Kusukela ekuhambeni endleleni kuya 'kuze kusehlukanise ukufa', umshado ungaba umgwaqo ohamba isikhathi eside. Njengoba nabelana ngalolu hambo njengabashadikazi, nizulazula emigudwini eminingi endleleni, akuvamile ukuthi abashadile bahlukane. Ibanga eliwumphumela lingaholela ezinkingeni eziningi, ezinye ongase ukwazi ukuzinqoba, kuyilapho ezinye zingabangela umonakalo ohlala njalo esibophweni sakho. Uma owesifazane ephelelwa isithakazelo kumyeni wakhe, isibonelo, kungase kube i-curveball ongase ungakulungele ukuyiphatha.
Kwabesifazane, ukuxhumana ngokomzwelo kubalulekile ukuze bahlale betshalwe ebudlelwaneni babo. Uma owesifazane elahlekelwa isithakazelo kumngane wakhe womshado, kuwukubonakaliswa okuqondile kwalokho kuxhumana kulahlekelwa ukujula kwakho. Nakuba engase aphume noma angaphumeleli emshadweni onjalo, isithakazelo sakhe esinciphayo kumlingani wakhe ngokuqinisekile siyoba nomthelela eqophelweni lobuhlobo.
Lapho owesifazane ephelelwa isithakazelo kowesilisa, ingxenye yakhe iyahlehla futhi ingafinyeleleki. Noma engasho ngamagama angaka, uzosala nomuzwa onganyakazi, “Umkami waphelelwa isithakazelo”. Ake sibheke ngokujulile izimpawu zomfazi ophelelwa isithakazelo kumyeni nokuthi kwenzekani lapho.
Izinto Eziyi-11 Ezenzeka Uma Umuntu Wesifazane Ephelelwa Isithakazelo Endodeni Yakhe
Okuqukethwe
Wake waba nomuzwa wokuthi umkakho akaseyena umngane womshado ayenguye ngaphambili? Mhlawumbe, ubonakala ekude noma ukwenza uzizwe sengathi akasenandaba nezinto ezake zabaluleka kuye. Ungase uchithe isikhathi esiningi uzibuza, “Umkami akanandaba nami. Yini eyonakele ebuhlotsheni bethu?” Lokhu kungase futhi kukuholele ekuzibuzeni: kungani alahlekelwa isithakazelo kungazelelwe?
Zibuze: Ingabe waphelelwa isithakazelo kungazelelwe? Ngokunokwenzeka, lokhu konakala kwenzeka kancane kancane futhi kancane kancane ngokuhamba kwesikhathi, futhi kungase kube nenqwaba yezimbangela ezingokomzimba nezingokomzwelo ngemuva kwakho. Owesifazane ongenasithakazelo kumyeni cishe wayesebenzelana isikhathi eside ukunganakwa ngokomzwelo ebudlelwaneni. Kungenzeka ukuthi usuqaphele manje ukuthi izimpawu zokungabi nandaba kwakhe sezibonakala kakhulu.
Ngokungangabazeki, kungase kubangele ukudideka okukhulu ngokuthi yini ebangela ukuba owesifazane aphelelwe isithakazelo kumyeni wakhe nomthelela wako emshadweni. Ukuze ukwazi ukubhekana nale nkinga yomshado engase ibe yingozi, udinga ukuqonda kuqala ukuthi kwenzekani lapho owesifazane elahlekelwa isithakazelo kumyeni wakhe:
Ukufunda Okuhlobene: Kuthatha Isikhathi Esingakanani Ukuphuma Othandweni?
1. Akakukhumbuli
Phakathi kwezinto ezenziwa abantu besilisa ezenza abantu besifazane baphelelwe umdlandla wukungababeki phambili abantu abathandana nabo. Lokhu kuntula ukunakwa kuvame ukulandelwa ngokwenza abashade nabo bazizwe benecala ngokufuna isikhathi sabo nokunakwa okungahlukanisiwe. Ukungatholakali komzwelo okuhambisana icala ebudlelwaneni kungaba esinye sezimbangela ezisemqoka ezingokomzwelo ezimenza aphelelwe isithakazelo kuwe.
