Kodi Narcissists Amatha Kukondana?

Kodi narcissists amatha kukondana? Ili ndi funso lomwe limalemera m'malingaliro a anthu ambiri omwe apirira machitidwe achikondi a narcissistic of idealization, devaluation, kutaya, and hoovering. Ngati inunso mukulimbana nazo, dziwani kuti simuli nokha.

Timamvetsetsa momwe ubale ndi narcissist ungakhalire wodetsa nkhawa komanso wosokoneza. Ndipo zingakulepheretseni kukhulupirira kuti munthu amene akuyambitsa chisokonezo chonsechi m’moyo wanu sangakhale wokhoza kukukondani. Komabe, zoona zake, munthu wa narcissist amatha kukonda wina koma malingaliro ake amakhala osakhalitsa komanso owoneka bwino.

Kodi "kungolankhula mwachisawawa komanso mopanda pake" kumatanthauza chiyani? Kodi zimenezi zimatanthauzira bwanji khalidwe lawo muubwenzi? Kuti tikuthandizeni kupeza mayankho, tiyeni tiwone mozama zovuta za munthu wokonda kwambiri zachiwerewere pokambirana ndi katswiri wa zamaganizo komanso katswiri wa zamaganizo ku California, Dr. Shefali Batra (MD mu matenda amisala), yemwe ndi katswiri pa uphungu wokhudza kulekana ndi kusudzulana, kusudzulana ndi chibwenzi, komanso nkhani zokhudzana ndi kuyanjana kwa anthu asanakwatirane. Koma choyamba, tiyeni tiwonetsetse kuti mwamvetsa kuti munthu wokonda kwambiri zachiwerewere ndi ndani kwenikweni.

Kodi Narcissist Ndi Ndani?

Mawu akuti narcissist nthawi zambiri amaponyedwa mozungulira kuti afotokoze aliyense yemwe ali ndi chidwi chofuna kusangalatsidwa ndi chidwi, komanso mtima wodzikonda. Komabe, si aliyense amene amasangalala ndi zochulukirapo kuposa momwe amadzikondera okha ndi munthu wokonda narcissist.

Lingaliro lina lolakwika ndiloti kuwonetsa khalidwe la narcissistic ndilofanana ndi kukhala ndi vuto la umunthu wa narcissistic (NPD). Komabe, zimenezonso n’zatali ndi choonadi. Narcissism ilipo pa sipekitiramu ndipo anthu okhawo omwe ali kumapeto kwenikweni kwamtunduwu ndi omwe amawonedwa kuti ali ndi vuto la umunthu wa narcissistic.

Malinga ndi Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, kope lachisanu (DSM-5) , munthu akhoza kupezeka ndi NDP ngati akuwonetsa zizindikiro zisanu kapena kuposerapo mwa izi:

• Kudzikuza kudziona kukhala wofunika
• Mawonetseredwe a grandiosity
• Makhalidwe ndi khalidwe lodzikuza
• Kusirira ena
• Kupanda chifundo
• Kudyera masuku pamutu ena kuti apindule
• Kutanganidwa ndi zongopeka za mphamvu zopanda malire, luntha, kukongola, kapena kupambana
• Kufunika kosilira
• Kudzimva kuti ndinu woyenera

Dr. Batra anati: “Narcissism imadziwika ndi kusadziona ngati munthu wofunika, kudziona kuti ndiwe wosafunika, komanso kusadziona kuti ndiwe weni ndipo kumapangitsa kuti munthu asamaganize bwino, zomwe zimaoneka ngati munthu wongoganizira za iye mwini, wosamvera chisoni komanso wongofuna kuti azichita zinthu.”

Kusiyana kumeneku n'kofunika chifukwa malinga ndi kafukufuku wokhudza US , akuluakulu 0.5%-5% okha ndi omwe ali ndi NPD. Ngati munthu ali ndi zizolowezi zina zodzikonda, akhozabe kukhala ndi chikondi mofanana ndi momwe wina aliyense angachitire. Ndipo ngati muli ndi munthu wotere, simungafunse kuti, "Kodi munthu wodzikonda angathe kukonda?"

