Ingabe kungokwemvelo ukuzizwa ungabongwa ebudlelwaneni? Yebo. Ngezinye izikhathi ebudlelwaneni besikhathi eside, abalingani bavame ukuwela ogibeni lokuthathana kalula. Uma usekupheleni kwalokhu, ubuyokwazi kahle kamhlophe ukuthi umuzwa ongabongiwe ebudlelwaneni obungakwenza ukuze uzethembe kanye nenhlalakahle yakho yonke. Ukuthi kungokwemvelo ukuzizwa ngale ndlela akusho ukuthi kuyinto enhle.
Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi wenzani, awubonwa omunye wakho obalulekile. Ngisho noma ubenzela into enhle neyothando, akukho nhlobo ukwazisa. Kuphinde kubonakale sengathi awenzi noma yimuphi umzamo ohlangothini lwabo futhi udonsa ubudlelwano phambili. Uzizwa nje ukuthi ubambekile, ungaqhubeki uye phambili noma uhlehle.
Uma ungabalulekanga ebudlelwaneni, kubeka uphawu lombuzo omkhulu ekuzihlonipheni kwakho. Enguqulweni yakho, wenza konke okusemandleni akho ukulinganisa umsebenzi ophumelelayo nobudlelwano obunempilo. Ngezikhathi ezithile, ubalungiselela ukudla abakuthandayo noma ubaphathele izimbali. Naphezu kwakho konke lokhu, uma othile engayazisi imizamo yakho, iphula inhliziyo yakho kancane.
Lezi yizimpawu ezimbalwa zokuzizwa ungaziswa ebudlelwaneni. Uma uke wabhekana nazo mathupha, udinga ukuphendula umbuzo obalulekile: Yini okufanele uyenze uma ungazizwa ubalulekile ebudlelwaneni? Ukuze sikusize uthole impendulo, sixoxe nodokotela wengqondo uDevaleena Ghosh (M.Res, eManchester University), umsunguli weKornash: The Lifestyle Management School, ogxile ekwelulekeni kwemibhangqwana kanye nokwelashwa komndeni. Ngakho-ke, ake siqale ukucacisa ubunzima bobuhlobo bakho.
Kusho Ukuthini Ukungabongwa Ebudlelwaneni?
Okuqukethwe
Ubudlelwano abuzizwa njalo njengothingo lwezinsikazi kanye nezinyoni ezinde. Budlula ezimweni ezinhle nezimbi. Kodwa-ke, ukungazizwa ubalulekile ebudlelwaneni kuyisibonakaliso esibomvu okufanele ungasinaki . Kuyadumaza ukungaziswa ngumlingani wakho ngalokho okwenzayo, kodwa into enhle ukuthi ungama futhi uguqule lo mkhuba. Ukuze wenze lokho, okokuqala udinga ukuqonda ukuthi kusho ukuthini ukungaziswa ngumlingani wakho. Uma owesifazane ezizwa engaziswa noma indoda icabanga ukuthi “Ngizizwa ngingaziswa yintombi/umkami”, kungase kusho ukuthi:
- Uthathwa kalula ngumlingani wakho
- Wenza konke ukuzidela kodwa imizamo yakho ayibonwa
- Umlingani wakho akasho ukuthi “Ngiyabonga” ngakho konke omenzela kona kanye nobudlelwano
- Uzakwenu akachithi isikhathi esihle nawe. Bakhetha ukuba nabangane babo noma benze izaba zokungasichithi isikhathi nawe
- Aziyinaki imicabango nemizwa yakho futhi azisizi ngalutho izeluleko noma imibono yakho ezindabeni ezibalulekile
Abantu abaningi bahlangabezana nesigaba sokungazizwa bebalulekile ngemizamo yabo ngesikhathi esithile ebudlelwaneni. Ngakho, ungakhathazeki. Asikho isizathu sokutatazela. Akudingekile ukuthi uqedele izinto nomlingani wakho yize uzizwa ungabongisiwe ebudlelwaneni ngaphandle kokuthi, vele, sekuphenduke ukuhlukumeza ngokomzwelo noma ngokomzimba. Manje ake sidlulele ezimpawini zokungazizwa ubalulekile ebudlelwaneni nezinto ongazenza njengomuntu wesifazane noma owesilisa uzizwa ungabongiwe ebudlelwaneni.