UJane, oseshade no-Andrew iminyaka engu-15, wezwa ubuhlungu kwaze kwaba yilapho engasamthandi. “U-Andrew wayematasa ngomsebenzi wakhe kangangokuthi ukugxila kwakhe emshadweni wethu kwaqhubeka kuncipha.” Ngisho nalapho esekhaya, wayekhathele noma ematasa kakhulu ukuba angakwazi ukuxoxa noma ukwenza izinto nami.
“Ngangilokhu ngizama ukufinyelela kuye, ngimncenga futhi ngiphikisana naye ukuze ngithole isikhathi esengeziwe ngathi. Kodwa imizamo yami yayihlangatshezwa izaba noma ukulwa. Ngakho, ngesinye isikhathi, ngazitshela ukuthi akangidingi yini, nami angingidingi. Kwakuyithuba elide lokufunda kodwa ngathola ukuthi ngingamzwela kanjani, futhi ekugcineni, ngayeka ukumkhumbula nesidingo sokuba nomyeni wami onenjongo,” kusho yena.
Uma owesifazane ephelelwa isithakazelo endodeni, akaphuthelwa ukuba khona kwakhe empilweni yakhe. Ngisho noma beshadile futhi besahlala ngaphansi kophahla olulodwa, ingxenye yakhe ihlehla ebuhlotsheni ngokuphelele. Umuzwa othi “umkami uphelelwe isithakazelo kimi” ungase ufike lapho nje eseweqe lowo mngcele, futhi kuleli qophelo, ungase uqale ukuzwa ibanga phakathi kwenu nobabili. Kodwa uma ubhekisisa, izimpawu zokuthi umkakho uphelelwa isithakazelo kungenzeka ukuthi kade zakha, kuphela azizange zikubambe kwaze kwahlwa.
2. Uhlelo lwakhe lugcwele kakhulu
Lapho uJane enquma ukuthi wayengeke esaphusha umyeni wakhe ukuba achithe isikhathi naye noma akhulise umshado, kwakunombuzo owodwa owawumgqolozele ebusweni: ukuthi angakuvumeli kanjani kumphazamise. “Ukuze ngivale ukungabikho kwakhe - ikakhulukazi ngokomzwelo kodwa nasemzimbeni - ngaqala ukugxila ezintweni ezazibaluleke kakhulu kimina.
“Ngathatha umthwalo owengeziwe emsebenzini, ngaqala ukuvolontiya endaweni yokukhosela izilwane ngezimpelasonto, futhi ngavuselela ukuphila kwami komphakathi.” Phakathi kokukhulisa izingane zethu ezimbili, umsebenzi wami, umsebenzi wokuzithandela, nokuchitha isikhathi nabangane, sasingekho nje isikhathi sokubamba umoya futhi ngicabange ngalokho okwakushoda emshadweni wami,” usho kanje. Lokhu akuvamile lapho owesifazane elahlekelwa isithakazelo kumyeni wakhe.
NjengoJane, abanye besifazane abaningi bazama ukunxephezela ukuntuleka kokuxhumana okungokomzwelo nabashade nabo ngokwenza umshado ongathatha izinhliziyo nezingqondo zabo. Yingakho, lapho noma yimuphi owesifazane eqala ukulahlekelwa isithakazelo ebuhlotsheni, angase azakhele ukuphila okuhambisanayo lapho ingekho indawo yomlingani wakhe. Kuleli qophelo, umbuzo uwukuthi, uzokwenzani: hlala futhi ulwe gcina umshado wakho noma ahambe lapho ephelelwa isithakazelo?
Ukufunda Okuhlobene: Izinto Ezi-5 Okufanele Uzenze Nomlingani Wakho Ukuze Uvuselele Impilo Yakho Yothando
3. Uphelelwa izinto azokutshela zona
Ingabe umkakho ovame ukutshiyoza futhi oxoxayo ngokuzumayo uphelelwe izinto azozisho kuwe? Ungase umbuze imibuzo mayelana nosuku lwakhe, futhi aphendule nge-monosyllabic, "Kuhle" noma "O, bekukuhle". Noma yibuphi ububanzi bezingxoxo ezithinta inhliziyo nokuxhumana okuqinile buyashabalala lapho owesifazane ephelelwa isithakazelo kumyeni wakhe. Uma uzibuza ukuthi uzosho kanjani lapho owesifazane ephelelwa isithakazelo, lokhu kungaba isipho esifile ngakho qaphela kakhulu izinga lokuxhumana ebudlelwaneni bakho.
