12 Ngā Tohu e Huri Ana Te Hononga Ki Te Aroha

He kohu moepuku, he aroha tūturu rānei? Kei te tino kaha te moepuku? – He maha tonu āu pātai ki a koe anō? Āe, ki te pērā koe, kua whiti pea koe i te wāhanga moepuku, ā, kua neke atu ki te aroha. Ko te puta ake o tēnei whakaaro ki roto i tō hinengaro tētahi o ngā tohu e huri ana te moepuku hei aroha. Ahakoa he onge, ka aroha te tangata ki ā rātou hoa moepuku, ā, ka noho tahi rāua.

He rite te ahua o ngā hononga aroha ki te aroha? Ae, ka taea. Ko ngā hononga kare ā-roto, ngā hononga moepuku rānei ka tīmata noa iho, kāore he whakaaro kia neke atu ki tētahi atu mea. Heoi, he rārangi angiangi rawa. I te mutunga, ka huri te takaro me te kukume tinana ki te tino kare ā-roto, ā, koinei te wā ka tīmata ai te raruraru. Ahakoa te āhua kino i te tīmatanga, ka taea e ēnei hononga te whakararu i te marena e whakaarohia ana te pono me te pono he mea tino nui.

Ahakoa he huarahi mawhiti te tangata ki tēnei mahi, tera pea ka huri te moe tāne ki te hononga kare ā-roto hohonu, ki te aroha rānei. He tino uaua ki te mārama ina whiti taua rārangi, koia mātou i konei hei āwhina i a koe ki te mārama me te ine i ngā tohu e huri ana te moe tāne ki te aroha.

Me pēhea koe e mōhio ai kei te huri te whanaungatanga hei aroha pono?

Nā te aha koe i mōhio ai he aroha, ehara i te hiahia nui Nōnahea i tupu tuatahi ai? Ko ngā tohu kei te tino kaha te whanaungatanga he rite tonu ngā kare ā-roto me te paku hurihanga. I tō aroha i a koe e taiohi ana, i pāngia koe e ngā kare ā-roto mahana me te pōuriuri, me te mea kei te pēpeke te puku, e whakaaro ana ki taua tangata i te ao me te pō, e hiahia ana kia kite i a rātou, kia kōrero ki a rātou, ā, e ngoikore ana ō kare ā-roto ki a rātou.

Waihoki, ka mōhio koe kua whanakehia e koe ngā kare ā-roto kaha mō tētahi hoa moepuku i roto i te huarahi pakeke ake. I te nuinga o te wā, ka tīmata aunoa te whakataurite i waenga i tō hoa rangatira me tō hoa moepuku, ā, ka uaua ake te whakatau mēnā he kohu moepuku, he aroha tūturu rānei. Ka pupuri koe i tētahi rārangi arowhai hinengaro mēnā ka taea e tēnei tangata te whakaea i ngā mea katoa e ngaro ana i tō hoa rangatira. Engari ki te mea koia te mea pono, ka neke atu koe i taua wā o te tatau i ngā painga me ngā huakore, ā, ka hiahia koe ki tēnei tangata i roto i te katoa.

I roto rawa i tōu ngākau ka mōhio koe he takahi tēnei i te whakawhirinaki o tō hoa rangatira, ā, he hē tāu mahi. Kātahi ka tūtaki koe ki tō hoa aroha, ka awhi i a rātou, ā, ka meinga koe e rātou kia ora, kia pai hoki ki a koe anō, ā, ka wareware koe ki te te hara tinihangaKāore koe e aro ki ngā whakaaro o ētahi atu, ko koe anake me tō hoa hou te mea nui. Ā, ko taua ngākau nui he ingoa anō mō ​​te aroha.

He aha te āhua o te aroha i roto i ngā hononga? I te nuinga o te wā, ka puta tēnei ina kitea ngā tohu e aroha ana tō hoa ki a koe. Kāore he mea ataahua atu i te aroha e whakahokia mai ana ki a koe. Ae, e whakaae ana mātou tatauranga kāore i te taha i a koe, nā te mea e 3% noa iho o ngā hoa moepuku ka moe. Engari tera ētahi moepuku ka roa mō ngā tau. Mena koinei tō āhua tūturu, ā, e māia ana koe ki ō kare ā-roto mō tēnei tangata, ko te tumanako ka tika āu whakatau ā muri ake nei.

