Kodi mwakhala mukuganiza zosiya chikondi? Ndiye dziwani kuti simuli nokha. Pafupifupi aliyense amasangalala ndi lingaliro ili nthawi ina. Mwinamwake mwagwidwa ndi maubwenzi oipa, kuyesera mwakhama kufufuza 'amene' osapambana. Ngakhale kudzimva kukhala wokakamira muukwati wodzala ndi kupanda chimwemwe ndi mikangano kungakupangitseni kupita. "Ndiyenera kusiya chikondi?"
Posiya chikondi, sitikutanthauza kusiya chibwenzi chomwe muli nacho pano, koma kusiyiratu lingaliro la chikondi. Tikukuuzani chifukwa chake simuyenera kusiya chikondi. Osataya mtima pa chikondi ngakhale chifukwa mukumva ngati mwagunda pansi pa moyo wanu. Munthawi zamdima zotere, zimakhala zofunikira kwambiri kugwiritsitsa chiyembekezo kuti china chake chamatsenga chili pakona ndipo chikhoza kukusinthirani zinthu.
Ukamva Ngati Usiya Chikondi
M'ndandanda wazopezekamo
Kodi kuli bwino kusiya chikondi? Mukafuna kusiya chikondi, muyenera kuti muli pamavuto aakulu m'moyo. Mwina, chikondi chanu choyamba, chikondi chanu chachiwiri, kapena china pambuyo pake sichinakwanire monga momwe mumayembekezera. Munali mutasunga chiyembekezo chakuti mukadakumana ndi mnzanu wamoyo tsopano, koma m'malo mwake, ubale uliwonse wolephera, kusweka mtima kulikonse kwasinthani monga munthu ndipo chiyembekezo chimenecho chachepa pang'onopang'ono.
Pamene mwakhala mukusemphana maganizo pakati pa kukhala wonyansa, kapena ubwenzi wanthaŵi yaitali wosayenda bwino wakukhumudwitsani, n’kwachibadwa kuyamba kutaya chikhulupiriro ndi kudzifunsa kosalekeza kuti, ‘Kodi ndisiye chikondi? Koma mwina musataye mtima pa chikondi pakali pano.
Chikondi ndi chinthu chofunika kwambiri kwa munthu. Mofanana ndi chakudya, mpweya ndi madzi. Mumachifuna kuti mukhale ndi moyo wabwino. Mukasiya kukondana, zimatha kusintha kawonedwe kanu pa moyo ndikubweretsa zovuta zambiri, monga kuchepa kwa macheza, kupsinjika, nkhawa komanso kukhumudwa.
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Ngakhale kuti si anthu ambiri amene angazindikire, chikondi chimaonedwa kuti n’chofunika kuti munthu akhale ndi moyo wathanzi, wokhazikika. Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs amakhoma chikondi ngati mzati woyambira pomwe thanzi lakuthupi ndi m'maganizo limakhazikika. Kafukufuku amasonyeza kuti kukhala paubwenzi wachikondi kumachepetsa nkhawa ndi nkhawa. Izi, zimatha kuthetsa chiopsezo cha matenda a autoimmune, matenda a mtima, kunenepa kwambiri komanso kutupa.
Ndikofunika kuzindikira apa kuti kusiya chikondi ndi kusiya munthu amene umamukonda si chinthu chomwecho. Titha kukupatsani zifukwa miliyoni kuti musataye mtima pa munthu amene mumamukonda. Koma kodi zimenezi zikutanthauza kuti muyenera kulimbikira zivute zitani? Izi zikutifikitsa ku funso lofunika kwambiri - ndi liti pamene tisiya munthu amene umamukonda?
Ngati muli paubwenzi wosalimba ndi mnzanu ndipo mukuona zizindikiro za ubale woipa , ndi bwino kuchoka.
Kodi Chimachitika N'chiyani Mukasiya Chikondi?
