Rārangi Arowhai mō te Tūkino Hinengaro – 18 Ngā Tohu Whakangaromanga

Ko te whanaungatanga tukino kare ā-roto he whanaungatanga e mau tonu ana te tukino me te whakahaere i ngā whanonga. Kei te whakamahi tonu te kaitukino i te mana whakahaere i runga i tana patunga, ā, ka whakamahia te whakama, te hara, te wehi, te whakatoi, me te whakahē hei whakatutuki i tana e pai ai. Ka taea tēnei te tupu mā roto i ngā mahi, i ngā kupu rānei, ā, ka kino haere i te roanga o te wā. I te mutunga, ka angitu te kaitukino ki te whakaiti i te hauora hinengaro o tana patunga. 

A rangahau I whakaputaina e te United States Center for Disease Control and Prevention ētahi tatauranga whakamiharo: 48.4% o ngā wāhine me te 48.8% o ngā tāne kua pāngia e te tukino kare ā-roto/hinengaro e tā rātou hoa i roto i ō rātou oranga. 

E ai ki te kaimätai hinengaro Nandita Rambhia (M.Sc. Psychology), he kaiwhakaora hinengaro me te kaiārahi tauira, kei roto i te rārangi arowhai mō te tukino kare ā-roto ngā kare ā-roto o te iti o te whakaaro ki a ia anō, te mokemoke, me te kore whakapono ki a ia anō. Ka taea e tēnei te arahi ki te maha o ngā raruraru hauora hinengaro pēnei i te manukanuka, te pouri, me ētahi atu. Me kōrero anō tātou mō tēnei take e horapa haere ana.

He aha te Tukino Hinengaro? 

Ko te pātai me pātai atu koe ki a koe anō, he aha te āhua o te tangata nei ki a koe? Mā te pāngia e tetahi momo tukino kare ā-roto ka arahi pea ki ngā kare ā-roto o te pouri, te koretake, te pouri, te manukanuka, te mamae, me te pōhēhē. I te mea he maha ngā wā ka ngawari, ka tinihanga hoki te whanonga tukino kare ā-roto, ko te āhua o ō taunekeneke ki a koe te mea ka āwhina i a koe. kia tūpato ki ngā haki whero, kia tūpato. He māmā ake i ētahi wā te whakakorekore i ngā wheako mamae me te mea he "kāore i te kino rawa" ka rapu whakamārama mō te kaipahua. 

nandita e kī ana, "Ko te āhua kino o te tukino kare ā-roto, he maha ngā wā, he onge noa iho te āhua o te tukino tinana. He pānga kare ā-roto, he pānga ā-roto hoki ngā pānga, nō reira he uaua ki te kite, ki te ine rānei mō ētahi atu. Ahakoa he maha ngā wā ka puta te tukino kare ā-roto me ētahi atu momo tukino, ka taea hoki te puta motuhake i roto i te whanaungatanga." Ka taea e koe te tirotiro i te rārangi arowhai tukino kare ā-roto i roto i tēnei tuhinga, te kimi rānei i ētahi atu i runga ipurangi, hei whakatau mēnā he tukino kare ā-roto tō whanaungatanga, kāore rānei.  

He aha i puta ai te tukino kare ā-roto? 

He maha ngā ngā take i tautokona e ngā tohunga mō te tangata kia tahuri ki ngā tauira whanonga tukino. Waihoki, he iti noa te tūponotanga kāore te tangata e whara ana i a koe e mōhio ana ki te pānga o ā rātou kupu, o ā rātou mahi rānei. Ko te hihiri ki te whara i a koe i roto i te hinengaro ka puta mai i ngā mate hinengaro, i ō rātou ake hītori o te tukino hinengaro, te tukino tinana rānei. He uaua pea te hiahia ki te whakahaere whanonga me ngā kēmu hinengaro, engari he mea nui kia mārama kāore he whakamārama mō te tukino i roto i te hinengaro. 

