Kodi n'zotheka kukhululukira munthu amene anakunyengererani? Kodi munayamba mwadzifunsapo momwe zingakhalire mutakhululuka ndikupitiriza - limodzi kapena mosiyana? Kukhululukira munthu amene anakunyengerera si chinthu chophweka koma anthu ambiri amachita zimenezi n’kupeza mtendere wawo.
Mtengo womwe mumauphatikiza paubwenziwo umasintha kuchuluka kwake mukangopeza kuti mnzanu wasokera. Mumamva mkwiyo, kuperekedwa, ndi kukhumudwitsidwa kufikira pamene mukumva chisoni chosathetsedwa. Lingaliro la chikhululukiro pambuyo pa chinyengo lingawoneke ngati lachilendo mukakhala mumkhalidwe wokhumudwa.
Koma kukhululukira chinyengo mnzanu si za iwo, ndi za inu kusunga mtendere wanu wa mumtima. Zitha kuwoneka ngati zosatheka kukhululukira munthu yemwe mumamukonda kwambiri mpaka mutazindikira kuti wakunyengani. Mutha kudziimba mlandu ndikudzifunsa kuti, "Ndinalakwika pati?" kapena "Kodi ndi ine amene ndinapangitsa ubale kukhala wowawa?".
Musanawononge maganizo anu ndi kudzidalira kwanu, kumbukirani kuti kusakhulupirika ndi kusankha, ndipo mnzanuyo anasankha kukunyengererani. Ziribe kanthu zovuta zomwe zidachitika muubwenzi wanu, zikadathetsedwa mosiyana kudzera mukulankhulana komanso/kapena uphungu wa maanja. Kubera sikungakhale njira yothetsera vutolo. Mfundo yaikulu ndi yakuti palibe amene angakakamize aliyense kuchita chigololo.
Panthawi imodzimodziyo, ndi chisankho chanu kukhululukira munthu amene anakunyengererani ndipo sikuyenera kutengera mphamvu iliyonse yakunja. Ngati mwasankha kukhalabe muubwenzi, kukhululukira mnzanu wonyenga mwina ndi sitepe yofunikira kuti muchiritse kusakhulupirika kuposa ufulu. Tsopano zimabwera ku funso limodzi lokha: Kodi mungakhululukire bwanji munthu chifukwa chachinyengo?
Kuti tidziwe momwe tingakhululukire munthu wonyenga ndikukhala limodzi komanso kuyankha kuti “N’chifukwa chiyani anthu amachita chinyengo?”, tinakambirana ndi mphunzitsi wa ubale ndi ubwenzi Utkarsh Khurana (MA Clinical Psychology, Ph.D. Scholar) yemwe ndi mphunzitsi woyendera ku Amity University ndipo ndi katswiri pa nkhani za nkhawa, zikhulupiriro zoipa, ndi kudzipatula paubwenzi, kungotchulapo zochepa chabe.
Njira 8 Zokhululukira Munthu Amene Anakunyengererani
M'ndandanda wazopezekamo
Kukhululukira mnzanu wachinyengo kapena mnzanu kumatenga nthawi; chikhululuko sichibwera tsiku limodzi. Pamene nkhonya ya kusakhulupirika ikuchitidwa paubwenzi, sikungakhale kwanzeru kuyembekezera kuti mukhoza kungogwedeza ndi kupita patsogolo ngati kuti palibe chimene chachitika. Zoonadi, kubera kungasinthe chikhalidwe cha ubale wanu m'njira zambiri, ngakhale mutasankha kukhala pamodzi.
Ariana (dzina lasinthidwa), yemwe anayenera kuthana ndi makhalidwe ochenjeza a mwamuna wake wonyenga nthawi zambiri , anati, "Kukhululukira munthu amene anakunyengani n'kovuta. Ndikukuuzani izi kuchokera pa zomwe ndakumana nazo chifukwa mwamuna wanga wandinyenga kangapo. Nthawi yoyamba izi zinachitika, zinandidabwitsa ndipo ndinamva chisoni kwa masiku ambiri. Kenako, anapepesa ndipo tinakonza ubale wathu. Koma wakhala akuchita chinyengo nthawi zambiri ndipo tsopano akuyamba chithandizo. Ndamukhululukira chifukwa ndi bambo wabwino kwa ana athu anayi."
