Ubwenzi wapamtima umamupangitsa kufuna kuthawa. Monga makilomita mazana angapo kutali. Amalimbana ndi kulumikizana kwatanthauzo m'mbali zonse za moyo. Ndipo samapanga zambiri za chikondi ndi chiyanjano. Ndindani? Mwamuna wosapezeka m'malingaliro. Ndipo ngati muli m'chikondi ndi iye, ndiye kuti mungavutike kuwona zizindikiro kuti mwamuna yemwe sapezeka kuti akukondani.
Ngati mwamuna wamtunduwu amakhalapo nthawi zonse m'moyo wanu, mumadziwa kuti ndi wosawerengeka. Mwinamwake mukuyesera kufotokoza malingaliro ake kwa inu. Kudula ma petal sikunachite chinyengo komanso BFF yanu sinathe kukutsogolerani. Mutha kusiya kudabwa kuti mutani chifukwa takupulumutsani ndi kiyi kuti tidziwe zizindikiro zomwe mwamuna yemwe sapezeka kuti akukondani.
Mndandanda wosankhidwawu ukuthandizani kumvetsetsa ngati mwamunayo ali ndi chikondi m'maganizo mwake kapena ayi. Chikondi chimatipangitsa kukhala opusa ndipo nayenso satetezedwa. Mwangozi kapena mwadala, wakhala akugwetsa zizindikiro paliponse. Tikungokupatsani magalasi ofunikira kuti muwawone.
Kodi Amuna Osapezeka M'maganizo Angayambe Kukondana?
M'ndandanda wazopezekamo
Aliyense akhoza kugwa m'chikondi, kuphatikizapo mwamuna yemwe alibe maganizo. Kutsika kwawo kwamalingaliro sikumawalepheretsa kukhala ndi chikondi, chikondi ndi chisamaliro. (Momwe amachitira ndi malingaliro amenewo ndi masewera osiyana kwambiri.) Komabe, titha kumvetsetsa komwe kusokonezeka kwanu kumachokera. Kupatula apo, sizovuta kuwerenga zikwangwani zomwe mwamuna yemwe sapezeka kuti akukondani?
Ngakhale izi mwamuna akugwa m'chikondi ndi iwe, kugwedeza maondo ake kudzakhala kuchotsa malingaliro amenewo. Chifukwa chachikulu cha izi ndi chikhulupiriro chake chakuti malingaliro ndi sewero zimayendera limodzi. Poyesera 'kufewetsa' moyo wake, munthu wosapezeka m'malingaliro sangachitepo kanthu pamalingaliro ake. Choncho, si kuti sakugwa m'chikondi - samagwera konse.
Kukhala naye paubwenzi n’kovuta monga momwe kumamvekera. Adzalimbana ndi zoyambira zothandizira, zigawo za chidaliro ndi mikhalidwe ina yambiri yotere. Kukonda mwamuna wosapezeka m'malingaliro kudzafuna kuleza mtima ndi kulimbikira. Koma ife tikupita patsogolo pa tokha. Tiyeni titenge chinthu chimodzi panthawi ndikuyankha funso la ola: Kodi chimapangitsa mwamuna kusapezeka ndi chiyani?
Zomwe Zimapangitsa Kuti Mwamuna Asamapezeke Mwamalingaliro - Malinga ndi Research
Tiyeni tikambirane zimene zimapangitsa amuna kukhala oletsa maganizo. Malinga ndi a phunziro moyenerera mutu wakuti 'Anthu amati amuna salankhula, chabwino ndicho bullsh*t', amuna adanena kuti chifukwa cha kusalidwa kozungulira thanzi laubongo la abambo, "samakhala omasuka nthawi zonse kugawana kapena kukambirana malingaliro awo ndi malingaliro awo ndi ena. malingaliro onga ngati chisoni kapena kulira amachepetsa kaimidwe ka amuna pamene kulamulira maganizo kapena kusonyeza malingaliro mwaukali kungawongolere mkhalidwe waumuna.” Izi zimatsogolera ku a kuopa ubwenzi.
Kufufuzako kunanenanso kuti: “Mwamuna wina anafotokoza mmene kutsegulira za thanzi la maganizo kaŵirikaŵiri kumaonedwa kukhala chizindikiro cha kufooka ndi kunyozedwa ndi anzanga.” Iye anati: “Ndinauza mnzanga wina kuti ndikubwera [kugulu la amuna] ndipo iye anaseka ndipo sindinalankhule naye kuyambira pamenepo.
