Njira 11 Kutchula Mayina Mu Ubale Kumawononga

Kufalitsa chikondi

“N’chifukwa chiyani sitingathe kungokhala ndi chakudya chabwino chabata kunyumba?”
“Anzanga onse akubwera kuphwandoko.
"Sizingakhale zosangalatsa kwa ine ndi amatsenga ..."
"Zitha kukhala, ngati simunakhale ab*t%$ nthawi zonse"

Ndipo monga choncho, kukambirana kosavuta kokhudza chakudya chamadzulo kwafika mu gawo lapoizoni la kutchula mayina. Zachisoni, izi sizomwe zimachitika kamodzi kamodzi pamwezi. Kutchulana mayina m'maubwenzi mwina ndi vuto lofala kwambiri koma lomwe silikambidwa pang'ono la chikondi chamakono.

Kodi Kuitana Mayina N'kutani?

M'ndandanda wazopezekamo

Kutchula mayina ndi pamene mumagwiritsa ntchito mawu kuti musalumikizane koma kukhumudwitsa munthu wina. Chilichonse kuyambira kunyozedwa ndi kunyozedwa mpaka kunyozetsa thupi la munthuyo ndi kutchula mayina. Ngakhale kusala munthu chifukwa cholephera kuchita zinthu mwa apo ndi apo ndi njira yotukwana.

Anthu ena amachigwiritsa ntchito kukhumudwitsa wozunzidwayo ndikuwononga kudzidalira kwawo. Kwa ena, ndi zosangalatsa zopanda vuto. M'maubwenzi abwino, nthawi zambiri amakhala omaliza. Koma nachi chinthu chokhudza kutchula mayina ndi kutukwana m'maubwenzi: simudziwa kuti ndi barb iti yomwe ingakhudze kwambiri.

Ubwenzi ukangolowa mu dambo loopsa la kunyoza, zinthu zonse zimaipiraipira. Mumadzipeza mukugwiritsa ntchito nthawi ya mikangano yaubwenzi , ndipo zinthu zimaipiraipira pambuyo pake. Posakhalitsa, kunyoza kumakhala chinthu chofunikira kwambiri pa zokambirana zambiri.

Zitsanzo za Kuitana Mayina Pamabwenzi

Ndikukhulupirira kuti ambiri a inu muvomereza kuti kutchula mayina ndi koyipa muubwenzi. Komabe, mutha kukhala mukuchita izi pafupipafupi osazindikira. Ndaziwonapo zikuchitika pafupipafupi m'gulu la anzanga komanso abale anga.

Amalume anga ali ndi chizolowezi chosagwiritsa ntchito dzina la munthu powatchula. Amakhulupirira mayina apadera opanga moŵa kunyumba kwa mamembala onse abanja. Ndi njira yosonyezera chikondi chake kwa ife. Mutu wanga - chifukwa cha mano anga a tonde - ndi 'Bugs Bunny'. Ambiri a m'banja lathu adziwa mayina tsopano. Koma masiku oipa, amalume anga nthawi zambiri amakwiya kwambiri. Kawirikawiri, kuchokera kwa mkazi wake chifukwa chomutcha dzina lolakwika pa malo olakwika.

N'zomveka bwino. Kwa anthu ena, zimakhala zovuta kusiyanitsa nthabwala zosangalatsa, zokondweretsa ndi zopweteka, zonyoza komanso zaukali, zomwe zimapangitsa kuti pakhale zizindikiro zosonyeza kusalankhulana bwino muubwenzi . Onani zitsanzo zotsatirazi:

"Oh my God, n'chifukwa chiyani ukukwiya chonchi!?"
Ndiwe wotchipa kwambiri!
"Ndinu ochititsa nyansi!"
"Ndiwe woluza momvetsa chisoni bwanji!"
“Ndiwe wosayankhula!

Tsopano, ndi ziti zomwe zili pamwambazi zomwe zikuwoneka zonyansa kwambiri, ndipo ndi ziti zomwe zikuwoneka ngati zopanda vuto kwa inu? Onetsetsani kuti mufunsenso mnzanuyo. Pali mwayi wokwanira, iwo akhoza kukhala ndi malingaliro osiyana pa izo.

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Njira 11 Kutchula Mayina Mu Ubale Kumawononga

Martin Teicher, katswiri wa zamaganizo ku Harvard Medical School, wanena kuti achinyamata omwe amachitiridwa nkhanza ali ana amakhala pachiwopsezo chachikulu chodwala matenda amisala akakula. Kafukufukuyu adawonetsa kuti kunyoza mobwerezabwereza m'magulu a anzawo kungayambitse kuvutika maganizo, nkhawa, komanso kudzipatula. Kutchula mayina obwerezabwereza komanso kutukwana muubwenzi kungakhale ndi zotsatira zofanana.

