We have been made to believe that sex alone is the most intimate thing in a relationship. What if we tell you there are other, non-sexual ways that will make you feel more intimate and closer to your partner than a hot shower make-out episode? In fact, these are some ways that can help blossom your feelings for each other into seasoned, mature love. All you need are the right non-sexual intimacy ideas up your sleeve.
It is great to have amazing sex in all its dirty glory and shining pride. While sex is unarguably an important part of a relationship, it most certainly isn’t the be-all-and-end-all of a romantic connection. Sex can sustain your connection in those initial days of a relationship, but the feeling of ‘I can’t take my hands off you’ fades with time. Through the ups and downs of life, you need other things to carry your relationship forward, and sex can only be one of them.
The ability to foster intimacy without sex is the bedrock of a lasting and successful relationship. That does not mean you should not invest your time in having good, passionate, amazing sex with each other. It just means that emphasis should also be placed on other ways to get intimate in your relationship.
Sex cannot see you through when your honeymoon period gets over, and it cannot always be as hot and amazing as was in the initial days. And that is why being adept at ways to show affection without being sexually active is to keep your relationship thriving, healthy, and full of life and happiness.
13 Ways to Show Affection Without Being Sexually Active
Marshal and Joyce had a heady run in the sack during the initial days of their relationship. Sex was on the table whenever they met, and it seemed as if their appetite for it was insatiable. Then, as their feelings for each other grew stronger and the relationship found a rhythm, the passionate streak lost its edge. That’s when they found themselves wondering, “Are there ways to be intimate without sex?
Sure enough, after giving it some thought, talking to friends and reading up about non-sexual turn-ons, they were able to find ways to connect with each other on a deeper level. Like Marshal and Joyce, you too may find yourself at a juncture where intimacy becomes a lot more than just about sex.
While it is great to have amazing, passionate sex, you can build your relationship stronger and better by indulging in the below non-sexual touches often. They won’t lead to orgasms, but will definitely make you feel a lot closer. To get started, here are 13 non-sexual intimacy ideas you can explore:
Related reading: 20 easy ways to be romantic
1. The hand-in-hand stroll
Have you noticed how movies focus on holding hands and walking down a deserted lane with flowers and trees lining the sides and an ocean breeze gently grazing the heroine’s hair? While that may not be possible for us all, we can still take a short stroll holding and caressing each other’s hands and feeling good about it.
A leisurely walk, when you hold hands or wrap arms or simply rest your head on his shoulders, can leave a beautiful lasting feeling. It is, undoubtedly, one of the most beautiful ways to show affection without being sexually active.
2. A kiss on the forehead
There is no better way to cultivate intimacy without sex than with affectionate physical touches and gestures. Among these too, a kiss on the forehead is a league apart.
While a lot is often talked about hot kisses, a kiss on the forehead is enough to make your partner feel happy and good in a second. Lean in to gently touch your partner’s forehead with your lips, or rise up touching your partner’s neck to plant a gentle kiss. Your partner will close his or her eyes and bask at the moment, while you feel good to see their lit-up faces.
3. Playing under the table
A relationship without sex being the sole focus should be mistaken for a sexless relationship. You can still desire each other and feel your heart skip a beat by just being in your partner’s vicinity or seeing them after a long day. The question is, how do you express these feelings when not having sex?
How about some playful touches under the table while you are having a quiet dinner? Just take off your shoes and play footsie softly. No sexual connotation, just playful, soft touches without any other gesture. Don’t linger on it for too long; just a couple of caresses and let go. This is one of the non-sexual turn-ons that will make you feel sensual and romantic.
4. Stroking the hair
Stroking your partner’s hair is a great way to show you care and helps in bonding, which makes it one of the sought-after ways. Everyone likes to feel loved and cared for, and ruffling your fingers through your partner’s thick mane will do just that. Stroking the hair is considered to be relaxing and de-stressing. It is a great way to let your partner know you love him. When you cuddle up, just run your fingers over your partner’s head in a playful way.
5. Hug your partner often, for no reason
Hugs have the power to heal, de-stress and boost the mood. Hugs are nurturing in nature, and give the other person a feeling of warmth, welcome, and security. One of the non-sexual intimacy ideas you must put into practice, no matter what relationship stage you’re at, is to cuddle up when your partner returns from work, or when he is feeling particularly stressed.
