Uyadumala Lapho Umuntu Omthandayo Ekulimaza? Umhlahlandlela Wokubhekana Nezinkinga Nokuphulukisa

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Wake wazizwa udumele lapho othile omthandayo ekuzwisa ubuhlungu? Mhlawumbe umlingani wakho, ilungu lomndeni, noma umngane oseduze ukudumaza ngokungalindelekile. Lowo muzwa wobuhlungu othandweni ungaqeda ubuhlungu obukhulu, ubangele ukudabuka kwenhliziyo nokudabuka. Ebudlelwaneni, ubuhlungu buvame ukuvela ekuphukeni kwamathemba noma ukunganakwa ngokomzwelo, futhi kungakushiya uzizwa udidekile futhi ukhashelwe.

Kungokwemvelo ukuzizwa udabukile, uthukuthele, noma ngisho namahloni lapho othile omethembayo ekuzwisa ubuhlungu. Ungase uphinde ucabange ngalesi sikhathi noma uzisole. Kulo mhlahlandlela, sizochaza ukuthi kungani lokhu kubuhlungu kangaka nokuthi yini okufanele uyenze ngakho. Uzothola uzwela, izinyathelo ezisebenzayo, kanye namasu okubhekana nesimo ukuze kukusize ululame futhi wakhe kabusha ukuqina kwakho ngokomzwelo.

Kungani Kubuhlungu: Izimpande Zengqondo Nezemizwa

Uma umuntu othembele kuye ekudumaza noma ekuzwisa ubuhlungu, kungabangela amanxeba ajulile okunamathelana. Ngokwengqondo, abantu bakha izibopho futhi bathembele kubathandekayo babo ukuze bahlangabezane nezidingo zethu. Lapho ukwethembana kunqamuka, kudala uhlobo lobuhlungu bokukhashelwa. Ngamanye amazwi, uma umuntu esithembele kuye egcina esilimaza, kushukumisa umuzwa wethu wokuphepha.

Okulindelwe othandweni kudlala indima enkulu:

Silindele uzwela, ukwesekwa, kanye nokwethenjelwa okuvela kwabathandekayo
Uma umlingani wakho noma ilungu lomndeni wakho lihluleka ukuhlangabezana nalokho okulindelwe, kuvame ukuzwakala sengathi uhlulekile noma wenqatshwa.
Lokhu okulindelwe okungaphumeleli kungakushiya uzizwa uzizwa ubuhlungu futhi wakhashelwa
Ubuhlungu buvame ukubonakala njengengxube yokudabuka, intukuthelo, ukudideka, kanye nomuzwa wecala

Ithiyori yokunamathela ichaza ukuthi kungani lobu buhlungu bungaba bukhulu kangaka. Kusukela ebuntwaneni, sifunda ukwethemba abantu abathile ngemizwa yethu. Lapho othile ephula lokho kuthembana, kungazwakala sengathi inxeba lobuntwana liyavuleka. Ngisho nokuncane okungatheni kungalimaza ngoba kuthinta ukudabuka kwenhliziyo nokudabuka okuboshwe ezibophweni ezijulile.

Amaphethini nezimpawu ezivamile

Ukwazi ukuthi lokhu kubuhlungu kuvame ukuba nomthelela kanjani kungakusiza ukuthi ubone ukuthi kwenzekani. Izindlela ezivamile zokuziphatha okulimazayo zifaka:

Ukuzikhukhumeza noma ukuthula: Ngokungazelelwe bayayeka ukuphendula noma ukuhoxa, okwenza uzizwe ulahliwe
Ukuziphatha okungahambisani: Ngolunye usuku bazoba nothando, ngosuku olulandelayo bakude noma bagxeke. Le rollercoaster ingadala ukukhathazeka nokudideka
Izithembiso eziphuliwe: Bayahluleka ukufeza izibopho zabo. Isibonelo, lapho bevame ukukhohlwa izinsuku ezibalulekile noma ukukhansela izinhlelo, isithembiso ngasinye esikhohliwe sizwakala sengathi senqatshiwe.
Ukungazweli noma ukugxekwa: Basho izinto ezibuhlungu ngentukuthelo noma bahluleke ukucabangela imizwa yakho, okubangela amanxeba angokomzwelo