Uma engasakuthumeli ngezinkinga zehhovisi noma ukuthi izingane zimkhuphulela kanjani odongeni, kungenzeka ukuthi usekude futhi engasenandaba. Lesi ngesinye sezibonakaliso ezitshela kakhulu ukuthi unkosikazi uphelelwa isithakazelo kumyeni. Kungase kukwenze uzibuze: kungani alahlekelwa isithakazelo kungazelelwe? Kodwa bheka emuva, futhi uzibonele. Ingabe lokhu akubonisi indlela ophendule ngayo emibuzweni yakhe, ezindabeni, nasezingxoxweni esikhathini esidlule?
Cha, lokho akusho ukuthi ukunambitha umuthi wakho kodwa ukuthi usephelelwe isithakazelo sangempela sokwenza umzamo. Kungenzeka ngoba awuzange uhlangane naye phakathi ngesikhathi esazama yakha futhi ujulise ukusondelana ngokomzwelo kanye nokuxhumana. Nokho, akukephuzi kakhulu ukulungisa inkambo. Manje njengoba usuqala ukuqonda ukuthi kungani inkosikazi iphelelwa isithakazelo kumyeni, sebenzela ukulungisa umonakalo ngokulungisa.
4. Kunalokho uthulula isifuba kwabanye
Olunye uphawu olungenakugwemeka lowesifazane ophelelwa isithakazelo kumngane wakhe womshado ukuthi uqala ukuncika kwabanye abantu abasendingilizini yakhe yangaphakathi ukuze ahlangabezane nezidingo zakhe ezingokomzwelo. Kungenzeka ukuthi uthole indlebe kumphathi wakhe ngokufika ngemuva kwesikhathi esethulweni ngoba izingane zavele zavuka umbhejazane mayelana nokuya esikoleni. Kodwa, ngokusekelwe kokuhlangenwe nakho kwakhe kwesikhathi esidlule, angase abe nomuzwa wokuthi ukukutshela ngakho kuyisizathu esilahlekile.
Ngakho-ke, ubhalela izintombi zakhe, akhiphele ku-BFF wakhe ucingo, noma ahlanganyele usizi lwakhe nozakwabo oseduze ngesikhathi sekhefu. Izikhathi eziningi, okwenza intombazane iphelelwe isithakazelo kumfana wukunganakwa kwakhe okusobala. Uzokhathala ecela ukunakwa ebudlelwaneni ngesinye isikhathi. Uma lokho kwenzeka, wena - umlingani wakhe wempilo - ungase ukhishwe kwezinye zezinto ezibalulekile ezenzeka ekuphileni kwakhe kwansuku zonke. Ngenxa yalokho, ukuxhumana okungokomzwelo osekubuthakathaka kakade kuzoshiywa kulenga ngomucu.
Njengoba konke okuhlangenwe nakho, okukhulu noma okuncane, kusibumba ngandlela thize, ukungakwazi ukwabelana ngakho yikho okubangela ukuba ozakwethu bahlukane futhi babe “abantu abahluke kakhulu”. Yonke into encane angabelani ngayo ikwehlukanisa kancane kancane. Lezi zinto ezincane ekugcineni zinezela emzweni othi “umkami akabonisi isithakazelo kimi”. Leli ifulegi elibomvu eligqamile ukuthi akukhona konke okuhle emshadweni wakho.
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5. Ukuthula kuyabusa phezu kobudlelwano benu
Bonke ubudlelwano budlula ezikhathini zabo ze-monotony nesithukuthezi. Uma nindawonye isikhathi eside, kuzoba nezinsuku lapho wena nophathina wakho nivele nithule nje nithule noma nithole ukunethezeka ngokuthula kunamagama, kuye ngokuthi ubudlelwano benu bubukeka kanjani.
Kodwa-ke, inqobo nje uma bobabili abalingani besatshale imali ebudlelwaneni, bathola indlela yokubuyela emuva kulezi ziphonso zokuthula noma izigaba lapho uphelelwa khona izinto ongazisho komunye nomunye. U-Adena, ongasazizwa egxilile emshadweni noma kumyeni wakhe, uthi lapho owesifazane ephelelwa isithakazelo kowesilisa lokhu kuthula nokuzwana kuba yinto evamile.