Nthawi zina chikondi sichikwanira. Aliyense amene wapezeka muubwenzi wosakhazikika ali ndi ufulu wonse wopitiliza moyo wake popanda kudzimva ngati walakwa kapena wodandaula. Kodi n'kwabwino kusiya chikondi zikachitika? Ayi, ngakhale zili choncho. Kaya zichitike bwanji, muyenera kupitirizabe kukhala ndi chiyembekezo chakuti chikondi chidzabwera kwa inu tsiku lina. Chifukwa ngati simutero, ndiye kuti kudziona kuti ndinu wofunika, kusungulumwa komanso kusakhutira ndi moyo ndi zina mwa zinthu zomwe zimachitika mukasiya chikondi.
Tikudziwanso kuti nzosavuta kunena kuposa kuchita. Kukhala m’mikhalidwe yopambanitsa mopambanitsa chotero pamene munthu wolinganizidwa kukukondani ndi kukupangitsani kumva kukhala wosungika akuyamba kuswa chiyero chanu chamaganizo kapena chakuthupi, kungakhale ndi zotulukapo zake. Ndipo komabe, muyenera kulimbana ndi dzino ndi msomali kuti musunge chikondi m'moyo wanu.
Koma kuti mutsimikizire kuti mupitirize kupirira ndikukhulupirira kuti wina ali ndi inu, chifukwa chake simuyenera kusiya chikondi ngakhale zonse zitalakwika:
1. Maubwenzi amakusokonezani
Mukasiya chikondi ndipo osakhulupiriranso kuti chikondi chilipo kapena chinapangidwira inu, lingaliro la maubwenzi apamtima likhoza kuyamba kukugonjetsani. Simuwonapo phindu pakuyika ndalama zambiri pachinthu chomwe, malinga ndi inu, chidzatha tsiku lina.
Mwina mwakhala muubwenzi wa nthawi yayitali kapena ukwati womwe wafika poipa kwambiri. Pamapeto pake, ngakhale maubwenzi omwe mumaika ndalama zambiri m'moyo wanu akhoza kusokonekera. Kulimbana ndi kusweka mtima kungapangitse kuti lingaliro loyambiranso kuyambiranso likhale lotopetsa.
Ngakhale izi ndi zomveka, muyenera kukumbukira kuti maubwenzi onse amafuna kugwira ntchito ndi kudzipereka kwa onse awiri. Mukapeza munthu yemwe ali wokonzeka kukumana nanu pakati, mudzazindikira kuti si maubwenzi onse omwe ali okwiyitsa, olemetsa, kapena opanda pake.
Kotero, ngati mukuganiza zosiya maubwenzi chifukwa cha kutaya chikhulupiriro mu lingaliro la chikondi, ganiziraninso.
2. Nkhani zokhulupirirana ndi zotsatira za kusiya chikondi
Kusakhulupirika, kusweka mtima, ndi malo opanda kanthu mumtima mwanu ndi zifukwa zomwe wina angaganizire zosiya chikondi. Pazochitika zotere, nkhani zodalirana zimakula . Mumatsimikiza kuti aliyense amene akukukondani ali ndi zokonda zake kapena akukusewerani.
Chimodzi mwa zizindikiro zosonyeza kuti mwasiya kukondana ndi chakuti mumayamba kukayikira zoti wina angakukondeni chifukwa cha mmene mulili. Ngakhale munthu atakhala kuti akukuthamangitsani ndipo inunso mumamukonda, simungathe kuvomereza kuti mumamukonda chifukwa mbali ina simungawakhulupirire.
Ichi ndi chimodzi mwa zifukwa zazikulu zosataya munthu amene mumamukonda. Mukasonkhanitsa zowawa zokwanira, chitetezo chanu chimakhazikika ndipo mumayamba kuganiza kuti muli ndi thanzi labwino. Mwina chifukwa inu mwatsala kudabwa pa mfundo zonse. Kapena osangokhulupiriranso chikondi.