Ukuphendula lokhu kulimala, ungase uzizwe:

I-Rumination: Ukuhlala uphinda isigameko esibuhlungu noma ukucabanga kakhulu ngalokho obekungashiwo
Ukuzigxeka: Ngizibuza ukuthi ngabe ngandlela thile ubangele ukuziphatha kwabo noma kufanele yini ukulinyazwa
I-Mood iyashintsha: Ungase ujikeleze phakathi kokukhala nokuzizwa uthukuthele noma ungenamizwa. Ngomzuzu owodwa ucasukile, olandelayo uzizwa uthukuthele
Ukungathembi: Ngemva kokulimala, ungase uzibuze isinqumo sakho futhi uqaphele kakhulu izimpawu zokuthi ukukhaphela ebudlelwaneni

Uma ubuhlungu buphinde buvela, ubuhlungu buyanda ngokuhamba kwesikhathi. Amaphutha enzeke kanye kuphela ayenzeka kuwo wonke umuntu, kodwa indlela yokudumala ingabonisa umjikelezo ongemuhle. Kubalulekile ukuqaphela uma ubhajwe ogibeni lokuzizwa udumele kaningi ngumuntu ofanayo, njengoba lokho kuvame ukudinga ukubeka imingcele eqinile noma ukuthola usizo.

Ubuhlungu othandweni — Ukukhala kuyindlela evamile yokusabela ekukhashelweni

Kungani Umuntu Omthandayo Ekulimaza

Nakuba kungathetheleli ukuziphatha kwabo, ukuqonda ukuthi kungani umuntu omthandayo engase akuphathe kabi kungasiza ekunciphiseni ubuhlungu. Izici ezivamile zifaka:

Ukulimala okungahlosiwe: Ngokuvamile, abantu abazimisele ukukulimaza. Bangase baphazamiseke, bacindezeleke, noma bamane bangazi ngezidingo zakho. Isibonelo, bangase basho okuthile ngokungacabangi ngaphandle kokubona umthelela.
Ukungaxhumani kahle: Ukungaqondani okuncane kungakhula ngokushesha. Mhlawumbe ubudinga ukwesekwa kodwa awuzange ucele ngokusobala, futhi bathatha ukuthula kwakho ngendlela engafanele. Ukubamba imizwa kungaholela ekuthukutheleni nhlangothi zombili
Ukunganakwa ngokomzwelo noma izidingo ezingahlangatshezwanga: Uma izidingo zomuntu oyedwa zingahlangatshezwa, angase athukuthele noma ahoxe. Ngezinye izikhathi abantu abanjalo ukungazinzi ngokomzwelo noma ukubhekana nobuhlungu babo bagcina belimaza abantu abaseduze nabo bengahlosile
Izindlela zokuzivikela: Ukuze azivikele, othile angase asebenzise ukusola noma ukubikezela, acindezele ukungaqiniseki kwakhe kuwe. Isibonelo, angase athi “Yiphutha lakho” lapho, ekujuleni kwenhliziyo, ezizwa enecala noma esaba

Ngokombono wabo, bangase bazizwe benecala elikhulu: kuvamile ukuthi abantu bacabange ukuthi, “Ngilimaza umuntu engimthanda kakhulu.” Lokhu kuqaphela, noma kungakhulunywa, kuyisinyathelo sokuqala sokuzwelana nawe. Kubonisa ukuthi bayawuqaphela umonakalo owenziwe, okungenani kancane. Kodwa ngezinye izikhathi umuntu angase angabunaki ubuhlungu bakho, ebambeke ezinkingeni zakhe.

