. Kaua e wareware ki te whakanui i te maia e hoatu ana e koe ki a ia i ia wā.
6. Whakaaturia ki a ia te mea e ngaro ana i a ia
Tērā pea koinei te huarahi pai hei akiaki i tō hoa tāne ki te tono marena. I tino whai hua tēnei mahi mā taku hoa, mā Jeanine. I tīmata ia ki te tōia a Peter ki ana pāti tari katoa, ā, i whakauru atu ia ki ētahi atu tāne me ngā wāhine kua pakeke ake, kua mārena. I te kitenga i a rātou, i whakaaro a Peter kua ngaro i a ia tetahi mea. I kaha ake tana aro ki te whakatikatika i tōna oranga me āna pūtea kia taea ai e ia te marena wawe me Jeanine. E toru marama i muri mai, ka tomo a Jeanine ki tana tari me te mau i tētahi toka nui i tōna maihao!
7. Whakanuia koe
Whakanuia tō whanaungatanga, ā, kia mau tonu tō noho hei wahine motuhake e whai ana i ngā mea e tika ana māna. Kaua e mahi i ngā mahi tinihanga pēnei i te whakahāwea i tāu tāne, engari ngana ki te whai i tētahi huarahi pakeke ake.
- Whakaaturia ki a ia kei te harikoa koe ki te mahi i ngā mea ko koe anake
- Whakaritea te tiaki-whaiaro mō tō oranga hinengaro me tō oranga kare ā-roto
- Whakamātauria ngā mahi whakangahau hou, ngā hiahia hou rānei, ā, kia pai te noho mokemoke
- Whakawhirinaki atu ki tō pūnaha tautoko i ngā wā katoa, kaua ki a ia
Me pēhea te kukume i tētahi tāne kia marena koe, he Reddit kaiwhakamahi e mea ana, "Hoatu he iti iho o tō wā me tō aro ki a ia, me mea kia kore ia e tino pai, ā, ina pātai atu ia he aha te take i huri ai te kaha, me kī atu he mea ngahau tēnei engari i te mutunga he whāinga tōu mō te ao, ā, kāore koe i te tino mōhio mēnā ka tutuki i a ia aua whāinga. Ki te hiahia ia ki a koutou katoa, me moe ia i a koe."
Te pānui e pā ana: Te Ārai i te Here: Ngā Take me te Pānga ki ngā Hononga
8. Kōrerohia tōu heke mai
Ka tutuki te tono marena ina kite ia i te pikitia ataahua o kōrua e tīmata ana i te oranga tahi — te hoko whare, te tango kuri, te whakarite hararei, me te whānau. Ko te kōrero mō te heke mai tētahi o ngā mahi tinihanga hei akiaki i tō hoa tāne kia tono marena.
He pai mō te wahine hei mahi i te nekehanga tuatahi. Nō reira, kōrerohia te mīharo o te noho tahi me te koroheketanga tahi. He mīharo rānei te oho ake i te taha o te tangata, me te pārekareka ki ētahi wā marino, i a koe e inu kawhe ana, i mua i te haerenga atu ki te aro atu ki ngā mahi o ia rā. Ko te tikanga, whakaaturia ki a ia kei te whakarite koe mō te hanumitanga o ō kōrua ao.
9. Kia kaha ki te whanaungatanga, engari kaua e tino hiahia
Me pēhea te tono tono i tētahi hoa tāne, e pātai ana koe? Engari ko te noho hei hoa wahine piripono Me te hiahia nui kia rite ki te wahine e pai ana ki a ia, me manaaki ia ia pērā i te wahine pakeke. Kaua e waea atu ki a ia tekau ngā wā i te rā, kaua hoki e riri mena kāore ia e hoki mai ki te kāinga mō te tina. Engari,
- Kia mau ki to mana motuhake
- Whakatipuhia ōu ake hiahia takitahi
- Whakatakotoria he rohe hauora e whakatutuki ana i ngā hiahia o kōrua ko tō hoa
- Me mahi i tō tipu ake hei whakanui i tō whakaaro nui ki a koe anō
- Kia manawanui, kia tukua kia ahu whakamua te whanaungatanga.
