He aha ngā tāne ka wehe atu ai i mua i te whakaae?

He mea whakahihiri tonu te tūtaki ki tētahi tangata hou. He mea whakahihiri aua kare ā-roto kaha o te mōhio ki tētahi me te aroha ki a rātou. Ko ngā wāhanga tuatahi o te hiahia tonu ki te noho tahi me rātou. Me whakarongo koe ki a rātou e kōrero ana. Me mōhio koe ki ā rātou mea e pai ana ki a rātou, ki ā rātou mea e kore e pai ki a rātou. Me hongi koe i a rātou me ērā atu mea! Ahakoa te āhua o te aroha he rite tonu ki tētahi kiriata Hollywood, ka tīmata mārire te tangata ki te neke atu.

Nā, he aha rā ngā tāne ka wehe atu ai i a koe i te mea kei te pai haere ngā mea katoa? Kāore e taea te ārai i te whakaaro nui. He tino noa ia. He pai te hononga kare ā-roto o kōrua tokorua. He aha ia i tawhiti ai i te wā ohorere? Nā te whakaaro nui i roto i a koe i puta ai te mamae mutunga kore. He hē te huna i tētahi tangata, me te kore whakautu ki ā rātou karere kuputuhi. 

Ehara i te mea ko ia anake. He tini ngā tāne e wehe atu ana ina kite rātou kei te kino haere ngā mea. He hua ngā tāne nō te mana rangatira pērā i a tātou katoa. He uaua ki a rātou te whakatū whanaungatanga me te whai i tēnā me te ngākau ngoikore me te pono, me te whakapuaki i ō rātou kare ā-roto me ō rātou wehi. Koinei te huarahi i whakatipu ai tātou i a rātou, koia te take e wehe atu ai ngā tāne i muri i te tata atu.

9 Ngā Take e Wehe ai ngā Tāne i mua i tā rātou Whakaaetanga 

He aha te take e wehe atu ai te tāne i muri i tana whakaatu i tōna hiahia ki a koe? I haria kōrua e ia ki ētahi wā. I whakapuaki i ngā ngoikoretanga o tētahi ki tētahi, i kōrero mō ngā take whakarērea, ā, i hono atu ki ētahi atu wāhanga o te pakeketanga o te kare ā-roto. Heoi, ko te wehe ohorere atu o tētahi tāne tētahi o ngā tohu kāore ia i rite mōna. he whanaungatanga pakekeTērā pea he maha ngā take e puta ai tēnei wehenga. Pānuihia ngā take maha i raro nei mō te take e mawehe atu ai ngā tāne, e noho tawhiti atu ai hoki ina kite rātou i tētahi hononga ngākau nui e huri ana hei hononga pumau. 

1. Kāore anō ia kia wareware ki ana whanaungatanga o mua 

Koinei tētahi o ngā tino take e wehe atu ai ngā tāne i muri i te ārahi i a koe. Kei te whakararuraru tonu tētahi o ana whanaungatanga o mua i a ia. Tērā pea nā te mea i wehe rāua, kāore anō kia oti te whakatau, nā te mea rānei kāore anō ia kia wareware ki tana hoa o mua. Te uaua o te neke whakamua me te kore he mutunga Ka pā kino pea tēnei ki te oranga hinengaro o te tangata. Tērā pea kua wareware ia ki tana hoa o mua engari kei te mau tonu te mamae i puta mai i a ia. Kei te whai tonu tana mamae o mua i a ia, ā, kāore e taea e ia te neke atu. Koia pea i whakaaro ai ia he pai ake te whakamutu i te wā tōmua o te whanaungatanga, kaua e whakamutu i muri i te urunga ki tētahi whanaungatanga pumau. 

Tērā pea he uaua ki a ia te whakaatu i tōna āhua pai, kia kore e pehi i a ia anō ki a koe. E mōhio ana rātou he hē tēnei ki a koe anō hoki, ā, koinei te take he maha ngā wā ka mawehe atu ai ngā tāne. I tēnei horopaki, me waiho ia e koe ina mawehe atu ia. Kāore koe e whakarērea ana, e whakarērea ana rānei ia. Engari he mārama kei a ia ngā whakaaro hei whakarite anō me ngā kare ā-roto hei tukatuka ko ia anake. 