Kukuthinta Kanjani?

Ukulinyazwa ngumuntu omkhathalelayo kungaba nemiphumela emibi kakhulu:

1. Umthelela ongokomzwelo

Ngokushesha, ungase uzizwe udabukile, uhlazekile, noma uthukuthele. Ukuzethemba kwakho kungathinteka, ungase uzibuze ukuthi kungani lokhu kwenzeke kuwe. Ekugcineni:

Ubuhlungu obungaxazululiwe bungabangela izindaba zokuthembela
Ungase uqale ukulindela ukudumazeka kwesikhathi esizayo
Ungase uqaphe noma ungabathembi abanye abantu ngezinhloso zabo
Imizwa yokukhashelwa ingabangela “isilonda sengqondo” esihlala isikhathi eside, esifana nosizi noma ukukhathazeka okukhulu

Ukufunda Okuhlobene: Ingabe Unamahloni Noma Akanaso Isithakazelo? 26 Izindlela Zokutshela Umehluko

2. Umthelela wokuziphatha

Ngemva nje kokulimala, ungase:

Susa kumuntu noma umnike ukwelashwa buthule
Yiba nokuzivikela noma ukucasuka ngendlela engavamile
Ziphonse emsebenzini noma ezintweni zokuzilibazisa ukuze uphazamise ubuhlungu
Ezimweni ezimbi kakhulu, ungase ube nemicabango yokuzilimaza noma yokucindezeleka; uma lokho kwenzeka, funa usizo ngokushesha
Ngokuhamba kwesikhathi, ukucindezeleka okungapheli okuvela kulolu hlobo lobuhlungu obungokomzwelo kungathinta impilo yakho engokomzimba

3. Umthelela wobudlelwano

Ukwethembana kuyinhlanganisela yobudlelwano. Uma kuphukile, ukuxhumana kuvame ukubhidlika.

Ungase uphinde uthukuthele futhi uthole kunzima ukuba sengozini futhi
Uma ubuhlungu bungaxazululwa, ungase ugcine umnqamule umuntu
Emindenini, lokhu kungaholela ekuhlukaneni
In ubudlelwane bezothando, kungasho ukulwa njalo noma ngisho nokuhlukana

Izazi zokusebenza kwengqondo ziphawula ukuthi ukwethembana kuqinisa ubudlelwano futhi kugxilisa ikhono lokuhamba ngokuzethemba emhlabeni. Lapho lokho kwethembana kushabalala, umuzwa wakho wokulondeka nokuzethemba ungaphazamiseka. Ukukubuyisela kudinga isikhathi nomzamo oqhubekayo; ngaphandle kwakho, ungahlala uqaphile ebuhlotsheni besikhathi esizayo.

Ukulimala Kokukhaphela — Ukukhaphela kungaholela ezimpini ezivamile esikhathini esizayo

Ongakwenza: Amasu Okwelapha Nezinyathelo

Nazi ezinye izinyathelo ezisebenzayo namasu okubhekana nesimo ukuze uqhubekele phambili ngemva kokulimala ngumuntu omthandayo:

1. Zivumele uzizwe

Imizwa yakho inengqondo. Kuvamile ukuthukuthela, ukudabuka, ukudumala, noma ngisho nokudideka. Ungayivaleli le mizwa. Uvunyelwe:

Thukuthela
Yiba lusizi
Zizwe udumele
Khala uma udinga
Memeza emcamelweni ngasese
Noma vele ukhiphe i-diary

"Bengihlala ngizizwa sengathi ngiphambene ngokuzizwa ngithukuthele impilo yami yonke, futhi bengihlala ngizibeka engcupheni ngezinto ezingezimbi kangako. Ngicabanga ukuthi ukuzivumela ukuba ngithukuthele kuyisinyathelo esinempilo sokululama, okungenani"
Umsebenzisi we-Reddit

2. Zijayeze

Ukuzinakekela kubalulekile. Yenza izinto ezizokunakekela ngokomzimba nangokwengqondo.

