Si chinsinsi kuti tonsefe timanama mu ubale wathu. Kaya ndi ndemanga yakuti "mukuwoneka bwino" mnzanuyo atameta tsitsi latsopano kapena kuwauza kuti mukugwira ntchito mochedwa pamene inu munaima kuti mutenge moŵa angapo ndi ogwira nawo ntchito, mabodza ang'onoang'ono oyerawa ali paliponse. Ndiye, pali akuluakulu amene akhoza kuwomba pa ubwenzi kapena kukusiyani mosimidwa kufunafuna yankho mmene kupeza chidaliro mmbuyo mu ubale pambuyo kunama.
Ngati ndi zomwe mukuchita nazo, mukudziwa mtundu wa chikhulupiliro chosweka chimatengera mgwirizano wa banja. Wokondedwa wanu amavutika kuti akhulupirire chilichonse chimene mumanena ndipo kulakwitsa kwanu kumagwiritsidwa ntchito ngati chikumbutso cha zolephera zanu. Mawu aliwonse amasintha mwadzidzidzi kukhala mkangano. “Kodi ukuyendadi ndi anyamata okhawo?” “Ndi bwenzi chabe eti?” Kukayikitsa ndi zoneneza zitha kusiya ubale wanu pa ayezi woonda.
Ichi ndichifukwa chake kudziwa momwe mungakhazikitsire chikhulupiriro pambuyo pa kunama kumakhala kofunikira. Kukhululuka kungatenge nthawi yake yokoma kuti ibwere. Ngati mumayamikiradi wokondedwa wanu ndi ubale wanu, njira yayitali yopezera chikhulupiliro chawo idzakhala yopindulitsa. Tiyeni tiwone momwe mungayambitsirenso chikhulupiliro muubwenzi mutanama, kuti musakhale ngati mnyamata yemwe analira Nkhandwe. Koma choyamba, tiyeni tione mmene kunama kumakhudzira ubwenzi.
Zotsatira Za Kunama Pa Ubale
M'ndandanda wazopezekamo
Khulupirirani muubwenzi amamva ngati bulangete lofunda pa tsiku lozizira. Bodza liri lonse—kaya liri laling’ono chotani—limabowola m’bulangete ili limene limakupangitsani kumva kukhala wodekha ndi wosungika, ndipo pamene mabodza ameneŵa akuwonjezereka, kutsala zidutswa za bulangeti, kukusiyani inu kukhala wodziŵika, wosasungika, ndi wowopsezedwa kaamba ka ubwino wanu.
Mutha kubisa zinazake zofunika kwa wokondedwa wanu chifukwa mukuopa kuti zomwe angachite sizingakomere, ndipo mumadziwuza nokha kuti, "Ndikuchita izi kuti ndiwateteze". Kapena simungafune kuloŵa nawo ndi mnzanuyo pambuyo pa tsiku lalitali ndipo mukhoza kunama njira yanu yotulutsira mkangano wothekera, kuganiza kuti, “Kupulumutsa madzulo, ndatichitira zabwino tonsefe.” Vuto ndilakuti, ngakhale munganene momveka bwino, kusaona mtima kumakhala ndi njira yomwe ingakupezeni chifukwa mabodza amakula ngati udzu, kutsekereza chikhulupiriro ndi ubwenzi womwe mwayesetsa kuumanga. Umu ndi momwe:
1. Bodza likuchoka pa maziko a kukhulupirirana
Chikhulupiliro ndiye maziko a ubale wabwino. Ngati palibe, ngakhale mgwirizano wamphamvu kwambiri ukhoza kutha. Mukanama, nkhani zokhulupirirana zimayamba kulowa muubwenzi wanu ndipo mnzanuyo angayambe kukayikira zabodza koma china chilichonse chomwe mwanenapo. Mwachitsanzo, ngati munanamizira komwe munali madzulo ena, chifukwa chakuti simunafune kukangana pa nkhani yofuna kucheza ndi anzako m’malo mocheza ndi mnzanuyo, ndipo mnzanuyo n’kupeza kuti, akhoza kudabwa kuti, “Ngati ananamizira zimenezi, n’chiyaninso chimene sakundiuza? Kukayikira kumeneku kumatha kupitilira, kuwasiya akungoganizira zachiwiri.
“Kunama kumayambitsa kusatetezeka kwa mnzawo chifukwa kumasonyeza kuti akubisira chinachake.” Mukayamba kukayikirana, zimakhala zovuta kuti mukhalebe otetezeka m’maganizo.