Kaua e manukanuka ki te pehea e taea ai e koe te tiki i tētahi tāne kia marena māu, engari kia arotahi ki te noho hei hoa wahine pai. Mā te nui o tō aroha ki a ia, ka taea e koe te whakamanawa atu ki a ia kua whakaritea kōrua kia noho tahi.
Te pānui e pā ana: Te Ārai i te Here: Ngā Take me te Pānga ki ngā Hononga
10. Whakaaturia ki a ia te hiranga o tō tuakiri
Hei whakaoho i tōna hiahia ki te marena ki a koe, me whakaatu e koe te pai o tēnā mōna. Me mahi koe i ngā mea katoa kia whakaaro ia ko koe te hoa tino pai mōna. Ehara i te mea kāore anō kia pērā, engari me whakaatu e koe ko koe tonu te tangata māna.
Mai i te maumahara tika he aha te tikanga o tana ota kawhe kia mōhio ai koe me pēhea te whakamarie i a ia i ngā rā kino, te haere atu ki waho, me te noho hei wahine e hiahia ana ia ki te marena. Ā, koinei te mea e tono ai te tāne kia marena. Me:
- Tautokohia ia, ā, whakatenatenahia hoki ia e te pono
- Whakaaturia e taea e ia te whakawhirinaki ki a koe
- Whakaatuhia te maioha mō ngā mea e mahia ana e ia
- Kia waiho hei awe pai, hei puna whakahihiko hoki
- Whakaaturia te aroha me te mārama kia tae mai ai ia ki a koe i ngā wā e hiahiatia ana
11. Kōrerotia ki a ia ō whakaaro mō ngā marena me ngā mowhiti
"Kāore he mea nui o te mowhiti nui." "E pēhea ana te ataahua o te marena i te takutai moana?" Mā ēnei kōrero ka āwhina i te arataki i te kōrero ki te huarahi e hiahiatia ana e koe. Whakahuatia i a koe e mātakitaki ana i tētahi whakaaturanga marena i runga pouaka whakaata, kōrero rānei mō tētahi tangata rongonui e moe ana, kātahi ka arataki i te kōrero ki te āhua o tō marena moemoeā e whakaarohia ana.
Ki te kore koe e tino mōhio me pēhea te tono i tāu tāne kia tono marena, whakamātauria tēnei. Mā tēnei ara ā-korekore, ka mōhio ia kei te pupuri tonu koe i ētahi tumanako me ngā wawata mō te āhua o tētahi marena māu. He tohu anō tēnei kei te tino pono koe. te whakaipoipo mō te marena ā, tera pea ka akiaki i tāu tāne kia whakakorikori i ana hikoinga me te tere ake.
Te pānui e pā ana: He tino tono nui taku hoa tāne
12. Me pēhea te tono i tō hoa tāne kia marena: Hoatu he wāhi ki a ia
He mea miharo te āhua, tika? He aha koe ka tuku wāhi ai ki a ia ina rapu ana koe i tētahi otinga hei ārahi i tētahi tāne ki te marena i a koe? Engari kia maumahara, ahakoa kāore ia i kōrero mō te marena, ehara i te mea kāore ia e kōrero. Ko te pono, kāore pea ia i te rite. He mea nui kia ako me pēhea, ā, āhea hoki. kōrerohia te marena me tō hoa rangatira.
Kāore e whai hua te akiaki i a ia ki te hoatu i taua mowhiti taumau ki a koe. He maha ngā tohutohu ka taea e mātou te tuku atu hei akiaki i tō hoa tāne ki te tono marena, engari ehara i te mea ko te akiaki i a ia tētahi o aua tohutohu. Heoi anō, ka taea anake te whai hua o tētahi whanaungatanga mēnā he rite ngā hiahia o ngā hoa e rua.
