He aha te Tangata Tinihanga e Kore ai e Whakaatu i te Ripeneta – 17 Ngā Take Whakamiharo

Kei te whakaaro koe he aha te take kāore ai te tangata tinihanga e whakaatu i te pouri? Mena āe, kei te tino pāngia koe e ngā pānga o te tinihanga a tō hoa. Kei te whakamatea koe e ngā pātai, ā, kei te whakaaro koe he aha te hē o tō whanaungatanga. Tērā pea kua mamae te tinihanga mena i roto koe i te pōuri, ā, tera pea kua kitea he ohorere kino.

Heoi, kāore koe e hiahia ki te whakapae i a koe anō, ki te tango rānei i te kawenga mō te kōwhiringa a tō hoa ki te tuku i tō whakawhirinakitanga. Ina tinihanga te tangata, ā, kāore e whakaatu i te pouri i muri i tana tinihanga, ko rātou te he, ehara i a koe. He maha ngā take mō te kore ripeneta o te kaituku. Ko ētahi o ēnei he tino kino, he hohonu rānei te pūtake, ā, me āwhina pea te kaituku i te tangata tinihanga ki te whakatau i ngā raruraru e pā ana ki a ia.

He aha ahau kāore ai e pouri i muri i te tinihanga?

I mua i te tīmatanga o te āwhina i tētahi hoa kua tinihangatia kia mārama he aha te take kāore ai e puta te pouri o tā rāua hoa rangatira mō āna mahi, me kōrero anō hoki tātou ki te raruraru e pā ana ki tētahi tangata tinihanga – "He aha ahau kāore ai e puta te pouri i muri i te tinihanga?" Ināianei, kia puta ai te pouri pono, me whakaae tuatahi koe, me whakaae rānei, he hē tāu i mahi ai. E whakaatu ana ngā rangahau he nui ake te pouri o ngā tāne i muri i te puremu, ā, ko ngā wāhine i muri i te whanaungatanga aroha. Kotahi te tikanga o te tinihanga me te kore pouri – kāore koe e whakaaro he hara koe.

Kua hoatu pea e koe he take me he whakamārama ki a koe anō hei whakamārama i ō mahi. "I tinihanga ahau nā te mea kāore ia e whakaatu mai i te aroha, i te aroha tinana rānei ki ahau", "I piri tahi ahau me tetahi hoa wahine nā te mea kāore au i kite i tetahi tohu e pouri ana ia mō te whara i ahau ", "He wahine kotahi noa iho, he mahi kotahi noa iho, ā, i tino haurangi ahau." Ina tinihanga te tangata, ā, ka mahi me te mea kāore he mea i tupu, ko te pono he pai ki a ia te mahi pera, ā, ka haere tonu mēnā ka tukuna he wā ki a ia.

Mō te kore e whakama i muri i te tinihanga, e kī ana tētahi kaiwhakamahi Reddit , "Nā te mea pea kāore koe i te tino aroha ki a ia. Kāore au i te mārama me pēhea te tangata e taea ai te tuku i te whakawhirinaki o tētahi e arohaina ana e rātou. Kāore rawa au e takaro ki tētahi tāne i roto i tētahi whanaungatanga. He nui rawa taku whakaute ki taku hoa. Ki te kore koe e makona, haere atu."

17 Ngā Take Whakamiharo e Kore ai te Tangata Tinihanga e Whakaatu i te Ripeneta

He rite te pouri ki te pouri pono, e mōhio ai koe kua hē koe. Tērā pea ka hiahia te tāne, te wahine rānei ki te neke ki te houhanga rongo mā te whakaae ki ngā hapa o mua, me te whakatika i ngā mea kua pakaru i tā rātou whiriwhiri ki te whai wāhi ki ngā mahi moepuku. Tērā pea kei te whakaaro koe, " Ka mamae rānei ngā tāngata tinihanga ? He aha te take kāore ai taku hoa o mua e whakaatu i te pouri?"