3. Nkhani zodzipereka
Monga iwo amati, kamodzi analumidwa, kawiri manyazi. Ngati mtima wanu udasyoka kangapo, mwachibadwa mumakayikira kudzipereka. Ngakhale lingaliro la ubale wautali kapena kudzigwirizanitsa nokha kwa munthu wina kumakupangitsani kukhala osakhazikika, amanjenje ndikuyambitsa kuyankha nthawi yomweyo.
Kuopa kudzipereka kumeneku ndi njira yodzitetezera yomwe imagwira ntchito mosazindikira kuti ikutetezeni ku kuvulala. Zotsatira zake, mungakhale ndi nthawi yovuta yolimbikitsa ubale wodzipereka kapena kukhala ndi mtima wodzipereka kwa munthu wina.
Nicole Stein, OB-GYN adakondana ndi wina pamachitidwe ake. Awiriwo adatuluka limodzi kwa chaka chimodzi kapena kuposerapo mpaka chibwenzi chake, Richard amayenera kusamuka kudutsa dzikolo. Izi zinasokoneza mtima wa Nicole ndipo zinamupangitsa kuti ayambe kudzipereka pambuyo pake. Iye anati: “Ndinasiyiratu zachikondi pamene Richard anachoka, ndinkaganiza kuti iyeyo ndiye wanga ndipo panopa ndilibe nazo ntchito zoti ndiyambirenso.
4. Kutaya chikhulupiriro mu maubwenzi
Ngati mukufuna kusiya chikondi kwamuyaya, pali chifukwa chomveka chomwe chilipo. Mwina mwakhala muubwenzi wodzaza ndi nkhanza , kunyengerera, komanso kusakhulupirika. Kapena mwina mwawona makolo anu, abale anu, kapena okondedwa anu ena akukodwa muubwenzi wopanda makhalidwe abwino. Izi zitha kukhala zizindikiro zoti simudzakondanso chifukwa mwataya chikhulupiriro mu lingaliro lonselo.
Zotsatira zake, mudatsimikiza kuti maubwenzi onse okondwa a banja ndi nthabwala. Anzanu, makolo anu, kapena abale anu - m'maganizo mwanu onse amakhala muubwenzi wosasangalatsa ndipo amangotengera dziko lapansi. Zimakhala zovuta kuvomereza kuti anthu awiri akhoza kusangalala pamodzi.
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5. Kusiya chikondi kungakupangitseni kukhala wodzikonda
Popeza simuli mbeta ndipo mukufuna kusiya chikondi mpaka kalekale, mungayambe kukhala ndi maganizo odzikonda. Kuntchito kapena pochita zoseweretsa, kuyenda, ndi kucheza - moyo wanu wonse umayang'ana pazosowa zanu, zomwe mukufuna, ndi zokhumba zanu.
Anthu ambiri amaona kudzikonda kumeneku ngati njira yodzikondera okha pamene sikuti ndi kudzikonda. Nthawi zambiri, kukhala moyo wanu kuganiza ndi kukwaniritsa zosowa zanu zokha mutasiya chikondi ndi njira yodzitetezera. Mukufuna kukhala odzidalira kwambiri kotero kuti kupezeka kapena kusakhalapo kwa ena sikukukhudzani.
M’kupita kwa nthaŵi, mumayamba kusiya osati pa maubwenzi okondana okha, komanso maubwenzi ndi maubwenzi ena. Izi zingapangitse moyo wanu kukhala wosungulumwa kwambiri. Pamlingo wina, mumanyansidwa nazo.
6. Kulakwa ndi kulakwa
Mukataya chikondi chimodzi pambuyo pa china, mumayamba kudziimba mlandu chifukwa cha chikondicho. Mwanjira ina, mukusiya chifukwa cha chikondi chifukwa mumakhulupirira kuti simukuyenera. Simungathe kuiwala chikondi choyamba chomwe chinakusiyani chifukwa cha uthenga woti mwasudzulana . Kapena chikondi chachiwiri chomwe mukuganiza kuti ndi chomwe chinathawa. Ndipo chikondi chachitatu chomwe sichikanatha.