Rārangi Arowhai mō te Tūkino Hinengaro – 18 Ngā Tohu Whakangaromanga 

E kī ana a Nandita, "He mea nui kia hoki whakamuri koe i te wā tonu e puta ai, kia mōhio ai koe ki ngā mea e whakaoho ana i aua whanonga tukino. He taahiraa nui te whai i tētahi rārangi arowhai tukino kare ā-roto me te aro atu ki te mooni. Ae, he uaua te tukanga o te aro atu ki te mooni engari me tupu. E tika ana kia whiwhi koe i ngā rohe hauora me tō hoa. "

Mā te rārangi arowhai mō te tukino kare ā-roto koe (me ō hoa, whānau rānei) e āwhina ki te whakatau mēnā kei roto koe i tētahi whanaungatanga tukino kare ā-roto. Kia maumahara kāore koe e hiahia kia kitea ngā tohu 'katoa' hei kī he tukino kare ā-roto. Ahakoa he torutoru noa ngā whakautu pai ki ngā pātai i raro nei, ka taea te tohu i tētahi raruraru me tētahi whanaungatanga tukino pea. He tika tō te katoa ki te harikoa, ki te hoa, ki te whakawhirinaki, me te aroha; kaua tetahi e meinga kia iti ake tō tika ki ēnei tika taketake. 

Pātai atu ki a koe anō ēnei pātai i roto i te rārangi arowhai mō te tūkino kare ā-roto i raro nei, kia mōhio ai koe mēnā kei roto koe i tētahi whanaungatanga tūkino kare ā-roto: 

1. Kei te tawai tonu tō hoa i a koe, kei te whakatoi tonu, kei te tawai rānei? 
2. E hae ana rātou ki ō hoa, ki tō whānau, tae atu ki tāu mōkai? 
3. He iti ake rānei ō hoa me ō hoa mahi e taunekeneke ana koe i a koe e whanake haere ana tō whanaungatanga hou? 
4. Kei te whakaaro koe kei te te hikoi i runga i ngā anga hua manu i te taha o tō hoa me te ngana kia kaua e mahi i tetahi mea hei whakapataritari i a rātou? 
5. E kī ana tō hoa he nui ake tōna mōhiotanga, tōna mātauranga rānei i a koe? 
6. Kei te pāngia koe e ngā mate - he iti, he nui rānei? 
7. E whakapono ana koe kāore koe e ora me te kore tō whanaungatanga? 
8. Kei te meinga koe e tō hoa kia whakaaro ko koe te porangi, ina koa ka tū atu koe ki a ia? 
9. E whakapono ana koe ko koe anake te mea ka taea te āwhina i tō hoa rangatira ki te whakaoti rapanga? 
10. I muri i tētahi wā tukino, kei te pupuhihia koe e te aroha me te ngākau aroha? 
11. Kei te pōhēhē koe he aha te tikanga o te aroha pono? 
12. Ahakoa kei roto koe i tētahi whanaungatanga, kei te tino mokemoke koe?

Te pānui e pā ana: Te Mokemoke i roto i te Hononga - 15 Ngā Tohutohu hei Whakatutuki i te Moe

Kia ruku hohonu tātou ki tēnei rārangi arowhai mō te tukino kare ā-roto, kia mārama ai ki ngā tohu. Kia maumahara, kotahi, e rua rānei, he maha rānei ngā mea ka pā ki a koe, engari ko ēnei katoa he tohu mō te whakaaro ka huri pea tēnei hei whanaungatanga kino, ki te kore e āraia. 

1. Ka whakahengia tonutia koe, ka whakahēngia rānei i roto i tētahi whanaungatanga tukino kare ā-roto

Tērā pea ka pāngia koe e te tukino ā-waha me te kare ā-roto e te ringa o te tangata e arohaina ana e koe, ā, kāore koe e aro nui ki tēnā kia pāngia rā anō koe e te mamae nui. He mea hou tēnei ako mō ngā whanaungatanga tukino ā-hinengaro, i whakatauhia ko te whakahē tētahi o ngā whakaaturanga tino kitea o te tukino hinengaro. Ko te mea nui o te rārangi o ngā wāhanga o te whakahē ko te mātauranga (17.9%), te pūtea (17.6%), me te āhua tinana (14.6%).  

Ko ngā āhuatanga o taua tukino kare ā-roto ko ēnei e whai ake nei:

• Te whakaiti i a koe i mua i te aroaro o ētahi atu
• Ngā katakata i tō utu
• Ngā kōrero whakatoi
• Te nui rawa o te whakaaro mō āu mahi, kōrero, whakaaro rānei
• Te arotake i ō whiringa oranga

2. Ka takahia, ka warewarehia rānei ō rohe i ia wā 

He tika tō te katoa ki te noho motuhake. I roto i tētahi whanaungatanga hou, i te tīmatanga o te aroha me te kukume i te moepuku, tera pea he uaua ki te whakatakoto i aua rohe. Heoi, ki te mea kei te ahua takahia tonutia tō wāhi, ka taea e koe te āhua kua mauheretia koe i roto i te whanaungatanga, ki te mea rānei kei te tere rawa te neke o ngā mea, whakawhirinaki ki ō kare ā-roto ka kōrero, whakaroa rānei. 

