Ndimakondabe Ex Wanga: Ndi Zabwinobwino Ndipo Zotani Ngati Mukumva Motere?

Kusweka kungakhale kovuta kwambiri, ndipo kudzipeza mukunong'onezana "Ndimakondabe mkazi wanga wakale" mu mphindi zopanda phokoso ndizodabwitsa kwambiri. Mutha kugona nthawi ya 2 koloko m'mawa ndikuseweranso zokumbukira zakale, kapena kumva mfundo m'mimba nthawi iliyonse mukawona malo omwe munkachezera limodzi. Maganizo amenewa akhoza kukuchititsani kudzifunsa kuti, “Kodi n’zachibadwa kukondabe mkazi wanga wakale?” ndi "Chifukwa chiyani ndimamukondabe wakale wanga, ngakhale zitachitika zonsezi?" Yankho loona mtima ndi inde - anthu ambiri amadutsa mu izi. 

Izo sizikutanthauza kuti chinachake chalakwika ndi inu. Zimangotanthauza kuti mumasamala kwambiri, ndipo mtima wanu umafunika nthawi kuti muchire. M'nkhaniyi, tikuwonetsani chifukwa chake zili zachilengedwe, ngati zowawa, gawo lakutha, komanso kukupatsani mphamvu ndi malingaliro othandiza kuti mupite patsogolo. Ganizirani izi ngati bwenzi lothandizira lomwe likukhala pansi kuti likuthandizeni kuthana ndi malingaliro ovuta a "Ndimakonda wakale wanga" ndikuganizira zomwe mungachite.

Ndimakondabe Ex Wanga Nkhani ya Alex 

Alex, wazaka 24, wakhala akuvutika kwambiri kuyambira pamene Jamie yemwe anakhala naye kwa zaka zinayi, anaganiza zosiyana naye. Awiriwa adali limodzi kuyambira ku koleji. Panthawiyi, kucheza kwapakati pausiku, maulendo a kumapeto kwa sabata, komanso maloto omwe amagawana nawo zakhala gawo lachibadwidwe la Alex moti ngakhale miyezi isanu ndi umodzi chibwenzi chitatha, amamva kuti alibe kanthu m'moyo wake. 

Kusudzulana kunali kosokoneza; panali misozi ndi mikangano. Kuchokera ku buluu, kapena zomwe zinkamveka ngati Alex, Jamie adanena kuti akumva ngati wasintha ndikuthetsa zinthu. Patatha miyezi ingapo, Alex anayesa kusuntha ndikubwereranso pachibwenzi. Anapitanso pamasiku ndikuyamba kuonana ndi munthu watsopano miyezi ingapo pambuyo pake. Pankhope pake, zikuwoneka ngati zonse zili bwino, akupita patsogolo, tsiku limodzi, sitepe imodzi panthawi. Koma, usiku, nthawi zambiri amadzipeza akuganiza kuti, "Ndimakonda bwenzi langa lakale." Kapena mwakachetechete, amadzifunsa kuti, “Ndimakondabe mkazi wanga wakale, chifukwa chiyani sindingathe kuwaiwala?” 

Amabwera kawirikawiri ku cafe komwe iye ndi Jamie ankapitako Lamlungu m'mawa. Fungo la khofi ndi lomweli, ndipo sayembekezera kuti amuone atakhala patebulo lanu lakale. Nthawi zina, amafufuza zithunzi za tchuthi chawo chomaliza pamodzi, akulakalaka zinthu zitasintha. Pa tsiku lovuta, amalakalaka kumutumizira uthenga kapena kumvetsera "nyimbo yawo" mobwerezabwereza. Pakati pa zonsezi, pali kudzimva kuti sanachite chilungamo kwa wokondedwa wake watsopano. Funso lakuti, "N'chifukwa chiyani ndikukondabe wakale wanga pomwe ndili ndi chibwenzi chatsopano tsopano ?", limamudya mkati. Zili ngati kuti akunyenga wokondedwa wake ndi munthu amene salinso m'moyo wake.

