Njira 20 Zotsimikizirika Zomupangitsa Kudziona Wolakwa Pokuvulazani

Zimakhala zowawa kwambiri ngati mwamuna amene timamukonda ndi kumukhulupirira watikhumudwitsa, kaya mwa kuchita zinthu mosaganizira kapena kusakhulupirika kwambiri. M’mikhalidwe imeneyi, n’kwachibadwa kudabwa kuti mungam’pangitse bwanji kudziimba mlandu chifukwa chakukhumudwitsani. Mungafune kuti amve chisoni chifukwa cha zochita zake ndi kumvetsa mmene anakukhudzirani.

Tsopano mungaganize kuti kupangitsa munthu kudzimva kukhala wolakwa kungamveke kukhala kosasangalatsa ndi kosathandiza. Komabe, kafukufuku wokhudza cholinga cha kudziimba mlandu komanso momwe kungakhalire kothandiza kunalingalira kuti kudzimva kukhala wolakwa kungatilimbikitse kuchitapo kanthu ndi kukonza zowonongekazo.

Chifukwa chake, mukuwona, kupangitsa wina kudzimva kuti ndi wolakwa chifukwa cha zochita zake kumatha kuchita zodabwitsa ndikutulutsa zotsatira zomwe mukufuna kuwona mwa iwo. Komabe, ziri kwa mnzanuyo kutenga udindo pa khalidwe lake ndi kukonza. Komabe, tikuthandizani kusankha njira yomwe ingakuthandizireni kuti azindikire kufunikira kwanu. Werengani!

Njira 20 Zotsimikizirika Zomupangitsa Kudziona Wolakwa Pokuvulazani

Ngati mwakhumudwitsidwa ndi munthu amene mumamukonda, zingakhale zovuta komanso zopweteka. N’kwachibadwa kufuna kuchititsa munthu amene wakukhumudwitsaniyo kudziimba mlandu chifukwa cha zochita zake. Ngakhale kuli kofunika kukumbukira kuti kudziimba mlandu sikuli koyenera kapena kopindulitsa pakapita nthawi, kungakhale chida chothandizira kufotokozera zowawa ndi zovulaza zomwe zochita zawo zadzetsa. Malinga ndi kafukufuku, kunapezeka kuti kulowetsa munthu wolakwa kungathe kuchitidwa ndi cholinga chopeza zotsatira zabwino kwa nthawi yaitali.

Mungafunse kuti, “Kodi mungatani ngati chibwenzi chanu chikunyalanyazani?” Kapena “Kodi mungamupangitse bwanji mnyamata kudziimba mlandu chifukwa chakukhumudwitsani?” Tili ndi mayankho. Munkhaniyi, tiwona njira 20 zotsimikizirika zomwe zikuwonetsani momwe mungamupangitse kuti azidziimba mlandu chifukwa chakukhumudwitsani. Kuyambira kukhazikitsa malire mpaka kufunafuna chithandizo kuchokera kwa abwenzi ndi okondedwa, njirazi zingakuthandizeni kuwongolera mkhalidwewo ndikuyamba kuchira ku zowawazo.

1. Fotokozani mmene zochita zake zimakhudzira thanzi lanu la maganizo

Chimodzi mwazinthu zofunika kwambiri zomwe mungachite ngati wina wakukhumudwitsani ndikufotokozera momveka bwino momwe zochita zake zimakhudzira thanzi lanu. Izi zikutanthauza kuuza munthuyo mmene anakumverani komanso mmene zikukukhudzirani. Kusalankhulana ndipo kumvetsa kungatsogolere ku ndewu zobwerezabwereza, koma sizingamupangitse kumva kuti akupweteketsani pokhapokha mutaika maganizo anu patsogolo pake momveka bwino. Mutha kuwonetsa zoyipazo ponena izi:

• "Nthawi zonse ndimawopa kuti sindipeza umboni wokwanira chifukwa mumangotsutsa malingaliro anga"
• “Ndimavutika kukhulupirira anthu tsopano chifukwa chakuti mwandichititsa kuti ndizidzidalira”
• “Mawu anu nthawi zonse amandipangitsa kudziona kuti ndine wosafunika, amandikhudza kwambiri pantchito yanga”

Ndi gawo lofunikira pothandiza winayo kumvetsetsa kuzama kwa zochita zawo. Zimawapatsanso mwayi woti atengerepo udindo pamakhalidwe awo ndikukonzanso.

