Kuwotcha Ubale: Zomwe Zimayambitsa, Zizindikiro ndi Malangizo Opambana

Mukadzuka pabedi ndikumwetulira pankhope panu zikuwoneka zosatheka, mwachibadwa mudzayesa kupeza zolimbikitsa mwa mnzanuyo. Koma kungoganiza zongolankhula nawo kukuchititsani mantha ndi kutaya mtima, mungakhale mukutopa kwambiri paubwenzi.

Ayi, si liwu lina lodziwika bwino la munthu "akumva buluu". Kupanda kutero, kupsinjika kwa ubale kumatha kukhala chifukwa chachikulu chodetsa nkhawa, zomwe zimapangitsa kuti pakhale chisokonezo, kusowa chiyembekezo, nkhawa, kapena kusasangalala, pakati pa zizindikiro zina zambiri. 

Popeza kusiya izi osayang'aniridwa kuli ngati kusaina satifiketi ya imfa ya chibwenzi chanu, kuzizindikira ndikupeza choti muchite n'kofunika kwambiri. Mothandizidwa ndi katswiri wa zamaganizo Dr. Aman Bhonsle (Ph.D., PGDTA), yemwe ndi katswiri pa uphungu wa ubale ndi Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy, tiyeni tiwone chomwe chili komanso zomwe munthu angachite pothana ndi kutopa ndi chibwenzi.

Kodi “Kutha kwa Ubale” Kumatanthauza Chiyani?

Ndiye, kodi pali chinthu chonga ngati kutheratu paubwenzi, kapena mukungokumana ndi vuto? Mutha kukhulupirira kuti izi ndi zomaliza, koma popeza kuti "zigamba" sizikhala nthawi yayitali kuti mumve ngati mulibe chiyembekezo, mutha kungodutsamo zina zazikulu. 

Ayi, kumenyana kumodzi sikumasonyeza mkhalidwe wotero. Ndipo ayi, chifukwa chakuti mmodzi wa inu anapempha malo payekha sizikutanthauza kuti ubale watha. Mwachidule, kutopa ndikukhala wotopa nthawi zonse komanso kutopa chifukwa chokhala ndi nthawi yayitali yamavuto komanso kusapeza bwino.

Kutopa muubwenzi kumachitika pamene ubale wanu ukuyamba kutopa kwambiri , ndipo m'modzi kapena onse awiri angakhale ndi chiyembekezo chakuti zinthu sizingabwererenso m'mbuyo. Mungamve kuti thanzi lanu la maganizo likuvutika chifukwa chokhala muubwenziwu, zomwe kwenikweni zimayambitsa kutopa.

Pofotokoza tanthauzo la kutopa muubwenzi, Dr. Bhonsle akuti, "Ndi mkhalidwe wotopa, wophatikizidwa ndi kusowa chiyembekezo. Ndi kuzungulira koipa. Kutopa kumabweretsa kusowa chiyembekezo, komwe kumabweretsa kutopa kwambiri. Zimadyetsana mphamvu. Kutopa muubwenzi nthawi zambiri kumakhala kosangalatsa chifukwa kufufuza chomwe chimayambitsa kutopa kungapereke zifukwa zingapo.

"Pali zifukwa zambiri zomwe zingapangitse kuti chibwenzi chikhale chotopetsa m'malo mokusangalatsani, ndipo pali zifukwa zambiri zomwe zimayambitsa kuopsa kwaubwenzi. 

Monga momwe Dr. Bhonsle akunenera, chochitikachi chimakhala chokhazikika kwa munthu aliyense payekha komanso kusintha kulikonse. Zizindikiro zakutheratu paubwenzi wanu zimatha kusiyana kwambiri ndi za wina, ndipo kusazindikira kungakupangitseni kuti musamvetsetse chomwe vuto lenileni ndi. Ndicho chifukwa chake munthu ayenera kusamala ndi malingaliro abodza akutopeka paubwenzi.

Chenjerani ndi Kukhumudwa Kwambiri Kwa Ubale 

"Ngati mukuyenda mu nsapato zomwe zili ndi matope, mumatolera dothi lambiri m'njira." Ndiye ngati mukukakamizika kale, mutha kuganiza kuti mukutopa kapena kutheratu paubwenzi. Mwina simunakwezedwe, mwina banja lanu likukukakamizani kuchita zinazake, mwina mwadzigwetsa nokha m'mavuto.