Kāore pea te tangata tinihanga e pouri mena kāore i te pono tōna āhua. He nui te tūponotanga kei te tangohia e te tangata tinihanga te wairua whakahihi mai i te puremu. He uaua pea te whakarere i tēnei kare ā-roto. Ko te ngaro o te aroha, ko te whakapehapeha rānei te take e kore ai te tangata tinihanga e pouri. Me hurahia ngā take maha mō te korenga o te pouri i muri i te tinihanga:

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1. E hiahia ana rātou ki te wehe atu i te whanaungatanga 

Tērā pea koe e whakaaro me pēhea e kore ai e whakama te hunga tinihanga. Ko tētahi o ngā take he koretake pea te tangata i roto i te whanaungatanga. Tērā pea ka ngana rātou ki te karo i tēnei. Tērā pea ka hua ake tēnei mahi tinihanga. He ahua hē te tangi, e mōhio ana tātou, engari koinei te pono kino. Tērā pea ka pouri te hoa pēnei engari kāore pea e tino pouri nā te mea kāore rātou i te harikoa i roto i te whanaungatanga.

Nō reira, ki te tahuri tāu tāne, tāu wahine rānei ki tēnei whanonga, kaua e whakararuraru i a koe anō ki te pātai he aha te take kāore ai te tangata tinihanga e whakaatu ana i te pouri. Kāore rawa rātou e tika ana kia pērā. Ka tūtohu atu ahau kia kaua e tangohia mai rātou mēnā ka ngana rātou ki te hoki mai. Ka taea e rātou te whakatau i ngā āhuatanga o ā rātou ake mahi.

2. Kāore rātou e whakaute i a koe

He mea kua oti te whakarite ka noho pono tonu te tokorua e aroha ana. Kāore e ara ake he pātai mō te tinihanga ina he nui te whakamoemiti a te tokorua tetahi ki tetahi. Engari, ki te kore he whakaute, tera pea ka whakaaro te hoa he pai te tinihanga mō te iti o te whakahihiri, te ngahau rānei, ā, he mea noa iho, kāore rātou e whakaatu i tetahi tohu o te pouri pono. Ka warewarehia te hoa kē i roto i ēnei āhuatanga. 

Ki a Adam rāua ko Beth, he tohunga pūmanawa rāua, i huri tēnei kore whakaute hei mahi tinihanga. "Kāore au i te pouri mō te tinihanga i taku wahine," te kī a Adam, me te tāpiri, "He aha ahau ka pena ai mēnā kāore he wahine tinihanga e whakaatu ana i te pouri? I whai hoa aroha anō hoki ia i waho, ā, i kitea e au i tētahi atu. Haunga te whakaaro kāore au i whakautehia, i mamae ahau, ā, i ngaro te whakaute ki a ia. Kāore au i te tino ora, nō reira i rapu au i ētahi atu huarahi."

3. Kāore rātou e mōhio kei te tinihanga rātou

Me pēhea te kore e whakama te hunga tinihanga? He mea rerekē engari kāore pea te tangata e mōhio kei te whiti rātou i te rohe o te pono. Me pēhea tēnei e taea ai, e pātai ana koe? E pā ana tēnei ki te whakamāramatanga o te tinihanga. He moepuku tino nui kei waho o te whanaungatanga, e whakaae ana tātou katoa he tinihanga. Engari me pēhea te whakarōpū i ngā karere whakaipoipo , i te tinihanga kare ā-roto rānei?

Ko tētahi o ngā take e kore ai te tangata tinihanga e whakaatu i te pouri, ko te kore pea o te hara o te tangata tinihanga. Ka nui ake te mamae o tēnei kare ā-roto mēnā ka whakaaro rātou kāore e taea e tā rātou hoa te whakapā atu ki a rātou anō, ā, kei te ngana rātou ki te utu i taua hononga mā te ipurangi, mā ngā karere kuputuhi rānei.

