(Kua whakarerekētia ngā ingoa hei tiaki i ngā tuakiri)
Ko Divya ahau, he tohunga HR angitu kua huri hei kaitiaki kāinga, ā, koinei taku kōrero mō te āhua o taku noho ki roto i taku marena. Ko te hinganga ki te aroha ki tētahi taitama ataahua ko Alok te ingoa i te kāreti i tino ngāwari. He tino ātaahua ia, ā, i kōrero i ngā mea tika katoa. I tino tere taku aroha ki a ia, ā, i whakatau māua kia marena.
He nui atu te whakahihiri o te mārenatanga ki a ia i te mahi i hiahiatia e au i roto i tētahi kamupene waea rongonui. I ngā marama tuatahi o te mārenatanga i rite ahau ki tētahi kuīni, ā, i roto i ngā marama tekau i manaakitia māua ki tētahi pēpi kōtiro. Kāore au i whakaaro ka rite ahau ki te noho pōuri i roto i tētahi mārenatanga pouri i tētahi rā.
Kei te mauheretia ahau i roto i taku marena
Ripanga o Ihirangi
Nui atu tōku harikoa i te mea kāore i taea e au te tiaki i tā mātou rangatira wahine anake, engari i tere hoki te ahu whakamua i roto i taku mahi. I te wā i whakahawea ai a Alok ki ahau mō aku whakatutukitanga o ia rā i te mahi, kāore au i te mōhio kei te hae ia. I muri mai ka kī mai ia me whakarērea e au taku mahi, ā, me aro ki te hauora me te harikoa o te whānau. I te tīmatanga i whakaroa ahau, engari i tukua e au te patunga tapu nā te aroha ki a ia.
Nā te tiaki i tā māua tamāhine i ea ai te kare o te mate. I whakaaro ahau he mea pai mō māua katoa kia hoatu e au taku mea pai ki tō māua whānau, kāore he whakaritenga. Nō reira i whakaae ahau me te kore ruarua. Ko te mea kāore au i mōhio ko tēnei kua huri hei mea tino kino. te whanau paitini.
I tīmata māna te kimi hapa i roto i aku mahi katoa, ā, muri iho ka whakahē mutunga kore, tae noa ki taku whakaaro kāore au i te mōhio ki tetahi mea. Kāore i roa ka noho ko te kaiwhakahaere kāinga matatau, te tohunga whai hua, hei tangata o mua, ā, ka tīmata ahau te ruarua mēnā he wahine pai ahau, he whaea manaaki hoki. Ka whakamanawa ahau i a au anō kei te tino pai taku whakahaere, engari ko te whakahē me te whakapehapeha a Alok ka taupokina taku whakaaro whaitake.
I mutu taku pātai ki a ia
I te mea e whakawhirinaki ana ahau ki a ia mō aku hiahia katoa, i noho puku ahau ahakoa i hiahia ahau ki te whakahē. I whakaarohia taku tikanga he mataku, ā, ka piki ake tana whanonga pukuriri. Mēnā he mamae tōku upoko, me tū ahau i te taupee, kaua e 'whakararuraru' i a ia ki tōku 'kanohi pōuri' i a ia e waea mai ana, e mātakitaki ana rānei i te pouaka whakaata. I muri i tana kai tina, me noho ahau ki a ia me te ataata, ā, kāore i whakaaetia te kī atu kei te pāngia ahau e te mate. Kāore ahau i whai wāhi ki tēnei kēmu whanaungatanga, he kaiārahi wahangu noa iho, ā, i āwhina i a ia mā te huri i tēnei hei te whakakino i te whanaungatanga i a koe anō.
I kite ahau ko te akiaki i ahau ki te whakarērea i taku mahi angitu he tapahi i ōku parirau, ā, ka whakawhirinaki katoa ahau ki a ia. I kite ōku mātua he tangata harikoa ia, he pūkenga whakawhitiwhiti kōrero pai. Kāore rātou i whakaae kia whakapuaki ahau i ōku whakaaro mōna. I kai ia i te katoa o te whānau — tae atu ki ngā hoa — mai i tana ringa, ā, kāore tetahi e whakapono ehara ia i te tāne pai rawa atu o te ao. Koinā te take nui ake i tīmata ai ahau ki te noho mauhere i roto i te marena.
