E mamae ana rānei ngā tāngata tinihanga? Koinei te pātai i puta ake i te hinengaro i te rongonga i te waiata Hurricane, he waiata nā Kanye West i tuku, i reira i kōrero ai ia mō tana mahi tinihanga i tana marena ki te whetu o te ao tūturu, a Kim Kardashian. Tērā pea he kōrero toa, tata ki te whaki i tana hara (ā, mai i taua wā tonu, kua inoi tonu ia kia houhia te rongo, engari kāore i tino angitu).
Heoi, he tokomaha e whakapono ana ko āna mahi i muri i tōna wehenga i whakautu i te pātai tawhito mō te tinihanga – he rite tonu te mamae o te hunga tinihanga ki te mamae o te tangata e whakapōrearea ana e rātou tōna oranga? Ko te whakautu māmā ko te āe. Ā, mō te tini o te tangata, tae atu ki a Kanye, he tino pouri te nuinga.
I te nuinga o te wā, ka riro i te tangata tinihanga te pito poto o te rakau, ko te hapori e tautoko ana i tana hoa. Hei tauira, whakaritea te urupare ki a Kim Kardashian me tana aroha hou ki a Pete Davidson ki te tawai i riro i a Kanye mō tana tinihanga.
Ko te mea nui, e kino ana te ao ki te tangata tinihanga, engari he onge te whakaaro o te tangata ki te pānga o te tinihanga ki te tangata tinihanga. Ahakoa he wā kino rawa atu te puremu mō ngā tāne me ngā wāhine, kāore e kore ka pāngia ngā tāngata tinihanga e ngā hua o ā rātou mahi, i ētahi wā he nui ake te kino i ō rātou hoa. Me pēhea te tika, ā, he aha hoki? Ka whakamāramahia e mātou ngā take o te mamae o ngā tāngata tinihanga i te kōrero tahi me te kaiwhakaora me te kaiwhakatakoto whakaaro o te ao, a Tania Kawood.
E Mamae Ana Ngā Kaitinihanga? 8 Ngā Huarahi e Pā ai te Whakaponokore ki te Tangata Hara
Ripanga o Ihirangi
Ko te tinihangatia tētahi o ngā mahi tinihanga tino whakaiti ka pā ki te tangata i roto i tētahi hononga pumau, i tētahi marena rānei. Ahakoa kei te hoa e tinihangatia ana te aroha me te ngākau aroha, he iti noa iho te hunga e pātai ana: Kei te mamae rānei te hunga tinihanga pērā i ō rātou hoa?
I pāngia a Anna (ingoa kua hurihia), he kaiwhakahaere hokohoko ipurangi 40-tau te pakeke, e tētahi hapa i roto i tana marena i tētahi o ngā wā ngoikore. Kāore i pai te haere o ngā mea me tana tāne, ā, koinei te wā i tūtaki ai ia ki tētahi hoa mahi i hono tonu atu ai ia ki a ia. I puta tētahi mea i tētahi atu mea, ā, kāore i roa ka moe tahi ia.
Kāore e kore ka roa ka puta te moe tāne, ka pā kino ki tana marena. "Kāore au i te harikoa i te mutunga o taku moe tāne, i muri rānei i te mutunga. Ahakoa ngā āhuatanga, i mōhio ahau he hē taku mahi, ā, i tino nui te āwangawanga mō te pānga ki tōku whānau. Kāore rawa e taea e au te tuku katoa i a au ki tētahi o aku whanaungatanga," te kī a Anna, he takakau i tēnei wā.
Ka whiwhi te hunga tinihanga i tā rātou karma, i runga i te mamae e pā ana ki ō rātou whānau? Ae, ka whiwhi rātou. Ko ngā kare ā-roto me te ekenga hurihuri e horomia ana he whanaungatanga i waho o te marena, i te whanaungatanga turekore rānei, he maha ngā wā ka pā kino ki te hunga e uru ana ki roto. Hei tīmatanga, ehara i te mea onge te huri hei tangata tinihanga i muri i te tinihangatia (e mōhiotia ana ko te tinihanga utu ). Waihoki, ko te raruraru o te kore whakapono ko te kore te tangata e tinihanga ana i ngā wā katoa, ka kino rawa te pānga hinengaro me te pāpori ki a rātou.