Pamene mawu achipongwe amachokera kwa anthu ofunika kwambiri m'moyo wanu, zotsatira zake zimakula. Kutchula mayina m'maubwenzi sikoopsa osati kwa kusinthasintha kwa banja komanso ku thanzi lawo. Tiyeni tiwone momwe kutchula mayina kumakhudzira ubale:

1. Kutchula mayina kumayambitsa kusadzidalira

Ichi ndi chopatsidwa. Lingaliro lonse la kutchula mayina limachokera pa kulunjika kwa wozunzidwayo. Komabe, mu maubwenzi achikondi, zotsatira zake zimakhala zamphamvu kwambiri. Wokondedwa wanu ndi munthu m'modzi yemwe amadziwa kusatetezeka kwanu kwakukulu. Choncho akamatchula mayina achipongwe, ululuwo umakhala wokulirapo kwambiri.

kutchula mayina ndi kutukwana mu maubwenzi — Kutchula mayina kumawononga ubale

Padzakhala nthawi zomwe anyamata inu mudzamenyana ndi kunena zinthu zosasangalatsa kwa wina ndi mzake. Koma m’pofunika kuti wina ndi mnzache asamakumane ndi zinthu zomwe zili pachiwopsezo. Kotero ngakhale mutakwiyira kwambiri mnzanuyo, kumbukirani kupewa kukambirana nkhani zomwe amakukhulupirirani nazo.

2. Zimasonyeza kupanda ulemu

Chikondi chingakhale chosatha koma chimatha muubwenzi wa nthawi yayitali. Pali masiku omwe mnzanu amakupangitsani misala ndipo n'zosatheka kupitiriza kumupatsa chikondi. Chinthu chimodzi chomwe chimakupangitsani kukhalabe ndi moyo masiku otere ndi ulemu muubwenzi . Kulemekeza mtundu wa munthu amene mwamuna wanu ali. Kulemekeza chisamaliro chawo ndi kudzipereka kwawo. Ngati ulemuwu utha, ubalewo umakhala ngati watha.

Kutchula mayina kungawononge kwambiri kulemekezana kwa okwatirana. Ngakhale zitachitika kutentha kwa mphindi, zotsatira za kutchula mayina mu maubwenzi zingakhale zozama. Zingapangitse mnzanuyo kumva kuti simukukondedwa komanso wosalemekezedwa nthawi yomweyo.

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3. Ikhoza kukula mosavuta

Josh ndi Riley, anzanga apamtima, ndi awiri mwa anthu okoma kwambiri omwe ndinawapezapo. Riley, komabe, ali ndi chizolowezi chongotchula mayina mwanthabwala. Amachita izi mwa anthu oyandikana nawo okha, ndipo sizinabweretse mavuto aliwonse. Kuchita zimenezi muubwenzi wachikondi, mwachionekere, ndi nkhani yosiyana kotheratu.

Nthawi ina adatcha Josh kukhala wolephera pamaso pathu tonse chifukwa cha kusankha kwake nyimbo zomwe zidamupangitsa kuti anyozeke m'njira yomwe sitinawonepo. Adakuwa motele Riley ndikutuluka mwaukali ndikuzimitsa foni iyi.

Palibe nthawi muzochitika izi panali kufunika kotchula mayina, komabe, ndizo zomwe zinachitika. Kutchula mayina kumangoyamba, mumangodziwa kuti palibe kubwereranso. Sizitenga zambiri kuyambitsa kutchula mayina ndipo zimatengera ngakhale zochepa kuti zichuluke.

4. Imayika munthu wina m'njira yodzitchinjiriza

Kunyoza kumabweretsa kusiyana pakati pa anthu. Ngakhale kuchitidwa nthabwala, kunyoza kungayambitse mkwiyo muubwenzi ndi mkwiyo m'maganizo mwa wozunzidwayo. Mukalankhula ndi munthu - makamaka mnzanu - m'mawu onyoza, mwachibadwa amayamba kudziteteza pa kusadzidalira kwawo komanso kudziona kuti ndi ofunika. Akangoikidwa pamalo otere, zimakhala zovuta kwambiri kulumikizana naye.

5. Kutchula mayina kumawononga maganizo

Munthu akamakangana ndi wokondedwa wake, n’zachibadwa kuti munthu akhale wosatetezeka m’maganizo. Kuwatchula mayina pa nthawi yovuta ngati imeneyi kumapweteka kwambiri. Kungachititse munthu amene akuvutika maganizo kumva ngati kuti zosowa zake za m’maganizo sizikukwaniritsidwa. Kunyoza anthu muubwenzi kungayambitse mavuto aakulu a m’maganizo komanso ngakhale kuvutika maganizo. Ndi mtengo woipa kwambiri woti munthu apambane mkangano.

