Zinthu 9 Zosavuta Zomwe Zingathe Kusudzulana

Kufalitsa chikondi

Mwina munaonapo mnzanu akusudzulana ndipo mukuchita mantha kuti zingakuchitikireni. Kapena mwina ndewu "zachizoloŵezi" zikutha pang'ono. Chilichonse chomwe chakupangitsani kuti musindikize pankhaniyi, popeza tsopano mukuyang'ana kuti mutsimikizire chisudzulo chanu, mwachita kale njira yoyenera.

Koma, kodi mumayesa bwanji kutsimikizira chisudzulo cha ukwati wanu, pamene chinthu chokhacho chomwe mungagwirizane nacho ndicho chakuti mumangokhalira kukangana? Kodi “mpaka imfa idzatilekanitse” ndi cholinga chothekadi?

Ngakhale kuti ulendo wonse sudzakhala woyenda bwino (kodi pali chilichonse m'moyo chomwe chingakhalepo?), ndizotheka kutsimikizira chisudzulo chaukwati wanu. Ayi, sizidzafunika matsenga a voodoo kapena matsenga akale. Zomwe zingatenge ndikulumikizana pang'ono ndi khama. Tiyeni tiwone momwe mungayambire kutero, miniti yomwe mwamaliza ndi nkhaniyi.

Njira 9 Zothetsera Chisudzulo-Umboni Waukwati Wanu

M'ndandanda wazopezekamo

Kodi mungathe kutsimikizira ukwati wanu? Lingaliro lakhala likundifikira m’mutu mwanga kuchokera pamene ndinalandira uthenga wa pa WhatsApp wakuti: “Zatha. Linachokera kwa mmodzi wa anzanga apamtima, onse a zaka 32 zakubadwa ndipo m’chaka cha 3 cha moyo waukwati. Panali patangotha mwezi umodzi kuchokera pamene ena a ife tinasonkhana kuti iye ndi Jason asangalale kunyumba.

Onse awiri anali kuchita bwino mwaukadaulo, mbiri yawo yapa media media inali yosilira, ndi maulendo angapo apadziko lonse lapansi, zithunzi zanthawi yabwino komanso zina zachikondi. Zonse zinkawoneka bwino, ndipo panalibe zizindikiro zochenjeza za chisudzulo. Anamenyana kwambiri, nzoona, koma kachiwiri, ndi banja liti lomwe silikhala ndi mikwingwirima yomwe nthawi zina imakhala yaphokoso komanso yachipongwe? Koma kusudzulana? Sitinachiwone chikubwera.

Ngati chisudzulo chingachitike muukwati wangwiro wotero, ndiye kuti chisudzulo chingachitikire aliyense. Mikwingwirima siyambitsa kusudzulana, kapena amatero? Kodi pali njira yothetsera chisudzulo m'banja?

Monga momwe zikukhalira, kutsimikizira chisudzulo ukwati wanu sikovuta kwenikweni monga momwe mungaganizire. Palibe mantra yomwe imapangitsa maukwati kugwira ntchito; palibe nsapato yokwanira tonsefe. Komabe, zinthu zina ndizofala m’maukwati ambiri, ndipo ngati mungatsatire mfundo 9zi, mungakhale mukutsimikizira chisudzulo chaukwati wanu. Tiyeni tikambirane mwatsatanetsatane.

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1. Momwe mungathetsere banja lanu: khalani patali kwanthawi yayitali

Malinga ndi APA, 40 mpaka 50 peresenti ya maukwati amasudzulana. Ngati mukufuna kusudzulana-chisudzulo ukwati wanu, chinthu choyamba muyenera kuzindikira kuti kukhala pabanja sikutanthauza kuti nthawi zonse, mwakuthupi, kukhala ndi mnzanuyo.

Zoonadi, papepala, ukwati ndi wakuti anthu aŵiri amatulukirana ndi kuthera nthaŵi pamodzi. Koma mukudziwa kale kuti zingakhale zovuta kuti banja likhale lolimba ngati onse awiri amagwirizana nthawi zonse. Nonse awiri muyenera kukhala motalikirana kuti muzisangalala ndi nthawi imene mumakhala limodzi.

