Zikafika pankhani zapamtima, malamulo ena sangakambirane m'zikhalidwe ndi mayiko. Mwachitsanzo, kubera kapena kusakhulupirika kumaonedwa kuti ndi chimodzi mwa zolakwika zaubwenzi zomwe munthu angachite. Komabe, ngakhale kuti chifundo chimakhala ndi munthu amene akuberedwa, ndi ochepa chabe amene amalankhula za gudumu lachitatu muubwenzi ndi zotsatira zamaganizo za kukhala mkazi winayo panthawi yachinyengo.
Tinafunsa Sushma Perla , mphunzitsi wa NLP, komanso mlangizi kuti atithandize kumvetsa bwino momwe mkazi winayo amaonera. Kodi ndi malangizo ati amomwe mungathanirane ndi vuto la kukhala mbuye? Kodi mlandu wochita zachinyengo umatha? Nayi zomwe akunena, "Chowonadi ndi chakuti palibe amene angaweruze zomwe zimachitika muukwati. Nchifukwa chiyani mwamuna wodzipereka amagwa mchikondi ndi munthu wina ndipo kusweka mtima kwenikweni kwa kukhala mbuye kumamveka bwanji? Mwina ukwati unali utalephera kale ndipo mbuyeyo akuchitiridwa zoipa popanda chifukwa. Mfundo ndi yakuti, nthawi zambiri zinthu izi zimakhala zovuta kwambiri kuposa momwe tikuganizira," Tiyeni timvetse nkhaniyi mwatsatanetsatane.
Kodi Kukhala Mkazi Wina Kumakhala Chiyani?
M'ndandanda wazopezekamo
“Kuyambira kalekale, mawu akuti ‘mkazi wina’ akhala akunyozedwa ndi kunyozedwa,” akutero Sushma. “Palibe kukambirana kwakukulu pankhani yothana ndi kusweka mtima chifukwa chokhala mbuye kapena momwe mkazi winayo amamvera. Ndipo kumbukirani, nthawi zambiri zimatha kuwononga kwambiri thanzi la maganizo ndi la maganizo la mkazi.”
Tengani mwachitsanzo imodzi mwamakona atatu odziwika bwino achikondi m'mbiri yaposachedwa - ukwati woyipa wa Lady Diana ndi Prince Charles komanso kupezeka kwa mkazi wake wapano Camilla mu equation. "Panali anthu atatu muukwati uwu" anali mawu odziwika bwino a Diana m'mafunso omwe akunenedwa ngakhale lero.
Koma ngakhale Diana adakopa mitima ya mamiliyoni padziko lonse lapansi ngati mwana wamfumu wowawa, Camilla adawonetsedwa m'mabuku ambiri, zolemba, ndi makanema osasangalatsa. Dziko limangoganiza kuti mkazi winayo ndiye woipa m'nkhaniyi. Sitiima n’kumadzifunsa kuti, “Kodi mkazi winayo amamva bwanji mkaziyo atadziwa n’kunena kuti (mkaziyo) ndi wowononga nyumba?”
Susanne, mkulu wa zamalonda wazaka 39 yemwe adakondana ndi mwamuna wokwatira , adagawana maganizo ake pankhaniyi. "Ndinali ndikukumana ndi nthawi yovuta pamene adabwera m'moyo wanga. Ndinkadziwa kuti anali wodzipereka koma nthawi zonse ankawonetsa ukwati wake ngati wosayenda bwino. Sindinkadziwa kuti anali kupotoza chowonadi mosavuta. Pamapeto pake ndinazindikira kuti ndine mkazi wina muubwenzi ndipo sakundionanso kwambiri. Pamapeto pake, amakonda mkazi wake ."
“Podzafika nthaŵi imene ndinazindikira bwino lomwe chimene ndinadziloŵetsamo, ndinali kale wokhudzidwa kwambiri.” Inde, ndinali m’chikondi ndipo ndinali kuweruzidwa ndi aliyense mosalekeza.Ubwenziwo unasokonekera. Pamene mwamuna wokwatira achoka kwa mbuye wake, ‘amakhululukidwa’ ndi mkazi wake, ndipo mbuyeyo amakhala wopanda kanthu koma mbiri yoipitsidwa. kupembedza kwa zaka zambiri chifukwa cha chikondi,” akuwonjezera motero Susanne.
