Momwe Mungadzipezerenso Mu Ubale Pamene Mukumva Kutayika

Kufalitsa chikondi

Anthu nthawi zambiri amaganiza kuti mantha aakulu mu ubale uliwonse ndi mantha otaya wokondedwa wanu. Komabe, zoona zake n’zakuti chowawa kwambiri ndi kudzitaya paubwenzi. Pokonda munthu, nthawi zambiri timayiwala kuti timafunikiranso chikondi. 'Kodi mungapeze bwanji kuti mulinso pachibwenzi?' ndi funso limene anthu ambiri amafuna kulifunsa koma sangakwanitse. Izi zili choncho chifukwa sakhulupirira kuti pali malo oti 'ine' muubwenzi.

Kukonda ena n'kwabwino, koma kodi sikulakwa kusiya chikondi chimenecho pankhani ya zosowa zanu? N’cifukwa ciani mumadziona kuti ndinu wolakwa kapena wodzikonda pamene mwasankha kudziika patsogolo pa zofuna zanu?

Momwe Mungadzipezerenso Mu Ubale - Njira 5 Pamene Mukumva Kutayika

M'ndandanda wazopezekamo

Chifukwa chokha chomwe mukudzitaya mu ubale wanu ndi chifukwa simudziwa kuti chikondi si chinthu chakunja. Ndi chinachake mwa inu. Ndiye, musanayembekeze kuti ena akumwetulirani chikondi, bwanji osangoyamba ndi kudzikonda nokha?

Sitilankhula zodzikonda tokha pamene, kudzikonda nokha ndiyo njira yokhayo yodzipezera kuti ndinu ndani. Kupyolera mu njira zisanu izi, ndikufuna ndikuwonetseni momwe mungapezerenso mu ubale mukamamva ngati mwataya wekha.

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Kuwerenga Kofanana : Momwe Mungathanirane ndi Kusungulumwa Muukwati

1. Dzikondeni nokha

Ngati mukufunadi kudziwa momwe mungabwererenso muubwenzi, onetsetsani kuti mwadzipangira nokha ndi zosowa zanu kukhala zofunika kwambiri. Kuti mudzikonde nokha ndikupezanso nokha, muyenera kuphunzira kusiya kudzitaya muubwenzi womwe umangofuna chikondi osati kukupangitsani kumva kuti mukukondedwa.

Njira yosavuta yodzipezeranso ndikukondana ndi munthu wodabwitsa kwambiri m'moyo wanu - INU! Dzipatseni mwayi kuti mumve momwe chikondi chenicheni chimakhalira. Chikondi chopanda malire komanso chopanda zovuta zilizonse.

Yambani pang'ono, mwina mwa kukhazikitsa chizolowezi chatsopano chomwe chimakupatsani mwayi wolumikizananso ndi inu nokha. Khalani ndi zokonda zatsopano kapena maphunziro omwe amakugwirizanitsani ndi umunthu wanu wamkati. Khalani ndi chizolowezi chochita zinthu zomwe zimakusangalatsani.

Kwa mphindi 10 patsiku, onetsetsani kuti simukuganizira za wina aliyense koma nokha komanso zomwe mukufuna. Zochita zazing'onozi zikuwonetsani zomwe mukuphonya, ndi 'mmene mungapezerenso nokha'. Mudzayamba kuzindikira kuti ndinu ndani.

Kudzitaya mu ubale — Kudzitaya Nokha Mu Ubale

2. Kambiranani zimenezo

Posachedwapa, mnzanga David anandiuza kuti akudzimva kuti watayika muubwenzi wake wazaka 8. Kudzipereka kwa munthu kwa zaka zisanu ndi zitatu ndizodabwitsa, koma kudzitaya paubwenzi kumakhala kowawa kwambiri.

David anati, “Ndikumva ngati ndadzitaya pang'onopang'ono pazaka zambiri, ndipo tsopano ndilibe njira yodzipezeranso ndekha.” Zinali zopweteka kwambiri kumva mawu awa, koma kenako zinandikhudza. Sindinali ine amene David ayenera kukambirana naye izi. Mafunso okhudza ubale ndi nkhani ngati izi ziyenera kukambidwa ndi mnzanu osati munthu wachitatu.

Ngakhale zikuwoneka zovuta bwanji, kuuza mnzanuyo zoona za momwe mukumvera ndi njira yokhayo yomwe mungamvetsetse momwe mungapezerenso. Kuwauza kuti simukudzimva ngati inu posachedwapa ndipo mukufuna kuyesetsa kuti mupezenso nokha, zidzapangitsa kuti ntchitoyi ikhale yosavuta.

