8 Amathiphu Ochwepheshe Okusinda Enhlekeleleni Yomshado

Ingabe unomuzwa wokuthi umshado wakho usengozini? Cishe leyo yindlela elula yokuqonda lokho okuhlanganisa inkinga yomshado. Nakuba, “engozini” kubonakala kuyincazelo engacacile, indlela esizizwa ngayo nemizwa ngokuvamile iyisiqondiso esingcono kakhulu sokulinganisa impilo yobudlelwano bethu nokukhomba ingozi ezayo.

Inkinga yomshado noma ukucindezeleka komshado yinoma isiphi isithiyo emshadweni, kubabhangqwana, okubonakala kunzima kakhulu ukusinqoba. Ubunjalo bawo buhluka kakhulu emshadweni kuye emshadweni, kanjalo nezimbangela nezisombululo zawo.

Ukuze sikubambe kangcono ukuthi yiziphi izimbangela ezivame kakhulu zezinkinga zomshado, saxoxa nodokotela wezengqondo Pragati Sureka (I-MA ku-Clinical Psychology, amakhredithi ochwepheshe avela e-Harvard Medical School), ogxile ekusingatheni izindaba ezinjengokulawula intukuthelo, izinkinga zokukhulisa izingane, nomshado ohlukumezayo nongenalo uthando ngokusebenzisa izinsiza zomzwelo.

Waphinde wasikhomba endleleni yezimpawu ezicacile ezingasitshela ukuthi lokhu esikubonayo kuwumshado osenkingeni ngempela, futhi wasinika izeluleko zochwepheshe zokuthi singasinda kanjani enkingeni yomshado.

Iyini Inkinga Yomshado?

Umshado ungaba esinye sezici ezibaluleke kakhulu ezithonya ukuphila komuntu, isikhathi sakhe samanje nekusasa lakhe. Ukuzibophezela emshadweni kungenza ngisho noma kuphule umuntu. Ngokungenakugwenywa, izithiyo noma ukucindezeleka okubangelwa umshado kunethonya elikhulu ekuphileni kwawo wonke umkhaya. Lokhu kwenza inkinga yomshado ibe isenzakalo okungafanele sithathwe kalula noma singanakwa.

Kodwa iyini inkinga yomshado phela? I-Pragati uyachaza, “Lapho sikhuluma ngomshado osenkingeni, ngokuyisisekelo uyisiteji sobuhlobo lapho lowo muzwa wokuhlobana, obaluleke kangaka ebudlelwaneni obuphumelelayo, uba sengozini.”

Wonke umuntu, okunoma yiluphi uhlobo lobambiswano, ubhekene nezinselelo. Kodwa inkinga yisigaba esibucayi se-a inselele yobudlelwano. Ziningi izinhlobo zezinkinga emshadweni. Kungenzeka ukuthi ubunzima buqoqwe futhi buhlanganiswe isikhathi esengeziwe, kangangokuthi bukhulu kakhulu ukuba bunqobe manje. Noma, umbhangqwana ubhekene nenselele engazelelwe, enkulu ngendlela yokuhlukumezeka okungakaze kubonwe ngaphambili. Isibonelo, ukushona kwengane, noma ukudalulwa kwemfihlo edlule, noma ukuhluleka kwezimali.

Esimweni esinjalo, umbhangqwana uzama ukunqoba le nselele. Uma impilo ephelele yobudlelwano nabantu abahililekile ivuma, umbhangqwana uyaphumelela ekuzulazuleni inselele. Kungase futhi kuncike ezingeni lomonakalo owenziwe noma ukuhlukumezeka okuhlangatshezwane nakho. Ngisho nobudlelwano obuphumelela kakhulu nobunempilo bungase bubhekane nenselele elingana nentaba engenakunqotshwa, okubangela ukuba ubuhlobo buwohloke ngaphansi kwesisindo sayo.

Kepha kuzo zombili izimo, lokho umbhangqwana obhekana nakho kuyisimo sokukhungatheka lapho bekuthola kungenakwenzeka ukubhekana nenkinga. Umbhangqwana obhekene nezinkinga zomshado ungase ucindezeleke kakhulu, ukhathazeke futhi uphelelwe ithemba. Ukuxhumana kuzwakala kuphazamisekile. Imiphumela yakho ingase iqale ukubonakala emizweni nasekuziphatheni okungekona nje kombhangqwana kodwa namanye amalungu omndeni, ikakhulukazi izingane.