Me haere koe mēnā kāore e taea te whakatika i te āhuatanga. Heoi, ka tāpiri atu a Nandita, "Engari, mō te tini o te tangata, he mea nui te ngana ki te whakapakari i tō rātou whanaungatanga. He maha ngā take e ngana ana ki te mahi i tēnei - nā ngā tumanakohanga a te hapori, nā te mea he tamariki ā rātou, nā te whakawhirinaki ki te taha pūtea, nā te hauora ngoikore, nā te hauātanga rānei, nā te mea e aroha ana rātou ki tā rātou hoa, me ētahi atu. Ka ngana te patunga ki te whakatika i te whanaungatanga me te tumanako ka kite tā rātou hoa i te mea e tupu ana, ā, ka ngana ki te whakatika."

3. E manaakitia ana koe me he taonga

Ahakoa ngā momo tukino kare ā-roto ngawari Ahakoa kāore pea e puta he tūkino tinana, he mahi tūkino ā-ira rānei, ka taea tonu e tō hoa te whakawhāiti i ō whanonga me ō kare ā-roto. Ngā whakaekenga o te hae nui rawa, te waea tonu mai me te tirotiro kei hea koe, me te riri mēnā kei te hiahia koe ki te noho ko koe anake, ki te noho tahi rānei me ō hoa – ka mahia katoatia ēnei hei wehe i a koe, hei pupuri hoki i a koe i raro i tā rātou mana whakahaere.  

4. Kei te whakaaro koe kei te whakahaerehia koe 

Hei whakahaere i a koe, ka tangohia pea e te kaipahua tō aroha, ka wareware rānei ki a koe maimoatanga puku, ka takoto rānei i runga i te whakama kia ruarua ai koe i a koe anō me ō whiringa. Ki te kōrero koe, ka tawaihia koe, ka kataina, ka kino ake rānei tō wairua. Ka tupu ngā whanaungatanga tukino kare ā-roto i runga i ngā kare ā-roto o te iti o te whakaaro ki a ia anō me te iti o te whakapono ki a ia anō o te patunga. Ka puta he raruraru tonu tēnei e kore e taea e te patunga te mawhiti i tēnei huringa kino. 

5. Ka panaia koe, ka kore hoki e arohia 

Ki te mea kei te whakaaro koe kāore koe i te arohia, kāore i te tino maiohahia, kāore rānei koe i te whakapaehia mō tētahi take, he tohu katoa ēnei i te rārangi arowhai mō te tukino kare ā-roto. Ina whakaitihia e tō hoa ō whakatutukitanga, ina kore rānei e whakaae ki te kawenga mō ā rātou mahi, kua tae ki te wā ki te aro atu.     

Te pānui e pā ana: Me pēhea te whakatau i te kore aro o tētahi e arohaina ana e koe?

6. He nui rawa ngā mea e tumanakohia ana mai i a koe 

Hei tauira mō te tukino kare ā-roto, ko te nui rawa o ngā tono a te kaitukino i a koe. E tumanako ana rātou kia waiho e koe ngā mea katoa ki te taha, kia whakatutuki hoki i ana hiahia. Ahakoa te nui o tāu mahi, kāore e ranea ki te titiro a te kaitukino. 

7. He maha ngā wā ka hurihia te tēpu ki a koe 

Ina whakapuaki noa koe i a koe anō, ina tono rānei koe i ētahi mea, e whakapaetia ana koe he piri rawa koe me te tono nui. Mā ngā whanaungatanga tukino kare ā-roto koe e whakapono he tangata apo taonga koe, ā, he rerekē ngā whakaaro me ngā mahi ki te āhua o te tangata nana koe i tukino. 

8. He pōrearea te ao mēnā ka tukinotia koe e tō hoa

Ka tino pōrearea te noho tahi me te hoa tukino. Ko tētahi wāhanga o tēnei ko te āhua tautohetohe me te tinihanga o te kaipahua. Ka taea hoki te puta mai i ngā huringa ohorere o te wairua me te riri ohorere. Ahakoa kāore pea he tutu ā-whare, he whara tinana rānei, ko te noho i roto i te whanaungatanga tukino kare ā-roto ka meinga koe kia whakama, kia wehi hoki kei mahi koe i tetahi mea hei whakapataritari i tō hoa. 

