Affair and Cheating

He cheated on me but wants me to take him back

He cheated on her but now he wants to be back with her. Should she agree?
A couple with relationship problems, at coffee shop

(As told to Dua Prayaag)

He would always come receive me from airports and train stations. No, I never wanted him to pick up my bags. My suitcases had wheels, I could drag them. I didn’t realise he had started getting uncomfortable with a strong independent woman like me. It’s only when I caught him cheating on me that I understood what he was missing. He preferred the kohl eyed, saree clad siren.

It had been two years, yet every time I came back from a trip, I would imagine a Hollywood style entry of the villain turned hero of my life, waiting with a rose and an apology at the station.

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  1. I caught my wife slepping with my friend. She was devastated but held on to me. I loved her but the love was painful. I see her and imagine the things he desired which his eyes fallen upon. He felt which was mine in his hands and Cock (harsh but true). I asked her many questions to answers I did not want to know but it happened. Comparison comparison comparison!!! madness. I wanted to hurt her. I made it obvious her life meant nothing to me… luckily murder was not easy. Yet she held on. 3 months of verbal abuse which she believed she deserved, got to the decision there was no hope. A plane ticket home away from me. I made the call for her return and when I returned to the room she broke into million pieces… I saw the mistake for what it was. That moment my words changed to love which caused pain. Time to rebuild with CAUTION. She was afraid like any couple how would WE forget in forgiveness. Will it come up during our marriage. Maybe in every fight. I told her never will I forget but forgiveness I truly gave her. I am not childish and will never throw it to her again. What I forgive on earth; God in heaven does not hold over her. She was free from her mistake. I took it. Her encounter is part of me. I am 26years with my wife (20years after the event). Never once brought it up. No matter how hot some fights got.

    Forgiveness is a hard decision. It doesn’t work for everybody. Sometimes it is short lived… This successful event came from me. I had to make it work. It was not up to my wife to move my world. The more I did the stronger the relationship become.

    For this girl it will be up to you. You have to show him that it was worth coming back to you. Just the fact that he want to come back is already in your favor. You don’t have to try hard. The magic you have cannot be escaped. It is that magic true to you which draws him to return.
    Don’t be a bitch and mentioned it anymore… when he does fall again then “kill” him, making him invincible. He does not exist. Until then the power and to make this work is up to you. Don’t expect the world to be moved by him. The more love you give the more his dark cloud reminds him how fortunate he is. If you expect him to step up. Everything he does to win you over will also feed him his own love for you in mind. That is false love. Your boundary will not move to satisfaction unless YOU make it move. Reality it will crush and burn to ashes. You will loose him.

    Now you know what you up against. I made it work.
    Good luck with your choice

  2. An old Chinese saying – when you break porcelain, you can fix it together but the crack will always remain. Be friends, but buy new porcelain. Move on!

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