M’zochitika zambiri monga za Susanne, kupwetekedwa mtima kokhala mkazi winayo kumakhala kowawa mofananamo, kapenanso kuipiraipira, kuposa kuperekedwa kwa mkaziyo. Kupsyinjika kungakhale kosiyana kwa amayi onse koma palibe vuto lomwe silimapweteka kwambiri. Tiyeni timvetsetse psychology ya kukhala mayi mwatsatanetsatane.
20 Zotsatira Zamaganizo Za Kukhala Mkazi Winayo
Nthawi zambiri za kusakhulupirika, munthu amene amalandira chilango choipa kwambiri ndi mkazi amene amakonda mwamuna wodzipereka. (Chodabwitsa n'chakuti mwamunayo amangotaya mtima mosavuta, ngakhale kuti ndiye amene ananyenga. Koma imeneyo ndi nkhani ina yonse). M'malingaliro otchuka, makhalidwe a mkazi winayo ndi achilendo kwambiri. Amawonetsedwa ngati wodzikonda, wosowa, wokakamira, komanso wosaganizira za malingaliro a mkazi.
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Ndipotu, mkaziyo ayenera kupirira mawu onyoza ndi mawu onyoza poyembekezera kuti tsiku lina mwamuna wake adzamasuka muukwati wake wosasangalatsa ndikusankha iye. Koma kachiwiri, kusatsimikiza za chiyembekezo ichi sikungamulole kugona usiku. Umu ndi momwe kukhala mnzanu 'wosaloledwa' kumakhudzira mkazi:
1. Kulakwa ndi kwakukulu
Sushma anati: “Chimodzi mwa zinthu zimene zimachititsa kuti munthu asamavutike kwambiri ndi mkazi winayo ndi kudziimba mlandu. Ngati ndinu munthu wokhudzidwa mtima komanso wokhudzidwa mtima, kudziimba mlandu n’kukhulupirira kuti ndinu nokha amene mwachititsa kuti banja lithe kungakukhudzeni kwambiri.”
Ndiye, kodi kukhala pachibwenzi ndi mwamuna wokwatira kumakupangitsani kumva bwanji? Nkhawa. Kudziimba mlandu. Mosakayikira. Ndi nkhondo yosatha pakati pa mdierekezi ndi mngelo atakhala pa phewa lako. Pomwe mzimu umodzi umakukumbutsani kuti 'chilichonse ndichabwino m'chikondi ndi nkhondo', winayo amakutchani kuti ndinu woipa.
Kudzimva kuti ndinu wolakwa sikudzakulolani kusangalala ndi chikondi choyamba muubwenzi monga momwe ziyenera kukhalira. Nthawi zonse padzakhala kumverera kovutitsa kuti anthu, anzanu, ndi abale anu sadzavomereza ubalewo mokwanira, ngakhale atakuthandizani. Komanso, mudzafuna kukhalabe okana za momwe chibwenzi chanu cha nthawi yayitali chidzakhudzire mkazi kapena banja lanu, zomwe mosadziwa zingawonjezere kudzimva wolakwa.
2. Masewera amalingaliro amatha kukutopetsani
Poyamba, chisangalalo cha chikondi choletsedwa chingaoneke chokopa kwambiri, ndipo mwina yankho lanu ndi lakuti, “N’chifukwa chiyani ndili wokonzeka kukhala mkazi wina?” Chisangalalo cha chiyeso ndi chinsinsi ndicho phindu lokhalo m’makonzedwe otere. Kumva kufulumira kumeneko kumakufikirani koma chisangalalocho chikatha ndipo mavuto enieni akabuka, chinyengo ndi mabodza ofunikira kuti ubale upitirire zingakhale zotopetsa.
