Only Child Syndrome (OCS) is a new coinage for the behaviour and attitude of an only child. They are part of the society and we can’t side-line or repudiate them for their birth alone. There are many advantages of having single child, and many benefits of dating one.
When you marry an only child, there are some ways in which you can handle your marriage better. They have learnt to be independent having grown up without any peers to be compared to in the house. But nothing in life comes without a price…
Pros and Cons Of Being An Only Child
Being an only child comes with its own set of quirks and requirements. However, it is a fulfilling experience and a learning for your future relationships.
So, here are some pros and cons of the only child in a family being your spouse.
Related Reading: My wife is an only child and I think she is spoilt
What is not true about only children
1. Do not call them spoiled, because they are sure to have many good qualities apart from what you are pigeonholing them for. Just because they grew up without any siblings, doesn’t mean their parents spoilt and pampered them with too much attention.
2. “Oh! That explains it!” Do not use this sentence when you come across an only child. Do not judge them with your misconceptions. They also gain different traits from the environment they live, and the raising methods their parents used. So it’s not always their parents who are responsible.
3. Don’t assume that they are selfish, because contrary to popular belief, single children are giving, as they want to be accepted by others and therefore end up as people pleasers.
4. Many people assume that only children grow up lonely and clingy. This is definitely not true because the are self-taught on how to be more disciplined and content with their own company.
These things are true for an only child
1. One of the benefits of being an only child is the confidence they radiate, without insecurities and do not have the need to stand out, as they always had attention on them. They’re mature people, because they have grown up with adults rather than siblings.
2. They like to have their ‘me’ time. Do not consider that as their selfishness, as they are used to being alone most of the time. This is how life has been for them. So for a partner to accept you into their personal space may not be very easy.
3. Living with a need for co-dependency is not a necessity for them, because ther are very independent people; therefore, their decisions may come out as strong and grounded. For their parents, having only one child was a conscious decision taken to raise them they way they did.
4. They are not zero tolerant people. In fact they are more mature and they are clear about their deal breakers. They are able to identify toxic relationships and keep away from them.
5. Since they have always fended for themselves when their parents weren’t around, they have a knack for getting things done on time. They are very punctual, and know how to get things done well before the deadline.
Related Reading: What To Expect When You’re Dating An Only Child
Remember this when dealing with an only child
1. Do not drive home the point to them that since they were raised as an only child, life has been easier for them than it has been for you. When their parents realise they are pampered, they also put their foot down on strictness.
2. They aren’t loners/introverts or antisocial despite having lived without siblings. Only children make great friends and enjoy camaraderie. They do not like their personal space to be intruded and hence they also do not invade others’ space.
3. Having lived without siblings, they have been self-reliant. Therefore they are used to sorting out their own problems, so they like to be left alone while dealing with problems.
4. They can be very particular about their routine. If they are workaholics, it is hard to get them to give you attention, but if they are lazy and couch potatoes, good luck getting them to do anything.
5. They are too used to things being done their way. Because they didn’t have many sibling fights growing up, they are not too great with adjusting in a newer environment.
Related Reading: 10 Family Values That Help You Forever In Life
Living with only-child adults just takes some understanding on the part of the spouse and things will be better with mutual adjustments. Although there are some disadvantages of having single child, you can work your way around these minor things in a relationship.
Being an only child, your partner can show you a fresh perspective on things you are so used to seeing. Their concepts of sharing, living, and cooking are very different from the people who grew up with siblings. Since they are so mature, they can teach you a more organized and efficient way of living.
Most of the times, no. Children who are raised without any siblings find company elsewhere and are masters of spending time with themselves.
Maturity, intelligence, discipline, and sometimes a little bit of an OCD problem.
There is no one to look out for you and have your back. They grow up fending things for themselves and don’t have a partner-in-crime to confide in.