“Chotero, musanafulumire kuganiza kuti “unansi wanga ukundiwotcha,” zindikirani kuti mkhalidwe wa maganizo anu ungakhale chifukwa cha zinthu zina zosaŵerengeka zimene zikuchitika m’moyo wanu.” Pamene mupeza kuti unansi wanu ndi chandamale chodetsa nkhaŵa, chimene mukuchita ndicho kungouzindikira molakwa,” akutero Dr. Bhonsle.

Kodi mumadziwa bwanji kuti mwatopa ndi chibwenzi chanu? Kudzudzula kuti simukusangalala ndi chibwenzi chanu sikungakhale lingaliro labwino, makamaka ngati zikutanthauza kuti mavuto akuluakulu sadzadziwika. Zizindikiro za kutopa ndi chibwenzi zimaonekera m'njira zosiyanasiyana komanso m'magawo asanu osiyanasiyana, ndichifukwa chake kudzizindikira nokha kungakhale kolakwika.

Kuwerenga Kofanana: Zinthu 7 Zoyenera Kuchita Mukasiya Chikondi ndi Mwamuna Wanu

Magawo A Kutha Kwa Ubale

Mofanana ndi matenda aliwonse, kupsa mtima kwa thupi kumapitirira pang’onopang’ono. Kutopa kwambiri muubwenzi kumadutsa magawo asanu. Ndipotu, kutopa kwamtundu uliwonse kumadutsa m'magawo asanuwa, kaya ndi malo ogwirira ntchito, kapena mbali ina iliyonse ya moyo. Ganizirani za kutopa kwatsopano paubwenzi ngati chizolowezi chotopa kwambiri. Kumvetsetsa magawowa kungathandize munthu kuzindikira zizindikiro zoyamba ndi zomwe zimayambitsa, ndikuchotsa vutolo mumphukira.

1. Gawo laukwati

Nthawi zonse timayandikira chinthu chatsopano ndi mphamvu zatsopano, kukhudzika, ndi kudzipereka. Timasangalalanso kwambiri. Ganizirani za ntchito yatsopano kapena ubale watsopano. Tikufuna kupereka zambiri ndikukhala ndi chisangalalo ngakhale ndi zobwezera zazing'ono.

Koma kupsinjika kwina kuyenera kuyembekezera ngakhale pakali pano. Kufuna kuyika phazi lanu patsogolo pa tsiku lanu latsopano, kukupatsani nthawi yochulukirapo kuposa momwe mungathere, nthawi zambiri kuzichotsa kuzinthu zina - izi ndi zitsanzo zochepa za zinthu zomwe zimapanikizika mu gawo laukwati. Kutopa kwatsopano paubwenzi kumatha kukhala kokulirapo ngati wina sapeza zovuta za ubale pamene ukukula.

2. Kuyamba kupanikizika

Ngakhale kuti kupsinjika maganizo kunali kutayamba kale mu gawo lomaliza, munthu yemwe anali naye pachibwenziyo sanawoneke kuti akuvutitsidwa nazo ndipo adazitenga mosavuta kuti alandire mphotho zokondweretsa. Koma chiyambi cha kupsinjika maganizo ndi chiyambi cha kuzindikira kuti pali ubale nkhawa.

Kutopa kwaubwenzi kumawonetsanso kusayambika kosawerengeka koma kowoneka bwino. Simutopa ndi wokondedwa wanu panthawiyi, koma nthawi zambiri mumamva kupsinjika kwaubwenzi.

3. Kupsinjika maganizo kosatha

Gawoli limadziwika ndi kupsinjika pafupipafupi. Kusiyana kwakukulu pakati pa siteji iyi ya kutopa kwaubwenzi ndi yomaliza kumangokhala kulimba komanso pafupipafupi. Munthawi imeneyi, kupsinjika kumamveka ngati kukhalapo kosalekeza m'moyo wanu. Mumamva kukhala osakondwa kwambiri ndi ubale wanu komanso tsogolo lake nthawi zambiri kuposa momwe munkachitira poyamba. Mochuluka kwambiri, moti mumatopa ndi mnzanuyo ndikukhala opanda chiyembekezo.

