Izinhlobo Eziyi-15 Zezimo Nezimpawu Zazo

Ake ucabange ngalokhu: Ngeke ukwazi ukukuzwisa ubuhlungu obumntshontshele uma umbuka noma osebenza naye osuvele waxhumana naye ngobhiya othile. Futhi ugcina unesikhathi esimnandi nabo, kaninginingi, uze ungabonakali uphuma ku-joyride emnandi. Noma, i-ex yakho ilokhu ibuyela kuwe ngezikhathi ezithile futhi ulokhu usondelana nayo njalo lapho ibuya. Lezi akuzona nje izigaba ezidlulayo kodwa ezinye zezinhlobo zezimo ezihlaba umxhwele kakhulu.

Lezi zimo zingaba mnandi kakhulu kuze kube yilapho abantu abathintekayo besekhasini elifanayo. Kodwa uma umuntu oyedwa eba nemizwa (futhi omunye evame ukuba nayo), izinto zingase zimapeketwane maduzane. Okubi kakhulu ukuthi, ungase ube nobunzima bokwenza umqondo wokuthi yini obhekene nayo. Ngakho-ke, uma uke waba sesimeni sothando noma isimo somngane-ne-izinzuzo kodwa udidekile mayelana nokuthi empeleni usesimweni esibucayi, lesi sihloko ngeyakho. Funda ukuze uthole ukubuka kabanzi kwezinhlobo ezahlukene zezimo nezimpawu zazo.

Yini Ethathwa Njengesimo?

Ngaphambi kokuthi singene ezinhlotsheni ezahlukene ze-situationships, ake sibheke incazelo ye-situationship . Njengoba i-dynamics ishintshashintsha, ayikho incazelo eqinile ye-situationship. Mhlawumbe ubuhlobo ongeke ukwazi ukubuchaza noma ukububeka ilebula. Ezinye izici zivamile kuzo zonke i-situationships, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi ziluhlobo luni:

• Esimeni, abantu ababili bangaba nobungane, ubulili, noma ngokujulile othandweni, kodwa akuzona izithandani
• Ngokungafani nobudlelwano, azikho izibopho lapha futhi ozakwethu bangakhetha ukukhululeka noma ukuzibophezela ngendlela abafisa ngayo
• Izimo zingaqedwa ngokuluhlaza, ngokungafani nobudlelwano, lapho kulindeleke ukuthi umuntu anikeze ukuvala
• Ngaphandle kokungaqiniseki, izimo zinikeza umuzwa wenduduzo, futhi kwezinye izimo, ukukhululeka ngokomzwelo nangokomzimba nakho
• Esikhathini samanje, lapho abantu abaningi bengenaso isikhathi noma amandla okuthola imizwa yabo noma ukuba sebudlelwaneni bangempela, izimo ziba indawo ephephile lapho ingekho imibuzo ebuzwayo futhi kungekho zintambo ezinamathiselwe.

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Izinhlobo Eziyi-15 Zezimo Nezimpawu Zazo

Kule nkathi yamagama nemibono yobudlelwano obushintshashintshayo, izimo nazo zinikeza izinhlobo eziningi. Kodwa-ke, zivame ukuqala futhi ziphele ngokungahleliwe. Kwabambalwa abanenhlanhla, izimo ezinjalo zingaqhubeka isikhathi eside futhi ziphenduke ubungane bangempela noma ubudlelwano bothando . Futhi qagela ukuthini, ungase ube sesimweni esithile, ungaqapheli.

Ingabe unaye umngane ogcina uthandana naye ngemva kobusuku bephathi? Noma umuntu osebenza naye osusondelene izikhathi ezingaphezu kwesisodwa kodwa kuphelele lapho? Awu, asizange yini sonke sibe nobudlelwane obunjalo nemingcele efiphele? Zivame ukwenzeka, ngokuvamile lapho singafuni lutho. Kepha lezi zixhumanisi zifaneleka nini njengesimo? Ukukusiza ukuthi uthole impendulo, nazi izinhlobo ezijwayelekile zezimo nezimpawu zazo okufanele uzibheke:

1. Isimo sebanga elide

Esimeni esikude, abantu ababili abahlukaniswe ibangana bangase bangabi sebudlelwaneni obusemthethweni kodwa bangase babe nemizwa ngomunye nomunye.