—Dr. Paul Hokemeyer, wosamalira mabanja, akufotokoza,
2. Mabodza ang'onoang'ono amatha kugwa muzinthu zazikulu
A "bodza loyera” Pano, ulusi wina ukhoza kuoneka ngati wopanda vuto poyamba, koma nthawi zambiri bodza limakhala ndi mphamvu zambiri.
Mwachitsanzo, taganizirani za Jenna ndi Aron. Aron adamunamiza kuti adawononga kwambiri anthu omwe adachitapo kanthu ndipo adatenga ndalamazo kuti alipire ku thumba latchuthi lomwe adathandizira limodzi poganiza kuti sizinali zazikulu. Koma Jenna atazindikira patapita miyezi ingapo, zonse zinasokonekera kwambiri kuposa zimene Aron ankayembekezera, Jenna anapita kukakhala ndi mlongo wakeyo ndipo anamutsekereza kwa milungu ingapo. Zimene anachitazi sizinangokhudza ndalama zokha ayi, koma ankangodziona ngati wosafunika komanso wosocheretsedwa.
3. Kutalikirana kwamalingaliro kumakula
Ukamanamiza mnzako, pamakhala mtunda wobisika, ngakhale atapanda nthawi yomweyo. Mungadzimve kukhala wolakwa, kupewa kuyang’anizana ndi anthu m’maso, kapena kukhala wosamasuka polankhula. Kusiyana kwamalingaliro kumeneku kungayambitse kusungulumwa kapena kusagwirizana mu mgwirizano, kukukanizani nonse. Dr. Harriet Lerner, wolemba Dance of Intimacy, akufotokoza kuti, “Kunama kumawononga ubwenzi umene umakhala wogwirizana.” Kumasuka ndi kuona mtima n’zimene zimathandiza okwatirana kudzimva kuti amawonedwadi ndi kukondedwa monga momwe alili.
Kuwerenga Kofanana: Kutalikirana Kwamalingaliro: Tanthauzo, Zoyambitsa, Zizindikiro, Ndi Njira Zothetsera
4. Kunama kumalepheretsa kulankhulana
N'chifukwa chiyani ubwenzi umatha chifukwa cha mabodza? Chifukwa mukakhala ndi zinthu zobisira wokondedwa wanu, simungakhalenso omasuka komanso osatetezeka nawo. Zotsatira zake, kusamvetsetsana kumakula, mkwiyo umamanga mu ubale, ndipo mumaona ngati simungathe kulankhulana popanda kukangana.
Tinene kuti munanamiza mnzanuyo pazachuma, kusakhulupirika, zovuta zantchito, kapena zina zotere, ndipo tsopano lingaliro loti “akadziwa” likukudyani. Wokondedwa wanu amatha kuona kuti chinachake chalakwika ndipo akakufunsani, simungachitire mwina koma kunena kuti, "Palibe kanthu" kapena "Ndili bwino". Amasiyidwa akungoganiza, ndipo mwina, akungoganizira zochitika zoyipa kwambiri m'mutu mwawo. M’kupita kwa nthaŵi, kusowa poyera kumeneku kungayambitse kukhumudwa ndi mikangano.
Kuwerenga Kofanana: Zinthu 11 Zomwe Zimachitika Popanda Kukhulupirirana
Mitundu 5 Yabodza Imene Ingayambitse Kukhulupirirana Paubwenzi
Monga mukuwonera, kunama pachibwenzi amatanthauza kusweka kukhulupirirana, kufooketsedwa kwa maubale, ndi kusatsimikizirika za tsogolo. Koma kodi mabodza onse amakhudza ubale wanu mwanjira yomweyo? Kodi mukuuza mnzanu kuti mumamukonda chokoleti chomwe adapanga kuyambira pachiyambi ngakhale kuti simunachite zoipa monga kunama zachinyengo kapena kuwabisira zakale? Chabwino, momveka ayi. Mabodza amitundu yosiyanasiyana amakhudza maubwenzi m'njira zosiyanasiyana. Tiyeni tiwone mitundu 5 ya mabodza omwe nthawi zambiri amayambitsa kukhulupirirana mu maubwenzi:
1. Mabodza oyera
Tinene kuti, tonse timauza anzathu mabodza ang'onoang'ono oyera nthawi ndi nthawi. Kuchokera kunena kuti munakonda chovala chatsopano chomwe adagula pamene simunanene kuti mumakonda kucheza ndi amayi awo pamene simungathe kupirira mkaziyo. Ngakhale kuti kunama kuti tipewe kukhudzika kwa mnzako sikwachilendo kapena kovulaza, pamene kuchuluka kwa mabodza kumayamba kuposa kukhulupirika ndi kuwonekera, kungathe kusokoneza mgwirizano wanu.