2. He mea noa iho koe hei takahurihuri 

He aha te take e wehe atu ai te tāne i muri i tana whakaari i a ia e hiahia ana ki a koe? Nā te mea ko koe anake tana hoa whakaora. E mōhio ana mātou he pire kawa anō tēnei māu hei horomia, engari koinei tētahi o ngā take e wehe atu ai ngā tāne i muri i te noho tahi me tētahi. Ehara i te mea ngāwari te whakaae he rongoā noa iho koe i tahaetia e ia i muri i tana wareware i tana hoa o mua. Pērā i ētahi atu tāngata, tera pea i whakaaro ia ko te huarahi pai ki te wareware i tētahi ko te huna i tētahi hoa hou. Kaua e pouri. He tika ki a koe tētahi e kore rawa e whakamahi i a koe hei wareware i tētahi atu. 

Teie te tahi ngā tohu he mea whakaora noa iho koe mōna:

• Kāore i roa te wā i pahemo i waenganui i tana wehenga me tana tīmatanga o tētahi hononga aroha ki a koe 
• Kāore i te mārama tana kōrero mō te take o tana wehenga
• Ko te arotahi matua o tō whanaungatanga ki a ia he whanaungatanga tinana noa iho, he iti noa iho te whanaungatanga kare ā-roto.
• Kāore ia i te wātea i ngā wā katoa
• I kōrero tonu ia mō tana hoa o mua 

Te pānui e pā ana: 11 Ngā Akoranga i Akohia e te Tangata mai i ngā Hononga i Rahua

3. E wehi ana ia i te whakapau kaha 

He aha ngā tāne ka wehe atu i a rātou ina aroha ana? Ahakoa kei reira te aroha, ā, he pono, he āhua tawhiti rawa te whanaungatanga. Ehara i te mea nā te mea kāore rātou e pai ki a koe, e aro rānei ki a koe. Tērā pea nā te mea kāore anō rātou kia rite mō te whanaungatanga pumau. Ka haere te tāne i ngā wāhanga katoa o te whakaipoipo engari ka tū ia ka huri i te huarahi ina kite ia kua tata ia ki te uru ki te ara o te whakapau kaha. Ko te tikanga, nā te mea kāore ia i te whakahaere i ōna ake kare ā-roto, ā, kei te tuku ia i tōna wehi ki te whakapau kaha kia whakahaere i a ia. Kimihia ngā huarahi ki te mahi tahi me te tangata kāore anō kia rite ki te whakapau kaha mā te hoatu wāhi ki a ia.

He nui te kaha e hiahiatia ana mō te whanaungatanga mēnā e hiahia ana te tangata ki te mahi tika. Ahakoa he pai tonu te whakapau kaha, kāore ētahi tāne i te rite ki te huri i taua momo noho. He ataahua te kawe mai i tētahi tangata hou ki roto i tō ao me te aroha ki a rātou i ia rā i te tirohanga atu engari he nui te mahi mēnā kāore te tangata i te rite, i te hiahia rānei ki te mahi. He pai ake te noho takakau i te noho i roto i te whanaungatanga haurua-matotoru. 

4. Ka tīmata ia te āhua hemo 

Koinei tētahi o ngā take maha e wehe atu ai ngā tāne ina tīmata ana te hopu i ngā kare ā-roto. I pai ia ki a koe, ā, koia te take i whakatau ai ia ki te noho tahi me koe. Heoi, ināianei kua tīmata ia ki te pōuri. Ia te āhua kua mauheretia i roto i te whanaungatanga ā, kātahi ka noho puku koe, ka whakaaro koe mēnā kāore koe i te pai mōna. Kaua e whakapae i a koe anō mō ​​tēnā.

Me i pōuri ia, kua taea e ia te whakapuaki i ana āwangawanga, me te waiho i aua āwangawanga kia taea ai e koe te tātari me te aromatawai. Kāore e taea e tō hoa aroha te momotu i ō hononga nā te mea i pōuri ia. Me kōrero ia ki a koe i mua i te mahi i tētahi mahi nui pēnei. I tika kia mutu tō kōrero.