Wazi Kanjani Uma Umaqondana Wakho Engakwazisi?
Ungase uzizwe uphansi othandweni kodwa lokho akusho ukuthi umlingani wakho akabongi ngaso sonke isikhathi. Lokhu kungenzeka futhi ngoba nobabili benimatasa ngezinhlelo zenu futhi beningachithi isikhathi esanele ndawonye. Noma kungaba ngenxa yokukhulumisana okubi phakathi kwenu nomlingani wakho. Akukho nokukodwa kwalokhu okusho ukuthi ukubaluleka kwenu empilweni yabo kuye kwehla.
Kwesinye isikhathi imicabango yokuzizwa ungabongisiwe ebudlelwaneni ingase ibe umphumela wezinto ezenzeka empilweni yakho. Ngezinye izikhathi, kungaba nje ufunda kakhulu izenzo zomlingani wakho noma uveze ukungazethembi kwakho okucashile kuye. Ingabe uvame ukuzama ukuthola indlela yokungabi nandaba phakathi kobudlelwane bakho bangaphambili nobamanje? Ukuthi akuhambanga kahle akusho ukuthi kuzophinde kwenzeke. Cishe ucabanga ngokweqile.
Ngakho-ke, wazi kanjani ukuthi lokho okuzwayo kuwukuntula ukwazisa noma i-paranoia? Nazi izimpawu ezimbalwa ongazaziswa ebudlelwaneni bakho:
Ukufunda Okuhlobene: Okuhlangenwe Nakho Kwemibhangqwana Engu-6 Ngendlela Ukwelashwa Ngenkulumo Okusize Ngayo Ubudlelwano Babo
1. Bayeka ukukunaka
Ungase ugcine uzizwa ungathandwa yisoka lakho noma intombi yakho uma bengakuthandisisi uthando lwakho. Uma bekushiya endaweni engabonakali noma bengenzi mzamo wokwenza ubusuku obuhle bokuqomisana nawe ekhaya , ukungazizwa ubalulekile ebudlelwaneni kuyinto yemvelo. Uma usushade isikhathi eside futhi uqala ukuzizwa ungathandwa ngumkakho noma umyeni wakho, kungenzeka ukuthi umlingani wakho akasaboni izinto ezincane ngawe. Izinto ezazingabakhanga ngokungenakuphikwa ekuqaleni kobudlelwano benu.
Ngaphambili, babekwazi lapho ucasukile, ucasukile, noma uthukuthele. Manje, noma usunosuku olunzima, ababoni ukuthi ukhathele kangakanani, ingasaphathwa eyokubuza ukuthi yini ekukhathazayo. Lokhu kuguquguquka ekuziphatheni kwabo kungaba wuphawu lokuthi bakuthatha kalula empilweni yabo.
2. Izimpawu zokuthi uzizwa ungathandwa ebudlelwaneni bakho – Izinto ozenzayo aziziswa noma azihlonishwa
Enye into engakwenza uzizwe ungaziswanga ukuthi uma umlingani wakho enganaki yonke imizamo oyenzayo ebudlelwaneni. Izinto ezincane ezinganakwa zingacatshangelwa kodwa uma izinto ezinkulu, njengezenzo zothando , zingatholi inhlonipho, kungaba buhlungu kakhulu futhi akulona uphawu oluthembisayo lobuhlobo benu.
Isibonelo, wenzela uzakwenu isidlo sasekuseni esimnandi ngeSonto ekuseni. Cabanga ukuthi ungazizwa kanjani uma bengancomi noma bengakubongi ngakho. Bavele badle bahambe. Kubuhlungu ngempela, akunjalo? Ngokudabukisayo, lo muzwa welungelo uwuphawu oluqinisekile lokuthi umlingani wakho akakwazisi noma umzamo owenzayo ebuhlotsheni.