Kuwerenga Kofanana: Njira 15 Zothetsera Mavuto Achibwenzi Popanda Kuthetsa Chibwenzi

2. Yanani naye mwachindunji

Ichi chikhoza kukhala chiyambi chabwino cha momwe mungapangire bondo kuti akupwetekeni inu. Ngati mukuona kuti ndinu womasuka, kambiranani naye za zochita zakezo ndipo mufotokoze mmene zakukhumudwitsani. Mukakhala naye ndikumuuza zakukhosi kwanu mwachindunji, zitha kukhudza kwambiri psyche yake. Simuyenera kunena zambiri kuti mupeze zotsatira zomwe mukufuna.

Malinga ndi kafukufuku, amuna mwachibadwa sadzimva liwongo mofanana ndi akazi, chotero, kungoyang’ana ‘kungoyang’ana’ kupwetekedwa mtima kumene iye anakuchititsirani kukuseweretsa pankhope panu, pamene mum’dziŵitsa kuti wakukhumudwitsani, kungasonyeze mfundo yanu mogwira mtima. Simudzasowa ngakhale kunena zambiri. Onetsani momveka bwino kuti khalidwe lake silinali bwino ndipo chifukwa chokha chomwe mukukambirana naye ndi chakuti akuyenera kutenga udindo ndikubweretsa kusintha mwamsanga.

3. Mungamupangitse bwanji kuti azidziimba mlandu chifukwa chakukhumudwitsani: Gwiritsani ntchito mawu akuti “Ine”

Pofotokozera zakukhosi kwanu, ndikofunikira kugwiritsa ntchito mawu akuti “Ine” osati “inu”. Mwachitsanzo, mukamakangana, gwiritsani ntchito mawu monga akuti “Ndimakhumudwa mukanena/kuchita izi” m’malo monena kuti “Mwandikhumudwitsa.”

Malinga ndi Tony Robbins ' blog, "Chidziwitso cha I chimatikakamiza kuyankha pazomwe tikuganiza komanso momwe tikumvera komanso kutilepheretsa kuimba mlandu anzathu." Zimakuthandizani kuti muziganizira kwambiri mmene mukumvera komanso zimene zinakuchitikirani chifukwa cha mawu opwetekawo m’malo moimba mlandu munthu wina. Njira imeneyi ingamuthandizenso kumvetsa maganizo anu komanso kudziimba mlandu.

Nazi njira zina zomwe mungatchulire ziganizo zanu m'malo monena kuti "Mwachita / mwanena izi." Gwiritsani ntchito mawu awa kuti amve chisoni pokukhumudwitsani:

• “Zimandipweteka kwambiri ndikapanda kuyankha mameseji anga kwa maola ambiri”
• "Ndikufuna chikondi chochulukirapo komanso ubwenzi wakuthupi mu ubale wathu"
• “Ndimadziona ngati wopanda ulemu ndikakuuzani zimene ndikusankha komanso maganizo anga”
• “Ndakhumudwa kuti simunakwaniritse zolinga zathu”
• “Ndimaona kuti palibe amene amandichirikiza ndiponso kuti ndine ndekha m’chigwirizano chimenechi pamene ndiyenera kuchita ndekha ntchito zapakhomo”
• “Ndimaona kuti palibe amene akukumverani mukangonyalanyaza maganizo anga komanso osayesa kumvetsa maganizo anga”

4. Musalole kuti achoke pa mbedza mosavuta

Zingakhale zokopa kuyesa kusiya kukhumudwitsa mnzanuyo, makamaka ngati mumamuganizirabe. Komabe, ndikofunikira kuyimirira ndikumveketsa kuti zochita zawo zinali zosavomerezeka.

