Infidelity can creep into your relationship for a variety of reasons. It could start because of boredom and then further exacerbate because of a lack of fulfillment, the thrill of sexual exploration and so on. But lots of other unique and individual experiences also contribute to why do women cheat, and even men for that matter.
If your wife or girlfriend has been showing suspicious behavior where she acts evasive, hides her phone records and has become too busy to make time for you, we understand where your skepticism is coming from. But as a woman, I’ll tell you there are a lot of twists and turns for understanding why do women cheat.
Why Do Women Cheat? 6 Possible Reasons
Women as creatures are intuitive. When things don’t work out, she knows it coming well in advance. Moreover, the mundane life of a neglected wife can indeed be lethal. It is possible that a spouse dehumanizes their wife so often that the only solace may come in the form of an extramarital affair.
Women are sometimes subjected to these common feelings which could possibly be the reason they look for freedom and love outside of their relationships. Sometimes women feel like they are only a prize to be won and kept in the trophy cabinet for display. This is a common feeling among most married women.
Tessa once said, “I’m tired of my husband treating me like some sort of accomplishment and then tossing me aside, without any disregard for my feelings. After the marriage, he does not even care to ask how I’m doing, let alone love me”
A woman also does not want to feel like just a house-keeper who is there to take care of the house, keep the cooked food coming, earn some extra bucks and pleasure the husband at night. Just like the men, it is important to cherish her and do things for her. If she feels emotionally abandoned, she will indeed search for something more genuine. Here are 6 reasons why women cheat in a marriage or a relationship.
Related Reading: 12 Tips On How To Ignore A Cheating Husband – Psychologist Tells Us
How many times do men put down their phones and other gadgets, make eye contact, and talk to you about your day in particular? How many times do they notice a particular effort you took in re-arranging his desk or his study?
A feeling of being neglected, not cherished and cared for may lead a woman to another man or even a woman. A relationship takes love, effort and reinforcement. Just because you are now committed to them, does not mean that you ignore their needs and focus your attention on another thing. So men, put those phones down and listen to your wife about what she has to say.
2. Can’t forget her past
The reasons for married women cheating are plenty. But one major problem can arise when your wife is still in love with someone from her past. This will not only lead to a dysfunctional marriage and relationship arguments, but will also invite infidelity.
Even though she is someone’s wife and is trying to move on, she could still harbor feelings for her past lover. Though that affair didn’t lead to marriage, she kind of starts leaning backwards again, if she gets disillusioned with her marriage. We know this is terribly unfair to you as a husband but one can consider relationship counseling in such a case to deal with a problem as complex as this one.
3. Boredom of the drill
Wake up, clean potties of the kids, cook breakfast, get the house cleaned, get to work, shop for groceries, come back, cook dinner, and then crash until the drill repeats itself. How many women get trapped in the usual and get bored to death?
Why do women have affairs? Sometimes, it’s not about falling in love with someone else or trying to hurt one’s husband. A woman might stray from her path because of simply feeling trapped in a monotonous routine. The same old sights, smells and conversations over and over again can make her feel exhausted and yearn for some kind of excitement.
Related Reading: The secret behind how extra marital affairs start and how they end
4. Emotional distance
Sometimes men forget to invest in a wife because married life brings it’s own struggles and difficulties. Why do women cheat does not always have to do with a woman’s personal history or problem but can also be because of the state of the marriage. In married life, the romance sometimes declines and while that is completely natural, one should make the conscious effort to rekindle love.
During the dating phase, love is at an all time high and one feels this emotional electricity with the one the love. But once the battle is won, the emotional connected might start dying down. If you do not talk about your day with each other anymore or barely make any eye contact when getting ready for work in the morning, it is possible that you two are becoming emotionally distant from one another.
5. Libido mismatch
Women want good sex too! Why is it presumed that men are more interested or entitled to this kind of thing? It is an age old assumption that women are less assertive about their sexual needs and it is only men that get to be promiscuous and honest about it.
This kind of assumption in a marriage can lead a woman to look for good sex elsewhere. Do women cheat more than men? Well that is a tough conclusion to make if she is more sexually frustrated in a marriage and not achieving the big O, she might want to jump over the fence of her marriage and try something new.
Related Reading: 6 reasons people give for having affairs
6. To be seen
Do all women cheat? Absolutely not. But women who feel like they are not appreciated or valued enough, certainly could. When a woman is in love with her husband, she makes the effort to show it to him. Greeting him with lunch at work, writing him a note in the morning, sending flirty texts throughout the day or covering his chores for him, are just some of the things that happy women do in a marriage.
But women are happy to do these things as long as they know they have a spouse who is grateful for the same. If they feel like they are not seen or their husband dismisses their love and efforts, a woman might find it easy to give up on completely and find someone that actually cherishes her.
Still wondering why do women cheat? Well hopefully, you know a little bit more about it now. A general dissatisfaction, sexual frustrations or feeling undervalued are some reasons that she could be looking for love elsewhere. If you think your wife is cheating on you, feel free to reach out to Bonobology’s panel of counselors to help your marriage.
Sometimes, it’s not actually about hurting the one they love. They just feel dissatisfied in the relationship and need something bigger to make them feel alive again. This does not always mean that they don’t love you. But that relationship in that moment might just not be enough for them.
If she is terribly busy and does not tell you why or she is often on her phone smiling at texts, it could indicate there is a new and more interesting person in her life. Some other signs include lying to you or if she stops having sex with you completely.