Kuwerenga Kofanana: Mukufuna Mwamuna Wosapezeka? Malangizo 10 Oti Mulumikizane Naye

4. Kupsa mtima

Gawo ili ndi pamene mutha kutcha kupsinjika kwanu "kupsinjika kwaubale". Zomwe zimachitika komanso kuchuluka kwa kupsinjika kumakhala kofanana kotero kuti mumamva kusakhazikika komanso kukana muubwenzi wanu. Kupsyinjika kumafika pamlingo wovuta kwambiri panthawiyi, ndipo zimakhala zovuta kwambiri kunyalanyaza malingaliro ndi zizindikiro zake. Mumaona kuti mulibe chidwi kwambiri muubwenzi, zomwe zimapangitsa kukhala kofunika kwambiri kudzikakamiza kuti mupeze chithandizo cha akatswiri.

5. Kutopa mwachizolowezi

Kutopa ndi chizolowezi kumadziwika ndi kusakhutira kwakukulu komanso kupsinjika maganizo kuchokera muubwenzi wanu mpaka kufika poti kwakhala kosazolowereka ndipo kuyenera kuonedwa ngati chizindikiro cha chenjezo la ubale womwe uli pamavuto. Pa nthawiyi, munthu sayenera kunyalanyaza kutopa ndi maganizo m'maubwenzi ndipo ayenera kuika patsogolo kuthana nako kuti apewe kuvutika maganizo kwambiri komanso nkhawa m'maubwenzi.

N'chiyani Chimayambitsa Kupsa Mtima kwa Ubwenzi? 

Tsopano popeza mwadziwa yankho lakuti, “Kodi pali chinthu chonga ngati kupsya mtima paubwenzi?”, kumvetsetsa tanthauzo la kupsya mtima kwa ubale, ndipo mwazoloŵerana ndi magawo osiyanasiyana a kutopa, mungakhale ndi chidwi chofuna kudziŵa chimene chingayambitse. Ngakhale zifukwa zimasiyana nthawi zonse, Dr. Bhonsle amathandizira kutchula zifukwa zingapo zomwe zimachititsa kuti zibwenzi zitope: 

1. Pamene simunali kufuna chibwenzi poyamba 

Ngati simunakhulupirire zamphamvu zanu kapena kudumphira mu izo chifukwa zimangowoneka ngati lingaliro labwino, mwina mwazindikira mwachangu kuti mwadziyika nokha pamavuto. Dr. Bhonsle anati: “Okwatirana ambiri achichepere amapsya mtima msanga chifukwa sanazindikire kuti sanakonzekere pangano loterolo pamene aloŵa m’chibwenzi.” Monga njira yodziŵira kapena kukulitsa khalidwe lodziŵika monga munthu wogonana, angaganize molakwa kufufuza monga kupembedza ndi chikondi,” akutero Dr.

Mukakhala mumkhalidwe umene simunafune kukhalamo, mungadzimve kukhala wotsekeredwa mwamsanga. Dzifunseni ngati kudzipereka ndi kumene munkafuna kapena ngati kutengeka mtima kunachititsa khungu maganizo anu.

Kuwerenga Kofanana: Mndandanda wa Zinthu 9 Zoti Muganizire Musanapereke Mwayi Wachiwiri Mu Ubwenzi

2. Kutopa kwambiri paubwenzi kungayambike mukasiya kuchita nokha

Ayi, wolakwa yekha si mnzanu kapena mavuto omwe mukukumana nawo. Dzifunseni, kodi mwayamba kusasamala ndi mtundu winawake wa inu nokha? Kodi kugwira ntchito pa umunthu wanu ndi chinthu chomwe munkachita ku koleji kokha? "Nthawi zambiri mumadziwa bwino zinthu pamene onse awiri asiya kugwira ntchito paokha. Anthu ambiri amagwidwa ndi matenda a kusakhutira muubwenzi wawo , makamaka atakwatirana."