Ukuzivocavoca
Thola umoya omusha
Yidla ukudla okunomsoco
Bhala kahle
Yenza izinto ozithandayo noma imisebenzi ekwenza uzizwe kahle
Zinike ukudla okuncane njengokugeza okufudumele, i-movie oyithandayo, ukuhambahamba epaki

Ochwepheshe baphawula ukuthi kuhle ukuzinakekela kubuyisela ukuzethemba, ukuzethemba, kanye nokuqina.

3. Thola ukwesekwa

Ukuzihlukanisa kungenza ubuhlungu bube bubi nakakhulu. Ukukhuluma ngakho kungenza ubuhlungu buzwakale bungalawuleki kalula.

Yabelana ngemizwa yakho nabangani othembekile noma amalungu omndeni akhathalela ngempela. Ukuba phakathi kwabantu abanozwela kukukhumbuza ukuthi akuwona wonke umuntu ozokulimaza
Uma uzizwa ungaphephile ukwabelana nomuntu omaziyo, cabanga ngamaqembu okusekelana noma izinkundla eziku-inthanethi ezifana r/ubudlelwano
Ukuzwa okuhlangenwe nakho kwabanye kungakusiza futhi uzizwe uqondwa

Ukufunda Okuhlobene: 19+ Izinhlelo zokusebenza zokukopela ezivame ukusetshenziswa kakhulu ze-iPhone

4. Ziveze ngobuhlakani

Ukubhala phansi noma ezinye izindlela zokuveza imizwa kungaba yindlela yokwelapha. Bhala ngokwenzekile nokuthi uzizwa kanjani. Ucwaningo kukhombisa ukuthi ukubhala ngokuhlukumezeka nemizwa kungasiza ekuhleleni imicabango nokunciphisa ukucindezeleka.

Ungabhala incwadi engathunyelwanga kumuntu okuphathe kabi, ukuze uveze yonke imizwa yakho ngokuphephile.
Ukubhala izinkondlo noma izingoma kungenye indlela enhle
Uma amagama engeyona inhloso yakho, ukudweba kungaba yindlela enhle yokuveza

Ukuxhumana Okuvulekile — Veza imizwa yakho

5. Beka imingcele ecacile

Nquma ukuthi yikuphi ukuziphatha ozokwamukela nokungakwamukeli kusukela esikhathini esizayo. Unelungelo lokuzivikela. Isibonelo, ungase:

Tshela lowo muntu ukuthi, “Kuyangizwisa ubuhlungu uma uthi X; ngidinga ukuthi uyeke”
Thatha isikhathi uphumule
Setha umngcele sengathi akusekho zingxabano ebusuku kakhulu
Hamba uqine ungaxhumani isikhathi eside

Khumbula, ukubeka imingcele kumayelana nokuvikela inhlalakahle yakho, hhayi ukujezisa omunye umuntu. Kulungile ukubeka impilo yakho engokomzwelo kuqala.

Ukufunda Okuhlobene: Ukusondelana Kuqhathaniswa Nocansi: Ukuthi Zihluke Kanjani & Kungani Kokubili Kubalulekile

6. Khulumisanani ngendlela eyakhayo

Uma ubuhlobo bubalulekile kuwe futhi buzizwa buphephile, zama ukukhuluma nomuntu okuphathe kabi ngendlela ozizwa ngayo.

Sebenzisa izinkulumo ezizolile ezithi “Mina”, isibonelo, “Ngazizwa ngiphatheke kabi lapho wena…”
Chaza ngokuqondile ukuthi yini ekucasulile nokuthi kungani. Lokhu akukhona ukusola, kodwa ukubasiza baqonde umthelela wezenzo zabo
Khumbula ukuthi umgomo uwukucaca kanye nesisombululo, hhayi nje impikiswano entsha

Ngezinye izikhathi abantu abaqapheli ngempela ukuthi basizwisa ubuhlungu size sibatshele. Uma belalela futhi bezwelana nathi, lokho kungaqala akhe kabusha ukwethembanaKodwa khumbula, ungalawula ukuxhumana kwakho kuphela, hhayi impendulo yabo.