“Mwamuna wina, monga mbali ya phunzirolo, anafotokoza mmene ankakhulupirira kuti kukambitsirana za thanzi la maganizo kungabweretse mavuto aakulu.” Kodi tsopano mukuwona zomwe zimachitika mukanyalanyaza thanzi lamalingaliro lamunthu yemwe salipo? Ngati mukufuna thandizo kuchokera kwa katswiri wazamisala kuti muthane ndi izi, gulu la akatswiri a Bonobology ndi gawo chabe dinani kutali. Mukuyenera kulandira chithandizo chopanda tsankho.
Malinga ndi kafukufukuyu, "Zochitika zamkati zamkati zaumoyo wamalingaliro zidapangitsa kuti zikhale zovuta kwa amuna kuganiza ndi kufotokoza zomwe akumva komanso momwe aliri bwino." Kwa ena, zinali zovuta kwambiri kudziwa momwe angachitire, pamene mikhalidwe m'miyoyo yawo monga kusamuka, kusudzulana, kupsinjika kwa ntchito, ndi kuchepa kwa malo ochezera a pa Intaneti kumamangidwa ndikusonkhanitsidwa ngati mavuto osathetsedwa kwa amuna kapena ntchito zawo ... kuzindikira maganizo kumawachititsa kunyalanyaza thanzi lawo la maganizo.”
Chifukwa chake abambo sapeza njira zotetezeka, mwina kupatula bwenzi lawo lapamtima lachikazi/mnzawo/mnzawo wapamtima wamwamuna, pomwe malingaliro awo amatengedwa mozama ndikukambirana popanda kuweruza. Iwo amakhala otsekeredwa mu mkombero woipa wa amuna oyamwa. Ichi ndichifukwa chake kukhala ndi chibwenzi ndi mwamuna wosapezeka m'malingaliro kumakhala kovuta. Ngakhale muubwenzi, mwamuna wosapezeka m'malingaliro amafuna kukhala paubwenzi ndi omwe samamukakamiza kuti akhale pachibwenzi chakuya ndipo amatha kukhala ndi maubwenzi ongoyang'ana popanda kuyembekezera kwachikondi ndi kudalirana.
Kupatula kukhazikika kwa amuna kapena akazi, kusalidwa mozungulira momwe akumvera, komanso zovuta zamaganizidwe, zinthu zina zomwe zingayambitse kuletsa kwamalingaliro mwa amuna ndi izi:
- Kuyankha kwa zoopsa chifukwa cha zochitika zovuta za moyo
- Kusakhulupirira kotheratu kwa mnzawo
- Kusowa njira yothandizira / chisamaliro
- Kusowa kotulutsa / nsanja / sing'anga yoyenera kutengera malingaliro
- Kuopa kudzipereka
- Kugonana ngati cholinga chokhacho
- Kusadzizindikira
- Kupanda kudzidalira mwa mwamuna amamupangitsanso kutsekeka m'maganizo
Ngati mumasamala za munthu ngati uyu - kaya ndi munthu wopanda chidwi yemwe akufuna kukhala paubwenzi ndi inu kapena muli pachibwenzi ndi munthu yemwe sapezeka - ndikofunikira kuti mudziwe zomwe zimamupangitsa kukhala yemwe ali. Ngati mumakondana naye, kumbukirani kuti simungathe (ndipo simuyenera) kumusintha usiku wonse. Izi zidzafuna njira yapang'onopang'ono komanso yokhazikika. Ndiye kodi mwakonzeka kuphunzira momwe mungapezere mwamuna yemwe sapezeka kuti akuthamangitseni ndikukukondani? (Inde, ndi chipiriro, ndizotheka!)
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Malangizo Opangitsa Kuti Mwamuna Osapezeka M'malingaliro Ayambe Kukukondani
Rhonda, yemwe ali ndi zaka 25, wojambula zithunzi za claymation, anati: “Ndili pachibwenzi ndi mnyamata wabwino kwambiri ameneyu koma sandiululira za mmene akumvera mumtima mwanga. amuna osapezeka amakusowa ukakhala kulibe?" Iye akuusa moyo, “Ndikanakonda kutenga 'Ndakusowa' malemba kuchokera kwa iye tsiku lina.”