Vuto ndi mabodza oyera ndikuti mutha kukhala ndi chizolowezi chochita nawo kuthawa zovuta, ndipo ndipamene zinthu zimakhala zovuta. Dr. Bella DePaulo, katswiri wa zamaganizo amene amaphunzira kunama anati: “Ngakhale mabodza ang’onoang’ono angayambitse chizolowezi cha kusaona mtima.
Kuwerenga Kofanana: 11 Zizindikiro Za Kusakhulupirika Mu Ubale
2. Mabodza osiyidwa
Awa si mabodza enieni koma zinthu zomwe simunasankhe kugawana nazo. Mwachitsanzo, osauza mnzanuyo kuti mudakumana ndi munthu wakale pa nkhomaliro kapena kunyalanyaza kutchula kuti ntchito yosangalatsa ola. Ngakhale munganene kuti ndi "zosafunikira," mnzanuyo angaone ngati kusakhulupirika akadziwa. Mabodza osiyidwa kuchuluka kwa chinsinsi mu ubale, zomwe pakapita nthawi, zimapanga mtunda wamalingaliro pakati pa okondedwa.
3. Kukokomeza
Nthawi zina, mutha kutambasula chowonadi kuti muwoneke bwino-monga kunena kuti mwakwaniritsa zomwe simunachite kapena kuwombera zolakwa za mnzanuyo molingana ndi kubisa udindo pazochita zanu. Izi zitha kukulitsa kudzikonda kwanu kwakanthawi, koma mnzanuyo akapeza chowonadi, zitha kuwapangitsa kukayikira kukhulupirika kwanu.
4. Mabodza azachuma
Awa ndi amodzi mwa manda omwe amasiya anthu akudabwa momwe angayambitsirenso kukhulupilira muubwenzi atanama. Si chinsinsi kuti ndalama zimatha kuyambitsa mikangano muubwenzi. Mukayamba kunama pankhani zandalama—kubisa ngongole, kugula zinthu mobisa, kapena kunama za ndalama zimene mumapeza—kuti mupewe mkangano umenewu, ndiye kuti kusakhulupirika pazachuma ndipo kumayambitsa kusakhulupirirana.
"Zinsinsi zandalama nthawi zambiri zimayimira kusakhulupirirana komanso kumasuka muubwenzi."
—Dr. Terri Orbuch, katswiri wa zamaganizo
5. Kusakhulupirika
Kuwonjezera pa chikondi, kukhulupirirana, ndi ulemu, kukhulupirika ndi chimodzi mwa zinthu zofunika kwambiri ziyembekezo mu ubale- chabwino, makamaka muubwenzi wodzipereka, wokhala ndi mwamuna mmodzi. Mukatuluka m'malire a kukhulupirika ndiyeno n'kupita kutali kwambiri kuti mutseke mayendedwe anu, mumawombera maziko onse omwe ubale wanu wakhazikika. Mwa mitundu yonse ya kusaona mtima, ichi ndi chankhanza kwambiri komanso chovuta kuchichira.
Ndicho chifukwa chake anthu nthawi zambiri amavutika kuti adziwe momwe angayambirenso kukhulupirirana muubwenzi pambuyo pa kunama ndi kubera, pamene amapeza kuti amayesetsa momwe angathere, sangathe kupangitsa wokondedwa wawo kuti awakhulupirire kapena kukhala otetezeka nawonso.
Momwe Mungabwezeretsere Chikhulupiliro Mu Ubale Pambuyo Kunama - Zinthu 11 Zomwe Muyenera Kuchita
Mlingo wa bodza ulibe kanthu. Chofunika ndichakuti munanama poyamba. Kaya ndi chinyengo kapena bodza kubisa mayendedwe anu, kupanda ulemu kumaonekera pazochitika zilizonse. Kaya ndinu wabodza kapena munanama kamodzi kokha, njira yomanganso kukhulupirirana paubwenzi nthawi zambiri imakhala yofanana.