Zedi, pakhoza kukhala zovuta zina za ubale panjira. “Komabe, mikhalidwe imeneyi mwa anthu amene ali m’munsi mwa narcissism sipekitiramu yofatsa kwambiri moti sangakhudze luso lawo lokonda munthu wina.” Komano, mikhalidwe ya NPD imalepheretsa munthu kukonda wina, makamaka m’njira imene anthu ambiri amamvetsetsa chikondi,” Dr. Batra akuwonjezera motero.

Tsopano popeza takonza izi, tiyeni tikuthandizeni kuyankha mafunso ena ochepa omwe angakuthandizeni kuthana ndi vuto lanu: Kodi anthu okonda kumwa mowa mwauchidakwa amatha kukonda? Kodi narcissist amasonyeza bwanji chikondi?

Kuwerenga Kofanana: Kodi Zitsanzo za Khalidwe Lodzikonda Mu Ubwenzi Ndi Ziti?

Momwe Mungadziwire Ngati Narcissist Amakukondani

Narcissism ndi chikondi siziyenderana bwino. Zowonadi, wamatsenga, wokongola komanso wachikoka momwe aliri, akhoza kukuchotsani pamapazi anu ndi manja awo akulu ndi ziwonetsero zachikondi. Panthawi imeneyo, mafunso ngati okonda narcissists ndi okondana kapena momwe munthu wamatsenga amasonyezera chikondi sangapite m'maganizo mwanu chifukwa munthu amene ali patsogolo panu amamva bwino kwambiri.

Komabe, pamene chikondi cha kudzikonda chikupita, gawo ili - lodziwika kuti idealization ndipo limadziwika ndi chikondi-bombing - nthawi zambiri limakhala lakanthawi kochepa komanso lochita malonda (limadalira momwe limakhudzira kufunikira kwawo kwa kudzikonda). Chifukwa cha izi, amavutika kusunga maubwenzi abwino m'moyo wawo kapena malingaliro enieni kwa munthu wina.

Mfundo yake ndi yakuti, sikochitika kuti munthu wokonda narcissist ayambe kukondana mpaka kalekale. Chifukwa chake, ngati mukuganiza kuti mungadziwe bwanji ngati narcissist amakukondani, dzifunseni:

• Kodi amalingalira zosoŵa zanu ndi malingaliro anu?
• Kodi amakuchitirani ulemu?
• Kodi amatenga udindo pazochita zawo?
• Kodi angayamikireni?
• Kodi amalemekeza malire anu mu chiyanjano?
• Kodi amayamikira maganizo anu ndi maganizo anu?
• Ndipo chofunika kwambiri, kodi amatha kuika zosowa zanu patsogolo ngakhale pamene sangapindule chilichonse?

Ngati mwayankha mafunso awa motsimikiza, muli ndi narcissist m'chikondi ndi inu. Komabe, Dr. Batra anachenjeza kuti: “Mpata woti zimenezi zichitike n’ngochepa kwambiri nthaŵi zambiri chifukwa munthu wosuta sangakonde pokhapokha ngati ali wokonzeka kuyesetsa kukonza khalidwe lawo ndi mmene amaganizira.” Zimenezi zimafuna kudziganizira mozama komanso kudzifufuza, zomwe zingakhale zochititsa mantha komanso zochititsa mantha kwa wosuta.”

Kawirikawiri, munthu wodzikonda kwambiri amasankha kugwiritsa ntchito njira zodzionetsera, kuunikira mpweya , ndi njira zina zosocheretsa anthu m'malo mochita zinthu zamkati kuti asiye machitidwe ake.

Kuwerenga Kofanana: Mawu 33 Oletsa Kuunikira Gasi Ndi Kutontholetsa Ounikira Gasi

Kodi Narcissists Amatha Kukondana?

