Mayankho athu ndi chikhalidwe chathu paubwenzi, chikondi ndi maubwenzi nthawi zambiri zimakhala zochokera ku zizolowezi zomwe tidapanga tili achichepere. Chifukwa chake, modabwitsa momwe zimamvekera, kulumikizana kodziletsa ndi njira yolakwika yachitukuko yomwe mwina adayamba kuyikulitsa ali mwana osazindikira.
Ngati ndinu okondana kwambiri, khalani ndi 'Man of Steel' pamene kupatukana kukugundani kapena kukhala ndi malingaliro oti mukhale pachibwenzi kwathunthu - mwina zimakhudza kwambiri ubwana wanu kuposa momwe mukuganizira. Mwina nthawi zonse mumathawa maubwenzi chifukwa simunakumanepo ndi abwino pamene mukukula. Kapena ndinu okondana opanda chiyembekezo chifukwa mudakhala nthawi yochulukirapo ndikuwonera ma rom-coms ndi amayi anu mutatha kusewera mpira.
Izi zikunenedwa, mwanjira yofananayo, munthu amapanga masitayelo omangika kwa anthu potengera zomwe adaphunzira zaka zawo zakubadwa. Kupewa kulumikizidwa ndi chimodzi mwa izo. Ngakhale ochiritsa nthawi zambiri amafufuza momwe amalumikizirana ndi anthu akamacheza ndi maanja panthawi ya upangiri kuti aulule zomwe zimawapangitsa kukhala momwe alili. Koma kodi kalembedwe kameneka ndi kotani kwenikweni ndipo chifukwa chiyani padziko lapansi kumveka kowopsa kwambiri? Tiyeni tifufuze.
Makhalidwe Omangirira Ubale
M'ndandanda wazopezekamo
Njira zomangira ubale zidapangidwa pomvetsetsa momwe mwana amayankhira kwa omwe amawasamalira. Maphunziro ambiri okhudza masitayelo ophatikizika adakhazikitsidwa payankho lalikulu la mwana kwa makolo awo. Chifukwa chake, chikhalidwe chathu kwa anthu ena ndi chotulukapo chachikulu cha ubale wathu ndi makolo athu.
Ndipotu, pali zotsatira zachindunji za kukondana mu zochita zathu za tsiku ndi tsiku. Tsopano tili ndi njira zinayi zokondana zomwe tingakhazikitsire zizolowezi zathu. Njira yopewera kukondana ndi imodzi mwa njira zinayi zokondana. Zina zonse ndi zotetezeka, za nkhawa komanso zamantha.
Pewani kugwirizana
Munthu amene amapewa kukondana ndi ena amasankha ufulu kuposa chikondi ndi ubale tsiku lililonse. Safuna kukhala pafupi kwambiri ndi wina aliyense ndipo amaopa kudalira ena. Angawoneke ngati osangalala kunja, akuoneka ngati anabadwira kukhala osakwatira , koma kwenikweni, ali ndi mantha mkati.
Mantha kupewa ubwenzi
Ubwenzi wamantha wopeŵa kumapangitsa munthu kukhala wosatetezeka ndi mantha kukondedwa. Salabadira bwino mawu achikondi ndipo amawopsezedwa mwachangu. Poopa kuvulazidwa, siziwatengera nthawi yayitali kuti amve mabelu a alamu ndikuthamangira mbali ina.
Nkhawa ubwenzi
Anthu omwe ali ndi nkhawa nthawi zambiri amaganizira kwambiri za ubale wawo, koma mkati mwake, amakhala ndi chikhumbo chachikulu chokhala pafupi ndi bwenzi lawo. Iwo amafuna kugwiritsitsa kwa winawake mmene angathere. Komabe, amawopa kusiyidwa mofanana ndi amene ali ndi mantha opeŵa.
Chitetezo cholumikizidwa
Kukondana kotetezeka ndi chinthu chodziwika bwino kwambiri, chomwe chimasangalala ndi ufulu wake komanso kudziyimira pawokha muubwenzi. Ngakhale kuti amasunga umunthu wawo, amathabe kupanga ubale wokhalitsa ndipo sawonetsa zizindikiro za kuopa kudzipereka.
Kupewa Zoyambitsa Kumangirira
Makolo ndiwo amawunikira momwe masitayelo okondana amakulira mwa munthu. Kukonda munthu wodziletsa kumatha kukhala mdima pang'ono, chifukwa munthu yemwe ali ndi kalembedwe kameneka analibe zofunikira pakulera ndi chisamaliro chomwe amafunikira ali mwana.