E mea ana a Nandita, "Ki te tae koe ki tēnei wā, pātai atu ki a koe anō: Kei te hiahia koe kia noho tonu i te wā tukino; kei te hiahia koe kia pai ake te whanaungatanga mā te tautoko, te āwhina ngaio, me ngā kōrero uaua; kei te hiahia rānei koe kia wehe atu i te whanaungatanga?"

9. He huarahi ora te whakatoi kare ā-roto 

Ki te mea kei te whakamahi tonu tetahi i te whakatoi kare ā-roto hei huarahi whakahaere i a koe, he tohu tēnei mō te tukino kare ā-roto. Ko ētahi tauira o te tukino kare ā-roto ko:

• Te whakama e whakararu ana i a koe i ia wā ka mahi koe i tetahi mea 'hē'
• Te tawai i a koe, te whakaatu i ō hapa i te aroaro o te marea
• Te whakahaere i te āhuatanga me te whakamahi i ō ngoikoretanga ki a koe
• Te whakakore i ngā hapa me te huri i te āhuatanga hei whakapae i a koe 

Te pānui e pā ana: He aha te kaiwhakatoi whanaungatanga, ā, e 5 ngā tohu e whakaatu ana kei te pāngia koe e te tukino

10. He tangata tino kino te tangata e tūkino ana i a koe 

Ki te whakamanamana tonu tō hoa mō āna whakatutukitanga, mō tōna mātauranga rānei, ā, ka whakaiti i a koe, he tūponotanga he whanaungatanga tukino kare ā-roto. Ka whakapono te hunga tukino he pai ake rātou i ētahi atu, ā, ka taea e rātou te kite i ngā mea kāore e taea e koe te kite. Ka whakapau kaha rātou ki te whakaatu he hē koe, ā, ka tohe tonu he koretake, he kore tautoko hoki ō whakaaro me ō kare ā-roto. 

11. E noho mokemoke ana koe 

Ina pāngia koe e te tukino kare ā-roto, ka tino mokemoke koe, ka motu ke hoki. Tērā pea ka puta mai tēnei i:

• Kei te whaiwhai tō hoa i ō pāpāho pāpori ngā pūkete, te whai rānei i tō tauwāhi mā te GPS 
• Te aro turuki pakari i ō mahi me ō wāhi noho
• He hae e ara ake ana i ngā wā katoa e haere tahi ana koe me ō hoa, me tō whānau rānei 
• Te tono kia noho tahi kōrua i te wā katoa 
• Te whakahaere i ngā take pūtea katoa me te whakahaere i te moni katoa i roto i tō whanaungatanga, ā, ka tangohia tō herekoretanga pūtea

12. Kei te anga atu koe ki te mura hau 

Ki te whakakahore tonu tō hoa i tāu kōrero, ki te tohe rānei kāore ngā mea i rite ki tāu i kōrero ai, he whakahāwea noa iho tā rātou i a koe. Ko te noho tahi me tētahi e pātai ana i ō maharatanga me tō hauora hinengaro he ara pahekeheke ki te whara hinengaro. 

E mea ana a Nandita, "I konei, ka tīmata te tangata i tukinotia ki te ruarua i a ia anō, ka ngaro tōna whakapono ki a ia anō mā te haere tonu te mahi tahi me tētahi hoa mahi hau"I ētahi wā, e whakaaro ana rātou me te mea he tika kia tukinotia kinotia rātou, ka hua ake he mamae hohonu. Ko te wehe atu i tētahi whanaungatanga kino pēnei me nui te maia, te tautoko pāpori, te whakaaroaro arohaehae, me te pono."

13. Ka huna e te kaitukino te aroha 

Ka pā kino ki te hauora hinengaro o te tangata ina whakakahoretia te aroha mai i tētahi e noho tahi ana rāua. Anei ngā huarahi rerekē ka taea e te tangata tukino te pupuri i te aroha:

• Kāore rātou e pai ki te whakaatu i te aroha, ā, ka kore tonu pea e pai ki te moe tāne i ngā wā katoa ka tīmatahia e koe. 
• E kiia ana koe he piripono, he tono nui hoki, nā te mea e hiahia ana koe ki ngā awhi me te wā kounga. 
• E tohe ana rātou he pukumahi rawa rātou, kāore e taea te whakarongo ki ō 'tono'
• Ko rātou te kaiwhakahaere o tō āhua tinana, me te hunga e tūtaki ai koe i raro i te āhua o te 'tiaki i a koe'

14. Me aro atu koe ki ō rātou wairua whakakatakata kino 

He maha ngā wā karekau he wairua whakakatakata o te tangata tukino i a koe. He whakakino, he whakatoi ā rātou 'katakata', ā, ka pā kino pea tā rātou whanonga ki a koe i te aroaro o te marea. Nā tēnei ka mataku koe ki te tūtaki ki ētahi atu, ā, ka meinga koe kia takahi i runga i ngā anga hua manu i a rātou. 