Kudziimba mlandu, kusokonezeka maganizo, ndi kusagwirizana kumeneku kumakhala kofala kwambiri pamene munthu akulimbana ndi kusweka mtima. Alex atagawana nkhani yake ndi Bonobology, katswiri wa zamaganizo Dr. Aman Bhonsle adamuyankha kuti, "Mkanganowu si wachilendo. Pambuyo pake, pali zovuta zambiri zogonjetsa munthu wina akachoka m'moyo wanu, koma zoona zake n'zakuti, ubongo wanu suli wotchipa. Sizimangozimitsidwa chifukwa ubale unatha. Zaka zonsezi za zochitika zosawerengeka sizikusowa ndipo zimasowa. " 

Zambiri zitha kubweranso: nyimbo ina yomwe ikuseweredwa pawailesi, fungo, kapena tsiku lokumbukira chaka. Panthawi imeneyo, mumamva kukoka, kutentha kwachikondi komwe sikunasinthe, ndipo mukhoza kuganiza kuti, "Ndimamukondabe mkazi wanga wakale, tinali ndi mgwirizano waukulu ..." Zimakhala zowawa komanso zosokoneza, makamaka ngati mukuyesera kupanga china chatsopano kapena kupita patsogolo.

Mfundo yake ndi yakuti, iyi ndi nkhani ya anthu ambiri. Simuli nokha mu izi. Anthu ambiri amene anasudzulana amapeza kuti m’milungu, miyezi, kapena zaka zingapo pambuyo pake, mbali zina za iwo zimakakamirabe muubwenzi wakale. Zili ngati kukhala ndi phazi limodzi kunja kwa chitseko ndipo phazi limodzi likadali mkati mwa chiyanjano. Mutha kudzifunsa nthawi zonse: "Kodi ndidzatha kuthana ndi wakale wanga?" "Kodi ine ndekha ndikumva chonchi?" Dr. Bhonsle anati: “Kumva ngati zimenezi n’kwachibadwa munthu akataya munthu amene munali naye pachibwenzi. Zimenezi zimachititsa kuti munthu ayambe kuchira ndipo m’kupita kwa nthawi zingachepe ngati mutachitapo kanthu kuti musamavutike komanso kusiya pang’onopang’ono.”

Kuwerenga Kofanana: Zifukwa 9 Zomulepheretsa Wakale Wanu Ndi Zinthu 5 Zomwe Mungachite Pa Izi

Kodi Ndi Bwino Kukondabe Ex Wanga?

Mwamtheradi, inde. Zingakhale zochititsa mantha kapena zochititsa manyazi kuvomereza, koma akatswiri ambiri a zaubwenzi amatsimikizira kuti kusonyeza chikondi kwa mwamuna kapena mkazi wakale n'kwachibadwa. Katswiri wa zamaganizo, Ernesto Lira de la Rosa anati: “Ngati umakondabe munthu amene wayamba kale ntchito, zimenezo n’zabwinobwino. 

Ganizirani izi ngati kumva chisoni chakutaika kwina kulikonse. Monga momwe mungamvere chisoni imfa ya wokondedwa yemwe wamwalira, kuthetsa ubale waukulu kumayambitsa kuyankha kofananako komanso ngakhale thupi. Malingaliro anu adzasintha, koma mpaka pamenepo, ndi bwino kudzipatsa chipiriro ndi kumvetsetsa. M'munsimu muli mfundo zofunika kukumbukira chifukwa chake izi zimachitika:

• Zokumbukira za "masiku akale": Inu ndi wakale wanu munapanga mbiri yogawana: mkati mwa nthabwala, malo omwe mumakonda, nthawi zachifundo. Malingaliro anu mwachibadwa amasumika pa zikumbukiro zosangalatsa ndi kupeputsa zoipazo. Pamene kukumbukira kuchedwa, kumakhala kosavuta kupitiriza kukonda munthu wogwirizana naye. Pamenepo, nostalgia mwina ayigkukumbukira zabwino ndi kukuiwalitsa zoipa. Mwachitsanzo, mutha kubwereza nthawi ngati kuseka limodzi, koma osati ndewu, zomwe zimapangitsa kuti yemwe kale anali kale azimva kuti ndi wabwino
• Mukukonzekerabe kuluza: Kuthetsa chibwenzi ndikutaya gawo la moyo wanu watsiku ndi tsiku ndi mapulani amtsogolo. Kafukufuku akuwonetsa kuti pafupifupi, zimatha kutenga zaka 4 kuti theka la mgwirizano wamalingaliro uzizire. Anthu ena samasiya konse kumva kulumikizana. Kotero kuti inu mukugwirabe ndi zachilendo. Mukumvetsa chisoni mapeto a zomwe poyamba zinali zofunika
• Mukufuna kudziwa: Anthu amapangidwa kuti agwirizane. Ubongo wanu umazolowera chizolowezi choyimbirana foni, kutumizirana mameseji, ndi kumuona munthuyo tsiku lililonse. Izi zikayima, zimapanga mpweya. Zili ngati kulakalaka chitonthozo cha chizoloŵezi chakale. Dr. Bhonsle anati: “Ubongo wako umathanso kumva kuti ukuchoka pa kugwirizana kumene kunalipo, choncho thupi ndi maganizo ako zimakankhira maganizo amenewo patali.”
• Simuli wosweka kapena wofooka: Kumverera kwa munthu wakale si chizindikiro cha kufooka kapena kusweka. Zimangotanthauza kuti mumawakonda kwambiri. Anthu ambiri, ngakhale patapita zaka zambiri, amanena zinthu monga “Ndimamukondabe” kapena “Sindingathe kusiya kumuganizira.” Ikhoza kukhala wosungulumwa, koma ndizochitika zofala kwambiri

Ndipo inde, pamapeto pake mudzachira. Zomverera zamphamvu sizikhala mpaka kalekale. M’kupita kwa nthawi, mphamvuyo imachepa. Kumbukirani kuti kumverera motere kumatanthauza kuti ndinu munthu ndipo mungathe kukonda. Zimangotanthawuza kuti mwatsala pang'ono kutha kuchira. 

Kuwerenga Kofanana: Kodi Kutanthauza Chiyani Kulota za Wakale Wanu?

Momwe Mungapitirizire Ex Mumakondabe - Malangizo 7

Tsopano popeza tavomereza malingaliro awa ngati abwinobwino, tiyeni tikambirane zomwe mungachite kuti muyambe kupita patsogolo. Ulendowu utenga nthawi, ndipo si wolunjika. Padzakhala masiku abwino ndi masiku oipa. Koma pali njira zenizeni zomwe mungachite kuti muchepetse ululu ndikusiya. Tikubweretsa malangizo 7 otere othandizidwa ndi akatswiri kuti akuthandizeni kutenga sitepe yoyamba yosiya munthu amene mumamukonda . Kumbukirani kupita pa liwiro lanu, ndikudalira njira zomwe zikukuyenderani bwino.

1. Tsatirani pa netiweki yanu yothandizira

Pamene mtima wanu ukupweteka, kudzipatula kungapangitse zinthu kukhala zovuta kwambiri. Thandizo lanu ndi lofunika kwambiri mukatha kusudzulana . Angamvetsere, kukusokonezani, kapena kungokhala nanu chete. Mwachitsanzo, mungaimbire foni mnzanu wapamtima ndi kunena kuti, “Ndili ndi tsiku lovuta kwambiri,” ndikungotulutsa mawu kapena kulira. Izi si zongotaya mtima, koma ndi njira yabwino yotulutsira mawu. Dr. Bhonsle akugogomezera kuti, “Kulumikizana ndi ena kudzakupangitsani kukhala osungulumwa kwambiri. Pakadali pano, ndikulangiza mwamphamvu aliyense amene akulimbana ndi malingaliro okhalitsa kuti ayesere kupanga mabwenzi atsopano kapena kudalira omwe alipo. Landirani chiitano chilichonse chochezera ndi anthu chomwe mungathe ndipo pitani kumeneko.” Chifukwa chake,

• Funsani munthu amene mumamukhulupirira ndikunena kuti mukuvutika
• Lowani nawo kalabu, kalasi, kapena gulu lothandizira pa intaneti, ngakhale subreddit kapena forum, kuti mulankhule ndi anthu omwe amapeza
• Ngati anzanu akuitanani, ganizirani kupita ngakhale simukufuna. Kukhala pafupi ndi anthu okoma mtima kumatha kusintha malingaliro anu

