Ngezinye izikhathi, singena endleleni yokwakha ezethu ngenjabulo njalo ngemva kwalokho. Lokhu kuthambekela yilokho izazi zokusebenza kwengqondo ezikuchaza njengokuzicekela phansi ebudlelwaneni. Lokhu kungachazwa njengekhono lokwenza ubudlelwano bakho buhlakazeke, ngokungazi noma ngokuqaphela. Kubantu abaningi, ukuziphatha kokuzilimaza kungokwemvelo kangangokuthi bayehluleka ukubona amaphethini ayinkinga.
Asikho isilinganiso sokulungisa inkambo futhi bonakalisa ubuhlobo ngokungazi. Ukuze uyeke ubudlelwano obuzilimazayo, udinga ukufunda ukukhomba izimpawu nezizathu zalokhu kuziphatha. Kungaleso sikhathi kuphela lapho unganqamula khona umjikelezo, futhi uzinikeze isithombe sangempela sokwakha ubudlelwano bothando obunenjongo.
Sikhuluma nodokotela wezengqondo Jayant Sundaresan (Ongoti ku-Applied Psychology), ogxile ekunikezeni ukwelulekwa ezindabeni eziningi zobudlelwano ezinjengokunqamuka kwezokuxhumana, ukuphathwa okulindelekile, ukungathembeki, ukuhlukana nesehlukaniso, ukuze baqonde kabanzi ngokuthi kungani abantu bezitika ngokucekela phansi ubudlelwano babo. Unikeza imininingwane ngezizathu zokuziphatha, ukuthi yini okufanele umuntu ayenze lapho eqaphela amaphethini akhe, nokuthi lokhu kuqwashisa kukusiza kanjani ukuthi ukhule.
Kungani Sizibhidliza Ubudlelwano Bothando?
Okuqukethwe
Ukuzilimaza ngokuvamile kubonakala njengokuthambekela kokucekela phansi ubudlelwano ngokungazi futhi izizathu zakho zingahluka kumuntu nomuntu. U-Jayant uthi, “Ukucekela phansi akudingekile ukuba kube ngokwedlulele njengokusebenzisa izidakamizwa, kungase kube lula njengokupholisa umoya. Ukugwema okuthile nokuhlehlisa kungase kube izinhlobo zokuzicekela phansi futhi. Uma usondela enjongweni, kulapho ufisa khona ukuwubalekela. Lokhu kungenxa yokuthi isigaba esilandelayo sempilo siphezu kwakho futhi awukwazi ukubhekana nalokho. Lesi sigaba esilandelayo sokugwema ukukhathazeka noma ukugwema impilo yakho siqu kuholela ebudlelwaneni obuseduze nawe. ubudlelwano.”
Umeluleki u-Meghna Prabhu, udokotela wezifo zengqondo futhi oyilungu le-APA, uyachaza futhi ukuthi kungani sizicekela phansi ubudlelwano bothando, “Yize izinto ezibangela ukuzicekela phansi zingahluka, konke kuza entweni eyodwa - ukungavuli imizwa nokwakha ubudlelwano obuseduze.
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Ngokusho kukaMeghna, lokhu kwenzeka kakhulu ngoba sisaba ukuthi ubudlelwano ngeke buphumelele. Singenza izinto ezifana nokuthola izizathu zokuhlukana, ukuphikisana ngezinto ngokuvamile esingenandaba nazo, futhi sigxile ezimpilweni zethu ngabanye ngaphezu kobudlelwane.
Isizathu esikhulu sakho konke lokhu ukwesaba ukuthi ubudlelwano ngeke buqhubeke. Ngakho asifuni ukutshala imali noma ukuvula futhi singase sihlukane ngaphambi kokuba omunye umuntu asishiye. Kuyindlela yokulawula noma yokukholelwa ukuthi siphethe. UJayant uyanezela kulokhu, “Abantu abaningi abanjalo bacabanga ukuthi kufanele ngibe umlahlisi, hhayi umuntu olahlwayo. Abanye abantu baze bazame ukukhohlisa ozakwethu ukuze bathole umphumela noma ukusabela okuthile.
