Let’s face it. We are always making mistakes in a relationship. It is a given. But they say one should make mistakes and learn from them to grow. Many times we say or act without really thinking of the implications. It could be something very unintentional like taking your partner for granted or assuming things for them. While this may not seem like it is a big deal, it can lead to serious misunderstandings and fights.
The biggest issues actually arise from the most trivial relationship mistakes. And then before you even get the time to correct it you ruined the best relationship you ever had. People say you learn lessons from your failed relationships. While that is true, it is also true that you can pinpoint and correct the common mistakes in a relationship to make it work as well.
What Are The Common Mistakes In Relationships?
To err is human. So it is impossible to mistake-proof a relationship. But if you keep making the same mistakes again and again then it could have an adverse effect on the relationship in the long run.
You could apologise to your partner and they may forgive you but hurting someone or making the same mistake could end up creating issues. Here’s how you make some common mistakes in a relationship and here’s how you can keep a lookout for these mistakes and avoid making them. We list 6 worst relationship mistakes you could be making.
1. Watch your words
So couples fight and words are out and words that are once said cannot be taken back. Be it a debate over whose idea of investment makes more sense or a simple argument over what to eat, always make sure to use the right words. In our anger, we end up using hurtful words but that’s the greatest mistake you are committing in a relationship.
People often blurt out words like ‘you fool’ or ‘you are an idiot’. Now, these aren’t really abuses and all of us have grown up listening to them from our teachers, parents, siblings and friends. But usage of such simple words during an argument can be very hurtful to your partner and can disturb the sanctity of marriage. Instead, take a deep breath until you lose the urge to use such words. This is often a new relationship mistake that we end up making.
2. Don’t joke at their expense
It’s okay to be funny around your partner in a group of friends or relatives, even crack a joke or two here and there about them. But it is definitely not okay to do it constantly. It is insulting and irritating to the person. Soon the atmosphere is tense because your partner is silently fuming and the people around you begin to wonder what is going on.
Not only does it speak volumes about the nature of your relationship but also it says a lot about you as a person.
If you are using your partner’s secret confession and turning it into humour, stop doing it immediately. Your partner has confided something in you with full confidence. It may not seem like a big deal to you but it may be one for them. Turning that into a joke just so it makes you look funny actually makes you look very insensitive and not funny at all.
3. Don’t make fun of their close ones
A serious mistake you are committing is when you are making fun of close ones. When two people are seriously involved, the discussion often leads to talking about your friends, best friends or even relatives. Some people tend to over-share and start making fun of their partner’s close ones. To avoid making that mistake in a relationship it is important to follow relationship boundaries so that you know where to draw the line.
You may have found a thing or two funny or annoying about them but instead of making fun of them, you can discuss about your opinion regarding the relative with your partner and even ask for your partner’s opinion on the same.
Who knows maybe there is a story there that you don’t know about. Be especially careful while talking about the parents. Parents are a soft spot and saying something hurtful about them can make a permanent rift between the couple.
4. Refrain from giving constant instructions
Remember you fell in love with this person who is different from you in a number of things including upbringing, habits and preferences. Every time you feel like correcting your partner about anything, ask yourself if this is something that needs correction because it needs to be done in the right way or because it needs to be done as per your way.
Wives often want some things in a certain way and they keep correcting and heckling their husbands. This does nothing but drills a fear of the wife into their head and this could be the worst mistake in a relationship that you are making.
You will be surprised when you will decide to hold your tongue more than half of the times. We all have grown up doing things in a certain way but remember you are now with this whole different entity who may not be doing things your way.
This does not necessarily mean their way is wrong. Instead, why not try using their method for once? Maybe you will find it to be simpler and faster.
5. Don’t revisit old arguments
Couples fight and make up. And then they fight again. But often old fights and arguments are roped in to prove a point. If you are making this relationship mistake then you are pushing love away.
While you may feel like it is highly essential in the heat of the moment, it drags the current fight in an unnecessary direction and instead of getting resolved, matters become worse. Close an argument once resolved and never bring it up again. Make a pact with your partner to follow this sincerely. This will lead to shorter fights and happier days!
6. Social Media mistakes in a relationship
As couples, we are always on social media but we should try not to make some social media mistakes to make our relationship better.
We could be indulging in social media PDA or sharing details about our private life there but you have to know how much is too much and if you are putting “loves” on someone’s photos is your partner becoming insecure? Or did you post pictures of your new home without discussing with your partner and that got them raving mad?
How To Stop Making Mistakes In A Relationship
That’s very simple. You just need to care for your partner’s feelings when you are doing or saying something. WE often end up inadvertently doing things that could hurt them.
A good way to stop making mistakes in a relationship is to take into account your partner’s feelings, wishes and aspirations. The best way to avoid tiffs is to take a moment before you speak, put yourself in your partner’s shoes before you criticise them and remind yourself that not all human beings are the same before you begin to label them.