12 Ngā Tohu e Huri Ana Te Hononga Ki Te Aroha

Kei te whakaaro koe ki te tangata, kei te hiahia rānei koe ki te kōrero ki a ia i ngā wā katoa? He maha ngā wā ka whakataurite koe i tō hoa moepuku ki tō hoa rangatira? Kei te pai koe ki te whakapuaki i ngā kōrero whaiaro mō tō oranga ki a ia? Mena he āe te whakautu ki ēnei pātai katoa, kāti, e hoa, he he tohu kei te aroha koe me tō hoa moepuku.

Kei te whakaaro koe ki te raruraru "I moe tāne ahau, ā, i aroha ahau ki a ia. Me aha ahau?"? Kei te whakaaro rānei koe, "I aroha ahau ki te tangata i moe tāne ahau. He aha te tikanga o tēnei mō taku marena?" Ki te mea kei te āwangawanga koe kei kino haere te moe tāne, ā, kei pā kino ki tō oranga marena, noho noa iho, ka arotake i ō kare ā-roto me ō mahi.

Ki te mea kua whakatau koe ki te whakamutu i tētahi hononga aroha ki tētahi e arohaina ana e koe hei painga mō tō mārenatanga, ki te whakamutu rānei i tō mārenatanga kia noho tahi ai me te tangata e arohaina ana e koe, me haere tonu. Engari ki te mea kei te ngana tonu koe ki te tukatuka, ki te mārama rānei i ō kare ā-roto mō tēnei tangata kē atu i roto i tō ao, tukua mātou kia āwhina i a koe. Anei ngā tohu 12 e huri ana tētahi hononga aroha hei aroha:

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1. Kei roto tonu i tō hinengaro te tangata

He kohu moe tāne, he aroha tūturu rānei? Ki te mea kei roto tonu i tō hinengaro tō hoa moe tāne, tera pea kei te rangi te aroha. Ki te kore e taea e koe te tango atu i a ia i roto i tō hinengaro, ki te mea ko ia te tangata tuatahi e whakaarohia ana e koe ina ara ake koe, ko ia te tangata whakamutunga kei roto i tō hinengaro ina moe koe, he tohu tēnā kei te kaha haere te moe tāne.

Ka pēhia tō puku e ngā pūrerehua ina whakaaro koe ki tēnei tangata. E hiahia tonu ana koe ki te noho tahi me rātou, ki te kōrero rānei ki a rātou. Ka riro i a rātou tō hinengaro, ā, ka uaua ki a koe te aro ki tētahi atu mea. Hei tāpiri atu ki tēnā, ki te taupokina e ēnei whakaaro te kare ā-roto o te hara mō te tinihanga Ki tō hoa rangatira, ko tētahi o ngā tohu nui tēnā e huri ana te mahi pūreirei hei aroha.

2. Kua tīmata koe ki te whakarite i tō hoa rangatira me tēnei tangata motuhake

He maha tonu āu whakarite i tēnei tangata i roto i tō ao ki tō hoa rangatira? Ki te pena koe, he tohu tēnā kei te kaha haere te whanaungatanga. Ina whakarite koe i tō hoa rangatira me te tangata e moe tahi ana kōrua, tera pea kei te titiro koe ki a ia hei hoa pai, hei hoa rangatira rānei māu. Ki te pono, he tohu tēnei mō te aituā.

Ki te mea kei te whakaaro koe, "E aroha ana taku tāne ki tana hoa moepuku?", "Ka whiriwhiria rānei e taku wahine tana hoa moepuku i ahau?", tirohia mēnā kua tīmata tō hoa rangatira ki te kite i ō hapa, ki te whakapae rānei i a koe mō ngā mea katoa e hē ana. Ki te pērā, kei te tika pea ō whakaaro.

Tērā pea ka puta he raruraru, he raruraru rānei i te whakataurite pakanga i roto i te oranga marena nā te mea kei te kitea ohoreretia e tō hoa rangatira ō hapa, ā, kei te whakanuia tēnei tangata kē i roto i tōna mahunga. He tohu tēnei kei te whanake haere ō rātou kare ā-roto mō te hoa moepuku, ā, kei te wareware, kei te riri rānei ki a koe nā te mea kāore koe i te 'pai' pērā i a rātou.