Malo aumwini mu chiyanjano amagwirizanitsa. Ayi, sizikutanthauza kuti inu awiri muyenera kuyamba kuyenda nokha. Kutenga malo enaake kungakhale kosavuta monga kuthera kumapeto kwa sabata, kapena kungopeza nthawi yanu pa Lachinayi laulesi.

2. Chotsani khadi lamalingaliro

Palibe ukwati umene ulibe mikangano ndi ndewu. Ambiri aife timakonda kusunga zolemba za "Ndinalondola" komanso "Ndinakuuzani choncho" timalavula mwachidwi. Mulimonse momwe zingakhalire, kusunga makhadi kuti mwakhala "olondola" kangati kumatha kuwononga ubale uliwonse ndipo ukwati ndi chimodzimodzi.

Sankhani chimwemwe kuposa kupambana, khalani woyamba kusiya mkangano ndikuyang'ana zomwe zili zofunika kwambiri kwa inu. Ndikuvomereza, nzosavuta kunena kuposa kuchita. Koma nsonga zazikulu zaukwati zomwe aliyense angakupatseni ndikuti simuli "kupambana" mikangano, koma kukhazikika pa mayankho opindulitsa onse.

3. Muzisunga bwino ndalama

Kukangana kwachuma kungawononge ngakhale maukwati amphamvu kwambiri. Anthu aŵiri akakhala odzipereka kwa wina ndi mnzake, ayenera kukambitsirana nkhani zandalama popanda mmodzi wa okwatiranawo kukhala wodzitetezera kapena waukali. Chofunika koposa, payenera kukhala poyera pazachuma m’banja.

Palibe chuma chobisika kapena maakaunti, palibe kunama zamavuto azandalama. Kusunga ndalama zilizonse kapena ngongole kukhala chinsinsi kuchokera kwa mwamuna kapena mkazi wanu zimachuluka kusakhulupirika pazachuma. Kumbukirani, ndinu gulu lomwe likugwira ntchito limodzi kukwaniritsa zolinga zofanana.

Pamene ndinali kugwira ntchito nthawi zonse, ndinali kupeza ndalama zambiri, koma pamene ndinasiya kuti ndisamalire angelo anga aang'ono awiri, tinayenera kukonza njira yatsopano yogwiritsira ntchito ndalama ndi kusunga. Onse aŵiri okwatirana ayenera kukhala ololera ku masinthidwe oterowo pamene akuyang’ana chitsimikiziro cha chisudzulo cha ukwati wanu. Kuwonanso momwe ndalama zanu zilili pakatha milungu ingapo kukuthandizani kuti muzitha kuwongolera ubale wanu.

4. Dziwani zinthu zomwe mumakonda kuchita

Mukuyang'ana njira zopulumutsira ukwati wanu ku chisudzulo? Zitha kukhala zophweka monga kukhala ndi chidwi chogawana nawo mini-gofu kapena kutolera ndalama. Chabwino, mwina osati chinthu chopunduka monga zinthu zimenezo, koma inu mumamvetsa mfundo.

Yesani zinthu zatsopano, gawanani zomwe mumakonda ndikupeza zomwe mumakonda. Zingakhale zovuta kupeza chisangalalo pamodzi poyamba, koma pang'onopang'ono, mumatero. Ndiyeno pali zambiri zatsopano zomwe zingayesedwe, zomwe nonse mungathe kuzikonda.

Zimathandizanso ngati inuyo ndi mwamuna kapena mkazi wanu mumadziwana bwino musanalowe m’banja. Akatswiri amavomereza kuti mwayi wa mabanja opulumuka chifukwa cha mantha a kusudzulana umakhala wokulirapo ngati okwatirana akhala pachibwenzi kwa nthawi yayitali asanatengere ubale wawo pamlingo wina.

