He aha ahau ka pana atu ai i te aroha? He pātai tēnei e pātaihia ana e te tini o te tangata ki a rātou anō ina kore ō rātou oranga aroha e haere pērā i tā rātou e hiahia ana. Ina aroha ana, ka nui te kaha, ka tae ki tōna taumata te hoatu me te tango, ā, ka kitea te kanapa o te aroha i ngā wāhi katoa.
I a tātou e pārekareka ana ki te harikoa me te rā o te aroha, te ngākau aroha me te ngākau māhaki, kāore tātou e mōhio me whakapau kaha te tāne me te wahine kia ora tonu ai. Ko ngā āhuatanga tino kino o te hononga e pirau ana ko te tawhiti, te whanoke, te noho mārire, te whakama i te aroaro o te marea me te whanonga whakahē. Ki te mea kei a koe te āhua o te pana atu i tētahi i roto i tētahi whanaungatanga, tera pea kei te whakangaro koe i tō whanaungatanga . Me pēhea koe e mōhio ai kei a koe te hinengaro pana atu? Pānuihia tonu.
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15 Ngā Huarahi e Panaia Ana e Tātou te Aroha me te Kore Whakaaroaro
Ripanga o Ihirangi
Me whakaaro te whanaungatanga ki tētahi mahi toi e ahu whakamua ana, me peita, me whakairo, me pani, me whakapau kaha kia ātaahua ai. Ki te kore koe e whakapau kaha ki te mea kia motuhake tō hoa, ā, ka mutu, ka mahi koe i ngā mea e whara ai rātou, e kore ai rānei e hiahiatia, ko te aroha ka peia atu e koe.
Ahakoa tō aroha nui ki tō hoa, nā ō whanonga me tō kore whakapau kaha, kei te pana atu pea koe i te aroha ahakoa kei roto i tō ngākau e hiahia ana koe kia noho tonu. Me pēhea koe e tau ai ki tētahi āhuatanga uaua, ina kei a koe te aroha e hiahiatia ana e koe, engari kei te pana atu koe i te aroha? Anei ngā huarahi 15 e taea ai e koe te mahi i tēnei mea me te kore mōhio.
1. Te kore aro ki āna kupu, ki āna waea, ki te whakaroa rānei i tana whakautu
He āhua noa iho tēnei hapa, ā, kāore tātou e mōhio ana ka puta he pakaru nui i roto i tētahi whanaungatanga. He kino hoki te urupare a ngā tamariki me ngā mōkai ki tēnei āhuatanga e kīia nei ko te 'tawhiti'.
Kei te ngana te tāne ki te kōrero ki a koe, kei te kukume rānei te tamaiti i tō kākahu, kei te mirimiri rānei tō ngeru i ō waewae, engari kāore koe i whakautu mai, kei te whakaari rānei kāore koe i rongo. Ki te mea he hapa kuware ki a koe, kia tūpato kei te pana atu koe i ō whanaunga. Ki te kore koe e whakautu mai ki tētahi karere kuputuhi , ki te kore rānei e waea mai anō, ka waiho he pānga nui ki te tangata.
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2. Te whakaatu i te whakaute, te harikoa me te māhana ki ētahi atu
He maha ngā tāne me ngā wāhine e whai wāhi ana ki tēnei whanonga iti, tamariki hoki, inā koa i muri i te whawhai . Ki te pakeke tō hoa rangatira, ka mōhio ia kāore he kino o ā kōrua mahi.
Kāore pea koe e mōhio ana āhea ka tae ki te wā tino rerekē mēnā ka haere tonu koe ki te whakapai i ētahi atu me te kore e aro ki a rātou. He tino morearea pea mēnā kāore koe e aro, ka kino haere pea.
3. Te noho hei tangata whakatoi
He kino rawa te mahi a te amuamu ki te hoa rangatira, ki te mātua rānei. Ki te kore koe e whakatika wawe i ō ara, ka ngaro haere ō hoa aroha ina puta he amuamu. Ehara i te mea ka panaia te aroha e te amuamu tonu, engari ka arahi atu hoki ki te pakaru o te whanaungatanga.
He mea pai kia mahara koe ki te whakarerekē i tō rautaki mēnā kāore te iwi e whakarongo mai ki a koe. Ko te hapa tata mate ko te amuamu i mua i te aroaro o ētahi atu tāngata; ka panaia te aroha me te whakaute, mai i tō hoa aroha me te hunga o waho.