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4. E whakama ana rātou engari e hiahia ana kia memeha atu te kare ā-roto

"Kāore au i te whakama mō te tinihanga i taku tāne, koinei taku i whakaaro ai i te tīmatanga," te kī a Beth, nāna i tinihanga a Adam (me Adam hoki ki a ia), "Engari ko te pono i whakama ahau, ā, he kare kino rawa atu. Kua roa ahau e hiahia ana kia memeha atu tēnei kare, engari kāore au i te mōhio mēnā kua rite ahau ki te whakaae. He raruraru tēnei."

Ko te take kāore te tangata tinihanga e whakaatu ana i te pouri, nā te mea kei te ngana noa rātou ki te karo i te hara. Mā tēnei kare ā-roto ka rite rātou ki te taniwha nā te mea kua mōhio rātou ki te kaha o te mamae i pā ki tō rātou hoa. Ka taea te whakarite i te hara ki tētahi kararehe i roto i te whare herehere e hiahia ana ki te mawhiti. 

He tino kino te āwangawanga e puta mai ana i te tinihanga a tō hoa, me te kore e pouri. Rapua he āwhina mai i tētahi kaiwhakatakoto whakaaro mēnā ka tīmata ngā kare ā-roto i muri i te tinihangatia ki te taumaha rawa atu i runga i tō uma. Ki te rapu āwhina koe mai i tētahi tohunga hauora hinengaro whai raihana, whai pūkenga hoki, kei konei ngā kaiwhakatakoto whakaaro o te rōpū Bonobology hei āwhina i a koe.

5. E pouri ana rātou engari kāore e taea te whakaae

Mena kei reira ētahi tāngata e mau ana i te pouri, ā, e hiahia ana ki te mahi i tēnā, kei reira ētahi atu, te momo egomaniacal, e pehi angitu ana i aua kare ā-roto nā te whakapehapeha, nā te ego rānei. I roto i ēnei āhuatanga, he koretake te pātai, "He aha te hunga tinihanga kāore e pouri?", "Kei te whiwhi te hunga tinihanga i tā rātou karma ?" Kia mahara hoki, tera pea te āhua nei kāore tēnei tangata e aro ki tāna i mahi ai, engari he nui te tūponotanga kei te tino raruraru rātou.

6. Kāore rātou i te whakaaro kua hē tā rātou mahi

Kua kite koe i te tinihanga me te mahi a te tangata me te mea kāore he mea i tupu ? He mea whakarihariha! Nā, he aha te tangata e kore ai e whakaatu i te pouri i muri i tana tinihanga i tetahi atu? Nā te mea e whakaaro ana rātou kāore tā rātou mahi e tika ana kia hara, kāore rānei e hiahia ana ki te whakamārama.

I ētahi wā, ka kitea pea e te tangata he maha ā rāua aroha, nō reira, kāore rātou e hiahia ki te whakamārama i te taea e rātou te aroha ki te tini o te tangata. Me kī rānei he tinihanga tēnei i roto i tēnei āhuatanga? Ki te kore te whakaae a te katoa, ka kiia tonu he tinihanga. Mēnā kua mōhio tō hoa he maha ā rāua aroha, he maha ngā mea hei whakaaroaro mā kōrua hei tokorua. 

7. Te tane paitini

Ko te tangata e whakaaro ana he tika tana ki te tinihanga, tera pea kei a ia ngā āhuatanga kaha o te tāne paitini. He ariā kino tēnei e kore e pā ki te hoa e tinihangatia ana engari ki ngā tāne hoki e mau ana i tēnei tohu hei tohu honore. Ko te tumanako a te hapori mō te ngutu o runga pakari e ako ana i te tini o ngā tāne ko te whakaatu i ngā kare ā-roto pērā i te pouri ehara i te mea tāne. Nō reira, he maha ngā wā ka whakaaro ngā tāne me whakaatu e rātou tētahi momo pakari.