Ngati amakuderani nkhawa, adzakuthandizani paulendo wodzipezanso. Chifukwa chake, tulukani m'malo anu otonthoza ndikuyika malingaliro anu patsogolo pawo. Ndani akudziwa, mwina nawonso ali ndi malingaliro omwewo.

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3. Lumikizananinso ndi achibale anu komanso anzanu

Kudziwa momwe mungadzipezere nokha kudzafuna kuti mudziwe kuti ndinu ndani. Kudzipereka kwambiri muubwenzi kungakupangitseni kumva kuti simukugwirizana ndi ena m'moyo wanu. Chifukwa chake, paulendo wanu wopezanso nokha, muyenera kupeza njira yocheza ndi anthu ochokera mbali zonse za moyo wanu.

Pitilizani maulendo ataliatali ndi maulendo ndi anzanu omwe anali osangalatsa kwambiri kwa inu wapadera uja asanabwere m'moyo wanu. Fotokozerani zokumbukira zaubwana wanu ndi banja lanu popita kutchuthi kapena kukonza masewera abanja kunyumba kwanu.

Chitani zonse zomwe mumachita musanalowe pachibwenzi ndi okondedwa wanu. Lumikizananinso ndi anthu omwe adakudziwani kale ndikudzikumbutsani za dziko lomwe liri kunja kwa ubale wanu. Kumbukirani, mukakhazikitsa cholinga chanu momveka bwino ndikunena mokweza kuti, "Ndikufuna kudzipezanso," mudzazindikira chilichonse komanso aliyense wozungulirani akuthandizira paulendowu mwanjira ina.

4. Apatseni ufulu wanu

Ntchito yanu yokondana yakhala yosamalizidwa kwa miyezi ingapo kapena zaka zambiri. Izi zitha kukhala chifukwa chakuti mwakhala mukuthandiza mnzanu pa chilichonse chomwe amachita. Simunakhale ndi nthawi yokhala pansi ndikugwirizananso ndi maloto ndi zolinga zanu, koma mumaonetsetsa kuti mukukhala ndi nthawi yabwino ndi mnzanuyo kuti ubale wanu usawonongeke.

Ngati mungagwirizane ndi izi, ndikukhulupirira kuti mukudzitaya paubwenzi ndikunyalanyaza moyo womwe munkakhulupirira kuti mungakhale nawo. Kuyima mwamphamvu ndi wokondedwa wanu ndikwabwino, koma kuyiwala zolinga zanu ndi maloto anu pamtengo wa mnzanu ndi chinthu chodetsa nkhawa.

Ndikofunika kumvetsetsa kuti sikuli bwino kudzitaya nokha pamene mukuyesera kukhala chirichonse kwa aliyense. Ngati mumadzipeza mukufuna kudzipeza nthawi zonse muli pachibwenzi, kapena ngati zakhala zikuchitika mobwerezabwereza mu ubale womwewo, zikutanthauza kuti mumachotsa ufulu wanu kuti musangalatse ena.

Vuto likuwoneka ngati inu, ndipo muyenera kukumba mozama. Muyenera kudziwa kuti zonse zili m'manja mwanu ndipo nthawi zina, mumangofunika kubweza zomwe zili zanu. Lekani kuchepetsa moyo wanu kwa wokondedwa wanu ndi ubale wanu. Wonjezerani malingaliro anu ndikuyesetsa kukwaniritsa maloto omwe mudadziwonera nokha.

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5. Funsani mphunzitsi wa moyo

Kudzipeza mobwerezabwereza m'maubwenzi omwe kale ankandichotsera umunthu wanga kunali kukulirakulira. Sindinadziwe choti ndichite. Pomwepo, ndidakumana ndi zotsatsa pazama TV pomwe mphunzitsi wina wa moyo adati akuphunzitsa momwe mungadzipezerenso mutatayika, kudzera m'magawo ophunzitsira moyo.

Poyamba ndinali wokayikira, koma ndikhulupirireni, chimenecho chinali chimodzi mwazosankha zabwino kwambiri pamoyo wanga! Kuti mudziwe momwe mungapezerenso nokha, muyenera kudziwa zazinthu zomwe zilipo kwa inu kunja uko. Pamene mukumva kuti mwatayika, lingaliro lopanda tsankho lochokera kwa akatswiri oyenerera likhoza kuchita zodabwitsa.

