Kukwatiwa Ndi Mkazi Wakutali

Tabitha anakwatiwa ndi mwamuna wa maloto ake patadutsa zaka ziwiri atayamba chibwenzi. Iye anati: “Ndinasangalala kwambiri ndipo sindinkayembekezera kukhala naye tsiku lililonse kwa moyo wanga wonse. Komabe, atangokwatirana kumene, atayamba kukhazikika m'moyo watsiku ndi tsiku, adawona kuti amangokhala chete pafupipafupi. Tabitha sankadziwa kuti banja lake lidzakhala langwiro, ndiye kuti linali vuto lalikulu kwambiri pamoyo wake. Tabitha atangomva zoti ali ndi mwamuna yemwe samukonda.

"Marty ankabwera kunyumba kuchokera kuntchito, ndipo pamene ine ndinali wokondwa kugawana nkhani za tsikulo, kulankhula za ntchito yanga, kumva kuchokera kwa iye, iye ankangogwedeza mutu pa zonsezo, kudya chakudya chamadzulo ndiyeno kukhala yekha. Ndinasokonezeka kwambiri ndi khalidwe lake!" akuwonjezera.

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Marty amaona nkhani yonse mosiyana kwambiri. "Zachidziwikire ndimakonda kubwera kunyumba kwa mkazi wanga ndikukwatiwa naye. Iye ndiye chilichonse chomwe ndakhala ndikufuna. Koma ndimakondanso malo anga paubwenzi komanso nthawi yopumula. Ndimakonda kumva nkhani zake, za anzake, koma sindili wogawana naye kwambiri. Sikuti chifukwa chosowa chisamaliro, ndi momwe ndiliri monga munthu, ndikuganiza."

Marty ndi Tabitha adakhala nthawi yayitali pachibwenzi, ali pachibwenzi chakutali. Koma atakwatiwa, Tabitha anazindikira kuti ngakhale kuti dzikolo linali kutali, ankangokhalira kusowa mtendere m’banja chifukwa cha mwamuna kapena mkazi wake.

Pali ambiri a ife, amuna ndi akazi, amene mwina tingamvetse mmene Tabita anachitira pa nkhani imeneyi. Mwamuna kapena mkazi amene sakufuna kuchita zinthu zofanana ndi zimenezi angaoneke ngati wopanda pake ndiponso wosaganizira ena.

Komabe, munthu asanayambe kukhumudwa m'chikondi, perekani kamphindi kuti mumvetsetse mwamuna kapena mkazi wanu. Kupatula apo, mudalonjeza kuti mudzawakonda mopanda malire, osayesa kuwasintha. Wokondedwa wakutali ndi chikhalidwe chabe, ndipo sichiyenera kupanga kapena kusokoneza ubale wanu.

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Zizindikiro za Mnzanu Waubwenzi Wakutali

Ngati mutawerenga nkhani ya Tabitha ndi Marty, mukuganiza kuti mwina muli mumkhalidwe womwewo, ndiye kuti zizindikiro izi za mkazi kapena mwamuna wanu amene ali kutali ndi inu zingakuthandizeni kutsimikizira zomwezo. Ngati mukuganiza kuti mwamuna wanu ndi wotalikirana ndi inu kapena kuti mkazi wanu samakhala nanu nthawi yabwino , n'zotheka kuti inu ndi mnzanuyo simuli pamlingo wofanana wamaganizo.

1. Nthawi zonse mumamva kuti simunamve

Kwenikweni ndi mophiphiritsa zonse ziwiri. Mwamuna wanu akakhala kutali kapena mkazi wanu sapeza nthawi yolankhula nanu, mudzadziona kuti ndinu wosafunika muubwenziwo. Zili ngati inu muli nawo muukwati umenewo koma mtima wanu suli mmenemo. Nthawi zonse mukamatchula zinazake kapena kuyambitsa nkhani, amaganiza kuti mukungochita zinthu monyanyira kapena kuti mukungochita zinthu mopambanitsa.

Izi zingakupangitseni kumva ngati simukumvedwa bwino komanso ngati simukumvedwa. Ngati ndi munthu wodzikonda, angagwiritse ntchito mawu osonyeza kuti mukumvetsa zinthu mopanda nzeru kuti muganize kuti chilichonse chomwe mukumva chili m'mutu mwanu ndipo sichikuchokera kwina kulikonse.

2. Amakonda kuchita zinthu okha

Ngati mwamuna wanu amatenga ulendo wokapha nsomba ali yekha nthawi ndi nthawi, chimenecho sichizindikiro chotsimikizirika kuti ndi mwamuna kapena mkazi wakutali. Koma ngati amatero kaŵirikaŵiri kapenanso atakhala yekha pa bala usiku uliwonse pambuyo pa ntchito, ndiye kuti mungakhale ndi chifukwa chodera nkhaŵa za ukwati wanu.