Pamene wopereka chithandizo sakuyankha, kholo losasamala, losakhalapo kapena losasamala - mwana angayambe kusonyeza zizindikiro za kupewa kudzikonda. Izi zimayambitsa nkhawa ndi chisoni chachikulu mkati mwake, zomwe zimamupangitsanso kudzidalira. Masiku ano, pafupifupi 30% ya anthu amasonyeza njira zopewera kudzikonda tsiku ndi tsiku. Nazi zina mwa zinthu zomwe makolo angachite modziwa kapena mosadziwa kuti ayambe kudzikonda mwana wawo akakula.
- Kunyalanyaza: Zingayambe ndi chinthu chophweka monga kusafunsa mwana wa tsiku lake kuti amusiye yekha kwa maola ambiri
- Kusatengera zovuta za mwana: Kuwafunsa kuti 'akule' kapena kukhwima ndi chimodzi mwa zazikulu kwambiri zolakwa za makolo. M’malo mowaphunzitsa njira yothandiza yothanirana ndi mavuto awo, khololo limanyalanyaza nkhaŵa zilizonse
- Kusanyalanyaza zosowa za zakudya ndi zachipatala: Kusadetsa nkhaŵa thanzi la mwana m’zakudya kapena kunyalanyaza matenda awo akuthupi
- Kupanda matamando: Kusasirira zimene mwana wachita bwino kapena kumulimbikitsa mokwanira kungachititse kuti azidziona ngati kuti sangakwanitse. Kutsimikizira ana ndikofunikira kuti akhale otetezeka
- Kuletsa chikondi: Chikondi chakuthupi chimathandiza kwambiri kupangitsa mwana kudzimva kukhala wosungika ndi wosamalidwa. Makolo akamakana kukumbatirana, kumpsompsona kapena kukumbatirana - mwanayo akhoza kusonyeza zizindikiro za kusakondana.
Kuwerenga Kofanana: Momwe Kukhala Bambo Kunasinthira Moyo Wanga Kukhala Wabwino
Zizindikiro za Kupewa Kuphatikizika
Komanso, njira yopewera 'kusadzidalira', chibwenzi ndi munthu amene ali ndi chikondi chopewera chingawononge ubale wanu mwachangu. Chinsinsi chawo, makoma awo, komanso kukana kwawo kukondana zinthu zitha kukhala zochititsa mantha kwa munthu winayo. Ngakhale kuti ndi okongola komanso okongola pa chibwenzi chawo chonse, amawoneka okonzeka kukhala pachibwenzi komanso amawoneka odalirika komanso okhulupirika - mwina sangakupatse chitetezo chomwe mukufuna muubwenzi wokhalitsa.
Popeza kuti iwowo sanakhalepo ndi chitonthozo chimene munthu amapeza akakhala paubwenzi wabwino, iwo sadziŵa mmene angachiperekere kwa wina. Mwina mumawakonda ndipo mungafune kuwachezera kunyumba. Koma mukaliza belu ndikudikirira pakhonde, zimakhala ngati palibe amene amatsegula chitseko.
Kwa munthu amene wakula ndi zovuta zomwe zakhalapo kwa nthawi yayitali, zomwe pambuyo pake zimawonekera ngati zovuta zopewera kulumikizana, kuthana ndi ubale kumakhala kovuta kwa iwonso. Tsopano ngati muli pachibwenzi ndi munthu amene ali ndi ubale woterewu, werengani pansipa. Nazi njira zingapo zomwe mgwirizano wopewera umagwirira ntchito.
1. Sadziwa kukonda
Musanyengedwe ndi matsenga awo ndi zithumwa zawo. Kunja kwawo kolimba sikumawonetsa kuti mkati mwake mulibe kanthu. Angawoneke ngati akudziyendetsa bwino kwambiri, koma chifukwa chakuti adaphunzira luso lodzidalira ali aang'ono kwambiri. Izi zawapangitsa kukhala olimba kuposa momwe mungaganizire, koma mkati mwake, amawopa kuvulazidwa nthawi zonse.
Kotero, pamene wina achita nawo chibwenzi, angamve ngati ali ndi zopinga zambiri mwadzidzidzi. Kuchokera momwe amasinthira kuyang'ana kwawo ku momwe samawulula chilichonse chokhudza iwo eni, zitha kukhala zovuta kuchita nawo. Popeza sadziwa kusamaliridwa, sanaphunzirepo momwe angachitire okha.