3. Imizwa yakho ayicatshangelwa lapho benza izinqumo
Bonke ubudlelwano bunezigaba zabo, ukukhuphuka nokwehla, izigaba ezijabulisayo kanye neziqephu ezimbi. Kodwa-ke, ebudlelwaneni obunempilo, awuzizwa ungabonakali futhi unganakekelwa ngisho nangezikhathi eziphansi kakhulu. Kodwa, uma nganoma yisiphi isikhathi, uzithola ucabanga, “Kungani ngizizwa ngingabongisiwe ebudlelwaneni bami nesoka lami?” noma “Ngizizwa ngingaziswa yintombi yami”, kungenzeka ukuthi omunye wakho obalulekile uyeke ukucabangela imizwa yakho lapho enza izinqumo.
Umzala wami, uRobin, ungitshele ukuthi wayezizwa ethathwa kalula komunye wobudlelwano bakhe lapho isoka lakhe limbiza ukuze bahlangane noma nini lapho ekhululekile. Akukho nakanye isoka lakhe elake lambuza ukuthi linaso isikhathi noma lifuna ukuhlangana. Waqala ukuzizwa sengathi uyisifebe futhi wazizwa sengathi uyisifebe.
4. Ukusondelana phakathi kwenu kwehle kakhulu
Isibonakaliso sokuthi awubalulekile ebudlelwaneni bakho kungaba ukuthi noma ungazama kangakanani, awukwazi ukusondela kumlingani wakho. Lokhu kuyiqiniso ikakhulukazi uma isikhathi enisichitha nobabili sinciphile muva nje. Lolu hlobo lwebanga lungathinta ezothando nokuxhumana ebudlelwaneni.
Izimpawu zokuthi intombi noma isoka lakho alazi ukuthi liyazisho zizokukhombisa ukuthi limatasa kakhulu kangakanani ukuze lingaze likuhlangabeze. Ngisho noma nibonana, linamathele ocingweni lwalo. Azikho izikhathi ezimnandi zokubambana ngezandla , ukugona, noma injabulo yokuqabulana ehholo lamabhayisikobho.
Lokhu kuncipha kokusondelana kungaholela ekushintsheni ekuziphatheni komlingani wakho. “Umlingani wakho angase abonise isithakazelo esingavamile kwabanye abantu ngisho nezindleko zokukwenza uzizwe ungakhululekile,” kuphawula u-Devaleena, ekhuluma ngezimpawu ongazazisi ebudlelwaneni. Lolu shintsho lokuziphatha kungase kube isizathu sokuthi uzizwe ungaziswa umyeni wakho.
5. Izimpawu zokuthi awuzizwa ubalulekile ebudlelwaneni bakho -Ziyeka ukukwenzela umzamo
Ekuqaleni kwabo bonke ubuhlobo, kukhona umzamo omkhulu ovela ezinhlangothini zombili. Nizama ukubukeka kahle kakhulu kubo futhi nenzelana izinto ezinhle. Lezi zimpawu zothando nothando zingase ziqale ukwehla njengoba ubuhlobo buqhubeka futhi uzizwa ukhululekile. Kodwa uma zonke izinhlobo zemizamo zinyamalala, kuwuphawu olubi.
Lokhu kuyiqiniso ikakhulukazi kwabesifazane ngoba ngokuvamile baziwa ngokwenza ngaphezu kwalokho ukuze benze abanye babo ababalulekile bazizwe bekhethekile, bethandwa futhi baziswa. Uma lowo wesifazane okhethekile empilweni yakho eyekile ukwenza lezo zinto ezithandekayo ezenze inhliziyo yakho yeqa noma yayeka nokuzama ukubukeka kwakhe, khona-ke ukuzizwa ungabongisiwe umkakho noma intombi yakho kufanele nakanjani.
Izinto Eziyi-10 Okufanele Uzenze Uma Uzizwa Ungabongiwe Ebudlelwaneni
Ukuba sebudlelwaneni lapho imizamo yakho ingabuyiselwa khona kungaba yinto ekhathazayo kakhulu. Kufana nokusunduza idwala phezulu. Ukungazethembi okubangelwa ukuziphatha komlingani wakho okushisayo nokubandayo kungaba yingozi kakhulu ekuzithembeni kwakho. Lesi simo singakudida. Singakwenza ungazi ukuthi wenzeni.
