Me pēhea te whakatau i tētahi e whakapae ana i a koe mō ngā mea katoa — 21 Ngā Huarahi Whaitake

Kua whakapaetia koe e tō hoa rangatira mō ngā mea katoa i ēnei rā? I roto i te hononga whanaungatanga, he mea whakangaro te whakapae tonu. Ka ngoikore te whakawhirinaki, ka kai i te aroha, ā, i te mutunga ka memeha ngā hononga aroha. Ko te noho hei kaiwhiwhi o te whakapae tonu pēnei i:

• "E kore ahau e riri nui, mēnā ko koe..."
• “Ko koe tonu…”
• "Kāore rawa koe..."

he mea e mārama ana te whakarihariha. Nō reira, me aha koe mēnā ka kitea koe kei te whakapaehia mō ngā mea katoa o te whanaungatanga? I tahuri mātou ki te tohunga hinengaro Jayant Sundaresan (Tohu Paerua i roto i te Hinengaro Āwhina), he tohunga ki te tuku tohutohu mō ngā momo take whanaungatanga, pērā i te pakaru o te whakawhitiwhiti kōrero, te whakahaere i ngā tumanakohanga, te puremu, te wehenga, me te whakarere, kia mārama ai me pēhea te whakatau i te tangata e whakapae ana i a koe mō ngā mea katoa.

Nō hea te pūtake o te whakapae?

I mua i te ngana ki te whakatau i te whakapae, he mea nui kia mārama ki tōna pūtake. E ai ki a Jayant, ko te whakapae i ahu mai i te riri kāore i whakapuakina e pupuhi ana i roto. E kōrero ana ia ki a tātou ngā take noa mō te whakaaro whakapae:

• He maha ngā wā, he mauahara
• Tērā pea nā tetahi mea i mahia e te tangata e whakapaetia ana, i kore rānei i mahia e ia
• He maha ngā mea e pōuri ana rātou, engari kāore anō kia kōrerotia whānuitia e rātou
• Tērā pea kāore he harikoa, he ngākau māhaki rānei ki te ao
• Tērā pea ka raru te mahi
• Tērā pea he raruraru kei roto i te whanaungatanga 
• Tērā pea ka tohu i ngā atarangi o te tuakiri whakapehapeha

He aha te ingoa o te whakapae i tētahi atu mō ō raruraru?

Ko te whakapae i tētahi atu mō ō raruraru ka kiia ko te whakatakoto whakaaro. "He whakaaro pango, mā rānei: E whakapono ana tō hoa whakapae ko koe anake te take o tō rātou rā kino. Engari tera pea he kore moe noa iho rātou, he nui rawa rānei ā rātou mahi. Kua tautohetohe pea rātou ki tētahi mātua. Kua titiro pea rātou ki te whakaata, ā, kua kite kua koroheke rātou, kua kore rānei i te pai te āhua," te kī a te tohunga hinengaro, a Tākuta Aman Bhonsle.

Engari i te korenga e aro ki ngā mea, kua riro i a rātou pōuri me te riri kāore rānei i nui te whakapae ki a koe, te hoa rangatira i waiho i ō rātou tōkena ki te papa o te rūma noho. "Ko ngā tōkena he kakau witi noa iho i whati ai te tuara o te kamera," tana kī.

He tikanga tēnei i te nuinga o te wā, tāna tāpiri. Ā, tera pea he mea i riro mai i a rātou i ngā taiao o mua, e ai ki te tohunga hinengaro a Manjari Saboo.

 Te pānui e pā ana: 8 Ngā Huarahi e Pāngia ai te Hononga e te Whakawhiti Whakahē

21 Ngā Huarahi Whaitake hei Whakatau i te Tangata e Whakahē Ana i a Koe mō Ngā Mea Katoa

He rite ngā tikanga me ngā tauira whakaaro tawhito ki ngā hāte wera whakamarie, ki ngā tarau tarau kua tawhito. Kāore pea i te ātaahua, engari he mea mōhio, e ai ki te kaituhi a Tākuta Brené Brown. Nō reira, ina nui ake te mamae, te riri, te uaua rānei i te mea noa, he tino māmā ake te toro atu ki ēnei tikanga, i tēnei wā rānei, te kimi i tētahi hei whakapae.