Izimpawu zesimo sebanga elide

Izimo ezinjalo zingaba nzima ngokomzwelo, njengoba bobabili abalingani bangase babe nokulindela okuthile okungenakufezeka ngenxa yebanga eliphakathi kwabo. Uyazi ukuthi usebudlelwaneni obude uma:

• Uhlala emadolobheni ahlukene noma emazweni kodwa unezingxoxo ezijulile njalo ngocingo, umbhalo, namakholi wevidiyo
• Ninesibopho esiqinile kodwa nobabili niyasaba ukutshala imali kuso ngokomzwelo ngenxa yokwesaba ukuthi kungase kungasebenzi ngenxa yebanga. 
• Ungase ube nezikhathi zokusondelana, noma kunjalo 

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2. Abangane abanezinzuzo

Njengoba idume kakhulu nguMila Kunis noJustin Timberlake kwifilimu edumile yaseHollywood enegama elifanayo, i-friends with benefits ingumqondo wokuthi i-Gen-Z ayiyona into engaziwa. Ucansi luyisidingo esiyisisekelo, futhi kungokwemvelo ukuthi abantu bafune ukwanelisa lesi sifiso ngisho noma bengenaye umuntu okhethekile empilweni yabo.

Izimpawu zabangane abanezinzuzo zesimo

Abantu abasezimeni ezinjalo bathola ukufinyelela kalula ocansini ngaphandle kwezinkinga zokuba umbhangqwana. Kodwa kungaphezu kobudlelwano be-ONS. Nakuba kungase kuzwakale kukuhle, lesi simo singaba sibi uma umuntu oyedwa eqala ukulwela omunye. Kungase kugcine sekuphelile ebunganeni kanye nasekudabukeni kwenhliziyo. 

Umsebenzisi we-Reddit , oke waba sesimweni sokungathembeki, uthi, “Sasihlangana kuphela ukuze senze ucansi futhi lapho ngifuna ukwenza eminye imisebenzi, wayeyilahla ngoba wayengafuni ukwenza sengathi sishadile. Wayengatholakali ngokomzwelo ngokuphelele. Ukuxhumana ngokwako kwakunamandla, kunamandla futhi kuhambisana ngokomzimba”

Ngakho-ke, nazi ezinye izimpawu zabangani abanezimo zezinzuzo:

• Isimo sakho sidlulela ocansini nasecansini kuphela. Akukho ukuzibophezela, akukho umona, kumnandi kuphela
• Kukhona i-chemistry edakayo kodwa alikho ikusasa ngale kombhede
• Ningabangane emini futhi ningabangane bocansi ebusuku
• Uyabathanda kodwa hhayi ngaphezu kwanoma yimuphi omunye umngane
• Ningaba lapho ninobabili ezikhathini ezinzima kodwa bobabili abafisi ukukuyisa kwelinye izinga noma ukuzibophezela ebudlelwaneni nomunye nomunye

3. Isimo sokudakwa

Utshwala baziwa ngokuvinjelwa okuphansi, okungaveza izinhlangothi zobuntu bakho ngokuvamile esizibambile. Nakuba abanye abantu bebanga umsindo futhi benomsindo lapho bedakiwe, abanye baba nenkanuko. Futhi, yingakho kuqala ubungane obudakiwe nomngane, osebenza naye, noma owake waphila. Lokhu kuvame ukubizwa ngephutha uma abantu besangulukile. 

