Kuyini Ukulondeka Ebudlelwaneni? Incazelo, Izimpawu, Nokuthi Ungakwakha Kanjani

Ukuvikeleka ebudlelwaneni umuzwa wokuphepha ngokomzwelo, ukwethembana, kanye nokuzinza okuvumela bobabili abalingani bazizwe bamukelekile, besekelwa, futhi bekhululekile ukuba yibo ngaphandle kokwesaba ukwahlulelwa, ukwenqatshwa, noma ukulahlwa. Uma ubuza ukuthi kuyini ukulondeka ebudlelwaneni, ubuza ngempela ukuthi uthando luzizwa luphephile ngokwanele yini ukuba luphile nsuku zonke, hhayi nje ezinsukwini ezinhle, kodwa nasezinsukwini ezicindezelayo, ezivamile, nezingcolile.

Kusho ukuthini ngempela ukulondeka ebudlelwaneni?

Ezingeni elijulile, ukuphepha kusho ukuthi isimiso sakho sezinzwa asihlali silungiselela ukulimala. Akudingeki ukuthi: 

• Bala wonke umbhalo
• Funda ingozi kukho konke ukulibaziseka
• Noma uzibuze ukuthi ukungavumelani okukodwa kusho ukuthi isibopho siyaphela

Ungaba sengozini futhi uthembeke kodwa ukholwe ukuthi ubudlelwano buzinzile. 

Ubuhlobo obuqinile bunohlangothi olusebenzayo.

• Amazwi nezenzo zomlingani wakho zivame ukufana
• Ukulungiswa kwenzeka ngemva kwengxabano
• Imingcele iyahlonishwa
• Kukhona indawo yokusondelana kanye nobuntu bomuntu ngamunye

Kungani Ukuvikeleka Kubalulekile Ebudlelwaneni

Uma kukhona ukuphepha, uyakwazi ukuba ngumuntu wakho wangempela. Ungakwazi: 

• Vuma ukwesaba
• Cela induduzo
• Imikhawulo yesifundazwe
• Futhi ube namaphutha akho ngaphandle kokucabanga ukuthi ukwethembeka kuzokulahlekisela ubuhlobo 

Ukuvikeleka kushintsha nendlela ingxabano ezwakala ngayo. Ingxabano ngokwayo ayibufakazi bokuthi ubudlelwano buphukile . Yonke imibhangqwana iyaphikisana. Impilo iyenzeka, ukucindezeleka kuthinta isimo sakho sengqondo, futhi abantu bayadumazana. Umehluko ukuthi imibhangqwana evikelekile ayibheki zonke izinkinga njengereferendum yothando. Banamathuba amaningi okukhulumisana ngempumelelo futhi babone ukwesekwa okwengeziwe.

Ngaphandle kokulondeka, ubudlelwano buvame ukuzizwa bungazinzile futhi bukhathazekile. 

• Imicimbi emincane ishaya kakhulu kunalokho okufanele
• Impendulo ebambezelekile ingazwakala sengathi yenqatshwa
• Isicelo sesikhala singazwakala sengathi siyalahlwa

Ucwaningo mayelana nokungathembani kanye nokungazethembi kokuthandana lubonisa ukuthi ukungazethembi kungadala umona, ukucabanga okusolisayo, kanye nokwanda kwezingxabano. 

Izimpawu Zobudlelwano Obuphephile

Uma ufuna ukuqaphela ukuphepha empilweni yangempela, yeka ukufuna izikhathi zama-movie othando. Funa amaphethini. Ubuhlobo obuphephile buchazwa ukuphepha ngokomzwelo, ukwethembana, kanye nenhlonipho ehlangene . Bobabili abalingani bazizwa bebalulekile ngaphandle kokudinga ukuqinisekiswa noma ukulawulwa okuqhubekayo.

