Mitundu 11 Ya Maubwenzi Osasangalatsa Amene Alipo

Palibe maubwenzi awiri omwe amawoneka ofanana. Mutha kuyika maubwenzi pagulu lalikulu, monga lokhazikika kapena losakhazikika. Koma kodi mumadziwa kuti pali mitundu yosiyanasiyana ya maubwenzi wamba? Posachedwapa, mnzanga wapamtima, Alice, anayamba chibwenzi atangotuluka pachibwenzi. Ndinadzifunsa ngati akufunafuna chibwenzi. Koma nditacheza naye, ndinazindikira kuti panthawiyo sanali womasuka kukhala naye pa ubwenzi wolimba.

Iye anati: “Sindikudziwa kuti ndikuyembekezera chiyani muubwenzi umenewu, koma sindikuona kuti n’kovuta kwambiri, koma ndimangofuna kuti ndikhale pa nthawiyo n’kumakumbukira zimene ndikukumana nazo.” Gulu lathu la atsikana lidazindikira kuti iyi ndi gawo lake laubwenzi wamba, ndipo kuyambira pamenepo, tidayamba kukambirana za ubale wapamtima wa mnzathu.

Kodi Ubale Wamba Ndi Chiyani?

Ubwenzi wamba ungatchedwe kuti si wapayekha, koma sizili choncho nthawi zonse. Mutha kuwona anthu ena pokhapokha ngati m'modzi mwa anthu awiri omwe ali muubwenziwo akupempha chibwenzi chapadera . Ubwenzi wamba umatsatira mfundo izi:

• Chinachake choposa kungolumikizana kapena kuyimirira usiku umodzi
• Chinachake chopanda zilembo za ubale
• Chiyanjano chomwe mumatsata zosangalatsa ndipo simukufuna kukhazikika
• Ubale umene sufuna kudzipereka

Kafukufuku akunena kuti anthu 23% amagwiritsa ntchito mapulogalamu ochezera pa intaneti kuti apeze anthu ogonana nawo mwachisawawa pomwe 20% amapezeka kuti apeze anthu oti agonane nawo mwachisawawa. Maubwenzi oterewa pamapeto pake amakhala mitundu yosiyanasiyana ya maubwenzi wamba omwe nthawi zina amatha kukhala maubwenzi wamba a nthawi yayitali kapena maubwenzi wamba a nthawi yochepa. Ngati mwafika pachizindikiro cha miyezi itatu yaubwenzi ndipo simunalankhulepo za kudzipatula, ndiye kuti mwalowa muubwenzi wamba mwachisawawa.

Mitundu 11 Ya Maubwenzi Osasangalatsa Amene Alipo

Malinga ndi maganizo a anthu okondana okhaokha, anthu omwe amakhala limodzi chifukwa cha chikondi cha thupi lokha ndipo sakufuna chilichonse kwa nthawi yayitali amanenedwa kuti ali muubwenzi wamba. Ngakhale malire a ubale wamba ndi otseguka, funso lalikulu ndilakuti - Kodi mungayembekezere chiyani muubwenzi wamba?

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• Wokondedwa wosakhala yekha yemwe nthawi zambiri amakwaniritsa zosowa zanu zakuthupi zokha
• Sizingakhale zokhuza kugonana, anthu ena amafuna kuti zinthu zisakhale zopepuka popeza atuluka posachedwa pachibwenzi.
• Anthu ocheza nawo wamba angapezenso lingaliro laubwenzi wautali wamba kukhala wosangalatsa komanso wolimbikitsa
• Anthu amene safuna kucheza nawo amafufuzanso zibwenzi zosasangalatsa

Ndi bwalo lalikulu la zibwenzi kunja uko ndipo pali mitundu yosiyanasiyana ya maubwenzi wamba:

1. Kuthamanga kwapamwamba

Ubale waufupi komanso wosakhazikika womwe Emma ndi Adam poyamba ankayembekezera kugawana mufilimuyi, No Strings Attached , ndi womwe mumautcha kuti kugonana kwaufupi. Ndi kugonana kwaufupi komwe simuli ndi udindo pa malingaliro a wina ndi mnzake. Izi sizingaganizidwe ngati ubale waufupi waufupi chifukwa umatenga pafupifupi miyezi iwiri kapena itatu.

2. Ubale wotseguka: kumveka kwa mabwenzi angapo

Masewero ogonana omwe amachititsidwa ndi Anfitriona wa ku Club Paradiso mufilimuyi, More The Merrier , ndi chitsanzo chabwino cha maubwenzi otseguka kumene anthu amaloledwa kugonana ndi anthu omwe si a pachibwenzi chawo. Ngakhale malinga ndi maganizo a anthu ogonana, pakhoza kukhala malamulo ochepa oyambira paubwenzi wotseguka , lingaliro lokhala ndi ufulu wochita zogonana limapangitsa kuti ubalewo ukhale wotseguka.

3. Swinging: kusinthana anthu ogonana nawo

Kugwedezeka si lingaliro lachilendo mumagulu amakono a ubale. Kusinthana/kusinthana kwa zibwenzi pakati pa gulu la anthu (osachepera anayi) ndi imodzi mwa mitundu yosiyanasiyana ya maubwenzi ongoyembekezera.

Malinga ndi maanja omwe adakumanapo ndi kusinthana kwa zibwenzi, mawu omwe amagwiritsidwa ntchito pofotokoza zomwe zinachitikazo ndi akuti, “Kusinthana ndi njira yabwino kwambiri yowonjezerera zinthu .” Ndicho chifukwa chachikulu cha zomwe mungayembekezere muubwenzi wamba ngati uwu.