Izi zimagwiranso ntchito ngati mukulimbana ndi liwongo komanso chisokonezo pazochitika monga, "Ndili pachibwenzi koma ndimamukondabe wakale wanga." Ngakhale mutakhala ndi mnzanu watsopano, lankhulani ndi anzanu za momwe mukumvera. Nthawi zina kungomva kuti, “Ndakhalapo ndipo mukhala bwino,” kungakhale kotonthoza modabwitsa. Kulumikizana ndi netiweki yanu yothandizira kumakupatsani malingaliro atsopano ndikukukumbutsani za chikondi chonse m'moyo wanu.

2. Lolani kuti mumve chisoni, koma dziikireni malire

Ndizachibadwa kufuna kulira ndi kukhumudwa mutathetsa chibwenzi. Lolani kuti mukhale achisoni komanso okwiya kwa kanthawi. Izi ndi malingaliro enieni komanso gawo la njira yochira kusudzulana . Ndipotu, katswiri wa zamaganizo Pella Weisman anati, "Kusudzulana kungakhale kopweteka mtima ndipo muyenera kudzilola kumva ululu m'malo moubisa." Zingathandize kuonera mafilimu achisoni kwambiri kapena kudya ayisikilimu wotonthoza kwa tsiku limodzi kapena awiri. Lolani kuti mutuluke ndipo musadzichititse manyazi chifukwa cha misozi kapena chisoni.

Komabe, ndikofunikanso kuti musamangokhalira kumva ululu mpaka kalekale. Dr. Bhonsle akulangiza kuti, “Ngakhale kuli koyenera kukhala masiku angapo mukungolira ndi kukhala ndi malingaliro anu, muyenera kudzipatsa nthaŵi: mwinamwake mlungu umodzi wodumphadumpha, ndiyeno yang’anani pa masitepe ang’onoang’ono kuti mubwerere m’njira yoyenera.

Kuwerenga Kofanana: Kodi Kubwerera M'mbuyo Kumakupangitsani Kusowa Kwambiri Wakale Wanu - Dziwani Apa

3. Landirani zenizeni za kutha kwa banja

Chimodzi mwazinthu zovuta kwambiri ndikuvomereza kuti ubale watha. Mutha kukhalabe ndi chiyembekezo kapena kuganiza kuti, "Mwina asintha malingaliro awo." Koma kuvomereza n’kofunika. Mphunzitsi wa maubwenzi a Trina Leckie akuti, "Ngati simukuvomereza chifukwa chomwe munasudzulana, mumakhala mukukana, zomwe zimangowonjezera kuchira kwanu." 

Dzikumbutseni zifukwa zonse zomwe zinapangitsa kuti banjali liziyenda bwino. Nthawi zambiri, anthu amangoganizira za "Ndimakonda wakale wanga" ndikunyalanyaza mavuto omwe adayambitsa kupatukana. Yesetsani kukumbukira mbendera zofiira zilizonse kapena zovuta zomwe zidalipo. Ngati chinali chisankho chanu kapena chawo, dzikumbutseni kuti anthu amagwa mchikondi ndikupita patsogolo, zimachitika kwa aliyense. 

Kuvomereza zenizeni sizitanthauza kuti musiye kuwakonda nthawi yomweyo, koma zidzakupatsani chidziwitso chomveka bwino kuti chibwenzicho chinatha ndipo sichinakonzedwe, mosasamala kanthu kuti mumasamala bwanji. Kuvomereza kumeneku kudzakuthandizani kutaya chikondi kwa wakale wanu. Ngati nthawi zambiri mumadzifunsa kuti, “ Kodi ndidzathetsa chibwenzi cha wakale wanga ?”, nazi njira zingapo zomwe zingathandize:

