Is being a tease the secret to winning a man?

It’s not always serious business

Not to generalise but men do love when you tease them. It is not about the playful aspect of it but rather it’s their thirst for curiosity. They like engaging with things that they are aware of (read: human psychology). Emotional outreach is just valid as long as you can connect with the other person in a very coherent way. The man will always look out for small surprises, trivial, yet intriguing for them to apprehend further. Being a tease can slither your way into a man’s heart but it definitely is not the only way. A man likes to be a bit less uptight and if he is not, then he is still not comfortable enough to unleash the wave of his childishness. Yes, we are all kids at heart after all. And remember how we used to play all the time as kids, but we couldn’t any more as we grew up? This is where you get to play, and for you the possibilities of being creative are endless.

But how can you possibly be a tease?

People like to associate “tease” with something very sexual. While this is not entirely false, being a tease in bed might be a bit different from being a tease on an emotional scale, both being extremely relevant in respective cases.

You flirt with subtlety and make it feel more rewarding

Flirting is as healthy as having avocado spread on toast.
It just takes a bit of your creativity and the right time to initiate the flirting protocol. Learn about his favourite things, make subtle jokes about them while drawing a parallel between him and those things. It is mostly just you validating him on several occasions, but validating a man is as effective as serving him a plate full of steak, unless he is vegan, of course. Make it rewarding for him too and hold yourself back a bit, since if it gets a bit too easy, he’ll get used to the patter. Keep changing the pattern periodically and you’ll just do fine.

Pro Tip: Don’t think of it as a job, you might end up making an awful lot of bad puns.

Be very casual about it, but not too casual

Guys have a weird sense of humour when they are around their “guy” group.

Jokes and being playful will definitely help you be frank with him, but you don’t really want that. Being comfortable means that you are falling into the linear narrative of things. But you can still make him more responsive with indirect validations from you. If you validate him enough, he’ll open up, but the moment he opens up, be very sceptical about the things he talks about. They might even talk about video games or about a movie they saw some weeks back, just nod and be appreciative in general, but not too intrigued, because that would show that you genuinely want to know about these things he was talking about. Tread carefully during this time and make him feel a bit insecure about what he’s about to say. At that exact moment, try to appreciate him and then give him a hug.

Passion spikes and your ability to maintain that

Passion makes things very obvious, but makes a relationship special.
You can only maintain the passion if you are working towards your relationship. Passion often comes out of a place of ambiguity which needs to maintained by you. You just can’t be that monotonous that your guy starts getting used to it. The idea here is to make it a bit more unconventional so that they don’t get to anticipate anything. The more they think about your next move, the more intrigued they become about you. This playful tease will help you keep the passion spiked up, but don’t play by the polarities, because that might churn a chunk of insecurities between you and your man. You would observe how engaging he has become over time. That is when you’ll realise your success in winning the man’s heart.

Regulate but don’t dissipate

Teasing doesn’t mean that you have an upper hand in the relationship, it means that you want your relationship to grow into something which is even bigger than both of you. But in case this becomes toxic, do stop. Just be aware of it and nothing is more important than being self-aware all this time through.