Izimpawu zesimo esidakiwe

Kunezici ezithile ezivamile kuzo zonke izimo zokudakwa. Nazi ezinye izimpawu zezimo ezinjalo:

• Ezikhathini eziningi, okuwukuphela kwesikhathi enihlangana ngaso kulapho nina (noma nobabili) nidakiwe
• Isimo ngokuvamile siyashintsha phakathi kwemiyalezo yocansi edakiwe kanye nocansi oludakiwe
• Ungase futhi ubathululele inhliziyo yakho lapho wehla
• Kungaba umuntu ojwayelene naye, umngane, noma othile okukhangayo, ngaphandle kwanoma ibuphi ubudlelwano bothando
• Ungakwazi futhi ukungena esimweni sokudakwa nomuntu ongamazi ngenkathi usohambweni. Kuleso simo, kungase kuholele ku- an Ubudlelwano be-ONS

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4. Isimo se-rebound

Ngakho-ke, usanda kuphuma ebudlelwaneni futhi manje uphuthelwa ukuxhumana owabelana ngakho nowakwakho wangaphambili. Siyaqonda! Sonke sidlule ebuhlotsheni obuphindaphindwayo esigabeni esithile sempilo, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi izimo ezinjalo ezinobuthi zisithinta kanjani kamuva empilweni. Umsebenzisi we-Reddit uthi, “Uma udlula ekuhlukaneni, kungokwemvelo ukuzizwa unesizungu noma ufuna ukugcwalisa leso sikhala ngomuntu omusha. Kodwa-ke, ukuphindaphinda kungaba ukuphazamiseka kwesikhashana ebuhlungwini kunokuba kube ukuxhumana okunempilo nokwesikhathi eside.”

Izimpawu zesimo se-rebound

Izimo ezinjalo ezibangelwa ukulangazelela ukuxhumana zingase zibe yingozi enhlalakahleni yakho engokwengqondo, njengoba ziphuca ukuthula obekungalethwa ubuhlobo bangempela. Ezinye izimpawu ezinjalo yilezi:

• Wena noma umlingani wakho wesimo sezulu niqede ubudlelwano besikhathi eside ngaphambi kokuthi nihlangane
• Kukhona ukuqhathanisa njalo phakathi kwabalingani bangaphambili
• Bobabili bagcina sebekhuluma kakhulu ngabadala
• Bobabili bathi “ngiyakuthanda” futhi “ngiyakukhumbula” njalo, ngaphandle kokuzwa amazwi empeleni

5. Isimo 'sokuchotshozwa phakade'

Izinhlobo ezingabizi kakhulu zezimo ama-crush. Kuzungeza ukuncengana ngaphandle kokushela ngokusobala. Akuhlali kuthandana kodwa abantu bavame ukuphupha ngomunye. 

Izimpawu zesimo 'sokuchotshozwa phakade'

Izimo ezinjalo azijabulisi kangako kunokuthanda ngokushesha. Ukukhanga ngokuvamile kusekelwe ezicini zomzimba kanye nokuyenga ucansi. Nazi ezinye izimpawu zezimo ezinjalo:

• Usanyakaza phakathi kokubuka ngokunyenya nokumamatheka okufihliwe
• Kukhona i-banter elula futhi ukudlala ngothando okunempilo kakhulu
• Kunamathuba amaningi okuthi uchotshozwayo awunalo ulwazi ngemizwa yakho ngakubo
• Uyesaba ukubacela noma ufuna nje ukugcina isimo silinganiselwe ekubabazeni ukude

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6. Isimo 'sokuhamba kwakho kumsindisi'

Uhlobo olungavamile lwesimo lapho abantu ababili bethembela komunye nomunye kukho konke kodwa bengahilelekile othandweni. Ubuhlobo babo buyinto ehlelekile futhi busekelwe kuphela ekusekelweni ngokomzwelo nakwezinye izinto. Uyakhumbula uSandra Bullock ezenza intombi kaRyan Reynolds yokuhlala e- The Proposal ? Kulungile, yilokho kanye lokhu.