Ndizovuta kuwona zizindikiro kuti mwamuna yemwe sapezeka kuti akukondani. Ndipo ngakhale kuti mwana wa Rhonda amamukonda, maubwenzi amafunika kutsimikiziridwa nthawi ndi nthawi. Zikuwoneka ngati iye ndipo mutha kugwiritsa ntchito maupangiri amomwe mungapangire mwamuna yemwe sapezeka kuti akuthamangitseni. Tiyeni tichite izi.
- Dziwani zomutumizira mameseji: Tiyeni tiwone zomwe tingatumizire mwamuna yemwe sapezeka m'malingaliro kuti ayambe kuyika maziko okhulupirira ndi chikondi, sichoncho? Nazi zitsanzo:
- Hei, ndakusowani. Ndikukhulupirira kuti tidzakhala limodzi posachedwa. Ndimakonda kampani yanu
- Ndikufuna kuti mudziwe kuti ndine malo otetezeka kuti mubwere kudzayankhulana, chilichonse. Ubwino wanu ndi wofunika kwa ine
- Ndili ndi tsiku lovuta kwambiri, ndipo ndi inu nokha amene ndimafuna kuti ndilankhule kapena kukumana naye. Kukhalapo kwanu ndi kotonthoza kwambiri
- Ndakuwonani mumakonda kujambula. Kodi mukufuna kudzakhala nane pamisonkhano wamba pomwe tonse timangokhala ndikujambula? (Izi ndi kuti afotokoze zakukhosi kwake m'njira yomwe amakonda)
- Musanyalanyaze iye: Mukanyalanyaza mwamuna yemwe sapezekapo, akhoza kukhumudwa koma sanganene zomwezo. Zingolimbitsa chikhulupiriro chake kuti kukuwonetsani zakukhosi kwake sikuli bwino. Chifukwa chake simukufuna kuchita izi. Nazi zomwe mnyamata amaganiza ukamunyalanyaza
- Musayese kuti achite nsanje mwa iye: Ngati mukuyesera kuti mutsegule munthu uyu pophunzira momwe mungapangire munthu wosapezekapo kukhala wansanje, ndiye kuti ndibwino kuti mubisale dongosololi pakhomo. Ngati mungamuchitire nsanje, mungangomutsekereza n’kumupangitsa kuti ayambenso kutero
- Osadzudzula kusowa kwake kwamalingaliro: Iye sanabise konse gawo ili la iye. Mumadziwa kuti izi zidzakhala zovuta. Chifukwa chake simungamuvutitse kuti akulembereni nyimbo zachikondi. Perekani nthawi ino. Mukamulandira mwachikondi, zingamuthandize kuti adzivomere
- Khalani malo otetezeka ndikuchotsa umuna wapoizoni: Ngati ndinu wokhwima m'malingaliro komanso womasuka, zimamusangalatsa kuti atsatire zomwezo. Khalani munthu yemwe amakhulupirira kuti abambo akuyenera kukhala ndi mwayi wofikira pamalingaliro awo onse popanda kuweruza. Gawani naye zomwe zili pamasamba ochezera a pa Intaneti omwe amakhudza umuna wathanzi. Khalani olimbikitsa ndi kutsimikizira kwa anyamata ndi amuna omwe ali pafupi naye. Mukhalepo ndi iye pamene akukufunani kuti adziwe kuti ndi bwino kudalira ena. Ngati akukhulupirira kuti ndiwe malo otetezeka, posachedwapa muwona zizindikiro zoti mwamuna yemwe sapezeka kuti akukondani
- Lolani kuti amveke: Gwirani danga kwa iye. Akatsegula, musayese kufufuza kapena kukonza zokambirana zake. Musayese kumufunsa mafunso. Tsimikizirani komwe akuchokera. Ino si nthawi yomutsutsa kapena kukayikira maganizo ake
- Muthokozeni: Muthokozeni nthawi iliyonse akagawana nanu chinthu chovuta kwambiri. Muuzeni mmene zimakhalira kwa inu kuti amakukhulupirirani ndi mmene akumvera mumtima mwake
- Onetsani chikondi chanu mokwanira: Osagwira ntchito. Mulungu amadziwa 'iye' amatero. Choncho mukufunikira bwenzi limodzi muubwenzi yemwe angakhale chitsanzo chabwino cha chiyanjano chachikondi
- Konzani ngati chikhulupiriro chasweka: Simungathe kuwonanso zizindikiro zilizonse kuti mwamuna yemwe sakukondani amakukondani chifukwa mwina mwamusokoneza ndipo wamuvuta. Mufunseni zimene mungachite kuti ayambenso kukukhulupirirani, ndipo tsatirani malangizowo
- Mupangireni chipatala: Wothandizira ndi lingaliro labwino, kaya mnyamata wanu wakhala akuvutika ndi kufotokoza maganizo, kapena ngati kuchoka kwake kwakhala chifukwa cha zoopsa zaposachedwapa. Lankhulani za ubwino wa uphungu naye popanda kumukakamiza
- Mulimbikitseni kuti adzipangire yekha malo otetezeka: Kodi amakonda kulemba? Werengani? Kupaka? Onetsetsani kuti mumalimbikitsa izi. Izi ndi zotulutsa zazikulu zamalingaliro
- Tsimikizirani mdima / kusatetezeka kwake: Ngati izi ndizinthu zomwe sangathe kuthana nazo ndipo samamukonda, muwonetseni pang'onopang'ono kuti mumamukonda NDI zovuta zonse komanso zolemetsa.