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4. Te whanonga whanoke, te whanonga whakahē rānei i te aroaro o ētahi atu
Ko te whakahe he tikanga kino noa iho e whanakehia ana e ētahi tāngata. Ahakoa he tāne koe, he wahine rānei, me mahara ki te kī i tētahi kōrero kino kotahi noa iho, ā, ki ngā tamariki, me kī noa mēnā e toru ngā mea pai hei kōrero māu ki a rātou.
Ko te whakahe i mua i te aroaro o ētahi atu, he rite ki te pere mate o tētahi whanaungatanga. Ko ngā hoa e whakapono ana ki te whakamahi i te hauhautanga, e tukino ana rānei i ō rātou hoa i roto i te kare ā-roto, ka uru ki te whakahe nanakia. Mā te whakahe kore aroha ka panaia e koe te aroha.
5. Te whakakore i te whanaungatanga piripono i runga i ngā whakaaro ngoikore
He maha ngā wāhine e whiriwhiri ana i te rautaki "He mamae te upoko o taku mahunga" hei karo i te whanaungatanga piripono . Ahakoa he tino tika ina pono, ka panaia e koe te aroha, ā, i te mutunga ka hoha ia ki ō tauira karo.
Kimihia he ara waenga hei mārama ki ana hiahia moepuku , ā, ki te mea he awhi, he takaro noa iho tō hiahia, me kōrero kōrua. Kaua e whakamahia te moepuku hei huarahi rapu utu mō tō hoa. Kaua e tangohia te aroha o tō hoa aroha, ka ngaro atu ia mēnā ka waiho hei tikanga māu te mamae o te upoko.
6. Kāore e tino whai wāhi atu ahakoa kei te mahi koe
Ki te tukua koe e te moepuku, engari mātakitaki i te pouaka whakaata i a ia e aroha ana ki a koe, e mahi noa rānei i ngā mahi noa, me te whakaatu kāore koe i te tino hiahia, ā, nā te mea i tono ia, ka rongo ia kua whakamahia ia, kāore hoki i te arohaina e tō moepuku aroha.
Pērā anō hoki mēnā ko te tāne te tangata e mangere ana , e whakamahi ana rānei i tana hoa. Ko te kore aro ki te ngākau māhaki, ki te orgasm, ki te harikoa rānei o te hoa rangatira, he tūāpapa tēnei ki tētahi aituā e tata mai ana.
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7. He tino takitahi rawa koe
Ehara te āputa i te mea whakamataku i roto i te whanaungatanga, engari ki te whānui rawa te āputa, ka puta he raruraru. Tērā pea kei te pana atu koe i te aroha mā te tino takitahi.
Tērā pea kei te aro nui rawa koe ki ō ake mea e pai ana ki a koe, me te kōrero nui mō te hiahia mō te wāhi. Nā, ko koe te tangata hiahia ki te whanaungatanga, me te pana atu i te aroha?
8. Ka panaia e koe te aroha mā te kore whakatau
Ko te kore whakatau he take e kore ai e taea e te tini te hanga whanaungatanga hauora . Nō reira, he maha ngā wāhine e tuku tohu rerekē ana ki ngā tāne, engari ki te mea kei te tumanako koe kia mārama tō hoa ki tāu e hiahia ana me te kore koe e kōrero, he nui rawa ō tumanako.
Nō reira, ko koe te momo tangata kāore e taea te whakatau i tetahi mea, ā, i tua atu i tēnā, e hiahia ana koe kia matatau tō hoa ki te pānui i ō whakaaro. I roto i tēnei āhuatanga, ka oma atu te aroha.
9. E mataku ana koe i te whakapau kaha
Kei te oma tonu koe i te aroha. E aroha ana koe ki ngā mea katoa e pā ana ki te tangata e piri tahi ana koe, ā, kua neke atu koe ki te piri tahi motuhake engari ina tae mai te pātai mō te whakapau kaha ka hoki whakamuri koe.
Ki te mea he tangata koe e mataku ana ki te whakapau kaha, kei te pana atu koe i te aroha, kei te whara hoki i te tangata. Tērā pea kei te mātao koe ina kaha rawa te hononga, ā, ka pana tonu atu koe i te aroha.
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10. He nui rawa tō hae
He pai te nui o te hae mō te whanaungatanga, engari ki te nui rawa te hae o te hoa , he huarahi tino pai tēnā hei peia atu i te aroha.