Komabe, ngati mungawonere pulogalamu yomwe mumakonda kwambiri popanda iwo kapena mutadya masangweji omwe amasungirako pambuyo pake, sitinganene kuti kupandukira kotheratu kwa mnzanuyo. Zingamveke ngati izo, koma palibe wotchi yobwereza kapena sangweji ina yomwe singathe kukonza. Simufunikanso kulephera kugona momwe mungakonzere ubale pambuyo poti kukhulupirirana kutha pakali pano.
Komabe, mabodza akuluakulu okhudza kusakhulupirika akawululidwa, malingaliro aliwonse okhulupirira paubwenziwo amatuluka pawindo. Musanadziwe, galimoto yanu tsopano ili ndi GPS tracker yolumikizidwa nayo ndipo mauthenga anu akuyang'aniridwa. Palibe amene amafuna kukhala paubwenzi ndi a FBI, ndichifukwa chake kudziwa momwe mungayambitsirenso chikhulupiliro muubwenzi kumakhala kofunika kwambiri mutakhudzidwa ndi chipwirikiti cha kukayikirana.
Ngakhale simungafune china chilichonse koma kukanikiza batani lokhazikitsiranso ndikubwerera momwe zinthu zinalili, palibe zokonzekera mwachangu momwe mungayambirenso kukhulupilira mu ubale mutanama. Kukonza ubale pambuyo pa kunama kudzafuna kudzipereka ndi kuleza mtima. Kuti tikuthandizeni panjira, tiyeni tifufuze zochitika zomanganso kukhulupirirana muubwenzi nthawi yomweyo:
Kuwerenga Kofanana: Kupulumuka Pankhani - Njira 12 Zobwezeretsanso Chikondi Ndi Kukhulupirira Ukwati
1. Choyamba, lekani kunama
Sizikunena kuti kukonza ubale pambuyo pa kunama, muyenera kusiya mabodza nthawi yomweyo. Ndipo nthawi yomweyo, tikutanthauza dzulo. Simungakhale mukufunsa momwe mungakonzere chidaliro mutanama mutakhala pagulu la mabodza omwe amatha kukuwombani pamaso panu mphindi iliyonse.
Kuyambira pano, onetsetsani kuti simukuchita chilichonse ngakhale mutabisala mosamvetsetseka zomwe zimasiya mnzanuyo akuda nkhawa ndi zolinga zanu. Kunama pambuyo pogwidwa chifukwa chake kuli ngati kuganiza kuti kudya shuga kungakonze matenda anu a shuga. Mukungodziipira nokha, ndipo musanadziwe mudzakhala mukudya dessert-kwa-awiri nokha. Ngati simukufuna kukhala ndi dandaulo la “Ndinanama ndikuwononga ubale wanga” kwa moyo wanu wonse, yesetsani kuchita zinthu momasuka ndi mnzanuyo.
Adziwitseni zomwe mukuchita ndi zomwe mudzachita pambuyo pake. Ngati mukuyang'ana zina malo aumwini mu chiyanjano, mufotokozereni mnzanu zimene mukuchita komanso chifukwa chake. Poganizira momwe mungapezere chidaliro mu ubale pambuyo pa kunama kapena kubera, kusiya zomwe zidayambitsa vutolo ndiye chinthu chachikulu chomwe muyenera kuchita.
2. Ganizirani chifukwa chomwe munanamizira poyamba
Kumvetsetsa chifukwa chomwe munanamizira sikungakuthandizeni kudziwa momwe mungayambitsirenso chikhulupiliro mu ubale mutanama komanso kungakutetezeni kuti musapitenso pa dzenje lomwelo la kalulu. Kodi kunali kuopa chiweruzo? Kupewa mikangano? Manyazi? Khalani owona mtima nokha pazifukwa zazikuluzikulu, chifukwa kuzindikira kumeneku kungakuthandizeni kuthana ndi zomwe zimayambitsa ndikukula.
Zingakhale zothandizanso kufotokozera zifukwa izi kwa wokondedwa wanu, koma popanda kutsutsa kapena kumuimba mlandu. Lingaliro apa ndikukhala pachiwopsezo cha kukayikira kwanu, mantha, ndi kusatetezeka kwanu komwe kungakhale kukukakamizani kuti muname, kuwalola kuti akumvereni chisoni, osapangitsa kuti ziwoneke ngati mukunama kwa iwo mwanjira ina.
3. Pemphani chikhululuko moona
Pepani, khalani pansi, si vuto lalikulu, "ndi zomwe muyenera kunena ngati mukufuna kuthamangitsidwa pachibwenzi chanu mwachangu kuposa momwe Usain Bolt amafikira kumapeto. Koma ndithudi si njira yoti mupite ngati mukudabwa momwe mungamangirenso kukhulupirirana muubwenzi mutanama. Kwa izo, muyenera Pepani moona mtima kwa mnzanuyo, ndipo mnzanuyo ayenera kuona kuti zikuchokera pansi pamtima.
