Momwe Mungathetsere Banja - Njira 11 Zachinyengo

Kufalitsa chikondi

Mukudabwa momwe mungathetsere banja? Ndizopanda mtima pang'ono, simukuganiza? Ena akhoza kukukwiyirani tsinya monga choncho, nadzakuuzani kuti ndinu wophika molimba. Koma tikubetcha kuti muli ndi zifukwa zomveka zokhalira pano popeza mwatsala pang'ono kuchitapo kanthu. Chifukwa chake, nayi momwe mungathetsere ubale 101: Muyenera kukhala ozembera komanso ochita sewero kuti chiwembu chanu chikhulupirike.

Kodi mukuyesera kuthetsa wina ndi chibwenzi chake chifukwa chakuti 'munthu' ameneyo ndi bwenzi lanu lapamtima ndipo mukudziwa kuti iye ndi nkhani zoipa kwa iwo? Kapena mukufuna kuthetsa banja patali chifukwa mumamukonda kwambiri. Ndiye tikhoza kukudulani pang'onopang'ono. Kupatula apo, zonse ndi zabwino mu chikondi ndi nkhondo. Kaya chifukwa chake n’chotani, kumbukirani kuti n’kofunika kwambiri kuti mukhale ndi chikumbumtima choyera.

Momwe Mungathetsere Banja - Njira 11 Zachinyengo

M'ndandanda wazopezekamo

Wowerenga wathu wazaka 22, David, wakhala akukondana ndi Eleanor kuyambira ali kusukulu ya sekondale. Ankaopa kuti kuulula zakukhosi kwake kungawononge ubwenzi wabwino womwe anali nawo. Tsopano akucheza ndi mtsikana wochita sewero ndipo zikuwoneka kuti wamutaya kwamuyaya. David akuti, "Sindikufuna kuwononga mwayi wa aliyense wopeza chimwemwe. Ngati munthu uyu akanadziwa momwe angachitire mkazi bwino, ndikanasiya. Koma amakopa ena kumbuyo kwake ndipo amalankhula za akazi mwanjira yonyoza iye akalibe.

"Choncho, njira zoyipa zothetsera banja zikubwera m'maganizo mwanga chifukwa ngakhale sakufuna kukhala ndi ine, sayenera kukhala naye. Ayenera kukhala ndi munthu yemwe akudziwa kuti ali ndi mwayi wokhala naye. Ndakhala ndikudikirira kuti asiyane ndi chibwenzi chake. Yakwana nthawi yoti ndidzitengere nkhaniyi m'manja mwanga.

Inde, David. Mwafika pamalo oyenera ngati mukufuna kudziwa momwe mungapangire banja. Ingokumbukirani, simukufuna kuti adziwe kuti mudachita ngati chothandizira kukulitsa kugawanika kwawo. Mtundu umenewo umatsutsa cholinga chonse, sichoncho? Kuchenjera ndiye chinsinsi chothetsa banja popanda kudziwa.

Kafukufuku wa ophunzira aku koleji adapeza kuti 56% ya omwe adatenga nawo mbali adayesa kuwononga ubale wachikondi wa anthu ena ndipo kusokonezaku kukuwoneka kuti kwagwira ntchito. Muyenera kungowonetsetsa kuti mwayamba bizinesi iyi ndi cholinga choyenera komanso dongosolo lolimba lomwe lili pafupi. Popanda kuchedwa, tiyeni tiyambe kufufuza momwe tingathetsere banja. Nayi njira 11 zobisika zothetsera ubale:

Kuwerenga Kofanana: Khama Mu Ubwenzi: Tanthauzo Lake Ndi Njira 15 Zowonetsera

1. Kumba dothi

Nanga bwanji tiyambire ndi chinyengo chakale kwambiri m'bukuli chosokoneza munthu ndi bwenzi lake / bwenzi lake? Zidzatengera khama lanu, pokhapokha mutakhala nazo kale. Gwiritsani ntchito chida champhamvu kwambiri chomwe muli nacho - malo ochezera a pa Intaneti. Khalani Sherlock wabwino kwambiri yemwe adakhalapo kwa maola 24 otsatira ndikusanthula zonse zomwe adziwulula za iwo okha mpaka pano.