Mwamunayo adzayenera kunama nthawi zonse - kwa banja lake kapena kwa inu ndipo mudzayambanso kusakonda izi pakapita nthawi. Grace akufotokoza chifukwa chake anayenera kusiya. “Sindinkadziwa ngati ankandiona kuti ndine wofunika kwambiri, kapena ngati analidi ndi chibwenzi chathu.” Ankanena kuti ndine wapadera, koma sindinkaona kuti n’kofunika kwambiri kuposa ineyo.
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3. Mutha kukhala ndi nkhani zodalirika
Mukakhala pachibwenzi ndi mwamuna wokwatira kapena wodzipereka, mumadziwa kuti muyenera kusunga chinsinsi, zivute zitani. Izi zingayambitse mavuto okhudzana ndi kudalirana chifukwa nthawi zonse mumayang'ana mopitirira muyeso. Kodi mudzapezeka naye? Kodi pali amene angadziwe mu ofesi kuti ndinu ofanana? Kodi nthawi zonse mudzadziwika ndi makhalidwe abwino a mkazi wina amene ali pachibwenzi?
Pomaliza, funso lofunika kwambiri limabwera. Kodi mungakhulupirire mwamuna wanu? Mudzadzifunsabe ngati akukhala ndi mkazi wake pamene sali ndi inu (mwayi, ali). Mungayambe kuchita nsanje ngakhale mumadziwa bwino za kukhalapo kwa 'mkazi' pa chithunzicho.
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4. Mumaopa chiweruzo chanu
Iwalani kudalira ena, nthawi zambiri mumayamba kukayikira chiweruzo chanu ndikudzidalira nokha kuti mupange zisankho zoyenera ndipo ndicho chimapangitsa kukhala mkazi wina kukhala wosiyana. Sushma akusimba nkhani ya kasitomala yemwe adakhudzidwa kwambiri atakhala mkazi wina kwa zaka zambiri kenako n’kumusiya. “Anapereka zonse ndipo anadikira kwa zaka zambiri akuyembekeza kuti ubalewo ukhale wovomerezeka .”
"Mwatsoka, mwamuna wake anasankha mkazi wake kuposa iye ngakhale maganizo ake osatsutsika kwa iye. Zinali zopweteka kwambiri ndipo iye anavomereza kwa ine kuti iye anadzudzula kusowa kwake kulingalira bwino chifukwa cha udindo umene iye anadzipeza alimo. Pamene mwamuna wokwatiwa achoka kwa mbuye wake, izo zingayambitse zopweteka zambiri kwa iye "iye akutero. Nthawi zambiri kusweka mtima kwa mkazi winayo kumatha kwa nthawi yayitali. Chifukwa chake, machiritso atakhala mkazi winayo amathanso kutenga nthawi ndipo palibe njira yowongoka. Mungazengereze kupempha thandizo chifukwa cha manyazi, ndipo ngakhale pamene mutero, mukhoza kulandira chiweruzo ndi udani m’malo mwa chifundo.
5. Chitsenderezo cha chinsinsi chikhoza kukhala chokhumudwitsa
Kupanikizika kosalekeza kokhala ndi ubale wachinsinsi kungakhale chimodzi mwa zotsatira zoopsa kwambiri zamaganizo zomwe zimakhalapo chifukwa chokhala mkazi wina.
- Malo anu ochezera a pa TV akhoza kufuula osakwatiwa pamene zoona ndi zoti simuli
- Simungawonekere pagulu komanso simungathe kuchita zinthu zina zomwe maanja amachita nthawi zonse
- Muyenera kupanga zifukwa pamene mnzanu kapena wachibale akuyesera kuti muyambe kukambirana ndi wina
Atafunsidwa mmene zimakhalira kukhala mkazi winayo, woŵerenga wina dzina lake Sophia (dzina losinthidwa) anatiuza kuti: “Kunena zoona, sindidzimvanso ngati ine ndekha.