3. He nui ake tō wā e noho tahi ana me tō hoa moepuku i tō hoa rangatira

Kei te hiahia koe ki te whakapau i te wā roa ki tēnei tangata? He nui ake tō pai ki a rātou i tō tō hoa? Ka whakarērea, ka whakakorea rānei e koe ō mahere katoa ki te tūtaki ki a rātou ahakoa he torutoru noa ngā haora? Mena koinei te āhua, he pai pea ki a koe te noho me te whakaaro ki te momo whanaungatanga e tohaina ana e koe ki tō hoa moepuku.

Ko tētahi o ngā tohu hei tirotiro māu kia mōhio ai mēnā he hononga ā-ira, he aroha tūturu rānei, ko te kite i te nui o te wā e noho tahi ana koe me tēnei tangata, me te nui o tō koa ki a rātou. Mēnā he pai ki a koe te noho tahi me rātou i tō hoa rangatira, kimihia, hangaia rānei he take hei tūtaki ki a rātou, kōrero teka rānei mō tō wāhi noho kia kore ai e noho tahi me tō hoa rangatira, ko ngā tohu kei te huri te hononga ā-ira hei aroha kei roto i a koe. ngā whanaungatanga uaua.

4. Ka tohaina e koe ngā taipitopito whaiaro mō tō oranga ki a rātou

He rite te ahua o te whanaungatanga ki te aroha? Āe, ki te pai koe ki te whakapuaki i ngā kōrero whaiaro mō tō oranga ki tēnei tangata, āe pea. Kei te aroha koe, nā te mea ko tētahi o ngā tohu e kore e taea te whakakorekore kei te kaha haere te whanaungatanga. I te nuinga o te wā ka ngoikore tātou, ka whakapuaki rānei i ngā kōrero whaiaro mō tātou anō ki te hunga e whakawhirinaki ana tātou, ā, e tata ana ki a tātou. Ki te mea kei te whakapuaki koe i ō whakaaro ki tō hoa whanaungatanga, ā, e pai ana ki te mōhio kei te mōhio rātou ki te taha kino o koe, kāti he mārama noa iho mēnā he kohu whanaungatanga, he aroha tūturu rānei.

Ko tō hoa moe tāne te tangata tuatahi e hiahia ana koe ki te whakapuaki i tētahi whanaketanga o tō oranga, i tētahi tohu nui rānei? Ko rātou te tangata tuatahi ka waea atu koe mēnā he rā uaua tōu? Kua whakapuakina e koe ō mea ngaro hohonu rawa atu ki a rātou? Mēnā ko te whakautu he āe, kei te huri pea te whanaungatanga ki te aroha. Mēnā kua whakapuakina e koe ngā mea kāore anō kia kōrerotia e koe ki tō hoa rangatira, kua raru kē koe, e hoa.

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5. He nui ake tō whawhai ki tō hoa rangatira i mua

Kāore koe i te tino mōhio mēnā he pūrākau aroha noa iho, he aroha tūturu rānei? Āe, anei tētahi whakamātautau māu: mēnā ka huri ngā kōrero katoa me tō hoa rangatira hei tautohe, kua whiti kē koe i te rārangi o te aroha noa, te pūrākau noa rānei, ā, kua tau ki a koe ngā kare ā-roto kaha mō tēnei tangata. Ko tētahi tēnei o ngā tohu nui e huri ana te pūrākau aroha hei aroha.

Ko tā kōrua tautohetohe tonu me tō hoa rangatira, me te tiaki i ngā mahi aroha mō tō hoa hou, tera pea koinei te tīmatanga o tētahi... te moe tāne i waho o te marena mō te wa katoaHe mea tika kia kīia, ina hiahia koe ki tētahi atu tangata, ā, ka tino hari koe i a rātou, ehara te hoki ki te kāinga ki tō hoa rangatira i te mea tino pai o tō rā. Nā te mea kāore te kāinga e noho tahi ana kōrua ko tō hoa rangatira i te wāhi harikoa mōu, ko ngā mea katoa e kōrerotia ana e rātou, e mahia ana rānei e rātou, tera pea ka whakapataritari i a koe.