Izi ndi zomwe zimachitika ngati mumulola kuti achoke mosavuta:

• Zimatumiza uthenga woti khalidwe lakelo nlovomerezeka ndiponso kuti palibe vuto kuti akuchitireni nkhanza
• Ikhoza kupanga chitsanzo cha nkhanza mu ubale
• Mwina sangaone kuti inuyo kapena maganizo anu ndi ofunika kwambiri
• Kukhoza kuwononga kudzidalira kwanu ndi kudziona kukhala wofunika

5. Musalole kuti azikunyozani kapena kukuchititsani kukayikira mmene mukumvera

Nkofala kwa onyenga kuyesa kupotoza nkhaniyo ndi kupangitsa ena kukayikira malingaliro awo ndi zokumana nazo zawo mwa kunena mosalekeza zinthu monga: “Sizimene zachitika, simuli kuganiza molunjika” kapena “Mungakhulupirire bwanji zinthu zoterozo ponena za ine?” Ngati mnzanuyo ayesera kukunyengererani kapena kukupangitsani kukayikira momwe mukumvera, ndikofunikira kuyimirira ndi kukumbukira kuti ndinu oyenera kukhudzidwa ndi malingaliro anu.

Dziphunzitseni nokha momwe mungachitire ndi mnzanu wowunikira gaslight osadzikayikira. Kuyimirira mwamphamvu ndikuwunika kwanu za khalidwe lake loipa kudzamupangitsa kuzindikira kuti zoyesayesa zake zilibe phindu, ndipo adzavomereza zolakwa zake pamapeto pake.

Kuwerenga Kofanana: Kujambula Umunthu Wopepuka - Chifukwa Chake Anthu Ena Amakupangitsani Kukayikira Ubwino Wanu

6. Musalole kuti achepetse kupweteka kumene anakukhumudwitsani

Zimakhalanso zofala kuti amuna ena ayesetse kuchepetsa mavuto omwe abweretsera okondedwa awo. Ngati mnzanuyo ayesa kuchepetsa kupweteka kumene anakukhumudwitsani, ndikofunikira kuzindikira kuti zomwe mukumva ndi zomveka. Musalole kuti akupangitseni kumva ngati mukutambasula zinthu mopanda malire. Adzakupangitsani kuganiza kuti zomwe adachita sizinali zazikulu m'njira zotsatirazi:

• “Linali vuto laling’ono chabe, palibe chodetsa nkhawa”
• “Tiyeni tikambirane zinanso. Pali zinthu zinanso padziko lapansi”
• Palibe vuto, siyani kuchita mopambanitsa”

7. Musamulole kuti azisewera wozunzidwayo

Stephanie Sarkis, mlangizi wovomerezeka komanso wovomerezeka ndi board, alemba izi Nkhani ya Forbes, "Pa maubwenzi, oyatsira gasi amaseweretsa wovulalayo kuti anyengerera ndikuwaimba mlandu anzawo kuti achite zofuna zawo."

Njira ina yodziwika bwino ya anthu otere ndiyo kuyesa perekani mlandu kwa ozunzidwa awo. Ngati mnzanuyo ayesa kusewera wozunzidwayo kuti apewe kuyankha pazochitika zawo, ndikofunikira kuyimirira ndikuwonetsetsa kuti khalidwe lawo silidzanyalanyazidwa. Pamene muwalanda mphamvu zawo zakukunyengani, mumawakakamiza kuti aganizire zochita zawo. Musawalole kuti apulumuke ndi kupotoza udindo ndikupangitsa kuti ziwoneke ngati ndiwe wolakwa.

8. Mungamupangitse bwanji kuti anong’oneze bondo chifukwa chakukhumudwitsani: Muziikira malire

Pamene wina wakulakwirani pokusiyani, m’pofunika kudziikira malire kuti mudziteteze ndi kukupatsani moyo wabwino. Izi zingamupangitse kumva kuti akusiyani.