Engari he mea whakapouri te whakapae i a koe mō ngā mea katoa o te whanaungatanga. Kua tohua he whakaaro kino ki a koe, ā, ko te tikanga kei te kī atu tō hoa ki a koe Ko koe te raruraru o te whanaungatanga. Nā, he aha te rongoā? Anei ētahi tohutohu whai hua mō te whakatau i tētahi e whakapae ana i a koe mō ngā mea katoa:

1. Ātete i te hiahia ki te whawhai anō

Nā, me pēhea tāu whakautu ki tētahi e whakapae tonu ana i a koe? E ai ki a Jayant, e toru ngā mahanga e taka ai te tangata ina tūtaki tonu ki te whakapae: 

• Ka pahū rātou i te riri
• Kia pukumahi, kia pukuriri 
• Me parai rānei ngā mea i raro i te whāriki

Kāore tetahi o ēnei e tino whai hua ana. E ai ki ētahi tohunga hinengaro tokotoru i roto i tā mātou rōpū:

• "He pai ake kia kaua e tauhohe wawe tonu, nā te mea ka whakatupu noa i te pakanga." – Juhi Pandey
• "Kaua e tohu i te whanonga whakapae a tō hoa i mua i ngā hoa, i ngā hoa noho tata, i ngā whanaunga rānei." – Manjari
• "Mā te whawhai ki te whakapae me te whakapae, mā te riri rānei, ka mutu pea ka puta he raruraru hou." – Aman 

Nō reira, ahakoa he mea whakamātau pea te urupare pērā, me manawa hōhonu, ka hoki whakamuri. Kia maumahara ki ngā āhuatanga pai o tō hoa, kati te ngana ki te whakatau ko wai te tika, ko wai te hē, ā, tirohia mēnā ka taea e koe te urupare mai i te aroha.

2. Whakamahi i te whakawhitiwhiti kōrero tuwhera 

Ka kitea e taku tāne he hē i roto i aku mahi katoa. Ka whakapae taku hoa tāne i ahau mō āna whanonga. Mena kei te noho hei kaupapa matua tēnā i roto i tō kōrua whanaungatanga, me whakawhitiwhiti kōrero pea. 

"Ko te whakapae he tohu i te pakaru o te whakawhitiwhiti kōrero. Ina tuwhera, ina mārama, ina mārama hoki te whakawhitiwhiti kōrero, ka noho iti tonu ngā mea, ā, ka whakatauhia wawetia," te kī a Jayant. 

"Nō reira, kia mārama te whakaae me te manawanui, kia tuwhera tonu te kōrero," te kī a Juhi. Ko te tikanga hoki o tēnei me whakamōhio atu koe ki tō hoa kei te whakapaetia koe, inā koa mēnā kei te huri te kōrero hei tautohe me te mahi tohu-maihao.  

3. Tuhia ētahi tirohanga – tōu ake, me tō rātou ake

E rua ngā tohutohu a Juhi mō te mea hei kī atu ki te tangata e whakapae ana i a koe: 

• Whakaatuhia tō whakaaro
• Pātai atu ki a rātou, “He aha koe i whakaaro ai ko au anake te tangata e whai kawenga ana?” 

Ma tenei ka awhina i a koe ki te whakakore i te mooni o te ahuatanga, kia pai ake ranei te mohio ki te takenga mai o to hoa. 

"Titiro mai, ki te whakapae te tangata i te katoa mō ngā mea katoa, he rerekē te āhuatanga. Engari ki te whakapae tonu tō hoa i a koe anake, he tohu tēnei kei roto i te whanaungatanga te koretake. Tērā pea he rerekētanga i waenga i ō rāua tumanakohanga mō te whanaungatanga me te ao tūturu," te kī a Jayant. 