Zicabange ushayele waze wafika ehhovisi likazakwenu ukuze ummangaze ngosuku lwakhe lokuzalwa. Kodwa abakubongi, noma okubi nakakhulu, basola wena ngokubaphoxa phambi kozakwabo. Kuyinto eyodwa uma othile engayazisi imizamo yakho. Kodwa ukukusola ngokunamathela noma ukubelesela kuyinhlamba.
Kunina nonke enizizwa ningabongisiwe ebudlelwaneni, uDevaleena uyeluleka, “Lapho uqaphela ukuthi usothandweni lapho uhlala uzizwa ungabongiwe futhi ungafuni ukubekezelela lokhu kuziphatha okungamukeleki, isiphakamiso sami siwukuba uqale ukwenza izinguquko ezincane kodwa ezinamandla.” Sikutshela ukuthi lezi zinguquko ezinamandla zibukeka kanjani ngalolu hlu lwezinto ezingu-10 ongazama ukuzenza uma uzwa sengathi awabongwa ebudlelwaneni:
Ukufunda Okuhlobene: Imisebenzi Eyi-9 Yokwakha Ukwethembana Ebuhlotsheni – Njengoba Kunconywe Ngumeluleki Wemibhangqwana
1. Bheka ukwazisa ngezenzo
Umuzwa wakho wokungabongwa ebudlelwaneni usekelwe ekuqaphelweni komlingani wakho. Uma bengakwazisi ngamazwi, kungase kube sengathi abanandaba nawe. Lokhu kuwukucabangela okulungile, kodwa uma ubheka ukuthi usothandweni kufanele uzame ukujula ukuze ubone ukuthi kunjalo ngempela yini.
Esikhundleni sokugxila ezintweni abazishoyo noma abangazikhulumi, zama nokubuka ulimi lomzimba wabo. Akuwona wonke umuntu okhululekile ukuveza imicabango yakhe, lokhu kuyiqiniso ikakhulukazi uma uthandana nomuntu ohlala yedwa , yingakho ugxila ezenzweni zakhe esikhundleni samazwi.
Sonke siyazi ukuthi izenzo zikhuluma kakhulu kunamazwi, ngakho qaphela lokho umuntu akwenzayo, ngisho nezinto ezincane kakhulu zingabaluleka. Okuthile okulula njengokuphinda ugcine okusanhlamvu kwakho okuthandayo ngaphandle kokuthi ubacele kungaba uphawu lokuthi basakukhathalela futhi bayayibonga imizamo yakho. Mhlawumbe, udinga ukufunda ulimi lothando lomlingani wakho ukuze uqonde ukuthi bayakwazisa, nakuba ngendlela yabo.
2. Zama ukucabangela ukuthi udlala indima yini ekuzizweni ungabongwa
Ngezinye izikhathi ukubanda komlingani wakho kungaba ukusabela kokuthi ukuziphatha kwakho kumenza azizwe kanjani. Asisho ukuthi wenze okuthile okungalungile ngamabomu, kodwa kunethuba lokuthi izenzo zakho bezingaba buhlungu. Kukhona nethuba lokuthi basidlulise lesi simo, okubenze bacasuka.
Kunoma ikuphi, kufanele uhlole futhi uhlole ukuthi ngabe kukhona yini okwenzile obekungaholela ebuhlotsheni bakho. Uma uzizwa ungabongiwe intombi noma isoka lakho, xoxa nalo ngakho ngaphambi kokugxumela kunoma yisiphi isiphetho.
Mhlawumbe, kuyinto ongayilungisa kalula ngokuxolisa ngobuqotho ngokulimaza imizwa yomlingani wakho. Kungaba ubuwula njengokulwa kwamasonto amabili abasakucabanga. Futhi nakhu, uwela egodini elimnyama lokuphelelwa yithemba. Beka izingxabano zakho etafuleni bese ubona ukuthi ungakwazi yini ukulungisa izinto nomlingani wakho.