Pambuyo pa zochitika zoipa zambiri, mumayamba kumverera ngati ndi vuto lanu kuti anthu sangakhalebe m'chikondi ndi inu. Kulakwa uku ndi kulakwa kumakupangitsani kumva ngati simukukondedwa. Zotsatira zake, mumayamba kukankhira kutali chiyembekezo chilichonse cha chikondi chomwe chingapezeke m'moyo wanu.
Kodi mukusiya chikondi pa 30 kapena 40? Kapena mwina mukusiya chikondi pambuyo pa 50 ngakhale? Zilibe kanthu kuti uli ndi zaka zingati. Tengani kamphindi kuti muone ngati moyo wopanda chikondi ndi womwe mumalakalaka kapena ngati chisankhochi ndi chotsatira cha zovuta zambiri.
7. Kukhazikitsa ndalama zochepa kuposa zomwe mukuyenera
Ngati kufunikira kokhala ndi bwenzi kumakhala kwamphamvu kwambiri, mumanyengerera ndikukhazikika pazochepera zomwe muyenera kuchita m'malo modikirira chikondi chomwe mukuyenera kukhala nacho. Izi zimachitika makamaka chifukwa mwataya chiyembekezo kuti mudzakumana ndi wokondedwa wanu posachedwa. Nthawi zambiri, ichi ndi chimodzi mwa zifukwa zomwe anthu amatchera msampha ndikupitirizabe kukhala paubwenzi woipa, woopsa.
Ichi ndi chimodzi mwa zifukwa zomwe anthu amakwatiranso mwamsanga! Jason Wright, wophunzitsa zolimbitsa thupi adakwatirana ndi Angela - mkazi yemwe adamuwona kwanthawi yayitali. Angela adamusangalatsa koma mtima wake sudadumphe. Iye ananena izi ponena za ukwati wawo, “Ndiyenera kuvomereza kuti tsopano ndili ndi zaka 47 ndipo ndinasiya zachikondi.
Mumayamba kuona kupeza mnzanu kapena mwamuna kapena mkazi ngati chimodzi mwa zinthu zofunika kuziganizira pa mndandanda wa zochita zanu. Ubwino wa ubale wanu siwofunika. Mnzanu kapena mwamuna kapena mkazi wanu angakunyozeni , kukupusitsani, kapena kukunyozani. Mumasankha kupirira chifukwa lingaliro lakuti wina angakukondenidi, kukuthandizani, ndikukusamalirani monga mnzanu likuwoneka ngati losatheka.
8. Kunyalanyaza malangizo abwino
Anzanu kapena okondedwa anu akayesa kukupatsani uphungu kapena kukupatsirani munthu wina, simumangonyalanyaza uphungu wawo koma mumakhala otalikirana ndi ena. Mumakhulupirira kuti munachita bwino posiya chikondi ndipo enawo sakudziwa zomwe akunena.
Kukakamira kwanu kuti musiye kufunafuna chikondi ndi kukana kuona chifukwa kungayambitse mkangano pakati pa inu ndi okondedwa anu. Mumayamba kupewa kukumana nawo kapena kulankhula nawo kuti musakokedwe mu zokambirana zakale zomwezo zokhudza chifukwa chake simuyenera kusiya chikondi kwamuyaya.
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Zifukwa 8 Simuyenera Kutaya Chikondi
Kodi mungagwirizane ndi zomwe zimachitika mukataya chikondi? Ngati inde, mwina mwayamba kale kusiya chikondi kapena muli pafupi kwambiri kuti muchite. Ngati mukuganiza zosiya kukondana pazaka 50 kapena mukungoyamba kumene m'moyo ndipo mukusangalatsidwa ndi maukwati onse oyipa akuzungulirani, tiyeni tikuwonetseni zabwino m'malo mwake komanso chifukwa chake muyenera kudikirira chikondi. Nazi zifukwa 8 zomwe simuyenera kusiya chikondi:
1. Chikondi chimakupangitsani kukhala osangalala komanso athanzi
Monga tanenera kale, chikondi chimaonedwa kuti n’chofunika kuti munthu akhale ndi moyo wosangalala. Mapindu ake amaonekera osati kokha m’maganizo anu komanso thanzi lanu. Kafukufuku watsimikizira kuti mukakhala m'chikondi, ubongo wanu umagwira ntchito mosiyana.
