What is it like to be a Sugar Baby? This is my story
I am a Sugar Baby. I know, it’s not something you will approve of. You might scorn me. Or even call me names. But this is my reality. Now, if you don’t know what a sugar baby is, let me explain. It is when a rich man takes care of you financially in exchange for company and sex. No, it’s not prostitution. You have to give the company. Talk to him. Travel with him. And party with him. In exchange, you will have a lot of financial gains and gifts.
I was born into a lower-middle-class family. By 22 I was working as a maths teacher in a private school in a small town in India. By 23 I was married to another teacher. He taught English in another school. He was 25 then. We moved into a one-bedroom apartment in a decent colony. By 25, I was the mother of a son. Then, it was mostly school and raising him. We lived a normal life. Ate at home. Went to places like Shimla or Manali once a year in the summer breaks.
I don’t know if I loved my life or just went with it. But this was the life I knew.
Then it all went downhill
Until one day my husband decided to open a coaching institute. He found a partner. I was apprehensive. Something did not feel right. But I gave in to his persuasion. Also, I thought maybe it was our only way to a better life. We invested all we had.
But my fears came true. The partner cheated. We had nothing left. Even the papers he signed were forged. So here we were. My husband was jobless. We had debts. A son to take care of. And the only income was my salary, which I assure you is not much. My husband was almost blacklisted from the teaching fraternity because the news went around, that he scammed kids in his coaching and ran away with the money. So we were not sure if he would ever find a job. It became darker each day. He was diagnosed with clinical depression. That also meant more bills.
Six months down the line things were becoming unbearable. People close to us almost deserted us. Who wants to be with broke people who had a scandal to their name? The thing with small towns is that everyone knows about everything. Then my father died and my mom came to live with us. Her presence was the only relief.
I found out about sugar daddies and sugar babies
I felt cheated from all quarters. It was a summer night and I was weeping in our balcony. Between tears, I scrolled through Facebook. I saw a headline that read “Sugarbaby”. At first I thought it was about babies who were addicted to anything sweet, like my son was. I opened the link. It was far, far from what I thought. It talked about a consensual relationship between a man and a woman that involved money and long-term association. In which mostly the man was married.
I still remember it was 2 at night. Everything was silent. I Googled the term “Sugar Baby.” And I found websites where you can register as one and pick and choose your sugar daddy. Was this the way out of our debt and misery, because the calls and humiliations from debtors were mounting? Court notices were slapped. My husband was still in therapy.
After two days of contemplation, I decided to give it a try. I was 32. I thought I had a chance. This is against all the morals I was raised on. But my strong morals did not help our sufferings. I registered on a site. Within half an hour, I was bombarded with requests. Most men were above 35. What amazed me was that men came with their real identity. And on the first go they revealed their place and location. There were men who looked for long-term relationships. Others wanted something for a week or two. The money offered was more than what I saw in a year.
Choosing my sugar daddy
Most men were from cities. They had money, wealth and power. I zeroed in on two men. I left my number, and they called. The first one was 38. He had a garment business, a father of two daughters. Married for 16 years, he said he was bored. He already had a sugar baby, but she got married and left the country. The other guy was also a businessman. He had farms and exported food grains across the world. He too was the father of two daughters and was lonely in his marriage. Both asked me to quote a price. I blindly quoted a sum. Without missing a breath, they agreed. I wondered if money ever mattered to them.
Finally, I chose the 40-year-old, because he was in Delhi, which was closer to where I lived. The day I agreed, a quarter of the fees agreed upon were wired. In all honesty, it was more money than I earned in two months. When I saw the text message on my mobile, I almost cried. The first thing I did was go to the ATM, take out the money and repay the first debt. At least from now, one less phone call demanding money. One less phone call humiliating my husband. I even took a picture while handing out the money so that it cannot be denied later. I’d already lost faith in people.