Ngakhale mutakhala limodzi m'nyumba kapena mukudya chakudya chamadzulo, amakhala kutali ndi inu ndipo salankhula chilichonse. Ndipo atangomaliza kudya, samakuuzani kuti nonse mutenge chakumwa kapena kuonera limodzi pabedi. Mwamsanga amathamangira ku phunziro lake ndipo madzulo ena onse amakhala kumeneko. Ngati ichi si chizindikiro cha mwamuna yemwe sapezeka, sitikudziwa kuti ndi chiyani.

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3. Amathandiza pang'ono paubwenzi

Kukonzekera tsiku lobadwa losayembekezereka, kuchita zinthu zachikondi zapadera, kukuuzani kuti nonse awiri mukumane nkhomaliro pakati pa tsiku lantchito kapena kuyesa zinthu zatsopano pabedi - izi ndi zinthu zomwe anthu amachita kuti asonyeze chikondi komanso kuti ubale wanu ukhale wolimba. Koma ngati mukunena kuti “Mwamuna wanga ndi wozizira kwambiri” kapena kuti “Mkazi wanga sandisamala konse”, mwina ndi chifukwa chakuti sachitapo chilichonse mwa izi ndi inu.

Ubale ndi njira ziwiri, sungakhale munthu yekhayo. Zingakhale zokhumudwitsa kwambiri ngati ndiwe yekha amene umachita chilichonse kuyambira kukonzekera chakudya mpaka kuyesetsa kukhala nawo.

Kodi N'chiyani Chimachititsa Munthu Kukhala Patali Mwamaganizo?

Kusunga malingaliro anu patali kungakhale njira yothanirana ndi mavuto kwa ena. Maubwenzi akale kapena zochitika zosokoneza maganizo zingapangitse munthu kubisa malingaliro ake ndi kufuna kuti nawonso apitirize kukhala choncho. Izi sizikutanthauza kuti sizoyenera kukhala ndi vuto la maganizo. Kupatula apo, adakukwatirani ndipo adadzipereka kwa inu m'maganizo. Choncho amakukondani. Ndi njira yothana ndi mavuto a moyo ndipo tonsefe tili ndi njira zathu zapadera zochitira zimenezo.

Osamukankhira mnzanuyo kuti afotokoze chifukwa chake ali choncho. Ngati ndi chifukwa cha chilichonse m'mbuyomu kapena kukulira kwawo, mutha kuzindikira zomwe zimayambitsa pakapita nthawi. Koma musawawerengere chilangocho, chifukwa Chiwathamangitsa.

Kodi Mungatani Ndi Mwamuna Wopanda Mtima?

Ngati zizindikiro zomwe zili pamwambazi zalira belu ndipo mukutsimikiza kuti muli ndi mnzanu wapamtima, ndiye kuti tsopano mukuganiza za momwe mungachitire ndi mwamuna yemwe alibe malingaliro ndikuyesera kukonza banja lanu. Chomwe chili ndi anthu omwe ali odzipatula ndikuti muyenera kuchita nawo mosamala kwambiri.

Ndi anthu ovuta kale ndipo simukufuna kugunda malo olakwika ndikuwapangitsa kukhala omasuka kapena osowa. Chifukwa chake, ngati mukumva ngati Tabitha paubwenzi wanu ndiye izi ndi zomwe mungachite:

1. Siyani kucheza zolakwa mwamuna wanu ali patali

Ndi chikhalidwe cha umunthu kuyesa kupeza njira zothetsera mavuto, ndi kupeza mayankhowo mwamsanga. N'chifukwa chiyani akuzizira chonchi? Chifukwa chiyani sagawana zambiri za moyo wawo? Kodi ndi kupanda chikondi? Kodi pali cholakwika ndi ine? Kodi nchifukwa ninji ndili ndi mwamuna wosachirikiza maganizo? Kodi iye sangakhoze basi kugwirizana kwenikweni maganizo? Kusokera m'mafunsowa kungakhale yankho loyamba pavutoli, ndithudi siloyenera.

Dziwani kuti ndinu anthu amitundu iwiri yosiyana ndipo yesani kukulitsa ulemu umenewu muubwenzi wanu. Palibe cholakwika chachikulu apa chomwe chikufunika kukonzedwa, kupatula kusonkhana kwa miyoyo iwiri yapadera, iliyonse yokhala ndi umunthu wake. Inde, mungafunike kukonza zinthu zingapo ndikupeza momwe mungasangalalire wina ndi mnzake, koma sizimayamba ndi kuimbana mlandu nthawi zonse. Mukalemekeza kusiyanako ndikusiya kuona ngati vuto, zinthu zidzakhala zosavuta.