Ziribe kanthu momwe mungafune kungomutumizira meseji kuti adzimve wolakwa chifukwa chakukhumudwitsani, musatero. Kuika malire amakulolani kulamulira ubwino wanu ndikuthandizira kusonyeza munthuyo kuti zochita zake zimakhala ndi zotsatira zake. Zimatumizanso uthenga womveka bwino kuti simudzalola kuvulazidwa komanso kuti mukuyembekezera chithandizo chabwino m'tsogolomu.

Njira zina zomwe mungakhazikitsire malire paubwenzi wanu:

• Kuchepetsa kuyanjana naye
• Kuika malire pa zomwe mumamasuka nazo ndi zosavomerezeka
• Kuwonetsetsa kuti zikhalidwe zanu ndi malire akulemekezedwa
• Kukhazikitsa zotsatira za pamene malirewo aphwanyidwa
• Kukana zopempha kapena zofuna zomwe zili zosayenera kapena kuphwanya malire anu
• Kuwonetsetsa kuti malo anu akuthupi ndi amalingaliro komanso moyo wanu ukulemekezedwa

9. Dzisamalire

Ndikofunika kuika patsogolo ubwino wanu ndi kudzidalira kwanu, komanso kudzisamalira nokha mutapwetekedwa ndi munthu amene mumamukonda. Izi zingaphatikizepo kutenga nthawi yopumula ndi kubwezeretsanso, kudzikonda wekha momwe mulili, kuchita zinthu zodzisamalira monga kuchita masewera olimbitsa thupi kapena kusinkhasinkha, kapena kupeza njira zothanirana ndi malingaliro omwe mukukumana nawo. Mungadabwe kuti, “Zikuoneka kuti n’zopanda ntchito pomupangitsa kudziona ngati wolakwa,” koma kudzisamalira kumathandiza m’njira zotsatirazi:

• Zimawonetsa munthu amene wakukhumudwitsani kuti mumadziona kuti ndinu wofunika kwambiri kuti mufune kuyankha chifukwa cha khalidwe lawo loipa
• Amanena kuti simudzalola zochita zawo kukufotokozerani
• Zimakuthandizani kuti mukhale olimba mtima komanso olimba kuti mukhale okonzeka kuthana ndi zovuta zomwezi m'tsogolomu

Kuwerenga Kofanana: Momwe Mungadzikonde Nokha Ndi Thupi Lanu Mosasamala Anthu

10. Funsani anzanu ndi achibale kuti akuthandizeni

Kuchita ndi munthu amene wakukhumudwitsani kungakhale kovuta, ndipo ndikofunikira kukhala ndi njira yothandizira kuti ikuthandizireni. kumanganso chikondi pambuyo pakuwonongeka kwamalingaliro. Izi zingaphatikizepo kulankhula ndi bwenzi kapena wachibale kapena kujowina gulu lothandizira. Idzakupatsani chithandizo chamalingaliro ndi chothandiza chomwe mungafune kuti muchiritse ndikuthana ndi zowawa zomwe mudakumana nazo. Zingakuthandizeninso kukhala ndi maganizo oyenera komanso kukumbukira kuti simuli nokha. Umu ndi momwe zingamupangitse kumva kuti akupweteketsani:

• Sangathe kukuchitirani zoipa mukakhala ndi chithandizo chothandizira
• Popempha thandizo kwa anzanu ndi achibale anu, mungamusonyeze kuti zochita zake sizinakupwetekeni inu nokha, komanso anthu amene mumawaona kuti ndi ofunika kwambiri.
• Ngati mukuganiza kuti, "Kodi mungatani ngati chibwenzi chanu chikunyalanyazani?", fufuzani mabwenzi anu onse awiri. Ngati simunalakwe, adzakuthandizani, zomwe zingamuthandize kumvetsetsa khalidwe lake. Ikhoza kukupatsirani chidziwitso chotsimikizika komanso chidaliro chakuti simuli nokha m'malingaliro anu
• Malingana ndi kafukufuku, kuvomereza - mu maubwenzi okondana, kuchokera kwa abwenzi, ngakhale kwa alendo - ndizofunika kwambiri kwa anthu. Kukhala m’gulu kumathandiza anthu kudzimva otetezeka komanso otetezedwa. Chifukwa chake, mnzanuyo angafune kuvomerezedwa ndi anthu ena akangosiya, ndipo izi zimamupangitsa kudzimva wolakwa