“Sekunesikhathi sibhekene nesimo esinzima futhi sanquma ukufuna ukwelashwa kombhangqwana. Umelaphi wethu uphakamise ukuthi sibuyise izinsuku zezinsuku zeviki ukuze sixhume kabusha. UMarcus, umyeni wami, ubelokhu enza umzamo wangempela ekuhleleni lezi zinsuku. Nokho, angikazizwa okwamanje. Kuvele kube sengathi angisenandaba nalutho, maqondana nomshado wami.
"Engxenyeni enkulu, sihlala esidlweni sakusihlwa sithule. Uma ebuza okuthile, ngiyamphendula. Kodwa yilokho. Ngifuna ukwenza umzamo futhi ngiphindisele kodwa ngandlela thize ngeke ngikwazi ukuziletha kukho. Besilokhu siphila ukuphila kwethu njengabantu ngabanye hhayi njengombhangqwana cishe iminyaka eyishumi manje. Angazi kanjani - noma ukuzwa isidingo sokuphinda ngixhumane naye manje," usho kanje.
6. Angisafuni umyeni wami angithinte
“Angisafuni umyeni wami angithinte.” “Angisenaso isifiso ngomyeni wami.” Lo muzwa uwuphawu olucacile lokuthi owesifazane uphelelwa isithakazelo ebudlelwaneni kanye nomlingani wakhe. Lokhu kungenzeka ngenxa yezizathu ezingokomzwelo noma zomzimba, kodwa uma sekwenze ukusondelana kwakho kuthatha igalelo elikhulu. Futhi ungase ushiywe ubhekana nokuqaphela okungajabulisi: “Umkami akanasithakazelo kimi ngokobulili.”
UShaun waphendukela kudokotela wezocansi ukuze athole usizo ngemuva kweminyaka emibili esemshadweni ongenabo ubulili. Ngokuphikelela kwesazi ngocansi, sacela umkakhe ukuba naye ahlanganyele. Ngaleso sikhathi wayesesikhathini sokuya esikhathini futhi wayenenkinga yokubhekana nezinguquko emzimbeni wakhe. Kodwa lezi zimbangela ezingokomzimba kwakungezona kuphela izizathu zakhe ukuntula intshisekelo ebudlelwaneni bocansi.
"Angisenaso isifiso ngomyeni wami ngoba kubonakala sengathi akayazi indlela yakhe yokushintsha umzimba wami. Ukugcotshwa kwemvelo kunzima kimi okwamanje, futhi kufanele sibeke imali eningi ekuboniseni kusengaphambili noma sicabange ngaphandle kwebhokisi futhi silethe amathuluzi afanele namathoyizi ukudlala. Nokho, ubonakala engenasithakazelo nhlobo kukho konke. Ngokwezinga elithile, lapho nginomuzwa wokuthi akanandaba nokuthi ngibhekana kanjani nokucindezeleka kuphela," isazi socansi.
Nakuba lokho kwamnyakazisa u-Shaun futhi bebelokhu belandela amathiphu anconywe ochwepheshe ukuze alulame kulokhu kuphazamiseka, akuzona zonke izithandani ezithola indlela yokukuzungeza. Ezimweni eziningi, owesifazane uqala ukuzonda abalingani babo ngokubahlukumeza ngocansi, futhi indoda, nayo, iqala ukucasuka ukuthi umkakhe ulahlekelwe yisithakazelo sokusondelana.
7. Akasadlali
Lapho owesifazane elahlekelwa isithakazelo kumyeni wakhe, ngokwemvelo uyahoxa futhi ahluke izinhlobo zokusondelana ebudlelwaneni thatha hit. Enye yezinkomba ezijwayelekile zalokhu yilapho eyeka ukubonisa ubuntu bakhe obufana nobungane kuwe. Kungenzeka ukuthi kwakunesikhathi emshadweni wakho - mhlawumbe ezinsukwini zakuqala - lapho edlala ngawe, amahlaya, futhi ngokuvamile, abe umthombo wamandla.