Ngaphandle kwalokho, a umlingani onokuzethemba kuhlale kunamathuba amaningi okuthi uzicekele phansi ubudlelwano. Umuzwa wokuthi umuntu akalungile ngokwanele noma akakufanelekeli ukuthandwa uba inhlamvu ezimweni ezinjalo. UJayant uthi, “Abantu abanokuzenyeza nomuzwa wokungafaneleki ukuthandwa othile.” Bacabanga, “Umuntu engithandana naye uzoqaphela ukuthi ngingumkhohlisi. Bazocabanga ukuthi angifaneleki, ukuthi angiyena umuntu omuhle kangako”.
Ukwesaba okuholela ebudlelwaneni bothando obuzilimazayo kungavela ebudlelwaneni obungaphumeleli bangaphambilini. Abanye abantu benza lezi zinto ngoba ukuba sengozini kuyethusa, ngakho bagcina bebhidliza ubudlelwano. Kodwa ukuba sengozini nokusondelana ngokomzwelo nabalingani bethu kubalulekile ekwenzeni ubudlelwano busebenze. Njengoba ubona, konke kubilisa ekwesabeni ukwephulwa kwenhliziyo yethu. Kuwumkhuba oyisisekelo womuntu ukugwema ubuhlungu.
Ukufunda Okuhlobene: Imithwalo Engokomzwelo - Ukuthi Isho Ukuthini Nendlela Yokuqeda
Izimpawu Zokuziphatha Okuzilimazayo
UJayant ukhuluma ngendlela abantu abacekela phansi ngayo ubudlelwano babo. “Ukhetha umuntu ongakufanelanga noma ongafanelani nawe ngoba ungafuni ukuzibophezela nokuzinza, enye indlela yokuzicekela phansi wukubuyela amagqubu ebudlelwaneni obuphindaphindayo, uba nohlu lwezinto ezisuke zingahambi kahle noma ezingahambi kahle, uze uveze nezinto ezingeke zilungiswe njengokuthi ubuwazi kusukela eqala umshado noma umndeni wakhe.
“Ukwesaba ukushintsha usuka kwesinye isigaba sempilo uye kwesilandelayo kwenza abantu bacekele phansi ubudlelwano. umthwalo wemfanelo wezezimali - nokwesaba ukuthi umuntu uzoba umzali omuhle noma cha. Kungase futhi kube nezinkinga zokwethembana ngomlingani womuntu.
"Uma uke wakhohliswa phambilini, uzothatha ngokuthi lo mlingani uzokopela nawe. Ngakho-ke, uqhubeka uziphatha ngaleyo nkolelo ebudlelwaneni. Iba yisiprofetho esizigcwalisayo. Bese kuba khona abanye abantu abasaba ukulahlekelwa ubuthina babo. Abanye abafuni ukuziphendulela kunoma ubani, bafuna ukuphila impilo yabo futhi bangahlangabezane nezidingo zanoma ubani."
Lokhu kuziphatha kuvame kakhulu, futhi abantu abaningi bayaqhubeka nokuzilimaza ubudlelwano bothando ngaphandle kokuqaphela ukuthi inkinga ingaphakathi. Uma uke waba nochungechunge lobudlelwano obuhlulekile esikhathini esidlule, kuyasiza ukubuza ukuthi kungenxa yalokhu kuthambekela okucashile. Nazi izimpawu zokuziphatha kokuzilimaza okufanele uziqaphele:
- Ukugwema imizwa engemihle: Ukungabhekani nentukuthelo, ukucasuka, ukungabaza, noma ukukhungatheka ngomlingani wakho noma ubudlelwano kuyifulegi elikhulu elibomvu
- I-Paranoia: Ukungabaza ukuthi umlingani wakho wenza okuthile okungalungile ngaphandle kwesisekelo noma ubufakazi. Ngokwesibonelo, umuntu onokuthambekela kokuzicekela phansi angase aqiniseke ukuthi umlingani wakhe uyamkhohlisa ngisho noma kungekho bufakazi noma amafulege abomvu asikisela lokho.