11. Yesetsani kumvetsera mwachidwi

Izi zikutanthauza kuchita mokwanira ndi zomwe munthu akunena ndikuwonetsa kuti mukuyesera kumvetsetsa momwe amawonera. Izi zikhoza kuchitika pogwiritsa ntchito zizindikiro zapakamwa monga kugwedeza mutu, kufunsa mafunso omveka bwino, ndi kubwereza zomwe ananena. Malinga ndi nkhani lolemba Susan Krauss Whitbourne, Ph.D., pulofesa wa pa yunivesite ya Massachusetts Amherst, “Kukhala womvetsera mwachidwi kumatanthauza kuti sikuti mumangoonetsetsa kuti mukumvetsera mwachidwi komanso kuti wokamba nkhaniyo adziwe kuti ndinu ndani.”

Pomvetsera mwachidwi, mumasonyeza kuti ndinu wokonzeka kumvetsera ndi kuganizira momwe mnzanuyo akuonera zomwe, modabwitsa, zingamuthandize kudziimba mlandu chifukwa cha zochita zake.

12. Gwiritsani ntchito ziganizo za "ife" mutadziwa bwino ziganizo za "Ine".

Njira ina yodabwitsa koma yothandiza kwambiri yopangitsa mnzanuyo kudziimba mlandu chifukwa chakukhumudwitsani ndi kugwiritsa ntchito mawu oti “ife”. Kugwiritsa ntchito mawu oti "ife" kumathandiza kuti munthu asinthe maganizo ake kuchoka pa kulakwa/kulakwitsa n'kuyamba kuvomereza kuti nkhaniyo iyenera kukonzedwa pamodzi. Izi zitha kuthandiza kufalitsa zodzitchinjiriza zilizonse ndikulimbikitsa mnzanuyo kuti agwiritse ntchito kulakwa kwawo potengera zochita zawo.

Mukuyang'ana oyambitsa zokambirana kapena mawu oti amupangitse bondo kukukhumudwitsani? Nthawi zina kugwiritsa ntchito mawu akuti "ife" kumatha kukhudza kwambiri. Yesani izi:

• “Tiyenera kuthera nthaŵi yochuluka monga banja” m’malo monena kuti “Simukhala nane”
• “Tinasemphana maganizo” m’malo moti “Mwandikhumudwitsa”
• "Tikuyenera kulankhulana bwino ndi kumvetserana kwambiri” m’malo mwa “Simundimvera”
• Tonse awiri tiyesetse kukonzekera masiku oti tizikhala ndi chibwenzi n’kukhalabe ndi moyo” m’malo monena kuti “Simumakonzekera n’komwe madeti, nthawi zonse ndimayenera kuchitapo kanthu”
• "Tiyenera kuthandizana pa zolinga ndi zokhumba za wina ndi mnzake" m'malo mwa "Simumakhulupirira maloto anga"
• “Tiyenera kukhala omasuka ndi oona mtima kwa wina ndi mnzake ponena za mmene tikumvera ndi zosoŵa zathu” m’malo moti “Mwandinamiza”
• “Tiyenera kusonyeza kuyamikira ndi kuyamikirana wina ndi mnzake nthaŵi zonse” m’malo monena kuti “Simuyamikiranso zinthu zimene ndimakuchitirani”

13. Kuyesetsa kukhululuka kungachititse kuti nayenso azidziimba mlandu

Kukhululuka sikutanthauza kulola munthu wina kusiya mbedza kapena kulekerera khalidwe lawo. Ndiko kuleka mkwiyo ndi mkwiyo kuti muchiritse ndi kupita patsogolo. Ngakhale sikophweka, kukhululuka muubwenzi akhoza kukhala omasuka kwambiri komanso opatsa mphamvu. Ikhozanso kukhala sitepe yopita ku dongosolo la 'momwe mungamupangitse kuti adzimve wolakwa chifukwa chakukhumudwitsani'. Mwa kuika pambali mkwiyo wanu ndi kupatsanso ubwenzi wanu mpata wina, zochita zanu zikasonyeza chikondi chanu kwa iye. Zimenezi zingam’pangitse kuzindikira kufunika kwanu ndi kudzimva kukhala wolakwa ponena za kukukhumudwitsani.

