The phrase ‘need some space’ did not appear in media, literature until the ‘60’s, 70’s and decades later, it has finally caught up with us. Healthy relationships are built on mutual trust and compatibility where the term space is usually denoted as a negative connotation. We all know of couples who excused themselves under the context of needing some space and eventually broke up. That’s not always the case. Giving space in relationships is not always ominous.
Is space in relationships good?
Relationships are tricky. It starts with the sunshine days of hand holding and spooning, where the couple is almost a single body, soul and mind. Great as it is, this “honeymoon phase” does not last forever. The real perks of relationships start perking up.
“You’re wearing that again?”, “Why can’t you go out to eat?”, “You breathe so loud”. The fairy tale days come to an end, marking the real struggles of a relationship.
The constant nagging, bickering, complaining about always having to see each other’s face – are all signs that crop up in every relationship at some point. Taking some time off and getting some space for oneself not only lightens the mind, but results in a healthy relationship.
Here are 5 reasons why space in a relationship is very important
- Emotional space is a must
- Make it very clear to your partner what you mean by space
- You should know how to react when your partner asks for space
- Make the most positive use of the space
- There is nothing wrong in taking a break it makes the love stronger
1. Emotional and physical space in a relationship is good
It lets you find your independence and find yourself. Individuality once lost can be found again. Hang out with your friends and family, enjoy dinners that you never eat, watch a movie by yourself. Doing things that makes you happy will make you a happier person and have a happier relationship. If you get caught up in the nostalgia of the good times, remember the reason you needed to take the time off. If you are feeling emotionally empty in the middle of taking a break, talking to someone you trust might help. It is easy to give up, but keep the relationship in mind and work harder. Having this kind of space in relationships of any sort, from time to time is a positive thing for the growth of both the parties.
2. Explain to your partner what you mean
While asking for space in a relationship, it is important to let your partner know what you mean. You love your partner and do not want them to lose their mind over this.
Request them NOT to take the space in relationship personally. Explain what’s troubling you or the relationship and how some alone time will do you both good in the long run.
3. Deal with the space in the relationship well
Asking for space in a relationship must seem daunting to the one asking for it. You might even feel cut off from your SO the moment they agree to it. But it is important to look at the bigger picture. Connect with yourself, know what you are looking for and when you find the satisfaction, let the positivity help you better your relationship. The space in the relationship literally allows you to breathe the fresh air, read a few classics, broaden your horizon and feel free.
4. How to act when your partner asks for some space in the relationship
Giving your partner space when they ask for it can be stressful. There are bouts of insecurity, feelings and thoughts you don’t want to have.
Don’t act on them. Feel the things, but do not act rashly.
Talk to someone close to have a healthy outlet for your thoughts. Remember: your SO is doing some soul searching, your acting up will hinder their process.
Limit texting or calling if the ground rules have been set. This not only lets your partner find themselves, but teaches you to live on your own.
Be encouraging to yourself and your partner. Research says socializing, engaging in activities might help with distracting from contacting your partner.
Do not let your neediness hinder your partner’s growth.
Know that giving your partner space will better your relationship.
5. It is okay to take a break
Often, people put a pause on the relationships and take a break. Much like Rachel and Ross (their break ended terribly) what does ‘taking a break’ mean in a relationship? Are you allowed to see other people while on the break? There should be some mutually agreed ground rules that are to be followed.
All in all, space in a relationship is needed when you and your partner get into petty arguments all the time. Instead of calling the whole relationship off, taking a break, or needing some time is a good way to nurture the relationship. Need of a break in a relationship, need of some space in relationships is undervalued aspect, but if followed well, can result in the building of a healthy relationship.