Tinamufunsa katswiri wathu, kodi ndizotheka kukhululuka kwathunthu munthu amene anakunyengererani? Kumeneko, Utkarsh akuti, "Ndidzayankha inde. N'zotheka kukhululukira munthu amene wakunyengererani ngakhale kuti zimadalira zomwe kubera muubwenzi kumatanthauzadi kwa inu. Ngati mumaona kuti kusakhulupirika ndi kuphwanya mgwirizano ndikuwona kuti kunyenga kuli kofanana ndi 'ubale wosweka', ndiye kuti simungathe kukhululukira munthu wina.
"Koma ngati mukuona kuphwanya chikhulupiriro kumeneku ngati chizindikiro choopsa cha ubale kapena ngati chizindikiro chosonyeza kuti pali zingwe zina zomwe zayambitsa chinyengo muubwenzi, ndiye kuti mungakhale omasuka kuphunzira momwe mungakhululukire chinyengo. Zikatero, mungafike pamlingo wokhululukirana kwathunthu pamodzi ndi kuthetsa mavuto omwe ali pakati pa inu ndi mnzanu."
Chifukwa chake, titha kunena kuti kukhululukidwa pambuyo pa kubera ndikotheka ngakhale zingatenge mphamvu zamalingaliro komanso kulimba mtima kumbali yanu. Njira yokhululukira mnzanu wachinyengo kapena mnzanu imabwera m'njira zingapo. Kaya mukudabwa momwe mungakhululukire bwenzi lachinyengo / mnzanu kapena kuyesa kupeza njira yokhululukira mnzanuyo chifukwa chachinyengo ndikumanganso ubale, apa pali njira zokhululukira munthu amene anakunyengererani:
1. Landirani mkhalidwe wanu wamalingaliro ndi malingaliro
Kuberedwa kumawononga thanzi la munthu. Kuti mukhululukire mnzanu wachinyengo, vomerezani kuti mukumva chisoni ndipo ndi bwino kukhala achisoni. Osatsekereza malingaliro anu; amakonda kukalipa mwa njira zina zopweteka. Landirani zotsatira za maganizo ndi maganizo za kusakhulupirika. Kugonana kunja kwa banja kumakhudza kwambiri inu ndipo ndizoyenera.
Utkarsh akuti, "Nthawi zambiri, mkhalidwe wokwiya womwe timamva ndi kudzikuza kwathu kuti tidziteteze. Mwachitsanzo, ngati mupeza mnzanu akugona ndi munthu wina, mudzakwiya, ndikudabwa kuti, "N'chifukwa chiyani anthu amabera munthu amene amamukonda ?" Padzakhala mkwiyo ndi kukhumudwa ndipo ndiyo njira yanu yodzitetezera.
"Kapena mungakane malingaliro anu enieni achisoni, kuzunzika, ndi mantha." Ngakhale kuti mukuzidziwa mosadziwa, mumatsutsa malingaliro amenewo chifukwa ndi ovuta kwambiri kukumana nawo.
"Kukhululukira munthu wonyenga msanga kungakhale chisankho chosakonzekera chifukwa kukhululukira si njira yothetsera mavuto a m'banja. Ndi njira yayitali yomwe imayamba ndi inu. Dzichitireni chifundo choyamba. Simukuchitira zabwino mnzanu mwa kukhululukira. Ndi njira yanu yodzimasula mwa kusiya mavuto a m'maganizo ."
2. Fotokozani
Kulira mu pilo. Sewani nyimbo yachisoni ndikulala ngati mwana. Lembani chilichonse chimene mukumva. Kodi mukufuna kutukwana? Lembani pansi kapena kufuula pakhoma m'chipinda chopanda kanthu. Mkwiyo uchotsedwe; misozi ija ituluke. Ngati simungathe kufotokoza zakupsa mtima kwanu kwa wokondedwa wanu, chitani ndi mnzanu kapena wachibale yemwe angamvetse zomwe zikuchitika ndipo sangakuweruzeni.