Me pēhea te mōhio kei te hiahia ia ki te marena i a koe, he Reddit kaiwhakamahi e mea ana, "Kāore ia e tono marena kia rite rā anō ia. Ehara i te mea he kai tunu kai pai koe, he wahine kāinga pai rānei, he hoa moe tāne rānei. Ka tono ia kia marena koe i a ia ina rite ia ki te tango i taua mahi. Ki te ngana koe ki te tinihanga i a ia, ki te akiaki rānei i a ia ki te tono marena, e kore e pai te mutunga."
13. Me mea kia ngaro koe i a ia
Kua whakaaro kē koe mō te kupu "mō te ngaro atu ka nui ake te aroha o te ngākau?" Ki te hiahia koe ki te mōhio me pēhea te tono i tō hoa tāne kia tono, mā te whakamātau i tēnei whakataukī tawhito ka taea pea te mahi. 'Wareware' ki te waea atu ki a ia, tīmata te whakamahere ia wiki. ngā pō whakangahau a ngā kōtiro me ō hoa, me haere takitahi rānei. Hoatu he wā ki a ia kia ngaro koe, kia wheako hoki i te āhua o tōna ao me te kore koe i te taha.
I tino ngenge taku whanaunga, a Normani, i te tatari kia tono mai tana hoa tāne, a Andrew, kia moe rāua, ā, ka hoki whakamuri ia, ka haere ki te Dominican Republic. Ahakoa i pai a Andrew ki tēnei, he tohu nui tōna ngaro atu i a ia. I muri i tēnei, me ētahi atu mahi tinihanga, kāore i roa ka mōhio a Andrew kāore e taea e ia te ora me te kore ia.
Te pānui e pā ana: Te Aroha Mutunga Kore: He aha te Aroha, ā, kei te noho tūturu rānei?
14. Tangohia te pēhanga moni i a ia
Ko ngā kōrero mō ngā pūtea pea te whakautu ki te pehea e tono ai ia kia marena. Kia mōhio koe, ko te tino take e whakaroa ana ia ki te tono i a koe kia marena, he mea kei te penapena moni ia hei hoko mowhiti māu. Kāore ia i te mōhio kāore koe e aro nui ana ki te mowhiti, engari ko te tere ake o te tukanga (ki te kore koe e aro nui). Ki te tino mōhio koe kāore he mea nui ki a koe he mowhiti nui, he mowhiti marena rānei, me whakamōhio atu ki tō hoa.
Kōrero atu ki a ia kāore he mea nui te mowhiti nui mō te marena, me kī atu rānei i tētahi mea ātaahua pēnei i te, "Ahakoa he mowhiti Play-Doh he ataahua ina marena koe i te tangata tika." Kāore, engari e mārama ana ia. Tohutohu āwhina: Tāpirihia tēnei rārangi ki roto i tō oati marena.
15. Kōrerotia ki a ia ō tumanakohanga ā muri ake nei
Me tīmata wawe tonu mēnā kei te hiahia koe ki te mōhio me pēhea te akiaki i tētahi tāne kia marena i a koe i roto i ngā rā 30. Mēnā kāore tētahi o ngā mahi tinihanga i runga ake nei i puta mai ai ngā hua e hiahiatia ana e koe, he tohu tēnei me tino whakapau kaha koe. Hei whiwhi i taua mowhiti taumau, me tuhi mārama pea e koe ō hiahia. Ā, he māmā noa iho te haere atu ki a ia me te tono i tētahi wātaka. Me:
- Whakaarohia ō tumanakohanga i mua i te whakawhitiwhiti kōrero ki a ia
- Kia maumahara ki te wā me te wāhi hei kōrero
- Kia mārama ki tāu e hiahia ana
- Kia rite ki te whakarongo ki ōna tirohanga, me te kimi i tētahi huarahi waenga
- Kia pono ngā tumanakohanga, nā te mea kāore pea ngā mea e tutuki i tāu e pai ai
Kia maumahara, kaua e hoatu he kupu whakamutunga ki a ia, engari me hoatu he tohu mārama e hiahia ana koe ki te kawe i ngā mea ki tētahi taumata e whai ake nei. Tērā pea ka whakaatu ia ngā tohu e hiahia ana ia ki te marena i a koe rawa.