I a au i tētahi wharekai, i te wā e ngana ana ahau ki te tuhituhi mārire, ka rongo ahau i tētahi kōrero mō te tāne kino. Kāore au i te mōhio ki ngā ingoa o te hunga e kōrero ana i a au e whakarongo puku ana, engari hei painga mō tātou, me karanga tātou i a rāua ko Hoani rāua ko Hēni. Te āhua nei kua tinihanga a Hoani i tana hoa, ā, ko Hēni e whawhai ana mō ngā wāhanga o te whakawhirinaki.

"Āe, kāore au i te pouri mō te tinihanga i taku hoa nā te mea kāore au i te whakaaro he kawenga taku ki a ia," te kī a John ki tētahi hoa e ngana ana ki te whakatau i te pakanga, "Kua whakaute tonu ahau i ana hiahia me ana wawata engari kāore au i te whakaaro he kawenga taku ki a ia i ngā wā katoa. I whiriwhiria e au te noho tahi me ia nā te mea i kite ahau i tētahi momo mana motuhake i roto i tēnei hononga. Ko te whai kawenga he tango i te tikanga o taua mea."

"Me pēhea rā te kore e whakama ai te hunga tinihanga!" te karanga noa a Jane. Ki taku whakaaro i hohoro ia ki waho i muri i tēnei kōrero nā te mea kāore au i rongo i te roa o te kōrero.

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8. E riri ana rātou

Ko te riri tētahi o ngā take e kore ai te tangata tinihanga e ripeneta mō āna mahi. Tērā pea ka huri koe hei tangata whakaaro kore. Tērā pea ka meinga te tangata tinihanga kia whakamārama i āna mahi, kaua e pouri, e pouri rānei. Hei tauira, ki te kore te hoa e whiwhi tautoko taketake i roto i te whanaungatanga, i te taatai ​​rānei, ka tinihanga pea rātou, kaua e whakaatu i te riri.

Ā, ki te mea he tinihanga rapu utu, i te mea kua takahi kē te hoa i tā rāua mahi tinihanga, kāore he take e tumanako ai kia kite i ngā tohu o te pouri pono. Ko te tinihanga i roto i tēnei āhuatanga he tohu o ngā raruraru whanaungatanga hohonu ake. Mā te mahi wawe ki ēnei raruraru ka āwhina i a koe ki te mārama ki ngā āwangawanga o tētahi ki tētahi, me te whakawhirinaki tetahi ki tētahi ki te mahi ki aua raruraru. Heoi anō, ko ngā whanaungatanga hauora kei runga i te turanga pakari.

9. Kei te haere tonu te take

Kāore e ara ake te pātai he aha te hunga tinihanga e kore ai e pouri ina kei te haere tonu te whanaungatanga. I roto i tēnei āhuatanga, ka aroha te tangata tinihanga, ka pau rawa i te kare mahana, ā, kāore e pouri, e pouri rānei. I pā tētahi mea rite ki a Anna, he kaihoahoa hua. I mutu tana aroha ki tana hoa rangatira, ā, ka kitea e ia tētahi hoa aroha hou, a Steve, he kaitātari kamupene. "Kāore au i te pouri mō te tinihanga i taku tāne nā te mea i whakaaro ahau ki te whakarērea ia ia," te kī a Anna.

10. E whakaaro ana rātou kei te whakaora rātou i te whanaungatanga

Ehara tēnei i te whakautu e tumanakohia ana e koe ina whakaarohia e koe te take kāore tō hoa e whakaatu ana i te pouri i muri i te tinihanga. He ahua porangi, engari whakarongo mai ki taku kōrero mō tēnei. Mena kāore tētahi hiahia, pērā i te moepuku, e tutuki ana i roto i tētahi whanaungatanga, ka rapu puku pea te tangata i waho. E kore tēnei tangata e whakaaro he mahi tinihanga tēnei engari he mahi whaiaro i mahia e ia hei whakaora i tā rāua whanaungatanga. Mā tēnei tangata ka wehewehea te aroha mai i te hiahia taikaha.