Tērā pea ka mau tō hinengaro i ngā whakaaro pēnei i te, "Ko ia te take kāore e taea e au te noho tahi me te tangata e arohaina ana e au", "Kei te whakangaro ahau i tōku ao mā te noho tonu ki tēnei marena kua oti kē". Heoi anō, ka puta te hau o te riri me ngā kupu mamae puta noa i tō whare, ā, ko te hoa rangatira i arohaina e koe i mua ka noho hei tangata kino i roto i tō kōrero.

6. Ngā tohu e huri ana te hononga ā-ira hei aroha: Kāore koe e mōhio ana ki tō āhua

He āhua tangata te hiahia kia ātaahua tō āhua i mua i te tangata e arohaina ana e koe. E hiahia ana koe kia whakaatu i tō āhua pai, kia pai ai te whakaaro. Heoi, ina whakatūria he hononga hōhonu ki tētahi, ā, ka tīmata te aroha ki a ia mō tōna āhua, ā, ka pērā anō, ka noho ko te āhua o te tinana hei mea tuarua. Ko tētahi o ngā tohu tino kitea o te whanaungatanga nui ko te kore e aro nui ki tō āhua i mua i tō tūtakitanga ki tēnei tangata motuhake, pērā i tō wā i tīmata ai te hononga.

Ae, tera pea ka whakapau kaha tonu koe me te wā ki te whakakakahu i mua i te tūtaki ki tō hoa moepuku, engari ina noho tahi koe me rātou, ka nui ake tō whakamarie i a koe. Ki te kore koe e wehi kei kite rātou i a koe i tō āhua me te kite i a rātou he ātaahua i ngā āhua katoa, he tohu tēnā kua hinga koe i te aroha. Kei te pātai tonu koe, "He aha te āhua o te moepuku he rite ki te aroha?"

7. Ka heke te whanaungatanga ki tō hoa

Nā te memeha haere o te whanaungatanga, tērā pea i whakaaro tō hoa rangatira, "Kei te aroha taku tāne ki tana hoa moepuku?" Tērā pea kei te mamae tō tāne i te whakaaro, "Kei te aroha taku wahine ki tētahi atu tāne?", nā te mea kua tahuri ke koe ki ana mahi whakahihi. Whakaarohia mēnā he tika ngā whakapae a tō hoa rangatira.

Mena ka kitea e koe te mawhiti atu i tō hoa ā, i a koe e whakatata atu ana ki tēnei tangata kē atu i roto i tō ao, kia mōhio koe kei te huri haere te whanaungatanga ki te mea nui, ki te mea aroha. Ina aroha koe ki tō hoa, ka tīmata te heke o tō whanaungatanga tinana, ā-hinengaro rānei ki tō hoa rangatira. Ka iti ake tō kōrero ki a rātou, ka iti ake hoki te wā e noho tahi ana koe me rātou nā te mea kei te pukumahi koe ki tēnei tangata motuhake.

Kāore rawa he hononga ā-ira tangata nā te mea ka tīmata koe ki te hiahia ki tō hoa moepuku. Kāore koe e piripono ā-tinana ki tō hoa rangatira nā te mea kei te moemoeā pea koe mō taua mea anō me tēnei atu tangata i roto i tō ao. Ka huri katoa tō arotahi.

8. Ka whakapuaki koe i ō raruraru marena ki a rātou

Ko tētahi o ngā tohu tino kitea kei te huri te hononga ā-ira ki te aroha ko te wā ka tīmata koe ki te whakapuaki i ō raruraru marena ki tētahi atu tangata. He mea tino koretake te kōrero mō tēnei mea. raruraru marena me te hiahia aroha. Engari ki te mea he mea noa iho tēnā ki a koe, kia mōhio koe ehara tō hononga i te mea noa iho.

He mahi hē, he mahi whakarihariha hoki te whakapuaki i ngā kōrero mō ngā tautohetohe, ngā pakanga rānei i waenganui i a kōrua ko tō hoa rangatira, te kōrero kino rānei mōna ki tō hoa rangatira mō te moepuku. Heoi, ki te kitea e koe kei te whakapuaki koe i ngā raruraru o te marena, i ētahi atu raruraru whaiaro rānei ki tēnei tangata, kua hinga pea koe i te aroha.