• Ayi "ngati-ngati." Siyani kubwereza zinthu ngati “Ndikadanena izi…” Vomerezani kuti zinthu zina sizinali m'manja mwanu komanso kuti nonse munathandizira kuti zidatha bwanji.
• Pewani kuwapanga kukhala angwiro. Ndikwachibadwa kukumbukira zinthu zabwino, koma yesani kuzilinganiza mwa kukumbukira chifukwa chake sizinagwire ntchito. Lembani mndandanda wa zabwino ndi zoyipa za ubalewu. Khalani owona mtima pazolakwa
• Kumbukirani kuti chisoni ndi zolepheretsa ndi zachilendo. Kukhala okoma mtima kwa inu nokha kumaneneratu malingaliro ocheperako okhudza wakale. Muzilankhula wekha ngati mmene mungachitire ndi mnzanu wapamtima amene akukupwetekani

4. Pumulani kukhudzana ndi zikumbutso

Zikumbutso zosalekeza za wakale wanu zingakulepheretseni kuchira. M’dziko lamakonoli, nthaŵi zambiri zimenezi zimaphatikizapo malo ochezera a pa Intaneti. Dr. Gary Brown amalangizanso kutsekereza kapena kusokoneza wakale wanu ndi anzawo kwathunthu kwa masiku osachepera 90. Tangoganizani kudzuka osawona zolemba zawo, kapena osadziwa zomwe akuchita. Zidzakupatsani malingaliro anu mwayi wokhazikika popanda zidziwitso zatsopano.

Mofananamo, ganizirani kutsatira lamulo loti musalumikizane , kuchotsa mauthenga akale, kapena kuyika chithunzi chanu m'bokosi. Zinthu zomwe simukuziona zimatha kuiwalika. Kapena, sizimakumbukiridwa nthawi zonse. Mukamalankhulana kwambiri kapena kulembetsa, mumasunga mabalawo otseguka.

Mwina mungafune kuulula kuti “Ndimakukondabe” kapena kufuna kuti mwamuna wanu wakale azikukondani. Koma akatswiri akuchenjeza kuti kuyembekezera yankho kuchokera kwa iwo nthawi zambiri kumalepheretsa kuchira. Dr. Bhonsle anati: “Kusalankhulana kumakupatsani nthawi yolira popanda kukakamira ku chiyembekezo chabodza.

Podzipatsa mtunda wakuthupi komanso wa digito, mumapatsa mtima wanu chipinda chopumira. Ngati muyenera kulankhulana (mwinamwake mumagawana ntchito kapena chiweto), khalani mwachidule komanso ngati bizinesi. Koma kawirikawiri, lingalirani: “Sindikuyesera kuwavulaza, ndikuyesera kudzithandiza ndekha.”

5. Khalani otanganidwa ndikuyesa zatsopano

Pambuyo pa kulekana, nthawi zambiri timataya dzina lathu. Mwina munathera nthawi yochuluka ngati “mnzanu wa mnzake” moti munaiwala zinthu zimene zimakusangalatsani. Iyi ndi nthawi yabwino kuti mupezenso nokha. Khalani otanganidwa ndikufufuza zokonda zatsopano. Cholinga sikukhala "kusokonezedwa" kwamuyaya, koma kumanga moyo womwe umamva kuti ukukwaniritsidwa pawokha. Nazi zina zomwe mungayesere: 

• Yambirani zomwe mumakonda kwambiri kapena yesani zomwe mwakhala mukuzifuna nthawi zonse
• Lowani m'kalasi kapena kujowina gulu lapafupi. Kuchita ndi china chatsopano kumakudziwitsani kwa anthu atsopano komanso zokumana nazo
• Kusintha kwa mawonekedwe kumatha kusintha mawonekedwe anu. Ngakhale ulendo wakumapeto kwa mlungu wopita ku mzinda wapafupi, kapena ulendo wa tsiku limodzi wekha, ungakupangitseni kumva kuti ndinu odziimira paokha komanso ochita chidwi.

Kukhala wotanganidwa sikutanthauza kuti mukuthawa maganizo anu, koma kupereka maganizo amenewo malo osasokonezedwa. Mukakhala ndi nthawi yanu, zowawa zamtima sizidzatha, koma mudzakhala ndi nthawi yomwe malingaliro anu ali kwina. Ganizirani za chochitika chilichonse chatsopano ngati gawo laling'ono lokulitsa chidaliro ndi chizoloŵezi chomwe munali nacho pamene mudali osakwatiwa komanso osangalala.