Kodi mkazi winayo amamva bwanji ndi mkazi wake? Anthu amaganiza kuti alibe chidwi ndi momwe mkaziyo akumvera koma izi siziri zoona. Nthaŵi zambiri, akazi amene ali m’mikhalidwe yoteroyo amamva liwongo kwambiri polingalira za mkazi ndi banja limene lingavulale chifukwa cha iye. Ndiyeno pali vuto lalikulu limeneli simunaone likubwera. Matchuthi anu, tchuthi, ndi zochitika zina zabwinobwino nthawi zonse ziyenera kusangalatsidwa mwachinsinsi ndi mwamuna wanu. Pamakhalidwe komanso pawailesi yakanema, mungafunike kumangowona zithunzi za iye ali ndi banja lake. Zitha kukhala zowononga moyo wonse.
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6. Kuleza mtima kwanu kungathe
Mudzaphunziradi kukhala oleza mtima pankhani yokhala ndi chibwenzi ndi mwamuna wokwatira kapena wodzipereka . Zinthu zitha kukhala zosiyana ngati si chibwenzi cha nthawi yayitali koma kungogonana kamodzi kokha, koma ngati mulowa pachibwenzi ndi mwamuna wokwatira akuyembekeza kuti asudzula mkazi wake kapena kusiya mwamuna wake wodzipereka, kudikira kudzatenga nthawi yayitali.
Makamaka ngati mwamunayo ali ndi nyumba ndi ana ndi mkazi wake, iye sangakhoze kuwalekeratu. Chifukwa cha ana, ayenera kumamatira. Maubale ozama si ophweka kusweka kotero muyenera kungotenga nthawi yanu. Koma mpaka liti?
Chloe (dzina lasinthidwa), mtolankhani wochokera ku New Delhi adatiuza kuti, "Ndine mkazi wina yemwe ali pachibwenzi koma ndatopa ndikukhala choncho. Zimandidetsa nkhawa nthawi zonse ndikudikirira kuti chibwenzi changa chisiye mkazi wake ndikukhala ndi ine moyo wake wonse zimangowoneka ngati maloto akutali omwe sangakwaniritsidwe. Nthawi zambiri amandiuza kuti amusiya koma amangomufunsabe usiku womwe ndimamuganizira. akhoza kukhalanso moyo wotero.”
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7. Kukhoza kukhetsa maganizo ndi thupi
Chimodzi mwazotsatira zamalingaliro akukhala mkazi wina ndikuti kudziimba mlandu, kukakamizidwa, ndi kusatetezeka kumatha kuwononga thupi ndi malingaliro. Mwinanso mungakwiyire munthu amene mumamuonayo kapena mwina mungadzikwiyire.
"Chifukwa chimodzi chachikulu chokwiyira ndichakuti simungapeze chithandizo chokwanira pa zochita zanu. Chiwerengero cha zinthu zomwe zimasanduka ubale wa nthawi yayitali kapena ukwati watsopano ndi chochepa kwambiri. Zibwenzi zakunja kwa ukwati kwa moyo wonse sizimapezeka kawirikawiri, ndichifukwa chake palibe phindu lililonse kukhala mkazi wina," akutero Sushma. "Zili ngati kulowa mu masewera podziwa kuti mudzakhala otayika. Pokhapokha mutadziwa bwino zolinga zanu, ubale woterewu udzakutopetsani ndipo ndi momwe zimakhalira kukhala mkazi wina."
8. Zimakhudza kudzidalira kwanu komanso kudzidalira kwanu
Mukudziwa kuti ndinu chinsinsi chake chaching'ono, chomwe mwina ngakhale iye amadziimba mlandu kwambiri. Ziribe kanthu zomwe amakumverani, kumapeto kwa tsiku, adzayesa kusunga chithunzi chake pamaso pa anthu ndikuika patsogolo banja lake. Pamene mukulephera kaŵirikaŵiri kumsonkhezera kuchoka muukwati, mudzayamba kudzikayikira.
Mbali yodziwika bwino ya maganizo a munthu amene ali ndi chibwenzi ndi kuchepa pang'onopang'ono kwa kudzidalira. Monga tanenera kale, nthawi iliyonse yomwe chibwenzi chimapezeka , ndi mnzanu amene amalandira cholakwika chachikulu. Mungayesere kunyoza koma kudzudzulidwa nthawi zonse (osatchula nkhani yochititsa manyazi ndi miseche yomwe imayambitsa m'magulu a anthu) kungakhudze kudzidalira kwanu m'mbali zina za moyo. Zingakhudze ntchito yanu ndi kudzidalira kwanu.