Ko te mea kino rawa atu, kāore rātou e whiwhi tautoko mai i te whānau, i ngā hoa rānei, ā, ahakoa ka whiwhi rātou, kāore i te tino ngākau pono. Nō reira, ahakoa he tika, he hē rānei, ka whiwhi te hunga tinihanga i tā rātou karma i tētahi ara, i tētahi ara rānei. He hē te whakaaro he ngāwari noa iho te hunga e hē ana. Ahakoa he rerekē te take mō te whakauru ki tētahi hononga ā-ira mō ia tangata, he mea noa ki te hunga tinihanga te rongo i te hara, te whakama, te manukanuka, te manukanuka, me ētahi atu kare ā-roto kino.
Pānui e pā ana: Me pēhea te whakahoki mai i te whakawhirinaki i muri i te tinihanga: 12 Ngā huarahi e ai ki tētahi tohunga
He aha ngā whakaaro o te hunga tinihanga mō rātou anō? E kī ana a Tania, "E mārama ana kāore rātou i te tino hauora, i te tino harikoa rānei, i te hinengaro. He rite tonu te mamae o te hunga tinihanga ki ō rātou hoa e teka ana rātou ki a rātou? Kāore e taea te kī i roto i ngā kupu tūturu engari ko te pono he ripeka anō tā rātou hei pikau. Kāore i te tokomaha e mōhio ana ka kite te hunga tinihanga i ngā mea i ngaro i a rātou i mua, ā, he pānga nui tēnā ki ō rātou whanaungatanga ā muri ake nei."
E kōrero pono ana a Harry (ingoa kua hurihia), he kaipakihi, mō te wā tinihanga i pakaru ai tana marena. "I moe tahi māua ko tētahi hoa, engari he nui te pānga ki taku marena i te wehenga atu o taku tāne i ahau. Engari ko te mea kino rawa atu, kāore i roa te whanaungatanga i whawhai ai ahau ki te ao katoa, ā, i pakaru ai ahau. Ki taku whakaaro, i whakautua taku pātai mutunga kore - e mamae ana ngā kai tinihanga?" tana kī.
He maha ngā whanaungatanga poto a Harry i muri i tana wehenga, engari kua ngaro te aroha roa i a ia. Nā te whanaungatanga rānei? "Ki taku whakaaro. I pātai pinepine ahau ki a au anō, "Ka whiwhi te karma i ahau mō te tinihanga?" I te wehenga atu o taku hoa tāne i ahau, ka mōhio ahau tera pea he mea e kiia nei ko te karma," tana kī.
I roto i te poto, ka rongo te hunga tinihanga i te mamae, te hara, me te maha atu o ngā kare ā-roto, ā, he maha ngā wā ka pā te tinihanga ki a rātou. Anei ētahi pānga o te tinihanga ki te tangata hara:
1. E mamae ana te hunga tinihanga? He maha ngā wā ka meinga rātou e te hara
" Ko te hara tinihanga te pānga nui rawa atu o te tinihanga. Ahakoa te harikoa o te tangata ki tāna hoa aroha, kāore e taea te mawhiti i te hara o te whakarere i tāna hoa rangatira kua moe ture, i tāna hoa piripono rānei. Ka pā pea tēnei ki tōna whakaaro nui ki a ia anō," te kī a Tania.
Ko te mea kāore e whakaaetia te puremu i roto i te nuinga o ngā ahurea, ā, he maha ngā wā ka whakaititia te whakaaro ko te momo mamae kino rawa atu ka taea e koe te whakararu i tō hoa, he mea taimaha ki te hinengaro o te tangata tinihanga. Heoi anō, kei reira te ahotea o te mahi huna i te whanaungatanga. Mai i ngā pānga katoa o te kore whakapono ki te tangata tinihanga, ko te mea e noho ana rātou me te taumahatanga o te tinihanga ka pā kino ki tō rātou hauora hinengaro.
2. Tērā pea ka hiahia anō koe ki te tinihanga
Ko te nuinga o te hunga tinihanga e whakamārama ana i ā rātou whanonga he mea kotahi noa iho i puta mai i ētahi raruraru i roto i tā rātou marena. Engari e ai ki te kōrero, "Ki te tinihanga koe, ka hokihoki tonu koe." Kāore he taurangi kāore koe e hokihoki i te whanonga, ā, ka uaua ki tō hoa te whakawhirinaki ki a koe.