Yiziphi Izimbangela Zezinkinga Zomshado?

Lapho ekhuluma ngezimbangela zezinkinga zomshado, uPragati ukhuluma nomsuka wenkinga. Ucaphuna u-Esther Perel, isazi sokusebenza kwengqondo esidumile nomeluleki, okhulume ngesizathu sokuthi imishado yesimanje ihlupheka kangaka. Uthi, “Lokhu kwenzeka ngoba silindele ukuba umuntu oyedwa anakekele lokho idolobhana lonke elalikunakekele.” Ulindele ukuthi oshade naye abe umngane wakho, agcwalise nesidingo senu sothando. ubudlelwane be-platonic nezothando kulindeleke kumuntu ofanayo. Nilindele futhi ukuthi nobabili nijabulele imisebenzi efanayo. Ngasikhathi sinye, isistimu yakho yenani nayo iyingxenye yengxubevange. ”

UPragati uyanezela, "Abanye ochwepheshe bezobudlelwano banikeza ezinye izizathu, njengamahora amaningi okusebenza noma izinto eziza kuqala ngokungafanele. Okubalulekile - njengokuyekethisa." Udonsela ukunaka kwethu ekubalulekeni kwegama elithi 'ukuvumelana'. Uthi, “Abanye abantu abasiqapheli isidingo sokuyekethisa bethi kulungile uma singazwani, siphila kanye kuphela.Uma ukhule nengane yakini, noma uhlala nabazali bakho, kufanele ngaso sonke isikhathi ulungise.

Uphinde asole ukuvela nokusabalala kwezinkundla zokuxhumana kanye nokugcwala kolwazi ngakho. Ekhomba izehlakalo zemishado yosaziwayo, uthi, “Okwenzekayo ukuthi abantu bathonywe impilo yomculo noma izinkundla zokuxhumana. Abantu balindele isilinganiso esiphezulu sothando, ngezinye izikhathi esingenzeki kubantu abavamile. Kungaba ngenxa yesimo sengqondo, noma izimali, noma ukungafani phakathi ibhalansi yempilo yomsebenzi. Kodwa wonke umuntu ulindele ukunxenxwa kanjalo, ngalelo zinga ledrama noma abalandeli bempilo kanye nezindlela zokuphila ezinkulu.”

Izimpawu Ezi-5 Zokuthi Umshado Wakho Ubhekene Nezinkinga

Kodwa ubona kanjani ukuthi lokhu obhekene nakho kuyaphuthuma noma kubi ngokwanele ukuthi kubizwe ngenhlekelele. Ingabe inkinga yomshado iwumuzwa? Uma kunjalo, kunjani-ke lapho umshado usenkingeni? UPragati uthi, “Uqala ukuzizwa sengathi niqhelelene kakhulu, noma nizizwa ningaqondwa kahle ngaso sonke isikhathi. Kungenzeka nisegunjini elilodwa, kungenzeka nilale ndawonye, ​​kodwa lide kakhulu, futhi akukho okungenziwa ngakho. Kafushane nje, ukuxhumana kuyalahleka.”

UPragati uthatha inkomba evela kuJohn Gottman, isazi sokusebenza kwengqondo saseMelika, kanye nethiyori yakhe yabagibeli bamahhashi abane bobudlelwano. Njengabamahhashi Abane Be-Apocalypse ababonisa ukuphela kwesikhathi, u-Gottman wenze inkolelo yokuthi Abagibeli Bamahhashi Abane noma ukuziphatha okune okubonisa ukuphela kobudlelwane. I-Pragati ibona lokhu kuziphatha okune njengezinkomba eziphelele zomshado osenkingeni, futhi inikeza uphawu olwengeziwe ekugcineni.

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1. Ukugxekwa

"Ukugxeka njalo omunye umuntu, izingubo zakhe, izinwele zakhe, imikhuba yakhe nendlela abaziphatha ngayo, amakhono abo anjengokupheka, noma imali abayenzayo, kuwubufakazi obucacile bokuthi usesimweni esibomvu senhlekelele.” Kuwukuhlasela ukuthi ungubani noma umuzwa wobumina womunye umuntu.

