Momwe Mungalekere Kudzimva Kuti Ndilibe Nanu Ndi Kudzaza Chosowa

Kukhala ndi moyo wachabechabe ndi imodzi mwa masoka aakulu kwambiri pa moyo wa munthu. Munthu amene amakumana nazo poyamba amadzimva kuti watayika, wosungulumwa, komanso wosungulumwa. Ngakhale kuti muli ndi moyo wotetezeka, ntchito yabwino, ndi maunansi abwino ndi achibale ndi mabwenzi, mumaonabe kuti chinachake chikusoweka mkati mwanu. Mphamvu zanu zonse zalunjika ku kudzaza malo, kumene mungakhale ndi vuto loletsa. 

Mukutsimikiza kuti kusakhutira kumeneku kukuchokera kwa inu koma simukudziwa chifukwa chenicheni cha izi. Kudziwa momwe mungadzazire malo opanda kanthu kungakhale kovuta ngati simukudziwa komwe kumachokera. Kuti tikuthandizeni kumvetsetsa bwino tanthauzo la kusowa kanthu komanso momwe mungazindikire kumverera kumeneku, tidalumikizana ndi Priyal Agarwal , yemwe ndi woyambitsa bizinesi ya SexTech, StandWeSpeak, komanso mphunzitsi wa thanzi la maganizo ndi kugonana.

Iye akulongosola kukhudzika monga, “Kutengeka maganizo kosiyanasiyana monga dzanzi, kusungulumwa, kudzimva kukhala wosokonekera, ndi chisoni chachikulu. Zonsezi ndi malingaliro oyenera kuyembekezera chifukwa cha kutayika kwakukulu, kupwetekedwa mtima, kutaya moyo, kapena masoka ena aliwonse a moyo. 

Zizindikiro Zachabechabe

Kungomva ngati chinachake chikusoweka kungawononge thanzi lanu la maganizo ndi maganizo anu. Mumaona ngati simukuzimvetsa. Pali kusowa kwa cholinga. Mumavutika kumvetsa tanthauzo la moyo. Kumverera kumeneku kungayambitse zizindikiro zisanu zotsatirazi za kuperewera. 

1. Kudziona ngati wopanda pake 

Muyenera kuyamba kuganizira momwe mungadzazire malowo pamene kuchita manyazi chifukwa cholephera 'kukwanira' kumalowa m'malingaliro anu. Anthu amene ali opanda kanthu mkati mwawo kaŵirikaŵiri amadziona ngati opanda pake ndipo alibe mikhalidwe yabwino ndi nyonga. Ndipotu, amakhulupirira kuti palibe chomwe angachite chomwe chidzasinthe "zenizeni" izi, ndi pamene kumverera kwachabechabe kumatuluka.

2. Kukhala wosungulumwa nthawi zonse 

Malinga ndi kafukufuku , kusungulumwa ndi vuto lofala kwambiri, ndipo 80% ya anthu osakwana zaka 18 ndi 40% ya anthu opitirira zaka 65 amanena kuti nthawi zina amakhala osungulumwa. Chizindikiro chodetsa nkhawa ichi chimatanthauza chisoni ndi kusowa chochita chifukwa chosowa kuyanjana ndi anthu.

Komabe, ziyenera kuzindikirika kuti kusungulumwa kumatha kuchitika ngakhale munthuyo ali m'chipinda chodzaza ndi anthu koma akumva kusamvetsetsana ndi kusamalidwa kosiyana ndi anthuwo. Amadzimva ngati ali okha padziko lapansi pano ndipo palibe kuyanjana kwa anthu komwe kungathe kudzaza chosowachi. 

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3. Kumva dzanzi

Ukakhala wopanda kanthu, umakhala dzanzi losatsutsika. Ndiko kulephera kumva kutengeka kulikonse. Ndi njira yothanirana ndi kupwetekedwa mtima kwambiri. Nthawi zambiri zimayamba chifukwa cha kuvulala, kuzunzidwa, kutayika, kapena kugwiritsa ntchito mankhwala osokoneza bongo monga njira yopulumukira kuchisoni.

4. Kutaya mtima ndi kusowa chiyembekezo

Mukayamba kuganiza kuti chisoni kapena dzanzi zomwe mukumva sizidzatha. Kusowa chiyembekezo kumachitika munthu akasiya kuganiza kuti akhoza kukhala bwino. Amamva ngati akufuna kusiya moyo chifukwa zimamveka zopanda phindu. Maganizo amenewa amatha kuipitsa mavuto awo amisala.