Tirohia mēnā me mahi e koe whakahaere i ō rātou tumanakohanga i roto i te whanaungatanga, mēnā rānei me whakapuaki koe i ōu ake whakaaro me te kaha ake, mēnā rānei me whakarite he whakaaetanga. Kāore ngā tāngata tokorua i roto i te whanaungatanga e mōhio ana ki ngā whakaaro o tētahi atu, nō reira me kōrero.

4. Tukua rātou kia puta te hau

Me pēhea tāu whakautu ki tētahi e whakapae ana i a koe? Ko te whakarongo matatau ki tā rātou e kōrero nei tētahi huarahi. I ētahi wā, ko te tawhiti poto rawa i waenganui i te tokorua ko te kōrero pono.

Mena kua whakatau koe ki te kōrero mō te take, ka tukuna e Jayant ētahi tohutohu: 

• Hoatu he wā me te wāhi ki tō hoa rangatira hei whakapuaki i ō whakaaro 
• Kaua e whakaroa i a rātou kia mutu rā anō  
• Kaua e tīmata ki te whakamahere i tāu whakautu
• Kaua e whakaaro ki tētahi whakahokinga mai, ki tētahi kōrero whakatoi rānei

"He wāhanga tēnei o te whanaungatanga pakeke. Ka ngaro ētahi wāhanga o tō hoa. Kia whakatikatikaina rā anō, kia ora rānei aua wāhanga, ka whakaatu mai rātou i ngā whanonga kāore koe e pai ki ai. Me kimi e koe he huarahi hei whakahaere i tēnā. Ā, e pā ana hoki ki a koe. Kāore koe i te mōhio," tana kī.

Te pānui e pā ana: 12 Ngā Mea Whakamamae Kaua rawa e Kōrerotia e Koe, e tō Hoa rānei, Ki A Koe Anō

5. Ki te whakapaetia koe mō ngā mea katoa o te whanaungatanga, tirohia ō roto

E ai ki a Aman, ina whakapae tetahi i a koe mō tōna riri, ina tautohetohe rānei ki a koe, ina whara rānei i a koe, ā, ka riri tonu rātou, me arotake wawe i roto i a koe. Ka tāpiri atu ia, "Tirohia mēnā he tika te kōrero a te tangata." 

Mā tēnei anō hoki koe e āwhina ki te mārama mēnā kei a koe te whakapae, mēnā me whakama koe, ā, mēnā me whakatika e koe ō hapa. Kia tūpato. I ētahi wā, ko te whakapae he ngana a te hoa ki te wareware i te kawenga mō ā rātou mahi, ki te wawahi i tō whakapono, ki te tohu rānei o te hoa whakahaere, ngā whakaaro o te kaiwhakamahi Quora Sharon Milner. 

"Ko tāku whakaaro kia aro atu tātou ki te raruraru, kia pātai atu hoki me pēhea tātou e whakatau ai. Mā tēnei, ka taea e rātou te whai kawenga mō te whakatau," tāna tāpiri.

6. Tāutuhia ngā mamae, ka ngana ki te whakatika

Anei tētahi atu tohutohu mō te whakatau i te tangata e whakapae ana i a koe mō ngā mea katoa: Ngāna kia kitea ko ēhea ngā āhuatanga, ngā mahi rānei e whakaoho ana i te whakapae, e ai ki tā Manjari. 

Ka tāpiri atu a Jayant ki tēnei, "Ka noho tonu ēnei kaupapa mōrearea ka ngawari te whakaohooho i tō hoa. Tērā pea mō te wehewehe i a kōrua." nga mahi o te whare "me pēhea rānei te whakatipu i āu tamariki. Ina mōhio koe ki te pūtake o te mamae, ngana ki te wehe atu, ka mahi i ngā mahi iti hei whakatika." 