Kubalulekile ukuqaphela ukuthi ukugxeka nokukhononda amagama amabili ahlukene. Ukuzwakalisa ukukhathazeka noma izikhalazo, uma kwenziwa ngempumelelo, kuwukuziphatha okwakhayo. Izikhalo zimayelana nezindaba okumele zibhekwe. Kodwa ukugxeka uma kwenziwa njalo, kuzwakala njengokuhlasela komuntu siqu okuhloswe kuye.

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2. Ukudelela

Ukugxeka njalo kulandelwa ukudelela. Kuyiphethini engenzeka. Lapho isilinganiso sokugxekwa siphakama ngokwanele, umuntu obonisa indelelo useshintshela ekubeni mnene nokungahloniphi.

Sihambisana nalokhu kuziphatha okunobuthi ngokusebenzisa ukubhuqa, ukubhuqa, ukubhuqa, nokubonisa indelelo. “Uma uzithola ukhuluma ngendelelo nesithandwa sakho, zibheke, ngoba lokho kubeka umshado esimeni esibucayi, noma kuwuphawu lwezinkinga zomshado,” kusho uPragati.

3. Ukuzivikela

Ukuzivikela kuyimpendulo engokwemvelo yokuzizwa uhlaselwa. Uma wena noma umlingani wakho nizithola nihlezi nizivikela, maningi amathuba okuthi lowo muntu uzizwa ehlaselwa. Kodwa impendulo evikelayo lapho ebhekene nokukhathazeka okuvumelekile akusizi ngalutho ngaphandle kokusola uzakwethu ku i-passive-aggressive imfashini. U-Pragati uthi, "Uma uzivikela, okufunayo nje ukuthethelela iqiniso lakho."

Lokhu kusebenza njengesivimbo esiteshini sokuxhumana futhi kuwuphawu olucacile lokuthi umshado usenkingeni. Ngakolunye uhlangothi, ebudlelwaneni obunempilo, impendulo yomuntu esikhalazweni noma ekukhathazekeni komlingani wakhe iwukwazisa imizwa yakhe nokwamukela isibopho.

4. Ukukhanda ngamatshe

I-Stonewalling yisigaba sokugcina salolu chungechunge lwezindlela zokuziphatha ezibulalayo zobudlelwano. Kwenzeka njengempendulo kukho konke lokhu okungenhla. Kulesi sigaba sobudlelwano, egcwele ukuziphatha okungalungile kanye namaphethini okuxhumana, umuntu uvele ahoxise futhi anqabe ukuphendula. Lokhu kubizwa nge-stonewalling

UPragati unikeza isibonelo. “Umlingani wakho usho okuthile bese wena ufana nentshe, uzitshela ukuthi, ‘Lo muntu akakaze enze umqondo. Ngeke kube khona inkomba ecacile yokuthi ngaphandle kokuxhumana, akukho ukuphuma esimeni esibucayi. Ukushaywa ngamatshe ngokomzwelo iwuhlelo lwakudala lokuthi 'okungamelwe ukwenze' lapho umshado wakho usenkingeni.

5. Ukuhlukumeza

Uhlu “lwezimpawu zenkinga ebudlelwaneni” aluphelele ngokudabukisayo ngaphandle kokuhlukumeza. Ezomzimba, imizwa, ucansi, ukuhlukunyezwa ngamazwi. Ubudlelwano obuhlukumezayo bunobuthi futhi kufanele buphele.

Uma wena noma umlingani wakho nihlukunyezwa ngomunye, kuyinkomba ecacile yokuthi ubudlelwano benu busenkingeni enkulu. Ukuhlukumeza kuyiphethini futhi kuvame ukuziphinda. Ukuzimisela kanye namandla okuphindaphinda ukulimaza omunye umuntu kuwukubhidliza okucacile kwesisekelo sobudlelwano, futhi kufanele kuthathwe ngokungathi sína.

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8 Amathiphu Ochwepheshe Okusinda Enhlekeleleni Yomshado

Kungenzeka ukuhlehlisa inkinga yomshado ngokufunda indlela yokusingatha izinkinga zomshado. Ukuthi kungaba nzima noma kulula kangakanani kuncike ezintweni ezimbalwa. Ngaphambi kwesigameko esinqumayo esidale inkinga (noma ngaphambi kochungechunge lwezehlakalo ezincane eziholele enkingeni enkulu), ibinjani impilo yobudlelwano bakho nesibopho sakho nomlingani wakho? Bungakanani ubunzima bale nkinga? Uhlonyiswe kangakanani ngamaphethini alungile okuxhumana? Uvuleleke kangakanani ukuthi ufunde, ushintshe, futhi uthuthuke?