5. E mataku ana ia kei whara anō 

Ka taea e ngā mamae o mua te whakarerekē i te tirohanga a ngā tāne ki ō rātou whanaungatanga ā muri ake nei. Kāore e taea e te katoa te neke whakamua i te pēhitanga o ō rātou ringaringa. Heoi, kua waiho koe e tēnei kia pōhēhē. Nā tēnei kua iti tō whakaaro ki a koe anō. Ina wehe atu te tāne i muri i te whakaae e pai ana ia ki a koe, kei te whakamahi noa ia i tana tikanga tiaki hei tiaki i a ia anō. Nā te mea kei te wehi ia kei ruku ki te wai, kei toremi. He mārama he take tēnei o māharahara dating.

Nā, he aha te take e roa ai te wā e whakapau kaha ai ngā tāne ki te whakapau kaha? Nā te mea ina haumi te tangata, ā, ka tino aroha, tera pea ka hē ngā mea, ka whara hoki. Ko ētahi tāne e mataku ana ki ō rātou wheako o mua, kāore e taea e rātou te hoki anō ki te mahi. Kei te huna e ia ōna kare ā-roto pono mā te wehe atu me te mahi me te mea kāore he mea nui ki a ia tēnei whanaungatanga. 

Te pānui e pā ana: Te Whakaipoipo mō ngā Marama e Toru? Ngā Mea hei Tumanako me ngā Mea hei Mōhio

6. Kāore āna whāinga ā muri ake nei i rite ki āu

Ahakoa kei roto kōrua i te pokapū o tētahi hui whakahihiri i tēnei wā, tera pea he rerekē rawa ā kōrua mahere ā muri ake nei. Tērā pea kei te whakaaro kōrua ki te neke atu i te tāone nui, kei te rapu rānei ia i tētahi momo momo noho rerekē. Ko tāna e hiahia ana ko tētahi wahine e ōrite ana āna whāinga ki ngā āhuatanga katoa o tōna ao tae atu ki ngā āhuatanga ngaio me ngā āhuatanga whaiaro. Ina hiahiatia ēnei kōwhiringa whakatau, tera pea kei te āwangawanga tō tāne mō ngā mea kei te heke mai. Hei whakatau i tōna heke mai hei mea nui, ā, kia kore ai e ārahi noa i a koe, tera pea ka kore ia e whakaae. Kua mōhio pea ia ko tana whāinga hononga Kāore kōrua e taurite ki tāu, ā, kei te mahi ia i tēnei nā te mea kei te wehewehe pea ō kōrua ara i te heke mai. Kāore ia e hiahia kia noho tonu kōrua ki ngā tumanako teka. 

E kī ana a Lisa, he kaipānui pukapuka Bonobology nō Niu Ioka, "He tino ataahua taku whanaungatanga ki tētahi tangata i pai ki ahau te taha tōrangapū, te taha hinengaro me te taha kare ā-roto. I whakatau māua kia wehe i muri i te mōhio kāore māua i te ōrite ki te taha whenua, ā, kāore anō māua kia rite mō te whanaungatanga tawhiti. He mamae, he uaua hoki ki te whakaora, engari e mōhio ana ahau koinei te whakatau pai rawa atu mā māua. I te putanga mai o te kiriata, La La Land, i kite ahau i te nui o taku pānga ki te kaupapa o ngā tāngata e rua e tika ana mō rāua engari kāore e taea te noho tahi."

7. Ka tere rawa te haere o te pakitara 

E mōhio ana koe ki te aha ka tupu ina tere rawa te neke o tētahi whanaungatanga? Ka pakaru, ka mura. He maha ngā wā ka mataku ngā tāne i te whakaaro o te hohoro ki te uru atu ki tētahi whanaungatanga. Kei te whakaipoipo koe i tētahi rā, ā, i muri i ngā wiki e toru kua whakatau koe ki te neke tahi. He tere rawa tēnā, he wawe rawa. He maha ngā tāne e manukanuka ana mēnā he mea pai rawa tēnei kia pono, ā, ka mataku rātou i tēnei. 