6. Zimasokoneza zokambirana

Nthawi yomwe mumaponya mawu achipongwe kwa mnzanu, kukambirana - ngakhale kofunika bwanji - kwatha. Mutha kupitiriza kulankhula pambuyo pake ndipo mnzanuyo akhoza kuyankha, koma mitima yawo ili yotsekedwa. Palibe chomwe munganene kuyambira pamenepo chidzakhala ndi zotsatira zake. Ziribe kanthu momwe mungayesere kukhala woganiza bwino kapena womvetsetsa pambuyo pake, omvera anu mwataya kale.

7. Zimapweteka wolankhula komanso womvera

Kutchula mayina kumabweretsa maganizo oipa kwambiri mwa wolankhula kuposa womvera. Simumazindikira kukhumudwa komwe kumayamba mkati mwanu mukamatchula mayina achipongwe. Koma m’kupita kwa nthaŵi, maganizo odzisungira amenewo adzakupwetekani. Ndipo liwongo limene liyenera kutsatiridwa lidzangowonjezera ululu. Kutchula mayina m'mabwenzi ndi lupanga lakuthwa konsekonse. Gwiritsani ntchito kapena muyang'ane nazo, mudzalipira mtengo muzochitika zonsezi.

8. Zimapangitsa kudzikayikira

Mukamutcha dzina la mnzanu ngati 'wotayika wonunkha' kapena 'nkhope yamatsenga', zimakhazikika m'malingaliro awo. Iwo angaoneke ngati alibe vuto lililonse, koma amakumbukirabe akakhala okha. Mayina anu amawaika m’njira yobwerezabwereza ya kudzikayikira: “Kodi ine ndikununkhadi zoipa? “Kodi ndine wosakongola?”

Kudzikayikira kungabwere m’njira zosiyanasiyana. Ena amadziona kuti ndi opanda nzeru zokwanira kapena otchuka mokwanira. Kwa ena, zimawapangitsa kukayikira za moyo wawo kapena zandalama zawo. Mulimonse momwe zingakhalire, kudzikayikira kumawononga kwambiri ubale komanso thanzi lamalingaliro la anthu okhudzidwawo.

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9. Kutchula mayina a anthu ena kumawononga kukhulupirirana

Palibe kuphwanya kukhulupirirana kwakukulu kuposa kugwiritsa ntchito ziwopsezo zamkati za wina motsutsana nawo. Ndicho chifukwa chake kutchula mayina muubwenzi kuli ngati kusakhulupirika. Pamene anthu awiri ali pachibwenzi, amamasuka kwambiri kwa wina ndi mzake.

Kugawana kumabwera ndi kudalirana kosabisa komwe onse awiri adzateteza kufooka kwa wina ndi mnzake. Chifukwa chake mukamatchula mayina a mnzanu ndikuukira mbali yawo yofooka, mukuswa kudalirana kwawo. Zingakhale zovuta kwambiri kukonza ubale mavuto a kudalirana akayamba kukulirakulira.

10. Cholinga chake ndi kulamulira

Kutchula mayina ndi kupezerera anzawo. Zosavuta komanso zosavuta. Anthu omwe amachita zotchulira mayina muubwenzi wawo amafunikira kulamulira okondedwa awo. Amanyozetsa munthu winayo kudzera mwamwano ndi mawu achipongwe kuti asamade nkhawa zawo. Choipa kwambiri n’chakuti wovutitsidwayo pamapeto pake amadalira kwambiri chivomerezo cha wopezererayo.

Kulimbana ndi zofooka zamaganizo za munthu n'koipa mofanana ndi kuzunzidwa. Ngakhale sizikuwoneka, kutchula mayina kumasiya zipsera m'maganizo zomwe zimatha moyo wonse.

11. Palibe chabwino chotuluka m'menemo…Nthawi zonse!

Mikangano ndi mikangano sizingapeweke muubwenzi uliwonse. Mkangano wa nthawi zina pakati pa okondedwa ndi mkangano wina ukhoza kukhala wabwino paubwenziwo , bola ngati pamapeto pake utha. Kuthetsa mkangano moyenera ndikofunikira monga chifukwa chake. Palibe nthawi yomwe kunyoza kungathetse mkangano. Ngati pali chilichonse, kungapangitse kuti zinthu ziipireipire.

Tengani chitsanzo cha Amanda ndi Steve. Kukangana muubwenzi wawo kunasintha kwambiri pomwe Amanda adazunza Steve mokwiya kwambiri, yemwe adayankha ndikuphwanya laputopu yake kuti ikhale ting'onoting'ono ndikuyang'ana kutsogolo kuti amumenye. Izi ndi zomwe zimatengera kutchula mayina kuti mutulutse mkwiyo wanu. Zidzatsogolera mnzanuyo kukunyozani kapena kusiya kulankhula. Palibe amene amachita zabwino pamkangano womwe uli nawo kapena ubale wonse.