Nokho, konke lokho sekwedlule manje. Ukusebenzisana kwakhe nawe kuya ngokuya kuba indaba yeqiniso futhi kuya ephuzwini. Ukhuluma kuphela uma kukhona okumele kuxoxwe ngakho, futhi akushiye kumadivayisi akho ngenye indlela. Ngeke kusaba nokukuhlupha ngenkathi usasebenza ngephrezentheshini ebalulekile noma ukukubhaxabula ngobudlabha njengoba niphambana ephasishi. Lolu shintsho lubonisa ukuthi ulahlekelwa imizwa ebudlelwaneni futhi ukuxhumana ngokomzwelo phakathi kwenu nobabili kulenga ngochungechunge.
UKevin, osebenza ebhange oseneminyaka eyisishiyagalombili eshadile, uthi: “Ngaqaphela ukuthi umkami akabonisi sithakazelo kimi lapho ngingasakhumbuli ukuthi sigcina nini ukuhleka. wena?”
8. Akanalo uthando
Izenzo zothando ezinjengokuqabula, ukwanga, ukubamba izandla, noma ukugona konke kubalulekile ekuhlakuleleni nasekugcineni ukusondelana ngokomzimba kunoma ibuphi ubuhlobo. Eqinisweni, zibaluleke kakhulu ukwedlula noma iziphi izenzo ezinhle zothando ngezikhathi ezithile. Lapho owesifazane ephelelwa isithakazelo kowesilisa, lezi zibonakaliso zothando ziba zingekho. Hhayi kuphela akaqali ukuthintana ngokomzimba kodwa futhi shies away lapho wenza.
Umzimba wakhe uthumela uphawu olucacile: Angisafuni umyeni wami angithinte. Futhi lokhu kuntuleka kokusondelana ngokomzimba kunganisahlukanisa kabili. Ukuntula uthando nokusondelana ngokomzimba kuphakathi kwezimpawu ezicacile zokuthi owesifazane akasenandaba nomyeni wakhe. Isizathu ngemuva kwayo singahluka.
Mhlawumbe, usephelelwe uthando. Angaba sebudlelwaneni kodwa ecabanga ngomunye umuntu. Noma ukunethezeka ebudlelwaneni benu sekumphethe kabi futhi uyaqiniseka ukuthi asikho isidingo sokuzama. Okubi nakakhulu, ukushukuma kwakhe kothando kuye kwahlangatshezwana nempendulo ebandayo, ebonisa ukunganaki esikhathini esidlule, okumbangele ukuba aqinise.
9. Akasaphumi endleleni yakhe
“Kwakunesikhathi lapho ngangiye ngenze okungaphezu kwalokho kumyeni wami. Ukuze nje ngibeke ukumamatheka ebusweni bakhe noma ngiqiniseke ukuthi unakho akudingayo. Ngisho noma kwakusho ukusebenzisa imali engangiyigcinele uhambo lwamantombazane ukuze ngimhlelele usuku oluhle lokuzalwa lapho ebhekene nesigaba esiphansi ngemva kokushonelwa unina. Noma ukusetha ama-alamu azomenzela ikhofi njalo ngemva kwamahora ambalwa lapho esebenza ezethulweni ezibalulekile zomsebenzi ebusuku.
“Lapho indodakazi yethu izalwa futhi ngihamba nemijikelezo yokuphakela nokushintsha ebusuku ngingedwa, ngabona ukuthi ubudlelwano bohlangothi olulodwa, nami ngigobile ukuze ngijabulise umyeni wami futhi angishiye ngizibambele mathupha. Kwaba sengathi iswishi ngaphakathi kimi sesiphenyisiwe, futhi kanjalo ngaphelelwa isithakazelo. Ngesinye isikhathi wasikisela ukuthi ngithenge enye indlu endaweni yesikole esingcono futhi wafuna ngingene kuyo. Ngenqaba ngoba kwakungeyona into engangiyifuna,” kusho u-Amanda.
Ukuqaphela ukuthi “umkami akabonisi isithakazelo kimi” kuba namandla kakhulu lapho eyeka ukwenza okungaphezulu nangaphezulu ukuze afeze izifiso zakho noma agcwalise izimfuno nezifiso zakho. Futhi ngokuzumayo, uqala ukubona ukubaluleka kwazo zonke izinto akwenzele zona ngaso sonke isikhathi futhi wazithatha kalula.