Ka panaia koe e ngā tāne ina pāngia rātou e te ahotea mō te tere o te whanaungatanga, ā, e hiahia ana rātou ki te whai wā ki te whakatau i ngā manukanuka hou mō te whanaungatanga. Ina wehe atu te tāne, kia pēhea te roa? He uaua ki te tohu i tētahi wā. Kei te roa o te wā e hiahiatia ana kia mārama ai ia, kia tae atu ai ki tētahi whakatau mō tāna e hiahia ana. Kei a koe te whakatau mēnā he pai ki a ia te tatari me te manawanui. 

8. Kei te arotake ia i ana kōwhiringa 

He aha te tikanga o tēnā, e pātai ana koe? Ko te tikanga ehara ko koe anake te tangata e kite ana ia i tēnei wā. He mea pouri tēnei engari ki te tere ake tō mārama ki tēnei, ka māmā ake te neke atu. I te paunatia noa e ia āna kōwhiringa, ā, ko koe tana te tangata aroha tūmatanuiI pai ake ia ki te kōtiro kē atu, ā, i whiriwhiria e ia. He mamae, engari ko wai e hiahia ana ki tētahi tāne e whakaaro ana ki a koe hei kōwhiringa tuarua māna? Kāore he tangata! He mea pouri, engari koinei anō te take e wehe atu ai ngā tāne i ā rātou hoa. Me whakarite e koe te mea nui ki a koe i konei, kaua e tatari kia whakatau ia. 

E kī ana a Dina, he kaiwhakatakoto kai 28-tau te pakeke nō Minnesota, ""I te rua o ngā marama o tā māua whakaipoipo ka mōhio ahau kei te kite ia i ētahi atu tāngata. I ohorere ahau i tana noho noa iho mō tēnei mea. Ae, i wātea ia ki te whakaipoipo i ētahi atu tāngata, engari me kī mai ki ahau mai i te tīmatanga. Ka pāngia hoki tōku hauora moepuku. He mahi tino kore aro, he mahi whakahāwea ira tangata hoki tāna." 

9. Kei te aro atu ia ki ngā raruraru whaiaro 

Tērā pea he raruraru mātua, he ahotea mahi, he pouri rānei, he waipiro, he manukanuka rānei. He maha ngā raruraru o ngā tāne kāore pea e whakakitea ki a koe. Nō reira, tērā pea kāore koe i te mōhio ki ngā raruraru whakamataku e pāngia ana e ia. Tērā pea ka puta mai ēnei hei ngā tautohetohe i roto i tō whanaungatanga.

Mā te tāne tika e kōrero ki a koe ngā raruraru katoa e pā ana ki a ia. E tumanako ana hoki ia kia tū tana wahine ki tōna taha i ngā wā pai, i ngā wā pōuri. Engari i te whakapuaki i ana raruraru ki a koe, i whakatau ia ki te whakatau i ngā mea māna ake mā te wehe atu. Kei te wehe atu tāu tāne nā te mea he kaupapa matua kē atu āna e hiahia ana ki tōna wā me tōna aro.

Me aha ia ina neke atu ia 

He maha ngā take rerekē, koretake, me te tika e wehe atu ai ngā tāne i ā rātou hoa, e waiho ana i a rātou kia noho tahanga. I roto i te wā whakaipoipo, tera pea ka whakaatu tō tāne i ngā whanonga rerekē ka whakapoauau i a koe. Ka taea e ia te whakahou me te whakarihariha. Tērā pea ka pātai koe, he aha ngā tāne ka wehe atu i mua i te herenga? Ina tīmata te tāne ki te wehe atu me te kore whakatūpato, tera pea he wā e whakaohooho ana i te manukanuka mōu. Kei roto koe i ngā whakaaro koretake me ngā kare ā-roto manukanuka. Anei ētahi whakautu ki ngā mea ka taea e koe te mahi ina wehe atu ngā tāne i ngā whanaungatanga;

Te pānui e pā ana: 12 Ngā Tumanakotanga Tuturu i roto i te Hononga

1. Kaua e mahi tere 

Koinei tētahi o ngā mahi kino rawa atu a ngā wāhine ina tīmata te tāne e pai ana ki a rātou ki te mahi tawhiti. Āraia te whakamatautauranga ki te pātai ki a ia he aha te hē. Noho tonu ki tō aratau zen, kaua e mahi tere. E mōhio ana mātou he uaua ki a koe te whakaae ki ngā mea kāore he mutunga engari koia tonu te āhua. 