9. Mungadzimve kukhala osungulumwa
Kukhala mkazi wina kungakupangitseni kudzipatula. Kubisala kwa ubale ndi kuopa kuweruzidwa kumakulepheretsani kuuza anzanu kapena abale anu zakukhosi, zomwe zimakupangitsani kumva kuti ndinu nokha. Mungayambenso kupewa zochitika za anthu ena kuti mupewe mafunso kapena kukayikira. Kudzipatula kumeneku kungakhudze kwambiri thanzi lanu la maganizo komanso kudzimva kuti ndinu m'modzi mwa anthu omwe mumawakonda.
Amelia, mphunzitsi, anati: “Sindinathe kulankhula ndi anzanga kapena achibale za unansiwo.
10. Mutha kuyamba kumudalira kwambiri
Ngati muli ndi njira zochepa zotulutsira malingaliro anu, mungayambe kudalira mnzanu wanu kuti akuthandizeni pamalingaliro. Kudalira kumeneku kungapangitse mphamvu zanu kukhala zosafunikira , pomwe chisangalalo chanu chimadalira kupezeka kwake ndi chisamaliro chake. Pakapita nthawi, kusalingana kumeneku kungakupangitseni kumva kuti mulibe mphamvu komanso kuti mwagwidwa. Hannah, katswiri wojambula zithunzi, akufotokoza kuti, "Ndinadalira iye m'maganizo chifukwa ndiye yekhayo amene ankadziwa nkhani yonse. Koma kudalira kumeneko kunandipangitsa kumva kuti ndine wopanda mphamvu komanso wogwidwa."
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11. Mutha kukhala ndi nkhawa
Kupanikizika kosalekeza kwa kusunga ubale wachinsinsi, kuphatikizapo kusatsimikizika kwa tsogolo lake, kungayambitse nkhawa yosatha. Kuda nkhawa kuti apezeka kapena kuganiza mopambanitsa zochita zake kungayambitse kusagona tulo komanso zizindikiro zakuthupi monga mutu kapena kutopa. Kathy akufotokoza mmene chinsinsicho chinabweretsera kuzunzika kosalekeza. "Ndinkachita mantha nthawi iliyonse pamene foni yanga ikulira, ndikuganiza kuti mwina ndi mkazi wake watulukira chibwenzi."
12. Mutha kuyika manyazi
Chigamulo cha anthu nthawi zambiri chimakhala chovuta kwambiri kwa mkazi wina, ndipo pakapita nthawi, mungayambe kukhulupirira malingaliro oipa okhudza inu nokha. Manyazi amkati awa angachepetse kudzidalira kwanu ndikupangitsa kuti zikhale zovuta kudziona bwino. Margaret, yemwe kale anali pachibwenzi ndi mwamuna wokwatira, akuvomereza kuti, "Chigamulo cha anthu chinalowa m'maganizo mwanga. Ndinayamba kukhulupirira kuti ndine woipa, ngakhale nditadziwa kuti ubalewo sunali wolakwa wanga."
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13. Zolinga zanu zaumwini zingakhale zovuta
Kuganizira kwambiri za ubale womwe umakupangitsani kukhala wotopetsa komanso wowononga nthawi ndi mphamvu zanu kungakupangitseni kunyalanyaza zolinga zanu ndi kukula kwanu. Mungadzipeze mukutaya mwayi wanu kapena wantchito, zomwe zingayambitse chisoni pambuyo pake. Madison akuvomereza kuti, "Ndinakana kukwezedwa pantchito kuti ndikhale mumzinda womwewo ndi iye. Pokumbukira m'mbuyo, ndinadzipereka kwambiri chifukwa cha munthu amene sankapereka zambiri."
14. Mutha kulimbana ndi maubwenzi amtsogolo
Kukhala mkazi wina kungayambitse mavuto okhalitsa okhudzana ndi kudalirana komanso mavuto amalingaliro omwe amapitirira muubwenzi wamtsogolo. Zingakhale zovuta kudalira kapena kutsegula mtima kwa mnzanu watsopano, poopa kubwereza zomwe zidachitika kale. Ava akunena kuti, "Nditachoka muubwenzi , ndinapeza zovuta kudalira aliyense watsopano. Ndinkaganiza kuti mwamuna aliyense angandibisire kena kake."