• Ungaveza imizwa ngaphandle kokwesaba ukuthi izohlekwa usulu, incishiswe, noma isetshenziswe ngokumelene nawe kamuva 
• Ukuxhumana kuvulekile futhi kuqondile kaningi kunokuba kugwemeke, kuvikele, noma kugcwele imidlalo yokuqagela 
• Uyazethemba izinhloso zomlingani wakho ngokwanele kangangokuthi awudidanisi konke ukungapheleli nokukhashelwa 
• Kukhona ukuzimela okunempilo. Ungaba nezinto ozithandayo, imicabango yakho, kanye nendawo yakho ngaphandle kokuzizwa usongelwa yisibopho. 
• Izingxabano ziyaxazululwa kunokuba zingcwatshwe, zinwetshwe, noma ziguqulwe zibe ukuhlaselwa kwabalingiswa 
• Ukusekelwa kuyaguquguquka. Umlingani wakho uvame ukufika, alandelele, futhi akwenze uzizwe ucatshangelwa 
• Imingcele iyahlonishwa. Isikhathi sodwa, imikhawulo engokwenyama, ubumfihlo, kanye nezindinganiso zomuntu siqu azibhekwa njengezinsongo 
• Umuntu oyedwa akaqondisi buthule lonke ubudlelwano 
• Uzizwa uzolile kakhulu kunokudideka 

Uma ufuna ukuhlola ukuthi ubudlelwano bakho buphephile yini, bheka izinsuku zakho ezivamile. 

• Ungakwazi yini ukuba nguwe ngoLwesibili okhathele? 
• Ungakhuluma ngento exakile? 
• Ungakwazi yini ukuzwa ukuthi “cha” ngaphandle kokuzwa ukuthi “angikuthandi”? 

Lezi zivivinyo ezincane zikutshela okungaphezu kwalokho okuyokwenzeka uma uzimemezela.

Ukufunda Okuhlobene: Izimpawu Eziyi-15 Zokuhambisana Kobudlelwano Phakathi Kwakho Nomlingani Wakho

Izinhlobo Zokuphepha Ebudlelwaneni

Ukuvikeleka ebudlelwaneni kungafaka phakathi ukuvikeleka ngokomzwelo, ukuphepha ngokomzimba, ukuqina kwezezimali, kanye nokuvikeleka kwesikhathi esizayo noma ukuzibophezela. Uma ngisho nenye yalezo zindawo ingazinzile, ubudlelwano bungase buzizwe bungaphephile naphezu kokuba kukhona uthando. 

• Ukuvikeleka ngokomzwelo kusho ukuthi ungazizwa, ukhulume, futhi uzidinga izinto ngaphandle kwesijeziso 
• Ukuvikeleka ngokomzimba kusho ukuthi akukho ubudlova, ukuphoqelelwa, ukwesatshiswa, ukulandelela, noma ukucindezelwa ngokocansi
• Ukuphepha okusebenzayo kuhlanganisa ukuthi imali iphathwa ngendlela ezwakala ilungile futhi inesibopho 
• Ukuvikeleka kwesikhathi esizayo kusho ukuthi uyazi ukuthi umi kuphi. Awuzami njalo ukuqagela izinga lokuzibophezela 

Ukufunda Okuhlobene: Izinto ezi-5 ezenziwa amadoda ukuze enze owesifazane azizwe engavikelekile

Yini Ebangela Ukuntuleka Kokuphepha Ebudlelwaneni

Ukungazethembi akuvamile ukuvela ngokungazelelwe. Esikhathini esiningi, kukhula ngenxa yomlando kanye nezindlela zobudlelwano zamanje. Izimbangela ezivamile zifaka phakathi okuhlangenwe nakho okubuhlungu kwesikhathi esidlule, ukuzethemba okuphansi , ukuphuka kokuthembana, ukungaguquguquki, ukuxhumana okungekuhle, kanye nezindlela zokunamathelana ezingavikelekile njengokunamathelana okukhathazekayo noma okugwemayo.

1. Okuhlangenwe nakho kwesikhathi esidlule

Ingqondo yakho ifunda kokuhlangenwe nakho kwesikhathi esidlule. Abantu abalindele okubi kakhulu kubalingani babo ngokuvamile yilabo abaye baphila ngalezi zinto ezilandelayo: 

• Ukukhohlisa
• Ukukhishwa
• Ukungathembeki
• Ukunganaki
• Noma ubudlelwano obungahlelekile ngokomzwelo

Okuhlangenwe nakho kwabo kwangaphambilini kubonakala ngesimo sezinkinga zokuthembana ngisho nalapho umlingani wamanje ezama ukwenza izinto ngendlela ehlukile futhi enganikezanga sizathu sokuzingabaza.