Ko te mea nui i konei ko te whai i te pono o ō tumanakohanga. He roa te wā e hiahiatia ana hei whakaora i tētahi whanaungatanga. Kaua e tatari kia mutu te whakapae i te meneti tonu ka mahi koe i tētahi mea. 

7. Mātakihia te tauira

Kei te whakaaro koe he aha te mea hei kōrero ki tētahi e whakapae tonu ana i a koe? Tuatahi, tirohia ā rātou whanonga ina kaha rawa ngā kare ā-roto. Mā tēnei koe e āwhina ki te mārama ki ā rātou tauira me ā rātou au, ā, ka puta ake he whakautu tika.

"Tērā ētahi mea ka nui ake te riri o tō hoa, me ētahi mea ka whakamarie i a rātou. Me mōhio anō hoki koe ki ngā tūmomo whakawehi e whakamahia ana. I whakatūpato rātou engari kāore i te tino tika? Kāore rānei i te tino tika ngā tūmomo whakawehi i mahia e rātou?" te pātai a Jayant. 

"Kātahi ka hoki whakamuri, ka tirotiro i te āhuatanga. Me mahi ki te mārama ki te tauira e puta mai ana. He aha te mea e whakaoho ana i te whanonga? He rite tonu te ara e whai ana i te nuinga o te wā?" tāna tāpiri. 

8. Ngāna kia kite i tō tūranga i roto i te raruraru

"Kei muri i ia amuamu he hiahia hohonu whaiaro," e ai ki te kaituhi a Tākuta John M. Gottman. Nō reira, ina whara koe i a rātou, ā, ka riri rātou, ka whakapae rānei i ō rātou whanonga ki a koe, he tohu pea tēnei kei te hiahia tō hoa ki tētahi mea mai i a koe. Tērā pea kei te hara koe i tētahi, i ētahi mea iti rānei. 

I whai wāhi koe ki te raruraru i runga i te mōhio, i runga rānei i te kore mōhio? He wāhanga rānei kei reira hei kawenga māu? Me mahi. He tohutohu tā Jayant: 

• Kaua noa mihi mai 
• Whakamāramahia te mea i tupu
• Āwhina i a rātou kia mārama me pēhea e kore ai e tupu anō
• Whakahokia ō rātou mamae mā te mahi i tētahi mea e whakanuia ana e rātou

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9. Whiriwhiria te take me tō hoa mēnā kei te whakapaetia tonutia koe mō ngā mea katoa

Ina he nui te riri, ā, kei te pukuriri tetahi, kāore pea e taea te noho tahi me te kōrero whakaaro nui. "Nō reira, whiriwhiria he wā noho noa iho hei whakatata atu ki tō hoa rangatira, hei whiriwhiri tahi me ia," te kī a Juhi. Kei te whakaaro koe me pēhea te whiriwhiri tahi me tō hoa rangatira? E rua ngā whakaaro a Aman:

• Pātai atu ki a rātou he aha rātou i hiahia ai ki te kī tonu atu kei te ngaro tetahi mea i roto i a koe 
• Mea atu ki a rātou, ki te kōrero mai rātou i ngā mea i runga i te ngākau atawhai me te manawanui, ki te pātai mārire mai rātou ki a koe, tera pea ka hiahia koe ki te tirotiro i a rātou.

10. Tātarihia te kare ā-roto kei muri i te whakapae

Pānuihia te kōrero i waenganui i ngā rārangi, me te whakapae. Ina whara koe i a rātou, ā, ka riri rātou, ka huri rānei i tētahi tautohe ki a koe, nekehia tō arotahi mai i ngā kupu, ka ngana ki te mārama ki te mea e whakapuakina ana i roto i te kare ā-roto. Tērā pea ētahi hiahia aronganui tā rātou e ngana ana ki te whakapuaki i konei.