5. Kutaya chidwi 

Kupanda chidwi kumabwera ndi kutaya chidwi pa chilichonse. Anthu amayamba kutaya chidwi ndi zinthu zomwe poyamba zinkawabweretsera chisangalalo ndi chisangalalo. Angapitirize kuchita zimenezi, koma amatopa ndipo sasangalala ndi mmene ankachitira m’mbuyomo.

Kodi Kusowaku Kumachokera Kuti? 

Kusowa kwanu kwa ntchito kungakhale chifukwa cha zinthu zambiri kuphatikizapo kusowa ntchito, kusintha kwa mahomoni, komanso mavuto a ubale. Ngakhale vuto lomwe lingafunike kuti muganizire za inu nokha lingayambitse kumva ngati mulibe kanthu, ngakhale kwakanthawi. Lingabwerenso chifukwa cha kutaya mtima, kumva ngati mulibe kanthu pambuyo pa kusudzulana.

Kupanda kanthu ndi chizindikiro cha kupsinjika maganizo, bipolar disorder, ndi PTSD. Nkhani zozama izi zitha kuzindikirika ndi dokotala wazamisala yemwe ali ndi chilolezo. Mokulira, kudzimva wopanda kanthu kungabwere chifukwa chimodzi kapena zingapo mwazifukwa izi: 

1. Kukumana ndi imfa ya wokondedwa

Priyal ananena kuti: “Anthu amene ataya munthu kapena chinthu chimene amachikonda kwambiri amangodziona kuti ndi opanda phindu.” Kutayikidwa kumeneku kungatanthauze imfa ya m’banja, kupatukana ndi mnzako kapena munthu amene anali pachibwenzi, kupititsidwa padera, ngakhale kutaya ndalama. 

"Zachidziwikire, chisoni ndi yankho lachibadwa la imfa ya okondedwa , ndipo nthawi zambiri chimakhala ndi kusungulumwa kwakukulu. Maganizo amenewa akamachepa kapena kutha pakapita nthawi, akhoza kukhala chifukwa chodera nkhawa."

2. Kukumana ndi zoopsa

Zochitika zoopsa monga nkhanza, kusokonezedwa, kunyalanyazidwa ndi mpweya, ndi kunyalanyazidwa zingakhale ndi zotsatirapo zazikulu pakumva kuti munthu ali yekha. Kafukufuku akusonyeza kuti anthu omwe adachitiridwa nkhanza ali ana, makamaka kunyalanyazidwa ndi maganizo, nthawi zambiri amakhala ndi vuto la matenda amisala komanso kusowa chochita nthawi zonse.

3. Lingaliro chabe lachinthu chachilendo

Pamene chinachake chalakwika kapena kusowa m’moyo wa munthu, kaŵirikaŵiri zimampangitsa kudzimva kukhala wopanda pake. Izi zitha kukhala kugwira ntchito yomwe amainyoza, kapena kukhala paubwenzi wopanda chikondi.

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4. Njira yothanirana ndi vuto 

Polankhula za njira zosayenera zomwe anthu amakumana nazo akamenyedwa kapena kuthawa, Priyal akuti, "Nthawi zambiri anthu satha kuletsa malingaliro awo ovutirapo popanda kukhudza malingaliro awo abwino, izi zimawapangitsa kukhala ndi njira zosayenera, zomwe zimawonjezera kudzimva kuti alibe kanthu."

Mwachitsanzo, pamene wina akumva kuti ali yekhayekha kapena akulimbana ndi vuto, nthawi zambiri amadzimva chisoni pogwiritsa ntchito mankhwala osokoneza bongo, kugonana, kudziletsa okha kuntchito, ndi zinthu zina kuti maganizo ake azikhala otanganidwa m'malo mongoganizira zomwe akumva komanso kudzipangira okha.

5. Kusokonezeka kwa umunthu

Malinga ndi kafukufuku , kudzimva wopanda pake nthawi zonse n'kofunika kwambiri m'miyoyo ya anthu omwe ali ndi vuto la umunthu wosagwirizana ndi malire (BPD). Kudzimva wopanda pake kumeneku kwagwirizanitsidwa ndi kusafuna kuchitapo kanthu, kudzivulaza, khalidwe lodzipha, komanso kusokonezeka kwa ntchito zamaganizo.