Related reading: Confessions of a sex call operator
The sugar daddy I chose
So, that’s how it began. The deal was, I had to talk to Sahil Mehta, my sugar daddy every day, mostly on chats. And travel with him once a month, in India or abroad for 3 days to a week. I made up a story that I would teach my sugar daddy’s kids when they travel once a month. My husband agreed and so did my mother. I told my school that each month I would take a few days off for my husband’s treatment. I agreed to a 20% cut on my salary.
The first time I met Sahil was in Delhi. He booked a hotel suite for me. I took the first bus and reached around 11 am. A car picked me up. And I walked into a 7-star hotel. The grandeur made me uneasy. The room was huge with so much space. I thought how much my son would love playing here. I had a shower and changed into jeans and T-shirt. There was a knock, and in came my sugar daddy, Sahil. A well built athletic man. He smiled and sat right opposite me.
It was not just sex he wanted
He ordered wine and started conversing, asking about my life. This was the first time someone actually asked me how I felt about anything. I told him everything. And cried. He listened patiently. Came closer and hugged me gently. Strangely it felt nice. He felt warm.
We lay on the bed, talking. He was well read, well travelled and a successful man. He talked of things I never thought existed. For those 2 hours, I felt so good. When he hugged, I felt his hands down my T-shirt. I did nothing to stop him. He started kissing me. It was a year since I had sex with my husband. Suddenly my body craved Sahil. I wanted him to continue kissing. As I encouraged him to undress me, I undressed him. I wanted more of his skin, his flesh. My body was almost begging him to go on and on. And he did not disappoint. Once I was tired and satisfied, I let his body go. He was smiling and caressing me. It was getting late. I dressed hurriedly. He put a stack of money in my hand and asked me to get my passport ready.
Related reading: 5 reasons why extramarital affairs are more open now
I began repaying our debt
He dropped me back at the bus stop. Four hours later, I was back in our town. But the first thing I did is to go to someone else’s house and repay a part of the loan. My heart was lighter. My feet had a spring. Something felt so good. I did not remember the last time I felt this way.
Life moved on as usual but with less debt. Sahil called me every day. We exchanged texts whenever he was at work. It feels nice that he treats me as an equal. We decided that the money will be wired every first of the month. And after that he never talked about it. I was his companion. His girlfriend.
The first trip I made with him was to Mumbai. It was for three days. We stayed in a 5-star property. Once he finished his work, we went for dinner or just hung out. I met his friends too. So many came with their sugar babies. I wondered if their wives knew. I know I will be called vile if anyone knows about it. But the men would go scot-free.
I know I will be called vile if anyone knows about it. But the men would go scot-free.
So much for society.
The money kept coming on time. The debts kept decreasing. The first time I travelled abroad was to Singapore, for Sahil’s conference. Later I travelled to Malaysia and Dubai too. Money adds so much beauty to life. Good food, travel, clothes and so much luxury. Things I could have never imagined before. But I know my place. I never try to go beyond, unless he wants to share. Eventually he shares almost everything in our pillow talk.
Things are much better for me now
It’s been a few months. In another three months, all debts should be cleared. Also, now that we are paying back everyone, we are being accepted back in society. People don’t mock us too much. My husband is doing better in therapy. I look forward to meeting Sahil once a month. He does too.
Will I leave him once the debts are clear? Right now, I want this to continue. I just want to be selfish and happy. No, I have no intention of leaving my family. But I want to accompany Sahil too. Sahil wants it to be a long lasting relationship. You may say I am a slut. Or the other woman in the relationship, which one should never be. But I am very clear. If his marriage was that strong, he would not have been looking out for other women. It’s mutual. I am not breaking up his marriage. In fact, he is a happy man and gives more to his family. And the same for with me.
Now it’s not just the money
True, I started it for money. Now, it has become a part of my happiness. I don’t promote this. There is no glory in being a sugar baby.
There is no glory in being a sugar baby.
Yes, Sahil treats me very well. But I have met sugar babies who are not treated well. They stay for the cash and move on whenever the needs are met.
But for me, this is like a dream ride I got suddenly one fine day. I want it to continue, at least for some time now!