2. Pangani malamulo a banja lanu kuti mukhale ndi ubale wabwino

Vuto lenileni lomwe limabwera pambuyo pake ndikupeza malo apakati omwe angakuthandizeni nonse ndikukusungani osangalala. Mukumvetsa zosowa za mnzanu ndipo mukuyembekeza kuti nayenso adzapeza zanu. Amafuna nthawi yocheza? Inde, muli ndi zochita zanu zomwe muyenera kutsatira. Pitani kunja ndi anzanu , yambani chizolowezi chatsopano, khalani ndi nthawi ndi banja - chitani zonse zomwe mungathe kuti mudzaze moyo wanu.

Osamutenga kufuna kukhala yekha ngati sakufuna kukhala nawe. Sagawana zomwe zili m'maganizo mwake? Zili bwino, chifukwa sizikutanthauza kuti amakupezani kuti simungakwanitse kuthetsa mavuto ake. Muloleni ayese adziwe yekha kaye koma muuzeni kuti mulipo nthawi iliyonse akakufunani. Kukankhira munthu yemwe ali kutali kwambiri kuti achoke m'malo ake otonthoza kudzawakankhira kutali ndi inu.

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3. Osamangozindikira mwamuna wanu yemwe sakukuthandizani m'maganizo, muzindikire

Kukhala wokhoza kuvala mtima wanu pamanja kumakhala kovuta kwa mwamuna kapena mkazi wanu ngakhale kuti zingabwere mosavuta kwa inu. Koma si zonse zomwe zili kwa iwo motsimikiza. Dziwani zomwe zimawasangalatsa ndipo muwachitire zimenezo. Munthu woteroyo amadziwa bwino za winawake amene akuyesera kuti amumvetse ndi kuwavomereza monga momwe alili.

Khama lanu lowalola kukhala momwe mukufunira kuti azigawana zonse zomwe zili mumtima mwawo, lidzayamikiridwa kwambiri ndi iwo. Kodi mungatani ndi mwamuna amene sakufuna kukhala naye paubwenzi? Pali njira zothetsera vutoli. Sakufuna kulankhula, koma mukufunabe kukhala limodzi? Onerani kanema kapena sewero, ndipo lidzakhala lopambana. Mwazindikira kuti ali ndi sabata yovutitsa ndipo akubisa malingaliro ake. Pitani mukachite zinazake nokha, dzipezeni nokha ndikupeza chimwemwe chomwe mukuyenera. Adzamva bwino kwambiri podziwa kuti muli okondwa ndipo mukuchita bwino.

4. Chotsani njira yoyendetsa yokha

Kunena kuti 'Mwamuna wanga ndi wozizira m'maganizo' ndiyeno kulira si nkhani ya nthawi yaitali. Mukungoyenera kukwera apa ndikutenga zingwe m'manja mwanu pang'ono. Ngati sasintha, musamukakamize kutero. Ndinu woyamba kusintha, khalani woyamba kuchitapo kanthu moyenera.

M’malo modzimva kukhala wokhumudwa, wotaika ndi wolandidwa, khalani amene muyenera kusintha kaye ndi kusangalatsa mtima wa mwamuna kapena mkazi wanu. M'malo molola kuti zinthu ziziyenda bwino komanso kuti muzingoyendetsa basi, yendetsani banja lanu ndikuyesa mtundu wina watsopano. Ganizirani za inu nokha, tsatirani zokhumba zanu, musamangoganizira za mnzanu yemwe ali kutali.

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5. Lekani kuthamangitsa zomwe zili zanu kale

Pomaliza, zindikirani kuti ngakhale kuti mwamuna wanu ali kutali, mwamuna kapena mkazi wanu ali nanu m’banja ngakhale kuti si mmene munali kuyembekezera. Ngati mutayesa kuwapanga munthu wina kapena kusandutsa ukwati wanu kukhala chinthu china, mukhoza kutaya zomwe muyenera kuyamba nazo. Gwiritsirani ntchito mikangano yanu pamodzi, osayesa kufotokoza chikondi monga momwe zimamvekera.

Nanga Tabita zinamuyendera bwanji?

"Chabwino, ndinazindikira kuti kulumikiza mtunda uwu kungatanthauze kuti ndikuchitapo kanthu kuposa iye chifukwa ndimamvetsetsa momwe zimakhalira zovuta kuti atenge sitepe imodzi, osasiyapo zisanu zomwe ndingakhale ndikuchita." Ndipo sindikudandaula kuchitapo kanthu, chifukwa ndikudziwa kuti amandichitira izi m'njira zina zambiri, nthawi zonse ", akutero.

Ibibazo

Kodi Mungathetse Bwanji Kunyong'onyeka Mu Ubwenzi?

Kusefukira kwa Maganizo: Kodi Zimatanthauza Chiyani Mu Ubale?

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Chopereka chanu sichikutanthauza chopereka chachifundo . Chidzalola Bonobology kupitiliza kukubweretserani chidziwitso chatsopano komanso chaposachedwa poyesetsa kuthandiza aliyense padziko lonse lapansi kuphunzira momwe angachitire chilichonse.

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