- Yamikirani kuwala kwake / mphamvu zake: Muuzeni zimene zimakuchititsani kumva kuti mumamulemekeza, kumukonda, kapena kumukonda. Ali ndi mwayi wambiri wokuuzani momwe amakumverani zikayamba kuchokera kwa inu poyamba
- Khalani apamtima: Akhoza kuvutika mu dipatimenti yokhudzana ndi maganizo, koma simukutero, chabwino? Musonyezeni iye momwe izo zimachitikira. Gawani zofooka zanu, mumpatireni, mumpsompsone masaya ake, mugwireni manja, muuzeni kuti mumamukonda. Koma musayembekezere kubweza zochuluka, osati poyamba
Kuwerenga Kofanana: Kuwona Kwaukatswiri - Kodi Ubwenzi Wamwamuna Ndi Chiyani
Ngati izi zigwira ntchito, posachedwa mudzamuwona akukondani, kwathunthu komanso poyera. Kumbukirani pamene Rhonda anafunsa kuti, “Kodi amuna opanda maganizo amakusowani?” Mwamuna wanu akakupatsani mtima wake ndi chikhulupiriro, simudzasowa kudabwa za izi. Adzakuuzani yekha.
Chotsatira ndikuyankha izi: Kodi ndi zizindikiro ziti zomwe mwamuna yemwe sapezeka kuti akukondani? Werengani kuti mudziwe ntchito zamkati za mtima ndi malingaliro ake. Mudzadziwa ngati mumawerenga zinthu, kapena ngati ali mwa inu zowona.
Zizindikiro 15 Zoti Munthu Osapezeka M'malingaliro Ali M'chikondi
"Kodi munayamba mwakondanapo? Zowopsya eti? Zimakupangitsani kukhala osatetezeka kwambiri. Zimatsegula chifuwa chanu ndikutsegula mtima wanu ndipo zikutanthauza kuti wina akhoza kulowa mkati mwanu ndikusokoneza." Mawu awa a Neil Gaiman akuwoneka kuti atuluka m'bukhu laulamuliro lamunthu lomwe silinapezeke. Umu ndi momwe amaonera chikondi - masewero ambiri, chisoni ndi kusweka mtima kosapeweka.
Kumbukirani malingaliro ake pamene mukulowa mu zizindikiro pansipa. Mudzamvetsetsa chifukwa chake ali ochuluka kuchokera komwe akubwera. Nayi (drumroll, chonde) zizindikiro zosonyeza kuti mwamuna yemwe sakukhudzidwa amakukondani.
1. Pali okonzeka kusintha kuti akhale abwino
Ichi ndiye chizindikiro chabwino kwambiri chomwe mungawone. Kusapezeka kwamalingaliro nthawi zambiri kumatsagana ndi umbuli; mwamunayo sadziwa zotchinga zake. Koma ngati wayamba kukukondani, padzakhala kudzidziwitsa komwe kungamutsogolere kusintha. Mudzamuwona akuyesetsa kusintha njira zake. Munthu wosapezeka m'malingaliro sangakhale akukana kapena kudziteteza. Ndipo izi ndi a Khalidwe limene limasiyanitsa chikondi chopanda dyera ndi chikondi chodzikonda.