A phunziro zikusonyeza kuti anthu amene ali pachibwenzi kwa zaka ziwiri asanalowe m’banja amakhala ndi mwayi wothetsa banja ndi 20% poyerekeza ndi amene ali pachibwenzi pasanathe chaka. Kutha kwa chisudzulo kumatsika ndi 39% ngati nthawi yaubwenzi musanalowe m'banja inali zaka zitatu kapena kuposerapo. Zizindikiro za banja losasangalala nthawi zambiri zimakhala zovuta, choncho samalani.

china chiphunzitso cha udokotala amachirikiza mkhalidwe umenewu, akumalingalira kuti okwatirana amene athamangira ukwati m’miyezi isanu ndi umodzi yoyambirira ali pachibwenzi ali paupandu waukulu wa kusudzulana. Pamene munganene moona mtima kuti mumamudziwa mnzanuyo, wanu akhoza kungoyandikira pafupi kukhala ukwati wosatsutsika.

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5. Koma tsatiraninso zofuna zanu

Ngakhale kuli kofunika kuchita zinthu zimene mumakonda monga mwamuna ndi mkazi, kufunafuna zokonda zanu kulinso kofunika kwambiri pofufuza mmene mungasulire ukwati wanu. Lingaliro lakuti mutha kusudzulana ndi umboni wa ukwati wanu mwa kuchita zinthu zimene zimakulekanitsani lingamveke kukhala lopanda phindu, koma zinthu zimenezi zimasonkhezera kudzikonda kwanu ndi kudzikhutiritsa.

Kuchita chinthu chomwe mumakonda kumabweretsa chisangalalo ndikukupangitsani kuti mukhale odzimva bwino, ndipo munthu yekhayo amene amakhutira ndi iye yekha ndi amene angayesetse mgwirizano mu ubale. Kumbukirani, simungathe kutsanulira kuchokera mu kapu yopanda kanthu. Mwanjira iyi simudzimva kuti mwatayika m'moyo momwe mumangoyembekezeredwa kukwaniritsa zokhumba za mnzanu ndi banja lanu.

Ukwati umabweretsa kusintha kwakukulu m’miyoyo ya amuna ndi akazi. Kusunga chikhumbo chakale chamoyo pochitsatira mwachangu ndi kupanga nthawi ya izo ziribe kanthu zomwe zimakuthandizani kuti mugwirizane ndi gawo lakale lanu ndipo motero simukuvutika ndi chidziwitso cha kutaya chidziwitso.

6. Langizo laukwati wakale: gawani ntchito zapakhomo mofanana

Kunena zoona, zonse zimene zimafunika kuti mukhale pafupi ndi mawu akuti “ukwati wotsimikizira kusudzulana” ndi mgwirizano panyumba. Ndipo imodzi mwa njira zabwino kwambiri zopezera izi ndikugawaniza ntchito zapakhomo ndikuwonetsetsa kuti mukukoka kulemera kwanu.

Komanso, imodzi mwa zabwino kwambiri njira zosonyezera chikondi ndikugwira ntchito zapakhomo za mnzako za tsikulo, kuwapatsa tsiku lopuma. Ngati icho sichikufuula chikondi muukwati, sitikudziwa chomwe chimachita.

7. Lankhulani za zinthu zina osati ana ndi mabilu

Imeneyi ndi imodzi mwa njira zabwino kwambiri zopulumutsira ukwati wanu ku chisudzulo. Padzakhala masiku pamene mulibe choyankhula kupatula ana, mabilu, ndi kugona. Ana anga angosiyana chaka chimodzi ndi theka, kotero kwa zaka zisanu zotsatizana, tinalibe moyo wocheza. Palibe abwenzi ambiri omwe ankabwera kudzacheza ndipo nthawi zambiri tinkatopa kwambiri kuti tisatengere ana awiri kulikonse.