E mea ana a Nandita, "Ko tētahi atu mea hei mōhio māu, ahakoa e "katakata ana" tō hoa, kāore pea ia e tukino ā-hinengaro i a koe. Nō reira, he mea nui kia korero ki to hoa "Me pēhea ō kare ā-roto mō tēnei mea, ahakoa he kōrero kanohi ki te kanohi, he tuhinga kuputuhi, he reta rānei. Ko te tū atu ki a koe anō te taahiraa tuatahi ina pāngia koe e te tukino kare ā-roto." 

15. Ka meinga koe kia iti ake te mana

Ahakoa te nui o tāu mahi me tāu whakapau ki te whanaungatanga, ka meinga koe kia ruarua i tō uara tangata. Ahakoa he moni e pau ana mō ō hiahia, he tiaki hauora rānei mō tō hauora, ka kiia koe kāore e tika ana kia whiwhi i ngā mea taketake e hiahiatia ana. 

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16. Kei te whakawehihia koe 

I roto i tētahi whanaungatanga tukino kare ā-roto, tērā pea kāore tō āhua tinana e pāngia, engari ko tō hinengaro he raruraru. Ko ngā tūmomo tūkino me ngā kēmu hinengaro ka whakararu i tō hauora. Ka taea e tēnei te arahi mārire ki ngā mahi moepuku kāore e hiahiatia me te tukino ā-ira tangata.

17. Kei te ngoikore koe

Mā te pupuri i ō moni me te whakahaere i ngā take moni, ka uru te kaipahua ki tētahi momo tukino ā-ōhanga. Ko tō hoa rangatira te kaihanga i ngā whakataunga katoa o te whanaungatanga, ka waiho koe kia noho ngoikore, kia kore hoki e whai mana i te taha pūtea me te taha kare ā-roto.  

18. Kei te puta he raruraru i waenganui i a koe me ō whanaunga nā te tukino

I roto i tētahi whanaungatanga tukino ā-hinengaro, ka whakaari tō hoa i a ia anō he tangata pai ake. Ka hangaia e rātou he raruraru (he whakaaro noa iho, he whakaaro kē rānei) i waenganui i a koe me ō hoa aroha, ka hohonu ake ō kare ā-roto o te mokemoke me te kore āwhina. Ka mutu tō rongo i te arohaina.

He aha te take e noho tonu ai tetahi i roto i te whanaungatanga nanakia?

Koinei te pātai tuatahi e pātaihia ana e te nuinga o te tangata. E kī ana a Nandita, "Ko tētahi momo whanaungatanga ka tīmata i ngā kare ā-roto o te tumanako, te aroha, me te manaaki ki tō hoa. I te whanaketanga o te whanaungatanga, ngā tohu o te tukino kare ā-roto tērā pea ka puta ake. I te nuinga o te wā, he huringa noa te tukino kare ā-roto. Whai muri i te wā o te noho noa, ka puta anō he tukino. 

"Ina he wheako hurihuri, ka pāngia te tangata e ngā kare ā-roto o te pōhēhē, te tumanako, te pouri, te riri, me te pouri. Ko te mea e noho tonu ai te tangata ko te kare ā-roto o te tumanako. Ina rongo koe i taua hihi o te tumanako, ka hiahia koe ki te noho tonu i roto i te whanaungatanga, me te whakaaro ka pai ake ngā mea. Ko tētahi atu take e noho tonu ai te tangata ko te gaslighting, e ai ki te kōrero i mua ake nei."