Mungathenso kulankhula ndi anthu apafupi a munthuyu kapena mnzanu wakale amene angamupatse nthawi yomweyo. Mukapeza umboni wosatsutsika, fotokozani! Kafukufuku wofalitsidwa mu Social Psychological and Personality Science watchula kuti kusweka kwa chikhulupiriro ndi chimodzi mwa zifukwa zomwe zimachititsa kuti musiye chibwenzi. Ngati atagwiritsidwa ntchito molakwika ndikugwiritsidwa ntchito bwino, chinyengochi chingakuthandizeni kukwaniritsa cholinga chanu.

2. Sewerani khadi la 'mukuyenera bwino'

Kodi mwamvapo za FOMO? Ndicho chimene mudzagwiritsa ntchito - kuyambitsa 'mantha osowa' mwa munthu amene mukufuna kumuchotsa muubwenziwu. Gwiritsani ntchito mwayi uliwonse kuwajambula m'maganizo mwawo chithunzi cha ' mnzawo woyenera ' yemwe kwenikweni angalipire zonse zomwe mnzawo wapano akusowa.

Pazifukwa izi, muyenera kuyika mnzake wapanoyu pansi pa maikulosikopu ndikupeza zofooka zawo zazing'ono mpaka zazikulu. Kenako mumawunikira zophophonya izi ndikuzipereka mu mbale ya hyperbolic pazokambirana zilizonse. Chinachake chikanenedwa mobwerezabwereza, timachitenga ngati chowonadi cha uthenga wabwino ndikuchita molingana ndi zomwe tafotokozazi. Ndipo ndicho chinyengo kumbuyo momwe mungathetsere banja.

3. Fotokozani tsiku limene lingakhalepo

Kuti banja lithe, mutha kubweretsa munthu wachitatu pakati pawo. Koka mmodzi wa iwo ndi chisankho chokongola chomwe chingagwedeze maziko a ubale wawo. Tiyeni timve kuchokera kwa owerenga athu, Alicia, wamalonda ku San Jose, za momwe adathetsera banja popanda iwo kudziwa. Ankafuna kuthandiza mnzake wapamtima kusiya chibwenzi choopsa.

Iye anati, "Sindinaone kuti John ali womvetsa chisoni kwambiri ndi mtsikana wa bwanayo. Ndinapitiriza kudikira kuti asiyane ndi chibwenzi chake. Koma anali wakhungu m'chikondi, amalephera kuona zingwe zomwe amamukoka. Anali ngati Emily kwa Ross wake. Ndinadziwa kuti sizidzakhala zovuta kumuswa ngati ndingathe kumubzala bwino. posachedwa Mission yakwaniritsidwa!

Kuwerenga Kofanana: Malangizo 20 Oti Muyandikire Mtsikana Ndi Kupambana Mtima Wake

4. Khalani 'chisankho chabwino'

Tiyerekeze kuti munthu amene mukumufunsayo ndi amene mumamukonda kwambiri. Zikatero, ukhoza kukhala munthu wachitatu amene tinkangonenazi. M’malo modikira kuti aliyense wa iwo ayambitse chisudzulo, mumaloŵa mmenemo modzifunira. Palibe kusewera konyansa. Ingowawonetsani chifukwa chake akuyenera kukhala ndi inu osati munthu winayo.

Apatseni zifukwa zokwanira zokhulupirira kuti ali nanu, akhoza kukhala ndi ubale wachikondi komanso wathanzi komanso kuti ndinu wokonzeka kudzaza mipata yomwe mnzawo sangathe. Sizichitika ngati mungoyang'ana kwambiri pakuwoneka wokongola kapena wodabwitsa. M'malo mwake, yesani kumanga ubale wachikondi ndikukhala nawo pamavuto ndi zovuta. Pamapeto pake, khama lanu lidzapindula.