Ayi, maluwa ang'onoang'ono sangachite. Pezani zazikulu. M'malo mwake, tulukani ndikuphimba chipinda chonsecho mumaluwa ake omwe amakonda. Tengani bokosi la chokoleti, lembani mawu ochokera pansi pamtima, ndi kuwaphikira chakudya, mayadi asanu ndi anayi onse. Simukutuluka mwa izi mosavuta, mutha kupitanso patali ngati mukuwonetsadi munthu mumamukonda mutamupweteka.
Musamakhumudwitse wokondedwa wanu, musalavule zowona, khalani ndi zonse zomwe munachita ndikunama, ndikuvomereza malingaliro a mnzanuyo. Pemphani chikhululuko ngati mukutanthauza kunena mawu akuti, “Ndinakunama, ndakulepheretsani kundikhulupirira ndipo ndikupepesa kwambiri.
Kuwerenga Kofanana: Kodi Kukhululuka N'chiyani Mumaubwenzi Ndipo Chifukwa Chiyani Ndikofunikira
4. Yesetsani kuchita zinthu moonekera
Kodi mungatani kuti mubwererenso muubwenzi mutatha kunama, mukudabwa? Kukhala buku lotseguka kwa mnzanu ndi malo abwino kuyamba. Kukhazikitsanso chikhulupiriro mu ubale ndi momwe mungakhalire mowonekera. Mukasokoneza ndi kusokoneza chikhulupiriro chawo, atseguleni kwa iwo ndi kuwauza chifukwa chake munachitira izo, ngakhale zitakhala zovuta kwa inu kuvomereza chifukwa chake munachitira izo poyamba.
Ngati munachita chifukwa cha izo, auzeni. Ngati munachita zimenezo chifukwa chakuti mumafuna kuwabwezera chinachake, auzeni, koma ganizirani za thanzi la ubale wanu pamene mukuchita. Ubale suyenera kukhala masewera a chess. Komabe, kumbukirani kufotokoza zifukwa zanu kapena mbali ya nkhaniyo popanda kumveketsa ngati mukuimba mlandu mnzanu kapena kupereka zifukwa za zochita zanu. Pewani mawu otsutsa kapena kusunthitsa mlandu.
Pochita izi, mudzakhala mukufika pansi pakuwunikanso malingaliro anu ndi malingaliro anu. Nchiyani chinakupangitsani inu kuchita zomwe munachita? Munanama bwanji? Mafunso oti muyambitsenso kukhulupirirana muubwenzi angakuthandizeni nonse kudziwa chifukwa chake zidachitika poyamba. M'malo moletsa zizindikiro, yesetsani kuthetsa kufunika konama kuchokera ku mizu.
5. Kupititsa patsogolo kulankhulana muubwenzi wanu
Monga chimodzi mwazofunikira kwenikweni za ubale, kufunikira kwa kukulitsa kulankhulana muubwenzi wanu sichingasinthidwe konse. Izi zimakhala zofunika kwambiri pamene mukuyesera kudziwa momwe mungayambirenso kukhulupirirana mu ubale mutanama. Polankhulana bwino komanso momveka bwino m'tsogolomu, mumachotsa mwayi wobisala chinachake kwa mnzanuyo.
Kupatula apo, palibe kukayikira kuti mnzanuyo akulimbana ndi nkhani zodalirika pambuyo ponamizidwa. Palibe njira yabwinoko yowathandizira kuthana ndi kukaikira kovutirako ndikukukhulupiriraninso kuposa kulimbikitsa kulankhulana moona mtima, momasuka, ndi kuyanjanitsa mu ubale wanu.
Inde, momwe mungabwezeretsere chidaliro mu ubale pambuyo pa kunama kungakhale kophweka monga kukhazikitsa kulankhulana kwabwino ndi kwabwino ndi wokondedwa wanu. Limbikitsani kumasuka kwa wina ndi mnzake, ngakhale mituyo itakhala zinthu zomwe simungafune kukambirana. Kaŵirikaŵiri, amenewo ndiwo makambitsirano ofunika koposa mulimonse.