Kupanda kanthu nthawi zambiri kumakhala chizindikiro cha vuto lakuya lamalingaliro, monga bipolar disorder, kapena BPD, pakati pa ena. Popeza kuti kulibe kanthu kumagwirizana ndi zomwe munthu aliyense akukumana nazo, pali zifukwa zambiri zamkati ndi zakunja zomwe zingakhale muzu wa nkhaniyo.

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Njira Zosathandiza Anthu Amayesa Kudzaza Chosowa Chawo Ndi

Anthu ena amayesa kudzaza malo obisika mwa kulowa mu maubwenzi ambiri. Chisangalalo choyambitsa chinthu chatsopano chimawasangalatsa. Amakhala pachibwenzi nthawi ndi nthawi ndipo amasinthasintha kuchokera ku ubale wina kupita ku wina. Sakuyesera kupeza chikondi chenicheni koma akungodzaza malo obisika. Mayesero ena osapindulitsa omwe anthu amachita kuti adzaze malo obisika mkati mwawo ndi awa:

• Kugula zinthu zakuthupi ndi kuwononga zinthu zosafunikira 
• Kumwa mowa mwauchidakwa, kugwiritsa ntchito mankhwala osokoneza bongo, komanso kugona usiku umodzi
• Kudzaza malo powonera mawonetsero ambiri 
• Kugwira ntchito mosalekeza popanda kupuma

Komabe, palibe amene angadzaze malo opanda kanthu omwe sanakonzekere kuzindikira. Ngati simukumvetsabe chifukwa chake mukumva kuti mulibe kanthu, gulu la akatswiri odziwa bwino ntchito ya Bonobology lili pano kuti likutsogolereni munjira imeneyi ndikukupatsani njira yoti muchiritse.

Katswiri Akuwulula Momwe Mungadzazitsire Zosowazo

Mumamva kuti mulibe kanthu chifukwa mukuganiza kuti simukukondedwa komanso kuti palibe amene amakufunani kapena amakusamalirani. Kudziona kolakwika uku kumasokoneza malingaliro anu komanso momwe mumadziwonera nokha. Zisanakhale zovuta, muyenera kudziwa momwe mungatsegulire chosowacho. Nazi njira zingapo zothandizira akatswiri omwe angathandize: 

1. Kukhala mwadala ndi nthawi yanu yopuma

Priyal analangiza kuti: “Konzani ulendo wanu waung’ono koma wokhutiritsa pa nthawi yanu yopuma.” Mudzaona ngati mungafunike kukana mapulaniwo chifukwa chakuti simukufuna kuwachita, koma m’pofunika kusiya maganizo amenewa ndi kusonkhezera maganizo anu ndi zinthu zatsopano.”

Iyi ndi sitepe yoyamba yodzikonda nokha ndipo ndi yovuta kwambiri, koma kupeza zosangalatsa zatsopano, kufufuza malo atsopano, ndi kutenga nawo mbali muzochitika zatsopano kudzakuthandizani kupatsa malingaliro anu mphamvu zatsopano ndipo mutha kupeza njira zatsopano zolengera zinthu panjira.

2. Kuvomereza ululu wanu poyang'anizana ndi zilonda zosapola

Priyal akuti, "Kukonza mwadala mavuto anu akale kuti muthe kuchepetsa kutopa komwe kumabweretsa ndi gawo lofunika kwambiri paulendo wanu wodzaza malo opanda kanthu. Izi ziyenera kuchitika makamaka kudzera mu chithandizo, koma mutha kuwerenganso mabuku odzithandiza nokha ndikulowa m'magulu othandizira. Yakwana nthawi yoti muchiritse mtima wanu wosweka povomereza kuti mabala anu ndi oyenera ndipo amafunika kutsukidwa ndi kupakidwa kuvala.

M'pofunikanso kukhala pansi ndi kumva mmene mukumvera pa zowawa zimenezi kuti mumvetse bwino mmene zimakukhudzirani ndiponso chifukwa chake. Imodzi mwa njira zazikulu zothetsera vuto ndikuvomereza kuti mwavulazidwa. Ichi chikhalanso chanu choyamba ku machiritso. Mukasunga malingaliro anu kwa nthawi yayitali, m'pamenenso zimakhala zowawa kwambiri kuzifukula. 