5. Momwe mungathetsere banja? Gawani ndikugonjetsa

Tikufuna luso lanu lochitapo kanthu pa sitepe iyi. Tiyeni tikupatseni mapu omveka bwino. Nenani, mukuyesera kuthetsa banja popanda iwo kudziwa ndipo mmodzi wa iwo ndi bwenzi lanu. Titha kuganiza kuti muli pafupi nawo. Pezani njira yokhala pafupi ndi okondedwa awo. Cholinga apa ndi kukhala achinsinsi awo. Khalani munthu amene amatembenukirako nthawi zonse muzochitika zilizonse, kaya zabwino kapena zoipa.

Poyamba, mungafunike kuuza ena zambiri zokhudza inuyo kuti muwathandize kulankhulana bwino. Mukangoyamba kucheza bwino, mudzakhala ndi mwayi wodziwa nkhani zawo, mavuto a paubwenzi , anthu okondana nawo mobisa, ndi zina zambiri. Gwiritsani ntchito bwino mfundo zimenezi kuti muwalekanitse kwambiri. Koma kumbukirani kuti muyenera kukhala ndi nkhope yolunjika kuti muwatsimikizire kuti mumawakonda kwambiri.

Kuwerenga Kofanana: Momwe Mungabwezeretsere Wakale Wanu - Ndi Kuwapangitsa Kukhalabe KWAMBIRI

6. Khalani oyambitsa mavuto kusonyeza kuti banja litha

Mukuyang'ana njira zoyipa zothetsa banja? Nanga mungatani kuti mukhale ngati wosokoneza, wovuta pang'ono pakati pa okondana? Mutha kukhala ndi nthawi yochuluka ndi mmodzi wa iwo kotero kuti winayo aganize kuti chinachake chiyenera kuchitika pakati panu. Kuphatikiza apo, zimawapangitsa kuti azikhala kutali kwa nthawi yayitali.

Tiyeni tiwulule njira ina yosunthira mmwamba ngati mukuganiza momwe mungathetsere banja. Fananizani wokondedwa wawo ndi wina woyenera kwambiri. Kapena, mwanzeru, mudzaze maganizo awo ndi kukaikira wina ndi mnzake. Mwachitsanzo, nenani chinachake monga, "Ndikudziwa kuti simunakonzekere ukwati. Koma ndikulankhula ndi mnzanu dzulo ndipo ndinamva kuti akukonzekera kale ukwati."

7. Agwireni akunyenga anzawo

Kodi mungathetse bwanji banja? Njira imodzi yabwino kwambiri yochitira izi ndi ngati mungathe kupeza m'modzi mwa iwo kuti achite zachinyengo ndi mnzake. Kafukufuku akusonyeza kuti kusakhulupirika ndi chimodzi mwa zifukwa zazikulu zisanu zomwe zimapangitsa kuti banja lithe. Tsopano dongosololi likhoza kugwira ntchito bwino ngati pali kale vuto linalake muubwenzi wawo. Nyambo yanu idzagwetsa msomali womaliza.

Masiku ano pamene anthu akuchita chibwenzi pa intaneti , kuyika msampha wachikondi si nkhani yaikulu. Pangani ubale wabodza pa intaneti pa malo ochezera a pa Intaneti kapena pulogalamu yopezera chibwenzi (ngati mukudziwa kuti munthuyo amapezeka mwachinsinsi pa pulogalamuyo). Yambani kucheza ndikuyesera kutseka chibwenzi mwachangu momwe mungathere. Pa D-Day, fikani pamalopo ndi mnzanu (kapena wokondedwa wanu) ndipo muwalole kuti aone mtundu wa munthu amene akumufuna. Kapena nthawi zonse mutha kugawana zithunzi za machezawo ngati umboni wovomerezeka.