Kuwerenga Kofanana: Kodi Ndiyenera Kutumizirana Mauthenga ndi Wakale Wanga? Buku Lathunthu Lokuthandizani Kusankha

6. Fufuzani kutseka malinga ndi zomwe mukufuna

Kutseka kumamveka ngati lingaliro losatheka. Mungafune mofunitsitsa mathero abwino. Mwina kukambirana ndi wakale wanu kumvetsa ndendende chifukwa chinatha. Tsoka ilo, kutseka nthawi zambiri sikuchokera kwa iwo. Kudikirira kuti wina afotokoze kapena kutsimikizira zakukhosi kwanu nthawi zambiri kumakupangitsani kukhala wokhazikika.

M'malo mwake, yang'anani pakupanga miyambo yanu yotseka ndi mayankho. Dzifunseni mafunso amene akukusautsani, ndipo yesani kuyankha moona mtima. Mwachitsanzo: “Kodi ubwenzi umenewu unandiphunzitsa chiyani? N’chifukwa chiyani kuthetsa chibwenzi kunali koyenera? Tengani udindo pomwe munalakwitsa, dzikhululukireni nokha ndi iwo, ndipo vomerezani kuti nonse munachita zomwe mumaganiza kuti zinali zabwino panthawiyo. 

Nazi njira zina zomwe mungathandizire kuti mutseke mukatha kutha:

• Lembani kalata yosatumizidwa: Thirani zonse zomwe mukumva mu a kalata kwa ex wanu—chikondi, mkwiyo, mafunso —koma osatumiza. Kulemba kungakhale cathartic. Mutha kuwotcha kapena kung'amba kalatayo pambuyo pake ngati kutsazikana mophiphiritsa
• Lankhulani ndi bwenzi kapena phungu: Nenani malingaliro anu kwa munthu wotetezeka. Nthawi zina kunena mokweza kumathandizira kutseka kwanu
• Mwambo "mwambo wakutha": Anthu ena amaona kuti n’zothandiza kuchita zinthu zophiphiritsa. Mwachitsanzo, ena amang'amba zithunzi, kulemba chikalata ndikuchitaya, kapena kuchita mwambo wawung'ono wa 'kusanzikana' kunyumba. Awa si machiritso amatsenga, koma amatha kuwonetsa ku ubongo wanu kuti mutuwo ukutha.

7. Samalirani thupi ndi malingaliro anu

Muzonsezi, chimodzi mwazinthu zabwino kwambiri zomwe mungachite ndikudzisamalira. Kusweka kungakhale kotopetsa m'thupi ndi m'maganizo. Yesetsani kuyesetsa kuti mukhalebe ndi thanzi labwino. Nazi zina mwazochita zodzisamalira zomwe muyenera kuziyika patsogolo mukatha kutha, makamaka mukamalimbana ndi malingaliro osakhalitsa kwa wakale wanu:

• Yesetsani kukhala ndi nthawi yogona. Kusokonezeka maganizo kungasokoneze kugona, koma kumangofuna nthawi yogona. Malingaliro opumula bwino amakhala olimba
• Ndikosavuta kudumpha kudya kapena kudya kwambiri mukasweka mtima. Khalani ndi cholinga chodya zakudya zoyenera. Kudzilimbitsa nokha kumathandizira kukhazikika kwamalingaliro
• Ngakhale kuchita masewera olimbitsa thupi pang'ono monga kuyenda tsiku ndi tsiku, yoga, kapena kukwera njinga kumatha kukulimbikitsani. Zochita izi zimawonjezera ma endorphins (mankhwala omva bwino) ndikuchepetsa kupsinjika
• Ganizirani kusinkhasinkha, kuchita masewera olimbitsa thupi mozama, kapena kugona pang'ono. Mapulogalamu kapena makanema owongolera atha kukuthandizani kuti mukhale bata. Kulemba malingaliro anu ndikwachire

Kudzisamalira kumatanthauzanso kupewa kubwereranso msanga muubwenzi . Kulowa mu chinthu chatsopano nthawi yomweyo kungawoneke ngati njira yothetsera vutoli, koma akatswiri a zamaganizo amachenjeza kuti nthawi zambiri zimakubwezerani. Kubwereranso kungakubweretsereni mavuto muubwenzi watsopano, zomwe zimapangitsa kuti nonse awiri muvutike. M'malo mwake, lolani kuti chikondi chilichonse chatsopano chichitike pang'onopang'ono, mukachira kwambiri.