7. Zijwayeze ububele

Lokhu kungase kuzwakale kumangalisa, kodwa ukuzama ukubona izinto ngombono womunye umuntu kungakusiza ukuthi welapheke.

Ububele abuthetheleli isenzo esibuhlungu, kodwa bunganciphisa ulaka. Isibonelo, mhlawumbe basho into embi lapho becindezelekile.
Qaphela ukuthi wonke umuntu unephutha, kuhlanganise nawe
Futhi, yiba mnene kuwe: zikhumbuze ukuthi ukuzwa ubuhlungu akukwenzi ube buthakathaka. Ufanelwe umusa, futhi lokho kuhlanganisa nokuzizwela njengoba ululama.

Indlela yokuphulukisa uma umuntu omthandayo ekuzwisa ubuhlungu

8. Sebenza ekuthetheleleni

Ukuthethelela kuvame ukungaqondwa kahle. Akusho ukuvumela ubuhlungu noma ukwenza sengathi akwenzekanga. Kunalokho, ukuthethelela kuyindlela yokuzikhethela yokukhulula intukuthelo ngenxa yakho.

“[Ukuthethelela] kubukeka sengathi ukuziphatha okubi emehlweni, kuyasho, kuyazivumela ukuthi zikuzwe, kodwa kudlulela phambili ngokuphelele kukho” – uFred Luskin, umqondisi weStanford University Forgiveness Project

Empeleni, lokhu kusho ukuvuma ubuhlungu bese unquma ukwenza kanjalo kuyeke kuhambe ngakho-ke akuhlali kukubangela ubuthi. Uma uzithola uzibuza ukuthi “ungathethelela kanjani ebudlelwaneni” noma “ungamthethelela kanjani umlingani wakho,”:

Qala ngokuhlonza ngqo ukuthi yini edinga ukwelashwa
Bese, yenza isinqumo esiqondile sokuyeka intukuthelo
Lokhu akusho ukuthi uthethelela okwenzekile. Ukuthethelela kukukhulula ekuthwaleni umthwalo wobuhlungwini

Abantu abathethelelayo bavame ukuba nempilo engcono yengqondo kanye nobudlelwano obujabulisayo nakakhulu. Kodwa khumbula, kuyinqubo: ungase uthethelele kancane kancane, futhi lokho kulungile.

Ukufunda Okuhlobene: 10 Essential Online Ukuqomisana Amathiphu Kwabesifazane

9. Funa usizo lochwepheshe uma kudingeka

Uma ubuhlungu buzwakala bukhulu kakhulu ukuba bungaphathwa wedwa, ukukhuluma nomeluleki noma uchwepheshe wezokwelapha kungasiza. Uchwepheshe unikeza indawo ephephile nengathathi hlangothi ku:

I-Vent
Funda amasu okubhekana nesimo
Futhi qonda ukuthi kwenzekeni

Ukwelashwa kombhangqwana noma ukwelashwa komndeni kungasiza uma bobabili abantu befuna ukulungisa izinto ndawonye. Ochwepheshe bacebisa ukuthi uthintane nodokotela uma ubuhlungu bakho buphenduka ukucindezeleka okuqhubekayo, ukukhathazeka, noma unemicabango yokuzilimaza.