Infographic pa - njira zothetsera banja — Njira zosiyanasiyana zolekanitsira banja kuchokera kwa wina ndi mnzake

8. Kubweza mwamuna wakale ndi njira yachinyengo yothetsa chibwenzi

Ngati mukufuna kuthetsa banja patali, iyi ndiye chinyengo choyenera kwa inu. Zomwe muyenera kuchita ndikukoka mnzanu wakale wakale ndikumugwetsa pazomwe zikuchitika. Ndiye mumakhala pansi ndikupumula ndikuwona momwe zochitika zikuyendera. Zidzakhala chidutswa cha keke kuswa wina ndi bwenzi lake / bwenzi ngati mukudziwa kuti ali ndi mbiri yakale ndi wakale wawo.

Palibe chomwe chimagwira ntchito bwino kuposa malingaliro osasinthika kwa wokonda wakale kuti ubale womwe ulipo upite pamoto. Imbani bwenzi wakale uyu, kapena pezani wina mwa anzawo omwe angawafikire. Mwachisawawa amazengereza kukambirana momwe adalakwitsa kwambiri pakusweka ndipo ayenera kuyesetsa kukonza zinthu. Ngati ndinu wokhoza kutsimikizira anthu, theka la vuto lanu lathetsedwa.

9. Kodi mungapangire bwanji kuti banja lithe? Abweretsere nsanje

Ndikhulupirireni, nsanje ndi poizoni kwambiri moti ingakhudze kwambiri anthu abwino kwambiri. Musadandaule kwambiri za momwe mungathetsere banja ndikutsatira njira yakale iyi. Ana anali ndi chibwenzi chachikulu ndi mnyamata wina amene anali pachibwenzi . Ana ankadziwa bwino kuti mtsikanayu ankamugwiritsa ntchito kuti apeze magiredi. Kuyembekezera kuti athetse chibwenzi chake kunamukhumudwitsa kwambiri.

Kuwerenga Kofanana: Njira 55 Zapadera Zouzira Munthu Kuti Mumamukonda

Iye ndi gulu lake lachigawenga anakonza zoti akumane naye mwachikondi, makamaka pamaso pa chibwenzi chakecho. Mameseji a Lovey-dovey nthawi ndi nthawi komanso mafoni nthawi ndi nthawi adamupangitsa kukayikira. Monga gawo la ndondomekoyi, atsikanawo ankamumenya poyera paphwando la nyumba. Ndipo kumuwona akuzitenga mopepuka, bwenzi lake silinathe kuyigwiranso. Iwo anali ndi ndewu yaikulu ndipo anathetsa zinthu bwinobwino.

10. Khalani mphamvu zawo ngati ali paubwenzi wankhanza

Kodi mungawapangitse bwanji kuti banja lithe ngati m'modzi wa iwo ali wankhanza kwambiri kapena wopondereza? Muyenera kukhala chithandizo chosalekeza kwa munthu wina. Ngati mumasamala za iwo, athandizeni kuzindikira kuti dziko lakunja kwa ubale wawo wapoizoni ndi malo akulu kwambiri.

Pali mwayi wambiri womwe ukuyembekezera. Pali anthu omwe ali ofunitsitsa kuwathandiza kuthana ndi zoopsa. Musataye mtima mpaka atalimba mokwanira kuti athane ndi mantha awo ndikutuluka muubwenziwu. Kuti mupeze upangiri uliwonse waukadaulo, alangizi aluso komanso odziwa zambiri ochokera ku gulu la akatswiri a Bonobology nthawi zonse amakhala nanu.

11. Mphekesera ndi imodzi mwa njira zoipa kwambiri zothetsa banja

Nthawi zosimidwa zimafuna njira zosimidwa. Ngati njira zina zothetsa banja patali sizinakhale zogwira mtima, iyi ndi njira yanu yomaliza. M'malo mopanga mphekesera zopanda pake zomwe palibe amene angakhulupirire, yesetsani kugulitsa zoona zenizeni za munthu ameneyu. Khalani okoma mtima pamene mukusewera mchitidwe woyipawu kotero kuti gwero la miseche iyi silingachokere kwa inu.