“Akhoza kunenepa kwambiri, amasiya kulakalaka kuoneka bwino, kusiya kusamalira thanzi lawo la maganizo kapena lakuthupi.” Zomwe zimangofunika ndi mwezi umodzi kungodumphadumpha masewera olimbitsa thupi kuti ukhale chizoloŵezi.” Pamene muona mnzanuyo kukhala “chizoloŵezi” chimene mwachigonjetsa, ndiye kuti mwasiya kale kudzipanganso kuti mukhale bwino,” akutero Dr. Bhonsle. 

3. Kusintha kwa zikhulupiriro zanu kungakhale chifukwa chake 

Pamene inu mutu pa chidendene munthu, inu mwina simukuganiza za kumene mukhala mu zaka khumi zikubwerazi ndi iwo. Chabwino, mwina mumaganizira kale maulendo angapo opita ku Italiya limodzi nawo zaka zisanu, koma ndi mbali ya mfundoyo. Mwina mfundo zanu zasintha kuyambira pamene mudakhala limodzi, kapena zolinga zanu zamtsogolo sizinagwirizane poyamba.

Nchiyani chimayambitsa kutheratu kwa ubale? Malingaliro osiyanasiyana ndiwotsimikizika pachiwopsezo. Dr. Bhonsle anati: “Panthawi zonse, mumayendera mfundo zimene zimayenderana ndi zina zomwe sizikugwirizana nazo.” Koma mukafuna zinthu zosiyana kwambiri ndi moyo, mwina sakufuna ana kapena sakufuna kukwatiwa, zingachititse kuti ubwenzi wanu uthe.

4. Khothi la zinyalala zapoizoni lolembedwa kuti “ubwenzi wanu”

Popeza chifukwa chodziwika bwino cha kutopa ndi nthawi yayitali ya nkhawa kapena kusasangalala, ubale woopsa ndi chimodzi mwa zifukwa zazikulu zomwe zimayambitsa kutopa muubwenzi. Komabe, chofunika kwambiri kudziwa ndichakuti poizoni muubwenzi uliwonse amatha kusiyana. Zizindikiro zingapo za mphamvu ya poizoni zingapangitse kuti zikhale zovuta kuzizindikira, ndichifukwa chake kudziwa chomwe chikuyambitsa ndikofunikira kwambiri.

Kuwerenga Kofanana: Ubwino 9 Wotsimikizika wa Uphungu — Musavutike Mu Chete

5 Zizindikiro Zodziwika Za Kupsa Mtima Kwa Ubwenzi 

Ngati zina mwazoyambitsa zafika pafupi kwambiri ndi kwanu, ndizotheka kuti mukuda nkhawa ndi zomwe zingabwere mu equation yanu ndi mnzanuyo. Koma bwanji ngati zizindikiro za kupsinjika kwa ubale zikuwononga kale mphamvu zanu, osazindikira? Ndiye mumadziwa bwanji kuti mwatopa ndi ubale wanu?

Kodi zonse zomwe wokondedwa wanu akunena zimakupangitsani kuyang'ana maso mwachisawawa? Kodi mukuyembekezera ulendo wawo wamalonda wopita ku kontinenti ina kuposa momwe alili? Mwina, zomwe mukufuna mobisa ndikuthawa koma simukufuna kuvomereza. Tiyeni tiwone zizindikiro zodziwika za kuthedwa nzeru paubwenzi, kuti musadzipusitse kuganiza kuti mukungokumana ndi zovuta komanso kuti kumapeto kwa sabata muli limodzi kumakonza zonse:

1. Kusafuna kucheza ndi bwenzi

“Kukonda kukhala ndi munthu wina aliyense kupatulapo mnzako ndi chizindikiro choonekeratu chakuti chinachake chalakwika.” Mwina munaganizapo zokhala ndi chibwenzi, kapena mwadzidzidzi mwayamba kuyandikana kwambiri ndi munthu amene kale anali lawi lamoto,” anatero Dr. Bhonsle. 

Ngakhale kuti mwina mukuthawa dala kuvomereza izi, mwina mukupewa kale mafoni a mnzanu, poopa kuti mkangano ungayambe nthawi yomweyo mukayankha. Ngati mukumva kuti mwatsekeredwa muubwenzi wanu , tengani masiku angapo opumula ndikuwona momwe zingakukhudzireni. Ngati nthawi yonseyi yokhala nokha imakupangitsani kukhala osangalala kuposa momwe ubale wanu wasinthira posachedwapa, ikhoza kukhala chizindikiro chachikulu cha kutopa muubwenzi.