- Okubalulekile kozakwethu: Uma ugxile ekushiyekeni nasekungaphelelini komlingani wakho ngaso sonke isikhathi, futhi uvumela lo mbono udlule zonke izimfanelo zakhe ezinhle namasudi aqinile, khona-ke ungase ucekele phansi ubuhlobo ngokungazi.
- Ukusetshenziswa kabi kwezidakamizwa: Ukuthembela emikhubeni engenampilo njengokuphuza ngokweqile, ukubhema, noma ukusebenzisa izidakamizwa njengendlela yokubhekana nokungazethembi kuwuphawu olucacile lokuziphatha kokuzilimaza.
- Ukwelashwa buthule: Ukusebenzisa udlame lokuthula ekulweni ikakhulukazi ngoba ukuxhumana okuqotho akuzi ngokwemvelo kuwe
- Ukubamba amagqubu: Uma ungakwazi ukudedela ukungezwani okudlule futhi uqhubeke nokubambela intukuthelo isithandwa sakho isikhathi eside ngemva kokuphela kwengxabano noma ingxoxo, kuyindlela eqinisekile yokuzibhidliza ubudlelwano.
- Ukugwema ukuzibophezela: Enye inkomba ebalulekile yokuthi ungase ucekele phansi ubudlelwano ngenxa yokwesaba ukuthi ususa ukugxila ebudlelwaneni bakho bese uqala ukubeka phambili umsebenzi, ubungane, noma izinto zokuzilibazisa lapho izinto ziqala ukuba namandla.
- Ukuphula izithembiso: Ukuhlehla ngamabomu ezithembisweni zokutshala imali ebudlelwaneni noma izinhlelo zokuchitha isikhathi esiningi ndawonye. Awugcini nje ngokumosha ubudlelwano kodwa wenza nomaqondana wakho akucasukele ngakho. Ngokwenza kanjalo, ubeka isisekelo sokuzibhidliza ubudlelwano
Ukufunda Okuhlobene: Okwenziwa Lesi Sazi Sengqondo Lapho Ethi, “Umyeni Akanginaki”
Ungakugwema Kanjani Ukuzilimaza Ubudlelwano Bakho?
Sibuze uJayant ukuthi ngabe umuntu uyazi yini ngokuziphatha kwakhe kokuzilimaza nganoma iyiphi indlela. Uthi, "Cha, abaqapheli. Wonke umuntu angabona iphethini yabo ngokucacile, kodwa umuntu akanaki. Ukubona amaphethini abo abhubhisayo kufana nokubamba isibuko. Ubani ozosala enecala? Bona ngokwabo. Ngakho, ukungaqapheli. Ukwelashwa kokukhuluma kuyasiza ekuletheni ukunaka emaphethini akho, kuyasiza ekwandiseni lokhu kuqwashisa okubalulekile.”
Ekhuluma ngendlela yokugwema ukuzicekela phansi ubudlelwano benu, uMeghna uthi, "Into esemqoka ukuqonda ukuthi yini ebangela lokho. Kufanele uthole isizathu sokwesaba futhi ubhekane nakho. Lokhu kungenziwa ngokuzihlola noma ngokufika emnyombeni ngokukhuluma nomelaphi ukuze uthole ukwelashwa komuntu ngamunye noma kwabashadile." Ukuthola umnyombo wenkinga iyona ndlela kuphela ongayeka ngayo ubudlelwano obuzilimazayo. Ngakho-ke, ake sizame ukucacisa ukuthi yini ongayenza ukuze ugweme ukuzicekela phansi ubudlelwano bakho.