15. Makhalidwe anu angatsutsidwe
Kukhala pachibwenzi ndi mwamuna wokwatira kaŵirikaŵiri kumasemphana ndi miyezo yaumwini kapena ya anthu. Kulimbana ndi mfundozi kungayambitse mkangano waukulu wamkati, pamene mukuyesera kugwirizanitsa zochita zanu ndi zikhulupiriro zanu. Natalia anati: “Nthawi zonse ndinkadziimba mlandu ndipo ndinkaona ngati ndikuphwanya mfundo zanga.
16. Mungayambe kuopa kudzipereka
Kusakhazikika ndi kusadzipereka muubwenzi kungapangitse malingaliro anu pa chikondi ndi mgwirizano. Mungayambe kugwirizanitsa maubwenzi ndi kusatsimikizika ndi kusakhulupirika, zomwe zimapangitsa kuti zikhale zovuta kudzipereka kwa wina watsopano.
Kwa Riley, kusadzipereka muubwenzi wake wakale kunamupangitsa kuti ayambenso kukayikira zoyambanso kukhala pachibwenzi chenicheni. "Sindingathe kusiya mantha oti ndingavulazidwe mwanjira yomweyo."
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17. Mutha kuganiza bwino za ubale
Chinsinsi ndi chisangalalo cha ubalewu ukhoza kuupangitsa kukhala wapadera kuposa momwe uliri. Kukonzekera uku kungakupangitseni kukhala otanganidwa kwambiri, ngakhale ubalewo utakhala wopanda thanzi. Shawna akuvomereza kuti, “Ndinamamatira ku lingaliro la ‘chomwe chingakhale’ m’malo moyang’anizana ndi zenizeni za ‘chomwe chiri. Zinandipangitsa kuti ndikhalebe m’maganizo kwa nthawi yaitali.”
18. Mutha kukumana ndi mavuto azachuma
Ngati mupereka ndalama zambiri kuti ubale wanu upitirire kapena kuti mubwezeretsedwe, zingayambitse mavuto azachuma . Kulipira ndalama zobisika kapena kuphimba ndalama kuti mupewe kukayikira kungakuwonongereni ndalama. Charlotte akunena kuti, "Ndinathera nthawi yambiri ndikugwiritsa ntchito maulendo achinsinsi ndi mphatso kuti ubale wanu upitirire. Pamapeto pake, zinandiwonongera ndalama zomwe ndinasunga ndipo zinandipangitsa kumva ngati wopusa."
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19. Zotsatira za mabwenzi amtsogolo
Kukhala mkazi wina sikumangokhudza maubwenzi anu achikondi; zingakhudzenso mabwenzi anu. Kubisala ndi kudziimba mlandu nthawi zambiri kumabweretsa kudzipatula, zomwe zimapangitsa kuti zikhale zovuta kusunga maubwenzi enieni. Kuonjezera apo, abwenzi omwe azindikira kuti muli nawo paubwenzi woterowo akhoza kukuweruzani, zomwe zimabweretsa kusweka kapena kusweka.
Mwachitsanzo, ganizirani nkhani ya Beverly. “Mnzanga wapamtima atadziwa za chibwenzi changa, anasiya kundilankhula. Anati sangandithandize kusankha zinthu, ndipo zimenezo zinandipweteka kwambiri kuposa momwe ndimaganizira,” akukumbukira Beverly. Patapita nthawi, anazindikira kuti amaona kuti kuona mtima ndi kugwirizana ndi mabwenzi n’kofunika kwambiri. “Ndinagwira ntchito mwakhama kuti ndikonzenso gulu langa la anthu omwe anandithandiza kukula, ndipo ndinaphunzira kuika patsogolo kulankhulana momasuka .”