"He maha ngā whanaungatanga i puta mai i ngā mahi moepuku kāore e mau tonu mō tēnei take. I roto i te nuinga o ngā wā (ehara i te katoa), ka puta te kore pono i te kore e taea te pupuri i ngā kupu whakaari, te tango rānei i te kawenga mō ā rātou mahi. He mea nui te noho māharahara me te mataku ki te whakatau i te āhua o ō rātou whanaungatanga," te kī a Tania.
Ki te mea ka haere tonu rātou ki te mahi i te hapa kotahi, ka puta te pouri o ngā kai tinihanga ki ā rātou mahi ? Ae rā. He pono rānei ka ngaro ō kare ā-roto i te tinihanga, ā, ka kore e aro ki ngā hua ka puta ina mau te tinihanga? Kāore rawa. He aha ngā whakaaro o ngā kai tinihanga mō rātou anō? Ko te nuinga o ngā kai tinihanga e mahi ana i ngā mahi tinihanga ka whakawhanake i te mauahara ki a rātou anō mō ā rātou mahi kore pono, ā, ka tino pāngia te kai tinihanga e ngā pānga o te kore pono.
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3. Ka pā kino te wehi o te karma
Kiia koinei ngā pānga wairua o te tinihanga, engari ko te hunga e uru ana ki te puremu ka karapotia e te wehi o te karma. Ka whiwhi te hunga tinihanga i tā rātou karma? He pātai ngaro pea tēnei, kāore he whakautu tika, engari kāore he mawhiti i te taumahatanga o te kino me te wehi.
"Whakapono mai ki ahau ina kī atu ahau ki a koe, kāore ngā hua o te tinihanga i tō hoa rangatira e tīmata ina kitea e rātou tō tinihanga, engari ka tīmata i te wā tonu ka mahi koe i tēnā," te kōrero a Albert, he kaihangarau pūmanawa 32-tau te pakeke nō California. "I muri i taku tinihanga i taku hoa rangatira, i whakaaro ahau ka taea e au te wikitoria i te hara me te wehi i pā ki ahau. I te mutunga, ko te hara me te wehi te mea i ārahi i ahau ki te whaki," tāna tāpiri.
Ka pāngia te hunga tinihanga e ngā hua o tā rātou tinihanga nā te mea he nui te mamae o ā rātou hoa. Heoi anō, ka werohia rātou e ō rātou hinengaro, inā koa mēnā ehara te whanaungatanga i te mea raruraru. Nō reira, ko te hunga e uru ana ki tētahi mahi moepuku i te wā e whakapono ana rātou he hē i runga i te matatika me te tikanga, ka uaua ki te aro atu ki ngā hua o ā rātou mahi. Mō ēnei tāngata, tera pea ka kino ake ngā pānga wairua o te tinihanga i ngā pānga ture (mēnā ka whai ā rātou hoa rangatira i te ara ture).
4. E mamae ana hoki tō whānau
Ka pāngia te hoa rangatira e te tinihanga o te tangata, tae atu ki te whānau katoa. Ehara i te mea onge te hoa kua whara ka huri hei tangata tinihanga i muri i te tinihanga. Waihoki, ina whai tamariki, ka puta he wā tinihanga me ngā pakanga i muri mai ina hurahia te tinihanga, ka pā kino ki ngā tamariki.
"He mea whakamatautau te whakaaro, he nui ake te mamae o ngā tāngata tinihanga, o ō rātou hoa rānei? Engari ko te mea pono, ehara i te tangata tinihanga, i te hoa rangatira rānei, engari ko ngā tamariki te hunga tino mamae. Ka roa pea ngā pānga o te kore whakapono ki ngā tamariki , ā, ka taea te whakarerekē i tā rātou tirohanga katoa ki ngā whanaungatanga," te kī a Tania. Arā, ko te mamae o te whānau pea te whakautu ki: Ka whiwhi te hunga tinihanga i tā rātou karma?
5. Ka piki ake ngā taumata ahotea
Ina uru koe ki tētahi whanaungatanga turekore me te mōhio, ka hohoro te ngaro o te harikoa tuatahi o te hua rāhui hei ahotea me te ngakau pouri. Mā te huna i te whanaungatanga, te wehi kei mau koe, me te hara o te tinihanga ka tangohia atu ngā harikoa katoa o te whanaungatanga.