Udinga nini usizo lochwepheshe

Ngezinye izikhathi ukuzisiza akwanele, ikakhulukazi uma ubuhlungu bujulile. Kufanele ucabangele ukwelashwa noma ukwelulekwa uma:

Ubuhlungu obukhulu buhlala isikhathi eside: Uma uzizwa ubhajwe ekulimaleni okukhulu noma osizini olungathuthuki ngemva kwamasonto ambalwa, usizo lochwepheshe lungakuqondisa
Kuvela imicabango elimazayo: Uma unemicabango yokuzilimaza, ukuzibulala, noma uzizwa ungenathemba nhlobo, thola usizo ngokushesha ngokuxhumana nochwepheshe wezempilo yengqondo noma i-hotline
Impilo yansuku zonke iyaphazamiseka: Uma ubuhlungu bakho buphazamisa umsebenzi, isikole, noma ukuzinakekela okuyisisekelo njengokulala, ukudla, noma ukugxila, ukwelashwa kungakusiza
Izinkinga eziyinkimbinkimbi ziyabandakanyeka: Uma isimo sithinta ukuhlukumezeka okukhulu, ukuhlukunyezwa, noma izinkinga zempilo yengqondo njengokulutha, kuwukuhlakanipha ukuba nesiqondiso sochwepheshe
Udinga usizo lokulamula: Ngezinye izikhathi ukuba nomuntu ongathathi hlangothi okhuluma nomunye umuntu kuyasiza. Ukwelashwa kwemibhangqwana noma komndeni kungathuthukisa ubudlelwano obungebuhle. I-Cleveland Clinic iphawula ukuthi ukwelashwa komndeni kuklanyelwe ngqo ukuthuthukisa "ubudlelwano phakathi kwamalungu omndeni, ukucindezeleka, intukuthelo, kanye nokulimala ngokomzwelo"

Ukucela usizo kuwuphawu lwesibindi nokuzihlonipha, hhayi ubuthakathaka. Akudingeki ululame wedwa.

Uma umuntu omthandayo ekuzwisa ubuhlungu, yini ekusiza kakhulu ukubhekana nesimo?

Ukuthatha isikhala nokugxila ekuzinakekeleni

Ukuxoxa nomuntu noma umngane omethembayo ngakho

Ukukhetha ukuthethelela nokudedela

10. Nquma izinyathelo ezilandelayo

Ekugcineni, kufanele ucabangele ukuthi umuntu okuphathe kabi uzimisele yini ukushintsha. Ingabe uyazisola ngempela futhi wenza umzamo?

Uma ukholelwa ukuthi bangashintsha futhi ufuna ukuqhubeka, vumelana ngezinyathelo ezincane ndawonye, njengezingxoxo eziqotho noma ukwelashwa, bese nizakha kabusha kancane kancane.
Gubha izinto ezincane ezinhle. Isibonelo, uma bekhumbula usuku olubalulekile kuwe noma bexolise ngobuqotho, qaphela lokho
Kodwa uma ukuziphatha okulimazayo kuqhubeka noma bengakhombisi ukuziphendulela, kungaba ngcono ukuqhubeka. Ukuhamba kubuhlungu, kodwa ukuhlala enkambisweni yobuhlungu kungabangela umonakalo wesikhathi eside.

Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi uhlala noma uhamba, gxila ekwakheni kabusha ukwethembana ebudlelwaneni noma ekufuneni ukuvala ubuhlobo. Uma uhlala, thatha kancane: vuselela ukwethembana isinyathelo esisodwa ngesikhathi. Uma uhamba, zivumele ukukhala ngokulahlekelwa.

"Yiba nesibindi esanele sokuthemba uthando kanye futhi njalo kanye futhi"
- Maya Angelou

Izinganekwane Nemibono Engalungile

Kulula ukuwela ezinkolelweni ezingamanga uma ulimele. Nazi ezinye zezizathu ezingalungile okufanele uziqaphele:

“Ukube bengibathanda ngokwanele, bebengeke bangiphathe kabi”: Lokhu kungamanga. Ngisho nabantu abanomusa kakhulu nabanothando kakhulu bayawenza amaphutha noma babe nezinsuku ezimbi. Wonke umuntu “uyaphambuka, unephutha” njengoba uDkt. Fred Luskin, umqondisi weStanford University Forgiveness Project, esikhumbuza. Uthando olujulile aluvikeli ubuhlungu
“Uma ngibathethelela, kufanele ngihlale ebudlelwaneni”: Lutho neze. Ukuthethelela kungokwakho, akusona isiqinisekiso sokubuyisana. Ungathethelela umuntu ngaphakathi ngaphandle kokubuyela esimweni esifanayo sobudlelwano.
"Zizoshintsha ngolunye usuku uma ngilinda nje": Awukwazi ukuphoqa ukukhula komunye umuntu. Ukulinda unomphela kungandisa ubuhlungu bakho. Ukwethembana kwakhiwa kabusha ngezenzo eziqhubekayo ngokuhamba kwesikhathi, hhayi nje izithembiso. Uma izinyanga zidlula ngaphandle komzamo wangempela noma ukuqonda okuvela kuzo, kungaba ngcono ukuyeka ukulinda nokuvikela inhliziyo yakho
"Ukuthethelela kuyashesha noma kulula": Eqinisweni, ukuthethelela kuvame ukuba inqubo ehamba kancane. Kuvamile uma kuthatha amasonto noma izinyanga ukuzwa ukuthethelela kwangempela. Ungazicindezeli ukuthi “umane ukunqobe.” Ukuthethelela kusho ukukhetha ukudedela, kodwa lokho kukhetha kungenzeka ngezinyathelo ezincane. Thatha ngejubane lakho

Gwema lezi zinganekwane ngokugxila eqinisweni: imizwa yakho iyasebenza, intethelelo iwukuthula kwakho, futhi ufanelwe ubudlelwano lapho izidingo zakho zaneliswa khona.

Imibuzo Evame Ukubuzwa

1. Ingabe kujwayelekile ukuzizwa udumele othandweni?

Impela. Uma umuntu omkhathalelayo ekudumaza, ukuzizwa udabuke noma uthukuthele kuyimpendulo yemvelo. Kusho ukuthi ububazisa ubuhlobo. Izazi zengqondo ziphawula ukuthi ukudumala okunjalo kulindeleke: kungokwemvelo ukuzizwa udumele lapho umuntu omthandayo ekuzwisa ubuhlungu. Le mizwa iyingxenye yokuba ngumuntu. Ukuyibona kunempilo, njengoba kukhombisa ukuthi inhliziyo yakho itshaliwe.

2. Kuthatha isikhathi esingakanani ukuphulukiswa ngokomzwelo?

Ukuphulukiswa akunaso isikhathi esibekiwe. Abanye abantu baqala ukuzizwa bengcono ngemva kwamasonto ambalwa, kanti amanxeba ajulile angathatha izinyanga. Cishe uzoba nezinsuku ezinhle kanye nokwehluleka. Isihluthulelo intuthuko kancane kancane: isenzo ngasinye sokuzinakekela noma umzuzu wokuqonda kukusiza ukuthi ululame kakhudlwana. Uma ukudabuka okukhulu noma ukukhathazeka kuthatha izinsuku eziningi isikhathi esingaphezu kwamasonto amabili kuya kwamathathu, kuwukuhlakanipha ukuthola ukwesekwa. Khumbula, kulungile ukuphulukisa ngesivinini sakho.

3. Ingabe umuntu angakulimaza engazi?

Yebo, abantu ngezinye izikhathi basho noma benza izinto ezibuhlungu bengaziqondile. Wonke umuntu unamabala angawaboni, futhi ukucindezeleka noma izinkinga zomuntu siqu zingenza umuntu angazweli. Isibonelo, umlingani angase akugxeke lapho ezizwa ekhungathekile, engazi ukuthi kubuhlungu kangakanani. Yilapho ukuxhumana kungasiza khona. Khumbula futhi ukuthi abantu abaphelele: sonke “siyawenza amaphutha, sinephutha”. Ngisho noma babengahlosile ukukulimaza, imizwa yakho isengokoqobo futhi ifanelwe ukunakwa.