He nui te tūponotanga ka hoki mai ia ina mōhio ia i hē ia mā te mahi me te mea kāore ia e aro ki a koe. Tērā pea kua tino teitei rawa atu ōna taumata ahotea i tēnei wā, me te whakaaro me pēhea e taea ai e ia te whakatika i tēnei. Mēnā ko koe kia ngaro koe i a ia ā, ka hoki mai koe ki a koe, kaua e akiaki i a ia kia kōrero ki a koe. 

2. Kaua e inoi kia hoki mai ia 

Me pēhea te whai uara nui ina wehe atu ia? Kaua rawa e inoi kia hoki mai ia ki tō ao. Ka meinga koe e tēnei kia tino pouri i te ara i inoi ai koe kia noho mai tētahi ki tō ao. Me noho tonu te tangata ki a koe, me aroha hoki ki a koe nā te mea e aroha ana ia ki a koe.

Ina inoi koe ki tō hoa o mua kia hoki mai ki tō ao, tera pea ka hoki mai anō rātou. Heoi, ka tīmata rātou ki te whakahawea ki a koe, ā, e kore rawa rātou e whakaute i a koe. Whakaarohia pēnei: ​​mehemea i aroha ia ki a koe, kua noho tonu ia ahakoa ngā uauatanga. Kāore koe e hiahia ki tētahi kāore e hiahia ana ki a koe.

3. Karangatia tana whanonga 

Ko ngā tāne e wehe atu ana i a rātou anō ina kite rātou kei te aroha ki tētahi, kāore i te taunga ki te whakahēngia mō ā rātou whanonga. Ki tā rātou he wā whakamiharo te kimi hoa rangatira, kāore e hiahiatia kia tū atu ki a koe, kia kōrerotia te take o te wehenga. Tukuna he karere, kia mōhio ai ia. te huna i roto i te whanaungatanga kāore i te pai. 

Hoatu he wāhi ki a ia, kaua hoki e tuku karere kuputuhi ki a ia i ia meneti e rima. Kotahi noa te karere hei whakamōhio i a ia ki tana hapa. Kaua e tono kia tūtaki ia ki a koe, kia inu kawhe rānei māua, me kī noa he hē tana mahi. Ko te nuinga o ngā wāhine ka hē mā te tuku i ngā tāne kia whakaaro ka taea e rātou te haere mai, te haere atu i ngā wā katoa e hiahia ana rātou. Kaua e tukua kia takahia koe e rātou. 

4. Kaua e tukua kia pā tēnei ki tō whakaaro nui ki a koe anō 

Ka pātai a Jenny, he kaipānui pukapuka Bonobology nō West Virginia, "Ina wehe atu ia, me aha ia me te mamae me te riri?". Ina wehe atu te tangata, ā, ka mahi ia me te mea kāore ia e aro ki a koe, kaua e tukua kia pā ki tō whakaaro nui me tō whakaaro nui ki a koe anō. Mena kua tupu kē tēnei, kei a koe tonu te wā ki te arotahi i tō kaha katoa ki te hanga anō i a koe anō.

Ka tino pōuri koe mō tēnei mea, ā, ka pātai nui koe ki a koe anō. Kaua e tukua kia pau koe i tēnei mea. Ko te nuinga o ngā tāne whakahihi e hiahia ana kia tupu tēnei mea. E hiahia ana rātou kia tangihia rātou e ngā wāhine i piri tahi rātou, ā, i wehe atu rātou, me te pātai i tō rātou mana ake. Tangihia tēnei mea. Kaua e tukua kia hinga koe i tēnei mea. 

