Have you ever found yourself feeling jealous and ended up wondering, is jealousy healthy in a relationship? There is no precise right or wrong answer to that question. Jealousy can destroy relationships on one hand, but on the other, it can also bring partners closer.
Is jealousy bad? It can be, yes. But know that it is what makes us most human. Each one of us has been jealous in a relationship at some point. It is all how we deal with that jealousy that can determine whether it is really good or bad for a relationship or not.
You cannot always stop yourself from feeling jealous. It is second nature to us. But what you can do is deal with it in the right way. If you use healthy coping mechanisms to address jealousy, you will come out feeling stronger and better. But if you use jealousy to try to make your partner feel smaller or insignificant, well then, you have lost the battle.
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Jealousy In Relationships
A lot of people will tell you that jealousy is the root cause of all problems in a relationship. While it is true that overdoing it might lead to a lot of issues, a little bit of jealousy is actually okay because, in the end, that’s what makes us human. In fact, healthy jealousy can help build stronger relationships.
I mean, I still get jealous when my mom looks too proud of one of her students. It is childish, I know, yet it is hardly something I can control. Is jealousy a sign of love? It can be in small amounts. It is kind of cute when people tend to get jealous when they think someone is hitting on their partner.
Every time women at a club try to talk to Roy, his girlfriend gets a little bit jealous and annoyed. Roy thinks it is adorable to see Lisa sulking that way because it helps him realize how much she truly cares for him.
So if you’re asking, ‘Is it okay to be jealous?’, I say yes it certainly is! Here are a few reasons why I think it is okay to be ‘that’ person in certain situations:
1. It lets your partner know you care
A little bit of jealousy means that you love the person so much that you are possessive about them. You definitely want them to be exclusively yours. Unless you do not act too much on your jealousy, it is okay to have these feelings.
Even when they’re at work or going to parties, you just want them to be yours. And even if that sounds bad, it is adorable and shows them you love them that much more. Is jealousy healthy in a relationship? It is if it helps your partner realize how much they mean to you.
Related Reading: Where love dwells, jealousy follows?
2. It is kind of cute
Admit it; it is kind of cute when someone gets possessive about you. Imagine you guys had a fight and they are so mad at you that they won’t talk to you. While the relationship arguments that ensue may not be cute, knowing that your partner wants you so badly certainly is.
Try talking to someone new as if you genuinely enjoy their company. Soon your partner will be running up to you guys so they can establish their territory.
3. You will both try harder
Is being jealous bad? Not really, because it forces one to re-assess a relationship and try to make it better than ever. This is because you need to work on regaining the trust. This means that you will put that much more effort and work into your relationship.
Roy was once jealous of Lisa constantly hanging out with a lot of guy friends from her workplace. Every day after work, she would have drinks with them and this would make Roy really unhappy. Instead of yelling at Lisa or throwing a tantrum, Roy started planning lovely dates for Lisa to help her relax after work. This made Lisa feel super special and changed their relationship for the better.
It can also help one realize how much they truly love the other person. The whole dynamics actually will be better because jealousy eventually leads to better communication between the couple. Just remember to talk to your significant other, honestly and openly whenever you find yourself in throes of jealousy.
4. It spices up your relationship
Jealousy is like garam masala for your relationship. You work through the problems between you two, and start doing impulsive stuff like you did when you started off with the relationship. There are good things about jealousy.
Is jealousy normal in a relationship? It is and it can also be good for a relationship. When you and your partner two care about each other, jealousy can act as a much-needed nudge to get you to do things with a panache that was otherwise stalled in your life because you two had settled into a routine. The fact that the normal gets renewed makes relationships that much better.
Related Reading:11 Strategies To Stop Being Jealous And Controlling in Relationships
5. The make-up sex is amazing
Yes, jealous can result in some really good sex. The fights will be terrible. You will be screaming nasty things at each other. They will ask you to stop smothering them and you will tell them to go away. But, in the end, when you do makeup, the sex will be hot enough to blow both of your minds out.
You will use your body as a weapon poised against them leaving and they will answer back saying they never will. It does not get any better than that, to be honest.
Jealousy, in the end, is as normal as bread on butter. And all bread is dull bread without butter. But perhaps over-buttering can lead to some problems. Bread spread jokes aside, jealousy does after all make you human. It also lets both of you know that you care enough to not be able to live without each other. So, honey, the next time you feel the familiar trickle of white-hot envy, chin up.
After all, it doesn’t make you a bad person or lover if you are actually working toward building a better relationship. So is jealousy healthy in a relationship? Our verdict is yes. As long as you tackle it in the right way, you will sail through and maybe even emerge as a better partner.
FAQs
It is. If one is indifferent, then they are probably not in love. When you are in love with somebody, you want their attention and you want them to only be yours. A little jealousy is not a bad thing but is a sign that you care about your partner deeply.
Healthy jealousy is experiencing the emotion in its mildest form. Things like when a girl is commenting on your boyfriend’s pics or hitting on him at a bar. It is inconsequential in most cases but sweet at the end of the day. As long as no major arguments ensue, such kind of jealousy is healthy as it makes you realize how important your partner is to you.
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2 comments
Phew! Finally an article that talks true of jealousy. Yes I find it too cute when my partner tends to get jealous of other guys here although I hate it when the same thing follows to me. And yes It is like a GARAM MASALA to your relationship.. AGREE
Actually, right. I never thought of it in this way. It’s okay to be jealous but not all the time, at times it is perfectly fine.
So, can we say jealousy can be coined as love’s destroyer but it can also reignite the love you have for your partner?