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10. Ukubona njengomngane
Esinye sezibonakaliso ezitshela kakhulu umkakho ukuthi uphelelwa isithakazelo kuwe ukuthi indlela akubuka ngayo futhi akuphathe ngayo iyashintsha, kusukela kothando kuya ku-platonic. Yebo, lapho owesifazane ephelelwa isithakazelo kumyeni wakhe, usuka ekubeni othandweni naye avele amthande. Kuyo yonke le minyaka emnandi ngemva kwenu nempilo enakhile ndawonye, angase akukhathalele kakhulu. Ngikuthanda ngokujulile ngisho. Kodwa kungenzeka ukuthi akasakuthandi.
Yebo, inhliziyo yakho igxumagxuma noma ukuthola ama-knickers akho e-twist njalo lapho ubona umlingani wakho kuyinto engenakwenzeka uma kade nishadile. Yini ebeka a umshado ojabulisayo ngaphandle kwalezo ezingajabulisi ukuthi phambilini lowo muzwa awupheli ngokuphelele. Bobabili abalingani basafisa futhi bayalangazelela omunye nomunye. Ngisho noma izikhathi eziningi abazenza ngazo lezi zifiso zingehla, imizwa ikhula ngokuhamba kwesikhathi.
Ngakolunye uhlangothi, lapho owesifazane elahlekelwa isithakazelo, isifiso sakhe ngomlingani wakhe singowokuqala ukuthatha hit. Njengoba engasagxilile kuwe ngokomzwelo, angase angazizwa ekhangwa noma avukwe inkanuko yobulili ngawe. Umshado wakho uphenduka isibopho esingaphezulu kwe-platonic. Osekusele wukuthi ubhekane neqiniso: “Umkami akanamizwa ngami”.
11. Wenza wonke umzamo
Lapho owesifazane ephelelwa isithakazelo kumyeni wakhe, amatafula aphenduka ngempela. Uma uzizwa ukuthi wena ubudlelwano bufanele ukulondolozwa futhi usafuna ukuyenza isebenze, ungazithola usuwenza wonke umsebenzi ukuyigcina intanta. Kusukela ekuzameni ukwenza ingxoxo ukuya ekuhleleni ubusuku bezinsuku kanye nokuphumula okungalindelekile ukuze nichithe isikhathi esiseqophelweni eliphezulu ndawonye, kufanele uthathe ijoka lokummema ebudlelwaneni futhi.
Yena, yena, angase adlale noma angadlali, kuye ngokuthi ukude kangakanani. Kodwa uma ukholelwa ekusaseni okwabiwe naye, ungamvumeli ukuntula kwakhe isithakazelo noma ukuthatha isinyathelo kukudikibalise ekwenzeni umzamo. Kwazi bani, uma ekubona uzama, angavele anqume ukuhlangana nawe phakathi.
Okufanele Ukwenze Uma Umkakho Ephelelwa Isithakazelo Kuwe
Izimpawu ukuthi umkakho uphelelwa isithakazelo kuwe noma usephumile emshadweni ngokomzwelo zingaphazamisa, ukusho okungenani, kodwa asikho isidingo sokuthi uyeke ukudalelwa okwamanje. Sebenzisa ukuqonda kwakho ukuthi kungani umfazi engasenasithakazelo kumyeni wakhe futhi uhlole ukuthi yiziphi izici zobuhlobo benu okungenzeka ziye zabangela ukuba agcine esehlukana. Bese, yenza umzamo wokulungisa lezo zinkinga ezihluphayo futhi ugweme izinto amadoda azenzayo ezenza abantu besifazane balahlekelwe isithakazelo ukuze azizwe eqiniseka ukuthi ukumnika u-100% ebudlelwaneni kuyamzuzisa.