Engari tera pea ka whakamahia te hae hei painga mōu, hei pupuri hoki i te aroha. He maha ngā tāngata ka hē mā te tuku i te hae kia kaha ake i a rātou.
11. Kei te hiahia tonu koe ki te mana whakahaere
Ka pakaru te whanaungatanga i te hiahia o te tangata ki te whakahaere, engari kāore e taea te whakakore i te meka kei roto i a tātou katoa te mana whakahaere. Ko te hunga e taea te whakahaere i ō rātou hiahia whakahaere ka tupu pai i roto i te whanaungatanga, ko te hunga kāore e taea te pana atu i te aroha.
Ka kino te tangata ki te mana whakahaere, ā, ki te nui rawa te mana whakahaere, ka huri hei whanaungatanga tukino. Nō reira, ko te nuinga o te tangata e hiahia ana kia mawhiti atu i te aroha whakahaere i mua i tērā.
12. Kāore koe i te mōhio me pēhea te whakatau i te pakanga
Kāore e taea te whakahaere i tō riri, ā, ka uru koe ki ngā pakanga kino, ki te pā mai rānei he pakanga, ka pōuri koe mō ngā rā, ā, ka hūmārire noa iho.
Kāore koe e mōhio me pēhea te whakatau i te pakanga , me te mutu te noho puku mōna. He rite te pakanga ki te poma e pakū ana, e noho tonu ana koe i runga. Ko tāu mahi he pana atu i te hinengaro o te tangata.
13. Kāore koe e pupuri i te akuaku
Kāore koe e aro nui ki te akuaku whaiaro. Engari he tino whakarihariha ki te hunga e whakaipoipo ana koe te waha haunga, te keke rānei.
Kāore koe i te tino mōhio ki te akuaku ā-ira tangata , ā, i muri i te moe tahi, tera pea he maha ngā hapa akuaku e mahia ana e koe. Mā te kore e tiaki i tō tinana ake ka panaia e koe te aroha kia tawhiti atu.
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14. He nui rawa te hiranga o tō whānau ki a koe
I ētahi wā, ka raru pea koe i te noho hei tama mā te whaea . Ki te whakarongo tonu koe ki ō mātua i mua i te whakatau, ki te waea atu ki a rātou, me te kōrero tonu mō tō whānau, tera pea kei te pana atu koe i te aroha.
He mea noa te whai wāhi atu ki tō whānau i tētahi taumata, engari ki te mea ko tō whānau te mea nui ki a koe , ā, kei te noho mahue tō hoa, he hapa nui tēnei māu.
15. E mataku tonu ana koe kei mutu te whanaungatanga
Tērā pea ka tupu tēnei mena he maha ngā whanaungatanga i rahua i a koe , he iti rānei tō whakaaro ki a koe anō, ā, kei te mataku tonu koe kei mutu te whanaungatanga. He pānga kino tēnei ki te whanaungatanga.
Mā te mahi i tēnei, ehara i te mea kei te whakangaro noa koe i a koe anō i tō whanaungatanga, engari kei te pana atu hoki i te aroha.
Ehara i te mea uaua te aroha me te atawhai i ngā whanaungatanga aroha, engari me tiaki tonu, nō reira kia nui ngā menemene, ngā kata, ngā awhi me ngā kihi i roto i te whānau. Kaua e riri, e noho puku, e pōuri me te whakaari. Ina ko te 'manaaki aroha' te pepeha i roto i te whānau, ka huri aunoa te katoa ki te harikoa.
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Ehara tō takoha i te koha aroha . Mā tēnei ka taea e Bonobology te kawe tonu mai i ngā mōhiotanga hou me ngā mōhiotanga hou ki a koe i roto i tā mātou whainga ki te āwhina i te tangata o te ao ki te ako me pēhea te mahi i tetahi mea.
Pono!
Ko ētahi whanonga ka noho hei tikanga noa iho, ā, kāore tātou e mōhio kei te mahi tātou i aua whanonga mō taua take. Me tino pono, me mārama hoki tātou ki tō tātou hoa, me te whakapuaki i te pono, kaua e kōrero teka noa.
Kāore koe i te whakaaro ko te amuamu mō ngā mea iti, ko te riri mō ngā take wairangi ka puta ake he pakanga me te pouri i roto i tō whanaungatanga? Nō reira, i mua i te mutunga rawa, me mutu tā tātou mahi i ēnei hapa wairangi, ā, me whakapiki ake i te harikoa ki roto i tō tātou whanaungatanga!