U-Pragati unikeza iseluleko sakhe ngezinto ezingu-8 ezingakusiza ufunde ukuphatha izinkinga zomshado.

1. Funa usizo ngokwelashwa

Isimo senkinga yomshado yisigaba sokugcina ngaphambi komshado noma wakho ubudlelwano obuphelile ihlakazeka ngokuphelele. Kungakho into yokuqala ayincomayo uPragati wukwelashwa ngomelaphi womndeni omuhle, uma ungakwazi ukufinyelela futhi ukumkhokhela. Ugcizelela ukuthi ukwelulekwa ngezinkinga zomshado kufanele kuvele kumuntu ongakusiza futhi ukuthi uqonde ukuthi wazifunda kuphi izindlela zakho zokuxhumana.

Ukhuluma ngenye inzuzo ebalulekile yokwelapha. "Ohlotsheni lwethu lwesiko lokuxhuma, lapho sithonywa khona okulindelwe umphakathi, ukwelashwa kukusiza ukuthi ucace ngalokho okufunayo."

Umelaphi anganikeza umbono odingeka kakhulu esimweni senhlekelele yomshado. Ukwesekwa okunenjongo kanye nesistimu eqondisayo izokusiza ukuthi ubheke izindaba ezikhona ngokucacile, futhi ikuqondise ezisombululweni ezingokoqobo. Uma ubhekene nenkinga yomshado noma isigaba sokucindezeleka emshadweni wakho, i-Bonobology's iphaneli yabanekhono and ochwepheshe abanolwazi akhona ukukusiza.

2. Bheka amaphethini akho asencane

Sonke sithatha izindlela zethu zokuziphatha kusukela ebuntwaneni bethu. Kungakhathaliseki ubude bomshado - inkinga yomshado yeminyaka engu-7, noma engu-20, noma inhlekelele yomshado wangaphambi kwesikhathi - izimpande zingalandelelwa emuva emaphethini omuntu asencane kanye nezitayela zokunamathela.

Ngokuvamile, ukusebenza kulezi zinto, ukusebenza nochwepheshe kunconywa ukuthi ukwazi ukulawula imizwelo evelayo. Noma i-introspect kanye nejenali mayelana nemizwa eba khona lapho uhlangabezana nezingxabano ebudlelwaneni bakho. Lokhu kungakusiza ukuthi ubone amaphethini akho okucabanga angenalutho.

3. Lawula izinkinga zentukuthelo

I-Pragati incoma kakhulu ukuphatha izinkinga zentukuthelo uma unazo. "Uma unezinkinga zokucasuka kumele uzilungise, akukona ukuthi zicushwe ngubani. Uma umuntu oyedwa eziphethe emshadweni usuke ewuthuthukisa umshado ngo-50%.

Ukuze ukwazi ukusebenza ngempumelelo kuwe kanye nezinkinga zakho zentukuthelo, ungazama okuhlukahlukene amasu okulawula intukuthelo njengokuzivocavoca ukuphefumula okujulile, ukuzikhulumela okulungile, nokuzindla. Ukukhuluma ngemizwa yakho nomngane omethembayo kungenye indlela ephumelelayo yokulawula intukuthelo. Izincwadi zokuzisiza nezifundo eziku-inthanethi ezihloselwe ukulawula intukuthelo - mahhala futhi zikhokhelwa - zimbalwa kweziningi izinsiza zokufunda ezingakusiza. Ukwengeza, umuntu angase acabangele ukubonisana nomelaphi ukuze athole umsuka wezinkinga zentukuthelo futhi azilawule.

4. Gwema umdlalo wokusola

Uma kufanele sikutshele ukuthi ungakwenzi yini uma umshado wakho usenkingeni, kungaba lokhu. Ungagxili kumdlalo wokusola. Kunalokho, thatha umthwalo wemfanelo. UPragati uthi, “Uma kufanele ngeqe umgwaqo noma ngishayele imoto, omunye umuntu angase agxume ukukhanya, kodwa yimina okufanele ngiqaphele, ngoba ngisesihlalweni somshayeli.”