4. Ngimthethelela kanjani umuntu engimthandayo?

Qala ngokuvuma ubuhlungu bakho bese unquma ukuthi ufuna ukuyeka intukuthelo. Kungasiza ukukhuluma nomngane omethembayo noma umeluleki, mhlawumbe ubhale phansi okwenzekile. Khumbula, ukuthethelela umuntu omthandayo akuzithetheleli izenzo zakhe, kodwa kukukhulula ekuthwaleni igqubu. Yehlisa umoya; ngezinye izikhathi ukuthethelela kuza kancane kancane ngokuhamba kwesikhathi.

5. Ngingabhekana kanjani nakho lapho amalungu omndeni engilimaza?

Ubuhlungu obuvela emndenini bungaba buhlungu kakhulu ngoba ubulindele ukwesekwa yibo. Izinyathelo ziyafana: qaphela ukuthi ubuhlungu bakho buyasebenza, futhi uma kuphephile, cabanga ngokubhekana nakho. Ukwelashwa komndeni kungaba usizo kakhulu: ochwepheshe baphawula ukuthi kuklanyelwe ukuthuthukisa ubudlelwano bomndeni obunezinkinga nokwelapha amanxeba angokomzwelo. Futhi uma ilungu lomndeni likulimaza ngokuphindaphindiwe, kungadingeka ukuthi uthathe ibanga elikhudlwana, noma ngabe kunzima.

Izikhombi Ezibalulekile

Imizwa yakho inengqondo. Kuvamile ukuzizwa udumele lapho othile omthandayo ekuzwisa ubuhlungu
Nakekela umzimba nengqondo yakho: yidla kahle, ulale, uvivinye umzimba, futhi wenze imisebenzi oyithandayo. Xhumana nabangani noma umndeni othembekile ukuze uthole induduzo
Uma ukhetha ukuzibandakanya, khuluma ngokwethembeka usebenzisa izitatimende ezithi “Mina” ukuchaza ukuthi yini ekuzwisa ubuhlungu. Futhi nquma ukuthi yikuphi ukuziphatha ongeke usakwamukela
Ukuthethelela umuntu omthandayo akusho ukuthi uyayivumela ubuhlungu. Kusho ukuyeka intukuthelo ukuze uqhubeke nempilo yakho.
Uma ubuhlungu bakho bujulile noma buqhubeka, ungangabazi ukuthola usizo lochwepheshe. Imizwa yokudabuka okukhulu, ukukhathazeka, noma imicabango yokuzilimaza iyizimpawu zokuthi sekuyisikhathi sokukhuluma nodokotela noma umeluleki.

Imicabango Final

Ukudumala lapho othile omthandayo ekuzwisa ubuhlungu kungenye yezinto ezinzima kakhulu ebudlelwaneni. Ubuhlungu bothando bukukhumbuza ukuthi utshale malini kuleso sibopho, nokuthi ukwethembana kubaluleke kangakanani. Ukuphulukiswa akwenzeki ngobusuku obubodwa; kuyinqubo yokuzivumela ukuthi uzizwe, ubeke imingcele, uzijwayeze uzwela, futhi unqume ukuthi yini enempilo kuwe, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi lokho kusho ukwakha kabusha noma ukuqhubeka. Khumbula, ukubaluleka kwakho akunqunywa yizenzo zomunye umuntu. Ufanelwe uthando oluphakamisayo, hhayi uthando olulimazayo ngokuphindaphindiwe. Ngokuthatha izinyathelo ezincane zokucubungula imizwa yakho nokufuna ukwesekwa, ungaguqula ukudabuka kwenhliziyo kube ukuqina futhi uphume uqinile, uhlakaniphile, futhi ulungele ukwamukela ukuxhumana okunempilo esikhathini esizayo.

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