Kodi anthu odzikonda okha amatha kukonda ena? Funso ili likhoza kukhala lovuta kuliyankha chifukwa chikondi chodzikonda nthawi zambiri chimakhala chodzikonda, monga mbali ina iliyonse ya moyo wawo, ndipo chili kutali ndi malingaliro a maubwenzi ofunika komanso maubwenzi abwino omwe ena amawagwirizanitsa ndi chikondi.

Dr. Batra akufotokoza kuti, “Vuto loti anthu okondana narciss kukhala okhoza chikondi limachokera ku chenicheni chakuti chikho chawo cha chikondi chopereka chadzaza kale.” Amadzikonda okha.

"Ngati mukuona kuchokera ku lingaliro la chisinthiko, chikondi chawo chaumwini chili choyenera chifukwa sanachilandire kuchokera kwa aliyense. Koma m'dziko lenileni, sichinthu chomveka, chosavomerezeka, komanso chosagwira ntchito bwino. Chifukwa chake amatembenukira kwa omwe amawasamalira - ndichifukwa chake anthu okondana komanso odzikonda nthawi zambiri amakopeka - koma ubalewo ndi wamalonda okha osati chikondi chenicheni chomwe mumachiwona kwina.

"Adzawasamalira komanso kuwasamalira, koma nthawi yomwe munthu wokondedwayu amawatsutsa kapena osadzipatsa ulemu, amawakana ndipo amamva chisoni mkati mwake." Chifukwa chake, kuti muyankhe funso lanu - kodi munthu wokonda narcissistic amatha kukonda? - osati m'lingaliro lenileni la mawuwo. Dr. Batra akutchula zifukwa zomwe munthu wamatsenga sangathe kukonda munthu wina ndi mtima wonse:

• Sasamala kapena kumva kuti ali pafupi ndi aliyense chifukwa ubongo wawo sunakonzekere kutero
• Sangayang'ane kupyola pa zosowa zawo
• Amakhala ndi chibadwa chodzitetezera kwambiri kotero kuti kusamala kwawo komanso kukhudzidwa kwawo pakukanidwa kumawapangitsa kukhala opupuluma.
• Zitsanzo zosatetezedwa zamkati zogwirira ntchito zimawapangitsa kudziwona ngati osayenera kapena osafunika
• Pathologically kukhala wovuta muzochitika zomwe sizili pakati pa chidwi

Kuwerenga Kofanana: Momwe Mungatulukire mu Ubale Wosauka: Buku Lotsogolera Gawo ndi Gawo

“Ngati pali munthu wina amene amakukondani, kapena akudzinenera kukhala, kuti aone ngati mmene akumvera ndi zoona, muyenera kungoyang’ana kupyola pa mawu awo—omwe ali ndi njira yawo—ndi kuwona mmene amakuchitirani.

Pamapeto pake, zimatengera mfundo yakuti munthu wamatsenga amatha kukonda munthu wina koma sichingakhale chikondi chenicheni, chopanda malire chomwe mungayembekezere muubwenzi wapamtima. Sangakonde munthu moona mtima.

Kodi narcissist amaganiza kuti chikondi ndi chiyani?

Monga tidanenera, narcissist amatha kukonda mwaukadaulo koma lingaliro lawo la momwe chikondi chimamverera likhoza kusokonekera. Dr. Batra anati: “Chikondi chopanda chinyengo n’chopanda lingaliro la kubwezerana.

Ngati mukudabwa kuti, “Kodi munthu wa narcissist angakonde?”, dziwani kuti zomwe amaziona ngati chikondi zimayenderana ndi machitidwe awo osowa chidwi, kudzikuza, komanso kusilira. Chikondi cha narcissist, pamapeto pake, chimafika ku:

• Kudziona kuti n'ngoyenerera kumene kumawachititsa kuganiza kuti ayenera kuwakonda
• Kufunika kosilira kopanda malire kuchokera kwa anzawo
• Ziwonetsero zazikulu za chikondi ndi mawonetseredwe a chikondi chosatha popanda kugwirizana kulikonse
• Chisangalalo chosangalatsa chomwe chimawapangitsa kudzimva bwino

Izi zimapangitsa kuti pakhale mgwirizano wapachimake womwe nthawi zambiri umatsegulira njira yoti pakhale mgwirizano wa mbali imodzi komanso woopsa pamene ubalewo ukupita patsogolo.