He aha ngā whakaaro o te hunga tinihanga? He maha ngā wā ka pāngia te tangata tinihanga e te pupūtanga o ngā kare ā-roto, ka nui te aroha o tā rātou hoa aroha, ā, ka tūtaki hoki ki te mauahara me te riri nui mai i tā rātou hoa rangatira (mēnā ka mau ia). Ka arahi katoa ēnei ki ngā kare ā-roto tino uaua ka pā ki ētahi atu āhuatanga o tō rātou ao pērā i te mahi me te umanga.
6. Kāore te take o mua e ngaro atu
Kei te ngaro te hunga tinihanga i tā rātou hoa o mua? Ahakoa te āhua o waho, tera pea ka kī "kāo", engari i tētahi wāhi ka huna tonutia te atarangi e tā rātou hoa o mua. He uaua ki te mawhiti i te meka i teka rātou, i takahi rānei i ngā oati o te marena, i ngā kupu whakaari rānei mō tētahi hononga pumau. Heoi anō, i roto i te nuinga o ngā whānau, ahakoa i roto i tētahi marena koretake , ko te hoa rangatira kua moe ture te mea e whiwhi ana i te tautoko a te whānau whānui.
Āhea ka mōhio te hunga tinihanga kua hē rātou? Ina whara te hoa rangatira, tae atu ki te whānau whānui, tae atu ki ngā tuākana me ngā mātua, koinā te wā ka kitea ai te hē. Ina tīmata te puta o ēnei mea katoa, ka kite rātou i te kino i puta mai i a rātou.
7. Ka pāngia ngā whanaungatanga ā muri ake nei e te tinihanga
Ko tētahi āhuatanga kāore anō kia kōrerohia nuitia ko te pānga o te tinihanga ki ngā whanaungatanga ā muri ake nei o te tangata tinihanga. Ahakoa te ngana ki te whakaatu i te rerekētanga, he uaua ki te tangata te whakawhirinaki ki te tangata kua teka, kua tinihanga hoki i tana hoa.
"Ko tētahi o ngā tino take i wehe ai māua ko taku hoa tāne he maha āna tawai mai ki ahau mō taku whanoke i te wā e whawhai ana māua. I mataku ia kei te mea kāore au i mangere ki te tinihanga i taku tāne, kei whakarērea hoki ia e au," te whakaae a Anna. Nō reira, kei te mamae ngā kai tinihanga? Te āhua nei kāore i te ngoikore noa iho tā rātou hononga matua, engari kei te mamae tonu rātou ahakoa kua rapua e rātou he hoa hou.
Pānui e pā ana: 9 Ngā Take e Noho Marena ai Ngā Tāne Tinihanga
8. Ka whakawakia tonu koe
Engari, i roto i te ao whanaungatanga, kāore e ngāwari te haere a te hunga tinihanga. Kia mōhiotia whānuitia te mahi tinihanga, ka whakawakia tonu koe mā roto i taua tirohanga, ka whakapaetia, ka tukinotia. Kei te pāngia rānei te hunga tinihanga e te whakapae kotahi ki te tangata e moe tahi ana rātou? Āe, ko ngā pānga hinengaro o te noho hei wahine , hei tāne rānei, he nui ake te kino i ngā whakapae katoa a te hapori.
Ko te riri tika e waiho ana mō te hoa tinihanga i roto i te whanaungatanga. "I roto i te nuinga o ngā wā, ka whakapae te hoa rangatira kua pōuri i tana hoa kua he mō ngā raruraru katoa o te marena, tae atu ki ngā mea kāore e pā ana ki te whanaungatanga. Ā, kāore e taea e te hoa rangatira te mahi i tetahi mea nui atu i te noho i roto i te whanaungatanga kua mate," te kī a Tania.
E mōhio ana rānei ngā kaipahua ki ngā mea i ngaro i a rātou?
He āe whakamiharo te whakautu ki tēnei pātai. Ko te take katoa o te hara o te tangata tinihanga, me te take e kore ai ngā tangata tinihanga e hiahia kia kitea e ō rātou hoa te tinihanga, he wehi kei ngaro katoa i a rātou. Heoi, tera pea ka mōhio noa rātou ki tā rātou i ngaro i muri i te nuinga o ngā kino i mahia.