3. Vumela umlingani wakho akubuze ngaphambi kokuba wenze
"Kungani ngizizwa ngingaziswa ebudlelwaneni bami?" Uma uzithola ubuza lo mbuzo kakhulu, impendulo ingaba ukuthi kungenxa yokuthi uvumela kakhulu. Kuyamangaza ukuthi ngemuva kokuhlala ndawonye isikhathi eside, ujwayelene kakhulu nomlingani wakho. Abakuthandayo, abangakuthandi, abakuthandayo, abakuthandayo - wazi konke. Ngokuyisisekelo, ayikho imfihlakalo ebudlelwaneni bakho.
Lonke lolu lwazi onalo, lwenza ukwenza izinto kwabanye bakho ababalulekile kube lula kakhulu. Ngemuva kwephuzu elithile, ubuchopho bakho buvele buzifake ngokuzenzakalela, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi wenzani. Isibonelo, uma usuzoba ne-apula, uvele ucabange ukusika elilodwa kumlingani wakho. Yize bengakayiceli.
Lokhu ukwenza ngoba uyazi ukuthi nabo bangathanda ukuba nalo. Kodwa lokhu kuziphatha kungakhuphula ukuncika kwabo kuwe. Ngakho-ke, esikhundleni sokubenzela yonke into ngaphambi kokuthi baze bakucele ukuthi ukwenzele, LINDA. Aqale abuze. Uma ufuna, ungababuza ukuthi bafuna wenze okuthile, kodwa yeka ukwenza izinto ngendlela enembile.
4. Zama ukuthi 'cha' ngezinye izikhathi
Esinye isizathu esingakwenza uzizwe ungabongiwe ebudlelwaneni bakho ukuthi uyavumelana futhi wenza konke abakushoyo. Ungakwenzi. Ukwesaba ukulahlekelwa umlingani wakho kungase kubangele, ikakhulukazi ekuqaleni kobudlelwane benu. Ngenxa yalokho, ungase uzame konke okusemandleni akho ukuba ungabacasuli, ngenxa yalokho ungase uyeke ngokuphelele ukuveza imibono yakho.
Lokhu kungaholela ekutheni uthathwe kalula. Uma ungawuphuli lo mkhuba, ukuxhumana kwakho kungawohloka kube ubudlelwano obuxhomeke komunye nomunye ngokuhamba kwesikhathi. Umuntu okhohlisayo angasebenzisa ukungazethembi kwakho njengethuba lokuthola indlela yakhe. Ngakho-ke, uma ungazimeli, cishe umnika uphethiloli ukuze akuthathe kalula.
Lapho owesifazane ezizwa engabongwa noma owesilisa ecabanga ukuthi “Ngizizwa ngingaziswa intombi yami”, bavame ukwenza okwengeziwe ukuze bathole lokho kwazisa. IMA. “Qala ukuthi “cha” lapho umlingani wakho ekucela noma elindele okuthile ongeke ukwazi ukumnikeza kona. Hhayi kukho konke, kodwa nakanjani ngezinto ongazithandi nezicelo ongazithola zingenangqondo. Lokhu kuzobonisa umlingani wakho ukuthi ukuvumelana naye kuwukukhetha okwenzayo, akusona isibopho.
5. Khuluma nomlingani wakho
Ukuxhumana kuyisihluthulelo sokwakha ubudlelwano obuqinile . Ukwesaba ukungqubuzana akufanele kukuvimbele ekuvezeni imicabango nemibono yakho. Uma uzizwa ungaziswa emshadweni noma ebudlelwaneni, kufanele wazise umlingani wakho. UDevaleena uncoma, “Qala ukuthuthukisa izwi, usho ubunzima bakho futhi uma omunye ebonakala engakunaki, ungakuyeki. Namathela esimeni sakho. Lapho uqhubeka nokuthwala umthwalo wemfanelo, kulapho belindele lukhulu kuwe.”
Uma owesifazane noma owesilisa ezizwa engabongisiwe ebudlelwaneni engayivezi imizwa yakhe, ekugcineni kuyokwakha ukucasuka. Ukuze ugweme lokho, kufanele uxhumane. Kukhona ithuba lokuthi imizwa yakho isuka ekuboneni kwakho siqu futhi ayibonisi ukuthi umlingani wakho uzizwa kanjani ngawe. Okuwukuphela kwendlela ongakwazi ngayo lokhu ngokuqinisekile ukukhuluma ngakho. Okwesibili, uma uzizwa ungabongisiwe ebudlelwaneni bakho, ukukhuluma ngakho kungaholela esixazululweni.