2. Ndiwokonzeka kugawana nawo moyo wake
Pano pali gawo lomwe nthawi zambiri sachita bwino. Izi zili choncho chifukwa mwamuna yemwe alibe maganizo sangaone cholinga chopezera ena malo m'moyo wake. Koma ndinu osiyana… Amafuna kuti muwone mbali yake yachinsinsi pamodzi ndi zakale. Mwinamwake mudzadziwa zambiri za iye kuposa anthu ambiri - mfundo zochepa, zomwe amakonda ndi zomwe sakonda, zikumbukiro zabwino, nkhani zaubwana, ndi zina zotero. Osagogomezera izi ngati zosafunikira. Ndi imodzi mwa nkhani zazikulu kwambiri za mwamuna yemwe sapezeka m'chikondi.
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3. Kudzipereka kuli pamakhadi - Zizindikiro kuti mwamuna yemwe sapezeka m'malingaliro akukondani
Mungakhale otsimikiza za mmene amamvera pakakhala zizindikiro za kudzipereka. Ndipo ichi sichiyenera kukhala chochitika chachikulu monga kusamukira pamodzi kapena kukwatira; ali wotsimikiza za inu ngati agwiritsa ntchito mawu monga 'ife' ndi 'ife.' Maganizo a nkhandwe okhawo akuchoka chifukwa amakuwonani m'tsogolo mwake. Mwamuna wosapezeka m'malingaliro nthawi zambiri amapewa zilembo koma amagwirira ntchito yake phobia yodzipereka za ubale womwe mumagawana.
4. Sali bwino kukhala pachiwopsezo
Sindingathe kutsindika mokwanira kufunika kwa izi. Pamafunika kulimba mtima ndi chikondi kuti akumasulireni. Kulira, kusonyeza kupsinjika maganizo, kapena kuvomereza kuti ali ndi chisoni, ndi chinthu chachikulu kwa iye. Ngati muli ndi mwayi wowona mbali iyi ya umunthu wake, amakhala womasuka kuti achotse chithunzi chamunthu wamphamvu ndi inu. Mwamuna wosapezeka m'chikondi adzakupangitsani kukhala malo ake otetezeka.
5. Sizokhudza kugonana kokha
Monga ndanenera kale, mwina ali ndi mbiri yopewa zilembo kapena 'kumangidwa.' Mgwirizano wopanda zingwe kapena abwenzi-ndi-zopindula akhala zosankha zake mpaka pano. Koma ngati mwabwera kuti mukhale ndi malo mu mtima mwake, ubale wanu uli ndi NJIRA yochulukirapo kuposa kugonana. Amafuna kukumana nanu ndikuchita zinthu chifukwa amakukondani, osati chifukwa chofuna kuchitapo kanthu. Ichi ndi chimodzi mwazizindikiro zomveka bwino kuti mwamuna yemwe sapezeka m'malingaliro amakukondani.
6. Iye akukwaniritsa malonjezo ake
Ngati adanena kuti apita ku chakudya chamadzulo ndi anzanu, mungadalire kuti adziwonetsera mphindi zisanu mofulumira. Padzakhala kugwirizana m’mawu ake ndi m’zochita zake. Stephen Richards ananena mwanzeru, “Malonjezo ndi amphamvu monga munthu amene amawapereka…” Ndipo chikondi pa inu chikupanga munthu wabwinoko mwa iye. Apita masiku akuuluza munthu ndi malonjezo osasinthika.
7. Pali kusasinthasintha mu khalidwe lake
Kodi chimodzi mwazizindikiro zabwino kwambiri zosonyeza kuti mwamuna yemwe sakukondani ndi chiyani? Iye samawomba kutentha ndi kuzizira. Mofanana ndi munthu aliyense wokhwima maganizo ndi wochita bwino, iye sasintha khalidwe lake ndi inu. Sipadzakhala aliyense magawo obwereza-ochokanso kapena zochitika zamatsenga. Zonsezi zimachokera ku ulemu; adzaona kuti nthawi ndi mphamvu zanu n’zofunika kwambiri. Zofuna zake ndi zokhumba zake sizidzalamulira kugwira ntchito kwa ubalewu.
8. Sachita manyazi ndi ubwenzi wapamtima
Bwererani ndi kuwerenga chiganizo choyamba cha chidutswa ichi. Ngati mwamuna wosapezeka m'malingaliro akupereka chiyamikiro ndi zotsimikizira, amakambirana mwakuya komanso amamanga chikhulupiriro mu ubale, wagwa mutu kwa inu. Inde, ubwenzi wapamtima sungathe kubwera mwachibadwa kwa iye, koma sangathamangire atangoona koyamba. Mpatseni ulemu chifukwa choyesera - si njira yosavuta kuyendamo. Kodi izi sizizindikiro zosonyeza kuti mwamuna yemwe sakukondani amakukondani kwambiri?