Tsopano popeza mukudziwa momwe kutchula mayina kumakhudzira ubale, tiyeni tikambirane momwe tingathanirane nazo. Muubwenzi wabwino, kutchula mayina nthawi zonse kumakhala kosafuna. Ndipo njira yothetsera vutoli ndiyosavuta: OSATI kukhala pithy. OSAlankhula momveka bwino. Gwiritsani ntchito mawu onse omwe muli nawo pofotokoza zakukhosi kwanu. Lankhulani zakukhosi kwanu ndipo limbikitsani mnzanuyo kuchita chimodzimodzi.

Mfundo yopereka malangizo amenewa ndi yosapita m’mbali. Nthawi yomweyo, simuyenera kutembenukira ku ma jibe akuthwa kuti mufotokoze mfundo yanu.

Nthawi zina, anthu amadziwa bwino kuti kutchula mayina ndi koipa muubwenzi koma izi siziwalepheretsa kuchita nawo. Kuthetsa milandu yotere kumatha kukhala kovutirapo chifukwa kumakhudzanso kuzindikira momwe munthu amagwirira ntchito. Kufunafuna chitsogozo cha akatswiri ndiyo njira yanzeru kwambiri yochitira zinthu ngati zimenezi.

Tisanamalize, chikumbutso chaubwenzi: Kutchula mayina kaŵirikaŵiri kumazikidwa mozama m’mawu athu. Ambiri aife timazitenga tili ana ndipo zimakhala zovuta kuzichotsa. Koma tiyenera. Makamaka, ngati zikukupwetekani inu ndi okondedwa anu. Ndipotu, si zizolowezi zonse zakale zomwe ziyenera kukhala ndi malo m'tsogolomu.

Ibibazo

1. Kodi kutchula mayina mu maubwenzi kuli bwino?

Zimatengera mphamvu zomwe mumagawana ndi mnzanu. Ngati kutchula mayina kumagwiritsidwa ntchito ngati njira yosonyezera chikondi kapena kuwonjezera kuseŵera paubwenzi, ndiye kuti zili bwino. Komabe, kudziletsa ndiko chinsinsi. Ngakhale mukuchita nthabwala, kutchula mayina kuyenera kutsogoleredwa ndi mtima wachifundo. Ngati dzina la mnzanuyo likukuvutitsani, ndiye kuti liyenera kusiya. Zilibe kanthu kuti cholinga chake ndi chiyani pankhaniyi chifukwa zotsatira zake ndizosavomerezeka.

2. Kodi kutchula mayina amawononga bwanji pachibwenzi?

Kutchula mayina kungakhale kowononga kwambiri kusinthasintha kwa banja. Kutchula mayina mobwerezabwereza kumangowonjezera kudalirana ndi ulemu umene anthu aŵiri amakhala nawo kwa wina ndi mnzake. Kumafooketsa unansiwo limodzinso ndi mtendere wamaganizo wa anthu okhudzidwawo.

Kuitana mayina m'maubwenzi, mwabwino kwambiri, kumakwiyitsa wolandirayo. Ndipo zikafika poipa kwambiri, zimatha kuwononga ubale wawo. Pali zitsanzo zambiri zomwe kutchulana mayina mosalekeza m'maubwenzi kwapangitsa kuti anthu okondana azidana.

3. Kodi mungathane bwanji ndi kutchula mayina muubwenzi?

Njira yolunjika komanso yowona mtima nthawi zambiri ndiyo njira yabwino yothetsera nkhani zambiri zaubwenzi. Lankhulani ndi mnzanuyo za momwe kutchula dzina kumakukwiyitsani. Yesani kukambirana zimenezi pa nthawi yoyenera. Kukambilana mwamsanga mukangoyambana kungapangitse mnzanuyo kudziikira kumbuyo kapena kudziimba mlandu.

Njira ina yothanirana ndi vutoli ndi kudzera mu upangiri wa ubale. Upangiri waukatswiri ukhoza kubweretsa chidwi ku mbali zowoneka bwino za vuto ndikupereka mayankho otsimikizika. Pazovuta kwambiri, kuthetsa chibwenzi kungakhale chisankho choyenera pakapita nthawi.

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Chopereka chanu sichikutanthauza chopereka chachifundo . Chidzalola Bonobology kupitiliza kukubweretserani chidziwitso chatsopano komanso chaposachedwa poyesetsa kuthandiza aliyense padziko lonse lapansi kuphunzira momwe angachitire chilichonse.