2. Mwaona zizindikiro za kutopa 

Dr. Bhonsle anati: “Mungakhale mukulephera kuchita bwino kwambiri, mukuda nkhaŵa za tsogolo lanu ndi ntchito yanu, mungadzimve kukhala wopanda chiyembekezo, wotsekeredwa m’mavuto, ndi kukhala wodzikayikira kwambiri. Zoonadi, chomwe chimayambitsa zizindikiro zonsezi chikhoza kukhala china osati ubale wanu, koma mwayi uli, mumadziwa kale ngati mnzanuyo akukupatsani chithandizo chomwe mukufuna kapena akuwonjezera thanzi lanu. 

3. Kuyesera "kulankhula" sikumagwira ntchito 

Ubale uliwonse, wathanzi kapena ayi, umakhala ndi mavuto. Koma kusiyana pakati pa kukhala ndi thanzi labwino ndi komwe kulibe ndi momwe mumagwirira ntchito pamavuto. Chenicheni chakuti okwatirana angakhale ndi makambitsirano opindulitsa ponena za nkhani zogwira mtima chingakhale chokwanira kuchirikiza icho. Komano, ngati kukhala pansi kukhala ndi mtima-ndi-mtima kokha kumabweretsa ndewu zambiri ndi oletsedwa chikhalidwe TV nkhani, kungakhale glaring ubale kutentha chizindikiro. 

4. Maganizo akumva ngati akufa

Inde, lingaliro lopitirira muyeso la "kuchepa" muubwenzi limasonyeza kuti pali vuto. Zizindikiro za kuchepa kwa kufooka zingaoneke zovuta kuzizindikira, makamaka ngati kusasamala kukukhudzani kwambiri. Zilibe kanthu ngati mwakhala m'banja kwa zaka khumi kapena muli pachibwenzi kwa chaka chimodzi, siziyenera kuwoneka ngati kupitiriza chibwenzi chanu ndi ntchito yotopetsa kuposa ntchito yosangalatsa.

Kuwerenga Kofanana: Kodi Kunyenga Kwamtsogolo N'chiyani? Zizindikiro Ndi Momwe Anthu Okonda Kudzikuza Amagwiritsira Ntchito Kunyenga Kwamtsogolo

5. Zolinga zamtsogolo sizikambidwa konse

Pamene chikumbumtima chanu chikukonzekera mobisa njira yopulumukira, mwina simukhala ndi zokambirana zabwino kwambiri za tsogolo. Nonse mungapewe kulankhula za izi, kapena kuyankha mosamveka mukafunsidwa za zolinga zanu zamtsogolo. Dzifunseni nokha ngati mungathe kudziwona nokha ndi wokondedwa wanu zaka 10 pansi pamzere. Ngati zimakupangitsani kukhala osamasuka kapena ngakhale kuda nkhawa pang'ono, muyenera kuwunikanso zinthu zingapo. 

Kuzindikira kuti zomwe muli nazo ndi mnzanuyo ndizosakhazikika kungakupangitseni mantha. Mwinamwake mwathera nthawi yochuluka mu izo, ndipo kusiya kupitako sikungakhale lingaliro lomwe mungasangalale nalo, ngakhale pamene malingaliro otopa amakupangitsani kukhala kovuta kuti mugwire ntchito. Koma ndicho chifukwa chake tapempha thandizo la Dr. Bhonsle kuti akuuzeni kuti ulendo wobwereranso wotopa kwambiri ndi umodzi womwe mungayambe nthawi yomweyo, ndi zomwe muyenera kuchita panjira. 

Malangizo 7 Othetsera Kupsa Mtima kwa Ubale 

Musanayang'ane malangizo oti musunge chibwenzi chanu, onetsetsani kuti mukufuna kuchita zimenezo poyamba. Kudziwa nthawi yoyenera kusudzulana kwamuyaya nthawi zambiri kumakhala nkhani yosiya kukana ndikuwerenga zomwe zalembedwa pakhoma zomwe zakhala zikukuyang'anani kwa nthawi yayitali tsopano.

