You have landed on this page because you are in a position where you say, “My girlfriend is ignoring me”. Your relationship is on the edge now. Your girlfriend, who would first get excited to see you, is now finding reasons to ignore you as if you are some stranger stalking her.
She gets angry and frustrated easily and you feel that she is just finding reasons to stay away from you. She keeps pulling away and you don’t know what’s wrong. I’m sure there are many doubts plaguing your mind. If only the answer was short and simple. Let’s talk about the possible reasons your girlfriend is ignoring you, and what you can do in this situation.
Why Is My Girlfriend Ignoring Me All Of A Sudden?
There’s a question that can baffle the best of minds. Or so you think. Things can get pretty confusing when your girlfriend ignores you, but finding the reason behind her cold shoulder might give you the clarity you need. The possible reasons are quite straightforward in nature. So let’s find out why you girlfriend ignores you for days…
1. She’s got a lot on her plate
You need not take all things personally. Maybe your girl’s a busy-bee and simply caught up with work. Your relationship has taken a backseat because of her hectic schedule. A reader from Omaha confirmed this when he wrote, “She was constantly on the phone and that sort of weirded me out. I (wrongly) thought my girlfriend ignores me and talks to other guys instead. But a conversation cleared things up nicely. It was just a barrage of work problems.” Dating a workaholic ain’t a piece of cake!
2. Things have gotten boring
When your girlfriend ignores you, it might be a case of boredom in the relationship. Things get stale after a while when the honeymoon phase wears off. Both partners stop putting in efforts to sustain the romance. This could be the reason behind her mood. She might not even be ignoring you per se; perhaps she’s sick of the drear routine you both have fallen into. Quite understandable. Time to reignite things in the love department? I think so.
Related Reading: 6 Steps To Take If You Are Feeling Trapped In A Relationship
3. You’re the culprit
If you haven’t been a good boyfriend lately, then this is the obvious reason behind her cold vibes. Were you insensitive to her needs? Did you forget something important to her? Have you said something hurtful during an argument? Or did you dismiss her emotionally? Any one of these arguments can spell doom for your couple dynamics. Looks like you have some introspection to do.
4. She needs some me-time
I don’t understand why my girlfriend ignores me, you say. Have you considered the possibility that she needs some space in the relationship? A relationship can be quite demanding and many a times, people just aren’t in the right space to give what it takes. Your girlfriend probably needs to be by herself and recalibrate things. A little time with her thoughts is what she’s going for; as a side-effect, you’re thinking, “Why is my gf ignoring me for no good reason?”
5. The relationship is coming to an end
This possibility might seem extreme, but you should consider it nevertheless. This is one of the signs your partner is losing interest in the relationship. There could be a number of factors behind this; she’s found someone better, you both have grown apart, there’s no intimacy between you two, etc. She’s stopped putting in the efforts because she sees the impending end clearly. Maybe she’s waiting for the right time to break the news to you.
Now you know what could be causing the problem in you love-life. But let’s take the next step forward and answer a very important question: What to do when my girlfriend is ignoring me after many years of dating?
8 Things To Do If Your Girlfriend Is Ignoring You
Probably all was well and good a few days or weeks ago. Then perhaps she suddenly started ignoring you and you are battling mixed feelings. “My girlfriend has been ignoring me for days”, “Why is my girlfriend ignoring me all of a sudden?” If these are the thoughts that you are having right now, we have the answers. Here are 8 things to do if your girlfriend is ignoring you.
1. When your girlfriend ignores you for days…Give her some space
You think, “My girlfriend is ignoring me for no reason”, and you believe that your girlfriend might be having second thoughts about your relationship while it might just be work pressure. Her frustration shows that something is bothering her and she doesn’t want you to be a part of that right now. You have to draw the line between love and privacy in a relationship.
Give her some space and let her figure out her thoughts. It will give her time to clear her mind. If she doesn’t want you to be around her, don’t be. Your presence might have a negative impact on her mind and will make her pull away even more. Once she has figured things out, she will come back to you to talk and open up about it.
To ensure that you don’t spend your time obsessing over why she needs space, you must keep yourself productively engaged. Use this time to pursue your hobbies and passions. For instance, if you like fishing, this would be a great time to get yourself new fishing gear and try it out.
Likewise, if you enjoy being in nature, order yourself a camping rig and spend some time in the woods. Cycling, music, reading, gardening, adventure sports…do whatever gives you a sense of fulfillment.
Related Reading: How To Deal With Being Ignored By Someone You Love?
2. Don’t do the same thing
Some dating theories say that if you want to grab a girl’s attention you do it by ignoring her and making her jealous by hanging out with other girls. That’s The “Elastic Band Theory” talking. But remember, this is no random girl you want to impress, she’s your girlfriend.