Kupeza Kutseka Ndi Kupitilira - Malingaliro 5

Pambuyo pogwira ntchito ndi malangizo omwe ali pamwambawa, mwachiyembekezo mudzapeza kuti mwakonzeka kupitirizabe mokwanira. Kupeza kutseka ndi kusunthira sikusintha nthawi yomweyo, koma mutha kuchitapo kanthu kuti muthandizire izi. Pansipa pali njira zisanu zomwe zingakutsogolereni ku ufulu weniweni wamalingaliro kuchokera kwa wakale wanu.

1. Lembani maganizo anu ndi mmene mukumvera

Kulemba kungakhale kochiritsa kwambiri. Ngati simunayesepo kulemba zolemba m'magawo oyamba, ganizirani tsopano kuti mumvetse bwino. Lembani momasuka zomwe zinachitika: zomwe mudamva, zomwe mudanong'oneza nazo bondo, ndi zomwe mudaphunzira. Nazi malingaliro amomwe mungagwiritsire ntchito mawu kuti mudzichiritse nokha ndikusiya wakale wanu :

• Kalata yosatumizidwa: "Wokondedwa [Dzina], ndimakukondani ndipo ndikumva chisoni zomwe tinali nazo ..." - zidziwitse zonse
• Kuyamikira ndi gripes mndandanda: Mzere umodzi wa nthawi zabwino, wina woipa. Kuwona mbali zonse ziwiri kumakuthandizani kuvomereza chithunzi chonse
• Zolinga zolemba: Lembani zomwe mukufuna tsogolo lanu (maulendo, ntchito, zosangalatsa). Izi zikusintha kuyang'ana kwa "ine ndi iwo" kukhala "ine"

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2. Funsani thandizo la akatswiri kapena gulu ngati kuli kofunikira

Nthawi zina kulankhula ndi anzanu sikokwanira. Ngati ululuwo ukukulirakulira kapena mukukakamira pazinthu zina monga nkhawa, kukhumudwa, kapena kusweka mtima komwe kumakulirakulira tsiku ndi tsiku, ganizirani thandizo la akatswiri. Mlangizi kapena wothandizira angakupatseni njira zothanirana ndi inu. Mukhozanso kujowina pa intaneti kapena gulu lothandizira anthu omwe ali ndi vuto losweka. Kumva nkhani za ena ndikugawana zanu kungakuthandizeni kuti musamakhale nokha. 

• Yang'anani mu mapulogalamu kapena upangiri pa intaneti. Kukhala kosavuta kuyankhula kuchokera kunyumba kungapangitse kuti zikhale zosavuta
• Khalani nawo pamwambo umodzi wapagulu, ngakhale ngati zochitika, zimakupangitsani kukhala pafupi ndi anthu
• Ngati chikhulupiriro ndi chofunikira kwa inu, mutha kutembenukira kwa mtsogoleri wachipembedzo kapena wadera kuti akulimbikitseni

3. Samalirani kukula kwanu ndi tsogolo lanu

Tsegulani tsambali ndikuyamba kulemba mutu watsopano pomwe mumayang'ana kwambiri kupeza tanthauzo latsopano ndikudzimanga nokha. Ganizirani za mbali za moyo wanu zomwe mukufuna kusintha kapena kuzifufuza popeza muli ndi nthawi yochulukirapo:

• Mwina pali maphunziro amene mwakhala mukufuna kuchita, kapena luso lolemba kapena chinenero
• Phunzitsani mpikisano, yambani kuphunzitsa mphamvu, kapena yesani kalasi yovina. Kukwaniritsa zolinga zolimbitsa thupi kungakulitse chidaliro chanu
• Lembani nyimbo, penti, kuphika zakudya zokometsera, dimba—chitani chilichonse chimene chimakupangitsani kumva kuti mwakwanitsa

4. Yesetsani kukhululuka ndi kusiya

Kutseka nthawi zambiri kumabwera ndi chikhululukiro, kwa inu ndi wakale wanu. Kusunga mkwiyo kapena chakukhosi kumakulepheretsani kukumbukira zakale. Izi sizikutanthauza kuti zomwe zinachitika zinali zabwino; zikutanthauza kuti mwasankha kusasenzanso kulemerako. Ndi za kudzimasula nokha.