Ngaphandle kwalokho, ukukhuluma ngakho futhi wazise umlingani wakho ukuthi izenzo zakhe zikwenze uzizwe kanjani kuwukuphela kwendlela yokumnika ithuba lokulungisa izinto kusukela ekugcineni. Uma unenkinga yokukhuluma ngemizwa yakho, ungazama njalo ukwelulekwa. Khumbula, umlingani wakho akayena umuntu oyisangoma, ungumuntu nje njengawe. Okuwukuphela kwendlela abangakwazi ngayo ukuthi uzizwa kanjani uma ubatshela.
6. Hlukanisa abasebenzi phakathi kobudlelwane
Ubudlelwano obunohlangothi olulodwa bungaholela ekutheni umuntu oyedwa asebenze ngokweqile futhi angahlonishwa. Uma unomuzwa wokuthi ubuwenza wonke umsebenzi ebudlelwaneni bakho, udinga ukuxoxa ngalokhu nomngane wakho womshado. Kungase kube nesizathu salokhu kungalingani ebudlelwaneni bakho. Mhlawumbe, ngokwesibonelo, bangaphansi kwengcindezi enkulu emsebenzini. Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi kuyini, ukukhuluma ngakho kubalulekile. Ungumuntu futhi ukushisa ikhandlela kuzo zombili iziphetho kuzokufaka ubunzima obukhulu.
Uma ubulokhu uzizwa ungaziswa isoka lakho noma intombi isikhathi eside, bona ukuthi ungathola kanjani indlela ephakathi nendawo ukuze uphule le phethini. Isibonelo, uma isizathu siwukwanda komsebenzi womlingani wakho, khona-ke bangathatha izibopho zangempelasonto. Izinto ezifana nokuthenga igrosa banganikezwa ngenkathi uphatha imisebenzi yansuku zonke njengokupheka. Cabangela izimo zakho bese uhlukanisa umsebenzi.
Ukufunda Okuhlobene: Izindlela Ezi-8 Zokulungisa Ubuhlobo Obuphukile Nesoka Lakho
7. Zijwayeze ukuzithanda, uzazise futhi uzithuthukise
Ibanga ebudlelwaneni bakho lingaholela ekuzizweni ungaziswa, kodwa ngezinye izikhathi lelo banga alikwazi ukusekelwa. Izimo zingenza kube nzima ngani ukuba ndawonye ngokomzimba futhi akukho okuningi eningakwenza ngaphandle kokwamukela isimo. Isibonelo salokhu ubudlelwano obude , ikakhulukazi lapho abalingani behlala khona ezindaweni zesikhathi ezihlukene.
Ngenxa yokuthi wamukela i-dynamics entsha akusho ukuthi imizwa yakho ayilimali uma uzizwa ungahlonishwanga noma ungaziswanga, siyakuqonda lokhu. Ngakho-ke, ezimweni ezinjengalezi, sincoma ukuthi uthathe ithuba lokuzijwayeza ukuzithanda. Kunokuba uhlale ubheka izimpawu zokwazisa ebuhlotsheni, kuthiwani ngawe ngokwakho ngoshintsho?
Zinike isikhathi sokuhlola izimpumelelo zakho kanye nokukhula ngisho nangesikhathi sobudlelwane. Ungazama ukubhala iziqinisekiso ezintathu ezinhle njalo ekuseni ephepheni elinamathelayo bese uliphina ndawana thize endaweni yakho yokusebenza. Njengoba uphindaphinda amazwi amahle ekhanda lakho izikhathi ezingaphezu kwesisodwa, ekugcineni uzoqala ukuwakholelwa.
U-Devaleena uthi, “Yiba nomusa kuwe, nakanjani kuzoqala ukukwenza umuntu ojabule kakhudlwana.” Ukuthi izimo ziphoqa isithandwa sakho kude nawe akusho ukuthi awusakwazi ukuzithanda wena. Ukuzithanda kungenye yezindlela ezingcono kakhulu zokuqeda ukuzizwa ubalulekile ebudlelwaneni.