Tikudziwa kuti sikophweka kuchotsa zithunzi za mnzanuyo ndi munthu winayo m'maganizo mwanu. Koma simungathe kudziwa momwe mungakhululukire kubera malinga ngati mugwiritsa ntchito zakale. Mukhozanso kuyankhula ndi phungu yemwe angakuthandizeni kuthetsa malingaliro anu ndikupeza malingaliro. Muyenera kufotokoza maganizo anu kuti muonetsetse mmene mukumvera. Iyi ndi njira yokhayo yomwe mungafikire ku njira yokhululukira munthu amene anakunyengani.
3. Lankhulani ndi mnzanu kuti mukhululukire wina chifukwa chachinyengo
Nthawi zina, kulankhula ndi munthu amene mumamukhulupirira kapena munthu wina amene mukuganiza kuti angakumvetseni ndi chinthu chabwino kwambiri chimene mungachite mukakhala ndi vuto la maganizo. Ndi bwino kukhala ndi maganizo osiyana pa chisoni chanu. Osayesera kuchiza nokha. Fufuzani ndi kupeza chithandizo kuchokera kwa wokhulupirira. Nthawi zina, kupita kokacheza ndi anzanu kumathandizanso.
Simuyenera kukambirana nawo za vuto lanu koma kungolankhula za masiku akusukulu kapena aku koleji ndikuseka mokweza kungakhale kothandiza. Kulankhulana ndi anthu nthawi zonse kumathandiza kugwira ntchito ngati kuchepetsa nkhawa. Simudzakhala ndi nthawi yokhala ndi malingaliro olakwika omwe mwakhala mukukumana nawo ngati mukulankhulana ndi anthu ozungulira. Kuti mudziwe momwe mungakhululukire munthu wachinyengo, choyamba muyenera kuchira kuchokera pakubwerera. Kukhala ndi anthu amene amakusangalatsani kudzakuthandizani kuchita zimenezo.
Kuwerenga Kofanana: Kuthana ndi Kuvutika Maganizo Pambuyo Pobera Munthu - Malangizo 7 a Akatswiri
4. Dzipatseni inu ndi okondedwa wanu mpata
Kumamatira kwa mnzanu amene amabera kuti ayang'ane zomwe akuchita sikungowononga mtendere wanu wamalingaliro komanso kuwononga ubale wanu kwambiri. Ngati mukuganiza zokhululukirana, dzipatseni inu nokha ndi mnzanuyo mpata. Ikhoza kukuthandizani kuti muwunikenso momwe mumaonera chibwenzicho.
Ndi nthawi imodzi yomwe kupuma pa chibwenzi kumaoneka ngati chisankho chabwino. Tulukani kwa miyezi ingapo ndikuyamba kukhala padera. Mwanjira imeneyi mudzazindikira kufunika kwanu kwa wina ndi mnzake. Mwamanga moyo limodzi pakapita nthawi ndipo ngakhale kuti kusakhulupirika kwachitika, pali ulusi womwe umakulumikizani nonse awiri. Mukangokhala padera mutha kuyamba kugwira ntchito yobwezeretsa ubalewo ndipo kukhululukira mnzanu wonyenga kudzakhala kosavuta.
Izi zimakhala zofunikira kwambiri ngati mukuyesera kukhululukira munthu amene anakunyengani kangapo. Popeza kusakhulupirika kobwerezabwereza kungayambitse kukhulupilika kwakukulu muubwenzi, mtunda wina ukhoza kukupatsani malingaliro atsopano pa zomwe mukufuna nokha. Kodi mukufuna kuwapatsa mwayi wina kapena kupuma koyera? Kumbukirani kuti kukhululukidwa pambuyo pa kunyenga ndi kubwereranso mnzako sikudalirana kwenikweni.