11. E whakapono ana rātou ka murua e koe ō rātou hara

Ina roa kōrua e noho tahi ana, tera pea ka uru te ngākau māhaki ki roto i te whanaungatanga me te kore e mōhiotia e koe. Tērā pea ka tīmata te hoa ki te whakaaro noa kua noa koe, ā, ka whakaaro ia ka murua e koe ō rātou hara mō ngā mea katoa. Tērā pea koinei te take e kore ai te tangata tinihanga e whakaatu i te pouri.

Ki te whiriwhiri koe ki te noho tonu, ki te rapu whakautu ki ngā pātai pēnei i te pēhea e kore ai e whakama te hunga tinihanga, me te tumanako ka hanga anō i tō whanaungatanga me tō hoa, kei te whakaatu noa koe i a rātou he tika. He mea tika kia wehe atu i tētahi whanaungatanga pēnā.

12. He tangata whakahihi rātou 

"Whakaata, whakaata, i runga i te pakitara, ko wai te mea tino ataahua o rātou katoa?" Ki tō whakaaro kua tata tō hoa ki te kōrero i tēnei ki te whakaata whakapaipai? Āe, ka taea hoki e ēnei tāngata te kī ngāwari, "Kāore au i te pouri mō te tinihanga i taku hoa." He take tika kei reira e kore ai e taea e te hunga whakapehapeha te pupuri i ngā whanaungatanga piripono.

He take hinengaro te whakapehapeha, te aroha nui rānei ki a ia anō, ka pā ki ngā hoa e rua i roto i te whanaungatanga. Mā te whakanui i te whakaaro ki a ia anō ka ārai pea i te tangata kia puta te pouri (te aroha rānei). Waihoki, tera pea ahakoa te pouri me te pouri o te tangata, nā te mea i whiua rātou mō te tinihanga, ehara i te mea i hopukina rātou.

13. Kei te noho rātou i roto i te whakakāhoretanga

Ko te whiriwhiri tonu ki te takaro ki te hoa mahi, te tuku karere ki te hoa o mua, me te takaro noa i te takaro noa, i te takaro ipurangi rānei , tera pea he whanonga e whakaaetia ana e rātou. Kāore rātou e whakapono kei te tinihanga rātou. Haunga tēnā, he mea āta whakaarohia ā rātou mahi. I roto i te ao tūturu, he rerekē ki te whakaaro rongonui o te whakakorekore, ko te tangata – i a ia e tinihanga ana – tera pea kei te whakaaro tonu ki a koe.

He kōwhiringa mohio te tinihanga. I ia wā, i ia wā, ka rongo pea rātou i tētahi reo iti e kī ana he hē tā rātou mahi, ā, me mutu. Engari, he aha te take kāore ai e pouri ai ngā kai tinihanga? Nā te mea he maha ā rātou wā e kore ai e aro ki te reo whakaaro nui, me te whakaaro, "Kotahi noa iho tēnei wā" me te "Kāore e kino ngā mea kāore e mōhiotia ana e tō rātou hoa". He whakamarie reka, he whakamarie rangitahi te whakakorenga mō rātou.

14. He hunga tinihanga rātou

Ka akiakihia koe e te hoa tinihanga kia whakapono ki ngā mea rerekē i te pono nā te mea e mataku ana rātou ki te aro atu ki ngā hua o ā rātou mahi. Mēnā kua tinihanga tētahi tangata i roto i tētahi whanaungatanga, tera pea ka whakama rātou, ā, ko te tinihanga pea te otinga tere hei whakatikatika i ō rātou kare ā-roto. Tērā pea ka tinihangatia koe e tētahi tangata kia whakapono ai koe nāu te he o tā rātou tinihanga.

