So, you have your eyes set on a dead set hottie and have considered asking him out a few times but uncertainty about how guys feel about girls making the first move has held you back. Thanks to patriarchal social constructs, we have all on some level internalised the stereotype of the man being the pursuer and the woman the object of his pursuit. We’re in the 21st century, and it’s about time that these unnecessary gender roles are consigned to the past. That’s where they belong. To help you do that, let’s see what do guys think when girls make the first move.
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What Do Guys Think Of Girls Making the First Move?
This very query created quite the stir on Reddit. Within hours of being posted, the question garnered thousands of upvotes, and today has over 10,000 comments. While responses vary from single-word shout-outs for girls making the first move to elaborate reasons on why this is a great idea, the key take away is that men love it when the traditional gender roles of the pursuer and the pursued are flipped. Here are some reasons that explain why do guys appreciate it when girls make the first move:
1. Girls making the first move is flattering
Just think of how you feel when you know you’re the object of someone’s affection. It is flattering, even if you’re not interested in taking things forward. Men are no different. However, they rarely get to experience this confidence-boosting, flattering feeling of being desired by someone of the opposite sex. If you’re wondering is it alright for a girl to make the first move, don’t even think about it twice. Just go ahead and do it.
2. It shows confidence
Most men have been there. Revising their script until it seems perfect and then rehearsing it a thousand times before they go up to a woman to ask her out or spell out how they feel. They know what it takes to make the first move. If a girl takes it upon herself to do it, the guy is sure to appreciate her confidence.
Don’t overthink whether you should ask him out for coffee or do guys like when you kiss them first or should you send that flirtatious text. If you want to, do it. Even if he hasn’t viewed you as potential interest before, you making the first move will certainly get his interest piqued.
There is an inherent appeal to someone breaking away from the norms and following their heart. So whether you make the first move on a guy over text or get flirtatious with him in person, he is sure to find it sexy. In all likelihood, it’ll ignite a spark in his heart too.
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4. He may be waiting for you to make the first move
Approaching a girl to ask her out, whether it is for a casual date or to start up something more serious, is intimidating for most guys. When a guy is afraid to make the first move because he is too shy or grappled with social anxiety, he may well be waiting for you to take matters in your hands. Don’t sit around wondering ‘he wants me to make the first move or not’. Pay attention to the signs of his interest in you and take a leap of faith.
5. The thrill of being chased
For the sake of an analogy, let’s compare the dynamics of making a move on someone you’re interested in to a cat and mouse chase. Somehow, the men always end up being the cat in that chase. While there is a thrill to the chase, it can get tiresome when you’re expected to do it over and over again. Girls making the first move gives the guys a chance to be on the other side of the chasing game, and that can be refreshing and exciting.
6. Men appreciate the validation too
Being the target of a romantic pursuit brings a strange kind of satisfaction. It feels great to be desired and wanted, irrespective of gender. Men enjoy this feeling as much as women do, if not more. So don’t worry about what do guys think when girls make the first move. Judging you for it will perhaps be the last thing on his mind. For a better part, he’ll revel in the validation stemming from your interest in him.
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7. Don’t let a possibility pass
Not all men are risk-takers. If he views you as being out of his league, he may not act on his feelings at all. When a guy is afraid to make the first move, he may even let the opportunity of a potentially solid relationship slide because he cannot bear to be rejected. So, making the first move and letting him know you’re interested will make sure you don’t lose out on each other just because of apprehensions.
8. All for gender equality
While it’s hard to generalise, a sizeable majority of men today root for gender equality. When doubts such as is it alright for a girl to make the first move grip your mind, remember that gender equality is a two-way street. So, shun your antiquated apprehensions and just get flirty with him already.
9. Nothing as attractive as a strong, independent woman
A woman who is unafraid to go after what she wants has an undeniable charm about her. Girls making the first move signals confidence, independence and a will to go after what she has her heart set on – and that’s the kind of woman men would give anything to be with. Well, men of substance anyway – and those are the only kind worth being with.
The bottom line is most guys want to be approached by women. So, if you’re a woman who’s been dying to make that first move, but you’re afraid of coming off as needy, we suggest you shun the stereotypes and go for it!