Malinga ndi Utkarsh, "Kukhala ndi malo ndikofunikira kwambiri pankhani yochita ndi mnzanu wonyenga. Ngati mukudabwa kuti, "Kodi mungakhululukire bwanji munthu amene ananama ndi chinyengo?", muyenera kudziwa kuti zimadalira kwambiri mgwirizano ndi ubale wachikondi womwe awiriwa ali nawo muubwenzi wawo.
"Othandizana nawo atha kuthetsa izi mwakulankhulana kolimbikitsa, komwe onse amakhala owona mtima komanso odzikonda, osadziteteza. Panthawi imodzimodziyo, ndikofunikira kulemekeza malo amunthu wina ndi mnzake. M'mikhalidwe ngati imeneyi, anthu amachita kuchokera kumalingaliro awo osazindikira ndipo pali mwayi waukulu wokana. zokumana nazo m'maganizo ndi m'thupi."
5. Kodi mungakhululukire bwanji munthu wachinyengo? Ganizirani chithandizo
Uphungu wa ubale ungakuthandizeni kwambiri kapena yesani chithandizo cha banja kuti mulankhule momasuka ndi mnzanu kudzera mu thandizo la akatswiri. Uphungu ukhoza kuthetsa mavuto omwe mukukumana nawo muukwati wanu omwe adachitika poyamba. Nthawi zambiri okwatirana amavutika kulankhulana wina ndi mnzake pambuyo poti achita chigololo. Kodi mungakhululukire bwanji munthu amene anakunamizani pamene simungathe kumuyang'ana?
Pali kusakhazikika komanso kukayikirana, ndipo kudalirana kumatayika kwathunthu. Koma ngati mnzanu akumva chisoni chifukwa cha zochita zake ndipo ali wokonzeka kugwira ntchito yokonzanso ubalewo, mlangizi angakuthandizeni kupeza njira yosavuta yolankhulirana komanso kulumikizana komwe kwatayika pakati pa inu nonse. Chabwino kwambiri, chithandizo chingathandize pakumanganso pang'onopang'ono kudalirana. Kuti mudziwe, alangizi aluso komanso odziwa zambiri omwe ali m'gulu la akatswiri a Bonobology nthawi zonse amakhala nanu.
6. Khalani omvetsetsa
Osati za kusakhulupirika. Koma chomwe chinapangitsa mnzanuyo kusochera (izi zidzanenedwa pa nthawi ya chithandizo). Nthawi zambiri kusakhulupirika kungachitike chifukwa mnzanuyo ankamva kuti sakusamalidwa, sakuyamikiridwa, kapena sakusangalala muubwenziwo . Ngakhale kuti zimenezo sizikutanthauza kuti chinyengocho n'cholakwika, zingakuthandizeni kumvetsetsa maganizo awo akasankha kuwononga chikhulupiriro chanu.
Ngati mukufuna kukhululukira mnzanu amene adabera ndikuyambanso naye, muyenera kudutsa siteji yomuimba mlandu pazomwe adachita. Kumvetsetsa chifukwa chake adabera poyamba kungathandize pa akauntiyo. Komabe, sizikutanthauza kuti mumadziimba mlandu chifukwa mnzanu wasochera. Sitikunena kuti mukhululukire wachinyengo posachedwa koma musadzimve kuti ndi wolakwa chifukwa cha kusakhulupirika kwa mnzako.
7. Osakonzekera kubwezera
Kodi mungakhululukire bwanji munthu chifukwa cha chinyengo? Yambani ndi kuvomereza kuti kukhululuka ndi kubwezera sizingakhalepo nthawi imodzi. Kubwezera ndi chinthu chofala kwambiri. "Mnzanga wandinyenga, choncho ndichita chinyengo kuti ndibwezere" ndi chinthu chopusa ndipo mutha kudzivulaza nokha komanso chibwenzi chanu kwambiri. Choncho ndi bwino kusalimbikitsa lingaliro la chinyengo chobwezera m'mutu mwanu.