Kuwerenga Kofanana: Pokhululuka Nkhani Inandiletsa Kudzipha

14. Kodi mungatani kuti mnyamata azidziimba mlandu chifukwa chakukhumudwitsani? Sangalalani ndi moyo wanu!

Kusangalala ndi kusangalala kungasonyeze kuti simukukhumudwa ndi khalidwe la munthu winayo ndiponso kuti simukuwalola kusokoneza moyo wanu ndi chimwemwe chanu. Anganenenso kuti mukupita patsogolo m’malo mongoyendayenda m’mikhalidweyo. Momwe mungamupangitse kuti anong'oneze bondo chifukwa chakukhumudwitsani, tili ndi maupangiri angapo kwa inu omwe amaphatikiza kudzisamalira:

• Kuchita nawo zinthu zosangalatsa (kucheza ndi abwenzi, kuchita zosangalatsa, kapena kupita paulendo) kuti mukweze mtima wanu ndikuyiwala za nkhaniyi.
• Kudzisamalira bwino komanso kuzindikira kufunika kwanu ndi kudzidalira mwa kupeza nthawi yopuma yokwanira, kudya bwino, ndi kuchita masewera olimbitsa thupi
• Kukwaniritsa zosowa zanu zakuthupi ndi zamaganizidwe kuti mukhale okhazikika komanso amphamvu
• Kupatula nthawi ndi anthu abwino omwe amakusangalatsani, omwe amakulimbikitsani, komanso omwe angakulitsire malingaliro anu
• Kuwona kuti mukuchita bwino popanda iye kungamupangitse kudziimba mlandu

15. Pezani nokha chithandizo

Mmodzi mwa owerenga athu ochokera ku Austin adatifunsa kuti, "Kodi mungatani ngati chibwenzi chanu chikunyalanyaza?" Bweretsani kuganizira kwanu. Katswiri angakuthandizeni kukonza malingaliro anu, kumvetsetsa mphamvu za ubale wanu, ndikupanga njira zothanirana ndi vutoli. Sikuti chithandizo chimangokuthandizani kuti muchiritse ndikupita patsogolo, komanso chingakupatseni zida zofotokozera zosowa zanu ndi malire anu moyenera m'tsogolomu. Pozindikira kusintha komwe mukufuna mu ubale wanu kudzera mu chithandizo, mutha kumuuzanso molimba mtima.

Chidziŵitso chanu chatsopano chidzampangitsa kukhala wolakwa, kudzamthandiza kukuonani kukhala wofunika kwambiri, ndi kum’sonkhezera kubweretsa masinthidwe ogwira mtima mu umunthu wake. Mu Forbes nkhani Pofotokoza zifukwa zoyesera chithandizo cha kulankhula, Alice G. Walton analemba kuti: “Ubwino waukulu wa chithandizo n’chakuti sikuti kumangokuthandizani kudzidziŵa bwino nokha komanso kukuthandizani kumvetsetsa anthu ena.”

16. Funsani chithandizo cha maanja

Kodi mungamupangitse bwanji kudziimba mlandu chifukwa chakukhumudwitsani? Pitani ku chithandizo cha banja. Ndi njira yabwino yopititsira patsogolo kulumikizana ndikukonzanso ubale pokuthandizani inu ndi mnzanu kuzindikira machitidwe omwe angayambitse kusamvana. Koma zidzamukhumudwitsanso. Umu ndi momwe chithandizo chingathandizire:

• Wothandizira adzaonetsetsa kuti nonse mukunena gawo lanu. Chifukwa chake, mu gawoli, mutha kumupangitsa kuti amve chisoni pakukusiyani nokha kuti mutenge zidutswa za ubale wanu womwe ukukulirakulira.
• Ngati simungathe kumuuza momwe mukumvera mwachindunji, ofesi ya akatswiri ikhoza kukhala malo abwino kwa inu. Pamenepo, mutha kubwera ndi mawu olondola kuti amve chisoni pakukupwetekani
• Pofunafuna chithandizo cha maanja, mukuwonetsa kuti simunataye chidwi ndi chibwenzicho. Kuti mwadzipereka kuthana ndi mavuto anu ndikumanganso ubale wanu. Zimenezi zingamupangitsenso kumva chisoni
• M'malo momupangitsa kuti anong'oneze bondo chifukwa cha zochita zake, mukulemba ntchito sing'anga kuti achite chimodzimodzi. Koma m’njira yomangirira
• Wothandizira akhoza kukuthandizani kuti muyankhule malire anu ndi mnzanuyo

17. Lembani kalata yomupangitsa kudziona kuti ndi wolakwa chifukwa chakukhumudwitsani

Nthawi zina zimakhala zovuta kufotokoza zakukhosi kwathu pamaso pathu, makamaka tikamakonza zowawidwa ndi munthu amene timamukonda. Mutha kuganiza kuti mungofunika kutumizirana mameseji kuti azidzimva kuti ndi wolakwa chifukwa chakukhumudwitsani koma kulemba kalata kungathandize motere:

• Ndi njira yochiritsira kwambiri yotulutsira malingaliro anu ndi malingaliro anu, ndikukupatsani nthawi yokwanira yochitira tero
• Ikhoza kukuthandizani kufotokozera malire anu ndi zomwe mukuyembekezera
• Nthawi zina mawu olembedwa amatha kufotokoza bwino zakukhosi kuposa kulankhula
• Mawu olembedwa ndi amphamvu kwambiri pomupangitsa kumva kuti ali ndi mlandu chifukwa chakukhumudwitsani
• Kalatayo ikhala ndi iye ngati chikumbutso kuti asabwereze zolakwa zake - Malangizo abwino kwambiri amomwe mungapangire bondo kuti akupwetekeni ngakhale m'tsogolo.

Kuwerenga Kofanana: Kalata Yochokera kwa Mkazi Kwa Mwamuna Yomwe Inamugwetsa Misozi

18. Pumulani pang'ono

Mwina njira yabwino kwambiri ya ‘mmene mungamupangitse kuti adzimve wolakwa chifukwa chakukhumudwitsani’ ndiyo njira yotalikirana naye. Izi zitha kukhala zothandiza makamaka ngati ubalewo uli wapoizoni kapena wopanda thanzi. Kupumula kungakupatseni nthawi ndi malo oti musinthe malingaliro anu ndikusankha zomwe mukufuna mtsogolo mwanu.

Malinga ndi akatswiri azachipatala, "Kukakamira kupuma paubwenzi ndi mwayi wodzizindikiritsanso, kukulitsa chiyamikiro kaamba ka ena ofunikira, ndipo potsirizira pake kuphunzira makhalidwe monga kulolerana ndi kudzipereka kuti ulimbitse ubwenzi wanu." Zingaperekenso mwayi kwa winayo kuti aganizire momwe amaonera chibwenzicho komanso kusintha komwe akuyenera kusintha kuti ukhale wabwino.

Kunyalanyaza kwake mobwerezabwereza malingaliro anu kungakhale chizindikiro chakuti nthawi yakwana yoti mupume muubwenzi wanu. Njira zingapo zopezera nthawi yopuma muubwenzi wanu ndi:

• Tengani mphindi zochepa kuti muchoke pa zokambirana kapena zochitika zomwe zikuyamba kusokoneza maganizo kapena maganizo
• Pitani kokayenda kapena khalani nokha kuti muchotse mutu wanu
• Chitani zinthu zopumula monga kuwerenga buku, kusamba, yoga, kapena kusinkhasinkha
• Pitani kutchuthi chachifupi kapena kutenga sabata lalitali kutali ndi ubale
• Pumulani njira zonse zoyankhulirana ndi wokondedwa wanu kwa nthawi yoikika - Izi zikuthandizani kuti muganizire ndikuwonjezeranso komanso kumupangitsa kumva kuti ali ndi mlandu.