Koinei te āhua o Todd, he kaimahi inu pia 29-tau te pakeke i NYC. "I roto i taku mahi, ehara i te mea onge te tinihanga o te tangata ki ā rātou hoa rangatira. I muri i taku mahi i tēnei hapa nui ka mōhio ahau ina mau koe i te tinihanga , ka tino ngoikore koe i te hara, te mate, me te mauahara ki a koe anō. Koinei ngā hua o te tinihanga i tō hoa rangatira."
"I mate taku hoa rangatira i muri tata tonu i tana kitenga i tēnei mea, ā, e ono tau te roa o taku noho tahi i ngaro noa atu," tana kōrero mai ki a mātou. Mena kua whakaaro koe mēnā ka pouri ngā tāngata tinihanga ki ā rātou mahi, e whakaatu ana ngā rangahau ko te haurua o te hunga tinihanga ka pāngia e te hara o te tangata tinihanga, he mea ehara i te mea ngāwari ki te whakatau.
Āhea ka mōhio te hunga tinihanga kua hē rātou?
Mena kei konei koe nā te mea kua tinihangatia koe, ā, kei te whakaaro koe he aha ngā whakaaro o ngā kaipahua, e mōhio ana koe he maha ngā kaipahua e pouri ana mō tā rātou whakatau. Engari āhea ka mōhio ngā kaipahua kua hē rātou? I te nuinga o te wā, ka puta mai tēnei mōhiotanga ina tino tūpono te mōrearea o te ngaronga o tā rātou whanaungatanga matua. Ina wehe rānei ngā hoa tokorua nā te kore whakapono.
Ina tīmata te piki haere o ngā hua ka kitea e te nuinga o ngā kaipahua kua hē rātou. I ētahi atu wā, ki te kitea e koe ngā tohu o te hara tinihanga i roto i tētahi, kia mōhio koe kua mōhio pea rātou ki te hapa i mahia e rātou, ā, kei te uaua ki te aro atu ki te hara o te kaipahua.
Tohutohu Matua
- Ehara i te mea ko te hoa kua tinihangatia anake te pānga o te tinihanga, engari he maha ngā wā ka pāngia te tangata tinihanga e ngā hua kino.
- Ko te hua nui rawa atu e pā ana ki te hunga tinihanga ko te hara o te tangata tinihanga, te wehi o te karma, me te wehi kei ngaro katoa ā rātou mea.
- He maha ngā wā ka mōhio te hunga tinihanga ki tā rātou i ngaro i muri i te mutunga o ngā kino katoa.
Nō reira, kāo, ehara i te mea pono te tinihanga ka ngaro ō kare ā-roto, kāore rānei ngā kaipahua e mamae nā ā rātou mahi. Ka taea e te moepuku te whakaoho i te hiahia o te tangata e uru ana ki roto mō te wā tuatahi. He tino pono te harikoa e pā ana ki te kaipahua, engari he rite tonu te pono o ngā raruraru e puta mai ana i muri mai. Ina tinihanga koe, ko te tangata e tino whara ana ko koe, nā te mea ka neke atu pea tō hoa, ka tīmata te ora. Engari ko te hara me te kawenga mō te mamae, nāu anake hei whakatau. He pai te utu?
FAQs
He maha ngā wā ka nui ake te āwangawanga o te hunga tinihanga kei tinihangatia rātou, nui atu pea i te āwangawanga o te hoa pono kei tinihangatia rātou. Nā te mea kāore e taea e ngā hoa tinihanga te whakawhirinaki ki a rātou anō ka kore e tinihanga, ā, ka kore e pono ki tā rātou hoa i ngā wā katoa, ka whakaaro rātou he pērā anō te āhua o tā rātou hoa ki a rātou. Nō reira, tera pea ka nui ake tō rātou mataku i te tikanga.
I te nuinga o te wā, he maha ngā wā ka tino māharahara te hunga tinihanga, kāore e taea te whakahaere i ō rātou kare ā-roto, ā, he rite tonu ki te hunga e pāngia ana e te mate. Heoi anō, kāore e tika kia pērā te āhua o ia tangata tinihanga.
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