8. Yithi CHA emdlalweni wokusola
Ukuzizwa ungaziswa ebudlelwaneni kungaholela ekucindezelekeni nasentukuthelweni. Uzohlala uzizwa sengathi akukho lutho olwenzayo olubalulekile. Intukuthelo nentukuthelo yimizwa ekwenza uzizwe ulungile, futhi ngenxa yalokho, wonke umuntu unephutha. Uzoqala ukubala inani lezikhathi imizamo yakho engaqashelwanga. Esimweni esinjengalesi, kulula kakhulu ukuzibandakanya ekushintsheni icala . Imizwa yakho izokutshela ukuthi konke kuyiphutha lomlingani wakho, bese kuthi, okuzobona nje kube bomvu.
Ukusola kulula futhi kungakwenza uzizwe ungcono ngawe kodwa ngeke kubulungise ubudlelwano benu. Yonke ingxoxo ozoba nayo izoqala ngokuthi “Uhlala wenza lokhu!!” noma “Sengikushilo lokhu kaningi…” Lezi zingxoxo aziholeli esixazululweni ngoba ngokweqiniso, awuzifuni nhlobo izixazululo. Umcabango onjalo ungakha ibhuloho elingenakudlula ebudlelwaneni bakho.
Imizwa izokhula futhi ukucasuka kungase kukhule. Esikhundleni sokuvumela izinto ziye kude kangako, zama ukudedela izinto ezincane ezinganakiwe. Mhlawumbe bake bakhohlwa ukubonga ngokubashayela emsebenzini. Ungagxili ezintweni ezinjalo ezincane, ziyeke.
9. Funa ukungenelela kochwepheshe
Uma izinto sezifinyelele ezingeni lapho izingqimba zokungabongi ziholele ekuphazamisekeni kokuxhumana kodwa nisathandana futhi ufuna ukusindisa ubudlelwano, sekuyisikhathi sokubonisana nochwepheshe. Ukwelashwa kwabashadile kungaba yisixazululo esisebenzayo sokulungisa inkinga yokuzizwa ungabongisiwe ebudlelwaneni.
Esinye sezizathu ezenza ukukhulumisana phakathi kombhangqwana kuphele iminyaka eminingi yokukhungatheka nokucasuka. Ngaso sonke isikhathi esikhathini esidlule lapho bebengakhulumisani imizwa yabo komunye nomunye kuba nesandla enkingeni yokuxhumana obhekene nayo njengamanje. Ngenxa yalokho, ukukhuluma komunye nomunye kungagcina kuholela ezimpini nasezingxabanweni.
Kodwa-ke, awukwazi ukuqhubeka nokuzizwa ungaziswa ebudlelwaneni. Ngokuhamba kwesikhathi, kuzophazamisa ukuthula kwakho kwengqondo nokusebenza kahle emsebenzini, futhi kuphazamise zonke ezinye izici zempilo yakho. Esimeni esinjalo, umelaphi angasebenza njengeqembu elingathathi hlangothi ukuze akusize uqondise izingxoxo zakho ngendlela ezokusiza uthole isixazululo sezinkinga zakho.
UDevaleena uyeluleka, “Ukuze uthole ushintsho lwesikhathi eside, ukufuna ukwelashwa kuhlale kuyindlela enhle. Kuyasiza ekuxazululeni izingxabano ekhanda futhi kwenza kube lula ukuyeka imikhuba ejabulisa abantu evame ukubangelwa ukuhlukumezeka kwasebuntwaneni.” Uma ucabanga ukufuna usizo, abeluleki abanamakhono nabanamalayisense kuphaneli ye- B onobology balapha ukuze bakusize.
10. Cabangela ukuthi kungase kube nini isikhathi sokudlulela phambili
Ngezinye izikhathi ubudlelwano buphuma ngokuphelele esandleni lapho ngisho nokungenelela kochwepheshe kungeke kukusize uthole indlela yokuvala ukungezwani kwakho noma uqedele ama-grouse akho esikhathi eside. Uma ibanga phakathi kwenu nobabili liye lenyuka kangangokuthi alukho uhlobo lokungenelela olungasiza, khona-ke kungase kube uphawu lokuthi udinga ukuqhubeka.