Izi zimachepetsa chiopsezo cha nkhawa, kupsinjika maganizo, kukwiya, kusinthasintha maganizo, ndi kusokonezeka kwa umunthu. Kumva chikondi kumatulutsa timadzi ta oxytocin timene timakhala osangalala komanso okhutira.
Mumadya bwino, mumagona bwino, ndipo mumakhala okonzeka kukhala ndi moyo wabwino. Ndiye mukadzafunsanso kuti, ‘Kodi ndisiye kukondana?’, ganiziraninso za thanzi lanu komanso moyo wanu.
2. Chikondi chimaumba umunthu wanu
Kukumana ndi chisoni kungakusokonezeni inu ngati munthu . Koma ndikofunikira kukumbukira kuti chikondi chimodzi chitatha sizitanthauza kuti mwayi wopeza wina nawonso watha. Ubale uliwonse, ngakhale utakhalapo komanso ngakhale utatha, umakuphunzitsani maphunziro ena.
Umunthu wanu ndi kuchuluka kwa maphunziro ndi zochitika izi. Mwina, mnzanuyo adakuphunzitsani momwe mungakhalire osatetezeka ndikufotokozera zakukhosi kwanu popanda choletsa. Ndipo wina adakuphunzitsani momwe mungakhalire modzidzimutsa ndikukhala ndi moyo munthawiyo.
Choncho, musayang'ane maubwenzi anu olephera ngati kutaya nthawi. Kapena mungadzifunse kuti, 'N'chifukwa chiyani ndasiya chikondi?' mukamaliza kumverera kuti simunakwaniritsidwe ndi kuseka. M'malo motaya chikondi kwathunthu, yang'anani pakugwiritsa ntchito maphunziro awa kuti mumvetsetse zomwe mukufuna ndikuyembekezera kuchokera ku ubale wanu.
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3. Kusiya chikondi kungasinthe
Kusiya chikondi sikungokhudza moyo wanu kapena ubale wanu wapamtima. Mbali iliyonse ya moyo wanu ndi umunthu wanu zimakhudzidwa ndi chisankhochi. Anthu akasiya chikondi, amakhala odzipatula, akutalikirana, komanso otseka maganizo. Amayamba kukana kulandira kapena kupereka chikondi ndi chikondi mwanjira iliyonse - osati mwachikondi chokha.
Zimenezi zingawononge ubwenzi, mabanja, luso locheza ndi anthu komanso mwayi wopeza ntchito. Mwachibadwa mumakhala ndi maganizo osuliza ndi oipa. Anthu ena angayambe kukhulupirira kuti siwofunika kwenikweni kuti asinthe moyo wawo kapena wa ena.
Kusunga mtima wanu wotseguka ku kuthekera kwa chikondi, kumbali ina, kumakupangitsani kukhala ndi chiyembekezo, okoma mtima, ndi achifundo.
4. Chikondi chimabwera pamene simukuyembekezera
Ichi ndi chifukwa china chomwe simuyenera kusiya chikondi kapena mudzanong'oneza bondo ndikudzifunsa kuti, 'N'chifukwa chiyani ndasiya chikondi?' mukakumana ndi munthu amene mumamukonda kwambiri. Mwina mwayesapo pulogalamu iliyonse yabwino yopezera chibwenzi , mwakhazikitsa madeti ndi anzanu ndi ogwira nawo ntchito, mwakhala ndi maubwenzi ambiri oipa. Mwakhala mukufunafuna chikondi kwa nthawi yayitali kotero kuti zonse zomwe mwakumana nazo zayamba kukutopetsani.