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9. Ki tō whakaaro ko rātou te hunga e tino mārama ana ki a koe

He rite te ahua o te aroha ki te whanaungatanga? Āe, ki te mea kei te whakaaro koe kāore he tangata e mārama ake ana ki a koe i tō hoa mahi, koinei tētahi o ngā tohu noa e huri ana te whanaungatanga hei aroha. Tērā pea kei te whakaaro koe kua tūtaki koe ki tētahi e tino mārama ana ki a koe, e mōhio ana hoki ki a koe i tētahi atu, tae atu ki tō hoa rangatira. Te āhua nei kua tae koe ki tētahi wāhi e hono hohonu ana ngā kare ā-roto, e mārama ana rānei ki a rātou.

He rite ngā hiahia me ngā whāinga o te ao o kōrua, ā, koinei te mea e motuhake ai tēnei hononga. Ki tō whakaaro he pai ake tō rāua mārama ki ō tirohanga, ki ō kare ā-roto rānei i tō hoa rangatira. Mena koinei te āhua, tera pea kei te pāngia kōrua e tētahi raruraru. take aronganui me ratou.

10. Ka kōrero kōrua tetahi ki tetahi i ngā hāora rerekē

Kei te kōrero koe ki tō 'hoa' i ngā hāora rerekē? Kua huri ngā karere kuputuhi, ngā waea, me ngā īmēra hei kōrerorero i te pō, kua horapa rānei ki ngā hāora o te ata? Kua piki haere te auau o te whakawhitiwhiti kōrero? Mena koinā te āhua, he tika pea tāu whakaaro "I moe tāne ahau, ā, i aroha ahau ki a ia (ki a ia rānei)". Tērā pea kua neke atu tō moe tāne ki tētahi taumata e whai ake nei, ā, kua riro ko te āhua o te aroha.

Kei roto tonu tēnei tangata i tō hinengaro, koia koe e kore ai e taea te karo i te kimi take hei kōrero ki a ia. Tērā pea ka raru tō kōrua marena nā te mea kua hipa kē i te paepae o tētahi hononga noa, ā, kua huri hei mea nui. Ki te waiho tētahi karere, waea rānei mai i tēnei tangata i a koe me te kare mahana, te pōuri rānei, me te mea kei te pōuri koe, kua tino ohorere koe.

11. He uaua ki a koe te arotahi ina tata mai te tangata kē

He mea noa te uaua ki te arotahi ina noho tahi ana tō hoa moepuku ina he hoa aroha koe. e kukume ana, e aroha ana rānei ki tētahiKa taea e ia te whakapōrearea i tō whakaaro, te tahuri rānei i tō aro ki tēnei tangata kotahi nāna i whakanui ake tō koiora. He mea noa te kore e taea te whakaaro, te mahi rānei i tētahi atu mea i roto i taua āhuatanga.

Ka ngaro te wā i a koe e noho tahi ana me rātou. Ka wareware koe ki ō raruraru me ō āwangawanga katoa mō tētahi wā. Kāore e taea e koe te mutu te whakaaro ki a rātou. Ka ngaro tō moe, ā, e hiahia ana koe kia kite anō i a rātou. He rite tonu ki te whakahokinga o ō kare ā-roto i te wā i aroha ai koe ki tō hoa rangatira. Ki te puta anō tēnei, e mōhio ana koe koinei tētahi o ngā tohu tino kitea e huri ana te hononga ā-ira ki te aroha.

12. Ka tīmata koe ki te whakaaro i tētahi heke mai me tēnei tangata

Ko tētahi o ngā tohu tino kitea kei te huri te hononga ā-ira ki te aroha ko te wā ka tīmata koe ki te moemoeā, ki te whakaaro rānei mō tētahi heke mai me tēnei tangata motuhake. Ki te mea kei te whakaaro tonu koe mō te āhua o te noho tahi me tō hoa, te piripono rānei ki a ia, kua nui rawa tō piripono ki a ia. Tērā pea ka tīmata koe ki te whakamahere ki te whakarērea tō marena mō te hoa moepuku.

