Kodi Chilolezo N'chiyani Pachibwenzi?

Tikukhala mu nthawi yomwe amuna ayenera kuzindikira kuti "ayi amatanthauza ayi". Palibe njira ziwiri za izo. Kwa nthawi yayitali takhala mu chikhalidwe chomwe amuna amakana kutenga "ayi" kuti ayankhe. Kupsompsonana, kunyengerera, kugwedeza ndi kutulutsa "inde" kuchokera kwa dona paubwenzi, chifukwa cha kupsopsonana, chifukwa cha ubwenzi, zinali zovomerezeka. Tiyeni timveke bwino apa: kuvomereza pachibwenzi ndi gawo lofunika kwambiri musanaganize zokhala ndi munthu.

Chilichonse chimene iwo akhala akusonyeza m’mafilimu kapena zimene munaphunzira m’chitaganya cha makolo akale kapena m’nyumba yolamulira, zonse zinali zolakwika. Yakwana nthawi yoti musiye zinthu zonsezo. Pali chinthu chimodzi chokha: Kupanda chilolezo kumatanthauza kuzunzidwa, nthawi. Ndipo simungafune kutchedwa wovutitsa, sichoncho? Kotero ndi nthawi yoti muphunzire za tanthauzo lenileni la chilolezo pa chibwenzi.

Kodi Kuvomereza Kumatanthauza Chiyani?

Ngati mukukayikirabe tanthauzo lenileni ndi lingaliro la kuvomera pachibwenzi, tili pano kuti tikufotokozereni bwino nkhaniyi.

Buku la Cambridge English Dictionary limafotokoza mawu akuti kuvomereza ngati: kuvomereza kuchita chinachake, kapena kulola wina kuchita chinachake.

Chifukwa chake kusagwirizana ndi zinazake kapena kunena kuti ayi ndithu kungakhale kusavomera. Mtsikana akakukanani zokhumba zanu zogonana kapena kukupatsirani mawu osalankhula zomwe zikulozera kosiyana ndi kuvomera, ndiye kuti akutsutsa kuti achite nanu. Werengani malangizowo ndikutsatira malangizowo chifukwa kukanikiza popanda chilolezo ndikuvutitsa.

Inde, n'zotheka kuti nthawi zina kukambirana za chilolezo pa chibwenzi kungakhale kovuta. Koma ndikofunikiranso kudziwa kuti chifukwa choti mtsikana wavomereza kuti mumpsompsone , sizikutanthauza kuti wavomerezanso kugonana. Zimenezo zikadali zosiyana kwambiri.

Chifukwa chiyani kuvomereza kuli kofunika?

Tsopano, ili ndi lingaliro lomwe akazi amawadziwa kwambiri koma anyamata amawoneka kuti ali m'mphepete mwa izi.

"Ankafuna kundipsompsona ndiye bwanji sakufuna kugonana nane?" Zikumveka bwino? Chabwino, ndiye, inu mwachiwonekere osokonezeka kwambiri za lingaliro ndi kufunika kwa chilolezo.

Tangoganizirani chitsanzo chosavuta: Mukudya ayisikilimu wokoma muli nokha ndipo mwaganiza zongomupatsako chakudya, koma mutamupatsa, amadya zonse. Ndipo choyipa kwambiri, sanapemphe ngakhale chilolezo chanu! Izo ziyenera kukukhumudwitsani inu. Inde, munkafuna kugawana nawo kuluma kumodzi koma osati ayisikilimu yonse.

Izi zidzakupangitsani kumva kuwawa ndikuperekedwa ndipo simungathe kufotokoza zakukhosi kwanu ngakhale. N'chimodzimodzinso mukakhala bwino ndi kiss koma mwamuna wanu akufuna kuti muzichita zonse.

Tiyeni tisinthe zochitika tsopano. Muli pamalo omwewo, ndi ayisikilimu yemweyo koma nthawi ino ndi mlendo ndi inu. Simukufuna kugawana ayisikilimu ndi mlendo motsimikiza. Amakufunsani ngati angathe kuluma ndipo inu mumakana kangapo. Ziyenera kukhala zophweka mokwanira, chabwino? Koma mnyamatayo amabwera ndi kuluma.

Kuphwanya kopanda chilolezo kopanda chilolezo chanu. Atha kukhala mlendo kapena wina yemwe mumamudziwa koma mukanena kuti ayi kukhudzana kwamtundu uliwonse kuyenera kulandiridwa. Ngati akupitabe patsogolo ndiye kuti akugwiritsa ntchito mphamvu kuti akuphwanyeni.