Mkwiyo woperekedwa kuti ‘ubwezere kwa iye’ udzakulitsa mkhalidwewo mokulirapo. Anthu okwatirana amene sangadutse mkwiyowo amakhala ndi nkhani zazikulu zokhulupirirana ngakhale atakhalabe pachibwenzi. Muyenera kudutsa gawolo. Pang’ono ndi pang’ono, lekani mkwiyowo ndipo musakhale obwezera. Muyenera kupeza mphamvu pa malingaliro anu. Pezani kukhazikika kwanu ndikuyang'ana ntchito yanu, nyumba, kapena zomwe mumakonda.
8. Dulani kusatetezeka
Pambuyo podziwa za kusakhulupirika mnzako, inu mukuyenera kumva wosatetezeka za kusuntha awo sitepe iliyonse ya njira. Koma kukhululukira mnzanu wonyenga kumakhudzana kwambiri ndi kuphunzira kukhulupiriranso mnzanuyo kusiyana ndi kukhala wosatetezeka komanso wokayikira za iwo. Si zachilendo kuti muzichita zinthu mopupuluma pamene mnzanu amene akubera naye ali pafupi ndi foni kapena akafika mochedwa kuchokera kuntchito, maganizo anu amatha kugwedezeka.
Kuwerenga Kofanana: Kodi Kutumizirana Mauthenga Abwino Ndi Kunyenga Ngati Muli Pachibwenzi?
Kuphatikiza apo, kunyengedwa kungakuwonongereni kudzidalira kwanu, ndipo maganizo monga akuti “Sindili woyenera kwa iwo” nthawi zambiri amakubwererani m'maganizo. Kuti mudziwe luso la 'momwe mungakhululukire wonyenga ndikukhala limodzi', muyenera kusiya kudzimvera chisoni. Ndipo pankhani imeneyi, mnzanu ayenera kukhala ndi gawo lofunika kwambiri pakukutsimikizirani kuti si inu, ndi iwo. Ayeneranso kuchitapo kanthu kuti atsimikizire kuti simukumvanso kuti ndinu osatetezeka muubwenzi . Ndiyo njira yokhayo yopempherera ndikukhululukirani mutachita chinyengo.
Utkarsh akusonyeza kuti, "Pa izi, sindidzapita ndikugwiritsa ntchito chinenero chilichonse chapamwamba kapena kufotokoza momveka bwino. Kusatetezeka ndi kwachibadwa mu maubwenzi. Kusatetezeka ndi khomo lodziwonetsera nokha. M'malo mochita kapena kuzipewa, muyenera kuzivomereza ndikuzilemekeza. Perekani kusatetezeka kwanu malo ena ndikumvetsa zomwe kusatetezeka kwanu kudzakuthandizani.
Kudzichiritsa Wekha Mukakhululuka Munthu Amene Anakunyengererani
Kodi mungakhululukire munthu amene anakunyengani? Funsoli liyenera kukuvutitsani mukangochita chinyengo. Panthawiyi, zingawoneke ngati yankho la funsoli ndi lomveka, lomveka AYI. Komabe, pamene nthawi ikuyamba kusokoneza kupweteka, kukhululuka pambuyo pa chinyengo kumayamba kuoneka ngati koyenera.
Koma musanakhululukire mnzanu amene adakunyengani, muyenera kuchira ndikuchira kwathunthu. Kusakhulupirika sikutanthauza kutha kwa chibwenzi. Zinthu zina sizingasinthe ndipo musanathetse zinthu ndikusankha kusakhululuka, ganizirani za mavuto omwe angakubweretsereni.
Dzifunseni mafunso awa:
- Kodi mumakonda mnzanu?
- Kodi mukufuna kukhalabe pachibwenzi?
- Kodi mudzatha kukhulupiriranso bwenzi lanu lachinyengo?
- Kodi ndinu wokonzeka kupitilira chibwenzicho?
- Kodi ndinu okonzeka kugwira ntchito pa ubale?