Kuwerenga Kofanana: Njira ya Grey Rock: Tanthauzo, Njira, ndi Njira Zoigwiritsira Ntchito Moyenera

Kodi narcissist amasonyeza bwanji chikondi?

Kodi narcissists ndi okondana? Inde, munthu wokondana narcissist angakhale wachikondi kwambiri, wokongola, wochotsera zida, ndi wachikondi, makamaka kumayambiriro kwa chibwenzi. Koma kodi munthu wokonda narcissism amatha kukondana? Ndikuganiza, pofika pano, mukudziwa kuti yankho la funsoli ndi lomveka, lomveka ayi - osachepera, bola ngati mukuwona kumvetsetsa kwawo ndi kusonyeza chikondi kuchokera ku momwe chikondi chikuwonekera mu ubale wathanzi.

Ndikofunikira kudziwa kugwirizana kumeneku pakati pa narcissism ndi chikondi kuti tisatengeke ndi momwe munthu wamatsenga amasonyezera chikondi. Malinga ndi Dr. Batra, izi zikuphatikizapo:

• Kutengeka ndi kufunikira kokondedwa ndi kuyamikiridwa ndi abwenzi awo okondana
• Kuwongolera mwachikondi kudzera mu zionetsero zazikulu za chikondi
• Chikondi-kuphulitsa anzawo
• Kuwasesa pamapazi awo ndi mphatso ndi ziyamiko
• Nthawi zonse lankhulani zinthu zoyenera pa nthawi yoyenera kuti mukope ndikuchotsa zida

Izi zimapangitsa kuti ubale ukhale wolimba mtima kwambiri, zomwe zimapangitsa kuti pakhale mavuto aakulu. Kafukufuku wofalitsidwa mu Journal of Personality and Social Psychology akusonyeza kuti ichi ndi chifukwa chake anthu odzikonda amalephera paubwenzi wa nthawi yayitali komanso wodzipereka koma amatha kupambana pa chibwenzi cha nthawi yochepa.

Zoyenera Kuchita Ngati Mukukondana Ndi Narcissist

Kukhala ndi munthu wodzikonda komanso kukhala wosangalala kuli ngati kuyesa kudzaza chidebe ndi dzenje lalikulu pansi. Ngati mumakonda munthu wodzikonda, kudzisunga kuyenera kukhala chinthu chofunika kwambiri ndipo zimenezo zimayamba ndi kumvetsetsa kuti chikondi chenicheni si chodzikonda, chogwiritsa ntchito molakwika, chansanje, kapena chodzitamandira. Koma mukakhala paubwenzi ndi munthu wodzikonda, ndicho chimene mumapeza m'dzina la chikondi. Chodzaza ndi poizoni, nthabwala, ndi zoopsa. Chifukwa munthu wodzikonda akadziwa kuti mumamukonda, ndichifukwa chake amakubweretserani zizolowezi zake zonse zoopsa.

Mutha kudzipeza nokha mukuyatsidwa ndi gasi, kuphulitsa kwachikondi, kupusitsa, komanso ngakhale kuzunzidwa. Ngati zinthu zafika poipa kwambiri, muyenera kupempha thandizo.

Ngati muli pachiwopsezo, imbani 9-1-1.
Kuti mupeze thandizo losadziwika, lachinsinsi, 24/7, chonde imbani Nambala Yachibadwidwe Yadziko Lonse pa 1-800-799-7233 (SAFE) kapena 1-800-787-3224 (TTY).