Hug your partner often when there are tough times you guys are going through – it will make your partner feel that you are in this together. You actually don’t need a reason to hug your partner – when you get up, while you get about your business for the day, when you see each other, anything happy, anything sad – you can hug so many times!
Related Reading: 8 Types Of Intimacy In A Relationship
6. A pat while walking by
Now, this is not like a spank on the butt, but a gentle pat on the back as you cross each other in the hallway, or when you go to get a glass of water from the kitchen if she is doing the veggies – unaware of your presence. A gentle tap, a sudden rub – it will instantly boost your partner’s mood and fill you with a happy feeling.
No matter how intimate the sex is, it is these gestures outside those lust-driven moments that cement your relationship. That’s why this seemingly insignificant gesture is among the habits couples in healthy relationships swear by.
7. Tickle them to laughs
Well, it may get annoying at times but tickling each other for sheer fun is a great way to get to touch each other and let some giggles and laughs follow. Tickling your partner can instantly lighten his or her mood and bring out a series of laughs that often ends with a deep hug and a small peck.
Plus, it makes you feel happy for hours afterward. You may even end up having a pillow fight (how cute is that!) and playful wrestling on the bed after the tickling. These playful moments are a great way to bond when you’re not having sex.
8. Pull them close when they are asleep
Not when your partner is in deep slumber, but when you lay down to sleep, pull your partner toward yourself gently or push your body closer to his. Just let your bodies touch each other without getting sexually intimate. Touch your partner’s face with your fingers, hug him or her tight and rest your legs on each other.
Wrap the day with a lovely goodnight message, as you find solace in each other’s arms. This is one of the heart-warming ways to show affection without being sexually active.
9. A short massage before you sleep
Ever wondered if it’s possible to feel like you’re having sex without touching each other sexually? If yes, then this is one of the must-try non-sexual intimacy ideas for you. Just before you hit the sack and call it a day, offer your partner a massage. Take your partner’s feet in your lap and gently massage them with your fingers.
It does not have to be a pressure massage, just a few gentle circular motions to kick out exhaustion and make him or her feel wanted and loved. Or just give a short back massage or a shoulder rub whenever you feel like it. Your partner will feel relaxed, loved and thankful to you. No matter how tired your partner is or how bad his or her day was, this small act of love will definitely wash all his fatigue away.
Related reading: 5 habits that enhance the couple relationship experience manifold
10. Just a little kiss
Have you wondered why you don’t kiss your partner anymore and if you do, it is generally an act of foreplay? Kissing is a wonderful way of connecting with each other, even if it’s a small peck on the lips. Yeah, not talking about playing tongues here, but more casual, lovable and totally adorable – a simple kiss.
You will feel good about the kiss, your partner will feel happy, and you can do this often without any reason whatsoever. This is among the non-sexual turn-ons that will leave you feeling warm and fuzzy long after the moment has passed.
11. Gaze into their eyes
If you have been dating for a long time, you would have done this for sure. Young, new couples often sit and gaze into each other’s eyes and play the blinking game. Whoever blinks first, loses the game. Not that we are telling you to keep score, but gazing into each other’s eyes will give you both an escape from all that is happening around you – even if it is for a few seconds. You will feel like you have been missing out on this connection forever, and it will give your relationship a new dimension altogether.
12. Holding hands
Just like that. While walking. While watching TV. While talking to each other. Just about anytime, anywhere. Hold each other’s hands snugly and remind yourself how well they fit into each other. Truly made to match! Ways to be intimate without sex cannot get more wholesome than this.
13. Watching TV with head rested on his shoulders
Another classic way to feel close to your partner, and make him feel loved. While watching your favorite movie or TV show, casually in your pajamas, just hold on to his arms and rest your head on his shoulders or chest. You may even feel like taking a nap, as comfort and warmth build around you. The scent of his body will mingle with your senses and you may inch in a bit closer. Cute. It is a beautiful way to bond.
Once you start bonding with each other physically and build intimacy without sex, you will notice a new wave of happiness and contentment ruling the air. We hope these non-sexual touches keep your relationship happy forever. Share with us anything else you’d like to see added to the list of non-sexual intimacy ideas!