Tsopano, tiyeni tibwererenso kukambirana za kuvomerezana pa chibwenzi komanso pazochitika zogonana. Kuvomerezana n'kofunika chifukwa mulibe ufulu uliwonse pa thupi la wina . Ndi udindo wawo kuchita zomwe akufuna ndipo ali ndi ufulu wolola wina kulikhudza kapena ayi. Chifukwa chake, kupempha chilolezo ndikofunikira.

Komabe, ngati mwaganiza zotengera thupi la munthu wina, zomwe mukuchita ndizosaloledwa. Mukuphwanya katundu wa wina, mwanjira ina.

Ngakhale titasiyanitsa kuvomerezeka kwa zonse ndikuyang'ana chilolezo chochita chibwenzi ndi PoV yodziyimira payokha, kulimbikira popanda chilolezo cha wina kudzatipangitsa kuchititsidwa manyazi, kuphwanya malamulo, kuswa chidaliro ndi chikhulupiriro komanso kusalemekeza munthuyo. Mudzaika pachiwopsezo ubale wanu ndi munthuyo ndikumupatsa nkhani zodalirika kwa moyo wonse . Kodi ndichodi chomwe mukufuna?

Kuwerenga Kofanana: Kodi chikondi chimatipatsa ufulu wonyalanyaza chilolezo? Ayi, ngakhale Bollywood itanena choncho!

Malamulo a Chilolezo Mu Ubale

Tikukhala mu nthawi ya kuvomerezana komwe kukhazikitsa malire pa chibwenzi kumakhala kofunika kwambiri. Malire awa amakhudzanso kuvomerezana. Anthu ambiri amakhalabe ndi lingaliro lolakwika lakuti chifukwa choti muli pachibwenzi ndi munthu wina, muli ndi chilolezo chokhazikika.

Izi sizowona chifukwa kuvomereza kungasinthe chifukwa cha zinthu zosiyanasiyana; kusintha kwa malingaliro, ndi chimodzi mwa izo. Pali kuthekera kwakukulu kuti ngati mwamuna kapena mkazi wanu akuwonetsa zizindikiro zonse zosagwirizana ndi mawu, ndiye kuti asiya zawo. Monga bwenzi lofanana muubwenzi, ndi udindo wanu kulemekeza zokhumbazo.

Ngati mulidi pachibwenzi monga ofanana ndi bwino kukhazikitsa malamulo okhudza mbali izi. Nthawi zonse ndi bwino kukhala ndi mawu otetezeka pankhani ya kuvomera. Anthu ambiri atiuza momwe ali ndi mawu otetezeka omwe amawagwiritsa ntchito pogonana ngati zinthu ziyamba kuchulukirachulukira kuti aliyense wa okondedwayo agwire.

Pokambirana ndi bwenzi - Chitsanzo cha chilolezo

Ankafuna kukaona tawuni ya m'mphepete mwa nyanja yomwe ndikuphunzirako panopa. Zosangalatsa, inde! Popeza ndi ine ndekha amene angayendere kuno, malo ogona adzasamaliridwa ndi iye (monga ananenera).

Chifukwa chake kukonzekera kumayenera kupangidwa ndipo akuwonetsa zochitika zonse zokhala pamodzi ndipo ali ndi chiyembekezo cha "kuphulika" komwe tikhala nako. Lingaliro lake la kuphulika, ndinamva pambuyo pake, anali atakhala mu chipinda cha hotelo, akuledzera / kuledzera ndi ine ndipo mwinamwake akupanga nane. Ndimaseka nthabwala. Zikuoneka kuti anali serious.

"Ndikakupsopsona bwanji?" komwe ndimayankha, "Ndiye ndikukankhira kutali".

"Bwanji ndikachitanso?"

Kenako ndimakufunsani kuti muyime ndikukukumbutsani kuti sindikufuna kukupsompsonani.

“Mwina ngati waledzera, ungafune kutero.”

Ndinaledzerapo kale, choncho sindikuganiza kuti ndidzafuna ngakhale pamenepo.

Mphindi yokhala chete imatsatiridwa ndi:

“Usadandaule, palibe chimene ndingachite popanda kukufunsa.

"Osadandaula, ikhalabe ayi."

"Ndingoyesabe".

Chifukwa chake "pitilizani kuyesera" ndikungondivutitsa mpaka atavomera kapena "pitilizani kuyesera" mpaka nditamva ngati ndimupsompsone, sindinayime kuti ndimufunse.