Komabe, ngati mwawona zizolowezi za mnzanuyo mutangoyamba kumene, pali njira zoyendetsera ubalewo ndikuchepetsa kupwetekedwa mtima komwe kungakubweretsereni. Ngakhale kuti sizingakhale zenizeni kuyembekezera kuti mutha kukhala ndi munthu wamatsenga ndikukhala osangalala, njira zotsatirazi zingakuthandizeni kudziteteza:

• Khazikitsani malire: Ndikofunikira kukhazikitsa ndikukhazikitsa malire a ubale wabwino pamene muli pachibwenzi ndi narcissist. Ngati zitachitika msanga, izi zitha kukuthandizani kwambiri kukutetezani ku nkhanza zachipongwe
• Yesetsani kudzisamalira: Osataya mtima paubwenzi. Kufunika kwa okondedwa wanu kumusirira, chidwi, ndi kukondedwa ndi dzenje lopanda malire. Muyenera kukonzanso nthawi ndi nthawi, kupendanso zomwe mumayika patsogolo, ndikuganiziranso za inu nokha
• Dziphunzitseni: Kudziwa ndi kuzindikira zomwe mukukumana nazo ndi njira yabwino yothanirana nazo bwino. Phunzirani momwe mungathere za vuto la umunthu wa narcissistic ndi zotsatira zake pa maubwenzi. Izi zidzakukonzekeretsani kuthana ndi zovuta zaubwenzi zikayamba
• Funsani uphungu: Kuvutika maganizo ndi kupwetekedwa mtima kokhala m'chikondi ndi narcissist kungakhale kwakukulu. Therapy imapereka malo otetezeka kuti mufufuze zambiri zosokoneza zomwe mungakhale mukulimbana nazo ndikuzikonza. Njirayi ingakhale yopindulitsa kwambiri pozindikira zomwe zikukuyambitsani, kukulitsa luso lothana ndi vuto, ndikupeza zomwe mukufuna nokha.
• Limbikitsani wokondedwa wanu kuti akuthandizeni: NPD ndi vuto lalikulu laumoyo lomwe limafunikira chithandizo choyenera ndi chithandizo. Komabe, anthu amene ali ndi vuto limeneli nthawi zambiri safuna kupempha thandizo chifukwa sali okonzeka kuvomereza kuti chinachake chalakwika ndi iwo. Ngakhale simungathe kupangitsa wokondedwa wanu kupeza chithandizo chomwe akufunikira, zingakhale zothandiza kumulimbikitsa kuti apeze izi mwa kusintha malingaliro awa kwa iwo.

Zonsezi, narcissism ndi chikondi sizigwirizana. Ngati mudabwera kuno mukuyembekeza yankho lina la "Kodi anthu okonda zamatsenga amatha kukondana", pepani kuti ndakukhumudwitsani. Koma kutsegula maso anu kuti muwone zenizeni za momwe zinthu zilili ndikofunikira kwambiri kuti muthane nazo momwe mungathere. Ndipo ndicho chimene ife tadzera pano. Kukuthandizani kupeza mayankho ndi njira yopitira patsogolo ngakhale pazovuta kwambiri m'moyo.

7 Masitepe Mu Narcissistic Ubale Chitsanzo Ndi Momwe Mungawapewere 

Kuwonetsa Narcissist - Zomwe Muyenera Kudziwa

Kodi Zitsanzo Zotani za Narcissistic Behaviour mu Ubale?

Chopereka chanu sichikutanthauza chopereka chachifundo . Chidzalola Bonobology kupitiliza kukubweretserani chidziwitso chatsopano komanso chaposachedwa poyesetsa kuthandiza aliyense padziko lonse lapansi kuphunzira momwe angachitire chilichonse.

Onani Ndondomeko Yathu Yolembera

Kumanani ndi Bungwe Lathu Lowunika

Gawani Ndemanga

Ndemanga zanu ndi zotani?

×

zothandiza Nenani Cholakwika Zina

kugonjera