Ukuzibophezela akusho ukuthi kufanele uzinikele ekucindezelweni, noma uvumele amaphutha ongawenzanga, noma ubeke phansi uhlelo lwakho lwenani. Kusho ukulawula ingxenye yakho yesivumelwano. Ukuze uthole amaphutha owenzile. Ukubheka ngaphakathi, futhi usebenzele ekuthuthukiseni ukushiyeka kwakho. Kungaba inkinga yomshado ngemva kweminyaka engu-7 noma inkinga yomshado osemncane, ukusola ukushintsha izokufaka esimweni esifanayo esinegethivu. Kuphela ngomthwalo wemfanelo osebenzayo lapho abantu ababili bangakwazi ukusebenza ekuqondeni kwesixazululo.

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5. Thembeka kuwe ngokwakho

UPragati utusa umuntu ukuba athembeke kuye ngokwakhe futhi abuze, “Ngineqiniso kangakanani emshadweni wami?”, “Yini engiyitholayo emshadweni?”, “Yini engingayekethisa ngayo?”, nokuthi “Yiziphi engingaxoxisi ngazo?” Uzodinga ukwethembeka nobuqotho kuwe ngokwakho kuzo zonke izigaba zenqubo ukuze ulungise indlela yakho yokuphuma ebunzimeni.

UPragati unikeza isibonelo esifanele. “Mhlawumbe uthola ukuthi inkolelo ethile yomlingani wakho injalo ngaphandle kwesistimu yakho yenani . Kodwa ungase usafuna ukuba sebudlelwaneni ngenxa yokuthi kunezingane ezihilelekile, noma kudingekile ngokwezimali kuwe. Kuzomele uzibuze ukuthi umshado ubhekelani. Kulapho kuphela lapho ungaqala khona ukuphatha imizwa yakho kangcono.

"Uzothatha isinqumo sokuthi lezi yizinto engingahlala nazo, lezi yizinto okungaxoxiswana ngazo. Esigabeni esilandelayo, uzocabanga ngezinto eziyishumi ongeke ukwazi ukuphila nazo, futhi iyiphi into eyodwa ongasebenzela phezu kwayo. Kuphakathi kokuthi ungafuna ukusebenza ngakho, noma uzoyeka." Isibonelo, esimweni sokuhlukumeza, ungase unqume ukuthi angikwazi ukuyekethisa ngokuhlukumeza futhi ngingakhetha ukuphila ngokwehlukana okuphethwe noma isehlukaniso.

Kodwa kukho konke lokhu, kuzomele uqale uthembeke kuwena. Ukwethembeka kuzokusiza ukuthi unqume imingcele yakho futhi uphishekele inkambo yesenzo esilungele wena.

6. Gxila enkingeni

Lapho izinkinga zanda noma zanda ngokuhamba kwesikhathi, kuba nzima ukugxila kuzo ngendlela ecacile. Eqinisweni, okwenzekayo ukuthi sikuthola kulula ukuhlehlisa inkinga futhi siqale ukuyibona njengephelele. Kancane kancane, ukunaka kuyasuka kuleyo ngxubevange yezinkinga engaqondakali bese kudlulela kumuntu oyedwa esiqala ukumbona njengomsuka wezinkinga zethu.

I-Pragati icela abantu ukuthi baqale ukugxila enkingeni ngaphandle kokuyinamathisela kuyo noma ukuyenza ibe ngeyakho ngokuziphatha komunye umuntu. Uthi, “Inkinga ingase ibe ukulutheka, noma okungafinyelelwanga okulindelwe, noma a umndeni ongasebenzi kahle iphethini. Uma ugxila enkingeni, kungakusiza ukuthi ubheke ukuthi umlingani wakho uvelaphi noma ukuthi iyini isistimu yakhe yokubaluleka. Kungase kukusize usebenzela ukuthola isisombululo.”

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7. Gxila ekukhuleni kwakho kwengqondo-ngokomoya

I-Pragati igcizelela ukubaluleka kokugxila ekukhuleni komuntu ngokwengqondo nangokomoya. “Ungafunda ukuzisebenzela, uzinikele emandleni aphezulu, uyabona ukuthi kukhona amandla amakhulu kunawe angakusiza ukuba uphume ekungalawuleni empilweni yakho.