Nthawi zambiri, chikondi chimabwera pamene simukuyembekezera. Muli patchuthi, kuyesera kuti mupumule ndi kuthawa chikakamizo chopeza chikondi mukakumana ndi munthu yemwe nthawi yomweyo amayambitsa china chake mkati mwanu. Mumapeza kuti munthuyu samangopangitsa kuti mtima wanu udumphe komanso amagawana malingaliro anu adziko lapansi, zomwe mumayendera, komanso zolinga za moyo wanu. Mwanjira ina iwo ndi omwe mwakhala mukuwafuna nthawi yonseyi.
Ruby ankapita ku Seattle kukagwira ntchito, mzinda womwe sankasangalala nawo. Anali atakwera kale mundege koma ndipamene adakumana ndi Danny. Kungochokera mu kanema, zimakhala ngati awiriwa adakumana bwino kwambiri! Awiriwa tsopano akhala m’banja zaka zitatu.
Ndicho chifukwa chake kuli kofunika kusunga mtima wanu ndi malingaliro otseguka kuti mwina chikondi chenicheni cha moyo wanu chikhoza kulowamo nthawi iliyonse. Lingaliro lanu loti 'Ndasiya kukonda' silingakupindulitseni.
5. Zolinga zabwino zambiri si zophweka
Zinthu zabwino kwambiri m'moyo sizibwera mophweka. Ngati muli pachibwenzi chomwe sichikuyenda bwino koma mukuyang'anabe zifukwa zoti musataye mtima pa munthu amene mumamukonda, kumbukirani izi. Chilichonse chomwe mumanyadira komanso cholimbikitsidwa nacho chiyenera kuti chinatenga khama lalikulu ndi kulimbikira nthawi zonse. Ubale wanu suli wosiyana.
Ngati panopa simuli pabanja ndipo mukudabwa ngati komanso chifukwa chake munasiya chikondi mosavuta, dziwani kuti kupeza mnzanu wapamtima ndi chibwenzi chanu kumatenga nthawi. Mukapeza ameneyo, mudzasangalala kuti mwasankha kusasiya chikondi.
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6. Mumakonda kukhazikika pazomwe mumapeza
Kotero, chikondi chanu choyamba sichinagwire ntchito. Ndipo chikondi chachiwiri chinakhala tsoka lalikulu kwambiri. Tsopano, mukudabwa - kodi ndi zoona timangokondana katatu kokha? Izi zikutanthauza kuti mwangotsala ndi sitalaka imodzi yokha. Nkhawa imeneyo ikukukakamizani kusiya lingaliro la chikondi ndikukhazikitsa njira yotsatira yomwe ikuwoneka ngati munthu wakhalidwe labwino kukhala naye.
Komabe, kupeza chikondi chenicheni kumatanthauza kufuna kudikira munthu woyenera. Izi zikutanthauza kuti mudzakumana ndi mnzanu wapamtima posachedwa. Munthu woyenera akabwera, mudzadziwa nthawi yomweyo. Khalidwe lanu lidzafanana ndi lake ngati dzanja lovala magolovesi. Mudzayembekezera kukhala limodzi nthawi zonse. Padzakhala kulankhulana momasuka komanso moona mtima . Mudzagawana zikhulupiriro zanu ndi zolinga zanu.
Ngati simunachipezebe, musataye mtima. Koma musasiyenso chikondi. Gwiranibe pang'ono. Munthu yemwe amakwanira m'moyo wanu ndi maloto anu mwangwiro adzabwera.
7. Zimatengera munthu mmodzi yekha kuti chikondi chikhale chokhalitsa
Ndikofunika kuti musiye kuwona zizindikiro kuti simudzakondanso ndikuyesera kukhala oleza mtima.
Ndizoona timangokondana katatu kokha? Eya, palibe umboni wamphamvu wochirikiza nthano imeneyo. Anthu amatha kukondana mobwerezabwereza. Kapena angaganize molakwika kukopeka kwawo kukhala chikondi.