Ko ētahi atu āhuatanga e pupuri ana i te tangata i roto i tētahi whanaungatanga tukino ko:

Te pānui e pā ana: Me pēhea te whakamutu i te āhua takoto kau, me te whakakī i te koretake

• E whakapono ana te patunga kei roto rātou i te aroha, ā, e tino aroha ana te kaipahua ki a rātou
• Kāore pea rātou e kite i ngā whanonga tukino ā-hinengaro 
• Mā te iti o te whakaaro ki a ia anō me te kore whakaaro ki a ia anō ka mau tonu te huringa tukino. 
• E whakapono ana rātou e mārama ana rātou ki tā rātou hoa, ā, e kite ana hoki i tōna taha pai 
• E mataku rawa ana rātou ki te wehe atu nā te whakawhirinaki ki te taha pūtea, nā te tūkino rānei
• Tērā pea ka mataku rātou mō te haumaru o ō rātou whānau
• I te haere o te wā, ka piki ake tō rātou kaha ki te manawanui ki te tukino

Me pēhea te whakatau i te tukino ā-hinengaro?

If kei roto koe i tētahi whanaungatanga tukino ā-hinengaro (kāore rānei kua tohua e koe he maha ngā whakautu pai ki te rārangi arowhai mō te tūkino kare ā-roto kua whakahuatia ake nei), anei ētahi o ngā mahi ka taea e koe te mahi hei whakatau i te tūkino, hei wehe atu rānei i te whanaungatanga:

1. Whakaaetia te meka he tukino tēnei

Ko te taahiraa tuatahi ki te whakatau i tētahi whanaungatanga tukino hinengaro ko te whakaae kei te tukinotia koe. Mā te whakakore i tō tukino ka arahi pea ki te haere tonu o tēnei huringa kino. Kia mōhiotia te tukino mō tōna āhua, ka taea e koe te tīmata anō ki te whakaora i tō oranga.  

2. Tuhia koe ki te tuatahi 

He tino uaua pea, engari me whakanoho e koe ō hiahia ki runga ake i ō te kaitūkino. Kia mutu tō whakaaro he koretake koe, ka taea e te manaaki i a koe anō te tīmata, ā, ka taea e koe te kaha ake ki te whawhai i te pakanga roa, mamae kei mua. Kimihia ētahi atu ngā huarahi hei aroha ki a koe anō, kai pai, moe, kōrero ki te tangata, me te tiki i ngā āwhina katoa e hiahiatia ana e koe hei whakapakari i tōu kaha. 

3. Tangohia te whakapae i a koe anō 

Mena kua roa koe e noho ana i roto i tētahi whanaungatanga tukino kare ā-roto, he tino uaua pea te whakapono kāore he mea he i roto i a koe. Engari kia māia, ehara KOE i te raruraru i konei. Whakamutua te whanonga o te whakapae i a koe anō mō ​​ngā whanonga tukino a tētahi atu, ā, tīmata ki te hanga i ngā huringa e āhei ai koe ki te wehe atu i taua wā tonu. 

4. Tuhia ō rohe 

Ko te mea nui i konei ko te whakatau ko ēhea ngā rohe e tika ana mō te hononga hauora ā, kia oti i a koe. Hei tauira, ki te whakatau koe ki te karo i ngā tautohetohe ki tō kaitūkino nā te mea e mōhio ana koe ka huri rātou hei tawai me te whakakino, oati ki a koe anō ka mawehe atu koe i tētahi āhuatanga ka whakapataritari pea. Mā tēnei ka whakaū i tō kaitūkino kāore e whakaaetia ana tā rātou whanonga. 

5. Whakaaetia kāore e taea e koe te whakatika i te tangata 

E mea ana a Nandita, "Ko te tērā pea ka ara ake te hononga mamae i te wā e tukinotia ana te wāhi e piri ai te hunga i roto i tētahi whanaungatanga nā roto i ngā wā o te whara. Nā te iti o te whakaaro ki a ia anō me te iti o te whakapono ki a ia anō, ka uaua haere te wawahi i tēnei hononga e te tangata i pāngia.”

Engari ehara i te kawenga māu te whakarerekē, te 'whakaora' rānei i tētahi tangata. Ko ia tangata te kawenga mō ōna ake whakaaro me āna mahi. Ka whakatau noa te hoa tukino ki te whai i aua whanonga kino, tukino. Kāore e taea te 'arohaina anō ki te noho noa.'

6. Tangohia koe i te āhuatanga 

Ina tīmata he wā whakatoi, me wehe atu koe i taua wāhi i te wā wawe tonu. Ki te tīmata he tautohe, haere atu i te rūma me te kore e whakapāha, e whakamārama rānei i tō tirohanga. Ki te tawai tō hoa ki a koe, ki te kōrero kino rānei i a koe i te aroaro o te marea, kaua e kōrero ki a ia. Kia mahara, ahakoa āu kōrero, āu mahi rānei, ka piki haere te āhuatanga. Nō reira, he haumaru ake te kore kōrero. 