Mena kua aroha kōrua ko tō hoa aroha tetahi ki tetahi, he mārama kei te hiahia kōrua kia noho tahi kōrua i te ao katoa. Mena kua whakaarohia e kōrua he heke mai mō te whānautanga, ko te tikanga kei te aroha kōrua. Engari i te uru atu ki tētahi o aua hononga i waho o te marena mō te wā katoa, he mea tika kia mutu te whanaungatanga me tō hoa rangatira o nāianei i mua i te tīmatanga o te oranga me tēnei tangata motuhake.

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Ka taea rānei te noho hei aroha pono te moepuku i waho o te marena?

I mua i tā tātou whakautu i tēnā, me titiro whakamuri tātou ki te moepuku o Piriniha Charles rāua ko Camilla Parker Bowles i waho o te marena mō ngā tau maha. Ae. He tino mamae te ngākau i te wehenga me te matenga pōuri o Pirinihi Diana. Ahakoa ngā āhuatanga uaua katoa, i noho tahi a Charles rāua ko Camilla tetahi ki tetahi, ā, i moe rāua i te tau 2005. Me pēhea te whakamārama i tēnā me te kore e tūhura i te... rohe o te aroha ponoHe aituā harikoa tā rāua i pā mai, engari ko te aroha te tūāpapa o tētahi hononga roa.

tatauranga Whakaaturia mai ko te 10% o ngā moepuku i waho o te marena e roa ana i te kotahi rā engari he iti iho i te kotahi marama, 50% e roa ana i te kotahi marama engari he iti iho i te kotahi tau, engari ko te 40% e roa ana i ngā tau e rua, neke atu rānei. He iti noa ngā moepuku i waho o te marena e roa ana i te whā tau, ā, he iti iho anō hoki e roa ake ana i tērā. Ki te kore he aroha me te hononga kare ā-roto i roto i te whārite, kāore he whanaungatanga e roa ana mō taua roa. Ki te pērā tōu, he tohu mārama pea ehara i te mea ko te harikoa o te hua rāhui, te whakahihiri moepuku rānei anake i hono mai, i pupuri hoki i a kōrua.

Ehara mātou i te tangata hei whakahe i a koe mēnā kei te moe tāne koe, engari ko te tumanako ka mōhio koe ki tēnei ngā mōrearea me ngā hua kei roto, inā koa mēnā he tamariki kei roto i te pikitia. E mōhio ana koe ki tō whanaungatanga engari e mōhio ana koe ka kino ngā pānga ki a kōrua ko tō hoa rangatira. Ko te puremu tētahi o ngā mea tino uaua ki te whakatau i roto i te marena.

Kua rongo katoa tātou mō ngā mahi moepuku i waho o te marena mō te wā roa. Kua pānui tātou mō ētahi mahi moepuku e roa ana mō ngā tau. Engari me mōhio koe ka tūpono tonu koe ki te hopukina, ki te whara hoki i tō hoa i arohaina e koe i mua. Ko tētahi huarahi whai hua ki te whakatau i te āhuatanga ko te kōrero tika ki tō hoa rangatira mō tēnei mea.

Ahakoa e hiahia ana koe whakamutua tētahi hononga ki tētahi e arohaina ana e koe, ki te mutu rānei te whanaungatanga ki tō hoa rangatira nā te mea i aroha koe ki tō hoa moepuku, kia tuwhera tonu ngā ara whakawhitiwhiti kōrero. Kōrerotia te moepuku ki tō hoa rangatira – he pai ake mēnā ka mōhio rātou ki a koe i tētahi atu. Tirohia he kaiwhakatakoto whakaaro mō te marena, he kaiwhakaora hinengaro rānei. Ka taea e rātou te āwhina i a koe ki te whakapuaki i ō kare ā-roto ki tō hoa rangatira, me te whakatau pai ake i te āhuatanga. Ki te rapu āwhina koe, Te rōpū a Bonobology he pāwhiri noa iho te tawhiti ki te tiki i ngā kaiwhakaora whai raihana me ngā kaiwhakaora wheako.

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Kāore tō koha e kiia he kaupapa aroha takohaMā tēnei ka taea e Bonobology te kawe mai i ngā mōhiotanga hou me ngā mōhiotanga hou ki a koe i roto i tā mātou whainga ki te āwhina i te tangata katoa o te ao ki te ako me pēhea te mahi i tetahi mea.