Ngati yankho liri inde kwa zonsezi pamwambapa, choyamba muyenera kuchiza. Kuchiritsa kumatanthauza kuphunzira za m’mbuyo osati kuzilola kuti ziwononge panopa. Nazi zinthu zingapo zomwe muyenera kukumbukira ngati mukuyesera kudzichiritsa nokha ndikuyang'ana mayankho amomwe mungakhululukire munthu amene ananamizani ndikukunyengani:
Kuwerenga Kofanana: Kusakhazikika Pakumanganso Ubale Pambuyo pa Kunyenga Ndi Momwe Mungachitire
1. Dziwani zomwe mumayimirira ndikutaya masewera olakwa
Kodi mwakonzeka kukhululukira mnzanu wonyenga ndikudutsa kusakhulupirika? Kodi mukuganiza kuti mungathe kukhala paubwenzi wabwino ndi munthu amene wasiya kukukhulupirirani kamodzi kapena kambirimbiri? Kodi mudzatha kusiya zowawazo ndikuyesera kudaliranso? Kapena mumawakhomererabe ngati munthu wachiwerewere amene sankasamala za kupatulika kwa unansi wanu? Dziyeseni nokha musanalowe.
Utkarsh akuti, " Kusinthana mlandu ndi njira yanu yodzitetezera muubwenzi. M'malo moyamba kukayikirana maganizo, okwatirana ayenera kuyesetsa kumvetsetsa mfundo za khalidwe linalake chifukwa palibe amene amawononga ubale wawo mwadala. Aliyense amafuna kuti zinthu ziyende bwino."
"Ngati mumvetsetsa kusiyana kwa khalidweli, kungakuthandizeni kuzindikira kumene khalidwelo likuchokera. Mukatha kumvetsetsa zomwe akuchita ndi kuzama kwamaganizo, zikhoza kukuthandizani kuona mnzanuyo m'njira yatsopano ndikumvetsetsa momwe akuganizira. Pambuyo pake, mudzadziwa momwe mungakhululukire mnzanuyo chifukwa chachinyengo."
2. Osafunsa zambiri zakuda
Ngati mukufuna kupitirira zonse, musafunse za zinthu zodetsa za chibwenzicho. Zidzakupwetekani chifukwa mudzapitiriza kuganiza kuti mnzanuyo ali pachibwenzi ndi munthu wina. Inde, mudzakhala ndi mafunso ambirimbiri okhudza chiyani, chifukwa chake, komanso momwe zonsezi zilili. Funsani mnzanu wonyenga mafunso oyenera omwe angakuthandizeni kuiwala nkhaniyi m'malo moibwereza m'maganizo mwanu. Chinthu chabwino kuchita ndi kusaganizira kwambiri za tsatanetsatane wa chibwenzicho.
3. Kuyesera kuchiza usiku sikotheka
Kodi mungakhululukire bwanji munthu chifukwa chachinyengo ndikudzichiritsa nokha? Vomerezani mfundo yakuti chidaliro chanu chasweka ndipo sichingakonzedwe usiku umodzi. Kuyesa kunamizira kuti zonse zabwerera mwakale kumalepheretsa kuchira. M'malo mwake, kambiranani zomwe zimakuchititsani mantha muubwenzi ndi mnzanuyo. Perekani ubale wanu ndi mnzanuyo nthawi kuti mukhale bwino.
4. Pewani chakukhosi
Chinsinsi cha momwe mungakhululukire wachinyengo ndikusiya zakale kuti zikwire akufa ake. Kusunga chakukhosi ndi kusasunthika podutsa chibwenzicho sikungakufikitseni kulikonse. Kukakamira nthawi zonse za chibwenzicho kapena kugwiritsa ntchito chibwenzicho ngati chida chopusitsira mnzanu kapena kumufooketsa kukuwonetsa kuti mumasungabe chakukhosi. Kusunga chakukhosi kumapangitsa kuti zikhale zovuta kukhazikitsanso ubale wabwino, komanso kumawononganso moyo wanu.
5. Perekani chikhulupiriro mwayi wachiwiri
Kuti mukhululukire mnzanu mutatha kuchita zachinyengo, yesetsani kumanganso chikhulupiriro muubwenzi wanu . Sizidzakhala zosavuta kudalira mnzanuyo kachiwiri koma onetsetsani kuti mukupitirizabe kuyesetsa mpaka mutakhala kuti simukukayikira chilichonse chimene akunena. Kudalirana ndiko maziko a ubale uliwonse kotero pezani mumtima ndi m'maganizo mwanu kukhulupirira ndikukhululukira mnzanuyo.