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3. Kodi kudzaza chosowacho? Yesetsani kusinkhasinkha ndi kulingalira

Kusinkhasinkha ndi kulingalira kudzakuthandizani kuti mukhalepo pano ndi pano, zomwe zidzakuthandizani kuti mukhale okhudzidwa kwambiri ndi inu nokha ndi zochitika zanu za tsiku ndi tsiku. Izi zimagwiranso ntchito ngati njira zopumula zomwe zingakuthandizeni kuti mukhale bata komanso bata zomwe simungakhale nazo pakapita nthawi. Zina mwazinthu zomwe mungayesere khalani osamala ndi:

• Yoga
• Zochita zopumira mozama
• Kuyenda kwa mphindi 10 tsiku lililonse 
• Kulemba 

4. Kukhala wolimbikira

Priyal anati: “Mutha kuyesa kutseka malowa mwa kuchita zinthu zolimbitsa thupi kwambiri.

Pezani njira zodzipezera chibwenzi ndikudzipangitsa kumva kuti ndinu wofunika. Zina zomwe mungachite ndikudzipangira zolinga zazing'ono komanso zomwe mungathe kuzikwaniritsa. Zolingazo zitha kukhala chilichonse chokhudzana ndi ntchito yanu kapena moyo wanu waumwini. Zolinga zanthawi yochepa izi zidzakuthandizani kuthana ndi malingaliro osowa chiyembekezo komanso opanda pake. Zidzakuthandizani kutsogolera khama lanu pakupanga moyo wabwino.

5. Yesetsani kukwaniritsa zofunikira kuti mukhale ndi moyo

Katswiri wa zamaganizo wa ku America, Abraham Maslow, anabwera ndi chiphunzitso chotchedwa Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs. Zimayimira lingaliro loti anthu amafunikira zinthu zingapo zakuthupi ndi zamaganizo kuti akhalebe olimbikitsidwa moyo wawo wonse. Pali zofunika zisanu zofunika za munthu aliyense:

• Physiological - Chakudya, madzi, ndi kupuma 
• Chitetezo ndi chitetezo - Kunyumba, chuma, ndi thanzi
• Chikondi ndi kukhala - Mabwenzi, maubwenzi okondana, ndi magulu a anthu 
• Esteem - kuyamikira, ulemu, ndi kuyamikira 
• Kudziona wekha-Kudziwa luso la munthu, kukula kwake, ndi kudzikwaniritsa 

Ngati mukumva kuti mulibe kanthu, ndiye kuti pali mwayi umodzi kapena zambiri mwazofunikira izi sizikukwaniritsidwa m'moyo wanu. 

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6. Kubwezera

Priyal anati: “Kusaganizira ena n’chimodzi mwa zinthu zimene zimapindulitsa kwambiri m’maganizo mwanu kuti mugwiritse ntchito nthawi ndi mphamvu zanu.” Kupeza njira zothandizira anthu kumathandiza kuthana ndi maganizo odziona ngati opanda pake komanso kusungulumwa, zomwe zimayamba chifukwa chodziona ngati wosafunika komanso wosafunika.” Kukoma mtima kumeneku kungapezeke m’njira zosiyanasiyana, kuphatikizapo kupatsa anthu zachifundo, kuthandiza wantchito mnzathu, kupita kunyumba ya okalamba, kapena kungosonyeza kukoma mtima kulikonse kochokera pansi pa mtima. 

Moyo ungamve ngati wopanda tanthauzo mukamamva kuti mulibe kanthu. Koma si zoona. Maganizo anu oipa akukupangitsani kumva choncho. Mukangovomereza malingaliro osasangalatsa a kupweteka, mkwiyo, ndi kusungulumwa, mudzamva kuti ndinu opepuka. Dziwani kufunika kosiya ndipo mudzayamba ulendo wochira. Mudzamva kuti katundu akutha kuchokera m'mapewa anu.

Pokhapokha mutachira, mudzatha kupanga ubale wozama ndi inuyo ndi ena. Kusoweka mkati mwanu sikutanthauza kuti ndi mapeto a msewu. Zimangotanthauza kuti moyo ukukupatsirani mwayi wina wokonda nokha.  

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Chopereka chanu sichikutanthauza chopereka chachifundo . Chidzalola Bonobology kupitiliza kukubweretserani chidziwitso chatsopano komanso chaposachedwa poyesetsa kuthandiza aliyense padziko lonse lapansi kuphunzira momwe angachitire chilichonse.

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