4. Ubale wanthawi yayitali wamba

Pamenepa, anthu amasankha kukhala pachibwenzi ndipo amagonana kwa nthawi yaitali kwambiri. Mutha kuyitcha khwekhwe kuti mudzaze kufunikira kwa ubale wodzipereka kwakanthawi komwe simunyamula katundu wake koma mumapeza phindu la ubale wodzipereka.

5. Polyamory: kupitirira 'imodzi'

Ndi maubwenzi omwe amakhala ndi maubwenzi okondana komanso kugonana ndi okondedwa angapo nthawi imodzi ndi chilolezo cha onse omwe ali nawo. Ngakhale kuti anthu ambiri amalowa mu polyamory kuti akhale ndi maubwenzi oposa amodzi, nthawi zina zimafunidwa kuti azigonana kwakanthawi kochepa komwe kumachitika kunja kwa ubale woyamba. Izi zimapangitsa kukhala imodzi mwamaubwenzi wamba omwe akuchulukirachulukira masiku ano. Kukonzekera kotereku kumathandizira bwino pama psychology amunthu wamba.

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6. Kutengeka maganizo

Kusokonezeka maganizo ndi pamene anthu amadalirana wina ndi mzake chifukwa cha kukhazikika kwawo m'maganizo. Safuna zosangalatsa zakuthupi kwa wina ndi mzake, komabe pofuna kubweretsa bata m'moyo wawo, amakonda kulankhula zakukhosi kwawo popanda zosefera. Iyi ndi nthawi yaifupi yomwe mumamva kuti muli ndi malingaliro pa wina, pomwe sizili choncho. Uwu ndi mtundu wa ubale womwe susintha kukhala ubale wamba wanthawi yayitali.

7. “Tizisunga momwe zilili” kukhala zamphamvu

Apa, anthu omwe ali muubwenzi sakufuna kusintha muubwenzi wawo chifukwa amaopa kukondana. Ubale wa maubwenzi otere nthawi zambiri umakhala wosiyana ndipo umadalira pazifukwa zogonana. Nthawi zambiri mumamva mawu monga akuti “Ndimakonda komwe tili” kapena “Tiyeni tingosangalala”. Ndi umodzi mwa mitundu ya maubwenzi osakhazikika pomwe okwatirana safuna kubweretsa kudzipereka pachithunzichi ndipo amakhala pamodzi kuti asangalale ndikuthawa moyo.

8. Mabwenzi abwino

Jamie ndi Dylan ankayembekezera kukhala ndi malire muubwenzi wawo mu filimu ya Friends With Benefits . Anasankha kukhala ndi ubwenzi womwe ungaphatikizepo kugonana nthawi ndi nthawi.

Monga momwe m'modzi mwa owerenga athu, Helly, katswiri wa zaluso za malo, ananenera, “ Mabwenzi okhala ndi ubwino ndi lingaliro losavuta ngati simukufuna kutaya mnzanu, koma simungathenso kumuletsa kugonana naye. Limamasula mphaka m'thumba.” Izi zimachokera ku maganizo a ubale wamba pomwe munthu amaopa kutaya mnzake kapena kungofuna kusunga zinthu zosavuta naye.

9. Ubale wa 'kucheza'

Mu mitundu iyi ya maubwenzi wamba, wina alibe ngakhale chibwenzi. Akungocheza basi. Izi, sizikutanthauza kuti ubalewo ukupita kulikonse. Nthawi zambiri anthu akaganiza zongoyenda ndikuyenda, pamakhala mwayi woti mayendedwewo sathera paliponse. Mungakonde kampani ya wina ndi mzake koma ndizo, simukuyembekeza kuti idzasintha kukhala chinthu chokhazikika.

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10. Ubale wopanda chizindikiro

Apa, awiriwa nthawi zambiri samadziwa chomwe angatchule kuti ndi mphamvu zawo. Sangatchulidwe m'magulu amtundu uliwonse ndipo akufuna kuti izi zizikhala choncho. Mitundu yosiyanasiyana ya maubwenzi wamba ikhoza kukhala ndi zilembo, koma apa, anthu awiriwa sali mabwenzi kapena okonda. Iwo ali penapake mu imvi dera pakati pa awiriwo, ndipo munthu sangathe kwenikweni kuika chizindikiro pa izo.

11. Mkhalidwe: kuthawa kwachikale

Ndi lingaliro lokhala ndi moyo panthawiyo ndikusangalala 'kokha', lingaliro la mkhalidwe wabwino ndilakuti mumakonda komwe muli. Pali chikondi chofewa komanso agulugufe, koma mukudziwa kuti izi sizinthu zomwe zingatheke ngakhale kukhala pachibwenzi cha nthawi yayitali. Komabe, mumapitiriza nazo, chifukwa, panthawiyo, zimamveka bwino kwa inu.

Maubwenzi wamba amatha kuwonedwa ngati kuthawa njira yayikulu yachikondi. Koma kumapeto kwa tsiku, aliyense amafunikira wina, wina yemwe angakhale munthu wake - ndipo ndi zomwe anthu amazifuna.

Ibibazo

Chopereka chanu sichikutanthauza chopereka chachifundo . Chidzalola Bonobology kupitiliza kukubweretserani chidziwitso chatsopano komanso chaposachedwa poyesetsa kuthandiza aliyense padziko lonse lapansi kuphunzira momwe angachitire chilichonse.