Zolozera Mfungulo
- Vomerezani malingaliro anu ndikuwongolera malingaliro anu m'njira yabwino kuti mukhululukire munthu amene wakunyengeni
- Lankhulani ndi bwenzi ndikutulutsani ngati mukufuna kumasula mkwiyo wanu
- Dzipatseni nokha ndi mnzanuyo malo kuti mudutse zowawa ndi zosatetezeka
- Kubwezera chinyengo si njira yoyenera
- Yesetsani kuchepetsa mkwiyo wanu ngati mukufuna kuyambanso kukhulupirirana ndi mnzanuyo, ndipo pitani kukalandira chitsogozo cha akatswiri ngati mukuyenera kutero.
Kuchiza ku kusakhulupirika pa ubale ndizovuta. Koma m’kupita kwa nthaŵi ndi kuleza mtima, unansi womangidwanso ukhoza kukhala wolimba kwambiri. Palibe kukayika kuti kukhululukira anthu angapo ndikovuta kwambiri ndipo ngati simungathe kutero, ndizomveka. Koma monga tanenera poyamba paja, muyenera kudzifunsa mafunso ofunika kwambiri musanakhululukire munthu amene anakunyengeni.
Ibibazo
M'malo mwake, ndinu olimba ngati mutha kukhululukira munthu pambuyo pa chinyengo. Zimafunika mphamvu zamakhalidwe kuti zithe kuyang'ana zabwino za munthu ndikuchoka pa kuperekedwa.
Mutamva chisoni, mumathetsa maganizo anu, ndipo pang’onopang’ono n’zotheka kukhululukira munthu amene anakunyengani. Kuti mukhululukire mnzanu chifukwa chakubera, muyenera kuchira kuchokera ku kubwereranso kwathunthu osati kunyalanyaza kapena kusunga malingaliro anu.
Zingatenge nthawi chifukwa mnzanuyo akhoza kupitiriza kuzunzika pambuyo pa kusakhulupirika. Koma ngati onse awiri ayesetsa kuyambiranso kukhulupirirana, ubwenziwo ukhoza kubwerera mwakale.
Zimatengera munthu payekha komanso momwe akukhudzidwira ndi kuperekedwa. Ena angatenge miyezi ingapo, ena chaka kapena ziwiri, ndipo ena sangakhululukire konse. Ena mwa iwo akhoza kupitiriza kuyamwitsa ululu.
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Chopereka chanu sichikutanthauza chopereka chachifundo . Chidzalola Bonobology kupitiliza kukubweretserani chidziwitso chatsopano komanso chaposachedwa poyesetsa kuthandiza aliyense padziko lonse lapansi kuphunzira momwe angachitire chilichonse.
Kukhululuka kumatanthauza kuvomereza zoona zake, kumaoneka ngati wachinyengo ngati munthu sachedwa kutengeka ndi kugonjetsa maganizo oipa/obwezera munthu wachinyengo. Choyamba ndi chachikulu pakukhululuka ndikugonjetsa malingaliro obwezera pa wachinyengo. Kubwezera kumaphatikizapo kuwulutsa dziko lonse lapansi za chinyengo ndi kubweretsa chiwonongeko kwa ochita chinyengo pamaso pa okondedwa & okondedwa, ana awo, makolo awo ndi abale awo, abwenzi, ndi anthu ambiri, kupangitsa kupulumuka kwachinyengo kukhala kovutirapo pa moyo wadziko lapansi lino komanso chisudzulo chachiwawa. Kubwezera kumadzetsa ululu kwa iwe mwini komanso wachinyengo motero kuyenera kupewedwa. Kubwezera ndi khalidwe la nyama.