19. Musalole kuti aziimba mlandu ena chifukwa cha zolakwa zake

Musalole kuti aziimba mlandu munthu wina chifukwa cha zolakwa zake kapena kunyalanyaza udindo wake. Onetsani momveka bwino kuti sangalungamitse kukukhumudwitsani pogwiritsa ntchito chisonkhezero chakunja kapena mkhalidwe uliwonse. Kusavomereza kwanu zoyesayesa zake zodzilungamitsa kungampangitse kulingalira za khalidwe lake ndi kudzimva kukhala wa liwongo kaamba ka kuvulaza munthu amene amamkonda. Tawonani njira zotsatirazi zomwe anganenere zochita zake kwa wina kuti athawe mlandu:

• Kodi ndikanadziwa bwanji kuti walakwa?
• “Zonsezi zinachitika chifukwa chakuti zinthu zinali zosatheka kwa ine.
• "Anandikakamiza kuchita izi, sindinkafuna"

20. Ngati palibe chomwe chikugwira ntchito, thyokani

N’zosavuta kudziimba mlandu komanso kudziona kuti ndife opanda pake tikakhumudwitsidwa ndi munthu amene timamukonda. Komabe, m’pofunika kukumbukira kuti si inu amene muyenera kulakwa pa zochita zawozo komanso kuti muyenera kukuchitirani ulemu ndiponso mokoma mtima. Ngati zinthu zapita patali ndipo palibe kubwerera m'mbuyo, kusiyana ndi wina chikhoza kukhala chinthu chabwino kwambiri. Nazi zifukwa zingapo zochitira izi:

• Kuti mukhale ndi moyo wabwino, ndikofunikira kuti mupitirizebe ngati simungathe kukhululukira zolakwa zomwe adakuchitirani.
• Ngakhale ndizovuta kusankha, zithandiza onse awiri kupeza mtendere
• Osataya chimwemwe chokhalitsa chifukwa cha mpumulo wanthawi yochepa

Ngati amakukondani ndipo amakusamalirani, ayenera kudziimba mlandu ndipo m’kupita kwa nthawi adzazindikira kuti wakutayani ndipo angasinthe umunthu wake. Koma mungatani ngati chibwenzi chanu chikunyalanyazani pambuyo pa vuto limene anayambitsa? Ngati wasiya kufuna kukonza zinthu, ndi bwino kumupanga kukhala bwenzi lanu lakale.

Kuwerenga Kofanana: N'chifukwa Chiyani Kusudzulana Kumakhudza Anyamata Pambuyo pake?

Pomaliza, n’kwachibadwa kumva kuwawidwa mtima n’kupangitsa munthu amene wakukhumudwitsaniyo kudziimba mlandu chifukwa cha zochita zake. Monga tafotokozera pamwambapa, pali njira zingapo zomwe zingakuthandizeni kuthana ndi vutolo ndikuyamba kuchira. Pamapeto pake zili kwa munthuyo kuti atengerepo udindo pazochita zawo ndikukonza, koma malangizowa angakuthandizeni kuthana ndi vutoli ndikupita patsogolo.

Ibibazo

Momwe Mungamupangire Chisoni Kukutengerani Mosasamala

35 Zitsanzo Za Zolemba Zomupangitsa Kuti Azidzimva Wolakwa Pokukhumudwitsani

9 Zizindikiro Zomwe Amanong'oneza Bondo Pokuvulazani

Zopereka zanu sizikupanga zachifundo Mphatso. Zilola kuti Bonobology ipitilize kukubweretserani zidziwitso zatsopano komanso zaposachedwa pakufuna kwathu kuthandiza aliyense padziko lapansi kuphunzira momwe angachitire chilichonse.

Onani Ndondomeko Yathu Yolembera

Kumanani ndi Bungwe Lathu Lowunika

Gawani Ndemanga

Ndemanga zanu ndi zotani?

×

zothandiza Nenani Cholakwika Zina

kugonjera