Ukufunda Okuhlobene: Izindlela Ezi-8 Zokuzivikela Lapho Uthandana Nendoda Engasiyona

2. Ukuzinyeza

Uma usuvele ukholelwa ukuthi kulula ukukushiya noma kunzima ukukuthanda, ngisho nokungavumelani okuncane noma izingxabano kuzwakala njengobufakazi. Futhi, njengoba besho, ukuqhathanisa kuyisela lenjabulo. Izinkundla zokuxhumana zingakwenza ulinganise iqiniso lakho ngokuqhathanisa nokwenza okuhle komuntu, okulimaza kakhulu ukuzethemba kwakho. 

3. Ukuthembana okuphukile

Ukuphuka kokwethembana kungenye imbangela enkulu futhi kudinga ukuqondwa kangcono. Ukuthembana akulimazwa yizindaba kuphela. Kulimaza futhi uma umuntu: 

• Amanga ngokuphindaphindiwe
• Ifihla ulwazi oluyinhloko
• Iyanyamalala uma uyidinga kakhulu
• Iyakuhlazisa
• Noma kukwenza uzizwe ukunganakwa ngokomzwelo

Ukufunda Okuhlobene: Izidingo Eziyi-10 Ezibalulekile Zomzwelo Ebudlelwaneni

4. Ukuhlukumeza

Okunye umehluko kubalulekile. Ngezinye izikhathi abantu bathi ubudlelwano abuphephile uma inkinga enkulu kuwukuxhashazwa. Akuyona inkinga yokuxhumana kuphela uma kukhona:

• Udlame lomzimba
• Ukuphoqwa ngokocansi
• nokulandelela
• Izinsongo
• Noma ulaka lwengqondo

Lena inkinga ejulile kakhulu engaxazululwa ngokuqinisekiswa kuphela. Ezimweni ezinjalo, isikhathi esiningi, kungcono ukuhamba ngenxa yokuphepha kwakho kunokuhlala usebenzele kuyo.

Indlela Yokwakha Ukuvikeleka Ebudlelwaneni

Manje njengoba sesikhulume ngokuthi kusho ukuthini ukuphepha ebudlelwaneni, into elandelayo ebalulekile ukuthi ungakwakha kanjani. Ukuvikeleka akwakhiwe kakhulu ngezithembiso kunangokulawulwa okuphindaphindiwe nokwethembeka. Lokho kungase kuzwakale kucacile. Kucacile. Yingakho kusebenza. 

1. Khuluma ngokucacile nangokungaguquguquki

Yisho ukuthi usho ukuthini ngaphambi kokuba uzizwe ukhululekile. Ukuphepha kuyawohloka lapho abantu ababili beqhubeka nokuphila: 

• Amacebo
• Uvivinyo
• Silence
• Futhi izibikezelo

Bese kuthi ngezikhathi ezithile, udonga luqhekeke bese kufika ukhukhulelangoqo wokulahla imizwa . Lokhu kudala iphethini engalindelekile. Yingakho, okuvulekile, futhi okubaluleke kakhulu, ukuxhumana okuqhubekayo kuyadingeka ukuze kugcinwe ubudlelwano obuzinzile.

Ukukhulumisana okuvulekile kusho nokunciphisa ukuzifihla. Ucwaningo olulodwa luthole ukuthi ukufihlela umlingani izinto kuhlotshaniswa nokwaneliseka nokuzibophezela okuphansi kobudlelwano, kanti ukufihla kwansuku zonke kwabikezela inhlalakahle ephansi yobudlelwano ngosuku olulandelayo. Uma uhlala uzihlela, isibopho asikwazi ukukhululeka ngokuphelele.

Ukufunda Okuhlobene: Amathiphu Ochwepheshe Angu-9 Okukhulisa Ubuhlobo Nsuku Zonke

2. Yakha ukwethembana ngezenzo

Le ngxenye ayikhangi, yingakho ibalulekile. 

• Ushaya ucingo ngesikhathi uthi uzoshaya ucingo
• Ukhuluma iqiniso ngaphambi kokubanjwa
• Ulandela ngemuva kwempikiswano
• Awudlali ngothando ukuze uzizwe unamandla

Ukuphepha akuvamile ukudalwa ngesenzo esisodwa esikhulu. Kudalwa amakhulu ezenzo ezincane zokuthembeka. 