Chibwenzi chakhala chosavuta ndi mapulogalamu onse odzipereka kupeza anthu ozungulira inu. Monga ma noodles ofulumira, kupeza ma date kumatenga mphindi zosakwana zitatu. Ma date akakhala osavuta, mfundo ya kuvomerezana imaiwalika kotheratu ndipo kusavomerezana kumakhala chinthu chofala. Mwina ndicho chifukwa chake mnzanga anaganiza kuti popeza ndidzakhala limodzi usiku, tidzakhala limodzi usiku.

Kuwerenga Kofanana: Kodi Mumakhazikitsa Bwanji Malire a Maganizo mu Ubale?

Mgwirizano pakati pa chibwenzi ndi kuvomereza

Ayi amatanthauza ayi - si kuyesera kuti anthu azikufuna kuti mupitirize kuyesa mpaka mutasintha maganizo anu. Pa nthawi ya #Me Too, mayi wina yemwe adapita kukacheza ndi woseketsa Aziz Ansari adati adamva kuti akukakamizidwa kuti agone naye. Pa nthawi ya chibwenzi, mayiyo adagwiritsa ntchito "mawu ndi zizindikiro" kuti amudziwitse kuti sakusangalala ndi lingalirolo koma adapitilizabe kumulimbikitsa.

Tsikuli linatha ndi kugonana koma tsikuli silinavomereze koma sananene mokweza. Otsutsa atha kukangana za kutsimikizika kwa tsikulo kukana kumupempha kuti asiye, mphamvu zina zitha kumuneneza kwathunthu.

Mu imodzi mwa mapulogalamu ake aposachedwa, Aziz Anasari adati chochitikachi chinamupatsa malingaliro abwino. Iye anati, "Ndi chinthu choopsa kulankhula za icho. Nthawi zina ndinkamva kukhumudwa kwambiri, kuchititsidwa manyazi komanso kuchita manyazi, ndipo pamapeto pake ndinkamva chisoni kwambiri kuti munthuyu anamva chonchi. Koma mukudziwa, patatha chaka chimodzi, momwe ndimamvera za icho, ndikuyembekeza kuti chinali sitepe yopita patsogolo. Zinandipangitsa kuganizira zambiri, ndipo ndikukhulupirira kuti ndakhala munthu wabwino," adatero.

Kuloledwa pachibwenzi ndi malo osawoneka bwino

Kodi chilolezo pa chibwenzi n'chiyani? Kodi timapereka bwanji kapena kupempha nthawi zonse? Tengani chitsanzo cha Tinder . Mukasuntha kumanja, mumayamba kukambirana ndipo mwina mumakonda munthuyo. Kodi nthawi zambiri timakumana ndi "zithunzi za amuna osakwatiwa" zosapemphedwa? Posachedwapa, ndalandira chithunzi cha zinthu zopanda pake za mwamuna pa Instagram; vuto lokhalo ndilakuti sindinapemphe.

Izo zinangotulukira ndipo ine ndinayenera kukhala ndi moyo mu izo. Kuchita zimenezi tingakuyerekezere ndi kuwala konyezimira kwa munthu wodutsa. Kodi swiping kumanja kumawapatsa ulamuliro wochita zachiwerewere? Kapena kodi zimenezi zimaonedwa kuti ndi khalidwe loyenerera popeza palibe amene anavulazidwa pamaso pake? Koma tangoganizani kupita tsiku ndi Flasher iyi kuchokera ku Tinder?

Ngati atha kutumiza maliseche osafunsidwa pawailesi yakanema, pali mwayi wotani womwe samasamala za kuvomereza m'dziko lenileni lomwe?

Nkhani yokhudza chibwenzi yatsimikiziridwa bwino ndi Justin Meyers, wolemba wa GQ Magazine . Iye analemba kuti, “Timadziuza tokha kuti ndi nkhani yokhudza chibwenzi, malamulo ozungulira nkhaniyi ndi osamveka bwino kotero kuti chomwe tingachite ndi kungoitsatira ndikuyembekeza kuti palibe amene adzaimbidwe mlandu.”

Zizindikiro zololeza, monga zikuwonekera pa nkhani ya sewero, sizowoneka bwino. Mayiyo sanakuwa, akukankhira kutali koma ali ndi zilankhulo zathupi zomwe zimamuwonetsa kuti sanali wodzipereka kwambiri pakugonana pambuyo pa tsiku. Mwamunayo, komabe, samawerenga molakwika zizindikirozo kwathunthu ndipo chifukwa chake nkhani yonse yabweretsedwa patsogolo. Mawu a Justin Meyers angagwiritsidwenso ntchito kusanthula kwathunthu mkhalidwewo.