Izimpawu zesimo 'somsindisi wakho'

Kuyi-trope ebekwe yi-rom-coms. Kodwa ngokungafani nasemafilimini, lesi simo asigcini nje ngokuba 'nenjabulo yaphakade' empilweni yangempela. Ezinye izimpawu zalezi zimo zimi kanje:

• Nishayana kuphela ngezikhathi ezikhethekile noma uma uzidinga
• 'Bangabanye' bakho emaphathini asehhovisi kanye nemibuthano enobungane
• Ubaletha eduze ukuze ugcine umndeni wakho emhlane wakho
• Ungase udlale ngothando noma uzibandakanye ezigamekweni zocansi ngezinye izikhathi, kodwa abukho ububanzi bobudlelwano
• Nobabili nenzelana umusa wodwa, ngokwenhlalo noma ngokwezimali

7. Isimo sehhovisi

Izimo ezinjalo zenzeka phakathi kwabantu kuphela ngoba basebenza endaweni efanayo. Iningi lalezi zimo zothando zasehhovisi lingase lingabonakali, njengoba izimo zasehhovisi zivame ukuba nokuthula.

Izimpawu zesimo sehhovisi

Isimo esiphakama ngenxa yokusondelana kochwepheshe kungase kungabi inketho engcono kakhulu kubo bobabili abathintekayo, njengoba bobabili imisebenzi yabo ingaba sengozini uma kuke kwatholakala. Futhi, izimo ezinjalo zingabangela ukucindezeleka okukhulu ngokomzwelo uma ziphela kabi. Ezinye izimpawu zesimo esinjalo zimi kanje:

• Ingozi yokutholakala yenza nobabili nigcine isimo siyimfihlo kubangani benu kanye nosebenza nabo
• Niyagadwa ngokuthi nizohlangana nini futhi kuphi, futhi nivame ukuhlangana kude nasemsebenzini noma emakhaya enu
• Nizama ukugwema ukukhulumisana emsebenzini, ukuze nigweme ukuphakamisa izinsolo, kodwa niyamamatheka noma nibhekane emehlweni okuhehayo ngezikhathi ezithile emsebenzini.

8. I-ex-tuationship

Yilapho uthandana nomuntu wangaphambili ongeke ukwazi ukumyeka. Ngakho-ke, kuyisimo esiphindaphindayo esingabangela ukucindezeleka ngokomzwelo isikhathi eside.

Izimpawu ze-ex-tuationship

Izimo ezinobuthi ezinjalo zingalimaza ukuthula kwakho kwengqondo. Ezinye izimpawu ze-ex-tuationship yilezi:

• Wena no-ex wakho nihlala nibuyelana ngezikhathi ezithile
• Ninezingxabano ezingaxazululiwe ezidala ukungezwani, kodwa ukuphakama ngokomzwelo nangokwenyama kokuba nophathina kwenza nihlangane njalo.
• I-ex-tuation yakho ayikuvumeli ukuthi wena noma umlingani wakho ningene kobunye ubudlelwano obunempilo besikhathi eside
• Nobabili nilandela umkhondo wemisebenzi yomunye, kokubili ku-inthanethi nokungaxhunyiwe ku-inthanethi
• Ninyamalala ezimpilweni zomunye nomunye okwesikhashana, nize nibuye lapho izinto ziba nzima

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9. Ukudlala ngothando okuvamile

Mhlawumbe lesi yisimo esiphephile kunazo zonke. Yilapho nobabili nazi khona ukuthi ninenhlansi futhi niyakhathalelana, kodwa futhi anisibo ' abangane nje ' futhi nichitha isikhathi ndawonye njalo.

Izimpawu zothando oluvamile

• Uya ngezinsuku ezivamile noma ohambweni, lapho ujabulela khona ukudla okumnandi nokucwayiza okulula
• Niyazazi izimfihlo zomunye ngisho nezocansi
• Awukasondelani ngokomzimba okwamanje kodwa wabelana ngamahlaya ahlekisayo namaphupho
• Nobabili niyazi ukuthi anizimisele kodwa nisaphila okwamanje
• Akukho okulindelwe noma izinhlelo
• Ayikho ingcindezi yokukhetha kuphela

Uzakwethu, uBrendon, wayekwesinye sezimo ezinjalo. Wayekuthanda ngaso sonke isikhathi futhi wajabula kakhulu lapho uzakwabo wesimo sezulu, u-Alice, eqeda lapho ethutha amadolobha eyokwenza iziqu zeManagement. Yayingekho imizwa enzima.