"Tērā pea he mea nui ake taua wāhanga i ngā kōrero me ngā meka. He aha ō rātou kare ā-roto? Kei te ngana pea rātou ki te whakapuaki i tēnei engari nā te mea he nui ō rātou kare ā-roto, kāore pea rātou e kitea ngā kupu tika, e kitea rānei te reo tika," te kī a Jayant. 

"Nō reira, arotahi ki ngā kare ā-roto o tō hoa. Me mahi tahi kōrua i tēnā i te tuatahi i mua i te whakaaro me pēhea kōrua i tae atu ai ki reira."

11. Tirohia mēnā kei te raru nui atu tō hoa i te mea noa

He maha ngā wā ka puta te whakapae i te kore e taea, te kore rānei e pai ki te whakatau i tētahi mea. Nō reira, ina whakapae tetahi i a koe mō tōna riri, ina tautohetohe rānei ki a koe, he tohu pea tēnei kei te pāngia rātou e te uauatanga, ā, me nui ake te tautoko e hiahiatia ana i te tikanga. 

Mena kei roto tō hoa i tētahi wā uaua, kāti:

• "Me tautoko pea koe i a rātou i te hinengaro, i te kare ā-roto, me te tinana hoki. Me whakarerekē pea koe i ētahi wā kia pai ai te hanga i tētahi hononga pai," te kī a Manjari
• "Me waiho pea ō mahere ki tahaki, ā, me noho tahi me rātou. Mā te mahi i tēnei, ko te whakaaro ka whakaaturia e koe he 'tātou' – he rōpū. Kāore e taea te whakaatu i tēnei mā te kī, engari mā te mahi," te kī a Jayant.

12. Mahi tahi hei rōpū ki te kimi i tētahi otinga 

Anei tētahi atu tohutohu mō te whakatau i tētahi e whakapae ana i a koe mō ngā mea katoa. Ngāna kia nekehia te arotahi ki tētahi hinengaro hauora ake, ki tētahi hinengaro mahi tahi ake. Mā tēnei, ki te mea he raruraru tūturu, ka taea e kōrua te kimi i tētahi otinga ka taea e kōrua te noho tahi.  

E ai ki a Aman, ko te wero he tango i ngā whakaaro, he tirotiro i ngā meka, ā, he whakatau tahi: 

• He aha tāu e hiahia ana ki te mahi ki ngā meka? 
• Kei te hiahia noa koe ki te noho i runga i ngā meka? 
• Heoi anō, kei te hiahia koe ki te mahi i tētahi huarahi e whai hua ai, e whakaora ai hoki i te whanaungatanga?

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13. Ngāna kia kitea he huarahi whakaute hei whai wāhi atu 

Ina mahi tetahi i tetahi mea kāore tātou e pai ki a ia, kāore tātou e whakaaro he āhuatanga kino tērā. Nō reira, ina hoki mai tō hoa whakapae ki te kāinga, ā, ka maringi ngā rihi i te totohu o te kīhini, he māmā ake ki a rātou te whakaaro kāore i te nui āu mahi, kaua ki te whakaaro he pukumahi rawa tō rā. Ā, ka uru atu hoki tēnei ki roto i te kōrero. 

Nō reira, te kimi huarahi pai ake hei whakauru atu, hei ngā huarahi hei whawhai mā te whakaute "Tērā pea tētahi o ngā whakautu mō te whakatau i tētahi e whakapae ana i a koe mō ngā mea katoa. "I te tīmatanga, kia whakaute, kia atawhai hoki i a koe e tuku urupare ana ki a rātou. He aha ai me huri hei whakamātautau kino?" te kī a Aman.

14. Whakanohoia tō whanaungatanga ki runga ake i ngā mea katoa

Hei te mutunga iho, ko te mea nui ko te nui o te whakaute o kōrua ki tō kōrua whanaungatanga. Nā te mea ki te pērā kōrua, ka hiahia kōrua ki te wareware ki ō rāua whanonga, ki te tuku i ētahi mea, ā, ki te mahi i ngā mea e tika ana kia arohia.