Te pānui e pā ana: 12 Ngā Mea Kaua rawa e Whakarerekētia i roto i te Hononga

Ka tāpiri atu a Nandita, "Mēnā kua whakatau koe ki te noho tonu mō tētahi take, tiakina koe. Anei te huarahi: he mea nui te kohikohi i ō whakaaro me te whakahaere i ō kare ā-roto i te wā o te tukino. Mēnā kei te karanga ingoa kino tō hoa, kei te tawai ki a koe, kei te tautohetohe rānei ki a koe, kaua e tauhohe. Ina whakaitihia e te kaipahua tō whakapono ki a koe, ka whāngaihia e rātou ō tauhohe. Ko te mea pai ko te noho puku ahakoa ka mamae pea tō kare ā-roto. Ko te kore e whakaatu i tētahi urupare tētahi o ngā huarahi pai ake hei whakahaere i te tukino i te wā tonu." 

7. Karapotia koe ki te tautoko 

Hangaia tō ake whatunga tautoko. Koinei anake te huarahi hei wikitoria, hei puta atu rānei i tētahi whanaungatanga tukino. Me 'āwhina' koe, nō reira me tango. Kōrerohia ō āhuatanga me tētahi hoa, whānau rānei, me tētahi kaiwhakatakoto whakaaro rānei. Whakapaua he wā ki te hunga e arohaina ana e koe hei whakaiti i te pānga o te tukino. Ka āwhina hoki tēnei i a koe kia iti ake te noho mokemoke me te pouri, ā, ka āwhina pea i a koe ki te whakaaro ki ngā mea i roto i te tirohanga whānui. 

8. Whakamaherehia tō mawhiti 

Ka taea e koe te waea atu ki te raina awhina mō te tūkino ā-whare ā-motu, ki ngā NGO rānei, ki te tiki āwhina ngaio rānei mō ngā tohutohu mō te whakatau i te tukino hinengaro hei mawhiti atu rānei i tētahi āhuatanga kino rawa atu o te tukino. Ā tōna wā, ka pā kino te tukino ki tō hauora hinengaro, ā, ka huri pea te āhuatanga hei tutu tinana. Hei tiaki i a koe me tō whānau, whakaritea he ara mawhiti hei matara atu i te kaitukino i a koe, hei whakarite hoki i a koe kia noho ko koe anō. 

Ngā mea kāore e tika kia whakamātauria e koe me te tangata tukino i te kare ā-roto 

Me tūpato koe ina mahi tahi koe me tētahi kaitukino. Tērā pea ka kino ake te āhuatanga mēnā kāore i te pai te whakahaere, ā, ka hua ake he mahi tukino, tae atu ki te tutu. Ko ētahi mahi hei karo ina mahi tahi koe me tētahi kaitukino kare ā-roto ko:

• Te tautohetohe ki tō hoaKāore he take o te tautohetohe ki tētahi hoa e kore e whakarongo ki a koe. Ka kitea tonutia e rātou ētahi atu huarahi hei whakatoi, hei whakama hoki i a koe. te kōrero i ngā mea mamae

• Te rapu whakamārama mō ā rātou whanonga whakatoiI tētahi atu taha, ko tētahi atu patu e whakamahia ana e ngā pāngia ko te muru i te hara o te kaitukino. Mā te whakamārama he aha rātou i whanonga ai i tētahi ara, me te whakaiti i ngā hua o ā rātou mahi, ka nui ake te kino i te pai. 

• Te tono atu ki te taha "pai" o te kaitūkinoMā te whakapāha me te whakamarie i tō hoa ka nui ake te tukino ā muri ake nei. I te mea ka nui haere ngā rohe e whitihia ana, ka uru ngā taha e rua ki tētahi huringa mamae me te whiu e kore e taea te puta atu. 

Te pānui e pā ana: Te Whakahaere i ngā Kare ā-roto i roto i ngā Hononga - 13 Ngā Tohu me ngā Mea e 5 Ka taea e koe te Mahi

Me pēhea te whakaora i te tukino ā-hinengaro 

Haunga ngā mahi kua whakahuatia hei whakatau i tētahi whanaungatanga tukino, he mea nui anō hoki te whakaora i a ia anō. E ai ki tētahi ako e te Whare Hauora o Te Whare Wānanga o Texas, ko te tukinotanga kare ā-roto he "haerenga ora, e kapi ana i ngā mutunga maha, ngā tohu tuarua o te hauora tinana me te hinengaro, me ngā take kounga o te ora i toro atu ki tua atu i te wheako tukino tonu." Nō reira, ko te whakaoranga mai i te tukino kare ā-roto ka roa pea te oranga. 