10. Isimo esilula

Lolu hlobo lwesimo lusekelwe ekululameni. Manje, lokho kulunga kungase kube ngenxa yezizathu eziningi futhi kungase kube yisinqumo sobabili sokuthi abashadile baqhubeke nalolu hlobo lohlelo.

Izimpawu zesimo esilula

Ezimweni ezinjalo, abantu bazohlangana kuphela ukuze baxoxe bephuze ikhofi noma bangene ebudlelwaneni bomzimba kodwa ngezikhathi ezithile kuphela, lapho bobabili bekhululekile. Ngeke bashintshe izinhlelo zabo zokuba ndawonye noma bazinike isikhathi sokuba bodwa. Ezinye zezimpawu ezinjalo zesimo esilula yilezi:

• Lapho kunokuntuleka kwesikhathi sokuhlangana njalo (lapho bobabili noma oyedwa wabo esebenze ngokweqile)
• Lapho kukhona a ukuntuleka kokuxhumana noma amakhemikhali kodwa kukhona nesifiso sokusondelana ngokomzimba
• Lapho kunokuntuleka okuphelele kwemizwa noma imizwa kodwa kukhona nokuzimisela ukujabulela ukuba ndawonye noma ukuhlanganyela emikhakheni yomuntu siqu noma yobungcweti.

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11. Isimo sothando

Lesi isikhathi esiningi esothando lapho bobabili abantu abahilelekile benemizwa ejulile ngomunye nomunye kodwa bengakwazi ukuya phambili. 

Izimpawu zesimo esinothando

Izimo ezivuthayo zingaletha i-dopamine hit yobudlelwano bothando kodwa zingakhungathekisa ngokuhamba kwesikhathi uma omunye wozakwethu efuna ukuyisa izinto ezingeni elilandelayo. Nansi indlela izimo ezishisekayo ezibukeka ngayo:

• Nobabili noma omunye wenu akakakulungeli ubudlelwano obungathi sína ngesizathu esithile kodwa nigcina nivuma ukuxhumana okunothando
• Kunomehluko endleleni yokuphila futhi bobabili abakalungeli ukulungisa 
• Nobabili nikuyo ngenxa yocansi olunothando
• Kuwuhlobo lwesimo esikhethekile ezimweni eziningi

12. Isimo sohlangothi olulodwa

Lolu hlobo lwesimo ( ubudlelwano obuhlangothini olulodwa ) lwenzeka lapho omunye wabo ekulungele ukuqhubekisela phambili izinto kodwa omunye engakulungele. Futhi lokhu kungaba nezizathu ezahlukene.

Izimpawu zesimo sohlangothi olulodwa

Izimo ezinjalo zingakushiya udidekile futhi ukhungathekile uma kunguwe obambelele kulowo msebe omncane wethemba lokuthi omunye umuntu angase athi 'yebo' ngolunye usuku. Ezinye zezimpawu zesimo sohlangothi olulodwa yilapho:

• Omunye wenu uthemba ukuthi omunye uzoshintsha umqondo wakhe
• Omunye wenu usebudlelwaneni nomunye umaqondana, kanti omunye usaqhubeka nokushela 
• Omunye wenu uthule ngemizwa yakhe, ukuze angamoshi ukuxhumana/ubungani

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13. Isimo esicishe sibe sobudlelwano

Lolu hlobo lwesimo yilapho abantu ababili becishe babe nobudlelwano obuzibophezele. Nokho-ke basazoyenza ibe semthethweni. Lokhu kungase kube ngenxa yezizathu ezihlukahlukene.