15. Rapua he āwhina ngaio mēnā kei te whakapaetia tonu koe mō ngā mea katoa o te whanaungatanga

Ko tētahi atu tohutohu mō te whakatau i tētahi e whakapae ana i a koe mō ngā mea katoa ko te kawe mai i tētahi kaiāwhina. "He mema o te whānau, he hoa, he kaiwhakaora hinengaro rānei mō te tokorua. He tangata whai whakaaro, ā, ka taea e ia te kawe mai i te ako nui ake ki te āhuatanga," te kī a Aman. 

E whakaae ana a Jayant. "Me rapu āwhina ngaio pea koe ki te hanga whanaungatanga pakeke kia taea ai e kōrua te whakapuaki i ō kōrua kare ā-roto, ahakoa he pai, he kino rānei, i runga i te whakaute me te whai hua, kaua e ngaro te mana whakahaere."

Ki te mea kei te rapu āwhina koe, ngā kaitohutohu i te pā o Bonobologynel he paato noa atu.

16. Whakatakotoria ētahi rohe

Ka kitea e taku tāne he hē i roto i aku mahi katoa. Ka whakapae tonu taku hoa tāne i ahau mō āna whanonga — Mena kei te noho hei tauira te whakapae, me whakatakoto pea e koe ētahi rohe aronganui"I ētahi wā, me neke atu pea koe ka kōrero ā muri ake nei," te kī a Juhi. 

Anei ngā mea ka taea e koe te kī atu ki tētahi hoa e whakapae ana i a koe mō ngā mea katoa:

• E mōhio ana ahau kei te pouri koe i tēnei wā, nō reira me kōrero tāua mō te āhua o te raruraru kia taea ai e au te āwhina?
• E hiahia ana ahau ki te kōrero i tēnei mea, nō reira me whai wā tāua ki te whakamatao i a tāua anō, kātahi ka kōrero anō mō ​​tēnei i muri mai? 
• Kāore e taea e au te kōrero i tēnei mena ka whakapae tonu koe i ahau

17. I ētahi wā me haere atu koe

Kua mōhio koe i nāianei me pēhea te whakatau i tētahi tāne e whakapae ana i tāna wahine mō ngā mea katoa, i tētahi atu rānei. Engari anei tētahi mea kaua e aro atu ki tēnei: ​​te whakapae kino. Haere atu ina tīmata te kino o ngā mea.

"Ina huri te whakapae hei rapu utu, ka tīmata te tangata ki te kōrero i ngā mea kino, ki te ngana rānei ki te whiu, ki te takaro rānei ngā kēmu hinengaro me tētahi"," te whakatūpato a Aman. 

"Ki te whakapaetia koe mō ngā āhuatanga katoa o te whanaungatanga, ā, he uaua ki a koe te whakamanawanui, kāore rānei he mea e whakatauhia ana, he pai ake te wehe atu i te whanaungatanga, nā te mea ka pā kino ki a koe me tō ngākau," te kī a Juhi.  

 Te pānui e pā ana: Āhea koe me wehe atu i tētahi whanaungatanga? 11 ngā tohu e tohu ana kua tae ki te wā

18. Kaua e tangohia e koe

He aha ahau i te nuinga o te wā e whakapaetia ana i roto i te whanaungatanga? Mena koinei tāu e whakaaro ana, puritia te whakaaro. "He tokoiti noa iho ngā tāngata e whakaae ana he hē rātou, ahakoa he mārama noa iho. Ko ētahi e kore rawa e whakaae he hē rātou, ko ētahi e ngana ana ki te whakatika i ō rātou hē mā roto i ngā mahi a ētahi atu. Kāore au e tino aro ki tēnei," te kī a tētahi kaiwhakamahi Quora. George Hatcher. 