Ndiye, nthawi ina mnzako akadzanena kuti, “Palibe, ndili bwino”, ndiye msirikali. Osagwedeza phewa lanu ndikupewa zokambiranazo, dziwirani mutu ndikufunsa chifukwa chake sakugawana zomwe akufuna. Ngati muyesetsa kukulitsa kulankhulana kwabwino, sikudzakhala kovuta kupeza mmene mungayambirenso kukhulupirirana muubwenzi.
Kuwerenga Kofanana: Momwe Mungadalire Winawake Akakuvulazani - Upangiri Waukatswiri
6. Khalani bwenzi labwino kwambiri lomwe mungakhale
Ngakhale kupepesa kochokera pansi pamtima kumapangitsa kuti mpirawo ukuyendere bwino, mufunika kuchita zambiri kuposa usiku umodzi wokha wopepesa. Tsopano pakubwera gawo lomwe mumagwira ntchito yopatsa mnzanu ziro zifukwa zoti asakukhulupirireninso. Ngati mukuyesetsa kuti muyambirenso kukukhulupirirani ndi munthu amene munamulakwira, zochita zimamvekadi kuposa mawu.
Onetsetsani kuti tsopano ndinu bwenzi kapena bwenzi labwino kwambiri lomwe mnzanuyo angafunse ndikuwawonetsa kuti ndinu oyenera kuyesetsa kukhazikitsanso chikhulupiriro muubwenzi. Kutikita minofu kumbuyo, chakudya cham'mawa pabedi, kuthandizira, kuwachapira, kuwayendetsa bwino…chabwino, mwina musakhale woperekera chikho wawo, koma mumamva mfundo.
Khalani odalirika, tengerani njira zosonyezera chikondi kwa mnzanuyo, ndipo onetsetsani kuti mnzanuyo akuwona khama lomwe mukuchita mwa kukhala pa zala zanu nthawi zonse. Mukuyesera kudziwa momwe mungabwezeretsere chikhulupiliro mu ubale pambuyo pa kunama? Dziwani zomwe SO yanu ikufuna mwa mnzanu ndikukhala munthu ameneyo. Ndilo chinsinsi chopangitsa mwamuna kukukhulupirirani kotheratu kapena kuti mkazi ayambenso kukukhulupirirani.
7. Dziperekeni kusintha
Kuthana nazo nkhani za trust muubwenzi, mwina chinthu chofunika kwambiri chimene mungachite ndicho kudzipereka ndi mtima wonse kusintha. Lembani makonda kapena zoyambitsa zomwe zidakupangitsani kufuna kubisa chowonadi kwa wokondedwa wanu. Kuwona momwe mungayambirenso kudalirana muubwenzi mutanama kumatha kuwoneka ngati kovuta kwa ambiri chifukwa kumafunikira kuti muwononge machitidwe anu.
Izinso zimafuna kuti muyang'ane mkati, muyang'ane, ndikumvetsetsa chifukwa chake mumachita momwe mumachitira nthawi zina. N’chifukwa chiyani kunama kumaoneka ngati chinthu chosavuta kwa inu kusiyana ndi kucheza ndi mnzanuyo? Bwanji mukuwopa kuwawonetsa mbali zonse za inu nokha osati kubisala kumbuyo kwa mabodza opangidwa mosamala?
Pokhapokha ngati inu otsimikiza za mfundo yakuti muyenera ntchito pa mbali zina za umunthu wanu kuti ubwenzi ntchito, inu movutikira kuika kuyesetsa. Yankho la mmene kumanganso kukhulupirirana mu ubale pambuyo kunama lagona pa kukhala bwenzi yabwino ndi Baibulo la nokha mukhoza kukhala. Konzani chikhutiro m'mbali zina za moyo wanu ndipo simudzamva kufunika kokhala wachinyengo. Ndipo njira zopangira chidaliro paubwenzi zidzatsata.
Kuwerenga Kofanana: Katswiri Akupereka Njira 11 Zothandizira Othandizana Naye Pankhani Zodalirika
8. Patsani mnzanuyo nthawi
Pamafunika nthawi yochuluka, kuleza mtima, ndi khama kuti wina ayambenso kumukhulupirira. Mukasokoneza ndikuphwanya chikhulupiriro cha mnzanu mwa inu, simungayembekezere kuti akukhululukireni nthawi yomweyo. Zidzawatengera nthawi yayitali, ndipo sungakhale wosankha kuti zitenga nthawi yayitali bwanji. "Ndati pepani! Mukufunanso chiyani?" zidzangopangitsa kuti kapu yamadzi idonthe pankhope panu. Pokhapokha ngati mutafuna zimenezo pazifukwa zina, pewani kuumiriza mnzanuyo kuti akukhululukireni.