Kukonza ndi kulimbikitsa maubwenzi pambuyo pazochitika zotere kumafuna chiwopsezo ndi khama, koma ndi sitepe yofunikira pakupita patsogolo ndikulimbikitsa njira yothandizira yomwe imakukwezani.
20. Mutha kutuluka mwamphamvu pambuyo Pomaliza
Inde, ichi ndi chinthu chimodzi chomwe ndi chowonadi komanso chofunikira kudziwa za maganizo a munthu amene ali ndi chibwenzi. Chifukwa chake ngati wina akufunsa zabwino zokhala mkazi wina, mwina ichi ndi chokhacho. Zingamveke zachilendo koma chimodzi mwa zotsatira zabwino zokhala mkazi wina pachibwenzi ndichakuti ngati muchita bwino zomwe mukuyembekezera , zingakupangitseni kukhala olimba. Koma mfundo yaikulu ndi yakuti muyenera kukhala ndi malingaliro enieni pankhaniyi, chomwe ndi chinthu chovuta kwambiri kuchita. Sulochana J (dzina lasinthidwa), katswiri wa zamafoni, anali pachibwenzi ndi mwamuna wokwatira ndipo akuti chinamusintha kukhala wabwino.
"Ubwino woyambitsa chibwenzi ngati mkazi wina ndikuti umayamba ndi zolakwika poyamba. Ndinkadziwa kuti mnyamata yemwe ndimamuwona anali wachinyengo. Ndinaphunziranso kusunga zoyembekezera zanga kuchokera ku chiyanjano chochepa kwambiri kotero ndimayang'ana kwambiri nthawi zosangalatsa ndi iye. Ndinkadziwa kuti sangandipatse kudzipereka komwe kunali koyenera. Choncho ndinkaziona ngati ubale wamba. Komanso, ndikanatha kukhala woona mtima kwa iye - kuposa wina aliyense - chifukwa amandidziwa, chifukwa amandidziwa.
Kodi Mumatani Ndi Kukhala Mkazi Winayo?
Mmawa wina mukudzuka ndipo mwaganiza kuti nthawi yakwana yoti musiye kukhala mkazi wina. 'N'chifukwa chiyani ndili bwino kukhala mkazi wina? Ndakwanira! Ndiyenera zabwino kuposa izi,' mukunena pamene mukudzuka pabedi. Mukudziwa kuti simukuyenera kuyika thanzi lanu la maganizo pamavuto amisala. Ndiye njira yabwino yoyambira kuchira ndikuthetsa chibwenzi cha nthawi yayitali ndi iti?
M’mikhalidwe yoipitsitsa, pamene chibwenzi chonga ichi chikutha momvetsa chisoni, mkazi winayo kaŵirikaŵiri amasoŵa chichirikizo ndi chikondi kuchokera kwa bwenzi lake ndi anthu onse. Pakhoza kukhala zochitika pamene akuyenera kukweza masokosi ake ndikuyenda patsogolo molimba mtima yekha. Nazi njira zina zopangira kuti kuyenda kukhale kosavuta:
1. Osadzichitira nkhanza
Sushma akuti lamulo loyamba la machiritso ndikudzichitira chifundo. “Tinene zoona, mudzaweruzidwa ndi dziko, choncho musaonjezere nkhaniyo, kumbukirani kuti simuli mbali ya chibwenzi, ndinu munthu woyenerera kukondedwa ndipo chilichonse chimene munachita chinali mbali ya ulendowo,” akuwonjezera motero.
Kuwerenga Kofanana: Zoyenera Kuchita Mwamuna Wanu Akamalankhula ndi Mkazi Wina
2. Pumulani, mukuyenera
Olivia akuwulula kuti atathetsa chibwenzi chake chokwatiwa, chinthu choyamba chomwe adachita chinali kupuma kwathunthu kuntchito ndi moyo wake. " Ndinkafuna nthawi yoti ndiganizire mozama, chifukwa zonsezi zinali zopweteka kwambiri kwa ine. Chibwenzi chonsecho ndi mapeto ake zinali zokhumudwitsa kwambiri kotero njira yokhayo yodzipatula inali kungothawa zonsezi kwakanthawi," akutero.