1. Qonda indlela yokunamathisela ukuze uyeke ukuzilimaza ubudlelwano
Uma ubulokhu uzabalaza ukugcina ubudlelwano besikhathi eside, kuyasiza ukuthi uphendulele ukunaka kwakho kwisitayela sakho sokunamathiselwe. Ngokuvamile, indlela esinamathela ngayo kwabanye njengabantu abadala iwukubonakaliswa kokuhlangenwe nakho kwethu kwasebuntwaneni noma kokuthomba. Umuntu oke washiywa, ehlukumezekile, elahlekelwe, noma enobuthi eminyakeni yakhe yokuqala angase akhule athuthukise indlela yokunamathisela engavikelekile.
Lokhu kungaholela emizweni enjengomona nentukuthelo, futhi uma ungazi ukuthi wenze kanjani bhekana nomona noma ukucasuka kwakho, kungaholela ekuzicekeleni phansi ubudlelwano bothando. Ngokufanayo, ukukhulela endaweni ebandayo neyodwa kungenza umuntu adinge ukuqinisekiswa nokunakwa. Lena iphethini yakudala yozakwethu onokuzethemba okuphansi, umuntu oklanyelwe ukucekela phansi ubudlelwano babo bothando ngokukhathaza omunye umuntu ngezidingo zakhe ezihlala njalo.
Ngenkathi ekhuluma ngokukhathazeka nobudlelwano obuzilimazayo, u-Jayant ubeka iphuzu ngomlando wezingane nokuthi esibhekana nakho njengengane kuthinta kanjani ukuqonda kwethu ubudlelwano. "Umlando womuntu siqu wokuhlukumezeka kwasebuntwaneni ukhawulela umbono wethu wezwe. Asinakho ukuqonda ngezwe ngale kwalokho esikubona njengezingane. Wenza ubudlelwano obunobuthi bezingane zakho bube bujwayelekile futhi ulingise kamuva ezimweni zabantu abadala.
Uma umkhaya wakini uhlukumeza, noma uye wakunaka njengomntwana, uqaphela ukuthi lokho akuphilile uma usuthole ukuchayeka kahle emindenini yezinye izingane. Khona-ke uyaqonda ukuthi kunenye indlela yokuphila nothando. Ngakho, imibono eyisisekelo yobuhlobo bethu isuka ebuntwaneni bethu, isikhathi lapho sinezingqondo ezithatheka kalula.
Konke lokhu kungenza umuntu aqhubeke nokucekela phansi ubudlelwano ngenxa yokwesaba nokuhlukumezeka. Nokho, izitayela zokunamathisela akuzona unomphela. Ngosizo olufanele, ungazisebenzela futhi uqede amaphethini angalungile ukuze ukwazi ukwakha ubudlelwano bothando obuchumayo.
2. Zibophezele ekukhulumeni ngokwethembeka
Esinye sezithiyo ezinkulu kumuntu othambekele ekucekeleni phansi ubudlelwano enganakile ukwesaba ukuxhumana. Ikakhulukazi, uma kuziwa ekukhulumeni ngezici ezingajabulisi kangako zobudlelwano. Ngakho-ke, ukuze unqamule umjikelezo wokuziphatha kokuzilimaza, udinga ukukunqoba lokhu inkinga yokuxhumana.
Indlela engcono kakhulu yokukwenza iwukuqala ingxoxo mayelana nokwesaba kwakho, okukukhathazayo, ukungabaza, nezinkathazo zakho. Ngokwenza kanjalo, yazisa umlingani wakho konke obekukukhathaza ngekusasa lobudlelwano futhi udale indawo lapho angenza khona okufanayo. Xoxa ngezinkinga zakho futhi uthole indlela engcono kakhulu yenu nobabili. Ningazivumeli izinkinga zinqwabelene isikhathi eside kangangokuthi ukungezwani phakathi kwenu nobabili kungalungiseki.