Chomaliza chomwe mungafune ndikusunga ubale wanu popereka moyo wanu wamaganizidwe. Ndi zomwe zanenedwa, tiyeni tiwone momwe mungayambire paulendo wanu wobwereranso kupsinjika: 

1. Sonkhanitsani asilikali ndi kukambirana wina ndi mzake 

Kaya kuthedwa nzeru kwaubwenzi kwautali kapena kutopa chifukwa cha mikangano yosalekeza, chinthu chofunika kwambiri chimene mungachite ndicho kuwongolera kulankhulana kwanu. “Lankhulani ndi mnzanuyo za chimene chikuyambitsa kutopa.” Muyenera kupemphana wina ndi mnzake kuti akuthandizeni ndi kuthandizana pazochitika zosiyanasiyana zaubwenzi.

Dr. Bhonsle anati: “Pamene wavulaza phazi lako, ungakonde ngati wina wakuthandizani kuti mupite pampando.” Mofanana ndi zimenezi, muyenera kuthandiza mnzanuyo, ngakhale atavulazidwa kapena kusokonezeka maganizo ndipo mosiyana ndi zimenezi, inuyo mumafunika kumuthandiza.

Kuwerenga Kofanana: Mavuto Olankhulana Mu Ubale — Njira 11 Zogonjetsera

2. Uphungu ungathandize kuthana ndi kutopa kwaubwenzi

“Kulankhulana sikungatheke konse ngati mnzako wakwiya kapena kupwetekedwa mtima pamene mukufuna kukambirana.” Zikatero, ndi bwino kutero kudzera mwa mkhalapakati.Ndicho chifukwa chachikulu chimene uphungu waubwenzi ulipo.

“Mnzanu angakhale wofunitsitsa kukambirana ndipo angazindikire kuti zinthu zina zakhudza kwambiri ubale wanu kuposa momwe amaganizira,” akutero Dr. Bhonsle. Ngati mukufuna thandizo, nthawi zonse mutha kulumikizana ndi alangizi odziwa bwino ntchito omwe ali m'gulu la akatswiri a Bonobology , omwe angakonde kukuthandizani pamavuto anu aubwenzi.

3. Phunzirani chinenero chatsopano: chinenero chachikondi cha mnzanuyo

"Kufikira pamlingo winawake, kumvetsetsa mitundu isanu ya zilankhulo zachikondi kungakuthandizeni nonse kuchira ku kutopa chifukwa cha chibwenzi. Ndi chizolowezi chofunsa mnzanu kuti, "Mukufuna kuti ndizichita bwanji nanu?" kapena "Mukufuna kuti ndisinthe bwanji momwe ndiliri pafupi nanu?".

Dr. Bhonsle anati: “Zingathandize mnzanuyo kudziwa kuti zimene mukunenazo sizimangotanthauza zimene mukunena, koma mukutanthauza zimene mukunena.” Podziwa mmene amalankhulirana komanso kumvetsa mmene chikondi amachitira, mukhoza kuchita zinthu zimene zingawafotokozere bwinobwino mmene mukumvera,” anatero Dr. 

Ngakhale mutakhala ngati mukumva ngati kupsinjika kwa ubale wautali sikungatheke, mawu ochepa otsimikizira angakuthandizeni awiri. Dr. Bhonsle amatiuza kuti anthu ambiri salankhula komanso kufotokoza maganizo awo mmene mnzawo akumvera, zomwe zingachititse kuti anthu akhumudwe, asamagwirizane komanso azikula.

4. Phunzirani luso lothetsera mikangano

Monga momwe mungadziwire pofika pano, muli ndi maphunziro oti muchite ngati mukuyang'ana kuti muchiritse kupsinjika kwaubwenzi. Ngati mumayembekezera kuti zikhale zosavuta, mwina ndizoyembekeza zanu zomwe muyenera kuyang'anira (zomwe zingathandizenso ubale wanu, mwa njira). Mbali ina yomwe mungayeserepo kuti muchepetse kukhumudwa paubwenzi ndi kuphunzira luso lotha kuthetsa kusamvana.