Ngakhale kuti kukhala mu chibwenzi kungakhale kovuta kwambiri, muyenera kukumbukira kuti zimatengera munthu m'modzi yekha kuti zinthu zisinthe kwamuyaya. Mwina, chibwenzi chanu chomaliza chinakusiyani ndi chisoni chachikulu. Kapena tsiku lomaliza limene munali nalo linali loipa kwambiri Lamlungu.
Mutha kumverera ngati muli ndi machitidwe oyipa pankhani yosankha zibwenzi ndi masiku. Ndipo simunachedwe chifukwa cha maubwenzi ndi chikondi. Koma pamafunika munthu mmodzi, tsiku limodzi, kukambirana kumodzi kusintha zonsezi.
Tsiku lotsatira lomwe mupite likhoza kukhala ndi yemwe akukhala chikondi cha moyo wanu. Mwina, mumakumana nawo popanda kupita ngakhale tsiku. Mutha kukumana nawo mwangozi pamalo odyera kapena kukumana nawo paphwando la anzanu. Nthawi yomweyo, mumamva kulumikizana komwe mwakhala mukulakalaka nthawi yonseyi.
Moyo wanu ukhoza kukhala wosiyana ndi nthawi imeneyo. Ndipo ndicho chimodzi mwa zifukwa zazikulu zopitirizira kukhulupirira chikondi.
Kuwerenga Kofanana: Kodi Mumadziwa Bwanji Kuti Mumakonda Munthu Winawake - Zizindikiro 11 Zomwe Zimasonyeza Kutero?
8. Kulephera kudzikonda
Kusiya chikondi kumatanthauza kusakhulupirira malingaliro amenewa. Mukatsutsa chinthu ndi chidaliro chotere, mumachisiya kwathunthu. Munthu amene ali nacho sakhulupirira chikondi sangangokonda ena komanso iye mwini.
Malingaliro awo a iwo eni amakhala olakwika. Onjezani ku malingaliro owopsa a kusungulumwa, kudziimba mlandu, ndi kudziimba mlandu, ndipo kudzidalira kwawo kumatha kugunda kwambiri mukamapitilira kuwona zizindikiro kuti simudzakondanso munthu wina.
M’malo motaya mtima chifukwa cha chikondi, patulani nthaŵi yokonzekera nokha. Chiritsani ndikuchira musanapatse mpata ubale wina. Ngati mukulimbana ndi kudzikonda kwanu, palibe manyazi kupempha thandizo.
Choncho, konzekerani zowawa ndi zowawa. Mvetserani zomwe mukufuna mu ubale wanu. Tengani nthawi yopuma kuti mukhale nokha, ngati mukufunikira. Koma sungani mtima wanu ndi malingaliro otseguka ku kuthekera kwa chikondi. Idzakupezani. Ngati si lero, ndiye mawa.
Ibibazo
Kusiya chikondi kumatanthauza kuti mwataya chikhulupiriro chonse pa mfundo ya chikondi ndi kutsekereza zitseko zoti mungathe kumanga ubale wabwino ndi winawake.
Ngati muli paubwenzi wopanda thanzi pomwe mumazunzidwa kapena kuzunzidwa m'manja mwa mnzanu kapena mukuwona zizindikiro zaubwenzi woyipa, ndizovomerezeka kutuluka.
Mukafuna kusiya chikondi mumasiya lingaliro lochita chibwenzi kapena kukhala ndi chidwi ndi munthu wina. Izi zikachitika, maubwenzi anu amakhala ongoyerekeza komanso opanda pake
Kuti musiye munthu amene mumamukonda, muyenera kusiya kugwirizana naye. Kutsatira lamulo lakuti “Osalankhulana” ndi njira yomwe yakhala ikugwiritsidwa ntchito kwa nthawi yayitali yosiya munthu amene mumamukonda, chifukwa imakulolani kuti musinthe ndikusiya malingaliro anu pa munthuyo.
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