Mvetserani kuti nkhani zokhulupirirana pambuyo ponamizidwa sizitha msanga. Mumauza mnzanuyo kuti alibe chodetsa nkhawa kapena kumutsimikizira kuti simudzanamanso kapena kuwawonetsa kuti mwadzimvera chisoni sikungathetse mwamatsenga kuwonongeka komwe mabodza anu angayambitse. Akhoza kudzipeza okha osakukhulupirirani, kuwonjezera pa iwo okha.
Pamene mukukanda mutu wanu, "Kodi ndingatani kuti ndibwererenso pachibwenzi?", Chifukwa chatha miyezi 6 ndipo wokondedwa wanu sanathebe momwe munanamizira kwa iwo, mvetsetsani kuti inu nokha simungakonze izi. Wokondedwa wanu ayenera kukhala wotsimikiza 100% ngati angakukhululukireni kapena ayi.
Patsani anu thandizani danga ndi nthawi yomwe amafunikira kuganizira ngati angathe kukukhululukirani. Monga momwe muyenera kudzipereka kuti mukhale munthu wabwino kwambiri yemwe mungakhale, mnzanuyo akuyenera kudziwa ngati ndizobweza mmbuyo zomwe angadutse. Momwe mungayambitsirenso chikhulupiliro mu ubale mutanama zimadaliranso momwe mnzanuyo alili wololera kukukhululukirani ndikukulolani kuti mubwerere.
Kuwerenga Kofanana: Malangizo 9 Apamwamba Opangira Chikhulupiriro Pamaubwenzi
9. Mvetserani mnzanuyo
Zochita zolimbitsa chikhulupiriro kwa maanja muphatikizepo kukambirana zomwe muyenera kuchita mtsogolo, kuvomereza kuti mwasokonekera, ndikumvetsetsa zomwe wokondedwa wanu akunena. Zoyembekeza zawo zidzayang'anira momwe ndi zomwe mungachite kuti mukonze chiyanjano pambuyo pa chinyengo ndi kunama. Ngakhale mnzanuyo akungokuuzani momwe adapwetekera kuti munamunamizira, pongomvetsera ndi kuvomereza zolakwa zanu, mukhoza kuwapatsa chitsimikizo chomwe akufunikira.
Kusanyalanyaza nkhawa zawo kapena kusokoneza malingaliro awo okwiya, kuwawa kapena kupwetekedwa ndi gawo lofunikira la momwe mungayambirenso kudalirana mu ubale pambuyo pa bodza. "Kodi tikambirana kangati izi?" “Kodi mungaleke ndi kuona kuti ndikuyesetsadi kuti mundikhulupirire?” Muyenera kupewa mawu ngati amenewa kuti mupite patsogolo poyesa kuyambiranso kukhulupirirana muubwenzi mutanama.
10. Osayembekezera kalikonse
Kodi mungayambire bwanji kukhulupirirana muubwenzi mutanama? Kumbukirani kuti kuyesetsa kosalekeza, ngakhale kochepa bwanji, kumatha kuwonjezera zotsatira zazikulu koma simungathe kuthamangira izi. Ngati mwakhala mukugwira ntchito nokha, ngati mwakhala mukuchita zonse zomwe mungathe kuti mukhale bwenzi labwino kwambiri lomwe mungakhale ndipo mnzanuyo sananenepo kanthu za izo, kukhumudwa nazo sikungapindule kwambiri ndi ubale wanu. Ichi ndichifukwa chake kudzipereka kukonza ubalewu pasadakhale ndikofunikira.
Nonse mukadzipereka, muyenera kudumpha ndi mapazi onse awiri. Simungataye mtima komanso kulola mkwiyo kusokoneza maganizo anu ngati simunamvepo mawu oyamikira chifukwa cha khama limene mukuchita. Zochita zolimbikitsa anthu okwatirana kukhulupirirana sizitanthauza kuti azingosangalala nthawi yomweyo. Phunzirani kuyendetsa nokha ziyembekezo mu ubale njira yoyenera.
Kuwerenga Kofanana: Kodi Chithandizo cha Maanja Ndi Changati?
