Words and language seem to have been used very loosely in today’s generation, in this world of Millennials. This internet age and ‘everything on Social Media’ has also made petty and not-so-worthy things the centre of our lives. Obsession is one of them, and mind you, signs of obsession often come disguised as love, care and affection.
When you are obsessed with someone, everyone but you can see it.
What Causes Obsession With A Person?
First, let us know what is obsession.
Something that, one would feel every once in a while with their mood swings, loneliness and/or introverted behaviour. Something that one can’t stop thinking about, pausing everything else that is going on in his/her life.
This, sadly, doesn’t seem to hold true, these days. At times, love is equated with obsession and vice-versa. Obsession is not something that one feels once in a while, but is a persistent feeling within for someone or something nowadays. Your world revolves around that one person only who you feel is your ‘knight-in-shining armour’ or your ‘lady with the glass shoes’. It starts with having a crush, where you believe in magic, unicorns and miracles; eventually bursting your bubble with the reality that holds true.
Related reading: She became obsessed and wouldn’t take no for an answer
What Are The Signs Of Being Obsessed With Someone?
Not that – magic, unicorns and miracles don’t exist. Maybe they do in some fantasy land or a parallel universe! But, that discussion is for some other day. Right now, let’s take a look at 13 warning signs that tells you that either you are obsessed with someone, or someone is obsessed with you. Ah, don’t be happy just yet, if you think someone might be obsessed with you – it isn’t all rosy as you think.
In order to know more about your crush – you check out his/her Facebook, Instagram, Twitter and oh, so many other Social Media apps. You might even talk about him/her to your mutual friends, but once you know enough and you continue doing this – YES, YOU ARE OBSESSING OVER HIM/HER.
Related reading: 12 Signs That You Are Dating A Stalker And Need To Breakup
2. Your friends are his/hers
Before an introductory session, the stalking has led to him/her knowing about your friends and your significant other has befriended them on their Social Media handles. Sign enough of being obsessed with someone?
3. Friends of the opposite gender disliked
This is one of the major symptoms of being obsessed with someone. It starts off with a very awwwww feeling, but then it ends up suffocating you with your significant others’ insecurities and ‘making a mole out of a mountain’. This causes obsession with a person.
4. Your happiness becomes their priority
Every small thing is evaluated in detail and learnt as to whether it was for your happiness or otherwise. And, if not, mending things and focusing on your happiness becomes primary vocation. Never would you have thought that this would be a sign of obsessing with someone.
Related reading 10 Bollywood films that glorify stalking
5. Didn’t keep posted about your whereabouts
You either missed out on informing about where you were going at what time or it was an immediate plan and your phone died and you couldn’t do anything about it. This would turn into a major fight and it would take some to and fro phone-calls and more.
6. Constant validation and reassurance needed
They would need to hear “I love you” more often than you would have thought and all their discussions would lead to how very important they are for you and your life.
7. Dislikes your plans with your friends
They would want to be included in the plans that you are making with whoever – be it an old school friend, a bunch of office colleagues or just catching up with an acquaintance. They’d feel left out, if your such plans materialise and they are left behind to do their own thing.
Related reading: 13 signs you are the selfish one in your relationship
8. Surprises you at your get-togethers
Due to the feeling that they go through as mentioned in the above point, they would have a need to barge in on your plans, in the name of ‘surprising you’. It would put you in a very awkward situation when hanging out with your group of people.
9. Always in touch (24/7)
They wouldn’t leave you one bit and would want to chat/talk with you constantly. It’s as easy as whenever you look at your phone, it would either be pinging with their messages or you would be notified with a missed call, when you just stepped outside for some fresh air.
10. You must reply instantly
In this tech world, they’d constantly be keeping a check on when you are online and if, you are and if you don’t reply to them immediately it ticks them off. Whatever the explanation be – receiving documents from your boss, messaging your colleague how you think the coffee at work sucks or looking for music to lighten up the mood at work, they won’t understand.
Related reading: This is why possessiveness in any form is bad for a relationship
11. Exclusivity as soon as you are together
It wouldn’t even be any time, that you have been together, so you could announce it to your friends or so and they would demand exclusivity out of you. Which you would have wanted to give as things progressed, but a move so soon, might get you thinking, if being in a relationship with this person, is in fact a good idea or not after all.
12. Don’t get upset, when they should
If, you did something that is a big ‘no-no’ in a relationship and your significant other doesn’t get upset with you, then he/she is definitely obsessed with you. Missing out on a family dinner or not turning up for that movie that you were planning for weeks, just to be a couched potato at home are definitely upsetting matters and they overlook these.
13. Always ready for last minute plans
If, you are the one who is obsessed, then last-minute plans are always agreed upon with a positive nod and a wide smile on your face. This can be sometimes used against you. Based on your partner’s free time or availability, plans are made with the understanding that you won’t ever deny.
If, you can relate to any or all the above mentioned points, bring your A game on now. Make sure that you have a keen eye on moves and control the obsession by:
- Trying to keep your insecurities at bay: Let them not crawl in, as that might result in ruining what you have going on right now with your significant other
- See through your person: If he/she comes across as the obsessive kinds and pushes you to plan outings with his/her friends rather than always planning it with you
- Returning texts immediately is not a necessity: If, a busy schedule doesn’t allow you or him/her to return calls or reply to texts immediately, don’t ponder over it and do that the first thing as soon as you get a chance
- One can’t always be living in the ‘Honeymoon Phase’: So make sure that you don’t end up choosing him/her always over your friends and other commitments. Always is the emphasised word here
- Introspect and learn: You might be avoiding your personal insecurities with the recent obsession – either your crush or the significant other
These are just a few that might help you overcome your obsession or make you aware about someone obsessing over you. Stay tuned to read 11 ways you could stop obsessing over someone.