U-Jayant uyanezela, "Ukuze uyeke ukucekela phansi ubudlelwano ngenxa yokwesaba, enye indlela yokuxhumana ngokwethembeka okudingeka ube nayo ngawe ngokwakho. Kudingeka a) wamukele ukuthi unephethini lokuzicekela phansi, futhi b) uqonde amaphethini akho. Hlala phansi ucabange ukuthi yini eyesaba kakhulu. Zibuze ukuthi ngabe ubungena ngamabomu yini ubudlelwano obunabo amafulegi abomvu okufanele akuthumele ukuthi usebenze.
"Sebenzisa ubuhlobo bakho nawe kuqala. Phinda futhi imigomo yakho kanye nezindinganiso zakho, futhi uzibuze imibuzo eyisisekelo mayelana nokuthi ungubani: Ngingubani? Iyini imigomo yami? Ngizibona kanjani mina? Bese ucabanga ngalokho okudingayo nalokho okufunayo. Lezi yizinto ezimbili ezihlukene. Geza ukuthi zihambisana yini."
3. Khomba imbangeli yakho yokuyeka ubudlelwano obuzilimazayo
Ukuze ukwazi ukumisa ubudlelwano obuzilimazayo, udinga ukuqonda ukuthi bubangelwa yini. Ngakho-ke, qala ngokunaka izibangeli zakho. Uma ngokungazelelwe uzwa isidingo sokunqamula intambo ngoba wesaba kakhulu ukuthi izinto zingase zingaphumeleli njengoba bekulindelekile, cabanga kancane ngokuthi yini ebangele lokho kwesaba.
Ubukusiphi isimo? Kukwenze wazizwa kanjani? Kungani ikwesabisa? Uma ukwesaba kwakho kwenzeka, kungakuthinta kanjani? Kungumqondo omuhle ukuqala ukugcina irekhodi lalezi zikhathi kanye nokuhlola kwakho ngazo. Ngokuhamba kwesikhathi, uzoqala ukubona iphethini futhi lokho kuzokusiza ukuthi uxhumane nobuthakathaka bakho kangcono.
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4. Funda ukubekezela uma ungaqondi ubhidliza ubudlelwano
Noma nini lapho umuntu ebhidliza ubudlelwano, kuba nephethini ecacile ngemuva kwabo - ubudlelwano budlula endaweni embi futhi banquma ukuhoxa ngokomzwelo ukuze bazisindise ekulimaleni. Okubalulekile lapha wukukhumbula ukuthi abukho ubudlelwano obungenasici, abukho ubudlelwano obulula. Nakanjani kuzoba nokwehla nokwenyuka.
Kuyisinqumo sokuhlala nokulwela ukuba ndawonye kwenu okwenza ubudlelwano buqhubeke. Ngakho-ke, kufanele ufunde izindlela zokubekezela futhi unamathele kumlingani wakho lapho ukuhamba kuba nzima. Kuyasiza ukwakha uhlelo lokusekela ukuze udlule kulezi zikhathi zezinxushunxushu ngaphandle kokukhathazeka ngokuthi umhlaba wakho wonke uzophahlazeka.
5. Funa ukwelulekwa ukuze ugweme ukuzicekela phansi ubudlelwano bakho
Ukubona nokwamukela ukuziphatha kwakho okungenampilo akulula neze. Ngisho noma ungayingeni inkinga, ungase ungazi ukuthi ungayibhekana kanjani nayo. Yingakho i-Bonobology inikeza ngabanye futhi izeluleko zabashadileng njengoba zingaba izindlela ezithembekile zokugwema ukuzicekela phansi ubudlelwano bakho. Kunikeza wena nophathina wakho indawo ephephile nesekelayo ukuze nixoxe ngokukukhathazayo. Ngaphandle kwalokho, umelaphi oqeqeshiwe angakubonisa indlela yokunqamula umjikelezo wokuzilimaza ubudlelwano ngendlela enozwela nengenakwahlulela.