Te pānui e pā ana: Ka harikoa matou ki nga mea iti: Rakshit Shetty me Rashmika Mandanna
I roto i tētahi marena kino, ka tīmata ahau ki te ngaro i a au anō
Mai i te kotiro kanapa, ataahua, kua riro ahau hei pononga. E toru ngā wā i whakamutua ai taku haputanga e te rata nā te mea kāore a Alok i pai ki te whakamahi i te tiaki. Ko taku tinana ngenge me te wairua whati he pire moe noa iho māna. Kāore i roa ka puta te mamae o te kare ā-roto hei migraines me ētahi atu raruraru hauora. I tukuna ahau e te tohunga hinengaro ki ngā rongoā, ā, i nui ake ngā raruraru, tae atu ki te kore taurite o ngā homoni.
Ahakoa te pōuri o te hinengaro i roto i tētahi tinana pakari, ataahua hoki, i te wā i tūtaki ai a Shashank ki ahau i tētahi pāti, i kite ahau i tētahi hihi o te tumanako i roto i tana ataata. He huihuinga mana tēnei nā te kamupene a Alok, ā, i pōhēhē ahau, i mataku hoki. I ohorere ahau i te kitenga i tētahi karere mai i a Shashank i taku waea i te rā i muri mai. E toru ngā rā i pau i ahau ki te kohikohi i te maia ki te whakautu i taua karere atawhai.
"Kāore koe e hiahia kia noho tonu i roto i te marena nā te mea e tumanakohia ana koe e te hapori."
Mai i taua wā kua tino tūpato māua ki te whakapā atu, ā, e mōhio ana ia ki ōku mamae katoa. He taitamariki a Shashank, engari kei te mau tonu. harikoa te takakau ā, e aroha nui ana ki ahau. Ki ahau nei he rerekē rawa ia i a Alok. E wehewehea ana ahau i waenga i tōku tūranga marena me ōku kawenga, me ngā mea ka taea te noho ki te ao kei mua i a au me tētahi tangata manaaki, ngāwari, aroha hoki.
Kāore he tūponotanga o tētahi o tōku whānau ki te tautoko i ahau ki te whakarere i a Alok. Kei te tuku tonu ahau i ahau ki āna tono, ā, kei te whakaaro ahau kua whakamahia ahau. Kāore te haere ki te kaitohutohu marena i āwhina, engari kua kaha ake te riri o Alok. Kei te haere tonu ahau, me te tumanako kia puta he merekara hei whakarite i tōku haumaru me te neke atu ki tētahi āhuatanga ka taea te ringihia te aroha me te manaaki katoa e tatari mai ana ki ahau ki ahau me taku tamāhine.
He Pānui e Pā Ana: He pūrākau aroha moemoeā i riro hei moemoeā tūturu
Ngā Whakauru a te Tohunga – Me pēhea te wikitoria i te whakaaro kua mauheretia i roto i te marena
He tākuta, he kaiwhakaora hinengaro hoki a Gaurav Deka kei Delhi. I kōrero mātou ki a ia mō te āhua o te noho pūmau i roto i te marena, me te pānga kino ki a koe. Koinei tāna whakautu:
Ko te take i whiriwhiri ai tātou kia noho tonu i roto i tētahi whanaungatanga kino ko te wehi: "Me pēhea mēnā ka wehe atu ahau, ā, ka kino haere ngā mea?" Ka tukua tātou kia tukinotia nā te mea e mataku tonu ana tātou ki te 'huringa'. Kei te noho tātou i tētahi taiao hē, e whakatoihia ana tātou i ia rā, i ia rā, e tukinotia ana, e tukinotia ana - ka arahi tēnei ki te korenga o te maia me te he iti te kiritauI te nuinga o te wā, nā te mea kua maha ngā wā ka pāngia tātou e te tukino, ka mutu tā tātou whakapono kāore pea tetahi e aroha mai ki a tātou.
Ko te whakaaro nui mō te tangata e mau ana i roto i tētahi whanaungatanga tukino kare ā-roto koia tēnei, "E whakamamae ana tēnei tangata i ahau, engari he pai ki ahau te noho ki muri. He rite ki te kāinga tonu ahakoa e tukino ana ia i ahau, ā, mehemea ka whakarērea ia e ahau, ā, kāore he tangata hei aroha ki ahau? Ka aha rā?" Koinei anake te take e whiriwhiri ai te tangata kia mau tonu i roto i tētahi marena kino.