Kuze kube yilapho efika kulelo qophelo lapho ukholo lwakhe ebudlelwaneni lubuyiselwa khona, nazi ezinye izinto ongazenza ukuze uthuthukise ikhwalithi yesibopho sakho somshado:
- Kwenze kube yinto ehamba phambili ukuchitha isikhathi, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi ukude futhi ehoxile ubonakala kanjani
- Menze azizwe ejabule ngaye nangobudlelwano ngokuthinta ngokuthinta inhliziyo njengokuhlela ubusuku bezinsuku, ukuthola ushokoledi awuthandayo, noma kalula, ukwabelana ngomthwalo
- Mkhuthaze ukuthi akhulume ngemizwa yakhe, kodwa ungamkhathazi ukuthi avule isifuba uma engazizwa ekulungele
- Bheka izinto eningahlanganyela kuzo ndawonye noma niphinde nivakashele izinto enajabulela ukuzenza ndawonye ngezikhathi ezimnandi zomshado wenu
- Menze azi ukuthi uzimisele kuye, uzibophezele ekwenzeni umshado uphumelele
Izikhombi Ezibalulekile
- Ukunganakwa okungokomzwelo isikhathi eside noma ukunganaki izidingo zakhe, akufunayo, nezifiso kungase kubangele ukuba owesifazane aphelelwe isithakazelo kumlingani wakhe.
- Lapho lokho kwenzeka, angase aphenduke igobolondo angabe esaqhubeka nomzamo wokukhulisa umshado
- Ukuncipha komdlandla wokuya ocansini, ukuntula umzamo, ukuncipha kokukhulumisana, ukungatholakali ngokomzwelo ngezinye zezimpawu zokuthi owesifazane akasatshaliwe ebudlelwaneni.
- Lokhu kungaletha ubudlelwano bakho esimweni esibucayi. Uma ufuna ukusindisa umshado wakho, umzamo ongaguquki noqotho wokuphinde uxhumane naye ukuphela kwendlela eya phambili
Akulula ukuhlala emshadweni lapho umngane womshado eseboboke ngokuphelele. Kodwa-ke, yilapho futhi ukuzwela nozwela kuba okubaluleke kakhulu kunangaphambili. Uma uwazisa umshado wakho, qhubeka uzama ukudlula kumkakho. Ungase uthole ukuphumelela kokumenza aphinde atshale emshadweni. Uma udinga usizo lokuthola izimpendulo zemibuzo efana nokuthi ungaphinda uhehe kanjani ebudlelwaneni noma ukuthi ungazuza kanjani intshisekelo nothando lomkakho futhi, abeluleki abanamakhono nabanelayisensi Iphaneli yeBonobology zilapha kuwe.
Le ndatshana ibuyekezwe ngoJuni 2023
Imibuzo Evame Ukubuzwa
Owesifazane angase alahlekelwe isithakazelo kumyeni wakhe ngenxa yezizathu ezihlukahlukene, nokho, umnyombo wawo kuwukuwohloka kokuxhumana okungokomzwelo. Mhlawumbe, akazizwa ethandwa, engathandwa futhi ehlonishwa umlingani wakhe. Noma mhlawumbe ukhathele ukuba yedwa owenza umzamo ebudlelwaneni. Zonke lezi zici zingaphazamisa ukusondelana ngokomzwelo abelana ngakho nomyeni wakhe futhi agcine engasenandaba nayo.
Akunjalo. Uma ukholelwa ebudlelwaneni bakho futhi unokholo lokuthi isibopho sakho singasindiswa, ungenza umzamo wokumbuyisela futhi umenze athandane nawe futhi. Kodwa-ke, lokhu kuzodinga ukuthi wenze imizamo ebalulekile nengaguquki yokumqinisekisa ukuthi ukumnika u-100% ebudlelwaneni kumfanele ngenkathi
Umshado uwuhambo olude, futhi ekuhambeni kwawo, imibhangqwana ivame ukubhekana nezikhathi ezinhle nezinhle, okungadala ukunqanyulwa kobudlelwano. Ngakho-ke, yebo, akuvamile ukuba abesifazane balahlekelwe isithakazelo kubayeni babo noma ngokuphambene nalokho. Sesikushilo lokho, omunye umlingani uphelelwa isithakazelo komunye akusho ukuthi ubuhlobo buyophela. Ngomzamo, bobabili abalingani bangathola indlela yabo yokubuyela komunye nomunye.
Ayihambisani Nomfazi Wami Futhi Ngiphendukela Ekwelulekweni Ukuze Ngisindise Umshado
Umnikelo wakho awuhlanganisi inhlangano esiza abantulayo umnikelo. Izovumela i-Bonobology ukuthi iqhubeke nokukulethela ulwazi olusha nolwakamuva emzamweni wethu wokusiza noma ubani emhlabeni ukuthi afunde ukwenza noma yini.