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15. Tērā pea he raruraru hinengaro ō rātou

Ina tinihangatia koe, tērā pea ka ngaro i a koe te tūponotanga he raruraru hinengaro tō hoa e tika ana kia arohia wawe tonu. Ko tētahi o ēnei raruraru he mate hinengaro kore-pāpori, e uru ana ki te tauira o te whakahaere, te whakamahi kino, te takahi rānei i ngā tika o ētahi atu.

Ka taea e au te kōrero anō mō ​​te take o Lyon rāua ko Genna, he tokorua i whakaaro mēnā he pai te whakaora i tō rāua whanaungatanga . He mate hinengaro tō Lyon i kitea i muri i ētahi wā whakaora. I mua i tana takoto ki te tūru o te kaiwhakatakoto whakaaro, ka mea ia, "Kāore au i te pouri mō te tinihanga i taku wahine." Nā te kore o te aroha i porangi ai a Genna.

I konei ka mōhio ia he uaua pea a Lyon ki te mārama ki ēnei kare ā-roto! Mena kei roto koe i tētahi āhuatanga pēnei, he pai pea te titiro ki ngā take hohonu e kore ai te tangata tinihanga e whakaatu i te pouri – tera pea ka mōhio koe me āwhina tō hoa. Ki te āwhina koe i a rātou i roto i ēnei take, me te rongoā me ētahi atu mea, tera pea ka āwhina i a koe ki te whakaū i tō hononga.

16. He tangata tinihanga raupapa rātou

Ina tinihanga tonu tetahi, ka tino heke te pānga ki a ia, ā, ka māmā ake te mahi anō. Koinei te take kāore pea te tangata tinihanga e pouri – mā te whakapau kaha tonu ka whakaiti i te kino. He aha te mea kino atu ka pā mai i tēnei āhuatanga, e pātai ana pea koe? Tērā pea ka pāngia rātou e te haurangi o te tangata tinihanga nā te maha o ngā mahi puremu.

17. Kua kore rātou e aroha ki a koe

E kino ana mātou ki te kōrero atu ki a koe. Engari ko tētahi take pea mō te kore o te pouri o tō hoa tinihanga, ko te rere atu pea o te aroha i roto i tō kōrua hononga. Kāore he take ki te kī, ina ngaro te aroha o te tangata ki a koe, kāore rātou e pupuri i a rātou anō kia pono ki a koe. Ko te tikanga, kāore te pouri, te tono murunga hara rānei e whakaarohia e te tangata kua kore e aroha ki a koe.

Ina tino aroha koe, ā, kua tinihangatia, tera pea ka hiahia koe ki te rapu i ngā take kei muri. Tērā pea ka hiahia koe ki te hoatu ki a rātou te painga o te ruarua, me te whakapono ka taea e koe te ara ake i tēnei raruraru. Heoi, i ētahi wā ka mau ēnei take i roto i ngā whara o mua, i ngā hapa hinengaro rānei. Me whakatau ēnei take mā te awhina a ngā tohunga hauora hinengaro. Ā, ki te mea kua tinihangatia koe, me tiaki koe i a koe anō i te tuatahi. Arotakehia tō tūnga i roto i tō whanaungatanga, kātahi ka haere tonu me te tūpato. Tērā pea he uaua ki te tuku atu, engari waiho mā te wā e tiaki te mamae.

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Ngā momo tāne e toru e pāngia ana e te moepuku, me pēhea te mōhio ki a rātou

10 Ngā Hapa Whakahou Marena Noa Hei Ārai i te Whakaponokore

Ehara tō takoha i te koha aroha . Mā tēnei ka taea e Bonobology te kawe tonu mai i ngā mōhiotanga hou me ngā mōhiotanga hou ki a koe i roto i tā mātou whainga ki te āwhina i te tangata o te ao ki te ako me pēhea te mahi i tetahi mea.

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