9. Kodi ndi zizindikiro ziti zomwe mwamuna yemwe ali pachibwenzi akugwa m'chikondi ndi chiyani? Amayamikira mmene mumaonera zinthu
Mpaka pano, iye watsogolera moyo wake m'njira yodzidalira kwambiri. Maonedwe a anthu ena alibe kanthu kwenikweni kwa iye. Chotero pamene munamuuza kuti ulaliki wake ukhoza kusintha pang’ono isanafike kwa wofuna chithandizo, iye angakhale anadabwitsidwa, koma anamvetsera. Chifukwa chiyani malingaliro anu adamulemetsa chonchi? Zosavuta - chifukwa amakukondani. Iye amaganizira kaonedwe kanu musanasankhe zochita. Zokoma kwambiri, ndikunena.
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10. Iye amayankha pa zochita zake
Izi ndizomwe zili pamwamba pazizindikiro zosonyeza kuti palibe munthu amene ali m'chikondi. Kukhala ndi zolakwa zake ndiko kukula kwakukulu mu umunthu wake. Kufunitsitsa kwake kutenga udindo kumasonyeza masomphenya a nthawi yaitali. Amafuna kukhala bwenzi labwino kwa inu mwa kukonza zolakwa zake. Gawo loyamba pa izi ndikuvomereza. Iye sangalowerere mu kuyatsa gasi kapena kunyengerera mwachikondi chifukwa chonena zolakwa zake.
11. Mwakumana ndi anthu ocheza nawo
Kudziwitsa okondedwa anu kwa makolo anu nthawi zonse ndi sitepe yabwino. Ngati mwakumana ndi makolo ake kapena abwenzi, amafuna kuti mukhale nawo kwa nthawi yayitali. Munthu wosapezeka m'maganizo sakhala ndi phindu lalikulu pofotokozera theka lake labwino pagulu lake. Ngati wachita zimenezi ndi inu, uwu ndi ubwenzi wamba kwa iye. Kukhalapo kwanu kwatsimikizira pa iye kufunika kochita chidwi ndi anthu.
12. Amafuna kudziwa zambiri za inu
Osati chifukwa choti akuyenera kutero - ali ndi chidwi chenicheni ndi moyo wanu. Chimodzi mwa zizindikiro zosaoneka bwino kwambiri zakuti mwamuna yemwe sapezeka m'malingaliro amakukondani ndikuti amakukondani kukulitsa ubalewo pomvetsera bwino. Sadzakudulani kapena kusokonezedwa mosavuta - mudzamupatsa chidwi chilichonse mukamalankhula nonse. Mpata uliwonse wopeza zomwe mumakonda umalandiridwa ndi iye.
13. Matanthauzo ake akusintha - Mwamuna wosapezeka m'maganizo mwachikondi
Kodi mwawona kusintha kwa njira yake pa maubwenzi? Kodi poyamba sanawaganizire molakwika? Mawu ngati 'sewero losafunikira' kapena 'kukhala malamulo osakwatiwa' anali okhazikika. Koma matanthauzo ake asintha ngati akugwerani. Panopa amaona kuti kukhala pachibwenzi n’kosangalatsa, ndipo ukwati kapena pangano sizim’chititsa mantha. Wayamba kulemekeza chikondi chonse.
Kuwerenga Kofanana: Zizindikiro 5 Zosamvetseka Kuti Amakukondani
14. Mwakhala chinthu chofunika kwambiri
Elisabeth Hasselbeck anati: “Palibe munthu amene amakhala ndi moyo wokhazikika. Ndipo tsopano, wakuikani patsogolo m’moyo wake. Munthu wosapezeka m'malingaliro nthawi zambiri amawonetsa zizindikiro za chibwenzi chodzikonda, koma kukhala m’chikondi kumampangitsa kukhala wosadzikonda. Adzanyengerera ndikukusinthirani, ngakhale atachoka pamalo ake abwino. Nthawi yake idzakhala yanu ndipo zinthu zina zidzatengera kumbuyo.