U-Jayant uthi, “Ungangena endaweni yokwelapha ngokusho izinto ezinjengokuthi, “Ubudlelwano bami abathathu bokugcina abuzange buphumelele” noma “Umhlaba uyangilimaza.” Umuntu angase abuze udokotela: Ngikuyeka kanjani ukuzicekela phansi ubudlelwano bami obusha? Umelaphi ube esehlola zonke izimo zakhe zesikhathi esidlule futhi abone amatimu avamile ngenqubo kancane kancane. Uyakuqondisa ukuze uthathe la maphethini futhi akusize uhlole ngokucophelela.
“Ekuqaleni, njengoba uqaphela amaphethini akho, uzozivikela.Kudinga isibindi ukuyeka imaski kanye noku thembeka kuwe ngokwakho. Sizikhohlisa kahle impela. Njengoba licwila, kuba nomuzwa wokulahlekelwa nokuzisola ngesikhathi esichithiwe, nezinto esezidlule kuwe.
“Uzizwa uthukuthele.” Ungase ucabange, “Ngaphuthelwa lobo buhlobo obake baba khona ekuphileni kwami” noma “ngamosha ubungane bami” noma “Ngeke ngiphinde ngimthole umuntu onjengalona.” Njengoba labo bantu sebethuthile, lokhu kungase kubangele intukuthelo nosizi. Umelaphi angakusiza ukucubungula le mizwa. Inqobo nje uma uzibophezele ekuzisebenzeleni, ungakwazi ukuphindela emuva kulokhu kuziphatha okulimazayo futhi ulondoloze ubudlelwano bakho obusha.
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6. Ungajahi ukungena ebudlelwaneni
Uchungechunge lobudlelwano obungaphumeleli lungashiya noma ubani ezizwa edangele, edangele, futhi egugile. Kodwa ungajahi ubudlelwano ngokulangazelela kwakho ukuze buphumelele. Ngokwesibonelo, ungaqali ukuthandana nomuntu olandelayo oshisayo ohlangana naye endaweni yokucima ukoma ngosuku ngemva kokuphuma ebuhlotsheni, ukuze nje uzizwe ungcono ngawe.
Nokho obunye ubuhlobo obungalungile buzonezela ekwesabeni kwakho okungokwemvelo kokulinyazwa noma ukushiywa ngemuva. Lokhu, kuzokwandisa ukuthambekela kwakho ekuzibhidlizeni ubudlelwano bothando. Uma usuqaphela ukuthi ukuziphatha kwakho kuyingxenye yenkinga, zinike isikhathi sokubheka ukuthi ufuna umlingani onjani. Khona-ke, ngokubekezela ulinde umuntu ofanele ukuba ahambe.
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7. Yeka ukudlala isisulu
Uma kubhekwa ukuthi abantu ababonisa ukuziphatha kokuzilimaza basebenza endaweni yokwesaba futhi ngokuvamile baphenduka umlingani onokuzethemba okuphansi, kulula kakhulu ukuba bagibele ngokuzidabukela. Kufanele uyeke ukudlala ikhadi lesisulu ukuze uzikhulule kule phethini yobudlelwano bothando obuzilimaza wena.
Umbono wonke othi 'ngimpofu' uzokhulisa ukungazethembi kwakho. Lokhu, futhi, kuzoba amaphethini eqhwa anzima njengokuzihlukanisa ngokomzwelo, ukudlala i-snowball i-passive-aggressive umdlalo onosuku, nokwenza intshisekelo yothando igxume phakathi kwama-hoops ukuze uqinisekise umuzwa wakho wokulawula. Usubonile ukuthi lokho kuholela kuphi.