Kubera kumagwera kwambiri m'milandu yocheperako
1.Kaya wonyenga wakambiranapo nkhani za m'banja ndi zina zofunika kwambiri zomwe zinapangidwa mwala kapena samva kanthu motero wonyenga adakakamizika kubera. Komabe, mavuto m'banja sangakhale chilolezo chochitira chinyengo ndipo wachinyengo akanayenera kuwopseza/kutuluka m'banja zomwe sanachite.
2.Cheater anangosankha kubera popanda kuyesetsa kuthetsa mavuto mbanja. Zolinga zachinyengo ndizodziwikiratu chifukwa wachinyengo ndi wolimba mtima moti amatha kuponya nsalu ndikusangalala ndi zochitikazo ndi munthu wachitatu ndikuchita sewero kunyumba koma mwatsoka kwa wachinyengo, tsogolo lili ndi mapulani ena ndipo chinyengo chinawululidwa.
3.Wonyenga adasokera ndipo chifukwa cha kulakwa komanso kulapa kwenikweni adaulula zomwe adachitazo kwa mwamuna kapena mkazi wake ndipo adapempha chikhululukiro ndikulonjeza kuti sadzachitanso. Apa wonyenga akudziwa bwino lomwe kuti akuyika banja pachiwopsezo poulula & komabe kuwulula.
N'zosakayikitsa kuti kukhululukira munthu amene wamulakwira kwambiri n'kwa Mulungu. Koma ngati munthu akhululukire wachinyengo ndi kupitiriza ukwati wawo kapena kukhululukira wonyenga mwa njira zonse ndi zomwe ziyenera kuganiziridwa potengera kuthekera kwa munthu kuti atenge chowonadi chowawa / maliseche ndi chowonadi chowawa / nkhope yeniyeni ya okondedwa awo.
4.Kukhululuka ndi kupitiriza ukwati
Izi zimafuna nyonga yolimba yamalingaliro ndi mikhalidwe yaumwini. Ngati wina akhululuka ndi kupitiriza kukhalabe ndi wachinyengo, ayenera kuthana ndi malingaliro odzikayikira, odzikayikira, manyazi, ndi zina zotero. Izi zimafuna mphamvu zamaganizidwe amphamvu ndi mikhalidwe yamunthu apo ayi munthu atha kugonja ku kukhumudwa / ng'oma / malingaliro ofuna kudzipha. Munthu angapeze thandizo lauzimu kuti athetse vutoli ndi kukhululukira wachinyengo. Monga mwa uzimu, tonse ndife Atman okhala ndi matupi anyama. Pamlingo wa Atman, mzimu wapamwamba ndi bambo athu ndipo tonse ndife ana ake. Ma Atmans onse ali ndi zidziwitso zosiyana koma zofananira popanda kukwezeka kapena kutsika. Choncho palibe chifukwa chodana. Koma atachita chiwerewere/uchimo, munthu wachinyengo amakumana ndi machimo a zipatso mu kubadwa uku kapena mtsogolo. Ubale wanu ndi wachinyengo ndi utali wonse pamene thupi lanu lilipo pakubadwa uku. Maubwenzi athu osati pa nsanja yogonana koma kulumikizana kwa moyo. Khalani wachifundo kwa wachinyengo ndikhululukireni ndikudutsa.
5.Khululuka ndikupita patsogolo
Ndiwe munthu wamakhalidwe abwino ndipo sungathe kulekerera kulephera kukhulupirika. Komanso ndinu okhudzidwa komanso otengeka mtima simungatenge mfundo ndi kupitiriza ukwati. Kenako ganizirani kuti ngati munthu ali ndi moyo wabwino, amatha kukhala ndi zibwenzi zomwe zimapatsa chikondi chopanda dyera mwinanso amakhala ndi zigawenga zodzikonda / onyenga ndipo ndiye tsogolo ndikuvomereza. Mutha kuwamvera chisoni mmalo mwa mkwiyo, ndi chifundo pempherani Mulungu kuti awapatse nzeru zawo komanso kutukuka kwawo ndikuwonetsetsa kuti mukulephera kupitiliza ubale wawo afterall u are also human like cheat but not a Saint. Popanda mtundu ndi kulira, popanda kuwononga mbiri ya onyenga ndi kuvomerezana mbali imodzi.