I haere mai tētahi pononga wahine ki te kōrero mai ki ahau mō te whiunga tonu a tana tāne i a ia. I kī tonu ahau kia whakarērea ia e ia, engari kāore ia i pena. I tētahi rā ka haere mai ia ki te kōrero mai kua mutu te whiunga. I mihi atu ahau ki a ia, engari i tangi ia, ā, i mea mai kei te tino mataku ia inaianei kāore tana tāne e whiu ana i a ia; ko te tikanga o tēnā (ki a ia) tera pea kei te whai wāhi ia ki tētahi atu wahine, ā, kua kitea hoki e ia ētahi mea. taunakitanga tinihanga o taua mea anō. Koinei te mea ka pā ki tō tātou whakaaro nui ki a tātou anō i roto i tētahi whanaungatanga pēnei, ā, koinei te tīmatanga – ka tīmata koe ki te rongo kua mauheretia koe i roto i te marena.
Kia maumahara, i te wā i whānau mai ai koe, hei tangata, i tukuna ki a koe te taonga o te 'whakaaro noa'. Ā, ko te tikanga o te whakaaro noa ko te 'kōwhiri'. Whakamahia taua kōwhiringa, ā, haere tonu. Kāore he pānga o te tukino a tēnei tangata i a koe ki a koe. He pānga ki 'ia ia' me ōna whakaaro hē mō te mana me te whakapehapeha. Nō reira, kaua rawa e hoatu he mana ki tētahi hei mea i a koe kia mea 'Kei te mauheretia ahau i roto i taku marena'. Haere atu, awhi i tētahi oranga pai ake me tētahi e aroha ana ki a koe, engari e tuku ana hoki i a koe ki te whakatau i āu ake kōwhiringa!
(E ai ki te kōrero ki a Sanjeev Trivedi)
FAQs
Ki te mea kei te mauheretia koe i roto i tētahi whanaungatanga, kua tae ki te wā ki te pātai i taua whanaungatanga mai i te tīmatanga. He aha ā rātou whanonga, ā, kua pēhea rātou i huri ai kia pēnei ai ō whakaaro? He nui ake tō kore whakamarie i tō aroha? Ki te mea kei te pērā koe, tera pea koinei tētahi o ngā mea e kore e pai ki a koe. ngā tohu wehenga me whiriwhiri rānei koe i te ratonga tohutohu.
Kaua rawa e whakaarohia te pouri i roto i ngā marena, i ngā whanaungatanga rānei kia noa. Ae, he wā uaua kei reira ka taea e koe te noho pōuri mō ētahi wā, engari he mea morearea te pouri mō te wā roa, ā, he take hei āwangawanga. Tērā pea kei roto koe i tētahi marena kino.
Ina mutu te hanga i a koe hei tangata pai ake. Ki te kore tō marena, tō hoa rānei e tāpiri ana i tētahi mea whai hua ki tō oranga hei whakapai ake i a koe, he aha te take o reira? Whakaarohia tēnei me te hohonu, ā, ki te mea kei te mauheretia koe e te marena, kaua e mangere ki te whakapuaki i taua mea anō.
Thoughts Final
He wheako tūturu, he wheako mamae hoki te mauhere i roto i te marena, engari kāore koe i te kore mana. Ahakoa mā te whakawhitiwhiti kōrero, te whakatakoto rohe, te rapu āwhina, te whakatau uaua rānei ki te wehe atu, he mea nui tō harikoa me tō oranga. Ā mātou tohunga whanaungatanga ka āwhina i a koe ki te whakatere i ō kare ā-roto, te tūhura i ō kōwhiringa, me te whakahoki mai i tō harikoa.
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Ehara tō takoha i te koha aroha . Mā tēnei ka taea e Bonobology te kawe tonu mai i ngā mōhiotanga hou me ngā mōhiotanga hou ki a koe i roto i tā mātou whainga ki te āwhina i te tangata o te ao ki te ako me pēhea te mahi i tetahi mea.