Iye anati: “Iye anaphunzitsidwa kuti umu ndi mmene iye ayenera kukhalira, kuti ife tiyenera kukhala achichepere.” Koma kunena zoona, sindinganene kuti sindinawerenge molakwa chizindikiro kwa nthaŵi yaitali kuposa millisecond.

Chifukwa chake, mzanga, yemwe ndidalankhula za iye poyambirira, yemwe amakhulupirira kuti 'Ayi' mobwerezabwereza kuti ndipange naye masewera ndi ofanana kwambiri ndi iye kuyesetsa mwamphamvu kuti 'Inde' wachangu ndi zomwe zimapangitsa tonsefe kudabwa ngati "Ayi" atha kukhala AYI.

Kodi lingaliro la kuvomereza lingaphunzitsidwe? Ndipo bwanji?

Malingaliro onse okhudza kuvomereza akhazikika pa mfundo yakuti palibe amene angaphunzitsidwe kwenikweni za izo. Pamene ana akusewera mu paki ndi mwana wina kuponya pansi mtsikana kumpsompsona pa tsaya. Ngakhale msungwana akuyesera kukankhira mnyamata kutali makolo amapita, "Aww".

Mnyamata uyu akulimbikitsidwa ndi akuluakulu ndipo akukula akuganiza kuti khalidweli ndi labwino . Kupempha chilolezo n'kwachikale kwambiri kotero kuti sikuonedwa ngati nkhani yofunika kapena gawo la maphunziro oti anthu aphunzire kuyambira ali aang'ono kwambiri.

Chifukwa chake anthuwa amakula kuganiza ngati palibe chotsimikizika Ayi, amaganiziridwa kuti chilolezo chimaperekedwa, ngakhale akucheperachepera, akunjenjemera ndi mantha kapena alibe kulimba mtima kuti alankhule.

Kuwerenga Kofanana: Anali Wogwirizana Wabwino Kwambiri Mpaka Nditayesa Kumupsompsona…

Momwe mungalankhulire za chilolezo

Anthu ambiri zimawavuta kupempha chilolezo koma zoona zake n’zakuti siziyenera kukhala zovuta m’pang’ono pomwe. Mwayi ndi wakuti ngati mutapempha chilolezo musanasamuke, mudzakhala njonda m'dziko lino la amuna omwe sali.

Kungonena kuti “Kodi ndili bwino ndikakupsompsona?” kapena “Kodi ndingakugwire dzanja?” kungaoneke ngati si nkhani yaikulu koma kungathandize kwambiri kuti munthu akukhulupirireni komanso kuti akhale paubwenzi wabwino.

Ndi bwino kutsimikiza kusiyana ndi kupepesa pambuyo pake ndipo ndi bwino nthawi zonse kuti musamangoganizira zomwe mnzanuyo akufuna. Simudziwa maganizo awo kotero khalani kutali ndi zongoganiza zilizonse.

Komanso, kumbukirani kuti filimu ndi chakudya chamadzulo sizimathera nthawi zonse pa kugonana. Sizimene akazi amafuna kwenikweni. Angayang'ane chikondi cha m'maganizo asanasankhe kuchita chibwenzi cham'thupi.

Nthawi zina, timangoganiza zomwe tikufuna kuti zichitike koma sizikupanga kukhala zoona. Njira yabwino yolankhulirana za chilolezo ndi kucheza ndi tsiku lanu mmene iye akuganiza kuti akufuna kupita. Mwanjira iyi "dera la imvi" limasamaliridwa.

Chifukwa chokhala pachibwenzi mzaka chikwi chino, makampeni ngati #MeToo akukhala nkhani yatsiku ndi tsiku. Liti “Ndingakupsopsono?” musanayambe kupsopsona munthu amakhala unromantic, mayendedwe ngati amenewa satha. Ndipo popeza amuna amakhala amuna, zili kwa akazi kuchitapo kanthu ngati kuli kofunikira ndikufuula AYI kwambiri kuti aphunzitse dziko lonse phunziro kapena ziwiri za kuvomereza.

Chibwenzi Etiquette - 20 Zinthu Simuyenera Kunyalanyaza Pa Tsiku Loyamba

Udindo wa Chilolezo : Kodi Sichingatanthauze Chinanso?

Kungoti ndidamupsopsona mnyumba mwake sizikutanthauza kuti ndakonzeka...

Chopereka chanu sichikutanthauza chopereka chachifundo . Chidzalola Bonobology kupitiliza kukubweretserani chidziwitso chatsopano komanso chaposachedwa poyesetsa kuthandiza aliyense padziko lonse lapansi kuphunzira momwe angachitire chilichonse.