3. Hlonipha imingcele kanye nobuntu

Ukusondelana ngaphandle kwemingcele kufana nokunamathelana. Imingcele ngaphandle kokusondelana ifana nebanga. Ukuvikeleka kuphakathi nendawo. Ubudlelwano obuhle bugcina isikhala semicabango ehlukene, izintshisekelo ezihlukene, ubumfihlo, kanye nokuphumula. Ngakho-ke khuluma ngezidingo zakho. Bhala phansi ukuthi yini ekwenza uzizwe uphephile ebudlelwaneni ngaphambi kwengxoxo yakho elandelayo enzima. Cacisa ngendlela ebuhlungu.

• Mhlawumbe ukubheka emehlweni
• Mhlawumbe akuphazanyiswa
• Mhlawumbe ukuzwa ukuthi, “Ngicasukile, kodwa ngilapha” 

Uma ungakwazi ukuyibiza ngegama, umlingani wakho unethuba elincane kakhulu lokuyinikeza. 

Ukufunda Okuhlobene: Izindlela Ezi-9 Eziphumelelayo Zokuxazulula Izinkinga Zomndeni Ezixubile

4. Yiba khona ngokomzwelo, hhayi ngokomzimba kuphela

Umlingani angaba khona ngokomthetho kodwa angabi khona ngokomzwelo. Ukuvikeleka kuyakhula lapho umuntu ngamunye esabela ngokwanele ukuqaphela: 

• Amabhidi okuxhumana
• Usizi
• Nezinguquko ezicashile zesimo sengqondo

Impendulo elula ethi “Bekunjani usuku lwakho?” ingaba yindlela yokulungisa ubudlelwano obufunayo.

“Uyabona uma ukuziphatha kwami ​​​​kungafanele, ungumngane wami omkhulu futhi ungibonile ngidlula ezigabeni zempilo yengqondo futhi ungibuza ukuthi ngilungile yini”

- Umsebenzisi we-Reddit

5. Lungisa izingxabano ngokushesha

Akudingeki uxazulule konke ukungezwani ngokushesha, kodwa kudingeka uyeke ukuphatha izingxabano njengomsindo wangemuva. Ukulungiswa okusheshayo nokuphumelelayo kuyadingeka ebudlelwaneni ngoba isikhathi eside sobutha singenza ukulimala kuhlale isikhathi eside. Ukungaxazululi inkinga kungaholela nasekuziphatheni okukhulu kwezingxabano njengokugxeka, ukushintshana icala , ukuphoqelela, kanye nokwedelela. Kalula nje, ukuhoxisa impi kuvame ukwenza ukwesaba kube kukhulu kunenkinga. Ukulungiswa okuhle kuzwakala kanje:

• "Ngiyabona ukuthi kungani lokho kukuzwisa ubuhlungu" 
• "Ngizivikela. Ake ngizame futhi" 
• "Ngidinga imizuzu engamashumi amabili, kodwa ngiyabuya" 

Ukufunda Okuhlobene: Ukuthanda Umuntu Vs Ukuba Sothandweni – Umehluko Oqotho Oyi-15

6. Dala ubulungisa, ukucaca, kanye nokusebenzisana njengeqembu

Lena enye yezingxenye zokuphepha ezinganakwa kakhulu. Abantu bazizwa bephephile uma ubuhlobo buzizwa bulungile. Lokho kuhlanganisa: 

• Ilungelo elifanayo ezinqumweni
• Ukusatshalaliswa ngokulinganayo kwemithwalo yemfanelo
• Ukucaca okwanele 
• Futhi umuzwa wokuthi lo mbhangqwana usebenza njengeqembu kunokuba ube yizimbangi ezimbili

Ngenxa yokuthi umphakathi ugxile kakhulu kumadoda, umthwalo wokugcina ubudlelwano bulungile, kaningi, uwela emadodeni. Iningi labesifazane linemithwalo yemfanelo eminingi kanye nomthwalo wengqondo ebudlelwaneni kuyilapho lithola isabelo esincane ekwenzeni izinqumo. Lokhu kungabenza bazizwe sengathi abakwazi ukuthembela kubalingani babo.