Te pānui e pā ana: Ngā Mea Hei Mahi Ina Wehe Atu Ia – Te Rautaki Tino Pai e 8-Hipanga

5. Whakahaerehia ō hiahia kino

Tērā pea ka hiahia koe ki te whai i ngā whanonga tino kino i tēnei wā. Ko tētahi tohutohu motuhake mā mātou ko te karo i ēnei kare ā-roto, kaua hoki e tukua kia whakahaere i a koe. Kimihia me pēhea te wikitoria i tō wehenga me te kore e tukua kia kino ki a koe. Anei ētahi mea me mōhio koe i a koe e pāngia ana e te pouri, te pouri, me te ahotea o te wehenga:

• Āta karohia te inu nui rawa
• Kaua e whakaaro ki te tango i tetahi rongoā hei whakaiti i tō mamae
• Kaua e kōrero noa mōna 
• Kaua e uru ki ngā whanonga whara i a koe anō me te whakangaro i a koe anō 

Ki te kore tonu e taea e koe te neke atu i tēnei, rapua he āwhina ngaio. I Bonobology, ka tukuna e mātou he āwhina ngaio mā roto i ā mātou rōpū kaitohutohu raihana ko wai ka taea te āwhina i a koe ki te tīmata i te ara ki te whakaoranga. 

6. Whakamahia te aroha ki a koe ano 

Kia pai koe ki a koe anō. Whakaarohia pēnei. Mēnā ka pā mai tētahi mea pēnei ki tō hoa pai, ki tō tuahine rānei, ka tukua rānei e koe kia takahuri rātou ki te aroha ki a ia anō me te mamae? Whakaaturia te āwangawanga kotahi ki a koe anō mā te whakapau kaha ki te whakaae ki ngā mea kua pā mai. Whakautehia koe, ā, whiriwhiria tō harikoa hei wikitoria i tēnei mamae ngākau.

Kei raro nei ētahi tohutohu āwhina mō me pehea te aroha ki a koe ano:

• Puritia he pukapuka whakawhetai. Tuhia ngā mea katoa e whakawhetai ana koe, me ngā mea katoa i pakaru ai tō ngākau. 
• Kia manawanui. Kaua e tukua ō āwangawanga kia piki rawa. Hangaia anō tō whakaaro nui mā te mihi ki a koe anō. Tīmata ki te "He tino kaha ahau, kāore au i tuku i ōku kare ā-roto kia whakahaere i ahau". Whakamihi atu ki a koe anō i ia rā, i ia rā.
• Whakaharatauhia te aroātea. He tini ngā taupānga kei reira ka taea e koe te tango mai me te ako me pēhea te aroātea ake. 
• Whakakorikori tinana i ngā wā katoa. Kia ora, kia kai hauora hoki. Kāore he mea atu e meinga ai te hoa o mua kia rite ki te mea kua ngaro te poti moemoeā ina kite i te tinana rapu utu o tana hoa o mua. 
• Whakawhanakehia he mahi whakangahau hou, hoki atu rānei ki ō mahi whakangahau tawhito i ēnei wā pōhēhē. Tērā pea ka kitea e koe he whakamarie i roto i aua mahi whakangahau.
• Whakatikatikahia tō ngākau mā te haere anō ki ngā wā whakatā. Ka taea anō e koe hinga anō ki te aroha me tētahi, ā, ka noho ēnei katoa hei maharatanga tawhiti 

Ki te tīmata koe ki te whakaaro kei te tawhiti tō hoa tāne, kōrero ki a ia i te wā tonu ka kite koe kei te hē tetahi mea. Ko ngā tāne e mawehe atu ana ka hoki mai anō. Nāu te whakatau inaianei mēnā e hiahia ana koe ki a ia kia hoki mai, kāore rānei. Mēnā he take tika tāna mō tēnei, kāore he kino ki te hoatu anō i tētahi atu whai wāhitanga ki a ia. Heoi, ki te mea he take kuware tana mawehe atu, kāore ia e tika ana kia whiwhi i tētahi kuīni pērā i a koe.

FAQs

5 Ngā Tohu e Whakahē Ana Ia I A Koe Mō Tētahi Atu

12 Ngā Mea e Mahihia ana e ngā Wahine e Whakangaro ai i ngā Marenatanga

6 Ngā Take e Whakahē ai te Tāne i a Koe i Muri i te Pakanga, Me Ngā Mea e 5 Ka Taea e Koe te Mahi

Kāore tō koha e kiia he kaupapa aroha takohaMā tēnei ka taea e Bonobology te kawe mai i ngā mōhiotanga hou me ngā mōhiotanga hou ki a koe i roto i tā mātou whainga ki te āwhina i te tangata katoa o te ao ki te ako me pēhea te mahi i tetahi mea.