(As told to Irewati Nag)
I gambled all I had for my girlfriend
Sometimes life throws situations at us which, if we accept, we know are going to make a fool of us. Despite all this, we go ahead, hoping that we won’t be fooled. I’ve lived this life. I had all the warning signs. I jumped into an affair which had no basis, was continuously made felt unwanted and unimportant, only required for moral and financial support and nothing else. Now I feel as if I was just a necessary distraction in an otherwise non-eventful marriage of my girlfriend who belonged to a different nationality.
She seemed successful and independent
I worked over a decade as a successful engineer in Malaysia. I met Chen at a business conference in Kuala Lumpur. We soon started talking and I realised she was quite successful for her age, an independent woman managing her two kids with some help from her aunt, while her husband lived in her home country in some town which I can’t spell, like a typical Indian. She had been in KL for over 7 years and had risen on the corporate ladder very soon and had reached the senior management level pretty early on. She made me believe that it was because of her hard work, but now I feel otherwise.
The man I loved had fooled two women before me, and yet I became the third
My lover cannot commit to me as he can’t leave his wife. He won’t let me go either