3. Funsani uphungu
Mavuto a ubale wovuta (ndi kusweka mtima kwa mkazi winayo) amatha kukhala ovuta kwambiri. Mungafunike thandizo kuti mudutse gawo lovutali la moyo wanu. Ndipo apa ndipamene uphungu ungathe kuchitapo kanthu pakuchiritsa atakhala mkazi winayo.
Kaya anthu okuzungulirani akukumverani chisoni chotani, aliyense amene sanayendepo mtunda umodzi, sangamvetse zomwe mukukumana nazo. Ichi ndichifukwa chake thandizo la akatswiri lingakhale mpulumutsi amene mukufunikira kuti muthane ndi vutoli. Ngati mukuvutika ndi malingaliro anu, alangizi aluso komanso odziwa zambiri omwe ali pa gulu la uphungu wa Bonobology ali pano kuti akuthandizeni.
4. Chotsani chidwi kuchokera kwa iye kupita kwa inu
Ngati mukuona kuti simungathe kusiya wokondedwa wanu wokwatiwa kapena 'wokwatiwa', n'zotheka kuti iyeyo amayambitsa malingaliro kapena malingaliro ena mkati mwanu. Mwina izi ziyenera kukuwonetsani kuti si munthuyo koma malingaliro omwe mumawakonda kwambiri. Ganizirani nokha ndi zomwe muyenera kuchita kuti mukwaniritse zosowa zanu zamaganizo kuchokera kwina. Muyenera kudzikonda nokha kuti muchiritse ululu wokhala mkazi wina.
5. Funafunani chikondi chenicheni
Mukasokoneza sewero chifukwa cha chikondi, mudzakhala okhumudwa nthawi zonse. Vomerezani kuti chimodzi mwamakhalidwe akukhala 'mkazi wina' ndikuti mumakhala ndi chizolowezi chokopeka ndi sewero. M'malo mwake, dziwani kuti muyenera kudzipatsa mwayi wopeza ubale weniweni komwe mumapeza zonse zomwe muyenera.
Zolozera Mfungulo
- Kukhala mkazi wina nthawi zambiri kumabweretsa kudziimba mlandu kwambiri, kutopa m'malingaliro, ndi nkhani zokhulupirira, zomwe zimakhudza thanzi labwino komanso kudzizindikira.
- Kubisa chinsinsi ndi kusalidwa ndi anthu kungachititse kuti anthu azipatukana ndi mabwenzi ndi achibale, zomwe zimawonjezera kusungulumwa ndi manyazi.
- Kukhazikika kwa ubale komanso kusazindikira nthawi zambiri kumayambitsa kudzidalira komanso kudzidalira, zomwe zimapangitsa kuchira kukhala kovuta.
- Kuyenda mobisa ndi chinyengo kumabweretsa zovuta osati pa maubwenzi okondana okha komanso m'mabwenzi, zomwe zimatsogolera kusweka kapena kusweka kwa maubwenzi.
- Zotsatira zamaganizidwe, monga kuopa kudzipereka ndi nkhawa, zitha kukhala ndi chiyambukiro chosatha pa ubale wamtsogolo komanso kukula kwamunthu.
- Ngakhale pali zovuta, amayi ambiri amatuluka amphamvu komanso odziwa zambiri, pogwiritsa ntchito zochitikazo ngati mwala wopita patsogolo ndikumanganso miyoyo yawo.
Maganizo Final
Kukhala pachibwenzi ndi mwamuna wokwatira kumadzitsegulirani ku zowawa zambiri zamaganizo chifukwa cha zovuta kwambiri. Ngakhale mutadziwa bwino za zovuta zomwe zimakopeka ndi amuna odzipereka, kupitako kumakhala kovuta pambuyo pa mfundo. Funso lomwe muyenera kudzifunsa ndilakuti: Kodi mwakonzeka ndipo ndiyenera?
Chopereka chanu sichikutanthauza chopereka chachifundo . Chidzalola Bonobology kupitiliza kukubweretserani chidziwitso chatsopano komanso chaposachedwa poyesetsa kuthandiza aliyense padziko lonse lapansi kuphunzira momwe angachitire chilichonse.