Izimpawu zesimo esicishe sibe sobudlelwano

Isimo esinjalo esikhethekile cishe ngaso sonke isikhathi siphenduka ubuhlobo bangempela kamuva. Ezinye zezimpawu zalezi zimo yilezi:

• Uma ungakalungeli ukuzibophezela futhi uqhubeke “nokugeleza”
• Uma ugxile kakhulu emsebenzini wakho futhi ungafisi “ukulebula” ubudlelwano
• Lapho uzizwa udinga ukusebenza umthwalo we ubudlelwano bangaphambili 

14. Isimo sokuzibophezela-sokwesaba

Lesi yisimo esisukela ezindabeni zokuzibophezela. Ezimweni ezinjalo, abantu bangase bachithe isikhathi ndawonye kodwa bagweme ukuzibophezela kwesikhathi eside. 

Izimpawu zesimo sokuzibophezela-sokwesaba

Uma omunye umlingani esaba ukuzibophezela , kungaba yinto ecasulayo komunye umlingani ozimisele ukuzibophezela. Ezinye zezimpawu zesimo esicishe sibe ubudlelwano yilezi:

• Ukungafuni ukungena ebudlelwaneni obujulile ngenxa yokwesaba izibopho ezihambisana nakho
• Ukugaqa ngokuzidabukela ngenxa yemithwalo edlule noma ukuhlukumezeka kobudlelwane bangaphambilini
• Ukuntula ukuvuthwa ukuze ungene ebudlelwaneni obuzibophezele

Umngane wami, u-Anna, owayesesimweni esinjalo, ekugcineni wanquma ukusiqeda. Uthi: “Kwakungenzeki lutho futhi kwangicindezela ukuba ngibe nokuthula kwengqondo.

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15. Isimo sokuphika

Uma abantu ababili bethandana futhi bechitha isikhathi ndawonye kodwa bephika ukuthi kukhona okufufusayo phakathi kwabo, kubizwa ngokuthi isimo sokuphika.

Izimpawu zesimo sokuphika

Izimo zokuphika ziyethusa, njengoba zingase zidale ukungezwani okungadingekile phakathi kwabantu ababili. Lokhu kuba kubi kakhulu uma omunye efisa ukuthi omunye aqhubeke asho okuthile, kuyilapho omunye ethule ngaso sonke isikhathi. Ezinye izimpawu ezinjalo yilezi:

• Ukuhlala uhlukile ngezikhathi ezithile ngenxa yokwesaba ukwaliwa 
• Ukugcina ibanga ngezikhathi ezithile ngenxa yokwesaba ukuzibophezela kwesikhathi eside
• Ukungabi nesibindi sokuvuma imizwa yangempela

imibuzo ejwayelekile ukubuzwa

Imicabango Final

Noma yibuphi ubudlelwano ongeke ukwazi ukubuchaza noma ukulebula bungabizwa ngokuthi isimo. Abantu bangakwazi ukungena ezimeni ezithile nabangane, osebenza nabo, ngisho nabantu abangabazi. Ubude, ukushuba, ukufana, kanye nemiphumela yangemuva kwezimo ezinjalo ziyahlukahluka. Kukuwe ukuthi uyigcine ilula, inempilo, futhi ingenazo izinkinga ngangokunokwenzeka. 

Sithemba ukuthi uhlu lwethu lwezinhlobo zezimo nezimpawu zazo zizokusiza uthole ukuthi ukukodwa ngempela yini. Zama ukwazisa imizwa yakho futhi uxhumane ngayo nozakwenu wesimo sakho, futhi usuvele ukhululekile ezinkingeni eziningi ezingavela ezimweni ezinjalo. Okubaluleke kakhulu, qiniseka ukuthi uphephile futhi uyayijabulela inqubo!

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Umnikelo wakho awuyona iminikelo yokusiza . Kuzovumela i-Bonobology ukuthi iqhubeke nokukulethela ulwazi olusha nolusesikhathini njengoba sifuna ukusiza noma ubani emhlabeni ukuthi afunde ukwenza noma yini.