Mena kei te pāngia koe e tētahi whanaungatanga tukino kare ā-roto, anei ētahi mahi ka taea e koe te mahi hei whakangāwari ake i te haerenga ki te whakaoranga:

• Whakaaetia kei te tukinotia/i tukinotia koe: Mā te whakaiti i te kino i pā ki a koe ka ārai i te whakaoranga, nō reira me whakaae koe kua pāngia koe e te tukino.
• Whakapūmau ki tō whakaoranga: Whakapuakina he kupu whakaari mō te ka mutu te huringa o te tukino i a koeHe tūturu te mamae o te whakatupuranga, e te iwi, ā, kāore koutou e hiahia kia mau tonu tēnei tukino hinengaro me ōna pānga ki ā koutou tamariki.
• Kia atawhai: Whakamahia te atawhai ki a koe anō i rite ki tāu i hoatu ki te tangata nanakia. Kia mārama ki te taumaha o tō āhuatanga, kia manawanui hoki i a koe e ora ana, e ora ana hoki.
• Hangaia he punaha tautoko: Kōwhiria he tautoko ngaio mēnā kāore e taea e koe te whakawhirinaki ki ō hoa me tō whānau. Kei te wātea ngā waea āwhina me ngā rōpū tautoko hei whakarato i tētahi hapori māu i a koe e wikitoria ana i te pānga o te tukino. 
• Awhina i etahi atu: Mā te kōrero ki ētahi atu i pāngia me te whakawhitiwhiti kōrero ka āwhina i a rātou ki te amo i ngā taumahatanga o tētahi ki tētahi. Mā tēnei ka whakaratohia hoki he rautaki whakaora me ngā taputapu whakaora. 

E mea ana a Nandita, "He mea pai kia whai pūnaha tautoko koe – he hunga e aroha ana, e mārama ana ki a koe – hei āwhina i a koe ki te whakaoti i ēnei pakanga ā-roto. Mā te kōrero ki ngā tohunga ka taea te āwhina i a koe me tō whānau ki te wehe atu i ngā āhuatanga morearea. Kia maumahara, kei te wātea tonu te āwhina – me pātai noa koe ki ngā tāngata tika." Kia mōhio ai koe, ko ngā kaiwhakatakoto whakaaro mohio me ngā kaiwhakatakoto whakaaro raihana kei runga i Te rōpū a Bonobology kei konei tonu mo koe.

Tērā te pakanga, ā, ka puta te tukino kare ā-roto. He maha tonu ngā pakanga i roto i tētahi whanaungatanga hauora, ā, ko te mutunga iho, kei tētahi, kei tētahi rānei o ngā hoa e rua, te whakatau i tētahi whakaaetanga e whakaaetia ana e te katoa. Mā te whakapuaki i ō kare ā-roto me te whakaoti rapanga i ia wā, ka taea hoki te whakapakari i tō whanaungatanga mēnā ka puta he pakanga. 

Ko te tukino kare ā-roto ia, he kino, ā, ka pā mai he raruraru nui ki te hauora hinengaro. Ka taea e te tangata i roto i tētahi whanaungatanga hauora kore pēnei te pōuri, te mārama kore, te riri, te whakama, me te mataku. Mena ka whakapouri tonu tō hoa aroha i a koe mōu ake me ō āhuatanga, kua tae ki te wā kia mōhio koe kāore ngā mea katoa e tika ana i roto i te hononga. Rapua he tautoko hei wehe atu i a koe, hei tīmata anō i tō oranga. Ka taea, ā, ka taea te mahi, engari kia mōhio ko wai hei tono āwhina, ā, kāore koe i te mokemoke. 

Me pēhea te ngaro o ngā kare ā-roto mō te tangata e arohaina ana e koe, me te tuku atu

Me pēhea te whakatau i tētahi e whakapae ana i a koe mō ngā mea katoa — 21 Ngā Huarahi Whaitake

He aha te tūkino i roto i te whanaungatanga?

Kāore tō koha e kiia he kaupapa aroha takohaMā tēnei ka taea e Bonobology te kawe mai i ngā mōhiotanga hou me ngā mōhiotanga hou ki a koe i roto i tā mātou whainga ki te āwhina i te tangata katoa o te ao ki te ako me pēhea te mahi i tetahi mea.