2. Amatha kuwotcha ndi kuwomba mozizira
Mphindi imodzi amaoneka ngati akuyang'ana kwambiri inuyo ndipo nthawi yotsatira, amachoka ndikuyamba kucheza ndi mnzanu wakale. Kungoti sakonda kusonyeza chikondi sikutanthauza kuti mtima wawo ndi wopanda kanthu. Amakondana kwambiri ndipo mantha awo sachotsa kuwona mtima m'malingaliro awo, koma zimakhala zosavuta kuwamvetsa molakwika.
Pamene ali pachibwenzi chachikulu, machitidwe awo nthawi zambiri amakhala osokoneza komanso okhumudwitsa nthawi zina. Iwo mwina amafuna kuthera mphindi iliyonse akadzuka ndi inu, koma mwadzidzidzi manyazi ndi kuyamba kutsuka mbale mwamphamvu pamene inu muwafunsa funso laumwini.
3. Munthu amene ali ndi chibwenzi chodziletsa angaganize kuti ndiwe wokakamira
Timati kukana chifukwa tikutanthauzadi. Kulabadira chikondi sikunakhalepo mwayi wawo kapenanso chinthu chomwe amasangalala nacho pankhaniyi. Chifukwa chake, mukawapatsa, mawonekedwe awo achilengedwe ndikungotaya. Izi sizimabwera chifukwa cha kusowa chikondi, koma makamaka chifukwa chosadziwa choti achite. Muyenera kukumbukira kuti mukuchita ndi munthu amene wakula ndi chilakolako chothawa.
Motero, zinthu monga PDA, kupsompsonana kokoma pamphumi, zala zolumikizana pamene mukugwirana manja , izi sizinthu zomwe zimawalimbikitsa. Pakapita nthawi, angaphunzire kufunika kwawo ndikuyamikira kumverera kosangalatsa kwa ubwenzi, koma mungayembekezere kuti achite mantha ngati mutawakakamiza kuti akupsompsoneni pakati pa malo ogulitsira.
4. Sali bwino kuthetsa mikangano
Kuthetsa mikangano kumafuna ntchito ndipo si vuto losavuta lomwe limafuna mafuta odzola usiku wonse. Limafunika chisamaliro, chisamaliro ndi chikondi - zinthu zomwe anthu omwe ali ndi chikondi chodziletsa amazolowera kuziletsa. Ichi ndichifukwa chake, mukayamba kukakamiza nkhawa yomwe ikukuvutitsani, madandaulo anu sangamveke.
Sikuti sakulemekezani, koma amalephera kuona nkhaniyo. Mutha kunena zinthu monga, "Mwakhala kutali sabata yonse - simunandiyimbirepo kamodzi!", Ndipo sangadziwe momwe angayankhire. Kutengeka mtima sikungobwera mwachibadwa kwa iwo kotero yembekezerani kuwapeza osowa pokhala mukamawauza nkhawazi.
5. Anthu omwe ali ndi chizolowezi chopewa amakhala ndi vuto lalikulu lokhulupirirana
Ndipo amadziulula m’njira zosiyanasiyana. Mnzanuyo atha kukudalirani chifukwa ndi zomwe zimafunika kuti mukhale paubwenzi wabwino. Kusankha ubale pamene kukhala kupewa ubwenzi nkhani ndi palokha, lalikulu zambiri ndipo zimatengera wodalirika kuchuluka kwa chikhulupiriro kuchokera mbali yawo. Koma nthawi zina, musayembekezere kuti azicheza ndi anthu mosavuta ngati mmene anachitira ndi inu.
Zokhumudwitsa paubwana wawo zawapangitsa kudziona kukhala opanda chitetezo ndi opanda chochita. Owasamalira awo oyambirira alephera zonse zimene ankayembekezera. Chifukwa chake, kunja kwawo kolimba kumatuluka mowonekera pomwe akuvutitsidwa kwanthawi zonse ndi lingaliro lakuvulazidwanso.
6. Zimatenga nthawi kuti avomereze ubale wanthawi yayitali
Chifukwa chakuti zoyambitsa ubale wawo ndizochuluka, kupeza zifukwa zosiya chibwenzi kumabwera mosavuta kwa iwo. Ndipotu, nthawi zonse amafunafuna zifukwa zambiri zochoka kusiyana ndi kukhala. Popewa kudzipereka, zimakhala zovuta kuchita kudzipereka, chifukwa pakudzipereka, muyenera kupereka zonse.
Ichi ndichifukwa chake kukumana mwachisawawa, kugona usiku umodzi komanso kukumana popanda zingwe ndizomwe zimawapangitsa kukhala otanganidwa kwambiri pankhani ya chibwenzi. Amakonda anthu omwe amatha kusunga mtunda wamaganizo komanso kukhala odziyimira pawokha.