"Abantu abaningi bacabanga ukuthi umthandazo uyithuluzi lokuxoxisana. Kodwa kuye kwaba nocwaningo oluningi lwesayensi mayelana nezifundo eziqondile zengqondo kanye nokucabangela. Uma uzinikela emandleni aphezulu, wakha amandla akho okuqina."

Ukuphila ngendlela enenjongo futhi ngokuqaphela kungaletha izimanga ezinkingeni zomshado ngoba, ngemva kwakho konke, inkinga yomshado iyinhlekelele yabantu ababili. Ekubiza ngokuthi ukushintsha indlela yokuphila, uPragati uthi, “Nsuku zonke umkhuba wokucabanga isebenza ngokukusiza ukuba ugxilise ingqondo yakho, okuyiso lesiphepho esiyinhlekelele yomshado.”

Ngaphezu kwalokho, ukugxila ekukhuleni kwakho ngokomoya kungase kukunikeze nomuzwa womuntu siqu wenjongo. Kuzosiza ukubeka umthombo wakho wenjabulo kokuthile okulawulayo wena. “Lapho unomuzwa wenjongo nokwaneliseka, awuswele kangako ebudlelwaneni,” kusho uPragati.

8. Ungalahlekelwa umbono

Umuntu kufanele aphile ngokuqwashisa, ikakhulukazi phakathi nezinkinga zomshado. Uma ubheka impilo yakho, njengomlingiswa oyinhloko wendaba yakho, kuba lula kakhulu ukuthi umuntu alahlekelwe umbono. Sinomkhuba wokudlala kancane noma ukudlala ngokweqile izinto emzamweni ongazi wengqondo yethu wokuzivikela. Lokhu kusho ukuthi sobabili senza ihaba ngezindaba ezilawulekayo, futhi siziba izinkinga eziyinhlekelele.

Ukungaboni izinto ngendlela efanele futhi kusho ukuthi siqala ukulindela ukuthuthuka okukhulu ngomzamo omncane, futhi sizizwe sikhungathekile izinsuku ezimbalwa zokuthatha izinyathelo ezisebenzayo. Kufanele sibe nombono kuzo zonke izigaba zalolu hambo ukuze sikwazi ukugubha ukunqoba okuncane, sibone intuthuko, futhi simbambathe umhlane.

Yenza konke okusemandleni akho ukuze uthole umbono wenkinga obhekene nayo. Uma ukwazi, bheka ukwesekwa okuhlosiwe okukusiza ukuthi ubone izinto njengoba zinjalo.

Imibuzo Evame Ukubuzwa

Imicabango Final

Ukusebenzelana kwethu no-Pragati kugcine ngenothi elihle mayelana ne-John Gottman's Magic Ratio ka-5:1. Uyasitshela, "UGottman wayethe, ukuze umshado uzinze, konke ukuhlangana okungalungile kufanele kuqedwe okungenani ngokuhlangana okuhle okuhlanu." Ukwenza izinto zicace, ukuthethisa umlingani wakho noma ukunganaki ukwenza okuthile akucele ukuba ukwenze kuwukusebenzisana okungekuhle. Ukwazisa umlingani wakho, ekhombisa uthando, noma ukwenza okuthile okujabulisayo nabo, kuwukusebenzelana okuhle.

Ekugcineni, uyanezela, “Ukunakekela kuzo zonke izinkathi zonyaka nazo zonke izinhlobo zothando kufanele kube iphuzu langempela lomshado.” Bhekisisa impilo yakho nophathina wakho, ubone ukuthi kungakanani ukusebenzisana okuhle nokubi oke waba nakho naye. Uma konke sekushiwo futhi kwenziwa, zama ukuphatha, ukugcina, nokuthuthukisa leso silinganiso somlingo esingu-5:1.

11 Izibonelo Zemikhuba Yokuzilimaza Emosha Ubudlelwano

Izindlela Ezi-11 Ezithandekayo Zokuqomisana Nomlingani Wakho - Spice Up Umshado Wakho

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Umnikelo wakho awuhlanganisi inhlangano esiza abantulayo umnikelo. Izovumela i-Bonobology ukuthi iqhubeke nokukulethela ulwazi olusha nolwakamuva emzamweni wethu wokusiza noma ubani emhlabeni ukuthi afunde ukwenza noma yini.

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