Tinkakambirana za chakudya cha ana, chimbudzi cha ana, katemera wa ana ndi ndalama za mwezi uliwonse. Ndinangomvetsera mnzanga wina akukambirana za mavuto omwewo m’pamene ndinaganiza zoti ndilankhule ndi mwamuna wanga nkhani zina osati ziŵirizi. Ichi ndi chimodzi mwazinthu zazikulu zomwe zimachepetsa mwayi wosudzulana.

Ndinayamba kukambirana naye za ndale, tinayamba kukambirana za magalimoto atsopano, tchuthi chotsatira, ndi zina zotero. Tinkakambirana zinthu zomwe sizinali zokhuza mwana kapena achibale.

Kukambilana zinthu mosiyana ndi moyo wokhawokha kudzakuthandizani kwambiri. Pitirizani, konzekerani tsiku lausiku ndikuyesa. Mutha kundithokoza pambuyo pake.

8. Dzisamalire

Izi ndizofunikira kwambiri osati kungotsimikizira chisudzulo chaukwati wanu komanso ngati mukufufuza momwe mungasungire umboni waukwati wanu. Sindiyembekezera kuti mwamuna wanga angandikope ngati nthawi zonse akandiyang’ana amaona chilombo chosowa tulo komanso chakututumula. Kapena akafika pafupi, ndikumva fungo la mkaka, kukodza, ndi chimbudzi.

Ndimakonda kumuvekera, kudzola zodzoladzola ndikumupatsa moni ndikumwetulira. Mofananamo, amayesetsa kusunga minofu yake, chifukwa amadziwa kuti ndimakonda thupi lake lopangidwa bwino. Tonsefe timafuna kukhala okopeka wina ndi mnzake komanso sungani motowo, kotero timasamalira maonekedwe athu. Umu ndi momwe zimagwirira ntchito; timadzisamalira tokha, kusamalira ukwati wathu. Izi zimapatsanso aliyense wa ife uthenga woti sititengana mopepuka.

Monga lamulo la thupi, ndi chizolowezi chabwino kutuluka mu sweatpants ndi PJs, ikani khama pang'ono pokonza maonekedwe anu kuti asonyeze chilakolako muukwati. Zingawoneke ngati ntchito yowopsya pachiyambi, koma mudzadabwitsidwa kuzindikira kuti imagwiranso ntchito modabwitsa pa kudzidalira kwanu.

Ikani patsogolo Kudzisamalira: Pezani nthawi yochita zinthu zomwe zimakusangalatsani, kaya kuchita masewera olimbitsa thupi, kuwerenga, kuchita zinthu zomwe mumakonda, kapena kungopumula.
Pitirizani Kukhala Payekha: Limbikitsani zokonda zanu ndi mabwenzi kunja kwa banja.
Lankhulani Momasuka: Fotokozani zakukhosi kwanu ndi zosowa zanu momveka bwino kwa wokondedwa wanu, kupewa mkwiyo ndi kusamvetsetsana.
Ikani Malire: Khazikitsani malire abwino kuti muteteze malo anu enieni komanso moyo wanu.
Foster Mutual Respect: Chitirani mnzanuyo mokoma mtima ndi kumuganizira, ndipo yembekezeraninso chimodzimodzi.
Kondwererani Zomwe Mukuchita: Vomerezani ndi kuyamikira zomwe mwakwaniritsa, zazikulu ndi zazing'ono.
Pitirizani Kukula: Osasiya kuphunzira, kufufuza, ndi kusinthika monga munthu payekha.

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9. Palibe malamulo okhudza kugonana

Pa Intaneti pali zambiri zokhudza maubwenzi apakati pa anthu okwatirana. Kuchokera pa zomwe zili zoyenera kugonana mpaka kangati okwatirana ayenera kugonana - muyenera kuyang'ana mmwamba, kuwerenga ndi kukhumudwa. Ndiye pamene ndinauza mwamuna wanga kuti intaneti imati tizigonana katatu pa sabata - tinali kupita mwina kamodzi pamwezi! - adaseka ndipo adati ngati ndili wokonzeka, nayenso ali.