7. Ngakhale mutakhala paubwenzi wovuta kwambiri, sangakufunseni thandizo
Maziko enieni a maubwenzi ndikupeza wina yemwe angakugwirizireni ambulera mvula. Choncho, pamene wina wakula pafupi ndi munthu wina ndipo inu nonse muli pachibwenzi chachikulu, mukuyembekeza kuti adzakufikirani pamasiku okhumudwa kwambiri.
Koma iwo sadzatero. Nthawi zonse amapukuta misozi paokha ndipo samafunikira kuti muwapatse bokosi la minofu. Chifukwa chake, mutha kulimbana ndi dzino ndi misomali kuyesa kugwetsa makoma awo, ndikuyembekeza kuti akuwonetseni mbali ya iwo yomwe simunayiwonepo - koma kulimbana kumeneko kudzakhala kotalika komanso kovutirapo.
8. Kudziimira kwawo kumawonekera nthawi zonse
Ndipo nthawi zina m'njira zokongola kwambiri. Osati kokha kuntchito kapena pachibwenzi. Koma inu mudzaziwona izo mu inchi iliyonse ya umunthu wawo, momwe iwo aliri odzidalira okha. Iwo sakhala ndi zotupa mumdima, chifukwa iwo amamasuka mmenemo. Ndiponso saopa kulasidwa ndi minga, chifukwa ndi odziwa kumanga mabandeji.
Kuyambira mmene amaganizira zinthu m'maganizo mwawo akamaphika khofi mpaka momwe amachitira ndi mavuto kuntchito, mumakhala mukucheza ndi mkazi kapena mwamuna wodziimira paokha pamene muli paubwenzi wopewera kukondana.
Kupewa Ndi Kuchiza Kwa Njira Yopewera Kumangirira
Popeza kuti njira yopewera kuphatikizika imayamba kuyambira paubwana, kupewa kwake kuyenera kuyambikanso komweko. Mchitidwe wokondera umenewu uyenera kuchita makamaka ndi unansi wa munthu ndi makolo ake. Njira yokhayo yolepheretsera mwana kukulitsa izi, ndikukhala kholo lokhudzidwa ndi lomvetsera kwa iwo.
Ngati kholo limaganizira zosowa za mwana wake, limamulola kumva malingaliro ake onse komanso limamusamalira, zimenezo zingakhale zokwanira kuti apewe njira imeneyi yolumikizirana. M'malo modzudzula kapena kudzudzula mwana kwambiri, kholo liyenera kuganizira zomulera ndi mawu abwino komanso kumvetsetsa. Ngati sichoncho, n'zotheka kuti mwanayo ali ndi makolo oopsa ndipo mosakayikira adzakhala ndi njira zothanirana ndi mavuto mtsogolo.
Komanso, njira yokhayo yodziwira kuti muli ndi njira yolumikizirana ndi anthu ena ndi kupita kwa mlangizi kapena katswiri wa zamaganizo ndikutsatira malangizo awo. Ndi luso lawo, munthu angadziwe komwe vutoli likuchokera komanso momwe angalithetsere kuti akonze ubale wamtsogolo. Mwamwayi, Bonobology ili ndi gulu la alangizi aluso omwe ali pafupi nanu.
Ndiye inu mukupita. Umo ndi momwe zimakhalira - kukonda munthu wodzipewa. Sitingathe kusankha amene tingagwere, koma tingasankhe kuyesa kuwamvetsetsa bwino kuti tiwakonde m’njira yoyenera. Zitha kuwoneka ngati chinthu chovuta kuchita komanso ngati kubetcha koyipa kwambiri.
Koma popeza simungakane chikondi chotero, mutha kuchipanga kukhala chabwinoko pang'ono.
Ibibazo
Wopewa sasonyeza chikondi m’njira yofala. Mudzawawona akudziyimira pawokha komanso akuopa kudzipereka. Mwina amakukondani, koma sanganene bwino chifukwa salankhula kwambiri zakukhosi kwawo.
Osati monumentally. Ndi chithandizo ndi upangiri, munthu atha kuthana ndi vuto lawo lodziletsa ndikuphunzira momwe angakhalire paubwenzi wabwino kwambiri. Komabe, munthu sangalekeretu chilichonse chomwe chinathandizira kupanga chilengedwe chawo.
Potsirizira pake, inde. Pakhoza kukhala zovuta zingapo panjira ndi mikangano ina yayikulu kumayambiriro kwaubwenzi ndi munthu yemwe ali ndi vuto lopewa kulumikizana. Koma ndi nthawi, kusasinthasintha, khama ndi matani omvetsetsa, ubale wabwino ndi wotheka.
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