Anthu ambiri amabwerezanso kutha kwa chibwenzicho, akumalakalaka akanachita zinthu mosiyana. Vomerezani kuti aliyense amalakwitsa. Nenani mwachikumbumtima kuti, “Ndimadzikhululukira chifukwa chosaona kutha kwanga” kapena “Ndimadzikhululukira pa zolakwa zilizonse zimene ndinapanga.” Kudzimvera chisoni kotereku ndi kwamphamvu.

Ndikofunikiranso kukhululukira wakale wanu: Izi ndi zanu, osati iwo. Mungadziuze kuti, “Ndinawakhululukira chifukwa cha zimene anachita pothetsa vutoli. Zimakhala zovuta, koma nthawi zambiri mukakhululuka moona mtima, zimachepetsa mkwiyo womwe umakulepheretsani kuumirira.

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5. Khalani oleza mtima ndi kudzichitira chifundo

Pomaliza, mvetsetsani kuti kusuntha pambuyo pa kusudzulana kumatenga nthawi. Palibe nthawi yokhazikika yoti "muyenera" kumva bwino. Masiku ena mudzadzuka bwino; masiku ena zidzakukhudzani mwadzidzidzi. Ndizabwinobwino. Mungapeze kuti ndizothandiza kukumbukira kuti kuchira sikophweka. Tsiku lina mudzakhala bwino kwambiri, tsiku lotsatira mudzabwerera m'mbuyo. Musadzivutitse ndi izi. M'malo mwake,

• Kondwererani zopambana zazing'ono: Tsiku lililonse mumapita osalumikizana ndi wakale wanu ndikupambana. Mwezi uliwonse mumadzimva ngati nokha ndikupita patsogolo. Taonani kusintha kumeneku
• Lolani chimwemwe kachiwiri: Chinthu chabwino chikachitika (kukwezedwa, kusangalala usiku), dziloleni kuti mukhale osangalala popanda kudziimba mlandu. Muyenera kukhala osangalala
• Khulupirirani kuti muchiritsa: Zitha kutenga nthawi yayitali kuposa momwe mukufunira, koma anthu amachira pakusweka mtima. Maganizo amphamvu adzafewetsa pakapita nthawi. Khulupirirani kuti ndi phunziro lililonse lomwe mwaphunzira, mukukula mwamphamvu

Maganizo Final

Koposa zonse, kumbukirani kuti ngati mwatopa, chithandizo chilipo. Palibe manyazi kufunafuna chitsogozo cha akatswiri. Nthawi zina malangizo a dokotala angakhale opulumutsa moyo. Tsiku lililonse, lonjezani pang'ono: mwina "Lero sindiwatumizira mameseji," kapena "Lero ndikumana ndi mnzanga." Pang'onopang'ono, mawu akuti "Ndimakondabe wokondedwa wanga" adzataya mphamvu zake. Pitirizani kubwereza m'maganizo mwanu: ndinu woyenera kukondedwa, ndipo mudzatha izi.

Mwinanso mungadabwe kuti mungapitirire bwanji mutatha kupatukana mudakali m'chikondi kapena mukudabwa kuti, "Kodi ndidzatha kuthetsa chibwenzi changa?" Mafunso amenewo ndi achibadwa. Gwiritsani ntchito malangizo omwe ali pamwambawa ndipo khulupirirani kuti mayankho abwera nthawi yake. Monga mmene akatswiri amanenera, n’kwachibadwa kukhala ndi maganizo otalikirana ndi wakale wanu. Chofunikira ndikudzisamalira nokha ndikuwongolera mtima wanu patsogolo pang'onopang'ono. Mudzayang’ana m’mbuyo tsiku lina n’kunena kuti, “Ndakwanitsa ndipo ndine wokondwa kuti ndinakwanitsa.”

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