Ngakho-ke, yini eyenza owesifazane azizwe ephephile ebudlelwaneni? 

• Ukuthembeka, 
• Ukuhlonipha imingcele yakhe
• Ukuziphendulela okuzolile
• Futhi ukungabikho kokuhlazeka

7. Thatha ukuphepha okusebenzayo ngokungathi sína futhi

Ukuvikeleka ngokomzwelo kubalulekile, kodwa ukungazinzi okungokoqobo kusengalimaza isibopho. Ukukhathazeka ngezezimali kuhlotshaniswa nalokhu: 

• Okuphansi ukwaneliseka kobuhlobo
• Imibono engasekeli kakhulu ngesikhathi sokungavumelani
• Nokuxhumana okubi okwengeziwe

Lokho akusho ukuthi imibhangqwana idinga ingcebo ukuze izizwe iphephile. Kusho ukuthi isiphithiphithi mayelana nemali, ukusetshenziswa kwemali okufihliwe, ukuphika, kanye nokungakhathali kungakwenza uqaphele ukuthi uthando kuphela alwanele ukuze kube nobudlelwano obuphumelelayo. 

8. Thola ukwesekwa kochwepheshe 

Ngezinye izikhathi ukuqinisekiswa okuphindaphindiwe akwanele ngoba inxeba likhulu. Ukukhashelwa, ukudelela okungapheli, ukuhlukumezeka okudala, noma ubudlelwano obuqeqeshe bobabili abantu ezindimeni ezimbi kungenza ukuzilungisa kube nzima. Ezimweni ezinjalo, ukufuna ukwelashwa, kungaba ngabanye noma njengombhangqwana, kungaba yisihluthulelo sokusindisa ubudlelwano benu.

Ubudlelwano Obuphephile Nobungavikelekile

Okwamanje, ukuthi yini ukuphepha ebudlelwaneni kufanele kuzwakale kungacacile. Ukuze kucace, ithebula elingezansi libonisa umehluko phakathi kobudlelwano obuphephile nobungavikelekile.

Ubudlelwano Obuphephile	Ubudlelwano Obungavikelekile
Ukuzola Nokuzinza	Ukungaqiniseki nokukhathazeka
Ukuxhumana okuvulekile	Ukugwema nokuqagela
Ukuphepha ngokomzwelo	Ukwesaba ukwahlulela
Ukusondelana okulinganiselayo kanye nokuzimela	Ukubambelela ngokweqile noma ukuziphatha okude
Ingxabano iholela ekulungiseni	Ingxabano iholela ekwandeni noma ekuthuleni
Ukungaguquguquki kwezenzo	Izimpawu ezixubile kanye nokungabikezeleki
Ukubambisana	Ukuzabalaza kwamandla
Ukusekelwa kuzwakala kutholakala njalo	Ukusekelwa kuzwakala kunemibandela noma kungekho

Imibuzo Evame Ukubuzwa 

Imicabango Final

Ekugcineni, ukuphepha akusikho ukuphelela. Kuwukungaguquguquki, ukwethembana, ukuphepha ngokomzwelo, kanye nokuzimisela okufanayo ukulungisa. Kuyikhono lokuba nobuntu obuphelele komunye nomunye futhi uzizwe uphephile ngokuyisisekelo. Uma ukhumbula umusho owodwa, ake kube yilo: ubuhlobo obuphephile buvame ukwenza uzizwe uzolile, ungadideki. Lokho akusho ukuthi akukho ubuhlungu, akukho ukucindezeleka, noma akukho ukungqubuzana. Kusho ukuthi ubuhlobo ngokwabo abuzizwa njengosongo olukhulu.

Ubudlelwano Obuvikelekile - Buyini Futhi Bubukeka Kanjani?

Izindlela Eziyisi-8 Zokuhlakulela Ukuphepha Kwemizwelo Ebudlelwaneni Bakho

Izimpawu Eziyisi-9 Zokunganeliseki Ebudlelwaneni

Umnikelo wakho awuyona iminikelo yokusiza . Kuzovumela i-Bonobology ukuthi iqhubeke nokukulethela ulwazi olusha nolusesikhathini njengoba sifuna ukusiza noma ubani emhlabeni ukuthi afunde ukwenza noma yini.