Bonke ubudlelwano buyizindlela ezimbili futhi bobabili abalingani kudingeka benze umzamo olinganayo ukubusindisa. Nobabili kufanele nizimisele ukushintsha nokwamukelana. Uma ngisho nangemva kwemizamo ephindaphindiwe yokulungisa izinto, usazizwa ungabongisiwe ebuhlotsheni bakho, mhlawumbe ubuhlobo budinga ukuphela. Uma wamukela ngokushesha isiphetho salobu budlelwano, kuba ngcono kini nobabili, okungenani ngokuhamba kwesikhathi.
Ukufunda Okuhlobene: Ukwelulekwa Ngomshado - Imigomo Eyi-15 Okufanele Ihlangatshezwe Kusho Uchwepheshe Wezokwelapha
Kungani Kubalulekile Ukwazisa Futhi Ubongelwe Ebudlelwaneni?
Ukuzizwa ungaziswa ebudlelwaneni kungabangela imizwa yentukuthelo nenzondo kanye nokuziphatha okuphansi kokuzethemba , okugcine kubangele ukuthi ubudlelwano buphele. Ukuze ugweme isimo esinjalo, kubalulekile ukwazisa nokwaziswa ebudlelwaneni.
Uma umlingani wakho ekwazisa, uzizwa usekelwe, uthandwa, futhi unakekelwe. Kunomuzwa wokuphepha nokuvikeleka, inhlonipho, nokwethemba ukuthi umlingani wakho uyohlale ekufulathele, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi kwenzekani. Uma ukwazisa umlingani wakho, kumenza azizwe sengathi uyamazisa futhi umhloniphe ngalokho ayiko. Kubenza bazi ukuthi uyayibonga yonke imizamo nokuzidela abakwenza ngenxa yakho.
Uma abalingani bekwazisana, kubenza bazizwe bejabule futhi behlonishwa. Uzizwa ukhethekile futhi uyigugu lapho umlingani wakho ekwazisa ngoba uyazi ukuthi kukhona umuntu empilweni yakho obaluleke kakhulu kuye. Uzizwa ubalulekile futhi umuhle ngawe nangalokho okwenzayo. Sonke sifisa ukunakwa ngabalingani bethu futhi ukubonisa ukwazisa kungenye yezindlela ezinhle kakhulu zokukunikeza lokho. Kuyisihluthulelo sokwakha ubuhlobo obuhle nomuntu omthandayo.
Izikhombi Ezibalulekile
- Ukubonisa ukwazisa kubalulekile futhi kungenye yezisekelo zobudlelwano obuqinile
- Uma umlingani wakho ekuthatha njengento nje, engayazisi noma engayihloniphi imizamo yakho, engakunaki, noma engenanzuzo ngesikhathi sakho nemizwa yakho, yazi ukuthi awuhlonishwa ebudlelwaneni.
- Kunezinto ezithile ongazenza ukuze ulungise - bheka ukwazisa ngezenzo zomlingani wakho, funda ukuthi “Cha”, zijwayeze ukuzithanda, futhi uyeke ukugxekana.
- Funa usizo lochwepheshe. Kodwa, uma usagcina uzizwa ungabongisiwe ebudlelwaneni, mhlawumbe sekuyisikhathi sokuqeda izinto nomlingani wakho niqhubeke.
Ngakho-ke, manje usunakho konke odinga ukukwazi mayelana nokuba sebuhlotsheni obungenakwazisa. Uma kukhona esikuxoxile kuyiqiniso ebudlelwaneni benu, sekuyisikhathi sokuthi uyeke ukuvala amehlo ezindabeni zenu. Khuluma nanoma yini oyitholile mayelana nobudlelwano bakho futhi usebenzise izixazululo zethu ukulungisa lokho. Sithemba ukuthi uzokwazi ukubona izimpawu zokwazisa ebuhlotsheni maduzane. Ngikufisela okuhle!
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Umnikelo wakho awuyona iminikelo yokusiza . Kuzovumela i-Bonobology ukuthi iqhubeke nokukulethela ulwazi olusha nolusesikhathini njengoba sifuna ukusiza noma ubani emhlabeni ukuthi afunde ukwenza noma yini.