15. Pali chithandizo chochuluka muubwenzi
Kodi ndi zizindikiro ziti zomwe mwamuna wosapezeka akugwa m'chikondi, mukufunsa? Adzathandizira zosankha zanu ngakhale sizikugwirizana ndi masomphenya ake. Malingana ngati akukupangitsani kukhala osangalala, iye adzakhazikitsa zosankha zanu. Padzakhala chifundo kuchokera kumapeto kwake pamene ayamba kuika moyo wanu patsogolo. Kusapezeka kwake kwamalingaliro sikungamulepheretse kukufunirani zabwino.
Zolozera Mfungulo
- Zimakhala zovuta kukhala pachibwenzi ndi mwamuna yemwe sangamusangalatse, koma choyamba tiyenera kumvetsetsa zomwe zimapangitsa amuna kukhala oletsa chikhalidwe chathu.
- Pali kusalidwa pakati pa amuna omwe amafotokoza zakukhosi kwawo ndipo izi zimakhudzanso chikondi chawo
- Mukamvetsetsa izi, muyenera kukhala woleza mtima ndi iye. Adzakulitsa chikhulupiriro mwa inu ndikukuonani ngati malo ake otetezeka pamene mukuyamba kukhala pachiwopsezo ndi iye ndikumulola kuti achite zomwezo
- Muvomereni iye m’mithunzi yake yonse, muloleni alankhule, khalani naye paubwenzi, musanyalanyaze iye kapena kumuchitira nsanje, ndipo khalani owona mtima kwa iye kotero kuti athe kusonkhezeredwa kuwonekeranso poyera.
- Akayamba kukukondani, amatsegula, kukhala pachiwopsezo, kukuyamikirani, kusonyeza kudzipereka, kutsatira malonjezo ake, ndi kukhala wogwirizana ndi inu.
Ndi voila! Mukuganiza chiyani pazizindikiro izi kuti mwamuna yemwe sakukondani amakukondani? Ndikukhulupirira akupatsani kumveka komwe mumafuna. Tsopano muyenera kusankha zochita - kodi mungadikire kuti akufunseni pamayendedwe akeake kapena mungamupusitse pang'ono kapena mwina mungoyamba nokha? Ndidziwitseni momwe zimakhalira mu gawo la ndemanga pansipa. Zokhumba zanga zabwino kwambiri komanso chikondi chochuluka.
Ibibazo
Pali masukulu awiri amalingaliro pano. Limodzi likusonyeza kuti mwamuna wosapezeka m'malingaliro amaphonya ntchito yomwe mumakwaniritsa m'moyo wake, osati inuyo panokha. Wachiwiri akunena kuti si wodzikonda - amakusowani moona mtima. Pali chowonadi ku mayankho onsewa.
'Win' ikuwoneka ngati mawu olakwika. Simungasinthe munthu usiku umodzi. Pali zambiri zomwe sizinathetsedwe zikafika pakusapezeka kwamalingaliro. Njira yabwino kwambiri ndiyo kukhala woleza mtima ndi wachifundo pamene mwamuna akutenga ulendo wake wakukula. Kukonda mwamuna yemwe sapezekako sikophweka.
Inde. Kudzigwira ntchito nthawi zonse kumapindulitsa. Koma kusinthaku kumachitika pamene munthu wosapezeka m'malingaliro amazindikira kuti njira yake yogwirira ntchito si yabwino. Ngati akudziwa komanso akufuna kugwira ntchitoyo, akhoza kusintha maganizo. Werengani pazizindikiro zomwe mwamuna wopanda chidwi akuyamba kukondana kuti amvetsetse momwe kusinthaku kungachitike.
Ngati mumamukonda, mungafune kuti musamavutike ndipo musamukakamize kuti achite kwa inu masabata angapo oyambirira kapena miyezi ingapo ya chibwenzi. Mawu omasuka ndi odekha amenewo ayenera kusonyeza pokambirana naye. Osamulembera mameseji kawiri, mwachitsanzo. Ngati mumulola danga kuti akonze siteji iliyonse yaubwenzi, pali mwayi woti mudzawona zizindikiro kuti mwamuna yemwe sangapezeke akukondani.
Kuchita ndi Chibwenzi Chosadzidalira? Nawa Malangizo 15 Othana Ndi Mavuto
Zopereka zanu sizikupanga zachifundo Mphatso. Zilola kuti Bonobology ipitilize kukubweretserani zidziwitso zatsopano komanso zaposachedwa pakufuna kwathu kuthandiza aliyense padziko lapansi kuphunzira momwe angachitire chilichonse.