Ndipo ndinazindikira, sindinali. Ndili ndi makanda awiri, kugonana kunali kopanda nzeru. Apa m’pamene ndinazindikira kuti ziwerengerozo sizikugwirizana ndi ukwati wathu ndipo tinali abwino mmene tilili. Ngakhale zili bwino, zimalimbikitsidwa, kuti mufufuze njira zomwe mungasungire ubale wanu kukhala watsopano ndikuletsa kuti banja lisalephereke, simuyenera kukakamizidwa kutsatira upangiri uliwonse womaliza kwa T.

Pokhapokha mutakhala mu a ukwati wopanda kugonana, palibe chifukwa chodera nkhawa. Tengani zomwe zimakugwirirani ntchito, sinthani maupangiri ndi maupangiri kuti agwirizane ndi zomwe mukukumana nazo ndikutaya zomwe sizingagwire ntchito kwa inu.

Ngakhale ndikulemba maphunzirowa lero, ndikukhulupirira kuti mugwiritsa ntchito ena m'banja lanu ndipo mutidziwitse ngati zinthu zikuyenda bwino kwa inu. Kapena tiuzeni ngati pali chinthu chinanso chimene mungachite kuti chisudzulo chitsimikizire ukwati wanu. Cholinga chimakhala chimodzimodzi, yendani mpaka kumapeto mutagwirana chanza.

Ibibazo

1. Kodi ndingatani kuti ukwati wanga usalephereke?

Kuti ukwati usalephereke, maziko a unansi uliwonse, ndiko kuti, kulemekezana, kukhulupirirana, kulankhulana momasuka, malo aumwini, malire, ndipo ndithudi, chikondi, ziyenera kukhalapo. Kukambitsirana pankhani zachuma kudzakuthandizani kukhazikika pa zolinga zamtsogolo komanso malire abwino. Yesetsani kuika patsogolo kulankhulana kwabwino ndipo musaope kupeza gawo limodzi kapena awiri kuchokera kwa mlangizi wa mabanja pamene zinthu sizili bwino.

2. Kodi ukwati wapoizoni ungapulumutsidwe?

Mongoyerekeza, ukwati wapoizoni ungapulumutsidwe mothandizidwa ndi uphungu waukwati, koma kudzipereka kotsimikizirika kukhala unansi wabwino koposa kuyenera kukhala kofunika kwambiri. Popanda kudzipereka kusintha ndikukhala anthu abwino kwa wina ndi mzake, palibe ukwati wapoizoni womwe ungapulumutsidwe. Komanso, ngati kawopsedwe wabweretsa kuvulazidwa m'thupi / m'maganizo, kubwezeretsanso kukhulupirirana ndikukhazikitsa kulemekezana nthawi zambiri ndi njira yayitali komanso yovuta.

3. Kodi ndingathetse chisudzulo?

Ngati chiwawa sichili mbali ya chithunzichi, uphungu wa chisudzulo usanachitike nthawi zambiri umakhala wovomerezeka mwalamulo. Mothandizidwa ndi uphungu woterewu, mutha kungothetsa chisudzulo mukafika pa gwero la nkhani zanu zonse ndikupeza zomwe muyenera kuchita kuti muthetse mavutowo.

Maganizo Final

Kumbukirani kuti ukwati wolimba ndi wosangalatsa suchitika mwangozi. Zimafunika khama lokhazikika, kudzipereka, komanso kufunitsitsa kukulitsa kulumikizana kwanu tsiku lililonse. Mwa kuphatikiza machitidwe osavuta koma amphamvu awa muubwenzi wanu, mutha kupanga mgwirizano womwe ungapirire mayeso a nthawi.

Ngati mukuyang'ana malangizo owonjezera kapena chithandizo cholimbitsa banja lanu, alangizi athu ali pano kuti atithandize. Musazengereze kufikira ndi kutenga sitepe yoyamba ya ukwati wokhutiritsa ndi wosasudzulana.

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