Ngakho-ke, gxila emandleni akho esikhundleni salokho. Sebenzela ekubeni inguqulo ozethembayo futhi ozithembayo ngawe. Umuntu ongadingi ukuzizwa elawula ubudlelwano ngaso sonke isikhathi. Uma wenza lezi zinguquko, uzobona ukuthi ungatshala imali ngokomzwelo ebudlelwaneni kalula kakhulu.
8. Okubaluleke kakhulu, funda ukuhlukanisa nokwedlule
Ukuthambekela kokucekela phansi ubudlelwano ngokungazi kuhlobene kakhulu nezinto ezidlule ezingemnandi noma ezihlukumezayo. Ukwesaba nokukhathazeka okuzwayo kungase kubangelwa isigameko noma uchungechunge lwezehlakalo ezikuthinte ngokujulile. Lokhu okuhlangenwe nakho, noma okungenani indlela umuntu azizwa ngayo phakathi nalezo zenzakalo, bese kuba yizicupha zokuziphatha kokuzilimaza. Kufanele ufunde ukunqamula intambo futhi yenza ukuthula nokwedlule kwakho.
Ngokuzayo lapho uzizwa ucasulwa yisimo esithile, yima kancane futhi ucabange ukuthi ingabe isenzakalo esidlule esikwenza usabele ngendlela engafanele yini. Kungase kungasebenzi ngaso sonke isikhathi, kodwa ukuqaphela lokhu kungenzeka kukusiza ukuthi uye emaphethini okuziphatha anempilo. Iphethini yobudlelwano obuzilimazayo ingaba yinto ekhubazayo kodwa hhayi leyo okumele uhlale nayo. Uma usufunde ukubona nokuvuma inkinga, kunenqwaba yezindlela zokuyilungisa nokuyinqoba. Uma udonsa kanzima ukuze uzenzele ngokwakho, yazi ukuthi ukufuna usizo lochwepheshe kuyisenzo sokuzinakekela.
Kubantu abazibuzayo, "Ingabe lokhu kuzogcina kungisizile ukuyeka ukuzilimaza ubudlelwano bami obusha?", u-Jayant ufuna ukwazi lokhu: "Uma wazi amaphethini akho, ukukhetha kwakho kuzoshintsha, futhi okulindele kuwe nakubantu abaseduze nawe kuzokwenzeka. Uzoxhuma amachashazi esikhathi esedlule bese uvula isahluko esisha. Kukhona ithemba."
Imibuzo Evame Ukubuzwa
Into yokuqala okudingeka uyenze ukubheka isipiliyoni sakho esidlule. Kungaba ubungane obunobuthi noma uchungechunge lobudlelwano obuphukile obudala izinkinga zokuzilimaza. Ukuze uyeke ukuzicekela phansi ubudlelwano bakho, khomba izimbangela, uthembeke futhi ukhulume, funa ukwelulekwa, futhi ubekezele.
Sebenza ekususeni ukukhathazeka, i-phobia yokuzibophezela, nokungavikeleki okukuholela kukho push donsa ubudlelwano. Yeka ukudlala ikhadi lesisulu futhi uzihlukanise nokwakudala. Ungajahi ukungena ebudlelwaneni, kunalokho thatha isikhathi sakho wazi ukuthi ufunani kumuntu othandana naye.
Uyazi ukuthi uyazibhidliza ubudlelwano uma uzenzela wena kuphela, umgxeka kakhulu isithandwa sakho, futhi uba nexhala nokungazethembi uma izinto zibheda phakathi kwenu nobabili. Unezinkinga zokwethembana, ucabanga ngokweqile, futhi awukwazi ukudedela okwedlule.
Izindlela Ezi-5 Zokwethembeka Kuwena Zizokusiza Uqonde Ubudlelwano Bakho Kangcono
Umnikelo wakho awuhlanganisi inhlangano esiza abantulayo umnikelo. Izovumela i-Bonobology ukuthi iqhubeke nokukulethela ulwazi olusha nolwakamuva emzamweni wethu wokusiza noma ubani emhlabeni ukuthi afunde ukwenza noma yini.