" Kuthetsa mikangano kuyenera kukhala njira yofatsa kwambiri. Sizingakhale chitsanzo cha khothi, komwe mumalowa mwachangu ndikuukira mnzanu ndi mawu akuti "izi, izi, ndipo izi ndi zomwe mudalakwitsa ndipo izi ndi momwe mudachitira molakwika". Mukaukira wina m'dzina la kuthetsa mikangano, zitha kukulitsa mkangano. Muyenera kuphunzira kukhala aukadaulo, ogwirizana, muyenera kuyandikira kugwera mu mfundo yanu m'malo moyesa kuikakamiza kuti ilowe m'mkangano," akufotokoza Dr. Bhonsle.

5. Zindikirani zoyambitsa 

Kuti mupewe kupsa ndi moto, muyenera kudziwa kuti ndi nkhani ziti zimene zingapse m’ubwenzi wanu, zimene zingayambitse moto,” anafotokoza motero Dr.

"Pamene pali kutayikira kwa mafuta, muyenera kuwonetsetsa kuti musawonekere ndi ndodo ya machesi, sichoncho? Chifukwa chake muyenera kukhala tcheru kwambiri pazomwe mnzanuyo sakunena komanso akunena. Khalani wofufuza, osati wozenga mlandu paubwenzi wanu. M'malo modumphadumpha ndikuzindikira zomwe zidachitika komanso chilango choyenera, yesani kumvetsetsa zonse zomwe zikuchitika pazochitika zinazake.

“Nthawi zina zomwe muyenera kuchita ndikusiya zinthu zikuyenda ndipo palibe chothetsa.” Mwina mnzanuyo amangokhalira misala chifukwa anaimbira foni ola limodzi lapitalo, kapena wina m’banjamo anadwala mwadzidzidzi,” akuwonjezera motero.

Kuwerenga Kofanana: Mfundo 9 Zamaganizo Zokhudza Kunyenga — Kuchotsa Nthano

6. Gwirani ntchito nokha

Monga momwe Dr. Bhonsle adanenera, kutopa muubwenzi kungachitike chifukwa chakuti okwatiranawo asankha kusadzipanganso okha ndikuyamba kusasamala. Mukasiya kuyesa kukhala bwenzi labwino kwambiri , mumatsala pang'ono kuvomereza nthawi yopuma.

Kuti mupewe kupsinjika kwa ubale muzochitika zilizonse, kudzigwira nokha kungapangitse kusiyana konse. Ayi, sitikutanthauza kuti muyenera kutenga chinenero chatsopano miyezi sikisi iliyonse ndi kuphunzira luso latsopano atatu aliwonse. Kungopanga chokonda chatsopano kungakhale kwabwino mokwanira. 

7. Gwirizanani kuti mugwire ntchito pa ubale 

Kugwira ntchito paubwenzi sikutanthauza kuti muyenera kuchotsa zomangira zanu zachikasu, ndikulemba kusanthula kwatsatanetsatane kwa sabata yanu. Zitha kukhala zophweka ngati kuchita yoga limodzi, kukhala ndi nthawi yabwino limodzi, ndikuwonetsetsa kuti mawu anu sakukwezedwa pakakangana.

Pamene onse awiri asankha kulumpha ndi mapazi onse awiri, kupsya mtima kungathetsedwe moyenerera. Zachidziwikire, kalasi imodzi yophikira sikungathetse mavuto anu onse, koma mutha kukhala limodzi ndikupeza chakudya chabwino.

Kotero, kodi pali chinthu chonga ngati kutheratu paubwenzi? Mukubetchera. Kodi zimawononga ubale wanu? Osati kwenikweni. Zoonadi, ulendo wopita ku kuchira ndi wautali, ndipo ungafunikenso kudzifufuza mozama. Koma mkhalidwe wopanda chiyembekezo ndi wogonjetsedwa wamalingaliro siwokhazikika. Kupeza njira yotulukira m’dzenje limeneli kungapulumutsedi moyo wanu. 

Ibibazo

Njira 12 Zothetsera Ubale Wosokonekera

Kukonza Ubale Wapoizoni - Njira 21 Zochiritsira PAMODZI

Njira 21 Zothetsera Ubale MWINAWONONGA

Chopereka chanu sichikutanthauza chopereka chachifundo . Chidzalola Bonobology kupitiliza kukubweretserani chidziwitso chatsopano komanso chaposachedwa poyesetsa kuthandiza aliyense padziko lonse lapansi kuphunzira momwe angachitire chilichonse.