Sex and Passion

Why do women fake orgasms?

Why do women fake orgasms? The reasons are varied, as an eminent sexologist reveals
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With inputs from Dr Paras Shah

Why would anyone fake an orgasm?

Sex without an orgasm is like an ice-cream cone without the ice cream, monsoon without rain, a petticoat without the nada, a printer without ink and a national holiday that falls on a Sunday. It’s frustrating! So why would anyone fake it?

Pop culture? Hollywood films? Women’s magazines? Something out there has got many thinking of and associating faking of orgasms with some kind of manipulative sex sirens who exist out there to trap men. The truth is far from it. Dr Paras Shah, who has years of experience in sexual medicine, solves the mystery. He says about 50% of women have at some point faked orgasms. And what he shares is mostly heart-breaking.

Related reading: 5 reasons why every man must ‘help’ his woman to an orgasm

paras shah newDr Paras Shah is the Chief Sexologist, Gujarat Research and Medical Institute and Director, Sannidhya Institute and Research Center for Sex, Sexuality and Health.

Here’s why women fake orgasms

These are some of the reasons why women fake orgasms.

Fear

Some women have dominating partners with short tempers and insensitivity to their needs. Someone who has wrapped his masculinity around his genitals. If he comes to know that now this one woman is not able to climax, he will yell at her and accuse her too. “Everybody gets off with my moves, why can’t you? You’re frigid.” She’ll fake the orgasm and let his ego bloat further to save herself from abuse, both verbal and physical.

women orgasms
Representative Image source

If she is wise, she’ll cut him out of her life ASAP and not just because of his poor sexual performance. But… stats say that most women who fake orgasms in such situations do it out of fear that if they don’t, the man may leave them!

Poor at sex but determined partner

Her partner is one of those who makes it his goal to get his woman to climax, but he isn’t that good at it. He is not going to stop till she finishes. So after he has been going on to no result, faking it is the only way she can make him stop.

Man versus woman

As clichéd as it sounds, ‘women give sex to get love and men give love to get sex’. So if a woman doesn’t climax, she may let it go the one odd time. She already has a loving man and that matters the most in the world to her. Also, she may be protecting his feelings and lets him believe that he did a good job. Her priority is love and she doesn’t care about the rest.

Related reading: Here’s how men and women approach sex differently

Save the occasion

How can she let a beautiful occasion be spoilt? Everything was going so well. The ambience was great. Parents took the child out to visit relatives. The foreplay was divine. Everything was steamy and better than the movies. But her orgasm has decided to take the day off. She doesn’t want to ruin the day. The clock is ticking, the family will be back soon. It just feels like the best thing to her to fake it so as to not ruin the occasion.

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Psych the mind

This is interesting. Pretending to have an orgasm to induce a real one. This can work well, but unfortunately can backfire too. One might end up faking all the way to the end and that’s no fun. Proceed with caution!

Weak communication

All the above can be attributed to poor communication or weak relationships. If the relationship is mature and has developed to a comfortable place, if she is not afraid of her man and her man’s ego is not wrapped around his sexual prowess, the woman will definitely be comfortable enough to be honest with him.

Sexual intimacy is a valuable and intimate part of a couple relationship. It should never be considered as a performance appraisal!

Sexual intimacy is a valuable and intimate part of a couple relationship. It should never be considered as a performance appraisal!

Beautiful sex can be a result of only a mature relationship where both partners can have clear, open and frank communication with each other.

The printer should always have ink and the petticoat must always have the nada. There are many things average in this world; love shouldn’t be one of them and nor should sex.

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Top reasons why all women, whether married or not, must masturbate

Why it is important to make your woman happy in bed

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2 Comments

  1. See guys, remember that reaching climax takes more time for women. Make an effort to be honest with her if you feel like she’s not satisfied. Talking about sex and what she likes in bed can make the experience better for the both of you. And I feel if the woman is really comfortable and honest with the man in bed, the chances are less for a fake orgasm.

    And sex actually comes as secondary when you both love each other a lot and share a good connection!

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