11. Funsani thandizo la akatswiri
Kaya ndi chithandizo cha mabanja kapena chithandizo chamunthu payekha, gwiritsani ntchito chilichonse chomwe mungafune kuti muchiritse. Katswiri adzatha kukuuzani momwe mungayambitsirenso chikhulupiliro mu ubale mutanama. Mutapatsidwa kusanthula kwanzeru chifukwa chomwe mumanama komanso zomwe mungachite kuti mulimbitse ubale wanu, sizikuwoneka ngati kukankhira mwala phiri.
Ngati zoyesayesa zanu pakadali pano sizinaphule kanthu ndipo mukufuna thandizo kuti muyambirenso kukhulupirirana ndi munthu amene munamukhumudwitsa, alangizi aluso komanso odziwa zambiri pa iye. Gulu la Bonobology zili pano chifukwa cha inu. Ndi chitsogozo chawo ndi chithandizo chawo, mutha kumvetsetsa bwino momwe mungachiritsire kudalirana kotheratu muubwenzi wanu.
Mafunso Ofunsidwa Kawirikawiri
1. Kodi kunama kumatenga nthawi yayitali bwanji kuti munthu ayambenso kukhulupirirana?
Nthawi yoti muyambirenso kukhulupirirana muubwenzi mutanama zimatengera nthawi yayitali kuti mnzanuyo amvenso otetezeka. Potsatira zomwe muyenera kuchita kuti mubwererenso kukukhulupirirani, mumathandizira kufulumizitsa ntchitoyi. Mukafunsira kwa akatswiri azachipatala, mutha kuchepetsa nthawiyo ndi ndalama zambiri. Ngati mukuyang'ana kuti mufunsane ndi dokotala kuti akuthandizeni kuyambiranso kudalira ubale wanu, Bonobology ili ndi zambiri. akatswiri odziwa zambiri kuti ndikuthandizeni kuchita zimenezo.
2. Kodi munthu angayambenso kukhulupirirana?
Inde, mungayambirenso kukhulupirirana muubwenzi wanu ngati mutachita zonse zoyenera. Yesetsani kukhala bwenzi labwino kwambiri lomwe mungakhale. Perekani nthawi ndi malo okondedwa anu kuti akukhululukireni ndikudzipereka kukhala munthu wabwino. Kupanganso kukhulupirirana, ngakhale kuli kovuta, sikungatheke ngati onse awiri ali odzipereka kuti ubalewo ukhale wolimba.
Zolozera Mfungulo
- Bodza limadzetsa kukhulupirirana mu maubwenzi, zomwe zingawononge ubale wa banja
- Kutalikirana, kusalankhulana bwino, kusungulumwa, ndi kusagwirizana ndi zina mwa zovuta zomwe zimachitika chifukwa cha kunama pachibwenzi.
- Kuyambira mabodza oyera mpaka mabodza osiyidwa, kukokomeza, mabodza azachuma, ndi kusakhulupirika, mabodza osiyanasiyana amakhudza ubale m'njira zosiyanasiyana.
- Kuti muyambitsenso chidaliro paubwenzi mutanama, muyenera kuyankha mlandu pa zomwe mwachita, kupepesa moona mtima, kuyesetsa kuti mutsimikizire mnzanuyo, kudzipereka kusintha.
- Ngati kuli kofunikira, funsani akatswiri kuti athe kuthana ndi mavuto omwe angakupangitseni kunama ndikuphunzira momwe mungalimbikitsire kuwonekera komanso kukhulupirika muubwenzi wanu.
Maganizo Final
Ngakhale kuti ntchito zomangitsiranso chikhulupiliro muubwenzi sizitha kupereka zotsatira pompopompo, muyenera kudzipereka kuti musinthe ubale wanu. Kumanganso kukhulupirirana sikukhala kuyenda mu paki, koma ndichifukwa choti simungafune kukhulupirira munthu yemwe ali ndi udindo wophwanya, sichoncho? Pogwiritsa ntchito njira zomwe talemba kuti muyambirenso kukhulupirirana muubwenzi, mukhala mukuyandikira sitepe imodzi tsiku lililonse kuti mutengenso chikhalidwe cha bwenzi lodalirika.
Ndizovuta Kupeza Chikhulupiriro cha Okondedwa Wanu Mutabera - Njira 12 Zochitira!
Zinthu 15 Zomwe Zimachitika Ngati Palibe Chikhulupiliro Mu Ubale
Zopereka zanu sizikupanga zachifundo Mphatso. Zilola kuti Bonobology ipitilize kukubweretserani zidziwitso zatsopano komanso zaposachedwa pakufuna kwathu kuthandiza aliyense padziko lapansi kuphunzira momwe angachitire chilichonse.