If you start ignoring her because she is ignoring you, it will just drive her even farther from you. She is already looking for reasons to ignore you and you are giving her just more reasons to do so. Do you really want that? Being mature is very important in a relationship, especially when you are navigating a rough-patch. Following your girlfriend’s footsteps is quite destructive. Resist the urge to ‘get back at her’.
3. Perhaps, you are thinking too much
You both go to a party and you see her talking to everyone but you. You say to yourself, “Why is my girlfriend ignoring me at parties? Is she embarrassed by me? Why do I feel like my girlfriend ignores me and talks to other guys?“ Sometimes we think too much about things that might not be that big a deal. Your girlfriend might just be reconnecting with everyone more because she doesn’t get a chance to meet them that often.
Ask yourself, are you expecting too much out of her? Are you missing her more than usual and that is why you want her to spend more time with you? She might have always been the same but either you are noticing it now or wanting more than the usual. Maybe you’re being a needy boyfriend and she doesn’t know how to handle this side of you.
4. What to do when your girlfriend ignores you for days? Be kind to her
Your girlfriend might be going through a rush of emotions and confused thoughts at the same time. She might be going through some personal struggle she is not comfortable talking about yet. At this point in time, she doesn’t need more confrontations and fights.
She needs someone who will take care of her and be there for her as a friend first. Make her, her favorite meal, do things that make her happy. Do not come out as too clingy. Maintain your healthy relationship boundaries while doing things for her. It will help her reconnect with you. Compassion and empathy for your partner are perhaps the most valuable in a relationship.
5. What to do if my girlfriend is ignoring me? Assure her you are and will be there for her
She needs to know that you understand she is going through something. Tell her that you’ll give her all the time and space she needs and you’ll be there for her when she is ready. It will help bring back her confidence in you and she will open up to you sooner. She needs to know that you are there for her no matter what.
If you are in a long-distance relationship, then you might blame your it for making you both so distant. In such a scenario, go over to her and talk to her. Find out what’s wrong and be there for her both physically and emotionally.
Knowing that you’ve got her back will make her feel secure in the relationship. It’s always nice to have someone you can fall back on. Who better than a boyfriend to affirm her belief in herself and the relationship?
Related Reading: How To Know Your Girlfriend Is Still Not Over Her Ex
6. Find out if she is depressed
Why is my gf ignoring me, you ask? Check whether her behavior is showing any signs of depression. Is she suffering from insomnia? Check whether she is always tired, irritable, anxious, having mood swings etc.
According to the National Sleep Foundation, people with insomnia are 10 times more likely to have depression than those without the condition. If she is showing signs of depression, you need to take steps to get her help.
Many relationships suffer because of one partner’s mental health problems. Seeking professional help can get you through this difficult time together. At Bonobology, we have a range of counselors and therapists who can support you. Healing is just a click away.
7. Get her talking
“My girlfriend is ignoring me for a week”, “My girlfriend is ignoring me after a fight”.
It’s been a week after the fight and there hasn’t been even one text or call. Text her something that she is bound to reply to no matter what. Ask her something related to your work that she can solve or ask her something about your medicines or anything routine that she usually does.
It shouldn’t be anything related to your fight or relationship. Just a normal conversation will get things going and you can talk to her about the fight once you know she has cooled down. In a nutshell, initiate a conversation with her. Communication problems in a relationship are not unheard of; someone has to take the first step to reconcile.
A Facebook user asked, “My girlfriend is ignoring me after a showdown we had last weekend…Should I text her or will that seem wrong?” Dear sir, you have your answer.
8. Do not neglect yourself when your girlfriend is ignoring you
In the midst of all that is happening, don’t forget yourself. Your girlfriend ignoring you is affecting you mentally too and you don’t feel happy anymore. You need to save your relationship, but before that, you need to save yourself first. Think about yourself too and your needs. Not taking care of yourself will make you a mess and you’ll just become more clingy and desperate, not the person she fell in love with.
Use this time to invest in your physical and emotional well-being. You could start by eating healthy and committing to a new workout regime. If your state of mind is such that stepping out doesn’t appeal to you, you could order some basic fitness equipment like weights, resistance bands and jumping rope to get started.
At the same time, pay attention to your mental health. Listening to a meditation tape for a few minutes a day, or working with a meditation guru one-on-one, can really help calm your mind. Don’t dwell on the thoughts of “my girlfriend is ignoring me.”
Sometimes, physical and emotional absence drives the relationship towards its doom. In such cases, it’s important for you to be there for your girlfriend. Give her space so that she can figure out her issues. If your girlfriend is ignoring you, it doesn’t mean that someone else is in the picture. You need to trust her and give her time to open up. Things aren’t always the way they seem and if you follow these steps, you’ll win her heart in no time and know that there’s nothing to worry about.