Zolozera Mfungulo

Pezani zinsinsi zamthunzi ndi zabodza za mnzawo ndikuwulula
Auzeni kuti akuyenera kuchita bwino kuposa mnzawo wapano
Dziwitsani munthu wachitatu kapena mubweretsenso mnzanu wakale
Perekani nsanje ndi kukaikira m’maganizo mwa okwatirana ponena za wina ndi mnzake
Kufalitsa mphekesera ndi miseche

Tikukhulupirira kuti takupatsani machenjerero ambiri achinyengo ndipo tsopano mukudziwa bwino momwe mungathetsere banja. Nthawi yomweyo, tikukhumba kuti njira zosalungamazi zisagwiritsidwe ntchito pothandiza njira yobwezera ya munthu wina. Kafukufuku amene tamutchula kale akulankhula za makhalidwe ena amdima a anthu olowerera monga kudzikuza, Machiavellianism, psychopathy, ndi sadism, ndipo sitikufuna kuti owerenga athu ayang'ane chilichonse mwa izi.

Malingana ngati zolinga zanu zili zoyera, Bonobology ndiyothandiza. Ngati mumafuna kuwalekanitsa chifukwa mukukondana ndi mmodzi wa iwo, musathamangire kusuntha mukangotha. Pitirizani ndikugwira dzanja lawo paulendo wonse wamachiritso koma apatseni mpata wokwanira komanso nthawi yoti athetse malingaliro awo.

Kapena mwina anali mnzanu amene munkafuna kumupulumutsa ku chibwenzi chomwe sichinali bwino . Mungadziimbe mlandu nokha chifukwa chowapweteka kwambiri. Koma taganizirani za chithunzi chachikulu; munawachitiradi zabwino. Tsopano chomwe akufunikira ndi chikondi chanu ndi chithandizo chanu. Popeza ndinu bwenzi labwino kwambiri, tikutsimikiza kuti mudzawasamalira. Zabwino zonse!

Ibibazo

1. Ndi chiyani chomwe chimasokoneza ubale mosavuta?

Mabodza ali ndi mphamvu yothetsa ubale mosavuta. Ngati mukuyesera kulowetsa banja muvuto, yang'anani zinsinsi zazikulu zilizonse kapena chowonadi cholimba chomwe amabisirana. Mukaponya bomba, zimangoyambitsa mafunso ambiri omwe amatsogolera ku ndewu zoyipa zomwe zitha kuthetsa ubalewo.

2. Kodi mumathetsa bwanji ubale wa munthu?

Kuchititsa kukaikira ndi nsanje m’maganizo mwa okwatirana ndi imodzi mwa njira zabwino kwambiri zowonongera ubwenzi wa munthu. Mutha kuwatsimikizira kuti akuyenera kukhala ndi mnzanu yemwe angawachitire bwino. Pambuyo pake, adziŵitseni aŵiriwo kwa anthu ongofuna kukhala okwatirana nawo amene angagwirizane nawo. Kubwezeretsanso bwenzi lakale pachithunzipa kumathandizanso kusokoneza ubale.

Njira 31 Zoseketsa Zoyambira Kukambirana ndi Mameseji Ndikupeza Mayankho!

Momwe Mungapangire Mkazi Winayo Kuchoka - Malangizo 9 Oyesedwa Ndi Kuyesedwa

Momwe Mungalimbanire Ndi Bwenzi Lanu Amene Amakupangitsani Kukhala Osatetezeka

Chopereka chanu sichikutanthauza chopereka chachifundo . Chidzalola Bonobology kupitiliza kukubweretserani chidziwitso chatsopano komanso chaposachedwa poyesetsa kuthandiza aliyense padziko lonse lapansi kuphunzira momwe angachitire chilichonse.