Zomwe ndakumana nazo zandiphunzitsa kuti chifukwa china chomwe ndimamva ngati ndataya chibwenzi ndi chifukwa chosowa chithandizo chofunikira kuchokera kwa abale anga ndi anzanga. Ndipo mwina, vuto lanunso ndi limenelo.

Wothandizira moyo amaphunzitsidwa kuti azisanthula momwe zinthu zilili ndikupereka zidziwitso zabwino kwambiri zamomwe mungakwaniritsire cholinga chanu. Atha kukuthandizani kukhazikitsa zolinga ndi zolinga zenizeni, ndikuwongolerani kuti musinthe masomphenyawa kukhala owona. Ndi chitsogozo ichi, yankho la funso lanu, "Kodi mungapeze bwanji nokha?" zingawoneke zosavuta.

Ndikukhulupirira kuti njira 5zi zikuthandizani kuti mupezenso nokha pamene mukumva kuti mwatayika. Chinsinsi kupeza nokha kachiwiri mu ubwenzi ndi kuzindikira kuti simuyenera kusiya umunthu wanu kuti kukhala bwenzi abwino kwa munthu. Ubale wanu ndi gawo la moyo wanu osati moyo wanu wonse.

Ngati inu, kapena munthu amene mumamudziwa, mukukumana ndi vuto lofanana ndi limeneli, sungani nthawi yokumana ndi katswiri wodziwa bwino ntchito amene angakuthandizeni. Mutha kuwona tsamba lathu la alangizi pa Bonobology.co.com ndikusunga nthawi yokumana ndi katswiri wathu wodziwa bwino ntchito. Chifukwa pamapeto pake, chinthu chokhacho chofunikira ndi inu.

Ibibazo

1. Kodi mungatani kuti mubwererenso muubwenzi wosweka?

Kuwala pang'ono kumatha kukhala moto wobangula mkati mwa masekondi. Choncho, musachepetse mphamvu yobwezeretsanso maubwenzi osweka. Ngati ubwenzi wanu wafika poti nonse mumakangana mosalekeza ndipo simukukhulupirirananso, ndiye kuti mwina zonse zomwe mukufunikira ndi kungoyambira pang'ono. Mungachite zimenezi polankhula mochepa komanso kumvetsera kwambiri zimene mnzanuyo akufuna kunena. Kuti mupewe mikangano m'tsogolomu, mutha kukhala pansi ndikukhazikitsa malamulo oyambira. Kuyesetsa kuwonjezera chisangalalo ndi ubwenzi mu ubale wanu kungakuthandizeni kuyatsanso motowo.

2. N’chifukwa chiyani ndimadzitaya pakati pa anthu?

Ngati ndinu munthu amene amakhulupirira kuti kudziwika kwanu kumasankhidwa ndi anthu omwe akuzungulirani, ndiye kuti pali mwayi waukulu kuti mumadzitaya nokha pafupi ndi anthu. Ngati mukuwona kuti umunthu wanu ukutchulidwa kunja, mumayika patsogolo ubale wanu ndi ena kuposa china chilichonse. Kuti mupewe izi, muyenera kusintha kawonedwe kanu kuchokera kudziko lakunja kupita kumkati mwanu. Khalani ndi nthawi yanu ndikupeza zomwe mukufuna. Ganizirani za mmene mumadzionera, ndipo yesani kupenda umunthu wanu popanda kuganizira maganizo a ena.

3. Kodi ndimakhala bwanji moyo wanga pachibwenzi?

Kukhala moyo wanu, momwe mumafunira nthawi zonse, ndizotheka ngakhale mutakhala pachibwenzi. Kuphunzira kuzindikira malingaliro anu, kupitirizabe kuyesetsa kukwaniritsa zolinga zanu ndi chilakolako chanu, kuphunzira kudzikonda nokha, ndikuchita zinthu zina nokha ndi zina mwa njira zambiri zomwe zingakulepheretseni kudzitaya paubwenzi. Kupatula apo, kugwiritsa ntchito nthawi yanu pazinthu zina zatsopano kapena zokonda kungakuthandizeni kukula ngati munthu payekha, ndipo kungakuthandizeni kuti muyanjanenso ndi inu nokha komanso zomwe mwapeza.

Zizindikiro 7 Zodzida Zomwe Zikuwononga Ubale Wanu

Chopereka chanu sichikutanthauza chopereka chachifundo . Chidzalola Bonobology kupitiliza kukubweretserani chidziwitso chatsopano komanso chaposachedwa poyesetsa kuthandiza aliyense padziko lonse lapansi kuphunzira momwe angachitire chilichonse.