Tohutohu Matua
- Ko te whakatakoto i ō tumanakohanga te otinga pai rawa atu pea ki te whakatau me pēhea te marena i tētahi tāne i roto i ngā rā 30.
- Engari ko te aro ki te pātai, "Ka moe ia i ahau?", ngana ki te ora i tōu ake oranga. Ki te kore ia e kite i tō uara, ka kite tētahi atu.
- Me pēhea te akiaki i a ia ki te tono tono, me mutu rawa te kōrero mō te marena kia kore ai e nui rawa te pēhanga ki a ia.
- Me pēhea te mōhio kei te hiahia ia ki te marena i a koe: Ka kōrero ia mō te heke mai ki a koe, ā, ka whakauru i a koe ki roto i āna mahere
Nō reira, kua mutu tēnei rārangi o ngā huarahi hei akiaki i tō hoa tāne ki te tono marena. Ko te mea nui kia maumahara koe i konei, kaua e tinihanga i a ia. Hoatu he ohorere me he kitenga engari kaua e whakararuraru i a ia. I te mutunga, ko ia tonu te aroha o tōu ao. He mea nui ake, ki te mea kāore anō ia kia rite ki te marena, kia aro atu hoki ki tēnā.
FAQs
E ai ki te kōrero, "Ina tika, ka tika." Mā tō puku e whakaatu te wā tino pai ki te pātai i tēnei pātai tino motuhake ki tāu wahine tino motuhake. Ko te mea pai, me whakaipoipo mō te iti rawa 1-2 tau i mua i te taumau. Me hoatu tēnei wā ki tō whanaungatanga kia mōhio pai ai kōrua tetahi ki tetahi kia pai ai te noho tahi mō te wā roa.
I mua i te pātai tika atu ki a ia mō āna mahere mō te marena, me whakamahi koe i ētahi mahi tinihanga hei tere ake i te tukanga. Tāpirihia ngā tohutohu mō tētahi marena tino pai, mō tō kōrua heke mai rānei ki roto i ā kōrua kōrero auau. Haere atu ki ētahi marena me ia, ka whiti i ō maihao kia mahana ai tōna ngākau, kia tatari ai ia ki te kite i a kōrua e hikoi ana i taua arawhata. Kia tino manaaki, kia tino aro, kia tino whai whakaaro hoki, kia kore ai ia e titiro ki tētahi atu huarahi mō tētahi hoa pai ake.
Tērā pea ko tōna āhua pūtea. Kia tino mōhio rā anō ia ki te whakarato i tētahi oranga whakamarie mōu, tera pea kei te whakaroa ia i te tono marena. Me kite hoki ia i a koe he tangata haepapa, he tangata pakeke e kaha ana ki te tiaki i te kāinga me ngā whānau e tū ana i tōna taha.
Tō Aratohu ki ngā Wātaka Whakawhanaungatanga me ō rātou Tikanga mōu
He pai te marena - he aha ngā mea ka riro i a koe, he aha ngā mea ka ngaro i a koe?
Kāore tō koha e kiia he kaupapa aroha takohaMā tēnei ka taea e Bonobology te kawe mai i ngā mōhiotanga hou me ngā mōhiotanga hou ki a koe i roto i tā mātou whainga ki te āwhina i te tangata katoa o te ao ki te ako me pēhea te mahi i tetahi mea.