Ahakoa te kī a tō hoa he hē koe, ehara i te mea ko koe te hē. He maha ngā wā, ko ngā kōrero a te tangata he mea nui ki a rātou. Nō reira, ngana ki te wareware i te hē, me te whai whakaaro ki te take e kōrero ai tō hoa i āna kōrero me te hinengaro tuwhera.   

19. Kaua e amohia te mamae

Ina whara koe i tētahi engari ka whakapae anō i a koe, ina ngā kupu mamae a tō hoa rangatira"Kaua e kohia te mamae, engari puritia, mirimiri ki roto i tō ngākau, awhiawhi ki a ia, me te kawe haere mō te wā roa," te tohutohu a Brené. "Me kite koe, me takahi atu rānei, me huri haere rānei, me haere tonu," tāna tāpiri.

Ki te mau tonu te mamae i a koe, ina koa kua whakatauhia te raruraru, ka whakatupu te riri me te kawa ki tō hoa. Heoi, ki te mea ko te mamae anake kei a koe, kua tae ki te wā ki te arotake anō mēnā e hiahia ana koe ki tēnei whanaungatanga, kāore rānei.

20. Kia mataara ki tō kaikōrero pakiwaitara o roto

Ina whakapae tetahi i a koe mō tō rātou riri, ina whara rānei tetahi i a koe engari ka whakapae anō i a koe, he mea nui kia tūpato ki tō urupare. He maha ngā wā, ko ngā kōrero e kōrerotia ana e tātou ki a tātou anō mō ​​ngā āhuatanga me ngā kōrero e hangaia ana e tātou hei tautoko i aua āhuatanga, koia te mea e kukume ana i a tātou ki raro. 

Nō reira, puritia tō kōrero, hono atu ki tō pono, ā, ora i taua kōrero. Kaua e tukua te whakapae kia whakapōrearea i te tuhinga.

21. Tū atu mōu ake

He aha ahau i whakapaetia ai i roto i te whanaungatanga? Mena he pātai tēnā e puta ake ana i ngā wā katoa, kua tae ki te wā ki te whakaaroaro: Kua waiho e koe koe kia tūwhera ki te whakapae?  

I ētahi wā, ka tino ngohengohe tetahi o ngā hoa i te tīmatanga, nō reira ka maia pea tetahi ki te tuku i tana mana ki runga i a rātou anō, e ai ki a Aman. "Ki te whakapae te tangata i a koe, ā, ka mau tonu koe ki te whakapae, ka taunga rātou ki te mahi i a koe me te mea he pēke patu tangata. Ā tōna wā, ka mutu pea koe." haere i roto i te pouri "he porowhita whanonga kino rānei," tāna tāpiri.

"I mua, i tukua e au kia tukinotia ahau nā te wehi o ngā tautohetohe ... E mōhio ana ahau he whakamataku engari me kī atu ahau ki a koe ko te ako ki te tū atu mōu ake tētahi o ngā mea tino whakawātea me te hanga whakapono ka taea e koe te mahi," te kī a te kaiwhakamahi Quora. Bonnie Lyons.

Ko te tū atu ki a koe anō ehara i te mea ko te tū atu ki tō hoa rangatira anake. Ko te mahi i te kawenga, ki tō hoa rangatira, ki a koe anō hoki. Ko te pono ki a koe anō, kaua e huna i ngā mea kino, e huna rānei i ngā pono whakararuraru o te whanaungatanga.

Ki te waiho noa iho, ka taea e te whakapae te pana i te whakawhirinaki, te whakapono, me te nuinga o ngā wāhanga pai katoa o te whanaungatanga, ka hinga, pērā i te puranga poraka Jenga. Nō reira, kimihia he huarahi hei whakatau i te tangata e whakapae ana i a koe mō ngā mea katoa. Kaua e tukua te whakapae kia pirau, kia pakaru ai te mea kua hanga e koe.

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